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It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, With the giant asleep, Keyleth has enough time to cast Geas and bring it under her control. When it wakes up, it agrees to stay with them peacefully and help attack K'Varn when they are ready. DM: It's 15 feet up, so you can jump down into the ring if you wanted to go down there. Or you can move around this way. Player: Oh gosh. I don't really jump well. All right, I'm going to jump into the ring, I guess. And then can I shoot from there or will the wall be in my way? DM: He's big enough where you'd be able to see him. Player: Okay. DM: So you leap off the side. As you leap in the air, he glances over with his large eye and does a backswing with the club in mid-air, trying to basically baseball-swing you. Player: Oh, he'll hit me. DM: We'll find out. That is an 18? Player: Oh yeah. DM: Okay. You take 19 points of bludgeoning damage. As he (impact sound).

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The ogre's jaw goes slack as it tumbles forward, lifeless. Percy shoots ice at an ooze and it quivers but the ice gets absorbed. DM: Okay. Gotcha. Both shots into it. You see its form kind of quiver at the impact, but it's still slowly slithering forward. Now comes to Keyleth! Player: Okay. I wanna move, kind of be like, whoops, sorry, 'scuse me, pardon me, and come like heresies. Would you say that I'm 30 feet away from that guy? DM: Just barely. Like, he's just in the cusp of 30 feet from you. Player: Will my Thorn Whip reach him? My 30-foot-range Thorn Whip? DM: You can certainly try! Player: I'm gonna try and Thorn Whip him! DM: Okay!

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Tiberius Stormwind, a dragonborn sorcerer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Clarota moves forward to greet them. The illithids remove the helmet from Clarota's head, seeming to welcome him back into their fold. DM: Okay. As they begin to move in, and are hovering forward, looking around the room, taking in the scenery, but they're all focused toward the center, they're all just moving towards the Elder Brain. And they make their way up towards it, looking very intent and very frightened at the prospect of what maybe has happened in this room. As they all approach, you can see that low, dull, kind of purplish glow of the Elder Brain is still pumping, but slowly brighter and brighter, almost like it's coming to more life. You can hear the cage rattling of the various entities that are still inside, like the one that's still grappling Grog off to the side. The horn of Orcus, which is still being held aloft by your Telekinesis spell, is just hovering through the air, slowly rotating on its own, little strips of K'Varn's flesh still freshly tumbling from the side. Player: And it's at the halfway point between where she is and where I'm standing. DM: So right here? Player: Yeah, right there. DM: Not this big, of course. Player: It's really heavy, guys! DM: As they all move towards the center, Clarota, with his hands up, turns around, pulls back the hood, and steps towards the other mind flayers, hands stretched out, moving up to the point here.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Kashaw Vesh, a human cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Being the adventurers they are, they took it upon themselves to leap out into the forest of the Vesper Timberland, found and hunted down this hydra, fought it, and upon slaying it discovered that there was another group also hunting this hydra. An actually sanctioned group, and hunting this hydra is considered illegal in Vasselheim unless you had actually been contracted to do so. DM: 15 feet behind? All right. And Keyleth, you continue up that way. All right, so that'll be the marching order. Player: So I've got my axe out. And may I make a perception check to see what I see? To just see if I can pick up footprints or motion or whatever? DM: This would be more tracking, if you're looking for footprints, so that'd be wisdom. Player: Okay. Just a straight wisdom? DM: Survival. Player: Survival, hang on. Not my system. Eight. DM: Eight? Okay. It's hard to tell. It looks like this area is not heavily traversed, and what little sign of footprints there are scattered enough that it's hard to make out a specific print. But I mean, they have been traveled before.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Across from the entrance is a set of wooden doors which he listens at. He hears nothing, but notices that the door is unlocked. DM: Both arrows impact his chest. The duergar steps back for a second, surprised by the moment, looks really furious and begins to step forward, his size enlarging. Player: I knock him right in the face with the butt of my gun as he rounds the corner. DM: All right. Go ahead and make a stealth check to see whether or not he sees you. Player: I can't use my previous stealth roll? DM: Not for this point. This is an active combat. Player: Damn it. Eight. DM: Okay. So you still get the attack, but you don't have advantage, 'cause he's aware you're there. As he's running past you, he glances and sees you in the corner of his eye and is preparing for the blows. Go ahead and roll your attack. Player: What do I add to this, by the way? I've never done a physical attack. DM: You're hitting it with the blunt. Go ahead and roll a d20 and add your strength modifier and four.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Some of them splintered off to try and acquire the goods that were taken from his store, however they apparently had already been stolen from the location they were being stored in, or been delivered already, they're uncertain as to what became of them. But they get the sense that it was probably best that they chose Gilmore over the gold, at first glance. DM: Yeah. That is going to miss you at a 12. It (swoosh) throws, the javelin arcs past you. This one over here is going to come forward and it's going to take a javelin as well out and chuck it right at you, Grog. Player: Heh, you're dead. DM: That is a 20 to hit. Player: Hits. DM: You take ten points of piercing damage, reduced to five, as you basically (impact)-- Player: (snapping noise) DM: Snap it off and grin in its face.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, After an intense stare, the air shimmering between them, the mind flayer's gaze turns its attention towards queen. Scorpion-you moves to the king, with Laduguer-Tiberius manically laughing on her back. DM: You are going to have a disadvantage on the tail attack, because you have Tiberius on your back and you're trying to make sure you don't hit him with your tail. Player: Okay. DM: So, first two claw strikes. Player: Okay, first one, probably not gonna hit. 12? DM: No, that does not hit. Player: Second one. 16? DM: Does not hit. Clink, clink! Off the armor. Tail strike. Player: Tail strike. Two. Ten. Nothing. DM: Yeah, unfortunately just his thick suit of armor-- you're just hitting at him with the giant scorpion claws, but nothing seems to be getting through. Player: God, you're so heavy, Tiberius, god! DM: You hear this clacking scorpion angrily (scorpion sounds). Player: My balance is wonky. DM: Pike, you're up!

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Before it flies away, the duck reveals that there are two other entrances into the mountain. Meanwhile, you has slipped away to follow the footsteps around the mountain. DM: You follow the tracks, and about 200 or so feet around the edge, and you have to follow them between a few smaller rocks that are jutting out at the base of the mountain, and the terrain itself rolls a bit, and cracks in places. There are small fissures from recent rains that caused the earth to well up and tear in places, and eventually the tracks curve in towards the mountain and end, and it's just sheer mountain. There's no sign of an entryway visually. Player: Can I search for one? DM: Make an investigation check. Player: Do I get advantage because it's a mountain? DM: You do, actually, yes. Favored terrain. Player: Fucking balls. Perception? DM: Investigation. Player: No, I want perception. DM: You're getting investigation. Player: 11. DM: 11? You have no idea where the entrance is. The tracks end in this general vicinity, and it's just rock. It doesn't even look like there's handholds. Player: Weird. I wonder if it's an illusion. Can I put my hand on the rocks and see if there's an illusion? DM: Okay. You put your hands out to feel against the rock, and your hand passes through. Player: What-what! I feel like Vex is really good at finding illusions. Oh, shit! Okay, well, can I put the front of my face through the wall and see what I see? DM: Sure. You poke into the darkness, and it is pitch-black on the inside. As you poke past the illusion, it's about two inches or so of this rocky, heavy orange-red stone, and as you peer in you can see a cavern about ten feet wide or so and about 12 to ten feet tall. Natural along the walls, you can see the ground itself is smoothed over, and it's straight. It's a straight tunnel. It's not a rocky natural formation, it's like it was pushed and carved into the rock, like something heavy or something very focused drove through. You glance over to the side, and you catch what appears to be a face in the wall, about that big around. It's featureless, you just see two eye sockets, a mouth, and a nose. You see a flash of green light. I need you to make a constitution saving throw.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Caleb Widogast, a human wizard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, 826LA video Pillars of Eternity II: Deadfire Critical Role add Good Fortnite Kevin Add Starter Kit season 2 Numenera promo DM: As your cat begins to approach, one of the servants goes, "You can't be in here," and-- Not everyone's going to kick a cat into dust! Picks up Frumpkin and begins to bring Frumpkin away while the page begins gathering a breath and you now see a very well-dressed halfling with a curled mass of brown hair up top. It's graying and white on the sides, who sits up to meet with another important figure. Frumpkin has been pulled away. Player: Where did my cat go? DM: Your cat is being held by a servant. Player: The last I see of Frumpkin is where? DM: Being led back towards where you came, like taking the cat outside. Player: Okay. I count to six and then I snap my fingers and pull him off of this plane. DM: Okay. Servant's probably confused. What're you guys doing?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, A breath of frost kills one of the giants before it is able to do much. Percy's engineering talent makes a showing, between a hand grenade and one of the exploding arrows he made for Vex. DM: Okay. You do a quick little hand gesture, hum to yourself the arcane ritual, and a very large, mystical see-through replica of your fist appears in the air above you and goes spinning off in the air in an arc. Straight up Popeye-punching towards the dragon. Let's go ahead, and Bigby-- what do you have to roll for that? Player: Oh, I have to roll for that? DM: Let me see what the effect is on that, remind myself real fast. Bigby's Hand. All right, so it's an AC of 20. Or no, that's the hand, all right. Clenched fist, cool. So make a melee spell attack. So roll a d20 and then add your spell attack modifier. Player: That's the spell attack bonus thing? Okay. 19. DM: 19. (wham) Just barely hits as the fist goes slamming into the side of the dragon's face, big old Popeye punch to the side of the jaw. So go ahead and roll 4d8 points of force damage. Player: 4d8. I'm taking yours, and I hope that's okay. Ten, 13, 18, 21. Plus something? DM: That's 21 points of damage, nice. (whack) It gets socked in the jaw. The hand whips around again, preparing for the next round. Do you want to use anything, move, use your bonus action? Player: I'm 20 feet away. I will go 18 feet away from it and drop the grenade. DM: Okay. So you move forward right here? Player: Yeah, closer to it. DM: Okay. The grenade is right there on the ground that Percy made. All right. Going to stay where you are? Player: Can I keep moving? DM: You can keep moving. You moved 18 feet backward, you mean? Player: No, I had to move closer to it. DM: Right, so you moved three feet of your 25 feet, dropped it, and you still have 22 feet you can move. Player: But if I leave, he's going to whack me. DM: No, he's this far away. You have to be within a certain range for him to hit you. Player: Wait, how close did I put the grenade to him? DM: It's currently 18 feet away from him. Player: No, I wanted to put it two feet away from him. DM: Oh, I see! There, that makes more sense. So now there is a grenade on the ground, right there. You are there, right next to Grog. So yeah, you cannot move away without it taking a swipe.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Vox Machina, with nothing to do for the moment, head to Gilmore's Glorious Goods. The party enter Shaun Gilmore's shop in Abedar's Promenade, where you makes a beeline to find the man himself. DM: It's all right. There are some books stacked up. There is a small, embedded glass case that seems to have a couple of items that are under a purplish-maroon, velvet piece of material that's currently covering them. There is that beaded curtain with strips of material that block the back room. Player: Okay, and there's a person manning the -- DM: No, not currently. It is just an empty desk. Player: Is there a bell or anything? DM: There is a bell. Player: Yeah. DM: As you hit the bell, one of the employees who is helping somebody looks around and goes, "I'm sorry." What you see is a half-elven woman with thick spectacles who is currently stepping over to try and stop you. However, the beaded curtain swishes open with the grandiose gesture of one slightly meaty hand. Stepping out in his fine, gold-trimmed, purple robes, his longish thick, black, coarse hair pulled into a nice ponytail. Smoothly-shaved face with a slight hint of a braided goatee that dangles about three inches from his chin. Player: Will you remind me because it's been a while. Gilmore's a good-looking man, though, isn't he? DM: Yeah. He's handsome.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, A couple of hours later, the ship comes upon an unnatural-looking fog bank in the ocean. Adella tries to veer around it. DM: But I don't have that time, unfortunately. (all laugh) Right, so you guys, right over to this ship here? Player: Yeah. DM: You drop him in the crow's nest. Player: Uh-huh. DM: All right. And you are currently on your bow? Is that all you're gonna do? Player: I'm on-- yeah, I'm on my broom. I'm just riding my bow around. DM: Fair enough. Player: Can I drift down to where I can see anything and I say to Keyleth, Uh, fog? Can you do anything about the fog? DM: On their ship? Player: Yeah. DM: Okay. So as you coast down a little lower, I want you to make a perception check.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, A fireball trap goes off, knocking most of the party over except for Grog and Vax. There is now a giant crater in the ground and the smell of gunpowder fills the air. DM: She makes it. It doesn't knock her prone. It hits her in the foot. She almost falls over. Roll damage. Player: Make sure I'm rolling all the right dice. That'll do. That's six plus ten. 22 points of damage plus three points of necrotic damage. DM: Nice. (gunshot) The blast hits the leg. It almost knocks her onto the ground, but she catches herself against the tree right behind her and pushes herself into place. Player: That's funny. I'm going to burn an action surge and I'm going to shoot her two more times because it's funny. Where is she? What's behind her? DM: It is a tree about ten feet behind her. Player: I'm going to hit her again with an attempt to knock her down; I'm going to burn another grit for that. That is 32 to hit. DM: 32 to hit? That'll hit. Player: Not quite as good. 14 points of damage, plus three points of necrotic. Another strength check. DM: Another strength check. This one she does not make. As she readies herself, you fire a second time, and it hits her foot. You can see a spatter of blood off the side. She falls and slams down on the ground taking three points of piercing damage landing onto the broken glass and the rubble around her.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Percival shoots Clarota in the head, releasing Scanlan, who had been grappled by the turncoat. As the remaining illithids take heavy damage, the two of them Plane Shift out of the room in self-preservation. DM: 19 on him? Okay. So it's still alive, just looking really, really rough. The brain's just now pierced with a bunch of arrows, some of it, it's barely holding itself on top of its feet. And the troll also takes the damage as well, just seems to shrug it off, just seems to angrily-- roars up from the bottom of the temple at you, now seemingly helpless in the current circumstance. Player: So then I want to attack the Elder Brain again. DM: All right. So you release it down. Player: 20. DM: Very nice, that hits, go ahead and roll damage. Player: All right. 11. DM: 11 points of damage, all right. Player: Oh, wait, wait! No, lies! 13. DM: 13, okay, there we go.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Pike realizes she has seen this place in a vision, as well as a cavern of blue crystal beyond it. They decide to cross it. DM: 13. Okay! You can decide whether or not you want to attempt to ascend this or make any attacks this turn, because right now it's going to take your full round to get to the top of this. It's a very thin, jagged, almost vertical wall you're trying to climb up and hold onto. Player: How far away am I from the stones? From the platform? DM: From the platform here? Player: From something I can stand on that's not sand. DM: You're probably about 35 feet. Player: So I could make it in a run? DM: You could make it in a run, yeah. Player: All right. I mean, in a standard movement action? DM: No. You'd almost make it.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Beauregard Lionett called Beau, a human monk . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Nott and Caleb find an archery range, and posing as father and daughter, try it out. Caleb fails embarassingly, but Nott hits the bullseye on all three targets, winning a crude doll of King Bertrand Dwendal, two wooden swords (which she gives to you), and two rats in cages (one of which she gives to Yasha, since it's her favorite food). DM: "Whoever wins this, gets to go up against our finest solder who should be back from his lunch break here in the next ten minutes or so. We have the new challenger Beau. Let's see." He points over to the grizzled-looking beastly man who's currently chugging down the final bits of a tankard of ale. Spins around, wipes it off his beard and stands up. "Yeah, I'm coming." He gets up onto the edge of the stage and goes, "Well, this is Kendall." "He's a strong fellow. Good luck." He sits down. Player: I'm going to fail this miserably. DM: Sits down at his stool, puts his meaty arm out with the fingers and goes-- Player: Good to meet you, Kendall. DM: "Sure." Player: Ugh, it's sweaty. DM: It is sweaty.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Some of them splintered off to try and acquire the goods that were taken from his store, however they apparently had already been stolen from the location they were being stored in, or been delivered already, they're uncertain as to what became of them. But they get the sense that it was probably best that they chose Gilmore over the gold, at first glance. DM: 22. So you rush forward, slam the sword into the side of the lizard creature. It puts its shield up and it manages to block most of the blow, but it still slides off and slams into part of its neck area. It shoves the blade out. However, it fails its save. Player: Yes! DM: Take a strength point off of it and add that to what you have now. What's your strength currently? Player: 22. DM: So it goes up another plus one to attack and damage. If it became 22, it does. Player: Yes. DM: All right. Grog, that ends your turn. Vex, you're up.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The party realizes they can't hurt the troll, or Beau will take more damage and die. Jester casts Healing Word on her, bringing her back conscious but still being carried off by the troll. DM: Nope. The Fire Bolt vanishes beyond its space there. Anybody else with a ranged attack that wants to try and make it? Player: Sure, I'll take a shot. DM: Go for it. Player: At disadvantage? DM: At this range it is. Player: 12. DM: 12 misses. It's starting to hit the mist and its form is starting to become a little harder to see and it's running with such an intense speed. Player: I've got one more hasted action. DM: You do. And a bonus action attack if you want to. Player: Terrible. 14? DM: 14? No, just misses. Player: Okay, and a bonus attack action. 16. DM: Roll damage. It does strike.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The first figure is cut in half at the waist. you takes a closer look at the room and sees that the second figure is still breathing. DM: Okay. As you slowly slip into the chamber, closing the door ever so slightly to make just the faintest creaking of metal on metal, you slip into the chamber, and you can see there's shelves with various torture instruments just strewn across it. It looks like a terrible nightmare version of Percy's work chamber back in Greyskull Keep. There are two doors in the room, one on the north side and one on the eastern side, and the body that's on one table you can see appears to be human, older male. There are signs of some sort of physical scarring on the body, whether it be necromantic or corruption-based, it has been long dead. There is a very strong smell of decay. The other table, you do see the slight moving chest of a living dwarf, a female dwarf that appears to be passed out, unconscious, and has suffered quite a bit of torturous wounds. You can see hundreds of small scratches and jagged dagger wounds in the side of the shoulders and arms, the face, and is currently strapped down to the table. Player: I'm going to use Divine Sense in this room. Am I within 50, 60 feet of that dwarf? DM: You are, yes. Player: Yeah, Divine Sense. DM: Divine Sense, to sense-- Player: Presence of strong evil registers on my senses. DM: Within 60 feet of you. All right. Nothing coming from that dwarf, but there are a number of other sources throughout the fortress. Not in the room, but within 60 feet of you, you get a view of the chamber to the north of you and a chamber to the east of you. The eastern chamber, nothing. The chamber to the north of you, just beyond that door, there is a signature. Player: And the dwarf appears alive? DM: Yes.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The twins have their drinks and wish each other good luck on their separate trials. Her group leaves the tavern, Grog saying goodbye to Vax as the rogue flips him off in true Vax fashion. DM: You may have even been able to do before you slept the night before, so then you would have all your spells back. So we'll say you did that. So you have an extra Invisibility spell in your Ioun Stone. Player: And I can store three spells in there, right? DM: Three spell levels. Player: Three spell level-- So only one spell at a time? DM: Or you can do three 1st-level spells. Player: Oh! Then never mind. I thought it was three different spells. I've already got an extra Lightning Bolt in there. I won't add to it, never mind. DM: Then yeah, that is a full Ioun Stone. That thing is pulsing with energy and going, "I'm good." Player: I'm good, didn't understand. DM: Fair enough. Percy.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, From the sidelines, Scanlan yells inspiration at you and Cutting Words at Kern. Keyleth attempts to heal you from a distance, but gets caught by a nearby Bastion. DM: Okay. So. As you dodge off to the side, Kern's grabbing his face, and just takes a moment. Hears your footsteps along the side, as there is no stealth to this; there are just footprints. However, Kern does attempt to sidestep over. He's going to attempt to make three strikes at you, with a disadvantage on all of them because he's currently blinded. Player: All right, you seem to be rolling pretty high. You could use the dice that I threw. DM: And rolls against him have advantage as well. All right, so attacks against you. That is going to be a 14. Player: Misses! DM: Natural 20 or an eight. So that'll be 16. Player: Okay, that misses. DM: 19 and 19. Another one does hit. So, wide punches forward. They're a foot away from you. You chuckle, getting out of the way, and as you chuckle, he hears that. (snap) And for a moment, his mind clarifies, even though his eyes are closed with a trickle of blood off the side of one of the eye. He immediately goes into a faster-than-you-expected midsection punch that (whack) smacks you right in the middle of your laughing stomach. Because you're laughing, there is that tension, but it wasn't flexed, prepared for an actual impact from a fist. And you take seven points of damage from the hit to your abdomen. Player: All right. DM: It is your turn. He is still blinded, so you have advantage on all these attacks. As you reel from the hit to your midsection-- Player: I want to move-- no, I'll stay right where I am. Can I reach forward, grab his head and his shoulder, and go in for a bite attack at his neck? DM: You certainly can. Player: (growls) Yes! Aiming for the jugular. 23. DM: 23? Definitely hits. Go ahead and roll damage on that.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Upon returning to the city of Whitestone, they found the rebellion was successful. The undead hordes have fallen to the blades of the surviving rallied warriors of Whitestone. DM: Okay. After asking around for a few days, you manage to discover there is a budding local artist who doesn't really believe in his artwork. He currently works in the stables on the far southwest side of town. But people have seen some of his work and tried to bolster him, so you're sent in his direction and as you get there, you can see him. He's currently in the process of actually cutting through one of his recent works he wasn't happy with and he's violently tearing through it. As you step into the stable, he stops and puts it off to the side. "Sorry, sir, can I help you?" Player: Ah, hello. My name is Scanlan Shorthalt. I was the leader of the rebellion that just defeated Lord and Lady Briarwood. DM: "Oh! The pleasure is mine." He is now averting his gaze and almost bowing his head like you're royalty. He's very flustered and flushed by the sudden appearance. Player: I hear you are a budding artist and I am, if nothing else, a supporter of the arts. DM: "My talents are far unrefined and nowhere near powerful or decent enough for your attentions." Player: Well, I believe in you. And I need you for a very important commission. A great good has been done here by the rebels, by the townspeople, with the help of Vox Machina and of course, with the help of Vox Machina's leader, myself. Therefore, I'm here to commission a humble portrait of myself. You may not know him, but there was a folk hero in my town growing up. His name was Fabio. He would frequently pose with windblown hair and an open shirt on a horse. I was thinking something like that, and also I have this figure of Pike. She's a friend of mine. I'd like her on the back of the horse, arms around my waist, looking super hot. If that's possible. DM: Make a persuasion check. Only because he's so down on his own skills. Player: 33. DM: As you're telling this tale, he goes from bashful and meek to staring off in the distance, the artistic inspiration rolling through his head. Player: Oh. Sorry, 31. I was wrong. DM: Unchanged. He begins finishing your sentences as you're describing scenery and extrapolating on it. You can see the artistic mind is definitely spinning. He looks to you and goes, "It would be my honor. Please." He reaches forward and takes your gnomish hand and you know, you're about two and a half feet shorter than him, but he's still very humble, kneels down and says, "I would be honored to do this portrait. No charge." Player: Please, I insist. I must give you something for your troubles. DM: "Whatever you deem fit, Sir Gnome, but I--" Player: What's your name, young sir? DM: "Jameson."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, In the morning, while everyone else is taking breakfast, Pike checks the front door and finds about 20 skeletons waiting outside. She and you charge out to handle them. DM: And a 24. You take 11 points of slashing damage. Three of them are swinging at you and you're dodging out of the way, and then one of them catches you across the shoulder and you're like, (grunts). All right, that ends their go. Grog. Player: I'm going to charge in towards the pedestal. What's the first thing that I reach? DM: The first thing that you reach over here is a skeleton. Player: Yeah. Reckless, great weapon master. DM: Go for it. Player: 27? DM: That hits. Minimum damage, you destroy it, because of the great weapon master. You walk up, smash. There's one also adjacent to you there. Player: Yep. Him, too. DM: Go for it. Player: Reckless again. 20, even. DM: 20 hits. Minimum damage shatters that skeleton. You can move five feet in and get a third one, if you'd like. Player: Actually, I would like to smash the Titanstone Knuckles together and cast Enlarge on myself. DM: Okay. So instead, you go into full, large-size Grog mode here. (impact sound) There you have it. Player: Fee fie foe, you're fucked. DM: That's your turn, Grog? Lionel.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, you fires a Bramble Shot from Fenthras, but it goes wide and slams into the building behind the two fiends. A series of vines explode from the arrow and wrap around the building. DM: I'll put you just slightly in there. And there you are. You're not quite hidden but you're peeking around the side. Player: How many feet away am I from them? DM: From Ghurrix? Player: From Trinket. DM: Oh, from Trinket you are roughly 40. A little over 40 feet away. All right? Player: Thank you. DM: No worries. That's your turn. Keyleth, you're up.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Above that, x bars against the wall where, in the center, you saw a gold inlaid seal with an empty triangular shape, like a pyramid inverted, and a series of these iron warriors that were embedded in the walls. Behind the stairway, you saw means of smelting metal and other forms of material. DM: As you're running along the wall, it hits you from behind and for a second you feel the urge to black out and you fight through it and keep running. You can feel the warm spreading on the back of your shoulder blades from the blow, and you careen around that corner and stop, spinning to survey the room. What are you doing? Player: I pull up. I'm going to take my first shot. I'm going to take a straight shot and I'm going to blow a point of grit. We'll get to that, and I'm going to try to get him to drop his sword. First thing is I'm going to try and get him to drop the sword. That's a 34 to hit. DM: That hits. Player: Strength save against a 20. DM: Okay. That is a 13. Player: Drop your sword. DM: Its sword clangs to the ground as you fire. You see one of its fingers is bent back and busted from the impact and it looks over for a second. You watch as its broken finger (clicks) snaps back into place and it looks back at you. Player: Okay, so that was shot number one. Oh boy, here we go! I've also got to do damage on that, which is-- I'm so sorry, where are all my dice? There we are. Oh, I didn't do that, so none of that. Where are we going? I'm going to drop three points of Cabal into this, as well. Oh, there we are. Six points of psychic damage, four points of lightning damage, and 16 points of standard piercing damage. DM: Got you. And which weapon's this? Player: Animus. DM: Got it. Perfect. All right, so (boom) the finger curls back and breaks into place. Player: Next thing I'm going to do, I'm going to cast Hex on him. Give him disadvantage on strength saving throws. DM: Well, strength ability checks. Player: Strength ability checks. And I'm going to take a sharpshooter shot. That's 20? DM: 20 just barely hits.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, There, they find a cave filled with magical darkness. Keyleth shifts into an earth elemental to scout the cave, finding that it contains a strange planar rift and a group of grick. DM: First thing you notice one of them is giving off an awful stench. The smell you smelled when you first entered the cavern is now so strong that it's nearly overpowering. Player: Is there one specifically? DM: It's hard to find a source to it. However, you are taking a claw strike from each of them. Player: Oh, good. DM: That is going to be a six. That misses. That is a 19? Player: Yeah. DM: Hits. 18? Player: Yeah. DM: And then 20. Player: Hell yeah. DM: All right. So, three claw strikes. You take seven points of slashing damage, another seven points of slashing damage, and then a ten, so that's a total of 24 points of slashing damage. Player: Okay. (grunts) DM: As all these horribly-muddied and half-rotted claws start sinking past the armor into your flesh, the back of your neck. One catches you in the side. And it all happens so fast, you feel like you're almost spun around by the sheer force of the impact. I need you to make three constitution saving throws.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Fjord instructed Orly Skiffback to plot a course for Bisaft Isle. The Squall Eater still needs repairs from the battle with Avantika and her crew on Darktow Isle. DM: To that degree, you guys have a few days of travel, anything you'd like to accomplish in this time? You've taken a long rest for the first evening. You're restored if you need to restore your spells and hit points. Player: I have a small list. DM: What is your small list, Nott? Player: Okay, you said that we have some cannons aboard. Do we have gunpowder? DM: Yes. Player: Okay. I would like to fashion, if I can, three more explosive arrowheads for myself, if possible? DM: Sure! Player: Or attempt to. DM: Sure, let's do it. Let's give it a shot. Roll a tinkering check.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The group of adventurers, Vox Machina, had found themselves in the Feywild, intent on discovering another one of the Vestiges of the Divergence, one of the many artifacts that they hope will aid them in their struggle against Thordak the Cinder King and the rest of the Chroma Conclave. They've defeated two of the members, three still remain, Thordak being the seeming powerhouse head of that troupe. DM: No, Vax is in the next river over. Percy is about maybe 20 feet from you, but is quickly being rushed down the river. Player: Vax is? Or Percy? DM: Percy. Player: Okay, so first, I'm going to Control Water. I'm going to stop the flow of current and see if I can get it to burp out Percy. DM: Okay. Just pat it. Player: I'm going to burp the river. DM: (shushing) It's okay, Gilded Run. It's okay. All right, perfect. So you see this influx and see Vex get thrown out of the river. You see Percy's hand get pulled back under as the river pulls him along at a very fast speed. You concentrate, and as you put your fingers forward, you see the rapid river begin to slow down at a certain point, and it's almost like an invisible dam gets held up as the waters continue to flow out and carry him a little bit further. It slowly descends to leave him on an empty bank of water as the rest of it slowly seeps to a much lower level. You catch your breath, Percy. However, I need you to make a wisdom check, as this is a very powerful, magically-enforced river, and it's currently combating the strength of your spell. This is Keyleth. She's making a wisdom check.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Jester Lavorre, a tiefling cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, With all the enemies handled, Molly douses the flames on the dead priest's head and calls Caleb out of his withdrawn state. The rest of the party searches the room for any valuables. DM: The one gnoll goes (growls). All right. Seems immediately confused by the appearance of two Jesters in proximity. That's your action. That's your go? Player: Yeah, and then can I use my movement to crouch behind this table? DM: Nah, that's as far as you can get with your movement, unfortunately. Player: Okie dokie. DM: Ending Jester's turn. These two guys come into play. This one rushes up and swings at the illusory Jester; passes through, no effect. This one's going to-- five, six. It does not have a ranged attack, so instead it's going to rush forward and engage with you right there. Player: Okay. DM: It's now Beau's go.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, There, they find a cave filled with magical darkness. Keyleth shifts into an earth elemental to scout the cave, finding that it contains a strange planar rift and a group of grick. DM: It does not, technically. It just means he can move it, so yeah, it does not cancel out the disadvantage. Player: Oh, so I've got to roll a couple more times? DM: Yeah. Player: They both hit. They're both high. DM: Okay, great. There you go. So, as you're on the boat, you can see the hand grasping. It gives you a moment of bravery. You pull out (swoosh, swoosh) let loose two more arrows into the slightly dark, shrouded exterior of the boat. Both arrows strike true into the currently-grappled cloak-like creature. Player: 26 for those two. Plus Hunter's Mark. Oh, wait! No, 30 for those two. And 9 for Hunter's Mark. DM: Nice. Portions of it are trying to squeeze free of this arcane hand. One strikes through its wing, leaving a gaping wound in the middle, where you can see it's going to have a hard time maintaining height at this point. The second one strikes it and actually pierces one of its red, glowing eyes. It gives out this horrible, painful screeching sound (screech) into the cavern as you can now see what was once two gleaming red, piercing eyes, left with only one, and darkness on the other side of its face.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, She Dimension Door'ed her way into the ritual room, which Vox Machina followed over the wall. She seemed to complete the ritual, creating this small, vacuous, spinning black sphere that is locked in place. DM: If you want to, you can hold. You can use your action to ready an attack so whenever a trigger of your choosing happens, you can then make your attack. Player: I would like to do that. DM: Okay. What trigger would you like? Player: When he reappears. DM: Okay, and comes within melee range? Player: Yeah, when I can see him with my beautiful eyes. DM: Okay, so you're holding your action there. Good to know. Keyleth, you're up.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, As they wake up after their rest, you detects, with the last, fading trace of her Hunter's Mark, that the duergar queen is on the move out of the city. They break camp and start after her. DM: Go ahead and make a tracking check, so just go ahead and roll a d20. You have advantage, because you're in the Underdark. Player: What do I add that to? DM: It should be under your tracking ability under your ranger abilities there. In your spells, under you ranger abilities. I'll see if I find it before you. Player: I don't understand. DM: It's on the sheet I gave you, with all your character stuff. Player: Oh. Okay, cool. DM: That one. The one that's easiest. Player: Natural explorer, primeval awareness. DM: Okay. Player: I don't have any idea what I'm looking for. (all laugh) I'm just looking at words right now. DM: It's a survival check. There you go. Player: It's a survival check. DM: You have advantage on it. Player: Okay. Oh, good. So that's 22. DM: 22. All right. Looking around, what you do find is, there is a very familiar scent that a goliath barbarian does have. You, using Trinket's help, as you yourself are not quite as attuned, Trinket does pick up a little bit of Grog's scent in this pathway. So Trinket (moans) gives you a nudge and points deeper down the cavern. And you can see what looks to be a smattering of small duergar-sized feet and two grooves. Player: Two grooves? DM: About two-inch-wide grooves that continue down the path.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Fjord, a half-orc warlock . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, She is, however, always looking for crew, and she's heading back to Marquet soon. She introduces herself as Captain Adella of the Drensala Vis. DM: "Yeah, half-elf fella? Yeah, he was in here a few months back when I was last docked in Nicodranas. Working with that lowlife, Cadmus. Haven't seen him since, though.". Player: Cadmus, you said? DM: "Cadmus Leeland. You know Cadmus Leeland?" Player: The name rings a bell. DM: "He's a right fuckface, I'll tell you that." Player: A few months, you say? DM: "Yeah."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, When Vax emerges from the vision, he finds a small black opal in his hand. you, Scanlan, and Vex head next to the Trial Forge to visit Earthbreaker Groon. DM: You walk through the halls, your footfalls echoing across the stone floor. The large archways and the pillars. It is very quiet. As you approach the edge of the central sandpit, in the center you see Groon, currently sitting in meditation with something drawn in the sand with a finger. Some sort of a sketch. Player: May I approach? DM: The head, facing away from you, picks up a bit. "You may." Player: (jumping and landing) Three-point stance. DM: Slowly stands up and brushes sand from the hands. Not turning, but just looking over the shoulder ever so slightly at you. "What brings you to the temple at this hour?" Player: We have urgent business-- what are you drawing there? DM: "Finish your statement." Player: Right, sorry. We come with grim tidings. Vecna is at large, and we mean to take him down. DM: "I know only what I've been told. We are gathering the monks for defense of the city. Awaiting orders. I'm trying to meditate on where this danger is."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Taryon Darrington, a human artificer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The damage quickly reverts them out of their eel forms. The fight comes down to simply destroying as many of the tentacles as they can, hoping this will allow them to get away. DM: But it's a melee spell attack, I'm pretty sure. So Vampiric Touch. All right, so you use your action to cast it on yourself and then make a melee spell attack against the creature, so go ahead and roll a d20. With disadvantage because you are restrained. Player: Aw. So the lower of those two. DM: Yeah. Player: I can't use Luck on the lower of those two? DM: You can. Player: Oh. Okay. Okay, that's better. Still not gonna be enough. Plus my spell attack bonus? Is that what, how--? DM: Yes. Player: That's still not gonna be enough. So that's 20? DM: 20 hits! Player: Oh! DM: Yeah!

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Yasha Nydoorin, a half-angel barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Wohn rushes to the front door and spots Nott, but falls victim to her Hideous Laughter and is knocked prone, while Keg finishes the second guard ( Phil) and rushes over to attack Wohn. When Wohn shrugs off the Hideous Laughter, she retaliates on Keg, attacking her with you's stolen Magicians's Judge, dispelling the Haste and stunning her. DM: Yes, she does. Nila's standing there, finishes the Poison Spray, suddenly there's this blur of speed, plate, and hair as Keg rushes by Nila's side, actually causing the edge of her clothing to ripple up and back down into place. They're both there, right in your face, and they watch as you emerge. They don't even have time to process what you are. You're just a shape and anger, and they're like, "Whoa!" What do you want to do? Player: I'm going to smack the poisoned one with my battleaxe. DM: All right, go for it. First attack. Player: 17 to hit. DM: That hits, roll damage. Player: Okay, and then 1d8 plus four. That's eight. DM: Eight points of damage. (smack) He looks hurt, like between the poison gas and that he's hurt. He's not down yet, but he's looking rough. Player: Okay, I'm going to smack him again, this time with the warhammer, why not, just for fun. That will be 15 plus seven. I can't do math. DM: 15 plus seven? Yeah, 25, that hits. Roll damage. Player: Then that is 11. DM: 11. With that, he's (smack), "What the--?!" Second hit and he goes down like a sack of potatoes. (cheering) He is on the ground, not moving. His friend just sees it, goes, "What?!" Player: Then I have another action. I'm going to smack him, the friend that's still there. 11? DM: 11. This time, seeing this go down, he dodges out of the way and your weapon scrapes across the outside of the door frame, actually cutting a bit into it. You have to pull it out. Still have your bonus action if you wanted to do a fourth attack. Player: I do want to do a fourth attack. I'm going to try again. 12. DM: 12. Unfortunately, he just manages to duck twice. The second time actually gleans off the shoulder, but the armor's too thick. No impact.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Mollymauk Tealeaf, a tiefling blood hunter . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Caleb grapples it with Earthen Grasp. It manages to clean the tar off the lens, and breaks Caleb's concentration on the grapple by pinning him against the wall with a blade through the chest. DM: At the moment, for you, if you move over Beau's body. It's a tough call. I mean, I'll let you do it, if you want to. You'll have to be standing over her unconscious body. Player: I was about to say, is it in any way that going to give her a little cover, at the very least? DM: Probably not. Player: I'll move in and then move around-- well, no, goddamn it. DM: It's up to you. Player: I'm going to take a couple shots and see how this goes. DM: Go for it. Take those shots, Molly.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Fjord manages another kill with Eldritch Blast, leaving two up, including the priest. Caleb takes a hit that breaks his concentration on Molly's Haste, stunning Molly for a round. DM: You see remnants of crates and broken goods littered across the rough staircase, now that you take a moment to inspect it. Make an investigation check if you want to glance about the space. Player: With disadvantage! DM: Yes, because you are drunk. Player: That's an eight. DM: You find some broken pieces of pottery, it seems like. Nice, polished on one side, with a nice glaze. Player: I'll take those. DM: You can write down in your inventory "broken pieces of shiny pottery." Fjord?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, She tests the roots of the cursed tree for any illusory magic, but it is solid and real. you attempts to level up the Titanstone Knuckles by destroying the kitchen, much to Scanlan's consternation. DM: You reach over and leap through the hole. Catch it. Yeah, it's still open, it's like pulled open and actually-- Player: I don't make it all the way in, though, do I? It's up there. DM: Oh, no, the hole that he pulled in was the entrance you walked in to the base. Player: Oh, good. DM: So you get there. Player: Little colonoscopy? DM: Little bit, yeah.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Tary and Grog see Utugash making some unknown gestures in the air with one hand. you pushes past Tary and climbs through the window to get in range. DM: Okay, so you step through, you get about there. You have ten feet more movement. So that'll do it. All right, so. Player: Can I Blight and then back out? Back through the window? DM: You're not going to have enough movement. You'll get up into the window. You won't get all the way through. Player: (grunts) Shit! DM: That is a 21. What's your DC? Player: Fuck! Are you serious? 20. DM: Yeah, so takes half damage. Go ahead and roll damage.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They see one of the vials to be what they recognize as being a Potion of Greater Healing. As for the second vial, she mentions it being very handy when it comes to escaping. DM: Eight? You give a quick once-over of the room. The place is pretty barren. Other than the large drums of what seems like three inches of some weird caustic substance at the bottom. Player: I hate what you've done with the place. DM: It's a recurring substance. A lot of the vials are based around it. There's a recurring theme of this caustic liquid throughout all of her instruments. Player: We'll have a conversation about what she was trying to do off-camera so I can have a better understanding of it. DM: In what way? Player: I figure I may poke you later to get a better understanding, just so we don't have to bore other people with her technical accoutrements, but I would like, at some point, an out-of-character understanding of what I'm looking at. Of what I could discern about what I'm looking at. DM: Or we could have it on camera.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Tiberius Stormwind, a dragonborn sorcerer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, To that end, they visit a mapmaker named Tyriok to get general directions toward the Sunder Peak mountain. After a couple days of travel, the party arrive at the mountain home of the Fire Ashari. DM: One of them rolls down, and it would have impacted except for the Wall of Stone, it hits-- let me see the strength of that-- oh, it rolled a one on its strength. The boulder slams right at the bottom of the ravine, gets even more speed as it ramps up like a bowling ball and slams into the stone wall. The stone wall (impact noise) heaves and cracks, and portions of it fall and collapse, but it does manage to stop the force of that boulder. The second one comes overhead towards you. Go ahead and make a d20 roll and add five to it. Player: 19. DM: 19? Yeah, I rolled an eight. You manage to (straining) catch the boulder. It's just on the cusp of the weight limit you would have on Telekinesis, but you manage to stop it in mid-air and catch it. You're just throwing it off to the side? Player: No, I'm going to huck it right back to the other guy again! (swish, whoosh) DM: Okay. It's a heavy boulder and it's a long 50-foot distance away so I'm going to go ahead and have you roll another d20 plus five. Player: That's 14. DM: 14. You manage to stop it from crushing your party, and you throw it up and it manages to roll up the side, get partway up, and then continue arcing and rolling down. Away from you guys, safely. Skee ball style.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The room itself is large and octagonal, 30 feet high, with a ten-foot wide square pillar descending ten feet from the ceiling above them at its center, 15 feet above the one-foot tall triangular raised platform on the floor. The platform has a series of symbols carved into it, and a small, very deep central hole. DM: Oh, yeah. The next trap you come up to, you leap up onto the side, using your fingers to dig into some of the holes there, and jam about three ball bearings into the one hole that you see is the one where the bolt is actually embedded within, and as soon as you step back down, you hear this grinding noise, and the trap is pretty shattered from the inside. Player: Okay, I'm going to go to trap one. Ooh, not as good. Six plus six, right? 12? DM: 12. The middle one is still broken. There's only three platforms you've seen that actually lead to this trap. You've broken two of them. The third and final one, you go to attempt to put the ball bearing in there. Player: Oh boy. DM: However, it does shoot forth, through your thumb. That's going to be a 21 to hit. Player: Oh, yeah, that hits. DM: You take eight points of piercing damage.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Tiberius Stormwind, a dragonborn sorcerer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, He, Grog, Vex, and Scanlan go through it to Kraghammer. They emerge inside the Thunderbrand estate and are met by a grumpy Lord Thunderbrand, who had stayed up all night waiting for them. DM: "It's funny, because I already did. I gave you a permanent entry to my own household, my family's household, by offering you this sigil, that gave you entrance to the interior of our well-guarded estate. That was a trade enough. That was what we agreed upon through the mirror." Player: That was just to get me here quicker, I thought. DM: "So you come into my home and try to extort me?" Player: No, not at all! Here's what happened, see. We were on an adventure-- I pull out the carpet out of my Bag of Holding. And this carpet was enchanted once with the ability to fly, and it helped us many times in many adventures. It was de-chanted, I guess, if you want to say it. And we need it re-chanted. And I thought that House Thunderbrand would be a strong enough house to have the ability to do such a thing. Maybe not as it seems. And I hand him the amulet as I'm saying this. DM: He takes the amulet. Player: And not as a trade, but as a favor for just the effort, or maybe because I'm not strong enough as a sorcerer myself to do it. DM: Make a persuasion roll.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, you tries to soothe the creature by singing like Toya did earlier to the devil-toad, with comically bad results. Beauregard is slow to react, still momentarily convinced that the zombie attack is a part of the act, but finally attacks the creature with a flurry of blows that knocks the zombie around. DM: Okay. As you're singing out this discordant sound, folks nearby are covering their ears and glancing back and looking in surprise at this strange creature giving off this-- Player: Does it die? DM: No. However, it now, after taking a few hits nearby, its red eyes-- or at least one red eye slips over to look in your direction. That's as much of an effect. Player: Fuck! DM: Do you want to move, or are you going to stay there? Player: Yes, I'm going to move, and I'm going to dash behind somebody in the crowd, some weak-looking individual. DM: Okay. You can get behind there. Okay. All right, that ends your turn?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, K'Varn falls, but is immediately brought back to undeath by the Horn of Orcus. A ray from his eyestalk turns Kima to stone. DM: Each of those attacks is reduced by one because your axe is currently not magical in the front of his anti-magic cone. Player: Right, okay. Two plus-- DM: I got those numbers for you. Player: There's one more 'cause it's three strikes for Frenzied, right? DM: You already-- Those were three strikes. Player: I thought I only did two. Yeah, I only did two. The third one's not great, so-- DM: Oh, it's 20-- Sorry, I heard twenty-- 21, 29, 17, sorry. So that was-- The first attack was 20--

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Yasha Nydoorin, a half-angel barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Caleb just walks away. Without much hope of success, they try to destroy the bowl. DM: Okay. You hold your Magician's Judge up, you lift it over your head, and swing it down with all your might. Go ahead and make the check for the Dispel Magic on the sword. Player: What's that? DM: It's under the description of the sword on your app. It's a d20 plus-- Not the attack roll; it's under the ability. Player: --cast as a 3rd-level and the ability check bonus for the spell is plus three. DM: Yeah, so roll and add three. Player: 13? DM: 13. As you strike downward, there's a brief moment where you see a flash of energy as if the field is temporarily dissipating whatever magical connection this object holds. In that brief, ever-so-subtle instance of time in which this marble bowl is left in a brief blip in history, it is exposed to the elements. The blade carves through and shatters. The glow, (explosion)! For that instance, there is a brief burst of bright green, blue, red, white, black energy that emanates and this low growling rumble. And, with that, the bowl and whatever enchantment it held is gone.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Tiny Vax, thanks to a potion that does that. you managed to go ahead and put in an Immovable Rod within its stomach, which held it up for a moment, before it decided to truly gain the advantage it needed to escape the circumstance, allowed it to tear through its body, as well as an arrow that was shot by Vex, towards her brother, in the hopes of, I don't know, being a symbol of hope? DM: It may have less than one hit point, in which case, you're just going to turn right back into Scanlan. Player: I think he's dead. DM: Let's find out. It has two hit points! Player: Oh god! Oh no, but wait, I took damage last round, too. DM: That was before you transformed. It was at the top of your round. Player: Hey, I'm still a snake! Well, I'm not going to try that any more. If I drop form, is that my whole round? DM: No, you just let it go. Player: I'm going to drop the snake. Snake was a try and fail. DM: It was a good idea. Just not a very strong snake. Player: I drop the snake, try to get that little bubble of air (gasps), and I'll fucking cast Bigby's Hand. DM: Okay! So, using that little pocket of air, you bring your hand up, you do your quick somatic components, shouting the phrase, and Bigby's Hand appears and is currently being squished between some of the walls of the stomach. Player: Can he move at all? DM: Yeah!

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, From the sidelines, Scanlan yells inspiration at you and Cutting Words at Kern. Keyleth attempts to heal you from a distance, but gets caught by a nearby Bastion. DM: Okay. So, you rush forward with your leg (whoomph) he manages to duck out of the way, bringing his knee up to the side. Comes down to try and get ready for the next attack; however, you already used that inertia of the kick to bring your fist down (whack) right across the front of his face. Go ahead and roll damage. Player: That's an eight. DM: Eight. All right. Okay, and the third strike, you come out to follow that up with a full combo, at which point however, he reaches out, (clutching noise) grabs the sides of your wrists with both of his hands and brings it down to where you're now face-to-face again, left at his mercy at this point. You're off-balance and led towards him. It's Kern's turn. Kern is going to reach back and attempt to headbutt you in the front. That is a 21. Player: That hits. DM: That is an 11. Player: Misses. DM: And that's going to be a 22. Player: That hits. DM: Just (whack) headbutts you right square in the face. You reel back from it. He goes to headbutt again. This time you duck out of the way. However, at that point, he pulls you closer in towards him, still holding your wrists to his side, and he headbutts you a third time. So, the first headbutt does nine points of damage, and the other one does seven points of damage. Player: Okay. DM: (whack, whoosh, whack) Pulling you in, this time releasing you from the sheer impact, pushing you back onto your feet. It's your go. Player: Am I back to the wall? DM: You're pretty close to the wall, yeah. Player: I'd like to take a step back, put my back foot on the wall, and then push off into the air with a huge overhand right. DM: Nice! Okay, pushing off in the air and arcing down with the fist. Player: That's a 22. DM: 22 hits. Player: Eight points of damage. DM: Eight points of damage. All righty. Player: And then I say, you were supposed to be the only lipless one. And I soccer ball the shit out of those dimes between his legs. Nice! 25. DM: 25, that definitely hits. Player: That is seven. DM: All righty. (whack) With another screeching (howls in pain) your foot immediately cracks right. You've now repeatedly pummeled him into his man-bits, and you can see there is a dark stain in his trousers when you pull your foot back. You've definitely drawn blood in his nether regions.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Beauregard Lionett called Beau, a human monk . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Caduceus, Caleb, Jamedi, and Nott ran towards the stairs to the outside. you and Jester waited by the well for Fjord. DM: It does! It scrapes across your shield as you swim away quickly, just barely making it! That finishes your turn, Fjord. Beau, you're up. Player: Okay, what do I see? Where am I? Quick look around! DM: You're going up the staircase, but you're part way up. Player: The water's still filling? DM: Yeah, still filling, and it's still above you, like you can maybe catch up to the top if you want to. If you use your full movement, you'll get up to the top where the door is. Player: I'm going to keep moving upwards, and while I'm doing that, I want to take out the 50-foot rope we have. Then I want to grab something heavy that I have. I've got to have something stupid and heavy that I don't care about, and I want to tie it to the other end. A crowbar! I take the crowbar and then tie it, and I drop it down the well with the rope. DM: Downstairs, you mean? Player: Uh-huh. DM: You tie, take the crowbar and throw it behind so it's like (bouncing) and rolls partway down the stairs. Player: I want to take the rope and double-grab it around me and keep hauling ass up the stairs. DM: Okay, with that, you'll make it all the way to the top. You get to the small inner chamber, which is now halfway to stomach-filled. Making it to the top, you look up and you can see there is-- it's a little bit crouch-down, there is the latch, and there is the lock mechanism beneath it. Player: Fuck! It's locked? DM: Yeah. You locked it behind you when you guys entered the temple.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Yasha Nydoorin, a half-angel barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Jester and Fjord, also on deck, only see what appears to be ball lightning, but they see you being hurt by it, and Jester casts Cure Wounds on her, causing the creature to double in size. you and the being continue to battle, with you being seriously injured. DM: That succeeds. Okay, and that's a good thing. You take 13 points of lightning damage and you do not drop your weapon. You shrug off the numbness from the impact, but it is 15 feet above you. Player: Fuck. DM: Which is out of your melee range. It's up near the sail on the mast. It's your turn. Player: I call out to the Stormlord. What do you want me to do?! DM: Do you wait for a response? Player: Yes. DM: No response. Just the sound of thunder and lightning rolling. Player: Okay. I move closer to it. DM: How do you move closer to it? Player: Is it directly above me? DM: It's above and back, up by the mast and the sail. About 15 feet above you.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Though the armor was originally Vax's, Vex claims it before he can take it back. DM: There aren't usually this many penis jokes in a session, folks. It just happens to be one of those days. So, glancing down below, you see it too. There are approximately two and a half boats that are made of some sort of a combination of wood and metal, like a heavily rusted iron. One of them looks mildly serviceable, the other one is broken with a large hole in the bottom of it. Player: I do a lap. DM: Okay. Player: Go check it out. DM: You look around. There doesn't appear to be much else around, but you do catch what looks like a semblance of a half-eaten corpse, a bone that is left partially buried in the ground. You don't know how long that's been there, either. It's bleached bone at this point. Whatever fishes live in this landscape have picked it clean. Player: So there's nothing in the boats at all? DM: Nope.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, ❝'Cause I'm so bright. ❞ — Grog The duergar attack Vax, Grog, Vex, and you. DM: All right. He turns around. Gives you a look, a strange look, he goes. "Men, all of you, drop your weapons! Now. We are surrendering to our new infiltrators." He throws his war hammer to the ground. The rest of them all kind of look around. Go ahead and, I'm gonna have you make intimidation check on his behalf. Player: Okay, on his behalf? DM: Yes. Player: Do I add mine? DM: No, I'm just considering that, so you rolled 11? Player: 11. (sings along with the music) DM: The three other duergar look confused, look at the dead mind flayer, look at their general telling them to surrender, and they all kinda throw their weapons to the ground, and stand there with their arms to the side, kind of waiting for what's gonna happen next. As you finish that, Clarota slowly drifts down.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Jester uses Locate Object to find the wax seal in another room, the master bedroom, where a rug and a metal cabinet give off magical auras under Caleb's Detect Magic. Jester realizes the seal is underneath the rug. DM: Yes, you can still talk. You're (muffled sounds). You still have the breath you had in your body when it went around you, so I'll say you have enough air for one spell and then that's all. Player: Okay. I will touch it with Shocking Grasp, cast Shocking Grasp on it. DM: Is that a spell attack roll? Player: It's touch, to hit plus five. So I have to roll. DM: Yeah, you would have disadvantage because you're restrained, but it's also smothering you so I would give you advantage to that, so it's just a straight roll. Player: 13 plus five. 18! DM: That hits! Go ahead and roll damage.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Mollymauk Tealeaf, a tiefling blood hunter . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Caleb grapples it with Earthen Grasp. It manages to clean the tar off the lens, and breaks Caleb's concentration on the grapple by pinning him against the wall with a blade through the chest. DM: First strike it dodges; it moves out of the way. The second strike actually makes an impact, so roll for that. Player: That's okay. (counting) That's 12 points of damage. DM: 12 points of damage, all righty. Carves through with the second strike. Player: For a third, slightly less exciting attack. Natural 20! DM: This is your off-hand, so it's not a magical weapon. Player: But its magicked up. DM: Correct, so the extra rite damage is magical, but the actual blade will be halved. Player: Okay, that's fine. DM: So roll the d6 for your blade. Player: That's two to three, so that's five. DM: Five reduced to two. So two damage plus this, doubled. Well no, sorry, the two is doubled because it was a crit. So it would have been four plus three, which is seven. Player: So it was a five. DM: Sure, it's five damage. Player: And then six because this is doubled. DM: So 11 points of damage. Now the armor is reduced to 16 as you're carving away at its armored shell. It's starting to look pretty hurt. You see it shifting rapidly trying to figure out its situation and tactically maneuver best it can. Player: I'm going to see if I can hop back up out of-- am I ever getting out of melee, or am I not getting out of melee? DM: If you back all the way up to here, you can. Or all the way up to the top. Player: It will still get an attack of opportunity on me, though. Without disadvantage now. DM: At the moment, no. Player: You know, I'm going to stick around for now. DM: Okay.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, As well as that, they do some other activites, with Scanlan helping to set up a library and commissioning a painting of himself to hang in Greyskull Keep. Vax also contacts Gilmore to ask for his help with reopening trade in Whitestone. DM: So, Grog. As you take up the blade in your hands, you hear coming out of the ether, a gentle, low velvet voice caresses the inside of your head saying, "You, are you to be my wielder?" Player: What the shit? DM: "Speak your name, warrior." Player: Grog. DM: "Warrior Grog, have you taken up the blade of Craven Edge?" Player: Is that what this is? Do you have a female setting? DM: You hear a long, drawn-out sigh. "Do you accept my power?" Player: There's a power that comes with you? What kind of power? DM: "Do you enjoy drinking the strength of your foes, watching them beaten before you, and have that very power become your own?" Player: Sounds pretty good. DM: "Do you wish the shadows to encase your form and grant you resilience and anger, forcing those to kneel before you in fear." Player: The shadows? DM: "Do you accept, Grog?" Player: Fuck yeah. DM: "Then it is done. Together, we will accomplish great things." Player: Do you have a name? Do I call upon you? Can I call you Bacon? DM: "You call me Bacon and this blade will cut the very hand you hold. My name is Craven Edge. It will do you well to remember that." Player: Right. Yep. Was totally kidding about the bacon, Craven Edge. Well, I'm excited about this partnership. Clearly we will be a force to be reckoned with. By the way, can other people hear you? DM: Silence.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, He takes off his clothes and he enters the pool, swimming to the bottom. Percy begins to panic when he can't reach the surface and he hits his head, filling his lungs with the blood. DM: You begin to reach around and try to swim up and find the surface, but it just keeps going. The liquid's thick and it's hard to pull through, and you can't open your eyes, and you can't see anything, and the iron-like flavor is starting to find its way to the inside of your mouth as it's seeping through your nose and your ears. You begin to panic even further as the cold is starting to take and you feel your muscles beginning to shake and seize from the onset of hypothermia. You begin to head to the bottom of the pool again, and this time, you crack your head on the bottom in the middle of your stupor, and you reach up and scream in pain. As you do, the blood fills your lungs and you begin to feel yourself drown. You begin to shake and convulse as you begin to try to find a way to force it out of your body and you can't. And at that moment, where all of a sudden you realize that this is it. This is the end. This is how the tale of Percival comes to an end. The sensation goes warm again. And it's like all that cold energy goes away, and you're now swimming in water, then air, and the pain subsides, and you're breathing normally. But you still stand in darkness, and you hear these distant footsteps. (clicking footsteps) Sourceless. No light, just shadow. And you look around over your shoulder and then right behind you, you see immediately a white porcelain face, the head is just standing there amongst the shadow. Player: (takes deep breaths) Do you know what I've done? DM: "I've watched." Player: I have questions. DM: "Then ask them." Player: First is, can we stop it? Can we stop what's been released? Is there something I can do? DM: "Many things are released in this world. Many terrible, many wonderful. Many things. Ask the right questions."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Fjord, a half-orc warlock . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, There are two vines, one around Nott and one trying to wrap up Jester. They prove to be difficult opponents, dealing significant amounts of physical and poison damage, and grappling and restraining their targets. DM: 15 points of radiant damage to each. The vine that was constricting around you hadn't taken any damage yet. You see a burst of radiant energy. You watch as it lights up the area briefly. The one that's currently burning around there, the radiant damage burns past. You can see part of it blacken from the impact of the radiant energy, but it's still holding Nott tight. That ends your go. Yasha. What's Yasha doing? Player: Fuck. Yeah. Yasha would like to fucking ragé and she will take-- to ragé. Take two strikes using Divine Fury while she's raging of radiant damage towards-- DM: Go for it. Player: Reckless. That's 20 for the first one. DM: That hits. Player: Second one is 23. DM: Both hit. Roll damage. Still tearing into that same vine that's holding Nott. Player: 19 points with radiant damage on the end of that. DM: Correct. Damage on the second strike? 2d6 plus five. Weirdly cocked. Player: 11 points of damage. DM: 11 points of damage. Hacking through that vine. It's still holding Nott, but it is looking really rough. It's on the edge of keeping itself held together and you can see the parts of where Yasha's carved through and where the radiant energy has blasted it. It's starting to leak this thick, green sap. It's having a hard time. Player: Thick, green sap? DM: Yeah, it's a plant bleeding. If you've ever seen a plant bleed.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Fjord, a half-orc warlock . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, He admitted Vandran had been the captain of the ship that sank. Avantika concluded Vandran would not have traveled without the orb so it is likely still at the site of the wreck. DM: You do recall, actually. It was somewhere coming back along this trade route and somewhere in this space the storm had blown through. This is where it sank and you washed up-- Player: Darktow's over here, right? DM: Darktow's over here. You washed up on this island, here. Player: We're over here. DM: You guys are over there at Urukaxl. You washed up over here, so the storm was in this vicinity. Player: Okay, okay, okay. Yep. Fuck it. Yes, I do remember where the ship sank. DM: "Then, my friend, I think we are going to do even more amazing things together." Player: I agree. I believe that will have to wait until we find ourselves on Darktow, though. DM: "I have been patient this long. I can be patient a bit further. Very well." She leans forward with the wine glass, very close, and goes, "It's been a very long day. I think rest is in order?" Player: I would agree. DM: She takes a big, long drink of wine, sets it down. "Well, there are ways to complete a hopeful future pact together. Many different ways."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Grog is delighted by the offer of a free drink. To Vex's horror, Vax'ildan offers everyone in the tavern a round of drinks. DM: She reaches below and pulls out a big tome and starts thumbing through it. "You know, actually we have openings right now on the second floor." Player: Several rooms, or just one? DM: "Do you need them side by side?" Player: That would be nice. DM: "We could pull him there and push him into room seven." Player: Something with a little bed for me. DM: "Giles!" One of the dwarf barmaiders comes over. "Aye?" "Get Stepheson out of his room, move him to the third floor. We have to open a block for our new guests." "Ugh, fine." The older dwarf stumbles his way up the stairs begrudgingly. "Right, so I can get a room for each of you. We're looking at eight rooms separately, that will run you per evening about 25 gold pieces. Does that sound about right?"

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Fjord, a half-orc warlock . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, However, upon noticing that some of the buildings on the eastern side of town began to light up with what appeared to be flame, you began to approach rather rapidly, seeing members of the city's citizens fleeing, screaming, and apparently there seemed to be some sort of attack. Upon going into the town, you realized that a number of these buildings were being set fire by an incursion of Gnolls. DM: Yep. The two other ones that rush up and come along the flank with the hyena to you, Fjord. First one goes, that is going to be a 15 plus two, 17? Player: That will hit. DM: All right. Actually, it has advantage on the roll because of pack tactics. It didn't really help, let's see here. You take two points of piercing damage. Player: Okay. DM: The other one is going to attack you. Player: It will take ten points of cold damage in return. DM: Which causes it to shatter into ice on the ground. It bites you and its snout (explosion) T-1000 style. It shatters into a million ice pieces.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Grog Strongjaw, a goliath barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Everyone orders drinks, Lionel asking for a chocolate milk. you asks this newcomer barbarian a few questions, sizing him up, then punches him across the jaw. DM: As you're preparing, Grog, this guy who's a little larger than you are, and as soon as he stands up you're like, "Oh!" And he's quicker than you thought. Grog, what are you gonna do? Player: Are we at a table or the bar? DM: You are, yeah. Player: At a table or at the bar? DM: Oh, you were at a table within the bar. Player: Magnificent. I flip up the table in my hands and I smash it over his head. DM: Okay, go ahead and roll for an attack.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, After a while they hear something approaching, and Scanlan preps his mansion as a safe retreat. The figures turn out to be a handful of skeletons, which are easily dispatched. DM: 15's not too bad. You taste it, and you smell it. It's not ash. It's very, very, very fine powder. It has an earthy rock taste to it. Player: And are there any tracks or footprints ahead of Pike and I? DM: Make a survival check. Player: Survival. Ooh, that's good. 19. DM: 19. You do see some tracks stepping up and down, yes. Player: Both ways? DM: Both ways. Player: Shite. DM: All right. So pushing forward, another 30 or 40 feet, roll another investigation check. Player: Not perception? DM: Not for checking for traps, man, it's investigation. Always been. Player: 21. DM: 21, okay.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Pike realizes she has seen this place in a vision, as well as a cavern of blue crystal beyond it. They decide to cross it. DM: Okay, Trinket scrambles up the side of the wall. As it does, one of the white eyes is looking around like an iguana (tchh) focuses on Trinket, (whoosh) goes to whip toward Trinket. That is going to be a 24 versus his armor class. Player: Oh, it hits! DM: Trinket takes 17 points of damage. Player: Oh no! DM: Plus an additional five points of acid damage. Player: Trinket's unconscious! DM: As Trinket climbs up the wall, (shh, groan) and then streaks and falls back down onto the bone, unconscious.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Taryon Darrington, a human artificer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They leave the bar, and Keyleth brings them back to Whitestone. In Whitestone, Scanlan goes to check on Kaylie, and the two of them discuss moving on with their lives. DM: Okay. Asking around a bit, it doesn't take much to find Kaylie in your old room in Whitestone, the one where you both left when you first exited the group for a short time. She's in there, bandaged up, and looks like she's taking a dagger and throwing it into the wall, then walking over and pulling it back out, sitting back on the bed and throwing it, and it bounces off. The hilt hits. She's like, "Fuck." Picks it back up and doesn't notice you in the doorway. As she sits back down, she looks over. Player: Hi. DM: "Hi." Player: You with a dagger in your hand's always a little scary. DM: "Why, does it frighten you?" Player: Not any-- DM: "Boo!" Player: (yelps) Okay, it frightens me a little. DM: She sheathes it on the side. Player: You okay? DM: "I've had better days. I'm all right." Player: Good. DM: "You're alive." Player: Surprisingly, yes. We won. DM: "I figured, if you're standing here before me. That's good. Congratulations." Player: Thanks. I'm sorry that I had to go do that. I had to. DM: "I'd be disappointed if you'd've came back with me. More important things." Player: So what now? Do you want to go back to Ank'Harel and keep criming? DM: You watch for a brief second her tough exterior break, and you can see her eyes welling up a little bit. She looks at the ground for a minute, then looks back up at you. "I'm glad you're safe." Player: I'm so happy I got to see you again. I thought for a second that when we said goodbye, it was the last time. DM: "I didn't. I know you too well, at this point. You're too much of a turd to die." Player: That's true. Only good people die. DM: "I'd like to go back to Ank'Harel. I don't know if this whole Meat Man thing's for me anymore." Player: Yeah. No, I hear you. I don't know if it's for me, either. It was fun. DM: "It was a lot of fun!" Player: It felt like we were killing time a little bit. There's something else that we should do. I don't know what. Maybe your thing won't be my thing. DM: "Let's find someone to pass on the mantle to, eh?" Player: That's a good idea. DM: "I think the Meat Man should be there, just not us."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Tiny you, thanks to a potion that does that. Scanlan managed to go ahead and put in an Immovable Rod within its stomach, which held it up for a moment, before it decided to truly gain the advantage it needed to escape the circumstance, allowed it to tear through its body, as well as an arrow that was shot by Vex, towards her brother, in the hopes of, I don't know, being a symbol of hope? DM: It would be part of the attack to draw it out and attack. It wouldn't use your movement. It would be part of the attack to draw it out and attack with it. It wouldn't use your movement. Player: My dagger hand's the one that's out. I want to try to maneuver the sword around and stab inward and keep cutting bacon in here. I want to attack the dragon, but still from the inside with the hand that's inside. DM: Okay. You're in a weird position now where the blade's at your side, so pulling away from the body, there's very little strength to pull that way, since you punched through the wound. So you're essentially holding the blade right here. Player: Then if I did this, can I just continue to saw in the same direction and do an attack? DM: You'd be at a disadvantage on it. Player: Visual. I don't know what I'm seeing. DM: T You stabbed through, you cut a wound. Holding that blade, you punched through, and the thickness is about most of your body's length. So most of your body is still in the wound. You've just barely pushed through, and you're still holding the blade back this way. There's no real strength to attack from this position because you're being squished. Player: Then I'm going to attack at disadvantage with the dragon blade, and then I'm going to stab with the dagger that's outside. DM: Go for it. Player: Dragon blade on the inside rolled a 15. DM: 15? Player: Yeah. DM: There's just not enough strength to get it though. You try and pull upward and the blade comes loose, comes towards your body, but doesn't actually find any additional part of the muscle to cut through. Player: Dagger on the outside is 21. DM: 21? Just scrapes across the hide. Not strong enough to pierce it from the outside. You do also take one point of bludgeoning damage as the wound tenses around you once more. Scanlan!

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Jester Lavorre, a tiefling cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Matthew will be at Otafest in Calgary, up in Canada, May 18th to the 20th, and A-Kon in Texas June 7th through 10th. DM: Yep. So you guys make your way, reversing your steps, outside of the Tri-Spire, making your way towards the western side of the Interstead Sprawl, to the Song & Supper Inn. Player: Before we leave, are there any benches around, just sitting? DM: There are a few, yeah. Player: I want to leave one of the pamphlets for the Traveler sitting on a bench. DM: Okay, you sneakily slip it into a small gap, so it's visible, but not liable to be blown away. Perfect. Player: Minus one. DM: As you guys make your way to the interior of the inn, it is lively. It is the loudest, musically, tavern, you've seen. You get the sense, both by title, and by the interior, that this essentially a perpetual an open mic night for any musicians or bards who want to come and try out their craft. There are three different bands that are cycling through on the main, raised dais to perform. The atmosphere is lively, and folks come here for that. It's a poor tavern, comparatively. The interior looks like a lot of the paint is chipped and run or crinkled, the smell inside is not the best, but it serves basic food, basic drinks, and at least an atmosphere of music and fun. Some folks sing along, and jump into a shanty or two. As you come in, you can see both Ulog and Dolan are currently sitting at a table across from each other. As they notice you guys approach, they raise a drink, and you can see the rest of the table they have ready for you guys to come and sit.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Pike Trickfoot, a gnome cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Back at the bakery, Tary gives the Trickfoots the run of the shop (to the chagrin of Vex and you, who don't entirely trust the newcomers). Everyone retires to get ready for dinner. DM: She sits down next to you and begins asking about, "I can't believe that you stepped into the same ridiculousness that Wilhand did and it's brought you all this. We just thought he was an old coot." Player: Well, he's all I've known and he's wonderful. He's my family, since I left, and I'm sorry I haven't really contacted you guys. DM: "It's all right. We make ourselves scarce on purpose." Player: Yeah. Well, so you've been taking care of Ogden? DM: "We've been helping out, but mostly me, yeah." Player: Has he told you anything that he dreams about? DM: You can see that she stiffens up a little bit. "So he's already told you." Player: Yes. DM: "I don't want to ruin an evening that's going so well, but he's had visions. I'm worried about you. When we got your letter that-- we didn't know how to find you. We didn't think that you were in the area. When your letter found us, we thought maybe you weren't that far away, so we began to search our way along the Silver Cut." Player: Okay. Can I insight check her again? DM: Yeah, go for it. Player: I can't figure out what's going on. Ugh, balls. Oh, wait. 16? DM: She's hard to read, in general. Even when she was a kid, she was an odd duck. She seems genuine.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They see many Dragonborn with tails who were killed in the initial battle. After inspecting the lair and gaining a bit of semblance of a plan, Percy asks if it is possible for them to take one of the bodies. DM: No, this is more of an icy terrain. Nevertheless, between the two of you keeping an eye out, through this Marduk Enki-loving fool over here-- Player: Bless you for knowing a Sumerian deity. DM: You look off and see that most of it, and its design here is to be a sentry point. The reason it's built over the structure is it has a view of the entirety of this central open valley in the ravine. There are nooks and crannies. There are elements of ice that can be carved away. There are small alcoves that could be out of sight, lower beyond the ice steps and such, but there is no extremely visible pockets or things that are completely out of the visual sight from that perch. It was designed specifically to be a place to survey everything. Player: Are there other perches? DM: From what you can see here? There are outcroppings of stone and elements that jut out naturally from the valley wall, but it's a wide berth from each side. Player: Does this seem like the only thing, or would there be other sentry points, as well? DM: If flown to and held in, yeah. There are a couple of other rock areas where the dragon would be able to hold himself, but this is definitively--

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Nott the Brave, a goblin rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, It sees through lenses and the idea of blinding it by obscuring those lenses appeals to all of them. They decide to steal some tar on the way for that purpose. DM: Nine, okay. It's not that they don't buy it, they're just more caught off-guard by your presence, and not listening to the words you're saying. The one supervisor who keeps rushing forward goes, "You know, lad, you don't have permission. Show me your--" At which point you see Cleff, looking nervously, steps forward and goes, "Hello there. Cleff Tinkertop, we're all right. They're with me." The dwarf comes to a slow jog, to a stop, and goes, "Cleff, what the fuck are you doing down here?" Schmidt drags the bucket about 15 feet off to the side, and it is near the base of the fence. Player: Okay, I'll cast Mage Hand. DM: Okay. Player: Are people looking right now? DM: Yes, they are looking. Player: Okay. DM: It's about 15-20 feet to the left, but they're currently focused on your group, which is gathered at the edge of the yard where they assemble all of their very powerful military weapons.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, In the city below, they watch as a group of devas join battle against a group of gloomstalkers, and both are annihilated by a single swipe of the titan's arm. Grog, hanging off Vecna's side, pulls out Pelor's Divine Trammel and drives it into the closest wound—the first of their three trammels to be attached. DM: The second one has suffered enough damage to be picked off, and part of its jaw gets blasted off, and it melts into that liquid black smoke-like disappearing ether. Player: For my third action, oh god, I'm going to run down a little bit. I'm going to try and get three of these guys in a line. DM: Okay, so you're moving down this way? Player: Just a little bit. I'm going to be one space away. I'm not going around that way, but I'm going to try to back around. DM: This way? Okay, yeah, you can move over here. Player: I don't want to get too far away, because I'm not done with my movement. I'm trying to get the shot as I run. DM: That's 20 feet, and you can fire and hit three of these skeletons in one shot.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Yasha Nydoorin, a half-angel barbarian . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They continue to attack both gators. you is held in the jaws of one, and Nott by the other. DM: In its jaws. So you are restrained. You can still attack it, but you're at disadvantage on all your attacks. Player: Okay. I will try to attack. Divine fury, and if I do reckless, does that mean-- DM: If you reckless, it'll become regular attacks. Player: Okay. I'll do that. DM: All right. Make your two strikes. First one with divine fury as you swing down towards the top of its jaws with your blade. Player: That's a natural one. DM: As you go to swing, the jaws tense against you and (groans) it hurts and all your muscles tense from the pain, but you stay focused going for your second strike. Player: Okay. Sorry, hold on. Oh wait, no, I'm doing this one. 17. DM: 17 does hit, roll damage. This still gets divine fury though, because it's the first strike that you hit with.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Caleb Widogast, a human wizard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, A partnership with Obsidian for the upcoming Pillars of Eternity II: Deadfire where the cast of Critical Role voice act in. Plus free DLC unlocked for custom voice sets and character portraits of Vox Machina, including Gilmore, available to use in game. DM: I think Max is voicing-- No, I'm voicing Gilmore. We're super excited, they look amazing, and we're excited for you guys to check it out. You can go ahead and pre-order now at versusevil.com/criticalrole to pre-order the game if you want to check it out. I love the series and I'm super excited for the sequel, completely unbiased and then biased--hell yeah. Player: Recording Vox Machina and Gilmore lines was sur-real! DM: That was the most surreal thing. Player: It was so good! DM: So crazy. Player: Travis's might have been my favorite. It was fun. DM: All right, 826LA did you make it all through everything there?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, As Keyleth finishes casting the spell, Percy gathers a bundle of Vex's arrows and starts whacking Vax on the chest with it, chastising him for being reckless especially with Cassandra's life being in danger. Keyleth backs away as the moment is ruined, both her and Vax pointing out that the younger de Rolo would've died if he hadn't taken action. DM: As you're saying this, you turn around, you can see she's sat up and she sees this conversation and goes, "Percy?" Player: Hi. DM: "Percy!" Player: I'm so sorry. DM: And she gets up off the ground and runs up and just grabs you and embraces you tightly. You can feel all the muscles tense in her body as she just holds you with a slight shake to her body. Player: I'm so sorry for leaving you. DM: "I thought you were dead." She pulls away for a second and just looks at you, and there's a coldness to her face. She's happy, but even for her young age, you can see there's lines at the corners of her eyes. She's probably been through a lot. She smiles and looks up at you again and you can see there's the white shocks in her hair, and she looks up and touches your hair and goes, "I see we've both survived quite a bit."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Beauregard Lionett called Beau, a human monk . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They enter the next room, but the three thugs have disappeared. As you approaches the gate, a gout of flame roars out at her, causing damage. DM: (whoosh) A cone of flame just bursts forward from the brazier in your direction. I need you to make a dexterity saving throw, please. Player: Oh. I rolled a two. So nine. DM: You take ten points of fire damage as it just incinerates past you. And you take a step back, and the flame is now super small. Like it just expended a lot of its fire energy. In the brazier it's just this low flicker. And it begins to burn brighter again-- Player: Aah! While it's going, I'm going to see if I can yank open the thing! DM: All right, go ahead and make a strength check. Player: (whining) Can I do athletics? [laughter] DM: This is a straight strength check unfortunately, sorry.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Jester Lavorre, a tiefling cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, You had discussed with them, last time, a plot - fixing their seemingly not-very-well-put-together plot into a better direction (thankfully) - to acquire a wax seal within the home of Lord Sutan, to create a letter that you feel would be incriminating. Then to infiltrate the High Richter's home, do the same, and then report them to the Lawmaster or whoever else you think would be of higher estate... DM: He goes, "What do you call the king on his birthday?" The crownsguard goes, "I don’t know. What do you call a king on his birthday?" "An arsehole." The guard goes-- Player: Here’s the thing. He’s not a joke-telling kind of comedian. He’s more of a farce kind of comedian. Physical comedy. It’s more like a jester, if you will. And I push him and-- so he falls down. See? DM: (impact noise) At which point the two guards go: (laugh) Player: He’s so good. He really sells it. DM: Ulog like gets off the ground and glares at you this very furious fiery stare and then gets up and then stumbles again and falls on the ground, flat again. The guard goes, " All right, get in." Ulog now has like a bloody nose and as you ushers him in, he looks back. "Oh, we’re going to talk later." Player: But I got you in the door, right? DM: You eventually make your way over to the edge of the alley, coming up to the hatch that leads you out of the sewer. There you guys see the two approaching shapes of Jester and Ulog. Ulog looking festive, if the wear is a bit tiny, making his hair and beard poof out of the sides of the mask.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Caleb Widogast, a human wizard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The horse pulling the party's cart, spooked after being smacked on its rear end, rides off into the northern fields. The party chases it down and sets off northward up the Amber Road, passing along the way a large caravan that doesn't stop. DM: To be fair, your face itches in general from the sheer amount of filth that's on it. It's hard to really differentiate. Player: In the middle of the field you hear Ooh, look at that! What do I see? DM: Make a perception check for your birdie. Player: That's a nine. DM: Glancing over and doing a wide pass around as everyone begins to gather their things and head towards the cart, the road's pretty open. At this point, the previous caravan is invisible from that height, the hills close that distance. You don't see anything coming your way. It seems pretty open and safe. Player: Okay. I keep flying for a little bit longer. DM: Okay.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, There, they find a cave filled with magical darkness. Keyleth shifts into an earth elemental to scout the cave, finding that it contains a strange planar rift and a group of grick. DM: It begins to curve about 20 feet in, so you're unable to make much past that distance, and it looks like a continuation of the water flowing through, or into; you're not quite able to tell from this distance. Player: (singing) Nobody knows what it's like-- (singing) To be a shark man. DM: (laugh) Percy. You manage to pull from it all the teeth in the process. Player: For you. DM: So that comes to roughly 45 cloaker teeth. You don't know what that'll be worth, but you have that at your disposal. So you can write down, "45 cloaker teeth." You manage to skin most of it. You get most of the top of its hide usable. It's still wet. It'll take a while to do that, let alone in an area where it's dry on the surface. But you manage to pull most of the top of it off, so you have this wet, skinned portion of the back of the cloaker at your disposal. Player: I'm going to build a relative canopy specifically for the left side of the boat so that we're protected and visibly obscured from anybody in the city. DM: Okay. Make a tinker check. Player: What's the bonus on that, again? DM: Well, for that, it should be dex, I believe. Player: Dex, thank you. (raspberry noise) DM: Plus four, because you're proficient with it. So it's your dex plus your proficiency modifier. Player: That's 11. DM: 11? Player: I rolled really badly. DM: Yeah, you did. You still have the hide. In the time it takes for you to get to the beach, you don't have much material at your disposal, and to fashion anything that's on that side, the most you manage to get is a slight lift to it, and by the time you get to the beach, it just collapses on itself. Player: Okay. Once we're at the beach and we have all evening, I'll make another attempt. DM: Okay, it'll take you some time. It's doable, but it'll take a while.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Tiny Vax, thanks to a potion that does that. Scanlan managed to go ahead and put in an Immovable Rod within its stomach, which held it up for a moment, before it decided to truly gain the advantage it needed to escape the circumstance, allowed it to tear through its body, as well as an arrow that was shot by Vex, towards her brother, in the hopes of, I don't know, being a symbol of hope? DM: You can get there. You're outside of the insect cloud, not a worry. As you're running, you're cleaning it, polishing, loading it. Okay, looks good. Player: Oh, yes. I'm going to spend my bonus action to do a quick heal. DM: Okay, your Second Wind? Player: My Second Wind. DM: Go for it. Player: Oh, god. That was awful. That's okay. So, yeah. Good. You can move on, sorry. DM: Okay. Vex.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Caduceus Clay, a firbolg cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Nott and Jester jump overboard as the crewman leaps from the crow's nest to the deck, breaking a leg and screaming, creating an uproar on deck. Nott and Jester make it safely to shore and stroll away to the tavern, joined shortly by Caleb and Beau. DM: (gasp) He looks down and you can see there's a wave of relief on him as he doesn't have this like protruding fracture. It's set. Still, you can see the bone, but it's much better-looking than it was. Player: Let's give him a Cure Wounds level three just to-- DM: Go for it. Player: Or, what does he look like, a level two or a level three to you? DM: With that medicine check? A level two should be sufficient. Player: A level two should be sufficient. All right. Let's just take care of this. Can you tell me what happened, son? DM: "I don't know. I was up in the crow's nest and suddenly it--" Player: 21. DM: 21? "Suddenly it's-- oh my god. Thank you!" Player: While you were up the crow's nest, what happened? DM: "It was catching fire! I was trying to put it out, but it just kept growing and growing and I could feel the heat, and it was--" Player: It looks fine up there. DM: "I know, I don't--" Player: What did you-- what was the last 24 hours for you? What did you? DM: "What do you mean?" Player: I mean like, I don't-- oh, no. DM: "What?" Player: (sighs) I may have left some of the fruit that we picked up in our last stop in the kitchen. I don't know what you've been eating for the last-- that's maybe my fault. I really hope it isn't, but-- DM: Make a deception check. Player: Seven. DM: He goes like, "No, I don't think it's that. It was sudden and it was intense, and then it was gone! It's fucking crazy." Player: I'm going to be worried-- I'm going to check to make sure I've got all this, just in case, because that sounds awfully familiar. Do you need a drink? DM: "Yeah." Player: Come on. We're going to bring you back, it's okay. DM: (groans) He stands up and like he's leaning on you for support, but once he gets to his foot, it's fine and he's like, "Oh, man!" Player: Poor guy. Come on. DM: All right. You lead him over. Player: I'm bringing back-- I'm going to just sort of-- yeah. Bring him back, and then tell everybody. DM: Some of the port guard are like going through the ship now, and they're going through--

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Keyleth, a half-elf druid . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Vex pops Trinket out and casts Speak with Animals, talking to her friend for a little while. DM: You take 42 points of damage from your maximum of 76 hit points as an elephant, as all of a sudden, what little bit of vision you have through the pounding headache, you glance through in time to see Grog's form (roaring) run up and slam his axe into you twice. Player: How much damage? DM: 42. Player: What's my form? DM: 76. Player: I fucking headbutt him, I'm going to gorge him! Let's go! DM: You're going to gorge him?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, you, Pike and Clarota come to their senses, but Vox Machina has lost any advantage of surprise they may have had. Vox Machina hurriedly searches the rest of the floor. DM: It's dissipated at this point. It's thin enough. You still can smell it, and it smells awful, like a very, very heavy, electrical fire-type smell. Player: So I can see that guy? DM: Yeah. Player: So should I notch an arrow and try to hit him? DM: It's up to you. What're you going to do? Player: All right, I attack him, then! DM: All right, go for it then.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The spiraling tower of black iron and copper. He throws a square, metal icon. DM: As you guys step down, the two giant guards step back and begin to walk towards the door to let you out. Player: Actually, madam, master. Do you have any symbols that you can give us, like something we could show people so they don't try to claim us for themselves? Because we're a lot smaller than everyone else here. Something that shows that we're your slaves? DM: "Hmm." She gets up from behind the desk, and walks up the stairs for a moment. Player: Is she out of the room? DM: She's out of the room, currently. Player: And two other giants are behind us? DM: Yes. Player: What are they doing? DM: They're standing watching all of you.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Beauregard Lionett called Beau, a human monk . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Having learned all that they can about Fjord's odd incident, the party embarks on their second day of travel. DM: You did the dodge action, as an action, which doesn't take any ki points. You spent one doing a Flurry of Blows earlier. Player: I spent one doing deflect, and then one to do Flurry of Blows. DM: This is your third one. Player: No. This is the second one. This is the first Flurry of Blows I'm doing. DM: I'm sorry, that's what I was asking, my confusion. Cool, so go for it. Player: Shit, I don't remember. This was what I rolled, right? Okay, not good. Ten. DM: Ten against him? Nope. As you kick both feet forward, one hits and skims off the shoulder. The other? Player: The other is okay. 15. DM: 15 just hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They are greeted by the voice of the rakshasa, who calls himself Hotis and offers them a new contract to replace their current one. Thorbir senses Hotis' insincerity and refuses the deal. DM: Yeah. Even though you're invisible, he looked right at you and cast the spell. You gather that there's something about him that can see through invisibility. With that, he's going to move in that direction. And at the end of that, that brings us to Vax. Player: All right. Well, I earlier rolled a 32 on stealth, but I don't know if that means shit right now, but I'm clicking my Boots of Haste and moving along the wall. DM: Along the wall here? Player: No. I'm going to stay put. I'm going to attack him. I'm going to throw-- dagger, dagger, dagger-- through the air. (flying blades) From the shadows. I have no idea. He might be able to see me like the Predator. DM: Okay. Go for it. Player: He already moved, right? So I don't get advantage for Assassinate, but we'll see if I get sneak attack damage. That's a three, so that's shit. That's a nine-- 15. DM: 15? Misses.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The group gathered together, rode onto a magically elevated skyship, and traversing the ocean, carrying the Horn of Orcus within this holy container. They found themselves, over the ocean, suddenly attacked by a band of what seemed to be wyvern- and griffon-riding bandits. DM: So all of them take full damage, except for this one takes half damage, so go ahead and roll the damage on that. Player: Okay. 3d8. 15, and then 20 for the big one with the Hunter's Mark. DM: All righty. So. So you moved, did that. Do you want to move Trinket as well? Player: Can I have Trinket attack? DM: Trinket-- Player: Oh, that's a lot of them. DM: Well, that, and the spell you cast was an action. Trinket can attack as part of your attack round. Player: Okay, so I get a second attack? DM: Well, no, your spell was an action. So that's your turn. You do Conjure Barrage instead of your attack. Player: Cool, I'm going to step back against the wall. DM: All right, so you step back there. Do you want to move Trinket anywhere in particular? Player: Nah, he can't really get anywhere, it's fine. DM: All right, Trinket is there and-- (bear noises) Player: It's good times, guys. DM: Angrily, a growl in the distance. Grog, you're up.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Taryon Darrington, a human artificer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They then made their way into the city of Deastok, to the Darrington Estate, and were led up into the study of Howaardt Darrington, father of you. They all discussed the reasons of why Tary was brought back, the current financial state of the family, and the intent to resolve and remedy long-standing sins of the father through ' you standing up and doing his family duty', from Howaardt's perspective. DM: "I have only been recently brought into this unfortunate circumstance, brother. And you can trust in knowing that in my studies and my time spent here, working with father, being very clear, and very thorough with the mistakes he's made in the past, I will not be doomed to repeat them." Player: So you and he are two peas in a pod, yes? DM: "Well, he's certainly in need of retiring based on the stress he's put upon himself. It would not be long until I will take over the responsibilities." Player: Well, I may poke around and see if there's another way I could help. But before I do, is this fun for you? Do you like running this business, or almost running it? DM: "It's certainly a better challenge than many other daughters of lords are given in their time." Player: Do you have any friends? DM: "Friends come, when the money and power's in place. You know this." Player: I do. DM: "It's the way the land works." Player: Well, I'll leave you to your work, and-- love the decorations. I'm considering the offer and I'll have an answer for you by tomorrow morning. DM: "Wonderful." As you begin to make any sort of exit, she catches you and goes, "Brother, your arrival here is a great boon to us. You have the power to change the fate of this family. Consider the respect you have for the people who have worked their entire lives to provide for you what you have been given. Mother and Father sacrificed so much for us. Consider weighing one's selfish interest versus the importance of a bloodline. That is all I ask." Player: All right. I'll consider it. With all my intellect. DM: "Well, it's good to see you." She steps forward and gives you a half-hug. It's like-- Player: A pat. The back pat. Good day. DM: "Good day." She straightens her coat and sits back behind her desk and waits for you to leave.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The resulting shockwave of radiant energy annihilates thirty-six of the skeletons, leaving only about twenty remaining which rush towards the glowing beacon of a gnome. you, thoroughly impressed with Pike, jumps off as well but due to the slickness of the wall falls short of reaching her. DM: The wall itself is slick, and as you push down, you lose your traction on the front. It doesn't cause you to fall, per se, but you manage to get ten feet off the actual wall, landing (boof) with a thud in the dirt, and Pike still 25 feet away from you. Player: Okay, do I still have a move, or is that my move? DM: I'm going to say that's going to be your move. Player: Okay, shit. How many are in my line of sight? DM: The 20 or so that are left are currently 55 feet from you and beyond. Player: And are they clumped together by any chance? DM: They are; they're very clumped together. Player: Oh, great. DM: All their friends just turned to ash, and they're now starting to climb over the armor to find their way towards Pike. Player: Okay, then I'm going to cast Lightning Bolt on them. Will I hit Pike? Is she in my line of fire? DM: Not if you angle it towards the edge. Player: I will angle it, then. DM: All right. Player: Oh, and also, Lightning Bolt comes out of my body? DM: Out of your body in a straight line. Player: Can it come from my cock region? DM: If you would like to.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Jester Lavorre, a tiefling cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, The woman goes to look and some time passes, before coming back with no package. She asks for one for Lavorre and the woman checks again. DM: She leaves again for another few minutes. Comes back after that, "I'm sorry, there's nothing under that name." Player: Anything from The Ruby of the Sea, maybe? DM: "I'll check one more time." Player: Okay, thank you. DM: She leaves. Player: I smile back at the guard, like (pained laugh) this is crazy, isn't it? DM: She comes back out. "I'm terribly sorry, we do not have a package for or under any of those names." Player: Well, that's really weird. Okay. Well, tell you what, how about, because it's probably going to be coming, you know, I'm here really early for it, you know-- so if it comes for me-- when it does-- could you leave word with the guard outside the Tri-Spire? DM: "Which one?" Player: The guard house, you know. DM: "Oh. All right, okay." Player: Then I can come and ask if it's been delivered and then I can come, because I don't want to have to walk all the way here, you know, if it's not here for me yet. DM: "Very well. I'll make a note of it." Player: Okay. Unless I should maybe stay here, waiting for it? DM: "If you like, we could set you up with a room." Player: Oh! Yes, how much would that be? DM: "Well, depends on the size. We have our general suites, we have the lordly suites, and then we have the diplomatic invitational suites. Pricing begins at ten gold per room for the basic suites, 20 for the next tier up, and for the diplomatic ones, those run about 50 gold a night." Player: Well, I normally stay in the diplomatic rooms, but I guess the smallest room because, you know, I'm small. DM: "Of course. Ten gold per night, how long do you plan to stay?" Player: Probably just tonight, because it'll probably be here in the morning. DM: "All right. That was Jester, right?" Player: Yes. DM: "Very well, all right." Player: Oh yes, here you go, thank you. DM: "Thank you, and here is the key to your room." Player: Oh, thank you! DM: "Second floor, third door on the left, it should be number 12." Player: 12, that's my favorite number! DM: "So sorry I couldn't be of help with you."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Taryon Darrington, a human artificer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, In the Feywild, Scanlan lays forth Vax’s empty armor for Vex to see. Keyleth says she may be able to bring him back, but the spell would consume 25,000 gold pieces’ worth of diamonds -- which they do not have. DM: As you get down close to glance at the rather disturbingly bloodied face of Delilah Briarwood, the eye shifts back towards you. The closer you get, you watch as the thinning slit of the pupil seems to widen and focus on you. It's an unsettling presence. As you try and concentrate to see if there's any immediate signs of whether it be sigils or arcane marks that would mark it to be more of a magically enchanted object than an actual organic eye, nothing comes to mind other than the fact that it seems to be very intent on studying you back. Player: Can I try to remove it from the ocular cavity? DM: Using your fingers? Player: Yeah. My tiny, ocular hands. DM: Okay. Go ahead and make an athletics check. Player: Nine. DM: Okay, you (slurping). Player: I can inspire myself, I suppose. DM: If you want to. Up to you. How many more bardic inspirations do you have after the battle? Player: Two, right? I didn't Cutting Words anyone. Those count as inspiration, right? DM: Yeah. Your fingers are now knuckle-deep in Delilah Briarwood's socket. Player: I'll inspire myself just to give it a serious try. That's plus ten, so that's a 19 plus, I guess, three for Jack of All Trades? DM: If you're not trained in it, then yeah. Player: 22. DM: You begin humming your favorite eye-pulling song under your breath and with a horrible sucking sound, you pull the eye from her socket, leaving this trail of dark black and red viscera that dangles from it loosely. As you pull it free, whatever attached the eye to it seems to burn off and fall, leaving just the circular socket. I also need you to roll a wisdom saving throw.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Jester Lavorre, a tiefling cleric . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, you comes up with the name The Mistake. Caleb has finished casting Comprehend Languages and is able to read the partially burned papers. DM: "Ah!" He points towards you and, "Um." He's not a very intelligent fellow. "Go... fetch me some... dried meat." Player: Yeah, I don't feel doing that. Maybe you should just go upstairs. DM: "I'm going to go lay down for a minute." Player: Hmm, okay. I'm just going to tie your hands while you're sleeping, though, okay? DM: "Okay." Player: All right. DM: You head down to the cabin quarters to one of the small cots that are there, essentially, and tie him down. He's like, "Mmm." He passes out; he's exhausted.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Fjord, a half-orc warlock . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, At that point, the Gentleman calls them over, and you tells him they mean to be of service. The Gentleman wants to know how they found him, and Beau says that Demedan was clumsy with his information. DM: Okay. The first cards are dealt out for the first round. This is Gambit of Ord. This is different from The Crick-Queen's Call. This is a Marquesian card game. Roll a d8, but keep it hidden to yourself. All right. "So now, I'm going to go ahead and raise another 50 gold." (clinking) Onto the table. Player: My goodness, this is getting expensive quite fast. DM: "Well, we deal with quite a large amount of business." Player: (yawning) 50 gold. DM: So you put another 50 gold? Player: Mm-hmm. DM: All right. Go ahead and roll a d6, and keep that secret alongside that die. "Do you wish to raise?" Player: You first. DM: "I raised first last time. I'm offering you the chance to raise if you'd like." Player: Funny how that works. No, I'm good where I am. DM: "Interesting. I'll raise another 50 gold."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Mollymauk Tealeaf, a tiefling blood hunter . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Fjord is quickly rendered unconscious, but uses Relentless Endurance to pop back up to one hit point. He is almost immediately hit into unconsciousness again. DM: 13's fine, you maintain concentration. The other one that's right next to Beau is going to attempt to also throw its harpoon at you, since it saw that you were the source of this. They're trying to break the spell. Player: I'm going to go ahead and cast some bullshit on that. DM: You were holding an attack. You'll have to say that— Player: This is a reaction. I'm doing a Blood Maledict. The next two attacks are disadvantage. DM: You're amplifying it? Player: Yeah. DM: Okay, go for it. So roll the damage, that's disadvantage on that. Player: One point of damage. DM: That's a 17 to hit. What's your armor class?

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Vex, Pike, and Scanlan invoke their divine blessings, and Scanlan prepares the Tome of Isolation. DM: 44? So you stealth up around the edge and you see now, where once it was divided into two chambers, it now seems the chambers converged once more into a single room. It's not very big, and the tower's been slowly tapering the higher up you go. The room is fairly empty. You see a few vases in the corners and some basic ancient decor. Standing, not noticing you're there, you see three figures in full dark armor. Similar to who you fought in the ziggurat, or the one who was guarding the tunnel that led up into Thar Amphala. Player: They don't look like the big kahuna, they look like the underlings? DM: The underlings. You see them in the same dark, horned armor. There's one that's humanoid sized and one that looks to be halfling size. Or two of them, halfling size. Player: From my hidden position, I want to see if I see any traps in the room. DM: Make an investigation check for the immediate entry. Player: I'm not entering. I want to do it from my peeky spot. DM: For the immediate entry for what you can see. You can't investigate from across the room.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Scanlan Shorthalt, a gnome bard . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, you sings a jaunting welcoming song, Hello, we're here to pay you calling. Hello, hello, I don't know what rhymes with calling. DM: As you scamper by, behind Magrim, following him towards the kitchen area of the abode, Magrim stops and turns, rubs his stomach, goes (groaning) and continues walking forward, seemingly unperturbed by the sound. Player: I'm snooping around, trying to see if there's any lords or higher ranking individuals in the area. DM: Okay, I'll say within the time that you have within the house, you wander through quite a few rooms. There's a wonderful music room, which contains a number of dwarven instruments that you've read of and many instruments that you know as well. You actually find another, what do you call it again? A shawm? Player: Shawm. DM: A shawm. You find another shawm within, more finely crafted than the one that you have. Player: Oh fuck. DM: A gift of lords, if you will.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vex Vex'ahlia, a half-elf ranger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, As well as that, they do some other activites, with Scanlan helping to set up a library and commissioning a painting of himself to hang in Greyskull Keep. Vax also contacts Gilmore to ask for his help with reopening trade in Whitestone. DM: The speed of that as it continues forward. You get word back. Nothing from Allura Vysoren yet. Eskil does respond, saying he is currently finishing up some personal business, but will make his way towards Whitestone within a couple weeks, with some of his compatriots who may also be of aid. Information has been gotten across, but it won't be until probably after this festival for them to begin their investigation. However, in the meantime, Keeper Yennen and a few of the smaller local arcanists do make a couple trips down to inspect the ziggurat themselves. When they return, Yennen is at a loss. Most of them don't quite understand the nature of the magic there. It seems to be immobile. It seems to be completely either negating, consuming, or preventing any sort of magical force within a specific radius of it. A lot of their normal arcane methods of inspecting or divine methods of inspecting this site are not functional. This is more like bring old tomes and research historical records of things that may be similar to this. So when you bring up that you had reached out to Eskil Ryndarien with the information you had, you gather that will probably be a much more fruitful endeavor. As of right now, no one has any clue what this is. Player: And we searched the Briarwoods' library that they had gathered together that say anything about-- DM: Yeah. Player: Okay. DM: Some of the information you acquired from Scanlan's memory and a little bit of research into Vecna. Very little information really exists, but as the keeper of secrets, you get the sense that most anything of importance in dealing with this ritual has been destroyed as part of its preparation because secrets are meant to be kept and hoarded. So not much luck in that regard, unfortunately. However, as the second week draws to a close, the Winter's Crest day comes forward. As the morning crests into the proper Winter's Crest festival, you all awaken in Castle Whitestone to an unusually cold morning. As you look out, there is a fresh dusting of white snow that has gently caressed the entirety of this valley and the entire city itself. You all get yourselves ready, gather your belongings and preparing for the festival you've been helping get ready this entire week, you walk down towards Whitestone itself. As you get to the outskirts of the city, you can already hear in the distance music beginning to play. Blue and white ribbons are hung up all throughout the town, on the outside of buildings, outside of taverns, outside of even the remaining wreckage that is only partially built. It seems that overnight, people just went through the town and decorated whatever needed to be decorated to wipe clean the memory of the recent trials and difficulty that everyone's undergone. You begin to make your way towards the center of the town, to the town square where the Sun Tree is, and as you approach, you now see the source of the music, as a number of individuals in the town have brought out their instruments. They're playing, some more discordant than others, but overall, a sense of joy as people for the first time in a long time are truly embracing this positive atmosphere. You see children laughing and running through the streets. You can smell fresh-cooked pies and various bakery items just filling the air around you. Looking over, as you approach the Sun Tree, you can see where once bodies hung from its boughs, there now are strings of blue and white ribbons that are intertwined with each other, braided and set across from branch to branch. You can see fine little glass structures that have been hand blown and left to drape from them to be part of the festivities. As you begin to make your way up there, immediately people begin to notice your presence, and you can see people in the streets begin to gather up and begin cheering. You hear voices mutter out, "Vox Machina!" People start reaching out and shaking your hands. "Thank you so much, thank you." You're taken aback by the attention. It's reminding you a little bit of the awkwardness you had with the last Winter's Crest in Emon. Player: Be on the lookout for eggs, giant frosty-looking eggs. DM: You make your way towards the Sun Tree and there you see Keeper Yennen is in the process of speaking with a few of the people that helped him with this entire rebellion, in setting up this event, and he greets you all as you approach. "Oh, my friends! How wondrous. Glad to see you are all wakened and ready and well rested, I assume."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Victor isn't home and the workers on the roof say he has been gone for a couple of hours. Percy opens the door gingerly and doesn't see Victor. DM: (thud) You see off to the side, what you didn't initially notice as you entered, what appears to be a wooden trapdoor in the far corner that (thud). Player: Oh, sweet gods of Pelor! DM: (repeated thuds) And you notice that apparently something-- a large sack of some heavy material has rolled off a nearby table and is now currently holding the door down. Player: Okay. DM: You hear a muffled, "I'm inside!" Player: I'm going to go try and lift it. (grunts) DM: You lift it up, set it off to the side. (boosh) "(coughing) What's going on? You trying to kill me?" Player: No! Hello, Victor. I was just to give you money. You were stuck-- you had gotten stuck down-- what is down there? DM: "This is my mining building."

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Tiberius Stormwind, a dragonborn sorcerer . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Laina brings up the subject of payment for the staff at Greyskull Keep, so Vax, Vex and you front their wages. DM: "Thank you kindly, Tiberius. Thank you." And he wanders off and begins counting out change into a smaller purse. Player: When they start to go, I'd like to go to the temple with the sigils and talk to the guy who runs the place. DM: Oh, you mean the Lyceum? Player: Yeah. DM: Okay, the Alabaster Lyceum. Player: Yeah, because I learned something new this week and I was like, I'm dumb. But that's where I would like to head. DM: All right. So you make your way towards the Alabaster Lyceum. The rest of you head down into Percy's workshop. So you head around the outskirts of the inner portion of the keep itself, down the stairway that leads to the basement floor, which contains a small cell, like a holding cell that you had constructed for you in case you had somebody to take prisoner at some point. To the right. To the left of you, there's a small turning hallway that leads to the workshop. The workshop contains a series of various tools, workbenches. It actually has a working forge, with anvil and various blacksmithing tools. And as you guys come down, the heat is already blasting from it, and you can see Percy madly diving into work of some kind.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Vax Vax'ildan, a half-elf rogue . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, They say their goodbyes. Vex gives him one of the two gate stones, and with that, Scanlan leaves the castle with Kaylie. DM: Pike kinda walks up to you as they walk out of the room and puts her gauntleted hand on your shoulder and just says, "We all make mistakes, I make 'em a lot." Player: Yeah. DM: You have a lot of other people to look up to, aside from just me. Player: I've learned that. DM: His path is his own. And he'll come back. Right? Player: I don't know. But he's our friend. I like having him around. DM: Me too. (sighs) Let's get a drink. Player: What? MATT Let's get a drink. Let's get a drink. You wanna go in town? DM: Yeah.

It's a fantasy role-playing game. DM: You are Percival de Rolo, a human gunslinger . You are the member of the famous group of adventurers. Previously, Ripley hopes that there isn't as Percy opens the door, pushing the doctor in as he enters behind her. The room itself is dark as Grog lights up a torch and hands it to Percy. DM: Okay. You glance about the room. It's lived in. The actual bed covers themselves are pulled off. You can see she has a vanity mirror cabinet in the far corner. It's all put away. The chair's open a little, like it was stepped out of. The room is absent of anyone. Player: I walk over to the closet. I open it. DM: Okay. You open the closet. She has outfits there. Many of them don't appear to have been worn in a while. Player: Looking for signs of life with the paper on the desk. DM: You search her desk? Player: Yes. DM: Make an investigation check.