You remind me of Rabbi Zalman Schacter-Shalomi. He was inspired by LSD to explore the mystical side of Judaism. But aspects of the LSD experience bothered him:<p>&gt; It also wasn&#x27;t Jewish enough for me. A universe in which everything was happening, regardless of whether it was kosher or not, wasn&#x27;t Jewish enough.<p><a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;books.google.com&#x2F;books?id=HZq2YrPxL1IC" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;books.google.com&#x2F;books?id=HZq2YrPxL1IC</a><p><a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.nytimes.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;07&#x2F;09&#x2F;us&#x2F;zalman-schachter-shalomi-jewish-pioneer-dies-at-89.html?_r=0" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.nytimes.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;07&#x2F;09&#x2F;us&#x2F;zalman-schachter-shalom...</a><p>Perhaps you are also a bit bothered by some aspects of your experiences that do not totally agree with materialism? Excuse me, but do you possibly feel ashamed to have thought certain things while tripping, perhaps concerned that you were delusional? Or maybe not, not everybody thinks that way.<p>Are you truly &quot;impressed and amazed&quot; by chemistry alone? Many feel that modern materialism is a cheap and disappointing answer to the question of what is really actually going on in the universe, the sum total of everything that is and will be. But of course chemistry is part of it, and it is really amazing.