This story and the comments here really strike home to me.  I too am used to talking in very precise language and when I choose words to say, I choose them with carefully thought-out intent.  However, this all happens naturally and very fast in my brain, so it doesn&#x27;t look to other people like I&#x27;m thinking carefully about what I&#x27;m saying.<p>I am now a manager of people.  I have discovered that I suck at it.  I have discovered that it&#x27;s because so-called normal people don&#x27;t talk precisely.  They rely on emotions, interpreting the unsaid, and so on, especially in Asia where I am currently located.<p>I&#x27;ve had a ton of these communication issues with friends, family, co-workers, etc, at various points in my life.  I&#x27;ve learned to adjust for other people, and some people have learned to adjust for me.  But wow, does it take effort from both sides.  If only one side is willing to make an effort to achieve understanding, my experience is that it usually doesn&#x27;t resolve fully.<p>One story still rings for me.  My family had a condo that we were renting out to people.  The tenant moved out, so we were looking for a new tenant.  I suggested Craigslist, but my father also wanted to put an ad in the local newspaper website&#x27;s Classified section.  I can&#x27;t remember the exact cost, but it was ~$200 to put up the ad for a certain amount of time.  What the heck.  No Dad, let&#x27;s not do that.  Try Craigslist first, see whether you can get a tenant that way that would satisfy you.<p>Mom hears us arguing, she asks what&#x27;s going on.  I say that Dad wants to pay the newspaper for an ad on their website to find a new tenant.  Mom says, &quot;Well, if it&#x27;s to find a new tenant, why not?  Even if it&#x27;s $300, that&#x27;s a great idea!&quot;  At that point, I threw up my hands and said OK, whatever.<p>A little while later, Mom receives the credit card bill.  She freaks out over this ~$200 charge, why did we pay so much for whatever this thing is?  I blew up because she&#x27;s the one who had said it was OK to pay over $300 if necessary.  She was so confused and said, &quot;But that was just an expression!  I didn&#x27;t mean actually pay over $300!&quot;  We had a long talk about how to communicate.<p>And now as a people manager, I discover that I must have this type of conversation every day.  It was much easier when I didn&#x27;t have to deal with ambiguity directly.  Before, I could just wash away the ambiguity with detailed requirements documents, contracts, project schedules, knowledge bases, and the like.  I am finding that I suck at talking with people.  It was much easier when I was a project&#x2F;program manager or a developer.<p>It&#x27;s odd because I was great at talking with people when they&#x27;re simply my client.  I can provide amazing customer service, especially for difficult customers.  The dynamic is completely different as a people manager.  I think in my previous situations, I was driving the conversation to dig out problem details regarding technical stuff and working towards solutions with others.  Much more black and white.  Whereas currently, I&#x27;m trying to dig out problem details regarding feelings and personality disputes.  So not black and white.