&gt; It doesn&#x27;t mean that &quot;you suck at SQL&quot; isn&#x27;t also a valid critique.<p>Completely disagree.  &quot;You need to learn more about SQL&quot; communicates the same information without the gratuitously negative tone.<p>&gt; You&#x27;d probably hate being on my team and I&#x27;d probably hate being on yours<p>It&#x27;s pretty clear that I would hate being on yours, but I&#x27;m not so sure you&#x27;d hate being on mine.  It is possible to communicate directly and effectively about technical matters while still being courteous and professional.  As team lead I strive to set this tone, in large part by being open to criticism about my own work.