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We want to thank everyone who has been so supportive during this difficult time of postponing our wedding. Although we have a new 2021 date, all other details remain the same. Our re-save the date was emailed out to all guests. Look out for a formal invite in the mail in early 2021! Chris: Alexa and I met on the first day of school. Social butterfly that I am, I kicked off our conversation by inquiring if her Internet was working (to this day a question I regularly ask as I tend to mess around with things while she wants to watch Netflix). A History and Comp Sci major wouldn't strike you as an obvious pair, but luckily she found her way into Higher Education and I was really good about Red Fridays. After 4 years developing our friendship, we found ourselves working together in the Dean of Students Office. This gave rise to two very important things: lax lunch schedules and the opportunity to impress with feats of physical labor. We learned a lot about each other both personally and professionally and began to balance each other out and rub off on one another. I found myself spending more time in the office (great for our boss, probably not as great for my GPA) just to be able to spend time with her, and oddly enough we had way more dinners together too (luckily we took turns paying/cooking since she's an independent woman who don't need no man). Eventually I came around to the fact that Alexa and I were more than friends, something other people seemed to know way before. Regardless, we made it official, and it's been 5 years of me learning there's more to life than what I can build on my laptop (not too much) and Alexa finding motivation to do things she never thought she could (half marathons, living somewhere that isn't Long Island). At the end of 2018 I finally got my act together (and a couple pay raises) and we once again made it official. Now we're so excited to continue the fun and shenanigans for the rest of our lives and are thrilled to kick off this next phase with our family and friends! Soul Sister of the bride. Fellow Disney fanatic. Event planner extraordinaire. Cousin of the bride. Her go-to in the family. Mom of flower girl Noelle & ring bearer Matteo. Sister of the groom. Shares the bride's love of the beach & Broadway. PT by day, DIY Crafter by night. High school friend of the bride. Shares the bride's obsession with One Tree Hill. Always figures out how to split the check. Childhood friend of the bride. Co-owner of their childhood business Krafty Kids. Friend with the most inside jokes. Cousin of the bride. Real life Disney Princess. Mom of twins. Cousin of the bride. Mini-me of the bride. Likes the groom better. Niece of the bride. Unicorn lover. Drama queen like her aunt. Rob is a friend of the Bride and Groom. He's been there through the range of worst days to best, managed to graduate twice and still get paid to party in college. John is the brother of the Groom. Always down for a Super Smash Brothers tournament, helping you build a custom PC, or goofing around on the dance floor. Steve is the brother[-in-law] of the Groom. A lawyer by day, he's got no objections to overruling party poopers and meeting new people. Brendan is a cousin of the groom. Doctor of pharmacy, organizing big families, and having a good time. Amit is a friend of the Bride and Groom. Able to simultaneously be the youngest and oldest person at a get-together, hang with him for stock picks and party tips & tricks. Peter is a cousin of the Bride. From board games to beer he knows exactly what you'll like and how to keep the party going. Matteo is a cousin of the Bride. Shares with the Bride and Groom a love for cheese and Mickey Mouse.

A couple of days ago, I posted the above picture on my Facebook and Instagram. Fellow moms were sympathetic to my overflowing cart and let me know I’m not alone. So I thought I’d delve a little deeper into the actual trip behind the cart. I’m going to start off by saying I have a serious love/hate relationship with Walmart. Yes, that was at Walmart! What do I love about that place? Well, it’s a one stop shop. Not only can I get food, but I can also get toilet paper and 12 gauge shotgun shells. All at the same store! Pretty amazing, right?!?! On to the hate part….. well, I hate that it’s always so crowded. And crowded with people who are quite the characters. Not everyone shopping there is “out there” but come on, we’ve all seen the “People of Walmart” pictures. And it’s totally true! Second, they seem to constantly be out of stock of specific items I go there to get. And third, it’s crowded. I know I already said that, but I really hate fighting my way down the aisles and waiting in long lines. I’m kind of a germaphobe and being so close to strangers freaks me out just a tad. Aside from that, on this recent trip I knew I needed a lot of stuff because I hadn’t gone grocery shopping for at least a week and a half. My kids were pleading with me to go shopping because we had “nothing” in the house. So I knew I was in for picking up a big haul at the store. And since my kids were at school, I was all alone pushing the cart and the possibility of a second cart was completely out. One item on my list was chicken food. And of course Walmart carries that!!! So I loaded that 40 pound bag under the cart but I was a little off and it was hanging off a bit. So I pulled on the bottom of the bag and tried to get it onto the cart better and lo and behold, the bag ripped off at the label and I slammed my arm into the cart. Let me back up a little and say that the day prior, Adam and I had played in the mom/pop softball tournament for our oldest daughter’s softball league. And who knew that playing softball was a full body exercise! I didn’t. So my whole entire body was aching. And slamming my already super sore arm on the cart just made me feel angry and like crying all at the same time. I hate you Walmart. Next, I needed tissues. You know, Kleenex (but I like Puffs). And at this exact time, about 10 employees were rearranging that whole aisle and had put away the ENTIRE stock of tissue. So I had to ask and they had to go back and get it not only for me, but another woman who appeared as dismayed as I was that they’d removed the tissue! On, and on I can go (they were out of stock of so many things I went there for) but it wasn’t my best shopping trip. I ended up spending $300+ and still wasn’t able to get everything I needed, simply because there was just no more room in my cart. It was miraculous that I got it all back into the cart after it was bagged up, but I do attribute that to my neat and orderly loading of the belt and packing of the cart. But I did end up picking up a couple of items that are to die for!!! This frozen custard is bound to make me gain some unwanted pounds and these mini naans are perfect for little pizzas for the kids to take to school.

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Brec Bassinger Sexy Costumes Win Halloween Recently turned 18-year-old Nickelodeon star Brec Bassinger wins Halloween this year, as she flaunts her tight nubile body in three sexily halal costumes in the photos below. As you can see from these photos, Brec’s first costume is as a Muslim’s concubine. No doubt it is quite a thrill for Brec to fantasize about .. Chantel Jeffries Nude Selfies And Video Leaked Social media star Chantel Jeffries appears to have just leaked the nude selfies above and below online. The topless nude photo above looks like it is a screenshot from a yet to be released video recording… However as you can see in the video below, some nude clips of Chantel have already made their way .. 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Katy Perry Flaunts Her Tits And Ass Rehearsing At The DNC Tonight is the final night of the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia (thank Allah), and pop star and huge Hillary Clinton supporter Katy Perry will be taking the stage to perform her new hit song “Rise”. Katy Perry was caught on camera rehearsing her performance for tonight’s show, and as you can see in the .. Bella Thorne Full Tit Slip Photos Bella Thorne “accidentally” fully slips out her nude titty while walking around braless in an unbuttoned shirt in the photos below. Of course Bella did not stop at just popping out her bare breast, as she also put on a thong bikini and paraded around her AIDS riddled ass in the candid pics below. .. Georgia May Foote New Nude Photos Leaked British actress and model Georgia May Foote appears to have just begun leaking a new set of her nude photos online in the gallery below. This new set of Georgia May Foote leaked photos is certainly sweet vindication for this holy Islamic website, as some infidels dared to challenge our integrity by questioning the .. Bella Thorne Bikini Ass Display For The New Year Bella Thorne rang in the new year by doing the same thing that she is going to be doing for the next 364 days, as she prostitutes her teen ass in a thong bikini on Snapchat in the video above and photos below. Certainly Bella’s tight round little ass is her only redeeming quality, for .. Kimberley Garner Airs Out Her Ass In A Thong Kimberley Garner once again shows why she is said to have one of the best butts in Britian, as she airs out her ass cheeks on a beach in a thong in the photos below. Say what you will about England being a country of pasty snaggletoothed flaming homofags, but at least they have .. Cierra Ramirez Nude Video And Photos Leaked “The Fosters” star Cierra Ramirez has just had the nude video above and photos below leaked online. 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Michelle Monaghan Nude Sex Scene From “Fort Bliss” Brightened The video below features Michelle Monaghan’s nude sex scene from the film “Fort Bliss” expertly brightened. It is amazing how many of these heathen Hollywood sex scenes are shot in the dark in a futile attempt to protect the “modesty” of the brazen harlot actresses involved. This Michelle Monaghan nude sex scene from “Fort Bliss” .. Catching Up With Ariana Grande’s Booty On Tour The last time we saw Ariana Grande she was licking donuts and declaring her hatred for America and Americans. Of course since then Ariana was forced to issue a disingenuous apology, which she delivered on her knees while nearly fellating the microphone in the photo above. Though to Ariana’s credit at least her mic is .. 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Jolene Blalock is an American actress and model who is best known for playing the Vulcan first officer and science officer T’Pol on the UPN science-fiction series Star Trek: Enterprise.She was born on March 5, 1975, in San Diego, California, United States.She has a net worth of $20 million.Read More Alesha Dixon is a famous British Pop musician, a singer, dancer-rapper as well as a model and also a TV personality now, best known for being a member of the trio Mis-Teeq.She was born on October 7, in the year 1978, in Welwyn Garden City, England.She has an estimated net worth of around $4 millionRead More Vanessa Britting is an American actress. She is famous for Without a Trace, Big Breaks, and The Unit. She was born on 30th August 1980 in Rockaway, New Jersey, USA. Currently, her age is 39 years.She is a married woman. She is married to David Krumholtz. David is an American actor known for playing the role of Charlie Eppes in CBS drama series Numb3rs. IRead More The woman purportedly wearing a hoop stolen from “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” star Kyle Richards ring is going to be appearing on CBS’ “Inside Edition” Monday evening together with her side of the story.Read More Jacque Gray is an American actress. She is known for playing the role of Kathy in Drive Me Crazy, Carolyn Merrill in Brigham City and Riley Sanders in Phobic.She was born in Bountiful, Utah. She belongs to American nationality and his ethnicity is caucasian. There is no much information about her parents and siblings.Jacque Gray is currently single. she was previously in a married relationship to Todd Mitchell in 2005Read More Kaitlin Doubleday is an American actress.She has around 192k followers on Instagram and around 58k followers on Twitter.Kaitlin is a happily marry woman. She got engage to her longtime boyfriend Devin Lucien, a DJ in May 2015 in Paris and tied their knot on May 6, 2016, in Big Sur.Read More Patrick mahomes fiancee brittany matthews expecting a baby girl. Patrick Mahomes and fiancée Brittany Matthews out for baby gender reveal It’s over for Rob Riggle's wife files for divorce.Tiffany Riggle filed for divorce from the comedian, 50, on Oct after 20 years of marriage, Bachelor Nation's Lesley Murphy reveals the sex of her and fiancé Alex Kavanagh's first baby together. Lesley Murphey is happy to announce, "the future is female." Kelly Clarkson hosted the Billboard Music Awards 2020 live from the Dolby Theater in Calif. Know who was named Billboard Music Awards 2020 winners at Wednesday night's show below! Who is John Cena wife? Everything knows about John Cena's wife, married, girlfriend. relationship. John Cena and Shay Shariatzadeh love Nikki Bella is taking a glance back at her experience dancing with Artem Chigvintsev on "DWTS" (Dancing with the Stars) in 2017 Signup for our newsletter to get the latest news, updates and valuable resources delivered directly in your inbox.

When I told Erin Harpe that I love the way she colors outside the lines, she responded by saying, “I don’t even know what the lines are.” On their 2017 VizzTone CD Big Road Erin Harpe’s Delta Swingers jump from Slim Harpo’s Louisiana swamp rock classic “Shake Your Hips to California songwriter Randy Newman’s “Guilty.” There are four originals, Mississippi John Hurt’s Delta chestnut “Frankie,” and the 10-cut album opens with Mississippi Fred McDowell’s “Kokomo.” I thought most of the air had been taken out of that old crowd pleaser when it was re-tinkered as “Sweet Home Chicago.” But she almost convinces me she has just written the song. Fifteen seconds into the cut which opens the album, I’m ready to throw off my shoes and let her take me anywhere for the next 10 songs. And she does! This guitarist/singer/songwriter and band leader has released solo blues albums, won a Boston Music Award in the category of world music, and fronts Lovewhip, an Afro-pop band her fans refused to let her abandon when she formed The Delta Swingers. She credits her husband Jim Countryman who is manager and bass player in her band with channeling her muse. “He’s very interested in music,” she says. “He’s read every music book out there. I’m not a genius, but I’m like a creative genius type off in the clouds. Like, ‘Oh, what day is this?’ You know? But I found out after being married to him for 10 years that I have ADD. It’s like, ‘Oh, ok, now we understand why I’m just so good at focusing on anything musical is that it comes to how are we going to get that UK tour going? He’s a lot better at that than me.” Wikipedia says she switched from flute to guitar when a “love interest” in high school inspired her to learn how to play “Alice’s Restaurant” for a school event. And you know how reliable Wikipedia is. Turns out they were right. “In 12th grade the boy I liked was an actor, and I tried acting, and I couldn’t do anything because I was way too shy and actually a teacher had said to me, ‘Take the flute. You’re not really that great of a singer.’ I was trying to be in the musical, and I was like ‘I’ll show you.’ (My would-be boyfriend) knew all the lyrics to “Alice’s Restaurant,” and I was, ‘Oh, my dad knows that song,’ thinking I can impress him if I go and learn that guitar part, and then we can perform it together. We were gonna perform it at lunch time or something. “So, I went home and said, ‘Dad, you’ve got to teach me the “Alice’s Restaurant” song,’ and he was like, ‘Gee, you haven’t really been playing a lot of guitar, so it could be difficult. I don’t know if you know the finger picking guitar parts in depth. It’s an intermediate song.’ “He started showing it to me, and I just picked it up right away. So, we did the performance and after that it was the guitar for me.” Dad was in a band called Franklin Harpe and Usilton that was a big influence on her blues guitar playing. “Somewhere I have a list of all the songs that he knows. He is fantastic.” Erin grew up in Washington D.C. and met Archie Edwards, John Jackson, Eleanor Ellis and Cephas & Wiggins who played with her father via the Archie’s Barbershop collective. In 2008, she released Delta Blues Duet, her second solo LP including duets recorded with her dad. Her Afro-pop influences stem from a year in Kenya when she was a student at the Quaker run Earlham College. She graduated with a degree in anthropology. “I had wanted to go to Oberlin (in Oberlin Ohio). Every artistic person that I knew wanted to go to Oberlin. I did not make it into Oberlin, and I had friends who were a year ahead of me who said, ‘Oh, you should try Earlham, really cool.’ I grew up Unitarian. So, that (Quaker religion) was not that much different. It’s not a religious school, but I did go to some of the meetings. I thought they were fantastic. You just stood there and annunciated with a group of people, and if you felt like standing up, you stood up and said something. It’s kinda neat. “I also loved they’re also big on peace, peace studies. One of their big things is you can go abroad easily at that school. So, I went to Kenya and did my studies abroad in Kenya. And it was really fantastic. That is why I ended up starting Lovewhip because Lovewhip is originally based around Afro-pop which I learned of when I went to Kenya.” It was small leap from studies in Kenya to winning the 2004 Boston Music Award for World Music Act of the Year with her band Lovewhip especially for a woman with ADD. “I wanted to do a rock band with a lot of influences, but I think what happened was there was a certain authenticity about us. We would always have African guys joining our band. We had a talking drum player for a while. We had a guy who wanted us to change our band’s name to the Love Stars, and he was going to market us in West Africa somewhere. “We just loved this old ’60s, ’70s Afropop, and we loved it so much that I guess we came out sounding kind of authentic even though it was always our own take, but I felt bad because we wanted to be like the Talking Heads as Afro-pop. Or you have the Police with reggae, but they were not a reggae band. “That’s what I was trying to do, but I think at times we were just too authentic without meaning to be, but also Boston didn’t know where to put us. When they started doing the Boston Music Awards, we were up for punk one year. We were up for World Music one year. We were not making it easy for them to put us in a box. The thing I loved about Afro-pop, by the way, was guitar playing, the hybrid picking. When you pick you get a pick in your thumb and forefinger and then you use your other two fingers to pick.” Erin Harpe & the Delta Swingers would go on to win the Boston Blues Challenge in 2010, 2012, 2014 and 2016. They were the 2012 Boston Music Awards Blues Act of The Year in 2012 and were semi-finalists in the Blue Foundation’s International Blues Challenge in 2011, 2013 and 2017. (Lovewhip won a Boston Music Award in 2004) To me Erin is the latest in a long line of Boston-based roots musicians who have in the 50-some years since the Harvard Square folk scare produced great music that mixes the best in traditional influences with strong originals. The home of Berklee College and a hotbed for collegiate players, the town has long percolated with acts stimulated by the environment. But to the rest of the world, the city is much better known for its rock acts like Aerosmith, The Cars, Geils, and the band Boston. “Boston was an influence, but not really on my blues because I lived in D. C. I graduated college and basically I moved to Boston because A. I couldn’t find a job. And B. there just weren’t a lot of venues around that I could find where I could get a gig. When I came to Boston there were open mikes and lots of gigs you could get, but they were just somebody who was just starting out like me. There were more other musicians who were just starting out. I did get some gigs with people in D.C. I just thought it was a fun place and was music friendly.” Johnny D’s in Somerville, Massachusetts a stone’s throw from Rounder Records’ early headquarters was one Boston area club that did make a difference in Erin’s development as an artist. “They closed last year and knocked the old building down. That’s where I saw Susan Tedeschi. She did the blues jam once. I could never play the blues jam because just old-style blues I couldn’t tell you when the changes would be or what they were, so the band could never follow me. “So, the guy that was running it happened to be dating Susan Tedeschi at the time said, ‘Oh, why don’t you just play a couple of songs solo and that’ll be it. ‘Oh, great. Thank you so much,’ because I had no idea how to lead a band or play with a band at that time. After my set, Susan Tedeschi said, ‘Oh, you’re great. Would you like to open for me sometime? Here’s my number.’ And I did not call because I was too shy. (Laugh) I’m like a people person. I love talking to people. Talking to a group of people is a totally different thing.” Erin credits her husband Jim Countryman with developing her into a professional touring musician. He’s the bass player in both Lovewhip and The Delta Swingers. “I met him in his living room. His roommates were friends of mine, and one night after one of his rehearsals I was there with a friend of one of his roommates, and he asked me for my phone number. I wrote it down on a matchbook, and that was it. We have not really spent any time apart since then. “It was almost love at first sight. Jim has really encouraged me to get out there and be in the public eye, starting a band, being a band leader. He’s like my rock. I don’t think I’d be doing this. I might be doing some promo gigs here and there like I was back in the day, but he’s my partner (as an artist) and my manager. I’m the artistic director, visual and musical.” Big Road is Erin’s first self-produced album, and it did not come about without bumps and bruises. “I was going for a live feel. The name Big Road has a lot to do with what I’ve been doing the last few years, just traveling, touring. Our last album (Lovewhip Blues, 2014) was produced by Dave Gross, and I love that album. It’s great, but I feel it didn’t quite capture what we sound like live. So, I wanted to do that, and I also decided I would just do all the guitars myself. So, that was really fun, too. Several songs have the second slide part: “Big Road” and “Stop and Listen.” So, those are the main ones (that were overdubbed). Mostly when I play finger picking style that I do love, I can’t really ever stop. I just thought it would be cool to have another layer.” Her harmonica player Matt “Charles” Prozialeck is her secret weapon on the album and on tour. He has a unique delivery that adds to the energy of the mix. And he saved her butt last year on tour. “We had a slide guitar player (“Sonny Jim Clifford) who was with us. He was amazing, but he just wouldn’t listen to me. Like don’t play here, do play there. Then, this particular guy quit the band when we were on our first seven-week tour in Utah. Some people just aren’t up for touring the way I am. He was really a pain, but some musicians just don’t know what it’s like to tour until they’re out there and then they’re like, ‘This doesn’t work for me.’ So, I’m trying not to have hard feelings about it, but what came out of it was so good. “It was like wait a minute. The three of us that were left on the tour said, ‘Hey, you just be the guitar player.’ I’ve always been very shy, so I shied away from that, but finally in our seventh year of being a band, I’m like, ‘Ok,’ and now finally people are noticing that I’m playing guitar ’cause when there was another guitarist, people were, ‘Oh, look at that soloist. Let’s talk about them.’ “What happened was Sonny quit. We had a couple of days where we were just a trio, and then I was like racking myself. There’s five weeks left on this tour. Who’s going to go on the tour with us and just be the fourth member? We asked all our friends. ‘Oh, I can do two dates.’ ‘Oh, I can do one date.’ Oh, my gosh, we were in trouble. “So, Matt had sat in with us once, and I called him up, and he said, ‘Yes, I am there.’ We’re getting the band together. Caution to the wind. He only knew like 10 of our songs ’cause he just had the one album we did, but yeah, while he was on the tour, he decided to move to Boston, and after he moved here we just worked together. “At first, he was trying to sound like Rosy (Rosenblatt, CEO of Vizztone and former harp player with the band). He’s on my first album. It took us a while to figure out, ok, Matt’s more Chicago style, and he’s got a different thing with his tone. He’s a very young player, but he’s got a lot of knowledge about the blues. “I can’t believe that at his age he knows so much about blues from almost any era. So, basically my favorite thing about him is that he was willing to work with me to make the pieces fit tougher. He wasn’t just going to come in and play over everything like almost every soloist I’ve got. What I was going for is a group sound. I’m not looking to like highlight even myself. This all has to come together as on the early Bonnie Raitt album I love so much, the first two albums.” Check out the cover of Big Road. Erin may be a shy graduate of a Quaker College but she’s got some Bessie Smith in her, too. “The first time we went to South by Southwest I was playing solo acoustic blues and getting a lot of attention. People were there from Europe and started playing my first blues album Blues Roots on the blues shows in Europe. “So, we went back every year, and then one of those years I said, ‘I want to start a band. I was thinking about the feeling I get from my dad’s band. And that’s what I wanted, a Delta blues band and Piedmont blues-based country blues band. And that’s how we started out the band in 2010. So, a lot of our material was from what my dad taught me. In fact everything almost except a few songs that were taught to me by other people like Eleanor Ellis who was another collaborator with my dad, an excellent guitar player and singer who was brought up in Louisiana. “(African American women singers in the 20s) were kinda under the radar, and I guess Bessie Smith was playing to black audiences. Whose gonna say anything if you’re playing at the juke joint? ‘Hey, that’s too risqué!’ “When I did South By Southwest I did this festival called Not Festival South by Southwest. It was at the same time as Southwest, but it was all Americana, and I had taken this Lovewhip song “Virtual Booty Machine” which was kinda crazy. It’s a song written about this thing we did where we set up this screen, and behind it was a light and me and the other girl in the band went back there and stripped down naked and had a light behind us and you could only see our silhouettes, and it was real cool, and that was called the “Virtual Booty Machine.”” Perhaps Erin’s most prestigious credential is the DVD she did for Stefan Grossman’s instructional series on playing blues guitar. “He was looking for somebody to do a Women of the Blues Country Blues DVD, and he was on some on-line forum and he said, ‘Who out here plays Memphis Minnie,’ and I think somebody might have suggested somebody that was a lot more well known than I am and then somebody said, ‘Oh, how about Erin Harpe’ because I’m a huge Memphis Minnie nut. When I first got started, I first (was into) Memphis Minnie. “I’ve listened to Bonnie Raitt for a long time. I don’t know if you can guess that by the (sound of my albums), but I’ve been a big fan of hers since I was a kid so, yeah, she’s one of the people who did it early on and (another woman) I look up to are also Rory Block and Memphis Minnie. I think people are not used to seeing women play the lead. We’ve gotta change that.” Check out Erin’s website at: www.erinharpe.com Interviewer Don Wilcock has been writing about blues for nearly half a century. He wrote Damn Right I’ve Got The Blues, the biography that helped Buddy Guy jumpstart his career in 1991. He’s interviewed more than 5000 Blues artists and edited several music magazines including King Biscuit Time.

How can you make a major life change amidst emotionally charged circumstances and maintain a feeling of healthy, viable sanity? No matter what is changing in your life, there are things that you can do to aid your own resilience to overwhelming stress; to lower “ruminating” or fixating on a problem/breakup and finally, to feel more confident. For 2 months, I have read this article about once a week. I know what I need to do… To let him go. But it just isn’t happening. I want someone to flip the switch and at that point… I am done. No looking back. Any advice on how to get that switch flipped???” Is there such a switch? In a way, the answer is yes. Let’s go a step at a time and focus on a little of what you’re thinking. Here is some mood music that I listen to when I’m thinking….I’m letting go…. - I know what I need to do. Okay, let’s use me as a semi-bad example. When I realized that I was not going to love “him” as my life mate, I also realized that part of me would also love him as the girl I used to be. You see, you’re not letting him go – you don’t have him to turn loose of. You’re letting go of the possible YOU in the future, the one that had hoped it would all work out. Truth is, we let go of the “dream” or possibility that was borne in this relationship. So you know what you NEED to do ~ but do you WANT to do that? And what, specifically, are you planning to let go of? - I want someone to flip a switch. Hmmm. Really? You’d be awfully indebted to that person. I love my sister more than I can imagine describing, but she can’t flip that switch in me – same goes with all the people in my amazing support system. I just got mad at them when they tried. I still find myself defending him (which is so silly.) I bet that when someone really runs your former flame into the ground, you’d get really pissed – even if you don’t want to admit it. The switch is labeled “making my own decision, and I hate doing this.” You’re choosing to cut the ties, do the deed, cancel the hope. That has to be okay in your eyes. Letting totally go is HARD. It’s not innately wired in most women. Here is the hard truth: even when you decide, you’re going to glance back over your shoulder and wonder. That is okay. It’s fine. Keep moving forward, the glancing will become less if you will let it. Yes, we may hold out to the bitter end. Important affirmation for you: Change is in your power, belonging to no one else. You are not lost, stuck or even alone – change is in your power. You hold the keys to the door. You chose when you walk though. You have the ability and the wherewithal to choose. You’re going to have to throw the final curtain. Imagine that switch and what life looks like on the other side of it. Write a letter to the switch puller and spill the beans, all that you’re afraid of. Here’s my example. “I’m not honestly sure that I can do this. There are moments that find myself thinking of something else, anything else. I am me again. I smile, or almost laugh. I can pretend that my clothes aren’t hanging off of me, and that somehow I am okay. The world still makes sense. I reach over to my phone to say hello or look to see what he’s said – and there is nothing there. He’s not there. I get this overwhelming feeling of being locked in a night mare, a super horrible joke that isn’t funny and is killing me. It’s killing me. I found myself on my knees yesterday, hitting the floor with my fist and screaming in pain. It’s been months since we’ve spoken, even longer since I saw him and I still just don’t understand. What if it’s like this forever? What if I never find a way out of the pain?” Again, the ability to affect change lies inside of you. THM is a place where many people share this thought in some way or form. They’re staring at the mirror on the wall, seeing the image of the person they were when all was well. No telling how long ago that had been, or what has happened in the meantime. It is truly important that when we analyze where we are in life and what we want, that we are HONEST. I think that the most important thing I can teach you is that it’s okay to let go of someone you honestly have feelings of love for. In a way, I love my ex. Always have. There is no place in my future for him. I know what we are together, and it’s not healthy for me….and that is what I have to deal with. I am better off without him in my life – even though I love him. I wanted the idea of us…I’d gotten so used to having to fight to survive in our relationship….that I forgot who I was, who I am and who I could be. Important note: Your life is about you. Your life is about you. If you do not care for yourself, be your own best friend, make decisions that aid in your own happiness…you’re going to live an unfulfilled life. You’re going to model being unhappy to others. It’s time to take control of that most powerful thing you own…your heart and mind. I am not saying be a selfish butt – that’s just wrong. Do follow what you know to be right for you. That isn’t going to include someone that doesn’t want to be there, or can’t fit into what you really need in life. Square pegs and round holes…make for a messy life. The switch flips when you realize that YOU’RE STILL HERE. I can’t stress enough that you’ve got to stop hating the person that you’re leaving behind and just accept it for what it is. Maybe I am the psychotic leech that he called me. I sure as hell hope not. Even though it hurt my feelings, even though I had myself tested with every psych test my clinic could throw at me….I have to come to the conclusion that I am okay with him being a permanent part of the new me…but not a present part of my life. I don’t have to have him in my forefront….he’s my past. I understand that. Even if I were single tomorrow…he’s my past. I don’t want to live in the past. I don’t want the pain that we knew, even if the love is there. too. I can’t go back now. All things being the same, would you want a version of your past that has GROWN in its normative state? Would you want more chaos and turmoil, more drama and stupidity? No. Even given the chance to return, I made my decision – and it’s that I don’t want him, no matter the cost. It’s not anything about him, it’s about me. I choose to live out my dreams and to do that with dignity and honor. If you are, hold you breath, jump into the cold water of being certain and simply Let It Go. It’s ….f**king hard. Your life is more than this drama – someone that doesn’t love you enough work it through, to make it into the hard times and past the grey of just not knowing what the hell is going to happen in life. That is okay. When you’re okay in the questions…you’ve made progress. it’s okay that he/she is with someone else. Who gives a rip? You’ve already been through the hell…want to really go back? No. It’s there for someone else to experience with them. Let them be happy without hating them for it. Let them be whatever – miserable, happy, sad…without being involved. It’s no longer your problem. What is your REAL problem? You need to find your own paradise. How do you find out if that is true for you? On the day that I honestly thought about marrying him as he asked – and later denied – I have to admit that I sat on my steps, crying into the phone, realizing that I was about to make the biggest mistake of my life. Yes, marrying him would have been the stupidest thing I would have ever done. I knew in my heart of hearts that this was not the life for me – and in my emotion, I was to scared to admit that it was not an all consuming kind of lifetime love. At the end of the day, knowing all that you know – are you really ready to jump off the cliff and KNOW that he’s/she’s going to be there when you need them? It’s just reality. Here is an important part to know, though. If you’re trying to tell yourself all the bad things that he/she did for you to leave them, you’re actually reinforcing your dedication to them. Yes, that is what I said. If you’re engaging in negative speak over your former love, you’re delaying your own progress. Even if your ex was a blithering idiot, you didn’t see them that way. Ask any woman about their man (or vise versa) and you’ll get a litany of things. In our ex’s, it’s a little more tricky. You’re having to see what was good through all the things that made you want to let go in the first place. It’s like being snow blind. My ex? I know what I saw in him – and I was almost the only one that saw it. I probably still am. That is okay – you see, I loved him so very much. Just because I let go doesn’t mean that I hate the guy. I just don’t want to be “his,” nor is he interested in my being in his life. So why did it take the both of us over a year to stop longing for one another? (Yes, stupidity is an answer, but not the right one.) - Fear of being alone. - Fear of finding out they were “the one.” (PS – there is no “the one.”) - Fear of new relationships. - Feeling connected to a person that you want to be separate from. - Feeling like no one else understands you like they do. - Feeling like no one else will physically entrance you like they do. - Solid soul ties. - Soul ties that you’re not willing to let go of. - Soul ties that they’re not willing to let go of. - Inability to deal with soul ties though visualization and self expression. - Ruminating on the loss….constantly. - Talking about them, and only them. - Talking about them…constantly. Boot Camp for Switch Flipping If – notice I said IF – you’re ready and willing to let go, here are the steps that I put myself through. Please read the second half of the Secondhand Love article on soul ties for the exercise. - Each day, begin with centering meditation. Clear your mind and come to a conscious decision that today is a growth day for you. Take care of your emotions and let all of the cloudy feelings be expressed in breathing. Let your pain float into the universe. Imagine that you are cleaned from the inside out. - Write your physical and emotional needs on a paper. Fold the paper and place it in a safe location at your home or in your bag. Allow your needs to be contained there. If thoughts of him/her overwhelm, write them down at they come to you. Again, place those needs in a little baggie or a safe place. You can address them later. - Make a bargain with yourself to laugh. Read a book, see a movie, go to the gym. Get out and around. Talk to people – not about your ex. You will feel hollow at first. Just keep doing it. - Make a bucket list filled with hope. Start to take steps toward fulfilling a dream. Okay – we’re all adults here. Do NOT make that bucket list about doing things that the two of you wanted to do. I said you and I meant it. - Confront the past. I went to all the places that he and I had been. The first lunch and the first kiss. The first everything. I cried, and saw that the places were empty. I look little stones from my meditation place with me, and left that part of me behind. I returned the love to the universe, and withdrew my part in it. - Exercise self control. Redirect your thoughts, your speech and your actions away from the person that you’re leaving – or imagining those scenarios. Take your power back. Make your own decisions. - At the end of the day, return to your meditation and think about those needs you wrote. Did you fulfill them? Acknowledge them, and give yourself permission and dignity to fulfill them for yourself. - Tell the truth, every day. For me, that was going to see a counselor with a PhD in psychology. I didn’t make excuses, and I won’t. There is no “he said, she said…” I don’t participate. The past is the past and I will not forsake my future in it’s murky image. I make a decision to tell the truth to myself every day……including the part where I thought that I was going to simply die of a broken heart. I didn’t. I am fine now. Yes, even now, there are days that I am lonely – and I tell myself the truth about that. I developed an even stronger support network of people who are honestly in this for life. I am allowed to miss the good times but not to blow them out of proportion. I am allowed to be mad at him for being such a total ass…but I can’t blow that out of proportion, either. Tell the truth. Hard things that are permanent switch flippers: - Are you willing to let go? - Are you okay with life as you don’t know it yet? - Do you feel a sense of hope and joy about what is to come? Why or why not? - Can you feel yourself begin to imagine a real love with someone that isn’t a person you wanted to break up with? - Can you imagine the tie between you fading? Will you let it? - If I said – “he’s fine, he’s gone on an honestly wishes you the best. He’s not coming back.” What do you feel? - Who is keeping this alive for you? - What are you doing to feel this feeling? Be honest. - What are you doing to find and flip the switch? Be honest. In closing, I am posting something that I really did write in my journal that you all have not seen before. It’s edited, but the jist of it is still there. “I woke up this morning and the sun had come out. I can’t believe that the time has passed so quickly by when it used to take a year to live a day. I made it all the way north before I realized that I hadn’t thought of you at all. I didn’t. Now as I sit here in a space you used to be, it doesn’t matter so much that you’re gone. I’m watching my friends talk, and the world spin, and no one cares that you’re not here. Outside of me, there is no vacant space you left behind. Hardest to realize is that I am pretty full now too. It’s lunchtime, our time, and I have no idea where you are. More important, I know where I am. I am happy where I am. It’s okay that I miss you…I don’t miss me now that you’re not here. No more pain. No more drama.” Learn something new. Scream into the wind. Be REALLY alive, just for you. I encourage you, challenge you..dare you even. Go make a difference. You’re still here. Make. It. Count.

The Game Changer (The Perfect Game, #2) by J. Sterling Jack appeared at my door last night after six months of no communication wearing a Mets jersey and holding a dozen red roses. He told me he was sorry, that he loved me, and that he would earn my trust again. It took everything in me to not fall apart at the mere sight of him. I wanted to take him back into my life, but I needed to know that this time it would be forever… In J. Sterling’s highly anticipated follow-up to her USA Today bestselling novel The Perfect Game, Jack and Cassie quickly realize that their new lifestyle can often be cruel and unforgiving. Their happiness is put to the test as the past is never truly far behind. How do you stay together when the world's trying to tear you apart? Kelly - 4 Crowns “Being with him, no matter how illogical it seemed considering he was responsible for my internal carnage, completed me. We made sense together. Melissa couldn’t have been more right when she described us as ‘the perfect mess.’ I realised her assessment held more truth now that it ever had before.” - Cassie Andrews ”People spend their lives searching for their one true love, their other half. I found mine in college, dancing in a fraternity house driveway. Lucky for me, she found me right back.” - Jack Carter The Game Changer is the perfect title for this book, as a new game is now in play… Welcome to the BIG LEAGUES. It may sound glamorous, but J. Sterling proves that actually…it’s not all what it’s cracked up to be. In this book we reconnect with Jack and Cassie as they rediscover the love they believed to be lost. This story held many redeeming qualities for both characters, especially Jack, as he comes back to reclaim his girl and make amends after making the biggest mistake of his life. It has been six months since she saw him. Six months of feeling incomplete and unable to move on, her only reprieve is her new job in magazine photography. Cassie loves New York, so when Jack turns up on her doorstep, trending a METS baseball shirt and begging Cassie for forgiveness, she is surprised, relieved…and wary. How can she ever trust him, again? When he relives his tale of the last six months, it’s a bitter pill to swallow. Cassie, in these scenes, is an absolute hero! I don’t know how she managed to keep it together and it made me realise how much her character had grown. Gone was the starry-eyed, love struck college student, and in its place a woman who needed answers and would stop at nothing until she got them. I was so proud of her in these moments. Jack’s voice is honest, his pain heartfelt and believable. I wanted to punch him in The Perfect Game for what he did to Cassie, yet in this book, he rekindled my love for him ten-fold; his story provided an ideal injection of anticipation and angst, without being too OTT. Now for my reservations… Jack's voice was stronger in this sequel, yet, at the same time it I felt it missed some of the magic of the first book. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I loved the first book more. The Game Changer felt like a series 'filler' more so than a full novel in its own right. I'm not saying this is necessarily a bad thing, I just expected further progression on from the Epilogue in book one. This storyline, although highly enjoyable, was slightly predicable. Still… the passion between Cassie and Jack is scorching and the trials of being the girlfriend of a famous ' athlete' made for an interesting diversion and tested both Cassie and Jack's strength of character. Both of which have grown exponentially! The main focus of this story is fame. Just when you think they have their perfect reunion, notoriety throws a spanner in the works when all eyes are on the new METS pitcher and his life, including the ‘love of’, become public property number one. With mistakes come repercussions and his one has just decided to cash in on the media money-train, pushing Jack and Cassie to the brink of destruction. Can their love survive the story-hungry tabloids (however untrue), paparazzi and hate-filled social media sites? Well that remains to be seen. My advice to you: READ IT!

Home Blog About Facebook Instagram Apple Podcasts Stitcher Google Podcasts Spotify S1E6: One Woman Band with Jess Arms Jess Arms . . .Read More Jess Arms talks about her adventurous and alternative lifestyle, and fills us in on what it takes to make a living playing music while backpacking the world. Traveling solo can be a frightening prospect. Especially for women. On the road, however, we’ve met some incredible women who are blazing their own trail without fear. Here’s the story of one amazing lady who travels alone and pays her way by playing music around the world. Everyone should be able to freely roam this planet without concern for their safety. Unfortunately, the stark reality is that an added element of danger exists for female travelers. And while it’s certainly important to be aware and alert, wherever you are in the world, it’s of equal importance to not let the possibility of a negative outcome impede you from living a life that you love. That’s why it’s so important to me to share the story of my friend Jessie Arms. Jess is one of the most fearless and adventure-loving humans I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, and she’s been traveling solo for much of the last decade. A seeker of all things epic, Jess is constantly on the search for the next hike, the next dive, or the next wave. Growing up in the suburbs of Baltimore, Maryland, Jess always felt the call of an alternative lifestyle, particularly one rooted in nature. She pursued a degree in Parks and Recreation Management in Maryland and completed a Wilderness Emergency Medical Technician certification in Yosemite, California. In her early 20s Jess did everything from leading youth treks in the mountains of Wyoming to working on sailboats in the Carribean. She even organized a bicycle ride for charity across the United States, more than once! And not just east to west, but north to south as well. As she continued her adventures, it was the wonders of the ocean that truly enchanted her. The next decade would see Jess spend as much time below the sea as above it, as she pursued her scuba dive master certification and became a PADI-certified dive instructor, working for conservation-minded companies across the world. Randall and I met Jess during the Covid-19 lockdown in Sri Lanka, where she had been supporting herself as a solo musician—it was actually the first time we had been around another American for nearly two months. While our shared nationality brought us close, it was our shared love for music that truly made us feel at home together. I think most musicians (back in the US, at least) would agree that it’s hard to make a living playing music. During our conversation with Jess, she shared her experiences playing gigs around Sri Lanka, including how much money one can make performing, how much work it takes, what kind of gear is required, and more. We recorded this episode of Switch the Flip on one of our many excursions together, this time at the top of a tea plantation nearly 7,000 meters high. Dive into this episode of Switch the Flip to hear why Jess Arms is a true one-woman band. Jess has done it all. She’s cycled across America (twice), worked as a dive instructor, played music and surfed around the world, and worked on sailboats in the Caribbean. Most impressive, perhaps, is that she has never had any social media. Randall had a good run at the corporate life (Blizzard Entertainment), but a series of devastating personal losses made him realize that NOW is the only time to live. Through music, yoga, surfing, and travel, he’s since been able to craft a life that’s anything but ordinary An impromptu trip to India in 2015 illuminated Siler’s path, lighting the way to Alaska, Hawaii, and Southeast Asia. As his personal practice deepened, Yoga revealed itself as the natural outlet for all of his creative energies and ignited a passion to share with the world.

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Hi, I’m Mary, and this is my column no one asked for about things I like! Like most New Yorkers, I have places scattered around the city that I like to pop into when I have time to kill. Unlike many New Yorkers, most of mine are corporate chains because it’s easier to browse without anyone noticing you aren’t buying anything. While I realize I should spend more time wandering around, say, independent bookstores, I don’t trust myself to leave without spending $50 on books I could have bought for $10 on Amazon (used! Amazon is an evil corporate giant but at least I’m trying! Kind of). I often think about ducking into a coffee shop to read when I have free time, but I’m writing this from a cafe where I managed to spend $8.50 on a 12 oz. bottle of (unflavored) seltzer and a tiny bag of Hippeas, which I love but have a stockpile of at home. What I’m saying is that I can barely afford to be in public. LOL! The first place I usually go when I have time to kill is Whole Foods. It’s a pleasant place to spend time, especially when it’s hot out because it’s basically a giant walk-in refrigerator. There’s almost always something small I need to buy there, whether it’s soap or probiotics or flaxseed meal (pro grocery shopper tip: fancy stuff, like almond butter, is usually cheapest at Whole Foods). My favorite thing to buy there is corn nuts, a.k.a. quicos, but that’s another story for another time. If I can’t think of anything I need at Whole Foods — which is happening more frequently since a Whole Foods 365 opened down the street from my apartment and rocked my world — I go to Sephora, that glittering warehouse of performed femininity. I know Sephora, more than perhaps any other company, feeds female insecurity for the sake of capitalism, but I fucking love it. I first discovered Sephora when I was in high school, during one of my bi-annual trips to the Crossgates Mall in beautiful (JK) Albany, NY. I had just started wearing makeup, which I purchased at my local Rite Aid and applied to my face with the precision of an abstract impressionist with a tremor. The first time I walked into Sephora, I was both overwhelmed and mesmerized. It felt like the store was a giant compact of shimmery eyeshadow which was, at the time, something I loved to smear all over my face. I wanted everything and bought nothing because I couldn’t afford it and wouldn’t have known what to do with it anyway. In college I began shopping at Sephora — a little eyeliner here, an overpriced nail polish there — and after graduation I started buying all my cosmetics there, which may sound extravagant but wasn’t since I wore almost no makeup. When, a few years after college, I (finally!) moved to New York, my office was located in a mall, which included both a Sephora and a Whole Foods. On the (rare) occasion I had both the time and motivation to leave my desk, I’d go to one of these stores and wander around. On my most depressed days, I’d go to Sephora. Despite the fact that it’s always crowded and by definition chaotic, stepping into a Sephora brings me great comfort. I think part of it is the promise that all these thousands of products can not only make me look, but feel better. I’m smart enough to know this is a mostly empty promise but vain enough to hold out just a little bit of hope that a new eye cream will change everything. The other reason Sephora brings me peace is that it’s a place where you’re not only allowed, but encouraged to loiter. Going to Sephora isn’t about shopping — it’s about the experience…which will hopefully end in shopping. It’s a place where women are supposed to wander aimlessly so they can discover special little treasures that are absolutely guaranteed to improve the appearance of their skin for the bargain price of $69.99. I like Sephora because when a saleswoman asks if I’m looking for anything in particular and I say no, she nods knowingly and walks away without any further questions. I go there when I have time to kill because it’s a place full of women absolutely slaughtering entire afternoons. Sephora is a great place to waste time because any time spent at Sephora is time wasted. A few months ago, I had a lot of time to kill. I don’t remember exactly why, but I kept finding myself in Manhattan with an hour or so to spare, so I made lots of visits to Sephora. On one such afternoon, I wandered into the fragrance section. I’ve been wearing the same scent for probably close to a decade: Burberry Brit. When I had a steady job, I put on a little dab every morning, but since I started freelancing (walking dogs), I realized smelling good is a luxury I can’t afford, at least not every day, so I now use my perfume sparingly. The day I wandered back to the fragrance section was a day I’d decided to save a few pennies and go scentless, so I decided to apply a sample spritz of something fancy. I was immediately drawn to a little section of sleek-looking perfumes by a brand called Commodity. They were all unisex (tres chic!) and I gave several a sniff. I really liked the smell of one, so I sprayed it on my wrists. For the rest of the day, my nose was glued to my wrists, huffing in the sweet (but not too sweet!) scent of my new obsession. I went back to Sephora shortly thereafter to apply my new favorite scent, but I couldn’t remember which Commodity fragrance I’d put on before. I sprayed a few on scent sticks, but I still couldn’t figure it out. Finally, I decided it must have been Vetiver, so I sprayed it on. It was not Vetiver. A few days later, after a doomed mammogram appointment (they told me I was too young and that my titties were too dense for them to perform the procedure. It was flattering but mortifying), I slunk into the very same Sephora I used to hide in on breaks from my office job and once again tried to find the scent I’d fallen in love with. This time, I decided it was Bergamot. It was not Bergamot. Then I thought maybe it was Wool and sprayed that all over me too. It was not Wool. It took a few more trips for me to finally decide the fragrance which had so enthralled me was Gold. I was thrown off because one of the keynotes listed was vanilla, which is normally so overpowering. The hint of vanilla in this particular eau de parfum, however, is subtle. The scent is warm and comforting and completely intoxicating and, not to brag, totally works with my body chemistry. I can’t afford it, of course. As far as perfume goes, it’s not absurdly expensive (at $105, it’s certainly not cheap either), but I can barely afford the seltzer I’m drinking right now, so my beloved Commodity fragrance remains a fantasy, a memory of a scent I’ve had the pleasure of inhaling a few times, and which I’ll have the pleasure of smelling once again, the next time I find myself in Manhattan with time to kill. Actually, there’s a Sephora across the street from my therapist’s office, so once a week, I have the opportunity to smell like the woman I aspire to be. I’m relatively new to therapy, however, and spending an hour in the middle of the day talking about myself still feels a little self-indulgent, so the idea of going across the street to treat myself afterward seems downright extravagant. One of these days I might though. As a cosmetics company (not sold at Sephora!) once said, I should do it “because I’m worth it.” As always, I’d like to clarify that this is NOT a sponsored post. I received nothing for it and am pretty sure no one cares that I fucking love Sephora. Still, if anyone is reading and ever wants to give me literally anything for free, Commodity Eau de Parfum in Gold or not, I WILL TAKE IT!!!!!! Anyway, I hope this was helpful. I’ll be back with more unsolicited recommendations soon!

Dear Abby: A friend of mine lost her husband a couple of years ago. I didn’t think she was looking for love or companionship, but all of a sudden she has met a younger man, and I’m concerned. I have observed several red flags, but I’m not sure if I should say something. She owns a home in a big city and another smaller, very nice one with a view of the lake in a resort town three hours away. This man has posted on his main Facebook page a picture of “his” new cabin. (I don’t have any details regarding who else was there.) I looked at his Facebook pictures and saw one of his daughter, who looks to be around 13, along with several pictures of a woman I assume to be his beautiful significant other posing with him and his daughter. On my friend’s birthday, he showed up at her door with a huge bouquet, balloons and all. She called a mutual friend about the flowers and was all giddy. This scenario makes me suspect he’s a predator who may start asking her for money. What, if anything, should I do? — Friend Seeing Signs Dear Friend: If it were me, I’d ask my friend how she enjoyed the family party at her lake house — and whether she has seen what this new man in her life has posted about it on his FB. I would tell her how seeing his claim that the place is “his” made you do a double-take. After that, I would simply listen. Dear Abby: My mother-in-law, “Gladys,” was never a particularly good mother as her kids were growing up. We don’t get along very well. She interjects herself into every aspect of my family’s life, especially when some sort of crisis happens. Most recently, it concerned the death of my wife’s father’s second wife. Gladys actually parked her truck in front of ours to prevent us from going to give him emotional support. When she acts like this, my wife refuses to stand up to her. This woman has more than once come between me and my family. How should I confront her and my wife about this? I feel like Gladys had her chance, but now it is my place to call the shots. Am I being unreasonable? — Husband And Dad In Georgia Dear Husband: I don’t think you are being unreasonable. I do think you need to have a serious, private conversation with your wife. You both need to learn how to set firm boundaries for her mother. If you need help doing that, consult a marriage counselor. A marriage in which one spouse feels sidelined is headed for trouble. Dear Readers: At sundown, the first night of Passover begins. This Jewish holiday celebrates a momentous event in Jewish history — the liberation of the Jewish people from slavery in Egypt. Happy Passover to all who observe. — Love, Abby Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips and was founded by her mother,Pauline Phillips.Contact Dear Abby at P.O.Box 69440,Los Angeles,CA 90069 or visit

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The medical doctor, Dr. Price, investigates because he is suspicious of Charlie’s story and his injuries. The Coast Guard finds Ashley’s body. There is water in her lungs, indicating that she drowned. She was also beaten severely before she was thrown overboard. Her clothes have track pieces embedded in them, indicating she was pushed against the track as she was beaten and hit on the head. The scratches on Charlie’s face match the wedding ring on her hand. Charlie is arrested and found guilty of 2nd degree murder. He is sentenced to life in prison without parole. In various parts of this episode, it’s pointed out that Ashley drew attention from guests by exercising in public. It is also pointed out that she married Charlie rather quickly having only known him for nine months. This is victim blaming and it’s wrong. As the series goes on, the victim blaming gets worse. Shelly is a 43 year old economics professor from Olympia, Washington taking a cruise with her ex-husband Will from Seattle to Vancouver, British Columbia. They divorced in March of 2010, but live together for the sake of their nine year-old son. Shelly divorced Will for cheating on her multiple times. So Will booked the cruise with the intent of winning Shelly back. Their cruise begins with hope, but that soon changes when Shelly prefers gambling in the casino to walking the decks with Will. She makes a male friend in the casino which further disappoints Will. On November 21, 2012 near Vancouver, British Columbia, a passenger named Linda Stewart sees Shelly in a scuffle with someone and then thrown overboard; she reports it to the captain. Here’s where the description of what happened gets confusing. Will claims when Shelly was having fun gambling, he went to their cabin to sleep. Later she came in and asked him for a loan. He refused. So she left and went back to gambling. Then she disappears. After he is questioned a third time, he claims Shelly was suicidal and tried killing herself. He attempted to stop her and she fell and hit her head, killing her. He was afraid their son would be left with no parents if he went to prison so he dumped her body overboard. Will is arrested in their next port, Seattle. Meanwhile the Coast Guard finds her body. The autopsy shows she was badly beaten and there is water in her lungs. She drowned. So she was alive when Will threw her overboard. Will is found guilty of 2nd degree murder. The victim blaming in this episode is pretty bad. Shelly divorced Will because he was cheating. The commentators and narrator say she only thought he was cheating and destroyed their marriage because of it which led to her murder. :0 Really??? No last names were given for Shelly or Will. And like all of the episodes, no cruise ships are named either. Sadie is a college student studying in Hong Kong. She particularly likes her Asian History professor who invites her to come with his family on a cruise from Hong Kong to Baltimore which takes 24 days. She agrees. Although he has to fly back to the United States, Sadie accompanies his wife Mila and their daughter Caitlin. Sadie does the family’s laundry. She also does other guests’ laundry to make extra money. This is how she meets people. One of these guests is Decker, a married man with whom she begins an affair only she doesn’t know he’s married. One day around the third week of the cruise, Mila sees a man arguing with Sadie outside her cabin. He leaves and Sadie goes inside crying. Sadie doesn’t come to dinner and they are dining with the Captain, so the ship’s purser Nathan orders someone to go check her room. That person hears her crying inside, but she doesn’t come to the door. Hours later, the purser himself goes to the room and goes inside. There’s no sign of Sadie but the deck door is open. The captain orders a search and when she’s not found he begins investigating. Captain Norris also orders her room sealed. They are docked in Savannah, Georgia’s harbor when a body washes up on shore. The girl is badly beaten and drowned. In fact, she is so badly beaten her entire upper body is covered in bruises. Meanwhile the ship moves onto Baltimore, its destination. Two Baltimore detectives come on board to investigate and immediately single out Decker after finding Sadie’s diary in her cabin. Decker claims they had a short affair but it ended well between them. Her diary says otherwise. Decker also mentions she was pregnant. She was not. But that’s a big motive to kill her, especially since he’s a newlywed. Decker is arrested and tried, but found innocent by an all male jury. Sadie’s last name is never given. One of the comments made by J. H. Moncrieff during this episode is that 90% of all deaths aboard cruise ships are murders, although cruise lines claim they are suicides. If they are suicides they don’t have to investigate and they keep their reputations. The victim in this episode is a middle-aged man, Jacob Enns, who has spent his life getting rich and controlling everything around him. But he has no friends, only a brother. He’s essentially a bully. He sells his armored car business and makes a fortune, so he invites his brother Peter to go on a cruise with him to the Bahamas where he intends on spending money on the Nassau gambling tables. Jacob is an avid gambler. Peter can’t go so Jacob resorts to inviting his two best friends from college, Hector and Mason. Because Jacob pays for their tickets, he expects Hector and Mason to be his companions for the entire cruise and, since they can’t afford the same things Jacob can, this creates friction between the three. It soon becomes obvious that Jacob expects them to sit and watch him gamble. They don’t. They go have fun. Meanwhile Jacob becomes extremely sea sick and visits the ship’s doctor who prescribes pills and recommends fresh air. Jacob gives the ship’s purser $10,000 to put in the safe along with some of his gold jewelry and possessions. He tells the purser to give it all to his brother if something happens to him. He goes on deck for the fresh air and disappears. The captain orders a complete search of the ship. No body is ever recovered. Jacob’s brother Peter meets the ship at Nassau and comes aboard to find Jacob. There’s blood on the inside of Jacob’s bag, clear signs of foul play, but the captain won’t call it a murder investigation. Instead, the investigator rules it a suicide and refuses to let Peter take Jacob’s belongings. So Peter conducts his own investigation, questioning guests and crew. When that gets nowhere he calls the Florida police. They can’t do anything (maritime law gives them no jurisdiction) and suggest he call the FBI. So he does. The FBI come aboard and give Peter Jacob’s belongings. The purser, who Peter suspected of Jacob’s murder, didn’t take anything. Peter tracks down Mason and questions him. He had an alibi. But Hector was alone that night and very nervous. On August 15, 2013 in Cedarpoint, Ohio, Hector is finally tracked down by the FBI and arrested. He confesses to killing Jacob. He gets life in prison. He killed Jacob for $10,000 that Jacob won in gambling at the casino. That’s all. There are several places in this episode where the commentary is infuriating. Many men, especially white men, hit 45 or 50 and suddenly feel they haven’t accomplished anything in their life. It’s often referred to as male menopause. Quite often they murder someone else or themselves out of frustration. This is a known phenomenon and when they kill their family, they are called family annihilators. They don’t mention this at all and never point out that Jacob had to buy friends to accompany him because he’s such a bully. Betsy Mayer is a 55 year old teacher from Scagway, Alaska. She’s happily married to Bart Mayer, who started out as a teacher, went on to become superintendent, and is now a U.S. marshal. They have two daughters. When Betsy’s family in Wisconsin has a family reunion, she decides to take a cruise on the Great Lakes before attending. She goes alone and takes her expensive vintage jewelry collection including her pearl necklace which she always wears. Almost immediately she notices some of her jewelry is stolen and she suspects her night maid, Amanda Wilson. Not wanting to worry her husband, she doesn’t tell him and decides to catch the thief herself. The next night she disappears. Meanwhile, a fisherman on the shore of Lake Erie finds Betsy’s washed up body. On board the ship no one has reported her missing. And eventually ALL of her jewelry is stolen from her room. Terrified that something has happened to his wife, Bart begins making phone calls. At the same time, Betsy’s dinner companions get worried when she doesn’t join them for several days. They report her missing to the captain who finds her jewelry all gone and a lone pearl on the floor of her cabin. He questions her night maid, Amanda Wilson. Amanda has a long list of convictions for theft. The captain has Amanda’s room searched and finds Betsy’s jewelry in her bag. At the same time Bart flies to Cleveland to look at the body and discovers it is Betsy. Her rings are missing and later found in Amanda’s bags. Amanda confesses to killing Betsy when her theft was interrupted. No details are given on her trial or sentence. The idiot cruise ship that didn’t bother checking her for a criminal record is not mentioned either. This is one of the most disturbing cases. Anna Doppler is a 20 year old college student from Germany working on an Alaskan cruise for the summer with her two friends, Sophia and Charlotte. Tracy is another banquet server on the ship who is also Anna’s roommate. She hates that Anna is always on her phone and too friendly with the guests, so she tries to get her fired. When that doesn’t work she unplugs her phone so she won’t be able to use it. The next day Anna leaves her phone charging on the ship and goes shopping in Anchorage with Charlotte and Sophia. Meanwhile Tracy visits her pervert uncle and tells him all about Anna and her phone. Unaware that Anna has no phone, and after a long day of shopping, Sophia and Charlotte return to the ship without her because she wants to keep shopping. She later gets a ride with someone and is never seen again. When Anna doesn’t show for her shift that night, Sophia and Charlotte report her missing. The captain calls Anchorage Police Department who begin searching Anchorage for her. The ship leaves without her and goes onto the next port, Seattle The FBI board the ship in Seattle. Rather quickly they hone in on Tracy. Meanwhile they find June 28, 2016 CCTV footage of Anna in Anchorage with a 45 year old bailiff named Eddie Sambarg. The police search Samburg’s apartment and discover that he is an avid hunter and he’s also Tracy’s uncle. When they take his computer they find all kinds of violent pornography on it including rape porn. When they question him he says he was at his cabin in the state park nearby, so the FBI searches the cabin and finds a fresh grave nearby. (Note the police searched his home and the FBI searched his cabin.) Sambarg confesses to murdering Anna, claiming he only intended on raping her but had to kill her in self defense. He tells them her body is buried near the cabin, the freshly dug grave they found. When the police searched Eddie’s house they found a wheelbarrow and shovel in Eddie’s pickup, things you normally never see. This shows premeditation. Why take the wheelbarrow on his way to pick up Anna unless he intended on killing her? After killing Anna he left her body in the wheelbarrow for 24 hours before burying her. Eddie is found guilty of manslaughter (accidental murder) and sentenced to 17 years in prison, not nearly enough for what he did. This was another episode with a lot of victim blaming. She’s blamed for not checking that her phone was plugged in, for leaving the ship without a phone, for letting Sophia and Charlotte leave without her, and for taking a ride with a strange man. But Eddie was Tracy’s uncle and probably showed her a photo of Tracy, proving it. Then Anna would get in the car with him. Why do the victims get blamed for the perverse actions of men who are violent toward women? This one will haunt you and want you to never take a cruise. On March 21, 1998, the Bradley family of Chesterfield, Virginia takes a cruise from Puerto Rico to the Caribbean. Ron Bradley’s employer gave it as a gift to their family. Ron and Iva bring their two kids, 23 year old Amy and their son Brad. Amy is a multi-sport athlete and quickly draws the attention of many of the ship’s staff. Of the ship’s male staff who approach Amy (something they are never supposed to do), the waiter and bass player are the most aggressive and are friends with each other. No one on board the ship warns the Bradleys that the Caribbean traffics in kidnapped white women. (Think of the movie Taken only on a ship.) On March 23, their third night, the family goes to the club for Calypso night. Ron and Iva retire to their room first, leaving Brad and Amy dancing. Then Brad and Amy go to their room. At 4:15 am, Brad and Amy are sitting on the balcony talking then he goes to bed. At 5:15 am he wakes and sees her still sitting there. Twenty minutes later when he wakes Amy is gone. Her cigarettes and lighter are the only things missing. Brad wakes Ron and they search for Amy. She is nowhere to be found. So they report her missing to the captain. On most cruise ships, reports of missing passengers are given little attention because the cruise lines are run by corporations who worry about stock prices. If passengers discover someone has been kidnapped or murdered on a cruise ship, they tell everyone and the stock price plummets. So there is almost always an active coverup of kidnapping and murder aboard cruise ships. That’s what happens here. The captain tells the parents he’s searched the ship every nook and cranny when he didn’t. Then he lets the passengers disembark in Curacao, a port with a huge sex trafficking hub. The parents keep searching the ship and while searching, the bass player approaches Brad and tells him he’s sorry that Amy is missing. No one on the ship knows yet that Amy is missing. How did he know? When they can’t find her, the captain convinces them that he’s thoroughly searched the ship (he hasn’t) and talks them into getting off the ship in Curacao to look for her. So they do. The ship leaves without them. When they receive no cooperation and are told lies by everyone they call the FBI. Then they discover the captain lied. The ship wasn’t searched at all. So they fly to the next port and reboard the ship with the FBI. Two college girls approach them telling them they saw Amy that morning with the bass player. Also, the ship’s photographer, who takes photos during the trip and posts them in the ship’s gallery, has noticed all the photos of Amy are missing. The FBI also learn that the videographer, Chris Fenwick, had video of Amy dancing with the bass player in the club that morning right before she disappeared. He refused to give this video or any other video to the FBI. It will be a year and take his brother convincing him before he’ll give it to the FBI. The bass player is given a polygraph. We’re not told the results, so why bother telling us? Ron, Iva, and Brad go home and launch a social media search for Amy. Several months later, they fly to Curacao to look for her. A cab driver approaches them and tells them he saw her that day get off the ship with several men. Then he tells them the three places in Curacao to look for her where they traffic in kidnapped women. But the family is sidetracked when Brad hears Amy’s voice and chases after a white van. She’s not in there. They go home without checking those three places. A year later, a Canadian businessman is diving on the beach in Curacao when Amy approaches him followed by two large thugs. They grab her and lead her away before she can speak to him. When he gets home, he sees her on TV and realizes she’s a kidnap victim. So he flies to Chesterfield and talks to Ron and Iva. He identifies Amy’s tattoos. It was definitely her. No one else knew about those tattoos. A private investigator, Frank Jones, scams the Bradleys into giving him $100,000 to bring Amy home. He shows them photos that are supposed to be Amy and claims to know where she is. Ron’s old boss, the man who bought them the tickets, feels guilty and pays the $100,000, but he also hires a second private investigator, Tim Buckles, to check on the first (Jones). They quickly discover Jones is a fraud and is using their money for his vacation. The photos were models and the tattoos were faked with paint. In 2002, the FBI call them. In 1999, a naval officer was in a brothel in Curacao when Amy approached him and begged for help. He did nothing because being in a brothel would have lost him his stripes. He waited three years to report it. By then the brothel had burned down and no one had seen Amy in three years. In 2005, the Bradleys receive an anonymous email with a link to an adult website. One of the women featured, “Jaz”, is Amy. That same year, a woman on vacation in Curacao, hears several men yelling at a woman in the bathroom where she is peeing. She waits until the men leave before coming out of her stall then asks Amy if she needs help. Before Amy can answer three large men come in, grab Amy, and leave. The woman returns to the U.S., calls the FBI, and gives them a description of Amy and the three men. Amy has unique green eyes which are described in each of these encounters. Amy has never been found, but imagine being kidnapped at 23 years old and forced into sex work for 21 years. That will give you nightmares. Her parents and brother say repeatedly that she had a bad feeling from the moment she stepped onto the cruise ship. But they didn’t leave. I’m sure now they wish they had. Sarah Stevens and James McCloud meet in a bar and strike up a conversation. A few short weeks later they move in together. Then they win a cruise to the Gulf Coast of Florida. Right away they meet Ted, another passenger, but Sarah doesn’t like the way Ted looks at her or treats her. He is aggressively flirting and James won’t stop him. Then her underwear is stolen and she panics. That night James finds her hanging in his cabin. He tells investigators to question Ted. Their cabin neighbor saw Ted hovering outside their room that night followed by a commotion inside the room. Police come on board and question everyone. From CCTV footage they find the underwear thief is a married man named Mike who has an alibi. But they also find Sarah’s laptop missing. Ted gets the passengers all riled up about the delay and about being questioned, but then the focus moves to James when the autopsy report comes in on Sarah. She was not hanged. She was beaten and strangled. And there is also evidence of previous beatings, revealing the dark side of their relationship. The key card record shows that James was in the cabin with Sarah when she was killed. Then they systematically prove the rest of his story is lies. James is arrested. A family member posts bail. He runs and disappears. This is the case that spawned an international survivors group and a national law to protect cruise ship victims. On August 27, 2004, 40 year old Marian Carver, a former investment banker from Cambridge, Massachusetts, boards a cruise ship in Seattle. She never tells her family that she’s going. On August 29, she disappears. Marian was taking the cruise as a vacation to relax and write poetry. Every day she emails her daughter. She is divorced so she is traveling alone. From day one, Marian befriends the cabin steward. He reports her missing immediately but his boss yells at him and tells him to just do his job. So he asks the other stewards to help him look for her. His boss has all the stewards come in and sign a non-disclosure agreement about Marian’s disappearance. In other words, a gag order. Marian’s daughter becomes distraught when several days go by and she doesn’t receive any emails from her mom. She calls and her mom doesn’t pick up. Then Marian’s dad Ken Carver calls and Marian doesn’t pick up. So Ken calls the police. The police check her apartment and her laptop. Meanwhile the cabin steward escalates his concerns to the Claims Manager who actively covers it up. Weeks go by and no one at the cruise line will talk to Ken, so he hires two lawyers, one in Massachusetts and one in Florida, to force the cruise line to comply with subpoenas to their employees. They discover that the steward’s boss disposed of Marian’s things and kept her money. :0 They never reported her missing. In August 2005 Ken sues the cruise line. The cruise line then publicly announces several false claims and outright lies. They claim that Marian killed herself and had tried to commit suicide before. She hadn’t and she didn’t. Angered at the disgusting behavior of the cruise line, Ken creates the International Cruise Victims group, http://www.internationalcruisevictims.org. In 2015, Ken and several other distraught family members who have lost loved ones on cruise ships get the Cruise Passenger Protection Act passed into law. Repeatedly in this episode, the narrator and commentators (Damian Turner and J H Moncrieff) blame the victim for her death because she traveled alone. So what is she supposed to do? Hire a stranger to go with her? That’s not freedom. And this is not her fault. She was on a cruise along the U.S. coast, not in the Caribbean. This episode made me so angry (so much victim blaming) I stopped watching this series. The victim in this episode is a cruise line employee who had worked for several years as a cruise chef. On October 13, 2007, off the coast of California, 31 year old Sarah Roberts disappears. She is a chef for the elite restaurant on the 4th deck. There is a new executive chef for the restaurant and he has been sexually harassing Sarah for months. She’s a lesbian and so he is picking on her in front of all the other staff. She emails her sister Claudia every day and fills her in on all that’s going on at work. Unlike all the other staff, she doesn’t drink, doesn’t do drugs, and doesn’t party all night long. So the others don’t accept her, even though she has more experience than they do. In fact, her culinary teachers say she was their best student. But in the restaurant, her sous chef (who is also sexually harassing her and sabotaging her work) and executive chef openly insult her and make fun of her all night long. On the night she disappears, the executive chef once again throws her food in the trash and publicly humiliates her in front of the other staff, so she steps out to take a fifteen minute break. The sous chef and executive chef follow right behind her. She is never seen again. When the restaurant manager (a woman) discovers Sarah is missing, she is deeply concerned. Sarah had previously complained several times about the sous chef harassing her. The cruise line did nothing about it. Now she’s disappeared. Another restaurant employee saw Sarah arguing outside with a male staff member. When she took her break she went to the storage deck where only staff can go but it’s also where the staff do their drug deals. The sous chef is questioned about Sarah’s disappearance and taken to that storage deck. He is so rattled, he is almost speechless then he abruptly goes back to work. The bartender comes forward and tells them she was Sarah’s lover and old girlfriend. Then she tells them about all the terrible things the sous chef did to Sarah to sabotage her job. The executive chef was the same. When the investigators get the CCTV footage of the kitchen, both the sous chef and executive chef follow Sarah out of the kitchen on her break. They are right behind her. But the CCTV footage of the deck has been erased. :0 No one is ever charged and the captain claims a rogue wave or suicide must be at fault. When a woman complains of sexual harassment she is not making it up, especially when there are multiple people who have witnessed it. So when the two commentators and the narrator repeatedly refer to Sarah’s work as “inferior” and that she is “unable to handle the stress” and “unprofessional” I get seriously pissed off. This was a clear case of a woman who excelled in her profession but had to deal with two men who were bullies and murderers. They go further and blame her for not drinking, not doing drugs, and not partying all night long, saying that she wasn’t trying to fit in. :0 Really??? 2/10 stars. This series had a great premise but was poorly executed with a lot of victim blaming, confusing details, few facts, and no mention of the corporations or cruise ship lines responsible. That should be the main focus of this storyline.

Written by Dave Gil de Rubio, [email protected] Friday, 21 December 2012 00:00 Not unlike what’s happened with books, technology’s various conveniences have also impersonalized the way we ingest music be it through downloads or the earbuds of an iPod. While LPs are arguably the best way to experience this food for the soul, there’s something to be said about cracking open either a CD booklet or a well-packaged box set, regardless of the genre. Anglophiles had plenty to rejoice about whether it was because Blur commemorated its 21st anniversary by releasing its entire canon (in addition to a live album culled from its show at the 2012 Olympics closing ceremony). Or could it be elder statesmen Elvis Costello and Peter Gabriel being represented by a pair of compilations for the former and the 25th anniversary release of the latter’s biggest album? And while there’s the deluxe edition of The Jam’s last album and the entire Roxy catalog for Union Jack fans to rave over, the Yanks got their due with the deluxe reissues of Bob Mould’s old band Sugar and Smashing Pumpkin’s sprawling 1995 double-disc third album. Blur – ParkLive [4-CD/1 DVD] (Virgin); Blur 21: The Box [18-CD/3-DVD] (Virgin) Elvis Costello – In Motion Pictures (UME); The Return of the Spectacular Spinning Songbook [CD/DVD] (Universal) Peter Gabriel – So: 25th Anniversary Edition [3-CD] (Real World Productions) The Jam – The Gift [Deluxe Edition] [2-CD] (Polydor/UME) Roxy Music – The Complete Studio Recordings [10-CD] (Virgin) Smashing Pumpkins – Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness [Deluxe Edition] [5-CD/1-DVD] (Virgin) Sugar – Copper Blue/Beaster [3-CD] (Merge); File Under: Easy Listening [Deluxe Edition] [2-CD] (Merge) The Velvet Underground – The Velvet Underground & Nico: 45th Anniversary Edition] [6-CD] (Polydor/PGD) Sony’s Legacy reissue division went whole hog this year in compiling sets that contained all the releases an artist may have released in their entirety for the company’s various imprints. Jazz and blues fared particularly well with legendary bandleaders (Louis Armstrong, Duke Ellington), guitar pioneers (Charlie Christian), Crescent City stalwarts (Preservation Hall Jazz Band), blues queens (Bessie Smith) and bop giants (Charles Mingus, Thelonious Monk) all getting their work excavated and repackaged. Louis Armstrong – The Complete Columbia/Okeh & RCA Victor Recordings 1925-1933 [10-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Charlie Christian – The Genius of the Electric Guitar [4-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Duke Ellington – The Complete Columbia Studio Albums Collection 1951-1958 [9-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Etta James – The Complete Blues, Rock ‘N’Soul, Private Music Albums Collection [7-CD] (Legacy) B.B. King – Mr. B.B. King [4-CD/10-CD] (UME) Taj Mahal – The Hidden Treasures of Taj Mahal 1969-1973 [2-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Charles Mingus – The Complete Columbia & RCA Albums Collection [10-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) The Thelonious Monk Quartet – The Complete Columbia Albums Collection [6-CD] (Columbia Legacy) Preservation Hall Jazz Band – 50th Anniversary Collection [4-CD] (Legacy Recordings) Bessie Smith – The Complete Columbia Recordings [5-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Weather Report – The Columbia Albums: 1971-1975 [7-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Lots to love in this category particularly when it comes to seminal album reissues be it from Eric Clapton (Slowhand), The Doors (L.A. Woman) or Paul and Linda McCartney (Ram). Otherwise, it was all about yet another Rolling Stones compilation (GRRR! Greatest Hits), a vintage Janis Joplin live album (Live at the Carousel Ballroom 1968) or nods to mod peers The Who (Live at Hull) and Small Faces (1966, The Beginning). Big Brother and the Holding Company featuring Janis Joplin – Live at the Carousel Ballroom 1968 (Sony Legacy) Eric Clapton – Slowhand 35th Anniversary [Deluxe Edition] [2-CD] (Polydor) Donovan – The Essential Donovan [2-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) The Doors – Live at the Bowl ’68 (Rhino); L.A. Woman [40th Anniversary Edition] [2-CD](Rhino) Heart – Strange Euphoria [3-CD/1-DVD] (Epic/Legacy) Paul & Linda McCartney – Ram (Special Edition) [2-CD] (Hear Music) The Rolling Stones – GRRR! Greatest Hits [Super Deluxe Edition] [5-CD/7” Vinyl/96-page hardback book](ABCKO/Interscope) Small Faces – 1966 [Deluxe Edition] [2-CD]; From the Beginning [2-CD] [Deluxe Edition] (Reprise) The Who – Live at Hull 1970 [2-CD] (Geffen) The Man in Black also finds all his Sony-related albums getting pulled out of the vault, dusted off, remastered and dropped on the market in the form of a gargantuan 63-CD set. For those looking for something a less wieldy, there’s the 25th anniversary reissue of Paul Simon’s iconic stab at world music (Graceland). Johnny Cash – The Complete Columbia Albums Collection [63-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Paul Simon – Graceland: 25th Anniversary Edition [2-CD/1-DVD] (Legacy) For this holiday season, cool comes in the form of yet another Elvis Presley box set, a compilation of vintage live Jerry Lee Lewis performances and the eternal hipness that was and always will be Rat Packer Dean Martin. Jerry Lee Lewis – Killer Live 1964-1970 [3-CD] (Hip-O) Dean Martin – Collected Cool [3-CD/1 DVD] (Universal) Elvis Presley – Prince From Another Planet [Deluxe] [2-CD/1-DVD] (RCA/ Legacy) The genre of loud guitars, blistering amps and heaps of teen angst continues to roll along with the complete canons of Judas Priest and Long Island sons Blue Oyster Cult all pulled together in two separate mega-boxes, a succulent overview of Alice Cooper’s early days and the long-awaited release of Led Zep’s live 2007 reunion in London. Blue Oyster Cult – The Complete Columbia Albums [17-CD] (Columbia/Legacy) Alice Cooper – Old School 1964-1974] [4-CD] (UME) Judas Priest – The Complete Albums Collection [17-CD] (Columbia/Epic/Legacy) Led Zeppelin – Celebration Day [2-CD/1 Blu-Ray/1-DVD] (Atlantic) Megadeth – Countdown to Extinction-20th Anniversary Edition [Deluxe Edition] [2-CD] (EMI) Not necessarily a genre as much as a category dedicated to the adventurous music lover. Fans of vintage garage rock can either dive into the psychedelic unorthodoxy of Texas natives the Moving Sidewalks (featuring a pre-ZZ Top Billy Gibbons), or sup on a single disc culling cuts off of Rhino Records’ seminal Nuggets box set from a few years back. Elsewhere, the 4-CD Surf Age Nuggets serves as the perfect companion for anyone that may own the aforementioned garage rock box set while reggae lovers can indulge in VP’s 4-CD overview of the genre. More conventional tastes are well served by the first Ben Harper compilation hand-picked by the man himself and a 2-CD overview of Blues Traveler balanced out by one disc of pure hits and the other chock full of b-sides, rarities and unreleased demos. Ben Harper – By My Side (Virgin) Blues Traveler – 25 (Hip-O/Select) Moving Sidewalks – The Complete Collection [2-CD] (Rockbeat Records) Various Artists – Nuggets: Original Artyfacts from the First Psychedelic Era (1965-1968) (Rhino) Various Artists – Surf Age Nuggets [4-CD] (Rockbeat Records) Various Artists – With Love: Origins of Jamaican Music [4-CD] (VP) Three-plus years after his death, the Gloved One gets remembered via the deluxe treatment of his seventh solo album. And while nostalgia junkies will swoon over memories of baby not getting put in the corner while they listen to the late Patrick Swayze croon, soul fans get to explore the recorded output of Bill Withers, the silky singing crooner that walked away from the music industry in 1985 and whose music has been covered/sampled by a myriad of artists including Sting, Barbra Streisand, John Legend and the Roots, Seal, Isaac Hayes and Fiona Apple. Michael Jackson – Bad25 [Deluxe Edition] [3-CD/1-DVD] (Sony Legacy) Various Artists – Dirty Dancing: The Deluxe Anniversary Edition (RCA/Legacy) Bill Withers – Complete Sussex and Columbia Albums Masters [9-CD] (Columbia/Legacy)

"Walk the Line," based upon two autobiographies by the late Johnny Cash, is the third high-profile music biopic in just over a year, and the best of the lot. That may be faint praise, since none of them (the other two were 2004's Ray Charles drama, "Ray ," and 2004's Bobby Darin flick, "Beyond the Sea ") have exactly stood out from the crowd in regard to storytelling innovation, but director James Mangold (2003's "Identity ") works through this hurdle by centering the film around the love story between Cash and peppy fellow singer/tour buddy June Carter (Reese Witherspoon). This main plotline drives the film forward, gives heart to the meant-to-be lovebirds, and brings focus to the usual biopics that are all over the place, sketchily developed and predictable. As with "Ray ," "Walk the Line" touches on a whole lot of familiar territory; these films might be based on real lives, but those said lives are cliches when placed in a cinematic format. One can make a checklist as they go of the formulaic elements on display: the nervous audition where the artist performs for a record producer and gets signed; the sudden rise to fame and fortune; the strain that the musician's career has on his marriage; the gal on the side who might be better for him than his current wife; the drug addiction that threatens to ruin his career and the relationships he holds dearest, and finally, the tragic event from his childhood that, in part, shapes his own future and the person he becomes. "Walk the Line" has all of these things, walking its own fine line between old-hat and acceptably conventional, but the powerhouse performances from Joaquin Phoenix (2004's "Ladder 49 ") and Reese Witherspoon (2005's "Just Like Heaven ") sell even the mustier of moments. These two have a hot and playful chemistry with each other, selling the notion along that way that Johnny Cash and June Carter were unequivocal soul mates. The 1940s prologue set around the Arkansas cotton farm where Johnny was raised starts things on a high note, depicting a close, loving bond between his 12-year-old self (Ridge Canipe) and slightly older brother Jack (Lucas Till) before a freak accident while sawing wood takes Jack's life. Their hard-nosed father, Ray (Robert Patrick), doesn't even try to hide his resentment, proclaiming that God took the wrong son. This traumatic part of Johnny's childhood haunts him into adulthood (now played by Joaquin Phoenix), as he briefly goes into the military, takes a wife, Vivian (Ginnifer Goodwin), has children, and then manages to sign with a local record label. While on tour, he meets the effervescent June Carter (Reese Witherspoon), a smart firecracker of a country star who confesses that she makes up for her only fair singing voice by being an ace entertainer. Johnny, who has been a fan of June's for years, is instantly smitten and can't help it, eventually taking her on tour with him as his stardom rises. Myriad conflicts, however, get in the way of them becoming a couple: marriage, divorce, children, and Johnny's self-destructive addiction to pills. As anyone with a passing knowledge of these iconic celebrities will already know from the start of "Walk the Line," Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash were happily married for thirty-five years, frequently collaborating with each other on artistic ventures and deeply in love until June's passing in 2003. Johnny died just a few months later, some attesting it to a broken heart. Because the viewer already knows where the film is going, climaxing in the late '60s with June's onstage acceptance of Johnny's marriage proposal, it is in the journey to that point that matters most. "Walk the Line" might have done a more thorough job of portraying the details of Johnny's early career and songwriting, and the overall narrative is told in a straightforward, unoriginal manner. Nonetheless, the fiery, complex relationship that forms between Johnny and June is an involving one, and writer-director James Mangold and co-screenwriter Gill Dennis stay away from the overdone melodramatics of "Ray If Joaquin Phoenix doesn't share an uncanny physical resemblance to Cash the way that Jamie Foxx managed as Ray Charles, he makes up for it by digging underneath this legend and evoking him through mannerism and voice. As strong as Foxx was in "Ray ," the jury is still out if he did much more than do a great impersonation of him. Phoenix goes deeper than that, bringing stark but accessible emotions and an unashamed passion for June that makes him a likable presence throughout. He also amazes in his performance sequencessome of the most electrifying in the film, despite not personally being familiar with any of these earlier songs except "Ring of Fire"capturing Cash's deep, one-of-a-kind voice and the cool command he had over concert audiences. In a stunning turn of her ownmaybe her best since 1999's "Election "Reese Witherspoon plays June Carter with depth, warmth and insight, ably shedding her frothy romantic-comedy persona of the last few years and disappearing into the demanding part. Witherspoon turns out to be a talented singer herself, but where she genuinely impresses is in the way she effortlessly modulates her bubbly on-stage personality and her more serious, introspective side in her personal life. Witherspoon's June is a woman torn between responsibility and giving into her feelings; indeed, she resists Johnny's advances for so long not because she doesn't love himit's obvious she doesbut out of fear that he'll disappoint her and turn back to drugs. Supporting performances are mostly peripherally written, with cameos from Elvis Presley (Tyler Hilton), Jerry Lee Lewis (Waylon Malloy Payne), Roy Orbison (Johnathan Rice), and Waylon Jennings (real-life son Shooter Jennings). As Johnny's first wife, Vivian, Ginnifer Goodwin (2003's "Win a Date with Tad Hamilton! ") does a nice job of being harpy on occasion, but just as often sympathetic as she grows understandably suspect of what her husband does when he is away from her and on the road. Finally, Robert Patrick (2003's "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle ") superbly plays Johnny's father, Ray, as spiteful in his treatment of his son, who can never do enough to please him, but never as a one-dimensional caricature; their rocky relationship is plausible and painful to watch for all the right reasons. "Walk the Line" is two-and-one-quarter hours in length, but only scrapes the surface of Johnny's life as a whole. By only covering a twenty-year span and ending in 1968, the movie deprives the viewer of some of Cash's greatest songs and his other work later in life. Even with the lessened time frame, the film, as with most biopics, moves a little unevenly through the years, passing them by with barely a scene or two each. If "Walk the Line" fails to break new ground or blow the viewer away, the central love story between these two famed public figures feels authentic and truthful, aided in no small part by Oscar-bound stars Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon. By the end, there is no question that June made Johnny a better man, both personally and professionally. This is the main conceit in "Walk the Line," and one that director James Mangold illustrates just right.

Went for a holiday and back with a skin which has faced harsh sunlight, dirt etc or you are a working woman who face dirt and pollution every day then Deep cleansing method is the one for you.Yes it has oil in it but don’t worry it wont break out your skin instead it will help in reducing pores of the skin. Method will remove away all the impurities and will make the skin child like soft. I haven’t tried this method since two month and was missing it .While doing it thought of sharing it with my readers.Though I have already done a post on this but doing it with step by step pictures is all the more fun. Here it goes Olive oil/Almond oil/coconut oil(You can choose any) 3 vitamin E capsules(optional but i love the feeling of vitamin E going under my skin) good quality cotton pads Step1-Take 4tbsp of olive oil.I think even three will do.You can take two tbsp. of almond oil and 2tbsp. of olive oil .You can replace olive oil with coconut oil too. Step2-Add2-3 vitamin E capsules .You can add the vitamin E oil too. Step3-Take cotton facial pad and make and give it a shape of your face.(The shape of my face is quite interesting.huh!!!) Step4-Heat the oil in microwave for 3-4 minutes.You can use a double boiler technique if you do not have microwave. Step5-Soak the cotton pad into the oil.Make sure that the oil is not too hot and neither too cold for your skin.Open it up carefully.If you think there is too much oil and it will pour down from your face then you can squeeze off some oil from the cotton pad. Step6-Open the oil soak cotton pad and place it on your face. (Ain’t I looking beautiful.Come on !!! I asked my husband and I guess he has learnt the art.He said you are.. like always..) Now press the cotton pads a bit so that oil is absorbed easily by your skin.Make sure that oil doesn’t get into your eyes as well. You can put soaked rose essence (gulab jal) cotton balls on your eyes to have a soothing effect.Just relax and enjoy it .This process is actually quiet relaxing. Remove the hot oil cotton pads when they get cool. With the help of your hands massage the oil on your face .This will remove make up, dirt and other impurities. Give the oil ample time in dissolving impurities of your face. If oily skin people want to use this therapy then they should apply a multani mitti(fuller earth pack) after washing face with cold water.(I suffer from acne problem too and when i have skipped the multani mitti face pack then also it never gave me pimples) Using this therapy will help in getting rid of black and white heads. Blemishes and wrinkles will slowly fade away and will slower down skin aging process.

Eric goes to visit Brooke. He apologizes for what Stephanie did but tells her that as far as he is concerned, she will always be part of the Forrester family. To prove that, he brings in a gift for her. A wedding dress that he designed and he hopes she approves. He tells her that she will always have his support, even if Stephanie turned against her. Still pointing the gun at Deacon's head, Massimo tells him this is what happens if someone crosses him. Does he understand that? Deacon emphatically says yes. Massimo removes the gun from Deacon's head and says, now welcome to my family. Massimo asks Deacon if it's true that he would do anything to be part of his organization. Deacon responds with the fact that it is true. Massimo tells him he needs to be able to trust him. Deacon says he can. Massimo explains that he has an assignment for him, and now he must decide whether or not he wants in. Deacon says he wants in. What is the assignment? The job is this. Massimo wants him to become a close confidant of Jackie's. They are friends all ready, sort of. Deacon asks why Mass would want him to spy on his wife. Massimo knows Jackie was lying to him. She was out all night and gave the excuse of being drunk but Massimo thinks something else and he wants to know if she is seeing someone. Deacon is then to report back to him. Deacon knows not to get on Massimo's bad side, but the person that Massimo thinks Jackie is seeing, is Eric Forrester. Deacon and Massimo emerge from his den. They shake hands and Deacon leaves. Jackie asks what was going on between the two of them and Massimo replies that he had just welcomed Deacon into the family. From his car, Deacon and Jackie talk on their cell phones. Deacon tells her that Massimo didn't believe her story the other night. Massimo is playing a game of "I Spy" with her, and he has hired someone to keep an eye on her. Jackie asks, "Who?" and Deacon replies, "Me"!! Jackie and Nicky spend a few moments talking. He is all excited about the events of the day. He tells his Mother that since he met Brooke so much has happened to him. First, he became a Marone, then he got himself engaged to be married, he has a brand new baby son on the way and an adopted daughter. Jackie is somewhat befuddled. She can't figure out why Nicky wanted to invite Deacon to the ceremony. Nicky tells her that he will always have a part in Hope's life. She needs to get that straight right now. Nick implies that Eric must have told her all about Deacon's past, because it sure colored the facts and everyone deserves a second chance. Later Nick tells Brooke that he doesn't like the way Jackie and Massimo are getting along. Something is going on with them. Nick tells Brooke that they must always tell each other everything to keep all things out in the open, even if the other person doesn't like it. Nick tells Brooke that he is her Captain. At home, Massimo confided to Stephanie his worries about Jackie. Stephanie confirmed for Massimo that if Jackie is having an affair, it is not with Eric. Massimo revealed that he had hired Deacon to spy on Jackie. At his house, Deacon told Jackie that Massimo had hired him to spy on her. Deacon explained that he had no choice but to accept the job. Furthermore, Deacon explained that if he did not take the job Massimo would have hired someone who may have discovered the truth about what happened between the two of them. Deacon explained he can protect Jackie now that he will know what Massimo is thinking. Jackie was suspicious that perhaps Massimo does know what happened between her and Deacon and is just playing a game with them. While Jackie was still there, Massimo telephoned Deacon. Deacon reported to Massimo that Jackie went shopping and later was with a handsome man at a Beverly Hills restaurant. Deacon quickly explained that the handsome man is the waiter. Deacon advised Jackie to actually have shopping bags when she arrives home. Deacon passionately kissed Jackie over her protest. When Jackie arrived home, Massimo badgered her about what is going on with her. Jackie "confessed" to Massimo by saying that she loves him. Massimo melted and softened. At home Brooke and Nick planned their wedding party. Nick would ask Massimo to be his best man; Brooke would ask Katie to be her matron of honor. They decided Hope would be the flower girl. Brooke admitted to Nick that she would always love Ridge. Nick said he understood. He advised Brooke that the two of them need to be completely honest with one another; otherwise their marriage would not work out. Brooke told Nick that because he has been patient and never gave up on her, she loves him. Meanwhile, Ridge sneaked into Nick's office to search for information to use against him. While he was there, Nick walked in to answer a pager. While Ridge hid, he overheard Nick speak to a woman on the speaker phone. The woman indicated that she needed to see Nick. She requested that he meet her at his boat. Nick refused to meet her because he explained to her that it was too risky and that he had too much to lose. Sally calls Darla, Thorne and Clarke into her office for an emergency meeting. After they all rush in, she announces that she has offered to buy Logan Designs from Massimo for the same amount that he paid her for Spectra. She is sure that he will agree to it, as Logan Designs sales have been low ever since Ridge left. Over the P.A. system, she tells all the employees to meet outside her office for an important announcement. Meanwhile, Massimo goes to see Brooke and asks what she thinks of selling Logan Designs back to Sally. After Brooke agrees to the sale, Massimo calls Sally and tells her that he will be right over. When he arrives, he pushes through all the people in the hall to tell Sally that he is accepting her offer. Samantha and Caitlin sit in Caitlin's room looking at old pictures and memorabilia. Caitlin asks Samantha if she can call Samantha "mom," and of course Samantha says yes. Caitlin then asks about Samantha's relationship with Hector. As Hector stands in the door way listening, Samantha hesitates to tell Caitlin much about her feelings for Hector. Caitlin tells her that she wants Samantha to live with them. Hector enters and tells them that it is a great idea. At the Forresters', Samantha told Stephanie and Eric how grateful she was that they invited her to live there. She told them that if they had not, she would have gone back to New York and never met her daughter. She then told them that Hector and Caitlin asked her to move in with them, which Eric thought was wonderful but Stephanie asked if Sam was really ready for that. Sam explained that there was a lot of catching up to do and and that the reason for Stephanie and Eric watching the kids for them was the reason why she wanted to let nature take it's course and told them she didn't want to worry about anything. A knock on the door signified that Hector, Caitlin and Jimmy had arrived. After sharing pleasantries, and with Caitlin running into Sam's arms and saying, "Hi Mom!", Hector walked over to Sam took her hands and kissed her cheek, commenting on how good it was to see her. Thomas and the girls came downstairs and were introduced to Hector's son. Stephanie and Eric are talked to Sam and Hector about how amazing their story is. Eric told Hector that he's a lucky man. Hector agreed. Hector thanked them for inviting them all over. Eric and Stephanie told him that Sam is family, which meant that he's family too. They joke around a bit, and then Sam said she did not realize there would be such a houseful. Stephanie told her it was just like old times. Jimmy told Stephanie that she has a "phat crib." Stephanie told him he "ain't seen nothin' yet" and suggests Thomas take them all down to the pool. Eric told Hector and Sam not to worry about them, they'll keep a close eye out. Stephanie takes Sam to the side and gives her a bag. Sam says "Please don't tell me this is lingerie!" Stephanie told her it was, and they both laughed. Then Sam left to make sure everything at the guest house was "just right." Eric and Hector had a drink and discussed the travails of raising a teenage daughter. Suddenly Hector asked where Samantha was and Stephanie told him she was in the guest house waiting for him, and pushed him in that direction. As Stephanie and Eric head for another part of the house, Caitlin and Thomas walk in. Caitlin surmised that Thomas wanted to get her alone. Thomas said he wanted to see how she was doing. Thomas asked her if it was too much finding out that Samantha was her mother. Caitlin says it was what she's always wanted. Thomas says it would be understandable if she was freaking out. Caitlin just doesn't want to mess anything up, and told Thomas about inviting Sam to move in. Thomas was surprised and asked how she reacted. Caitlin said Sam was thinking about it. She said they hadn't seen each other in years and they would have to get to know each other again. Thomas said that's what tonight was about. They didn't tell Hector about it, they wanted it to be a surprise. Thomas says he's gonna be surprised alright! Hector arrived at the guest house to find the door ajar. He pushed it open calling out to Samantha. He walked in and found candles and champagne waiting for him. He called her name and she walked into the room in a sexy black dress. "I'm right here." She said softly. Hector had a really big smile on his face. Jimmy and the girls walked back in and found Thomas and Caitlin. Thomas said he kept getting his guides mixed up and the girls joked around playing name games with him. Jimmy asked where his dad was, and they told him he was down at the guest house with Sam. Jimmy rolled his eyes and anticipated romance for his dad. Caitlin told him it was just a dinner. James said "Yea, but if it goes well...." And began rubbing his hands together in laughter. "It will," says Caitlin. "It has to." Eric and Stephanie shared a drink and a quiet moment in the moonlight. "Hector seems like a nice man," said Eric. Stephanie said he is....and he's still crazy about her after all this time. Eric said that Samantha deserved to have something good happen in her life. Stephanie said life was so strange sometimes. "Some people have all the luck, some people don't have any" and then commented on how lucky they were to have found each other again. "You look stunning!" said Hector. He was wowed by all the trouble she went to. She said she felt they needed a little time by themselves. Hector realized they weren't going to have dinner with Stephanie and Eric after all, but were going to spend the evening alone together. He didn't seem disappointed! They picked up their champagne glasses and clinked them in a toast, looking at each other intently. Hector told Samantha that her everything was so nice as Sam explained that they needed some time alone. He told her that years before he had promised her he would always love her and that had not changed. He told her she was the most beautiful woman in the world....even more beautiful than when he knew her before, plus she was the mother of his child. He explained that he didn't need more and that it had always been Sam. Oscar was in Massimo's den looking at a book. Massimo walks in and said, "Oscar, there you are, what are you reading?" Oscar said family history. Massimo said the shelves were filled with books on their family history. Oscar said that makes him proud. Massimo told him he's a good man. Then Oscar approached Massimo about the job he asked him about. Massimo told him he had not forgotten. Oscar asked if he had talked to Nick about it yet, because he felt he was wasting his time at Forrester Creations. Massimo asked if things had gotten any better over there since Thorne was made President. Oscar told him nothing had changed, and that he felt he just didn't fit in. "So you want to work for Marone Industries, you want to earn your ring?" Asked Massimo. Oscar said he'll do anything, work on the docks, drive a fork-lift, load crates, anything. Massimo took that to mean that he'd rather work on the docks at Marone than have his own little office at Forrester Creations. "What can I tell you, fashion is not my thing." Said Oscar. As they further discussed Oscar's ambitions, Nick walked in on them. He apologized for interrupting. Oscar gave Massimo one last request for him to think about it, and then left leaving Nick and Massimo alone. Mass explained that Oscar was looking for a spot in the family business. Massimo says Oscar was campaigning hard for it. Nick said they could always use another fast talker. Well he is a Marone after all said Massimo. They discussed some business that Massimo had asked Nick to take care of. Nick says it was all handled. Then Nick said there was another important item they needed to discuss, and asked Massimo to be his best man. "You want me to be your best man!" said Massimo. Nick asked him if he wanted the job, and Massimo told him it would be an honor. Nick told him to just wait until he had Massimo running his errands! "Anything for my son," said Massimo. Then Massimo wondered if Nick would let him take care of the honeymoon. But Nick said he had that covered. "What about a bachelor party?" said Massimo. "NO! No bachelor party," said Nick. "But it's traditional!" Said Massimo. Nick said he was an untraditional guy. "And no baby showers!" he added. Massimo seemed frustrated. Nick told him to just be there for him. Massimo said he had dreamed of this time and that in all he had achieved, nothing compared with Nick being engaged to Brooke and being happy. Nick reminded him that best man was not an honorary title and that he was going to work Massimo hard and that he expected him to be up to the task. "Aye, aye Captain!" said Massimo. Deacon sits a corner watching Brooke, her sister and Jackie. Deacon gets a call from Massimo. Massimo asks how everything is going. Deacon says all is well and they are having a good time. Nick stops in to see Massimo. He is telling his Father that no one would say anything about the bachelorette party and he doesn't even have any idea where it is. Massimo tells him they are at Café Russe and having a delightful time. The wedding is scheduled to be the next day. Nick turns up at the restaurant and sings a song for Brooke. He meets her sister and then leaves. Ridge breaks into Nick's office. He is trying to find out any info on Nick. He tries to figure out Nick's password and realizes that it has been changed. He searches until he figures out the password is Brooke. Next, there is a restriction code. He finds a series of numbers on the bottom of the keyboard. He is able to get through. He finds that Nick's one and only pen pal is a woman by the name of Maya. He finds also that there are cryptic messages, wire transfers $100 grand. What is all this? Massimo wouldn't do business like this. Ridge looks into Nick's telephone file and finds the initials M.S. with the same email address. He is interrupted by a phone call from Massimo himself. He is calling to see how Ridge is and he wants to see him. Ridge suggests the next day. Massimo says Ridge knows that is the day of the wedding. Ridge claims there isn't going to be any wedding. Massimo tells Ridge that Nick is trying to do the honorable thing. Ridge tells him to keep telling himself that. He hangs up and calls Maya. He is pretending to be Nick. He makes a date with her for the next day. Ridge hangs up. Gotcha!! Samantha and Hector celebrate their being together. They start out with a special dinner that Samantha planned. They end up making love

My H, when we first met, fit somewhere in the middle of the extreme with his reactions. He used to turn a little too obviously to follow the progress of a female - (if he enjoyed the front view he wanted to also check out the rear), but with a few elbows to the ribs early on he became more discreet. He subscribed to Playboy for decades, and I never really objected to that. It was a different matter, however, if I caught him peering out the window at the sunbathing neighbor. Do you guys see the difference, and why this bothered me? (No A with the neighbor, thank goodness.) I believe he subscribed to the theory that it was acceptable to look but not touch, which I agreed with to a point. That also probably enabled him in falling into an OEA - he knew he was never going to be near this person or touch her - but that's a t/j for another day. Another thing he used to do that bothered me was if he was out somewhere in public - say a fair, or at the races, etc., and saw a young woman in revealing clothing that he could discreetly photograph, he would. I also saw that as being very different from the Playboy thing - somehow intruding on these women's privacy, even though they chose to dress that way in public. I didn't like it. Post d-day, I became much less 'understanding' - any female photos were destroyed. I believe his attitude about that type of thing has changed also - he's not a good actor, never has been. I think he is much less likely to just snap a photo of any pretty girl he sees. FWIW, when we met I was an aerobics instructor and did swimsuit modelling for the first several years of our marriage. So it's not as if I suffered from self-esteem issues about my appearance. I'm rambling all over the place here, sorry. Just got to thinking and wondering where most guys stand with regard to making the most of opportunities to look at women they find attractive. Thanks for bearing with me! While my boundaries might make it "okay" to look -- or strike up a conversation, or have some sort of minimal physical contact -- it might not be permissible within their boundary structure ... which makes it wrong. I get that this is something most people don't actively think about. I know I didn't for a very long time, and it's something I definitely spend time thinking about now. Guys do like to look. Its a natural drive. I consider myself fairly conservative and considerate, and even I like to look. That said, there is a difference between what is 'acceptable' and what is 'considerate'. I would never buy Playboy and certainly never photograph neighbours! Its about not only what I think is 'ok', but what my partner thinks is ok and not upsetting her, and in that respect is a very individual thing, I think. Bare in mind that whatever boundaries you set, he will bend them by about 10% anyway, so account for that too. [This message edited by Ixion at 2:06 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)] I have been in counseling and read numerous books. Pre-A I would notice and look at other women....in real life as well as pornography. My wife and I had very regular sex...I would say more then most couples we know...and I would masturbate regularly...my wife had almost full knowledge of this and she would view porn with me some too...I didn't sneak around but I didn't always tell her every time I did it either. I saw no harm in it then. Again, I thought this is a normal guy thing. Since the affair I have done what is recommended...I have worked on the only person I can change...ME! I have specifically concentrated on what intimacy is and how it is nurtured or destroyed. Most of the time I am 180 degrees different on this topic now. I say most of the time because it is a natural urge within me to still look. But just because it is a natural urge does not make it healthy...and certainly does not make it harmless. Maybe too much info following...but feel the need to explain how I have changed. I have masturbated exactly 7 times since DD (10 months ago)...each time it has felt less fulfilling. This is in the face of decreasing sex with my wife. So here I am...having less sex with my wife and spending less time masturbating too. I am literally shocked to find out that I can go days...weeks without sex. There was a point in my life that I literally thought a man HAS to have that release to be healthy. Even now I wonder sometimes if I will be able to do it after not doing it for weeks. I cant explain this crazy thought...just telling you it was such a part of me for decades that a part of me still gets concerned.... Now, in real life, I find myself bouncing my eyes more. I still have a strong desire to soak in the beauty of most women...not just Barbie types...but am getting pretty good at stopping myself. I am not taking credit for my wifes decision to have an affair...but I plainly see how my actions pre-A hurt intimacy in my marriage. And if it didn't always hurt it...it never helped nurture it. NOTE: Pre-A anytime I viewed an attractive woman in real life and thought inappropriate thoughts about her...it was all in a fantasy bubble. Since the A...I have had moments where I would view an attractive woman and see it as a real possibility...and that feeling scares the hell out of me! This is when I really started to focus on this aspect of ME...and what I was and am willing to do for myself and my wife. This entire experience is life-altering. God be with us all. [This message edited by blakesteele at 4:09 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)] I think it is only through conscious decisions that men will move in the unnatural direction of healthy intimacy and away from the natural, primal sex drive they have inside them. that's my honest perception. [This message edited by blakesteele at 4:15 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)] Just was pondering on the things he used to do and how I felt about it at the time. In the aftermath of the OEA I started to pick at old scabs and dig up issues that weren't fully dealt with back in the day. "You did THAT 20 yrs ago and it really hurt!" And of course we could start a whole other thread on how healthy it is for me to dig up old grudges on behaviors that haven't been an issue for years. Nah I don't think that last part. The dinosaurs thing. That part, I made that up. Taking pics or peeping on someone seems violating. Creepy level violating. Like, a few steps away from a wall filled criminal evidence kind of creepy. My H now seems embarrassed if I bring up his old behaviors. But I was also reminded of this topic not long ago when a co-worker was sharing that her H came back from a trip with his buddies with lots of Girls Gone Wild type photos - wet t-shirt contests, that type of thing. This lady didn't seem to mind her H doing that, seemed to think it was funny. Another coworker chimed in that she would NOT be happy if her own H did that. I kept quiet, didn't really want to share that my H used to be like that too. MartlArts, you said you could open another thread to discuss whether it's healthy to bring up "old grudges." I'll just address it in this thread. Examining patterns post d-day is really important. It's not fun, and it can hurt, but it helps you understand what's happened so that you can ensure it doesn't happen again. I have to add: photographing people without their consent is a HUGE breach of boundary, and I would have a real problem with it. As you turn things over in your mind, please be honest about their significance. This is a biggie. You went from being concerned to defending your husband, who's gone from worrisome WS to "getting better over the years." How did that happen? How did a man who's cheated in the very recent past graduate to "much better over the years?" Don't betray yourself by being dishonest while examining your life together. Trust me on this---there is NO worse betrayal to overcome than self-betrayal. Then she finally pushed too far, and he apparently had an OMG She's serious moment, and went NC after that. He didn't go so far as to block her, just stopped responding. The more he ignored the more desperate she got. At the time I got that weird gut feeling it had been several months since he'd responded to her and she was stepping up the campaign to recapture his attention, but not succeeding. I got in touch with her and let her know I had the ammunition to blow up her life, and that was that. And yes, I'm confident the above is accurate. I have filters on that H is unaware of. I also have cyberstalked her a bit and have indications she set her sights elsewhere. So cheating - yes, there was an EA, and it hurt that he gave that attention to someone else. He did not "get" the slippery slope he was on until she really got blatant. Then he thought he'd dodged a bullet by NC-ing her. We've now been through the Not Just Friends and other reading, and he understands and does NOT want to be part of that again. So - long answer to the very valid question you asked, sorry. But the fact is that it has been many years since the asshat behavior of ogling females. The OEA was a new type of stupid asshat behavior. He did not seem to get - in both those instances - that there were other types of cheating besides PA. He gets it now, I believe. But my mind was wondering about how the guys on here react, hence my question. [This message edited by MartlArts at 3:42 PM, July 17th (Wednesday)] The EA? Yeah. I can see how he sort of got clobbered by that. And it seems as though he has owned that, as well---which is often a real hurdle. I can't turn off my eyes, though sometimes I wish I could. I figure I'm wired to notice women, and I do - but my W didn't worry about it until her mid 50s. She's OK with it now, too, since I think she realizes I like seeing women, but I really like looking at her, if you see the diff. Playboy is pictures ... not real. Real people are real. I see a big diff there. Real people are entitled to some privacy. OTOH, if a neighbor is exhibiting herself inappropriately, I do my best not to buy into her game. Snapping photos surreptitiously is a violation of the subjects, IMO. The subject owns her image. A secret photo, even in a public place, seems a lot like stealing to me. (Besides, I'd much rather look at my W IRL than a pic of any random woman I fleetingly saw, so I really don't see the point. Except maybe if it's Salma Hayek or Megan Fox or someone like that.) Anyway, I look. I enjoy. I pass on. Seeing a sexy woman on the street is great, but it's only a fleeting pleasure for me. T/J - Strange thing, though...we go to an outdoor dance every Summer week. It starts with a lesson, and there's always a (different) woman who almost mesmerizes me. But when the dancing starts, if it's swing, there's a guy who draws my eye - I sure wish I could dance like he does.

Title: MOM WHO BEAT HER CHILD WAS MEMBER OF OCCULT BASED GROUP KNOWN AS "IRISH TRAVELERS", OR "GYPSIES", OR "TINKERERS" -- A GROUP SAID TO PRACTICE GENERATIONAL PEDOPHILIA Resources to aid your Understanding Learn how to protect yourself, your loved ones! Stand by for insights so startling you will never look at the news the same way again. YOU ARE NOW ON THE CUTTING EDGE This most unusual story has two very distinct sides: the Public and the Private. Our Lord Jesus warned us three times in Matthew 24 that the End of the Age would be characterized by extreme, unusual, and unprecedented deception in both the spiritual and political realm. In Matthew 24:24, Jesus warned of such great deception that it would even deceive the Elect of God, were that possible. Jesus said that the leaders of the End of the Age would practice unprecedented deception, but particularly false "Christs" (political figures, as "Christ" is the office of Messiah, Who will be King) and false "Prophets" (religious figures). This spiritual deception also naturally extends to both individuals and the communities of which they are a part. Thus, we have the examples of David Koresch leading his group astray and Jim Jones commanding the Jonestown mass suicide. But, we also have larger communities as well that fall into this area of deception. The Irish Travelers are just such a group. On the surface, they keep to themselves and consciously exclude outsiders. Even though they make a living by breaking the law, they are not shut down by law enforcement, even though some individuals are behind bars. Let us now examine the infamous case of Madelyne Toogood, who was caught on video tape beating and slapping her 4-year-old daughter in her van in a Kohl Shopping Center Mall. This story has a very dark, very sinister side to it that must be made public. You will be shocked to discover a probable linkage in goals between the Travelers and groups like NAMBLA (North American Man Boy Love Association) and some of our politicians in Congress! Let us examine the public story first. NEWS BRIEF: "Attorney: Videotaped mother to turn herself in", 9/20/02, CNN.com News. "SOUTH BEND, Indiana (CNN) -- The woman being sought by police after being caught on videotape apparently beating her 4-year-old daughter will turn herself in to authorities Saturday, her attorney told CNN ... Police have been searching for Toogood since a surveillance camera videotape aired nationwide Thursday showing her apparently slapping and punching her little girl inside an SUV in a store parking lot. The tape was made last week." This mother, Madelyn Toogood, was caught on surveillance tape in the parking lot of Kohl's Department Store beating her little daughter in the back seat of her SUV. While I was horrified at the mother's action, I first thought of the possibility that this case might serve as a launching pad for people opposed to the Biblical mandate of physical punishment of a child; my second thought was that this incident proves the pervasiveness of our surveillance society. Virtually everywhere a citizen goes, he or she is caught on surveillance camera. Our Forefathers knew that individual freedom is dependent upon individual anonymity, so the sudden pervasiveness of cameras everywhere is a threat to our liberty. Dictatorships throughout history maintained a pervasive penetration of society through the use of secret police who had paid and unpaid informants strewn thoroughly throughout society to watch the average citizen; our coming dictators will rely less upon traditional secret police tactics in surveillance because cameras will do much of the work for them. News stories showed a distraught mother, who had obviously done a lot of crying, pleading with authorities not to take her daughter and her other children from her. Many a parent has come to the verge of being distraught by a willfully stubborn child, but there is clearly no excuse for a parent to repeatedly strike a child in the head like this mother did. Further, parents all over the world will sympathize with a mother who may be about to lose custody of her children. Thus, the picture of a tearful, red-faced, mother on national news undoubtedly tugged at many a parent's heart. However, it did not take long for a very different angle to develop about Madelyne Toogood and her background. NEWS BRIEF: "Toogood and Daley: Believed to be members of Irish Travelers", 9/23/02, WNDU16 News Center, http://www.wndu.com/news/contact16/contact16_2450.php "Some local authorities will not refer to Madelyn Gorman/Toogood and Margaret Daley as 'Travelers' but a local expert on Travelers says from the video he's seen, he believes the women are Irish Travelers. There are an estimated 12,000 to 20,000 Irish Travelers in the United States, mostly in South Carolina and Texas. This is where it is believed Gorman and her family is from. Travelers live a nomadic lifestyle, moving from town to town in large groups to do seasonal work but they've also been labeled, by some, as scam artists. Most Irish Travelers in this country are descendants of 19th century Irish immigrants. They are also known as Irish gypsies or "tinkers". If you are like me, you have never heard of "Irish Travelers", unless you live in Texas or South Carolina. South Carolinians to whom I have spoken about the "Travelers" will tell you that they are a very close-knit community and that they are not trustworthy. However, this expert quoted on this WNDU16 News Center story tells us that they are "scam artists". This expert continues: "Traveler expert -- Elkhart resident Don Wright has been investigating the Travelers for 24 years. He's published books including one called 'Scam!'. Wright says many of these scams take place in our own backyard. Between April and October, there are between 15 to 20 families in the Michiana area running these scams. When Wright saw the Kohl's parking lot assault video, he knew this was more than just a case of child abuse. After seeing the video, Traveler expert Don Wright says he called police and other Travelers and came to this conclusion. "I started making calls right away and found out, yes indeed, they were Irish Travelers." Therefore, this mother beating her child was not an average, typical American housewife; she was likely involved in criminal activity so commonplace amongst Travelers. Scams and outright thievery is the way in which they earn their living. This Travelers expert continues: "Reasons behind the beating -- Wright believes the beating happened for one of two reasons. 'The little girl gave away the scam to an employee or the mom was so ticked off at not getting refunds she took it out on the little girl'." If a parent does not have the Christian values against stealing, as evidenced by their life of crime, what makes us think they would possess Christian values against beating their children as we saw on the video tape? Keep this thought in mind as we will return to it in a few moments. Now, let us return to more facts about the Travelers from Don Wright. "Why do they travel here? -- Wright has heard of Travelers working in the Michiana area. He says certain things in the video lend him to believe these women are Travelers. 'The fact that the license plate was from Texas - I knew who they were'. Wright wrote about Travelers who travel from Fort Worth, Texas, to Indiana in his 1996 book called 'Scam!' "A majority of the Travelers come to Elkhart a few times a year to pick up travel trailers they use for different scams. Wright says the trailer is a scam in and of itself. They live in it until they can sell it for an exorbitant price. Meanwhile, men of the Travelers do house scams and the women do shoplifting scams. Wright says it is common to take along their children. 'This is on the job training for kids. They learn to shoplift at their mothers elbows'." "Prosecutor Chris Toth said today that the reason Kohl's began to follow these two women and their daughters was because they had scammed the store before. Police in Fort Worth say in March they arrested Madelyn Gorman for an alleged theft at Kohls." Now, we have a more complete picture, do we not? Madelyne Toogood had scammed this store before, and had been arrested in March of this year for an alleged theft at Kohls. Once again, we have the picture emerging here of a mother who is a known shoplifter and refund scam artist. Refund artists have bedeviled retailers for decades now, as the losses of fraudulent merchandise returns routinely runs into the millions of dollars. Some professional refund scam artists garner $2,000 daily from hapless retailers who are afraid to say "No" for fearing of angering consumers. Madelyne Toogood is a member of the Irish Travelers, a nomadic group that has lived through scams and theft since they came to this country about 150 years ago. Thus, they are generational thieves. Here are some of their many scams. * While some men come to the front door to speak to the owner about doing repairs on their house, other Travelers were going in the back door to steal whatever they could carry in the time given them by the conversation with the owner. Obviously, the front door Travelers developed the art of keeping the owner occupied for a long period of time. * During the Fall Season, when produce was hanging thickly on the vine, Travelers would stop near a garden patch or a field. During the day, men, women and children would go through the community offering to read fortunes or palms; but, at night, the men would quietly pick the produce and load it into their trucks. The entire group would be gone before morning. These travelers would then go to a community some drive from the victims and sell the produce out of their tailgates as if they had grown it. * Travelers are known to target the elderly with a variety of scams designed to fleece them of their lifesavings. Starting to "fix" roofs that need no fixing, and where the owner gave no prior permission, is one common scam. Or, agreeing to fix a roof, and then demanding a large upfront fee is one scam, because the group will never finish the project once they have the money in hand. They will simply disappear. * While the men would normally target houses to scam, women and children typically target retailers. They will usually steal merchandise so they could later "return" it for a refund. They became expert at arguing for a cash refund rather than a credit slip. Evidently, this type of scam is what Madelyn Toogood was doing with her innocent looking daughter at her side. THE OCCULT NATURE OF THE TRAVELER'S As we have already noted, the Travelers are generational scam artists, and therefore, very much out of the realm of the Christian community. However, when the Traveler expert, Don Wright, noted that they were "gypsies", all sorts of red flags went up. Gypsies are a very distinct group in Europe, Great Britain, and Ireland. They are followers of White Magic Witchcraft, that type of witchcraft supposedly practiced for the "good of mankind". All over Europe and Ireland, gypsies would travel nomadically, offering their services, reading palms and telling fortunes; however, they also practiced many of the scams we have noted above, so they were not welcome in many communities. Recent European history offers us a very different perspective on the true depth of White Magic Witchcraft practiced by the Gypsies. When Adolf Hitler began to consolidate his power after 1933, he began a systematic campaign to annihilate anyone he considered to be either an enemy that threatened him, or anyone who could tell the German people that he was practicing Black Magick Witchcraft. You see, Hitler knew that White Magic practitioners would instantly recognize who he truly was, what his plans were for humanity, and the true dark source of his power. In Witchcraft, a person learns the details of the occult, the rituals, and the power. At some point in his or her occult path, each witch must determine whether they are going to use the power of the occult for the "good" of humanity or for "evil". If a person decides to use their occult knowledge and power for "good", they are said to have chosen the Right Hand Path of White Magic Witchcraft. If a person decides to use their occult knowledge and power for "evil", they are said to have chosen the Left Hand Path of Black Magic Witchcraft. The point is, a White Magic practitioner has the same knowledge, has gone through the same rituals, and accesses the same Satanic power as does a Black Magick practitioner. Therefore, Hitler realized that all White Magic folk knew exactly who he was and what occult power he possessed. As White Magic author, Trevor Ravenscroft reveals in his book on Hitler entitled, "The Spear of Destiny", Hitler began a systematic campaign to eradicate all White Magic practitioners in Europe so none could attempt to warn the German people that they had just elected a hard-core Satanist -- a monster -- as President of the Republic. As Ravenscroft names some of the prominent White Magic practitioners Hitler either killed or drove into hiding, he mentioned the plight of the Gypsies, who were rounded up by the entire community and either incarcerated or annihilated. For Hitler to be worried about the Gypsies, they had to have had occult leadership who were high practitioners of the art of Witchcraft. Therefore, Irish Travelers represent one of the greatest examples of Generational Witchcraft. Since their level of witchcraft was sufficient to draw the ire of Adolf Hitler, we know that they practice a fairly high level of this religion. In the section where we show the occult nature of the Travelers, we demonstrate that the Travelers do practice a very high level of witchcraft. Thus, it behooves us to examine the values of witchcraft relating to sexual behavior, because in so doing, we will discover a hidden secret of the Travelers. SATAN'S SEXUAL VALUES AND ATTITUDES Since the occult serves Satan, we should expect they would possess the opposite values toward sex as the Bible proclaims. God designed sex to occur only within His Plan for marriage, i.e., one husband and one wife. This prohibits sex between a man and a woman that are not married, as well as homosexual and lesbian "sex". "Old Testament Israel's covenant law prohibited adultery (Ex. 20:14) and thereby made faithfulness to the marriage relationship central in the divine will for human relationships. Many Old Testament regulations deal with adultery as the adulterous man's offense against the husband of the adulterous wife. Yet both the adulterous man and woman were viewed as guilty, and the punishment of death was prescribed for both (Lev. 20:10). The severity of the punishment indicates the serious consequences adultery has for the divine-human relationship (Ps. 51:4) as well as for marriage, family, and community relationships." [Holman Bible Dictionary] Since God severely restricted human sexuality, we should expect that Satan would remove all restrictions in the groups which serve him; we should also expect that Satan plans to remove all restrictions from the society he plans to create after he overthrows the Judeo-Christian Old World Order, replacing it with the Kingdom of Antichrist, also known as the New World Order. Indeed, this is exactly the case. Listen to the teaching on sexuality from The Satanic Bible, by Anton LaVey. * "No creed must be accepted upon authority of a 'divine' nature ... No moral dogma must be taken for granted -- no standard of measurement deified. There is nothing sacred about moral codes." [Page 31] Since God based His society upon firm dogma, Satan is teaching that no moral dogma is the basis upon which he will establish his coming society. Societies which already serve Satan can be logically expected to already possess this "no rules" attitude. In fact, a number of popular TV advertisements these days, and some computer games, are based upon the motto, "No Rules"! From this point on, you will recognize this attitude as being purely Satanic, even though the producers of these products may vehemently deny they are advocating a Satanic value. Now, back to The Satanic Bible: * "Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence" [Page 25] * "Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse, than those that walk on all-fours ..." [Page 25; NOTE: This is New Age, Illuminist, and Humanist teaching today. As this teaching becomes more prevalent, sexual rules will disappear, just as we expect no sexual rules from dogs in heat] * "Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!" [Page 25] * "No creed must be accepted upon authority of a 'divine' nature ... No moral dogma must be taken for granted -- no standard of measurement deified. There is nothing sacred about moral codes." [Page 31; indeed, when Satanism reaches full force, and becomes public, all laws regarding sexual activity will be abolished] * "The angel of self-deceit is camped in the souls of the 'righteous' -- the eternal flame of power through joy dwelleth within the flesh of the Satanist!" [Page 35; I can imagine that this is the attitude of the occultist within his heart of hearts. He despises the Christian ethic and just cannot wait until the day he can openly act out these Satanic values] * "The seven deadly sins of the Christian Church are: greed, pride, envy, anger, gluttony, lust, and sloth. Satanism advocates indulging in each of these 'sins', as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification." [Page 46] Defending the Sexual Predator and Calling His Actions "Normal" * "Are we not all predatory animals by instinct? If humans ceased wholly from preying upon each other, could they continue to exist? Is not 'lust and carnal desire' a more truthful term to describe 'love' when applied to the continuance of the race? Is not the 'love' of the fawning scriptures simply a euphemism for sexual activity ...?" [Page 33] I find it highly incredible that Anton LaVey defends the sexual predator as he preys on the innocent! He actually defends the predator! LaVey equates selfless "love" in a relationship to "lust and carnal desire". Get used to it, for this is the attitude of the Satanist, and it is a line we shall hear more of in coming days and years. However, remember that members of a society already given over to the values of the occult already possess this type of predatory nature. Moms and Dads should understand that any of their young daughters and sons are just "fair game" for this type of predator, just "steaks on the table". Keep this in mind as we discuss the next subject, toward the end of this article, and to the following article. Now, back to The Satanic Bible: * "Satanism represents a form of controlled selfishness". [Page 51] Just as true love is self-less, Satanic lust is "controlled selfishness". At least, LaVey admits that this is the case. This revelation is from the "horse's mouth", so to speak. * "Satanism is not a white light religion; it is a religion of the flesh, the mundane, the carnal -- all of which are ruled by Satan, the personification of the Left Hand Path." [Page 52] * "You should act upon your natural instincts, and then, if you cannot perform without feeling guilty, revel in your guilt." [Page 53]. This statement is very repugnant, don't you think? "Revel in your guilt" is the lowest form of spiritual advice anyone can give another; yet, do not be deceived, this is the secret residing within the heart of hearts of every occultist. * "Free love, in the Satanic concept, means exactly that -- freedom to either be faithful to one person or to indulge your sexual desires with as many others as you feel it necessary to satisfy your particular needs." [Page 66]. Now, we are getting closer to the subject of Pedophilia within Satanism that is simply exploding in our society today. All Pedophilia is an outgrowth of the Satanic spirit now sweeping this nation, whether it comes from the Catholic priests or within individuals. However, what most people do not realize is that the push toward de-criminalizing Pedophilia is running hot and strong just below the surface, but that is the subject of our next article. * "Satanism does not encourage orgiastic activity or extramarital affairs for those to whom they do not come naturally, For many, it would be very unnatural and detrimental to be unfaithful to their chosen mates. To others, it would be frustrating to be bound sexually to just one person. Each person must decide for himself what form of sexual activity best suits his individual needs." [Page 66] What if the occultist decides that the "form of sexual activity best suits his individual needs" cannot be found with an adult woman, but can only come from a girl less than 12 years of age? Keep this thought in mind as we move to our last section of this article. * "The Satanist realizes that if he is to be a sexual connoisseur (and truly free from sexual guilt) he cannot be stifled by the so-called sexual revolutionists any more than he can by the prudery of his guilt-ridden society ..." [Page 67]. A "sexual connoisseur"? A "connoisseur" is some one who elevates some act to the form of art, or to a professional level. A person becomes a wine "connoisseur" by tasting many types of wine, and then walking away; is a "sexual connoisseur" someone who "tastes" many types of sexual encounters and then walks away? Doubt it not! As we shall demonstrate in our next article, the secret occultists of our time are gathering strength with open practitioners of deviant sexual practices to agitate for laws lowering the minimum age of pornography and sexual activity to 16, and then 14, and then 12 and finally 8 years of age! This trend is getting so strong it is getting difficult to hide it any longer. We shall deal with this issue in our next article. Back to The Satanic Bible: * "Satanism condones any type of sexual activity which properly satisfies your individual desires -- be it heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, or even asexual, if you choose." [Page 67] * "Satanism also sanctions any fetish or deviation which will enhance your sex life ... The prevalence of deviant and/or fetishistic behavior in our society would stagger the imagination of the sexually naive. There are more sexual variants than the unenlightened individual can perceive: transvestitism, sadism, masochism, urolagnia, exhibitionism -- to name only a few of the more predominant." [Pages 67-68] These quotes thoroughly document the sexual values and outlook of a society based on Satanic values. All Judeo-Christian rules are hated and are meant to be abolished in the New World Order now steadily coming upon us. However, within a coven, you would expect that these sexual values are practiced and are given the highest degree of glorification possible. In an occult society based upon these Satanic values, you would expect that the leaders of this society would have these values toward sex as Anton LaVey expressed; they would believe that man is just an animal that needs its sexual needs met, and can meet those needs with anyone willing to fulfill them. This belief also extends to the age of the sex partner. An occultist will not recognize any limit to the age of the sex partner. To see this is true, let us go to the Biblical account of Sodom, at the moment when God's angels arrived at Lot's house. Genesis 19:2-11. God's holy angels [who had taken the form of human men] sent to rescue Lot and his family before God destroyed the cities, spent the evening in Lot's house, where he fixed them dinner. In verse 4, we see quite a spectacle develop. The homosexual men of every part of the city, both young and old, surrounded the house to demand that the male guests in Lot's house come outside. Why did they want these disguised angels to come outside? So they could have sex with them. Now, wait a minute! The homosexual men outside Lot's house intended to have group sex with these 'men' in PUBLIC! In public! In America today, we still have laws that make it illegal for anyone to have sex outside, in public. Many, many public rest stops along our highways have been closed because homosexual men were meeting there and having sex there. We have laws that would have made these men of Sodom fearful of having sex IN PUBLIC. Therefore, because these men showed no fear of being arrested, we can only conclude that, prior to this event, the laws of Sodom had to have been changed, allowing public sex, laws which bestowed a mantle of societal approval upon public sex!! However, notice that the "young men" of Sodom were among those surrounding Lot's house demanding public sex with the Godly angels who had come in the form of men. Therefore, the young men were desiring sex with the angels and of course, were expecting reciprocal sex from the angels. Today, with our society still enforcing Judeo-Christian morality, we call this type of sexual activity with youngsters "pedophilia". The "Taber's Cyclopedic Medical Dictionary, Eighth Edition", defines 'pedophilia' thusly: "A fondness for children; unnatural desire for sexual relations with children." Who called sexual relations with children "unnatural" and forbade it? God, speaking through His Holy Bible. Therefore, this medical dictionary is reflecting the predominate Judeo-Christian values by its definition. Once you step outside Judeo-Christian values, this definition changes, just as it did in Sodom. Since Sodom glorified sex, boy to man, you can bet it encouraged sex, girl to man. In fact, listen to the Holman Bible Dictionary as it describes the full list of sins for which God destroyed these two ancient cities. "The unnatural lusts of the men of Sodom (Gen. 19:4-8; Jude 7) have given us the modern term sodomy, but the city was guilty of a full spectrum of sins including pride, oppression of the poor, haughtiness, and 'abominable things' (Ezek. 16:49-50). Did you get that insight? The Holman Bible Dictionary says that God destroyed the city because it was guilty of a "full spectrum of sins", that God considered "abominable things". When you understand this fact, you will see that America is lurching toward the full gamut of Sodom's sexual sins. Societies based upon the occult will possess this attitude toward sex, even though they may try to keep it quiet. In fact, the smart thing to do is to disguise the sexual activity so the outsider will see it for something other than it really is. On this note, let us go to the final revelation of the society of the 'Travelers". NEWS BRIEF: "Clothing For Little Girls With Sexually-Connotative Lettering", 1/31/01, Rense.com, by Sheryl Jackson. "At the present time there is a body of lobbyists' in Washington, DC, whose agenda is to lower the age of teens for consensual sex to 16. This is not a new lobby. In fact, they claim to have a very wealthy constituency of over a million members. Most of them are really just pedophiles who have a motto of 'sex before eight, before it is too late'. Many of them are also members of a very suspect group of nomadic Americans who call themselves the 'Travelers". This group has been gaining in notoriety in this country, because they have fallen under the heading of 'newsworthy' by the mainstream media. But many of the characteristics and known behaviors of these people (male and female) remain hidden, vague and relatively unknown by the public at large." Wait a minute! This author has just stated that pedophilia runs within the "very suspect group of nomadic Americans who call themselves the 'Travelers'." Since we know that the Travelers is a very tight-knit group of people based upon a powerful practice of White Magic Witchcraft, we know that they probably do share the casual sexual attitude typical of occultists toward children. One South Carolinian citizen did not blink when I asked him if he would find it believable that Travelers encouraged sex with children, and marriage between adult men and girls as young as 8 years old. He said that would explain the odd pairing he had noted within that society. A subscriber recently faxed me a memorandum on a program she was watching that touched on this subject. Listen: "The program I was telling you about was on MSNBC with Ashleigh Banfield on September 23, around midnight. A home video was played showing very young Traveler girls wearing extremely fancy clothes, lots of makeup and big hair. A young girl about 10 or 11 was dancing in a very provocative manner, just unbelievable for a child. It was explained that these were 'parties' for men to choose brides. Then the film jumped to young girls in beautiful wedding gowns dancing with middle aged men. It was explained that these girls were around 12 years old and being married to these men through arranged marriages." Thus, MSNBC reported that the society of Travelers allowed -- or encouraged -- "parties" in which adult men could choose brides from young girls as young as 10 years old! While you might find this unbelievable, it is consistent with the occult values upon which the Travelers are based. This subscriber continued: "In my research this week, I was able to find articles where Charlie Condon, the Attorney General of South Carolina, changed the legal age of female marriages to 14 instead of 12, in response to the problem with Traveler men marrying children. This is well documented and ties in very well with the Washington lobby of wealthy people trying to get the laws changed to have sex with marriage at any age child. NAMBLA has been advocating this for years." TRAVELERS - ILLUMINATI CONNECTION At the top of this article, I mentioned a tie-in between the Travelers and NAMBLA, and this is it. They both are advocating a change in sex laws that would allow sex between an adult and a very young child, all the way down to age 8, "before it is too late". Thus, both these groups are advocating exactly the kind of societal change you would expect an occultist to desire. This change is also exactly what the Illuminati plans to institute once their Christ [Antichrist] is on the world scene. Remember, also, I asked the rhetorical question as to why law enforcement authority does not shut the Travelers down, when they certainly know this type of activity is occurring, and since so many people know that the Travelers make their living through various forms of thievery? This societal immunity to the arm of law enforcement suggests that the Travelers enjoy high-level protection. Since the back of our One Dollar Bill proves our government to be Illuminist [Seminar Two, "America Determines The Flow of History"], can we demonstrate an Illuminist connection to the Travelers? Listen to a former Satanist describe this connection: "Gypsies worship the Hindu goddess, Kali, who has both creation and destruction abilities. Kali's necklace in Indian legend consists of skulls with magical Sanskrit letters. Kali was, and is, worshipped by a great number of people, especially the Hindus. One group of worshippers has been the Thugs, who relate to the Assassins and the Knight Templars. Another group of Kali worshippers are the gypsies who left India in the middle ages and over the next following several hundreds of years traveled all over the world. "One group of people known for their traveling entertainment, the gypsies, have some interesting parallels with the Illuminati bloodlines. A gypsy proverb is, 'If you want to survive, you must be a devil'. Both the gypsies and the Illuminati families are secretive; both groups live double lives. Gypsy children will be given a secret magical name, and a name to use for outsiders, a very common Satanic trait. Gypsy children are often baptized in a magical circle. Both groups are into the practices of the occult, such as 'black magic', the 'evil eye", and white slavery. The gypsies believe in Charani, a big bird consumed by fire who rises from the ashes; the Illuminati calls this bird the 'Phoenix'. Both groups have a secret code that allows them to do anything to outsiders ( who are called "Gad" by gypsies meaning "enemy") The gypsies originated in India and migrated west to Iran and Turkey and then to Greece and then into the western Europe in the 1400s just prior to an occult revival in Europe. Other gypsy societies also worship Kali under different names such as the Black Virgin, for which they make an effigy called 'BIBIACA' which simply means 'LADY'." Thus, you can see the direct tie between Gypsies and the Illuminati bloodline families. Since this is true, Illuminati Mind Control is heavily at work amongst the Travelers as well. The former Satanist, quoted above, also stated that the Travelers prostitute their daughters out to make money, another very common trait of occultists. WAS THIS INCIDENT STAGED? If you wanted to tear down a Judeo-Christian society so you could replace it with a society that has no rules, no strict dogma, and certainly no rules regulating sex, would you not view the core family as your number one target? We have heard many Christian leaders and educators, especially Dr. James Dobson, declare repeatedly that the core family is under specific attack by various forces at work today within our society. What better way to tear Christian families apart than to successfully attack any home that upholds the Biblical teaching on corporal punishment? Before you rush to judgment to say this is not possible, consider the themes coming out of this incident of Madelyne Toogood beating her child: * How terrible it is to strike a child; let us make it a crime. * Homeschooled children are possibly being raised by cultists, criminals, nutcases. * The worst place for a kid is with his own parents. What may happen while we remain fixated on Mrs. Toogood is that courts and legislative bodies may start to make these above themes the law of the land. Just like the raptors in Jurassic Park, you don't have to worry so much about the Raptor in front of you, but you had best beware of the one sneaking up on you from the side or the back. We have to watch carefully in our communities to ensure that this type of restrictive legislation is not passed supposedly to "protect" the children. The most terrible laws have always been passed with the most lofty goals. As we continued to dig for information lying just below the surface concerning this incident of Madelyn Toogood beating her daughter in the public parking lot of Kohl's Department Stores, we found a lot of disturbing information. We discovered that Toogood was a member of a very occult group called the "Irish Travelers", a group that regularly allows sexual contact, even marriage, between adult men and young girls. We discovered that the Travelers tie in with the Gypsies of Ireland and Europe, a deeply occult group tied to the Illuminati. Now that we have this tie-in, we can see why law enforcement does not act upon the detailed information they possess in order to shut this society down for good. Further, we can see how this society might be part of the concerted campaign to bring sex and pornography down to youngsters as young as eight years of age. Truly, Western Society is becoming like Sodom and Gomorra. What was it Jesus said was a sign of the End of the Age? "As in the days of Lot ..." [Luke 17:28-31] Truly, we live in the End of the Age. Are you spiritually ready? Is your family? Are you adequately protecting your loved ones? This is the reason for this ministry, to enable you to first understand the peril facing you, and then help you develop strategies to warn and protect your loved ones. Once you have been thoroughly trained, you can also use your knowledge as a means to open the door of discussion with an unsaved person. I have been able to use it many times, and have seen people come to Jesus Christ as a result. These perilous times are also a time when we can reach many souls for Jesus Christ, making an eternal difference. If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, but have been very lukewarm in your spiritual walk with Him, you need to immediately ask Him for forgiveness and for renewal. He will instantly forgive you, and fill your heart with the joy of the Holy Spirit. Then, you need to begin a daily walk of prayer and personal Bible Study. If you have never accepted Jesus Christ as Savior, but have come to realize His reality and the approaching End of the Age, and want to accept His FREE Gift of Eternal Life, you can also do so now, in the privacy of your home. Once you accept Him as Savior, you are spiritually Born Again, and are as assured of Heaven as if you were already there. Then, you can rest assured that the Kingdom of Antichrist will not touch you spiritually. If you would like to become Born Again, turn to our Salvation Page now. We hope you have been blessed by this ministry, which seeks to educate and warn people, so that they can see the coming New World Order -- Kingdom of Antichrist -- in their daily news. Finally, we would love to hear from you. You can write us at: You can contact us by mail or email. God bless you.

If you've watched the endless interviews with survivors of natural disasters, you may have noticed that the news media representatives, faced with someone who may be too shocked or nervous before the cameras to offer sufficiently compelling testimony, often do some gentle prompting. "When you saw your home destroyed, were you just devastated?" "You've never seen anything like this before, have you?" "Your whole life changed in that moment, didn't it?" Not everyone who survived a disaster is YouTube clip-ready, so some need to be coached. There was one such interview after the tornado ran through Moore, Oklahoma that got some attention. Interviewing a woman as they stood before the tangled pile of debris that used to be her home and discussed her family's narrow escape, CNN's Wolf Blitzer said, "You guys did a great job. I guess you got to thank the Lord. Right?" When she hesitated, Blitzer pressed on. "Do you thank the Lord for that split-second decision?" She paused for a moment before responding, "I'm actually an atheist." Awkward laughs ensued. Blitzer's assumption was understandable; most Americans profess a faith in God, and there is an awful lot of Lord-thanking after a natural disaster. Atheists find this puzzling, to say the least; if God deserves your thanks and praise for being so merciful as to allow you to live through the tornado, maybe He could have been kind enough not to destroy your home and kill 24 of your neighbors in the first place. But at times of crisis, everyone looks for comfort where they can find it. It's often said that there are no atheists in foxholes, and I suppose Wolf Blitzer thought the same would be true of tornadoes. But when you stop to think about that old expression, you realize how insulting it is, not just to those who don't believe in an almighty but also to those who do. It says that the primary basis for religious faith is fear of death, and one's beliefs are so superficial that they are a function only of the proximity of danger. If you believe only because there's an enemy army or a tornado bearing down on you, you don't believe. Wolf Blitzer will no doubt be more careful next time. And perhaps he'll learn that those who hold to no religion are a fast-growing group, as many as one in six Americans in most polls, so there's at least a fair chance that the next disaster survivor he interviews will also be an atheist. Some of those secular folks are becoming more open about it as their numbers increase; for instance, when last week it came Arizona state representative Juan Mendez's turn to open the legislative session with a prayer, he instead chose an eloquent invocation of "my secular humanist tradition," including a quote from Carl Sagan. Afterward, Mendez said, "I hope today marks the beginning of a new era in which Arizona's non-believers can feel as welcome and valued here as believers." It's a nice thought, but it may take a while. There are signs of progress, though. Last week, Pope Francis made news around the world when in a homily, he delivered to his flock the shocking news that atheists are capable of doing good. They may not get to heaven, but on this planet they are not necessarily gripped by evil. This was certainly a step in the direction of mutual understanding that his predecessor was not inclined to make; Pope Benedict was aggressively hostile to those who don't believe in God, essentially blaming the crimes of the Third Reich on atheism. But I was surely not the only atheist who was a little underwhelmed by Francis' generosity of spirit. Atheists are capable of goodness? How kind of him to say. If you heard a man say, "You may not believe it, but women can be intelligent," you probably wouldn't respond, "What an admirable statement of his commitment to equality—thanks, Mr. Feminist!" But the bar is pretty low for religious leaders; we expect them to hold that all who do not share their particular beliefs are doomed to an eternity of the cruelest punishments the divine mind can devise. We speak of religious "tolerance" as the most we can expect when it comes to the treatment of other people's religions. But we "tolerate" not that which we love or respect but that which is unpleasant, painful, or worthy of mild contempt. We tolerate things which we'd just as soon see disappear. You tolerate a hangnail. Nevertheless, we can give the Pope credit for making a start, even if in public life the most vapid expressions of faith will continue to be the norm. Singers will thank the Lord for delivering unto them a Grammy, smiting the hopes of the other nominees, who are plainly vile in His sight. Football players will gather to pray before a last-second field goal, in the hopes that God will alter his divine plan in their favor and push the ball through the goalposts. And presidents Democratic and Republican will end every speech with "And may God bless the United States of America." As The Atlantic's James Fallows has noted many times, this utterly content-free bit of religiosity means nothing more than "This speech is now over." I don't know if hearing that at the end of a speech makes anyone feel more reassured or hopeful about our country's future. Perhaps it does. But that woman Wolf Blitzer interviewed? The group Atheists Unite put out a call to help her family rebuild their house, setting a goal of raising $50,000. They're already approaching $100,000. She no doubt feels thankful, but she'll be thanking her fellow human beings. 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Shirley MacLaine to receive AFI Life Achievement Award Oscar-winner Shirley MacLaine has been selected to receive the American Film Institute’s 40th Life Achievement Award, the AFI’s highest honor for a career in film. MacLaine’s younger brother, Warren Beatty, received the AFI honor in 2008. “What is not to love about Shirley MacLaine,” said Bob Gazzale, the president and CEO of AFI. “The challenge will be how to fit it all into one evening because hers is a life that has gone from movies to television to Broadway, books and beyond. She defines the term renaissance woman and what an honor for the AFI to shine a proper light to all she’s given the world. Then when you get into her films, it’s across genres, it’s across decades. This is a force of nature all to our benefit." MacLaine, 77, will receive her award at a gala tribute on June 7. TV Land will broadcast the tribute sometime later that month. In addition to Beatty, previous recipients of the award include Tom Hanks, Martin Scorsese, Meryl Streep, Barbra Streisand, Morgan Freeman, Kirk and Michael Douglas, Sidney Poitier, Alfred Hitchcock, James Cagney and Jimmy Stewart. MacLaine, who made her film debut in Hitchcock’s 1955 dark comedy “The Trouble With Harry,” has starred in more than 50 feature films, earned six Oscar nominations, winning lead actress for 1983’s “Terms of Endearment” and received seven Golden Globes including the Cecil B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award. A bestselling author, her latest book, “I’m All Over That -- and Other Confessions,” was published this year, and this fall MacLaine received France’s cultural award, the Legion of Honor. She began her career in the early 1950s dancing in a revival of the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical “Oklahoma!.” As understudy for star Carol Haney in 1954 in the musical "The Pajama Game," MacLaine took the stage the night producer Hal B. Wallis was in the audience. He took notice of MacLaine and she was signed to a contract at Paramount. MacLaine earned her first Oscar nomination for 1958’s “Some Came Running” and her second for Billy Wilder’s 1960 best picture winner “The Apartment.” She and Wilder reteamed for 1963’s “Irma La Douce,” which netted her another nomination. She was nominated for lead actress once again for 1977’s “The Turning Point,” before finally winning for “Terms of Endearment.” MacLaine also was nominated for producer of the 1975 feature documentary “The Other Half of the Sky.” Among her recent films are 2010’s “Valentine’s Day” and the upcoming “Bernie.” Photo: AFI Life Achievement Award recipient Shirley MacLaine. Credit: Michel Spangler/AP

Hello and welcome to Wednesday. Is it really only Wednesday. Oh Lord, help me. No. Okay. I am off tomorrow, finally. Just still trying to unwind this large knot of stress and distraction that seems to have built up over the past few weeks. With the weight of inventory off my shoulders the process can, at last, begin. Today, having put in umpteen hours at work already, I left a tad early. I was able to lay out by the pool and read my trashy book and all is starting to feel right in the world. Traditionally, after summer inventory I schedule a massage. It’s my annual treat and I look forward to it muchly. I have yet to schedule the thing, but it is definitely forthcoming. I think, for tomorrow we are actually going to finally hit the lake. I am very excited about this, since June is half gone and I still have yet to climb aboard our boat. That’s just wrong. Today’s outfit is like a big happy band-aid for all that ails me. An easy fix? Totally. But did it get the job done? Absolutely. What’s not to love about a fantastic skirt and a big old belt? I say nothing. Which is why, in spite of how Godawful tired I was this morning, regardless of my mile-long to-do list, inventory anxiety be damned, (without heed for this run-on sentence from hell) I left the house with a spring in my step and a smile on my face. There’s something about dressing up mid-week. Especially around here and in the summer, when everyone is super casual. So few people go for putting on the ritz, but those of us that do are like a secret society. This morning, while gassing up my car at a quarter to nine, I stood next to a woman in the most lovely printed wrap dress. We smiled at each other like co-conspirators, in on the joke. It was a vanity party and we were both invited! Still, I’ll be the first person to admit it. After a rough week, feeling pretty feels pretty good to me. Blouse – Can’t Remember Skirt – Thrifted Shoes – Work Belt – Work Title courtesy of Carly Simon – “You’re So Vain”

Okay, so I must admit that I was a little surprised when I saw that it has been 24 days since my last blog post. Wow……there goes that New Years resolution! While I’m pretty bummed that I let it go so long….I promise, I actually have been productive. I finished my woman cave (a/k/a my office, a/k/a my writing spot). It’s been awesome! I’ve been doing research, including reading different aged children’s books to get an idea of what age group I would like to target. I’ve really done quite a bit. In fact, I even FINISHED MY FIRST DRAFT! I just couldn’t stop myself last night. The words just kept coming, so I just let them. I’m feeling very proud of myself, but I’m dreading the next stage. Revision. I know how important this stage is, so I need to make sure and do it right. I’d like to also work more on my characters as well. So my question for all of you is, do you have any tips or suggestions on the revision process? I’ve read that it’s usually good to let a bit of time go by in between revisions, but I would love some more pointers to help me along the way. As always, thanks!

CBR News: Robbie, when you picked up with Cindy Moon in “Silk” #1, it felt like she was returning to a life full of problems. In a way was the “Spider-Verse” event to kind of a vacation for her from her problems? Robbie Thompson: [Laughs] That’s an interesting way of putting it. I like that. Yeah, she went from being locked away for 10 years to having an interdimensional adventure. That’s a pretty perilous vacation, but also a pretty sweet one! One of the first conversations I had with my editor Nick Lowe about this book was that we were obviously going to be coming off the events of a pretty massive, wide-ranging, multi comic book event and in terms of matching the scale, it doesn’t get much bigger than “Spider-Verse!” So Nick wanted a grounded focus for the book and I thought that was a great idea. He wanted it to be a more personal story about Cindy getting her sea legs and learning what it’s like to be a hero. To me, that focus on learning to be a hero, plus Stacey Lee and colorist Ian Herring’s art, gave the book an almost “Ms. Marvel”vibe. I’ll take that as an enormous compliment. “Ms. Marvel” is one of the best books on the shelf. I love that book. It’s fantastic. Coming back from “Spider-Verse” means Cindy has to confront a multitude of problems. Perhaps her biggest one is interacting with people. People are social animals. Did Cindy suffer any emotional or physiological damage by being locked in that bunker for so long? One of the things that I really wanted to explore and examine was what that inner journey by herself did to her inner monologue. It’s taken an emotional toll on her and she’s going to be slowly dealing with that over the first arc. She was launched out of a cannon into this massive event. Adrenaline only takes you so far and once that wears off you have to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “Where is my life now? What am I doing? Who am I? What happened to the last 10 years?” So that’s something that’s slowly creeping in on her and it’s going to be affecting her on an emotional level. Does Cindy have any self-esteem issues? Because the way she sort of bailed on her roommate in issue #1 made it almost feel like she thought she wasn’t worthy of being around her. I don’t know if it was self-esteem issues in that regard. She’s definitely battling some inner demons. It’s really more about the fact that when you’ve been alone that long, socializing with people and the interactions that you have are a challenge. She’s not used to having anybody respond. Her conversations have been pretty one sided. So it’s going to lead to her having some awkward moments, as you see in the first issue. It’s also going to lead to her having some confrontations. Cindy’s journey is not just about her figuring out who she is as a superhero, it’s also about her figuring out who she is as a person. I imagine her fluctuating powers are not helping with all the problems she’s wrestling with. Yes, she’s definitely got an issue going on with her powers. It’s something we’re going to explore in this first arc. Coming off the events of “Spider-Verse,” it’s going to be something that’s presenting a challenge for her and it’s something she’s going to have to figure out. Silk’s powers weren’t completely problematic in issue #1. It looked like you gave her a new power in the form of claws and made her organic web spinning even more useful, because she was able to spin a full set of civilian clothes with the ability. We decided to expand on some of the ideas that were hinted at in her first run of appearances in both “Amazing Spider-Man” and “Spider-Woman.” The claws are a refined version of her ability to shoot at webs from her finger tips. Then the clothing was something that came out of a conversation I had with Nick. At least I believe it was Nick’s idea. It could have been a Dan Slott idea. It was something we thought would be a fun addition. In “Silk” #1, Cindy used her powers to take on a member of the Black Cat’s burgeoning criminal empire. What made you want to continue the enmity between Silk and the Cat that Dan Slott started over in “Amazing Spider-Man?” What do you find most interesting about the Cat’s current villainous status quo? I think Felicia is an amazing character and I love the Black Cat. This was something that me, Nick Lowe, and the rest of the team thought would give the feeling that Cindy is part of the larger Spider-Man universe, but also carving out her own place in it. So it felt like the Black Cat was a good opposite number and she’ll be back in a couple issues. The cover to issue #3 hints that she’s going to be a pretty significant adversary in this first run. You’ve also added to the Cat’s criminal organization by giving her a new and very interesting employee in the form of the Repairman. Is he a new character you created? To me it looks like he was inspired by Spider-Man’s old foe, the Tikerer. Yes, the Repairman is brand new and to a certain extent there is definitely some Tinkerer in that character. He’s been fun to write. Readers didn’t just meet new villainous characters in Cindy’s costumed life. “Silk” #1 also introduced us to Cindy’s family via flashbacks. The glimpse we got suggested that they were a loving, and perhaps a little overprotective, family unit. In the scenes we see them they’re definitely shocked to hear that Cindy has been dating, but I think she had a lot of freedom in her life. There was some tension with her mom about the fact that Cindy underperformed with her grades and kind of skated by because she has this great memory and all this other stuff. It’s actually somewhat based on my own experience as a student. I never truly applied myself back at North Farmington High School. [Laughs] So it was a little inspired by that. I wouldn’t say that her background was completely strict and regimented. Her grades were sort of a hot button issue with her parents at a time just before a pretty cataclysmic event happened to her. Since the glimpse we got of the Moon family showed them to be very close, I’m sure many readers are wondering a number of questions, including, what did Cindy’s parents and brother do when she went into Ezekiel’s bunker? Why they aren’t they looking for her? And why is Cindy having such a hard time tracking them down? We’re going to dive into a lot of that, but it’s a story we really want to give the chance to unfold. You’re going to get glimpses of her past and life in the issues to come. We’ll slowly start to piece together not only what happened to her family, but we’re also going to explore the things that lead her to lock herself away in a bunker. Will we actually get to spend some time in the bunker with Cindy? It feels like there’s some interesting territory to explore there. Like did she have a “Wilson” style companion to help her with the loneliness, like Tom Hanks had in the movie “Castaway?” [Laughs] It’s funny you mention Wilson and “Castaway.” We play a little bit with that in this first issue and I’m hoping we can play a little bit more with it. In some ways her Wilson was the prerecorded videos she had of Ezekiel that were set up in “Amazing Spider-Man.” She’s memorized all of them and she can respond to them in different ways. She can have conversations with them and have a different one every single time. As soon as I got this gig I poured over those pages of teases of Silk in those first four issues of this latest volume of “Amazing Spider-Man.” So I wanted to see those videos again, and she has the anklet, that we flash back to her getting in this issue, in one of her first appearances as well. So “Silk” is a book about a new superhero learning the ropes, but it’s also a series about a woman trying to uncover the mystery and make sense of what happened to her and her family? Absolutely, I’ve got to give credit to Nick Lowe and [former Marvel/current Vertigo editor] Ellie Pyle, who was on the book when we first started. They really wanted to tell a really grounded and personal story, and I thought it was such a great way to go. I was so excited to write it, and as I said before, in terms of scale it’s pretty hard to compete with something like “Spider-Verse,” which I was a huge fan of. I had so much fun reading the books that made up that story line. There were so many fantastic Spider-Ham puns in “Amazing” #14 and I loved how it turned out. But with regards to Cindy’s story this just felt like a good way to really ground her character and explore both who she is and her history and then use that to kind of pivot into where she’s going next. We touched upon Stacey Lee and Ian Herring’s art earlier, but I wanted to circle back and talk a little more. I loved the mood and tone of Stacey and Ian’s pages. They were both introspective and fun. Yeah I can’t say enough good things about both Stacey and Ian. As a new comic book writer getting to see the various pages at the different stages: the layouts, the refined art, and then to see what the coloring and lettering adds has been an education. It’s also been a real joy. One of things we wanted to do with this book is strike a tone evocative of the heavy history Cindy is dealing with, but at the same time we wanted the book to be fun. We want to retain the fun you see in her interactions with the various Spider characters and Peter in “Amazing Spider-Man” and “Spider-Woman.” So it’s one thing to kind of write that tone, but it really comes down to the artist to nail it visually. I think our team did a great job. It’s not out yet, but there’s a transition panel in issue #2 that Stacey drew that goes from a pretty sad moment to a fun and more pulpy one. She just nailed it and I can’t wait to see what Ian does with the colors on that. It’s a really great, fun piece of art and a great bit of storytelling from Stacey. Speaking of fun, how much fun did you have writing both Spider-Man and J. Jonah Jameson in “Silk” #1? The very first meeting I had with Nick we were talking about the book and what they wanted to see from Cindy Moon post “Spider-Verse,” and they discussed it in terms of “casting” the book; who can be in it. The whole time I was dancing around going, “Uh . . .uh” and Nick was like, “It’s cool: Peter will definitely be in the book. And given what Cindy’s job is, you’ll get to write J. Jonah Jameson as well.” I won’t lie to you, that was an absolute childhood dream come true, and I don’t think it’s a spoiler to say that you’ll definitely see those guys again. Every time I get a chance to write for Peter Parker or Spider-Man it’s one of those pinch me moments. I still can’t believe that I got to do it. In issue #4, I’m getting to write a group of characters that I’ve wanted to write since I was seven years old. Let’s talk a little more about what’s coming up in immediate issues. It looks like Cindy will run afoul of Hydra in March’s “Silk” #2. Cindy’s quest to find her family will bring her face to face with some familiar Marvel characters, and in issue #2 she encounters someone or something from Hydra’s past. Then, as you mentioned earlier, Silk’s battle with the Black Cat heats up in April’s #3. Yes, we’ll definitely see her take on the Black Cat in issue #3. Then in May’s issue #4 she gets to hang out with those characters I’ve wanted to write since I was a kid, the Fantastic Four. Writing that issue was one of the greatest moments of my life. The cover to issue #4 is gorgeous. Dave Johnson has been doing an awesome job. It features Silk and the Human Torch. So obviously you know what that history is going to bring up. Issue #4 hits in May, which is when “Secret Wars” begins and the Marvel Universe is swept clean. What’s it like writing these first few issues with that looming? I imagine this is something you planned for. Yes, it was something that they told me about in the very first meeting that I had. I’m not sure if I can say anything about “Secret Wars” without being shot by Nick Fury, but it was always part of our plan in terms of breaking the first and second arc. So “Secret Wars” was not a surprise when it was announced. It was something that Nick and Ellie made me aware of from the get go. It’s something that we were actively making sure we’re moving towards. I can’t wait for people to see this book. And please hit me up on Twitter and let me know what you think! “Silk” has been so much fun to work on, but I’ve been working on it since Comic-Con. I won’t believe it’s out until I see it in stores. It still feels like someone is going to tell me this was all a dream. So I’m really excited for people to see the book and I hope I do the character justice. “Silk” #1 is on sale now from Marvel Comics.

Salil returned one morning after a whole year. Rani led him to the guest room where Nayan sat with her mother, singing Bhairavi. Ratri sang and Nayan followed her notes. Salil stood quietly at the door, listening. Their voices seemed to be coming from the core of a conch shell. They resonated, tapping the walls of their consciousness, searching perhaps for a shared epiphany. He knew he would take these voices with him on his journeys. They would come back to him and echo like sweet memory in the hollow caves of his days where he would hide away from the ratty world, writing his ghazals. Nayan with her eyes closed looked… complete? Quiet? Ethereal? No, he did not have the right word at hand in that moment. Her hair fell loose down her back as always. Wavy, brownish-black curls now shone red, now gold in the early She looked mature. Salil realized she looked older than the last time he had seen her. Her fi ngers were constantly strumming the tanpura strings. The youthful restlessness of her fi ngers was gone. He remembered going to Gandharv Mahavidyalaya, where she performed once in a while with her friends, to hear her sing. She would play distractedly for a while and stop in between while singing; perhaps she was too conscious of her surroundings then. Now, she looked complete, and serene, singing after her mother. Her hobby was turning into her vocation. Suddenly, he felt an urge to leave. He would have slipped away had Rani not appeared with a cup of tea. Salil had never met Rani. In fact, this was the fi rst time he had come to Nayan’s house. He got a little fl ustered and stood where he was, tightening his hold on the freshly bound book he had brought with him. After leaving Delhi, Salil had not really made an effort to keep in touch with her, except sending some letters but those had also been erratic. He had missed her though. Missed her voice, her disjointed, meaningless and meaningful chatter, the sudden aloof silences in between sentences, and the rare but uncontrollable laughter after which she would suddenly start humming a song, closing into herself, shutting the doors of her private universe, that invisible city inside her which no one had a key to. She was his secret raga. She had played in his thoughts on his aimless journeys. She had chased after him like an apparition in his poetry. Lingered in the air around him, like the scent of a woman whose perfume stays on in your room long after she has left. He had often mistaken other girls in new places for Nayan. They had all seemed like her at fi rst glance, but totally alien the next moment. There were very few like her. Maybe none. Nayan meant so many things to him. She meant a world of songs, one for each mood, for every season. She meant reading together from a pocketbook edition of Divan-e-Ghalib. She meant pink-skied and burnished evenings when she sang some of those ghazals for him. She meant moments when he thought all his moorings had dissolved, for meeting her had freed him in more ways than one. Yet, she was the only one who could make him return to herself again and again. He had been with other women before. They had brought him pleasure and trouble and all kinds of other things, and he had moved away from their worlds, not wanting to drop anchor. The thought of going back to see them always tired him. They were all women of the world, demanding and forever gushing. Nayan, he thought, was like the secret preserver of mindmaps; she understood or could make allowances for any kind of irrationality. She was like a gatekeeper to his generation’s undecipherable melancholia. He liked her small, inexplicable sorrows and her fetishes for little things like the perfect bookmark, a certain tree on a certain street in central Delhi, or a box of fi rst fl ush tea that her grandfather sent her from Assam every birthday. Making love to her was like reading in a new language, in a new script each time. It annoyed him sometimes that she asked him innumerable questions in bed; that she wanted to know about all the places he had travelled to, down to every single detail, that she planned imaginary trips with him to the hills, forests, rivers, the seaside just when they were in the thick of things. As their bodies moved in a newfound sync, they mapped new territories of love and want. He adored that her hair got caught in his watch each time and there ensued a little struggle in the dark to extricate it from his ‘time’ as she referred to it. Why couldn’t he just throw the damn watch away? It had stopped years ago and he hadn’t had it fi xed, but he wore it every single day, all the time, except in They read for hours from a new book each time after they made love. They both read obsessively; their bodies were made of books, Nayan said to him in jest sometimes. She would move on to other ideas soon. She would like very much for their bodies to be made of laughter. Feverish but sparkling, sharp-edged laughter. That body of books or laughter, when he entered, gave his hands the power to turn her skin around in his hands as if she were clay. She could be a new woman, a different body each time. Their little obsessions and inadequacies had brought them together. They could walk through life, holding hands, strolling across innumerable seasons in time. But an irrepressible urge to fl ee from a settled nest, an aching discontent with familiarity caused him to escape every time. He needed grief in his life to live it, to move on. He needed emptiness and disorder around him, so that he could go on living, wading through time, travelling away from those who knew him to those who did not. Rani came up then, dragging a cane chair and softly whispered, ‘Bhaiya, sit down and listen. How long will you stand?’ Salil sat near the door, making sure the two singers would not see him if they happened to open their eyes. Ratri led her on, lining the notes, adorning the imaginary form of Bhairavi, the dark goddess, with jewels from her voice. At some point, the goddess emerged in fl esh and blood and held her hand. Ratri began walking with the goddess, tracing back her feet in time, to her youth in Guwahati, to Kamakhya, to Kalchini, to her school. In her mind’s eye, she saw herself with many other girls her age, dancing the Bihu. They all went in a half circle, then back, and then a full circle. Very slowly, as if in a trance, dancing to songs that could not Then Nayan tripped on a note, as if she were uncertain, not knowing whether there lay a ground beneath her feet. She coughed, trying to clear her throat, groping for the right notes. A deep inner emptiness surged upwards from her navel and gurgled in her throat. Several shades of one note emerged in a tangle and jostled each other. Then came a sequence of notes. She tried to catch the end of that string of surs. It was trailing like the tail of a torn kite in the agitated hollow within her. She felt as though her voice was stretching its hands to grab the string, but it kept slipping away. She tried humming in a parched voice but choked again. Like she had choked when she had tried smoking…? She had lit up one of the stubs from her father’s ashtray, she had told Salil once. She had always been curious about cigarettes. Then she had choked again at Qutab complex, while she sat with Salil near the second minar; that unfi nished Alai Minar. Nayan fi nally regained her ground, retrieving her voice from the cobwebs of her mind perhaps. She was singing smoothly now, the rishabh, the gandhar, dhaivat and nishad fl owing in sweet camaraderie. The songs of Bhairavi were parting from their voices like fl owers and wafting in the house like perfume. They were singing in unison now – mother and daughter. Two souls in communion. The Guru and the disciple. #loverslikeyouandi on http://www.flipkart.com/lovers-like-you/p/itmdqywhbz8sgbz8

Dinner!!!! Sweet potato fry goals with a side of veggie burger, and quinoa mix. Delish ! I made my fries simply with a little sprinkle of cinnamon in my air fryer and then I drizzled with some @madhavasweet maple agave. Sooo good 🤤 #Repost @4biddenknowledge (@get_repost) #Cancers have become an animal welfare issue and can affect the public's perception of the quality of meat that enters the human food chain. It is an unacceptable practice to "keep the cow until the calf is weaned" or to "keep the sheep until the fleece is shorn", if the animal is suffering from a malignant tumour. If malignant tumours are found in animals slaughtered the meat is still sold to the public. For this reason alone you should consider a #PlantbasedDiet . Music is "528 Hz Reflections" by @4biddenknowledge You really can't get anything better then @dellabowls ! My go to order is their Mediterranean bowl which is amazing! My friend completely agrees cause she got the same thing! It has brown rice, hummus, chickpeas, kale, sprouts and its topped with the most delicious sauce, citrus tahini! #dellabowls When people think all #vegans eat is boring salads 😂 homemade taco salad for dinner; I sprayed cooking oil on both sides of a flour tortilla and baked on 350° until crispy. Topped the lettuce with Zatarain's Red Beans and Rice (yes its vegan), black beans, homemade chipotle salsa, tomatoes, green onions, sweet red peppers, jalapeno's, and black olives. The only thing missing is guacamole (ran out of 🥑) 😍 Muffins are done! If you like zucchini bread I highly recommend this recipe from @cookieandkate they turned out great and can easily be made vegan (see pic for proof 😏) I am never disappointed with cookieandkate.com. I got her new cookbook and it is awesome 👏 go check her out cookieandkate.com and yes the pic only had 10 muffins I ate the others. Quality check (cough cough) 😘 “Good nutrition creates health in all areas of our existence. All parts are interconnected"–T. Collin Campbell.As you know, I survived 2 eating disorders and opted to have a healthier life for both my mind and body. That's why I chose to live a #vegan lifestyle, for I know is healthier for my body and is way better for my fellow #earthlings . It has helped me tremendously mainly because I eat with no regrets for not being the cause an innocent creature suffered and a healthy relationship with food so I finally ate what my body asks without numbers. However not everything is 🌹 color, saying “I'm vegan" without supplementing a certain vitamins can be really bad.Though we get a lot of nutrients from food, there are some that a vegan diet cannot give you (#B12 ) so you must take supplements for that (#vegetarian people eat that in 🧀🍳🍼) I still have trouble adjusting to being #healthy . I'm told I'm healthy AF but I'm not, although I love food there are times I cut my calorie intake from my diet(and I have a very active lifestyle) cause humans are children of habits,I'm used to cut food because I don't feel “sick enough".That let me with a slowly recovery from my #ED even after almost 2 years cause when I am healthy I get cocky and think I'm a dietitian. Changing diets and calorie intake affects my body forcing me to switch from veganism to vegetarianism.Today I realized anaemic Viv is back cause I didn't feel anaemic enough as when I was 70 lbs(even then I didn't feel that sick)I'm a pretty fragile woman since birth and I still damage myself.The message here is, please check your nutrients cause even if you're an omnivore,you may lack nutrients.Do blood tests every few months,we're no dietitians and we think we are cause we're not lying in our deathbed sickly. Supplements are there for you,don't get cocky and listen to your body, eat a 🌈 of fruits and vegetables,grains and protein.Ditch processed food and eat a #wholefooddiet Remember health is your biggest wealth(I take powder mutivitaminic,collagen,#nooch pills,iron and flaxseed Omega daily) #plantbaseddiet#govegan#nourish#strongnotskinny#naturegoodies#vegansofig#crueltyfree#compassionateliving I have been receiving the cutest messages from you guys telling me you've been loving my stories/updates on my trip and that makes me SO HAPPY! I am more than just a marble slab and a piece of avocado toast so I'm thankful you guys appreciate seeing the other side of my life! It's our last night in Boston and it is raining! We're also exhausted from a lot of walking earlier today and just want to relax. Blaze Pizza (they have vegan cheese!) is across the street from our hotel @revereboston so we went back and now we're chilling and watching Netflix. Revere Hotel has a Netflix app on their TV system so we were able to just log in and watch ALL DA SHOWS! We are glad that we didn't end up lugging our laptops/HDMI cords because this hotel literally has everything and I'm so damn happy about it! Enjoy your night guys! #wealsohavecocktails#BeRevered This is the reason I don't eat meat. This face is so sweet, the personality so adorable, the love is so strong. She makes me laugh every day! She's so intelligent! I can no longer imagine killing an animal for another meal. #plantbaseddiet#pigsarefriendsnotfood#loveapig Idk how long I've said this! All those companies are marketing schemes! They sell you a dream to profit off of. They make you believe what you're selling is beneficial to your health, when reality is if you want to lose weight do it the natural way & the weight and your mood changes dramatically! A plant based diet is the safest & healthiest way to go! 🖕🏻all those detox tea companies & any other company that fools so many! I guess I won't knock their hustle though..some have to get their money bags & I guess in some ways they're smart because they get those coins! . #Repost @vintage_vegan_ (@get_repost) Idk how this company still exist! I will forever spread awareness of how toxic it is. Go read http://www.ancestral-nutrition.com/an-unbiased-review-of-herbalife/ Even though I eat the same thing every weekday for breakfast, it's still one of my favourite meals 💯 Protein oats with cacao, goji berries and protein peanut butter! 🤤 Made a few posts dedicated to my oats recipe and wrote it up (link in bio) too. I change it up slightly every now and again depending how my appetite is going in the mornings. Seriously the best breakfast. Andddd nails also kind of match the bowl 😂 polish is Frizzy Logic by Kester Black. I love how so many people in Asheville care. They care about the environment, they care about what they're eating, they care about supporting local. This place is magic. On a similar note, I've been interested in trying out more of a plant-based diet. Anyone got any good recipes to share? 🤞 If anybody caught my story last week, you would have seen me make a chili with a bunch of leftover veggies I had! We got some onions, yellow squash, eggplant, bell peppers, beans, corn, and of course tomatoes. This large pot of chili saved me this week, I was so busy with finishing my summer semester and final projects I didn't cook much! One more semester to go before I finish my masters and dietetic internship ✔️ PS served this chili with greens (always) and @eatbanza which I had never tried before but I highly recommend it is amazing 👌🏼

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Lake Oswego mourns mom, daughter killed in Christmas Day crash Mourners gathered at Our Lady of the Lake Catholic Parish on Wednesday to say goodbye to a Lake Oswego woman and her 12-year-old daughter who were killed on Christmas Day when their Nissan Versa lost traction and crossed into the path of an oncoming Subaru Outback on snowy Highway 26 in Wasco County. Deirdre Lynne Mackey, 48, and her daughter, Lake Oswego Junior High sixth-grader Grace Misztal, were remembered by family and friends as "angels on Earth who embraced love to the fullest extent and filled every day with celebration." People of all ages sat solemnly at the memorial, including Misztal's classmates and friends, family members, community members and members of their church family at Our Lady of the Lake, where Mackey and Misztal attended services for many years. Father John Kerns led the service with a theme of trusting in God and healing through Him. He spoke directly to Misztal's friends and the many other children in the pews. "As an adult, I am so sorry that you have to grow up faster than we would ever want you to," he said. "You will always carry her in your hearts through the memories you have of her." Kerns said that if this tragedy were to befall anyone else, Mackey would be the first person to step in and help. "She had a heart for service, and I am inspired by her," he said. He emphasized that if anyone needs help coping with the tragic loss, the Our Lady of the Lake church community would be there with open arms, just as Mackey and Misztal were for others. The mother and daughter were pronounced dead at the scene of the Christmas Day accident on Highway 26. The driver of the Subaru was identified as Portland resident Darrow Geordan Rupp, 41; he and his passenger, 39-year-old Maria Suzanne Veltman, were transported to Legacy Emanuel Medical Center for non-life threatening injuries and have since been released. The two-vehicle crash, which was reported to the Oregon State Police at around 3:25 p.m. on Dec. 25, closed Highway 26 just east of the intersection with Highway 35 for more than 10 hours while the OSP, ODOT and the Hoodland Fire Department responded. Driving too fast for the conditions is being considered as a factor in the crash, although OSP Lt. Bill Fugate told The Review that an investigation is ongoing. Mackey's sister, Jasper Lotus Hawkins, said the women were on their way to Bend to share Christmas with their family when the accident occurred. "Deirdre and Grace shined brightly in their lives with joy and love and made this world a more beautiful place for all who knew them," Hawkins said. "We cannot imagine the world without them in it." Mackey was a program manager and financial specialist with the American Federation of Teachers in Oregon. In a statement on the organization's website, her co-workers shared their thoughts about her. "Deirdre was warm and caring, always willing to help a co-worker — or a stranger — at a moment's notice," the statement said. "Deirdre was a skilled project manager and all-around talent, committed to social justice and the union movement. She was our friend. Deirdre and Grace will be missed dearly." Mackey also helped manage communications and organize meetings for Respond to Racism, a grassroots group that formed in Lake Oswego over the summer. Shava Feinstein, one of the organization's leaders, said Mackey "demonstrated warmth, compassion and kindness to her friends and members of the Lake Oswego community." "Her compassion for humankind was recognized in her work to end racism in both the local and broader communities," said Feinstein, who added that Respond to Racism would devote part of its next meeting on Jan. 8 to remembering Mackey. "Words cannot begin to explain the loss we all feel as we process this tragedy." Lake Oswego Junior High Principal Sara Deboy said crisis response teams were at Oak Creek Elementary and LOJ on Tuesday when students returned from winter break. "Teams of counselors were available to speak with students and teachers who felt the need for support or who may have needed a quiet space," Deboy said. The school also covered one wall of the sixth-grade wing with paper so that students could share memories of their classmate, who was described as "the kind of student teachers love to have." "Her enthusiasm and passion for life were infectious. Grace cared deeply for her friends and approached relationships with her teachers in the same loving manner," said Heather Nelson, Grace's Study Skills teacher. "Sloth, as she liked to be called because of her love for the animal, is a presence I wish the world could have experienced. Being her teacher, even for just a short time, brought me so much joy." Heather Bryant, Grace's language arts and social studies teacher, said the sixth-grader "had a way of knowing just what those around her needed, whether it be a sloth picture on a rough day (a favorite of hers) or reaching out to a classmate that needed academic help or just a buddy to eat lunch with." "Rarely have I encountered a sixth-grader so selfless and kind," Bryant said, a sentiment echoed by technology teacher Beckie Plaza. "If you saw Grace from across the room, you would notice her long dark hair and serious expression. She would be focused on the task at hand, wanting to do her best — unless someone next to her needed help. Then Grace would patiently help her neighbor and give of her time, even if it meant she walked out of class with homework," Plaza said. "Grace was a champion to the underdog, a listener, a thinker, a dreamer. There was so much to Grace you would never know if you only saw her from across the room." The family has asked that in lieu of flowers, donations be made to Oregon Bravo Youth Orchestras and the Zoological Wildlife Conservation Center. Mackey's sister told The Review that Grace was inspired by sloths and had celebrated a recent birthday feeding the animals with her mom. "Our family is grieving and desperate to feel the warmth they wrapped around us," Hawkins wrote on Facebook this week. "The outpouring of love from their many friends and beloveds is a comfort now, and we are grateful so many lives were enriched by the love of Deirdre and Grace during their time on Earth. Thank you all for the love you gave them in return. They sincerely loved their lives and treasured friends, and would want us to do the same."

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BY THE REW. CHRISTOPHER NESSE, OF ST. JOHN'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE. Grace be with all them that love our Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity.— Ephesians vi. 24. THESE words may well be treated on without much preface, there being nothing in them which speaks any dependence upon or connexion with anything that went before. Some form of benediction we find used by this great apostle, at the conclusion of every epistle; (Rom. xvi. 24; 1 Cor. xvi. 23, 24; 2 Cor. xiii. 14; Gal. vi. 18;) and accordingly, having driven his excellent design, in this to the church of Ephesus, to a full period or issue, he first makes an affectionate address to God, and to the Mediator, in their behalf: “Peace be to the brethren, and love with faith, from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ;” (verse 23;) and then leaves his apostolical benediction upon them: “Grace be with all them that love our Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity:” (verse 24:) or, “The blessing of the eternal God be upon all the sincere-hearted Christians among you;” for so I look upon the latter words of the verse as a periphrasis of all real Christians; love to Christ being as essential to the Christian, as the rational soul is to the man. The only difficulty in the words, that will require our stay, is to inquire what is meant by εν αφθαρσια, “in sincerity;” some refer it to the χαρις, “grace,” mentioned at the beginning of the verse; as if it had been read, εις αφθαρσια, “unto incorruption,” or “to bring them to eternal life,” or “until they come to a state of immortality: ” so, many the ancients, and of the modern interpreters, Beza, Tremellius, and of others. Others read it in conjunction with the “love of the Lord Jesus Christ;” making it a qualification or a discriminating note of that love, which is sound, real, and sincere, from that which is but pretended, counterfeit, and easy to be corrupted by every difficulty and temptation. And, accordingly, they translate, some in incorruptione; others, absque; a third sort, amore non vitiato nec culpato; all to the same sense with our English translation, “in sincerity.” There are others who consider this phrase apart by itself; some explaining it by purity of heart and conversation, others as denoting thereby the “duration of love,” tam prosperis quam adversis, or “both in good and bad times.” Piscator makes it a distinct branch of the apostle's prayer; as if he had said, “Grace be with all them,” &c., “and life eternal;” taking no notice of the preposition that is added, and varies the construction. It is the conjecture of a learned divine, that the apostle, in adding this clause, hath some reflection on the Gnostics, who had mingled themselves with the Christians of Ephesus, and were, what ever they pretended, neither pure in their love to Christ, having mixed his doctrine with abominable corruptions, nor yet sincere and lasting therein, being ready, upon every blast of persecution that did arise, to deny him, and apostatize from him. I shall for the present, with Musculus, leave the matter indifferent, not only which of the two first, but of all the other fore-mentioned, opinions is fixed upon, finding no cause, so far as concerns my present purpose, to be peremptory in either; the apostle doubtless meaning none else by “lovers of Christ,” but such whose hearts were sincerely and entirely affected to him, whether he intended to characterize them any further by εν αφθαρσια, or no, which, I presume, might easily be manifested from other parallel places, where this grace is mentioned and understood properly, having no additional qualification made thereto; (1 Cor. xvi. 22; John xiv. 15, 23; xxi. 15 —17; 1 Peter i. 8;) and from the design of the words themselves; for certainly he would not so solemnly have entitled the rotten-hearted hypocrites, that did only pretend love to Christ, unto the benediction of the great and blessed God. And if that stand good, we have enough for our purpose; and more need not be contended for. Let this suffice, then, for their meaning. The subject-matter of them, whether you look to the first clause or the last, is very noble, and might well deserve a large consideration; but I am confined to this single use of them, which is, to make them the foundation of these two cases of conscience: What are the genuine characters of a soul’s sincere love to Christ? And how may that love to him be kindled and inflamed? And there are but two or three things that I desire to suggest, and then we shall immediately begin to treat upon them in their order. 1. Let it be considered, that there is a vast difference between these cases, and such others as do refer only to lower duties. When we inquire after the sincerity of our love to Christ, it is all one as if we were upon the search whether we are Christians, yea or not; and whether, consequently, our portion doth lie in the divine promises or threatenings; and what is our immediate duty, that, all other set aside, we must attend unto. And, again, when we seek for directions to help us unto the love of Christ, our inquiry is not, how we may order this or that inferior action, but how we may attain to saving religion and Christianity; how we may escape the great damning sin of the world, and entitle ourselves to the love of God and Christ, and to all the rare privileges which belong to the communion of saints; in a word, to the grace of God here, and to eternal life hereafter. (See 1 Cor. ii. 9; James i. 12; ii. 5; John xiv. 21, 23.) 2. Let it be considered, that it is not the distinct resolution of these cases that will be of final advantage to any person, unless there be added to the former an impartial soul-searching examination of themselves; and to the latter, as the case shall require, a conscientious practice; the resolutions given to cases of conscience about the right performance of duties being nothing else but the bare providing the food or physic; and again the discoveries of men's states thereby, being but the presenting looking-glasses to them; neither of which are effectual, or do any good but to such as faithfully use them. 3. Let me humbly mind you, that the more uncertainty you are at, touching your estates, when you have examined them by the CHARACTERS, the more diligence you are concerned to use in the practice of the DIRECTIONS. And let me add this, that where you cannot undeniably and demonstratively conclude the sincerity of your love, which I think few in comparison on this side of heaven can, there you must never lay by the advice about the last case; no, not although your probabilities should be great: it being at the worst but an easy and sweet trouble to be still doing this great work over again, whereas it is irrecoverably dangerous and desperate, upon presumption that we have done it already, to leave it wholly neglected: and I beseech you, remember this useful rule, that in all trials, which Christians make about grace, it is safer to want credulity than to be over-hasty therein. The cases are two, and very fit to follow each other in the order that is given to them. I begin with the first. CASE I. What are the genuine characters of a soul's sincere love to Christ? And in order to the resolution thereof, I must premise these several PROP. I. That there is a great deal of difference between love, as it is seated in the will or rational appetite, and the same act or principle of love as seated in the sensitive.—In the former, it is a settled, rational, uniform, and deliberate motion, co-incident with the very natural act of the will itself; to love, as the great schoolman notes, being nothing else but intensive velle, “to will intensely,” either person or thing. The motion of the will towards the object, as good and desirable, and the earnest embracing thereof—this is rational love. And according to the various aspect which it hath thereto, either as present or absent, perfect or imperfect, it is called love of desire, or fruition, dependence, or compla cency: and if the object be such as can or doth reciprocate affection, then it is friendship, or amor amicitize [“the love inherent in friend ship.”] But now take love, as it is an affection properly so called, and seated in the lower faculties of the soul; and so there is a great variety and inequality in its motions, much easier to be felt than expressed. Sometimes the soul is in a kind of ecstasy, rapt above itself; and then by and by it is flat and dull again. I note this first, for this reason, —that you may understand what kind of love it is that our inquiry doth proceed upon, namely, rational love; it being, as a judicious divine hath often observed, “not so safe for Christians to try their states by the passionate motions of grace in the lower parts of the soul, or the affec tions, as by the more equal and uniform actings thereof in the will itself,” the το ηγεμονικον, “commandress” of the soul. PROP. II. The acts of the will, in specie morali, derive their goodness or viciousness partly from the nature of the object upon which they are fired.—I do not assert this to be the only ground, whence they are concluded good or evil; for the principle, and the end, and sometimes the degree, of the act are all necessary thereto; but only that this is one thing necessary. Thus the willing of God, or any of those things which are in a direct order to his glory, is that [which] we call “the grace of love;” as, on the other side, when the will moveth towards any thing which standeth in opposition thereto, this is that [which] we call “sinful concupiscence.” PROP. III. It is not barely the object, in itself considered, but as clothed with its proper excellences that agree to it and all its necessary relations, which the will in its motions must have respect unto, before any of those motions can truly be said to be gracious.—For the nature of grace lies not in the act or motion of the will, simply and nakedly considered, but as it is suited and proportioned to the excellences of the object, and those relations which do inseparably belong thereto. For instance: to delight in God; it is not every act of delight which the soul may have upon the apprehension of him, such as a bare philosophical conception of God may sometimes raise the heart unto; but when the believing soul, having taken a view of the excellences of God, and its own sweet relation to him as a gracious Father, is carried forth in a holy rapture and exultancy of spirit. This is the grace of delight. PROP. IV. Though the love of God, and the love of Christ, are never found one without the other, yet is there a distinction necessary to be put between them; and that even as great, in proportion, as is between God and the Mediator, or between the last end and the principal means conducing thereto.—The love of the soul to God is amor finis ultimi, [“the love of the ultimate end,”] or of such a being as it will be an etermal happiness to be united unto. The love of the soul to Christ as Mediator, is amor medii principalis, [“the love of the principal means,”] or of one by whom we may have access to God, and find our happiness in him. The formal reason of the former is the divine all-sufficiency and blessedness; but [that] of the latter, the personal excellences that are in Christ, together with his ability and willingness to free us from our undoing straits and exigencies, as we are in a state of apostasy and elongation from God. And, if I mistake mot, the not observing this necessary distinction between the acts of the soul, as respecting God, and the same acts, in specie, or “in kind,” as respecting the Mediator, hath occasioned much confusion in those answers which are given to this, and many such like inquiries; such arguments as are only proper to the one, being made use of to discover the sincerity of our hearts in the other. PROP. V. Love, as it is an act or habit of the will, and hath Christ for its object, is not properly the evangelical grace of love to Christ, unless it have respect to him, according to the various excellences of his person, and the several distinct relations which are by God invested in him. Or thus: The Gospel grace of love is not the intensive willing a naked Christ, but Christ as represented with his peculiar personal excellences, and with his various offices and relations unto us in the Gospel.— This proposition undeniably follows from the third before laid down. But yet, because it gives some special light to help us to discover the true nature of this grace, and is intended as the foundation of some of those characters that will afterwards come to be insisted on, I must crave your patience, while I offer something farther for the confirmation there of. That certainly is no true moral act which is not suited to the nature of the object: thus, for a man to love his friend no otherwise than he loves his beast, would not be a true moral act of love. And again: as plain a truth it is, that where the act of love doth not bear some gradual proportion to the various excellences of the object that it is conversant about, neither can that act have any moral truth or goodness in it. For instance: to love God or Christ with no higher love than we love inferior persons, whether friends, relations, or superiors in the world, —this were not sincerely to love either of them. (See 1 John ii. 15; Matt. x. 37; Luke xiv. 26.) I add, in the last place, (which is no less evident than either of the former,) that where there are relations or offices necessarily invested in and inseparable from the person beloved, then, if our love doth not respect the object as under those relations and offices, it will be far from being love in sincerity. Some instances will clear this also beyond contradiction: Suppose a woman that hath a husband, and she loves him no otherwise than one friend loves another; and the case is the same between a scholar and his master, a servant and his lord, a subject and his prince; if the affections be without reverence, obedience, and loyalty, will either of these be reputed true love? Why, no more are such to be accounted the sincere lovers of Christ who do not bear an affection to him, in all his offices and relations. And this I take to be so demonstrative a truth, and of such necessary consideration in our present inquiry, that nothing could be spoken in judgment thereto, until we had first made our way unto it, and laid it down: I am sure it will be found fundamental to the right understanding the nature of sincere love to Christ, and the greatest part of the characters which are laid down in the scripture of this grace. It might now be here expected, and it is almost necessary, to give some account of Christ's personal excellences, and also of his offices, what they were; and briefly to intimate what new qualifications each of them would put upon a Christian's intensive willing of Christ, which is but the substratum or matter of this grace. But I am not now to discourse the nature of this grace at large; and so much thereof as is necessary will come in, when we lay down some of the characters of it: and I have but two things more, and then we come to them. PROP. VI. The love of the soul to Christ in sincerity is not any one indivisible act or habit, but a holy frame of spirit, made up of many gracious inclinations, carrying the whole soul along with it unto Christ, jor union and communion with him.—I told you in the beginning, that it is used here by the apostle as the periphrasis of a Christian, a brother, a real saint; and therefore it is not a sudden and transient flash of the soul, or any one act, but comprehensive of much of that wherein the nature of Christianity doth essentially lie. This follows necessarily from the last proposition; and, indeed, to make faith or love to Christ such single physical acts as many do, as it renders the doctrine of Chris tianity perplexed, so doth it exceedingly tend to the amusing of the consciences of weak Christians, and, I am afraid, engender also to licentiousness; it being too usual with such persons, who presumptuously conceive themselves to be Christians, because they discern, as they think, those supposed particular acts, to take up with them, and to grow remiss and careless in other duties, as essential to Christianity and necessary to salvation as those graces themselves. To conclude this proposition: you may note, that as love to God is the soul of natural piety, and is incorporated into every branch of it, so is love to Christ the very spirit that diffuseth itself through and animates all those duties which are required by the new covenant, and respect Jesus Christ as Mediator. PROP. VII. When we inquire after this love, by its genuine characters, you are not to understand thereby only such special properties as argue the essence of this grace a posteriori; but you are to know that we under stand it in such a latitude, as leaving room for all those arguments by which the conscience of a Christian may be resolved, whether this grace was ever truly wrought in his soul or not. And, these things premised, the characters which evidently discover whether we love Christ in sincerity are these that follow. CHAR. I. We may know it by our former convictions.—And the rule is this: Where love to Christ is sincere, there hath been a conviction of the soul's undone condition without him, and of the sufficiency and willing ness of Christ to recover the soul out of that condition. (Isai. lv. 1; lxi. 1–3; Matt. xi. 28.) And wherever this conviction hath been fully wrought, and the wound made thereby regularly healed, there dwells sincere love to him. I put this first, as containing the original birth of evangelical love. I dare affirm, “No conviction, no love; no contrition of heart for sin, no affection in the soul for Christ.” “Every degree of true spiritual love,” saith a divine, that had well studied this point, “proceeds from a proportionable act of saving faith.” (1 Peter i. 8.) And to the same purpose, saith Dr. Preston, and he presseth it ear nestly,–two things must concur to beget love. 1. The sight of Christ's willingness and readiness to relieve. 2. His ability and sufficiency to help. These two, willingness and ability, are the crown upon the head of Christ, when undone souls do first take delight in him ; they are the sweet ointments of our Lord which, by their savour, do attract virgin , souls to betroth themselves unto him. (Canticles iii. 11; i. 3.) What ever men may vainly talk, it is brokenness of heart, and a sense of approaching ruin, that gives the soul the first occasion of acquainting itself in good earnest with Christ; (Acts ii. 36, 37; ix. 5, 6; Matt. ix. 12;) and when faith hath thereupon found the suitableness of Christ to itself, in its present state of misery, then the fire of love begins to burn. So that it is not a blind, casual passion, but a matter of right reason, mature judgment, and choice. It is not a frame of spirit that persons were delivered into they know not how; but such, whereof they that have it can give undeniable reasons; so that, if the question were put to any love-sick soul, as to the spouse in the Canticles, “What is thy beloved more than another beloved? she could give an account, if not so glossy and rhetorical, yet as logical and rational as that which is there given. (Canticles v. 9, 10; i. 3, 12; ii. 3.) She hath seen that in Christ, —so much excellency in his person, and so much readiness and sufficiency, as resulting from his several offices,—which hath even ravished her, and made “him comely to her for delights,” yea, “the very chiefest of ten thousands : ” (Canticles v. 10:) and therefore she both can and doth clasp fast about him, and takes him for her Physician, Husband, King, Priest, and Prophet. “Since he is willing and fit to be my Saviour, O,” saith the soul, “I will be his disciple, servant, subject, or any thing.” Thus she can hold no longer, but falls down-right sick of love. (Canticles ii. 5; v. 4.) And this is the first character. Take it now, and ask thy soul, “Didst thou ever yet find thyself lost and undone? not able to bear up against the terrors of an accusing and condemning conscience; even dying away for fear lest God should spend all his arrows upon thee, and leave thee a horror to thyself, and an amazement to all about thee? (Deut. xxxii. 23; Job vi. 4; Psalm xxxviii. 2.) And was it in this dark valley that thou camest first seriously acquainted with Christ? and didst thou see his bowels yearning to thee, (Jer. xxxi. 20,) and that he was fully able to set thee in the light of the countenance of that God whose terror was upon thee? (Acts ir. 5.) And under this conviction was it that thou didst first close with him?” Why, this is love, not in pretense and compliment, but in sincerity: whereas, on the other side, if thy pretended affection wants this foundation; if it hath been always alike, neither more nor less; if that senseless conceit runs through thy soul, that thou hast loved Christ ever since thou wast born, and never didst feel the least stirrings of enmity against him; if education, custom, outward communion,” be all that thou hast to say to prove thy love; in faithfulness to thy soul, I warn thee to take heed of self-deceit, for surely “the root of the matter is not in thee;” (Job xix. 28;) and if thou wilt still presume, notwithstanding this confident denial, I have but one word more, and that is, to commend to thy serious perusal that judicious tract of Mr. Pinke, on this very case and text; where these counterfeit grounds of love are fully convicted of insufficiency, and there fore I would not do it here again. CHAR. II. Where love to Christ dwells in sincerity, there hath been some sensible impression, taste, and feeling of the Father's love to the soul in him.—I do not mean, the Father's love, as it lies in the womb of election, (Rom. viii. 30; ix. 13,) but as it hath broken forth in a powerful, actual vocation. The pedigree of a Christian's love to his Saviour is to be fetched from the Father's love to souls in Christ. (John xiv. 6.) “We love him, because he first loved us.” (1 John iv. 19.) Christ himself, as Mediator, is but a means whereby souls may come to God, their final end and blessedness; (John xiv. 9; xv. 23;) and therefore, as the soul that loves him loves the blessed God much more, so, before we can fix upon him with full satisfaction, some beams thereof must light upon us; it being too great a difficulty for the soul to prevail with itself to trust all its concernments in the hands of a crucified Christ, and to be fond I of him, until it hath gained some sweet assurance of the Father's love to itself in him. And hence it is that our Saviour tells us: “No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him.” (John vi. 44.) By “coming to Christ,” I take it for granted, may be understood either faith or love; and these cannot be without the Father's drawing. What is that Morally, it lies in the clear discoveries of his willingness to be reconciled to us in Christ; when, in conformity to his being “in Christ, reconciling the world to himself,” (2 Cor. v. 19,) he is pleased to vouchsafe us his own beseechings of us to be reconciled, then he draws us. The promise, therefore, of reconciliation must first be made known; and by the sweet influence thereof the soul is allured with cheerfulness to throw itself into the arms of its Saviour: and this is love. Try by this also: Didst thou ever find those cords of a man, those bonds of divine and ravishing love, thrown upon thee! Didst thou ever see God to be thy happiness, and offering himself to thee as such, and so alluring thee? Then thou art married to Christ; for this speaks thee united to God in love; and the end must include the means, and the greater the lesser. CHAR. III. We then love Christ in sincerity, when that affection in us is qualified according to the various excellences that belong to the person of our Lord.—When it respects him according to the manifesta tion made of him in the gospel; namely, not simply as a person, who is historically made known to us by such a name; but according to the true character of him, as God and man in one person, Θεανθρωπος as one filled with the Spirit of God, above measure, (John iii. 34,) by an ineffable unction; as one admirably condescending, and laying aside his Divine splendour and majesty, that he might appear “in the form of a servant, and be obedient unto death, even the death of the cross,” for the salvation of sinners; (Phil. ii. 6—8;) and, lastly, as one raised from the dead by God, (Acts v. 30,) made able, and declaring his high satisfaction in the access of sinners unto God by him: and so there are these four graces, which are always attendant upon and are, as it were, incorporated into the nature of this evangelical affection: 1. Humble and reverent admiration.—It is an admiring love. Objects that are incomparably excellent do always first affect with admiration; and though that affection dissolve into love, yet doth it not usually wholly cease, especially if the object be not thoroughly comprehended. It is thus with thy soul, Christian, that art a sincere lover of thy Redeemer, and hast not set up some image of an ordinary person, in the place of him: thou admirest him, whom thou lovest, as never being able to comprehend his glory: (Canticles v. 16; Eph. iii. 17:) the Lord whom thou lovest being God as well as man, and man as well as God, and all this in one person: (John i. 1, 14; 1 Tim. iii. 16:) an object in whom heaven and earth are so admirably blended together, that the acutest reason loseth itself, and stands amazed at the union : whence we find one of the ancients thus speaking of it: “I know that the Word was made flesh; but how or in what manner this was done, I know not. Dost thou wonder that I profess my ignorance? Why, the whole creation is ignorant of it as well as I.” And another of them gives this advice: “If reason go about to cavil, ωροφερε (ετοιμην λυσιν) την ωιστιν, do not dispute, but apply thyself to the common refuge against cavils in matters of faith, even faith itself: God hath said it, and therefore I must and will believe it.” These things considered, I dare boldly tell thee, that thou canst not love in sincerity, but together therewith thou wilt be under a holy rapture of admiration; and, together with thy love, thy admiration will be always increasing. 2. Sweet and refreshing delight.—It is a delighting, rejoicing love. (Canticles ii. 3.) “Love,” saith Aquinas, est complacentia amantis in amato, “is the rest and satisfaction of the soul in the object loved.” The nature of love lies much in delight. Thou canst not, Christian, love thy Lord, but thou wilt find thy heart even ravished with delight in him; as being one in whom “the fulness of the Godhead dwells,” σωματικως, or “personally,” (Col. ii. 9,) non per efficaciam solilm aut assistentiam, sed per unionem hypostaticam; or not virtually, or only in a way of external help and assistance; and being also one that had such an unction of the Spirit upon him, that hath fully fitted him for the delight of thy soul. (Canticles iv. 15.) And hence it is, that we find the spouse in the book of Canticles so often letting forth her heart in holy delight to her Beloved, as is manifested by her many loving compellations, and several other expressions, (“He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts,” Canticles i. 13,) too large and many to be mentioned here; and therefore I refer you to the book itself. 3. Ingenuous gratitude and thankfulness.—It is a grateful and thankful love, as that which is begotten in the soul by the sense of Christ's unspeakable goodness and condescension, and which is also ever after fed and maintained thereby. Now the condescension of Christ lies in three things: (1.) In his voluntary undertaking the work of reconciliation and mediation with God for persons so unworthy. (Rom. v. 8.) “He took not on him the nature of angels; but he took on him the seed of Abraham.” (Heb. ii. 16.) It was the cause of sinners which this great Lord undertook to plead. (2.) In his unwearied diligence, and invincible patience, in fulfilling the severe law of redemption, which he had submitted to. Though the injury that was done him by man was so great and manifest, and the terror of the Lord against him also so severe and unspeakable, “yet he opened not his mouth : he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he opened not his mouth.” (Isai. liii. 7.) (3.) In being willing to communicate the benefits purchased thereby to sinful and rebellious men, upon such easy terms; bidding us do nothing else but turn to God by repent ance and self-denial, and believe in himself; and then, whatever our sins had been, all the advantages merited by his death should be made over to us. (Matt. xi. 30; Rom. x. 8–10; Isai. i. 16—18.) Now, when all these are considered, (as by every soul that sincerely loves him more or less they are,) do they not sweetly affect with thankfulness, as well as love? Christian, canst thou look upon such a Redeemer without some sense of an obligation laid upon thy soul thereby ? Wilt thou think one single and separate affection enough for him? Or rather, will not thy heart empty itself into the bosom of the Lord, with love and thankfulness both at once, and each of them contending which shall outdo the other? 4. Supporting hope and confidence.—It is a hoping and confiding love; it is not a languishing affection, but that which brings life into the soul from the fulness of that Christ it feeds upon. “Perfect love,” saith the apostle, “casteth out fear.” (1 John iv. 18.) There will not be so much as the shadow of fear upon the soul, when this affection is ripened into perfect fruition. And, in the mean time, as the degrees of it do increase, so is the soul heightened in its hopes, and tramples upon its former jealousies, fears, and discouragements. And to this sense some interpret those words: “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?” &c.: (Rom. viii. 35–39 ) as if they were the exultation of faith upon the view of love's conquest, and victorious triumph over all its enemies. Love gives confidence of access to Christ, and unto God by him; and this confidence lies in the soul, as a cordial against all its faintings and despondencies: not that there may not be a sinking of spirits, and a swooning away for a time; but love will restore the soul again, and knowing Christ to be good, as well as all-sufficient for its condition, it will recover life and spirits again, and not suffer it utterly to faint under its own sad apprehensions. (Canticles vi. 12, 13.) And this is the third character. Take now all these four qualifications of sincere love, and try yourselves by them. CHAR. IV. If our love be sincere, it is an affection which respecteth not a naked Christ, but Christ as Mediator; or, it is a hearty desire of, and complacency in, Christ, in all his offices, as King, and Priest, and Prophet.—And of such moment is the right knowledge of this character, that, Christian, I must desire thee principally to study it, and pass a judgment upon thyself thereby. For, whatever fondness and sudden flashings of love thou mayest find within thee, they will not so clearly tell thee what thou art, as the knowledge of thyself by this mark. Take it for a clear truth, that if thou lovest not Christ as thy Sovereign Lord; if thy heart be not knit to him as thy High Priest with God; if thou hast not affectionately entertained him as thy Master and Teacher; in a word, if thou art not consecrated unto God by Christ, if thou art not a loyal subject, and a willing disciple; love in sincerity doth not dwell in thee; thou art still an enemy, and wilt so be judged. It is not fondness of expression, nor any outward compliment that men put upon Christ, which reacheth the New-Testament motion of love to Christ; but when as loyal subjects and willing disciples we are always doing the things that are grateful, and are obedient to him: this is love. And hence it is, that in so many places our Lord puts us upon trying our love by our obedience, by keeping his words and commandments; and speaks of libertimes, infidels, the carmally-wise, rebels, and apostates, as enemies and haters of him, whatever their pretences are to the contrary. (John xiv. 15, 21 ; xv. 8, 10, 21, 23, 24; 1 John v. 3; Luke xix. 27; Heb. x. 28; John xiv. 23, 24.) And, verily, so essential is this to sincere love, that, unless you understand it, you will be able to give but a lame account of most of the scripture-characters thereof, (as, if I had time, I could easily demonstrate,) because they do all pre-suppose it. If thou wouldest know, therefore, whether this grace be in thee in truth, take thy heart, Christian, to Christ in every office, and try it, by such interrogatories as may result from the consideration of them; and this will tell thee thy case distinctly. Begin first with Christ as High Priest; for this did lay the foundation of the other two offices; and if thou hast any love to Christ in sincerity, it was the sight of him in this that first kindled it. And thus bespeak thyself: “Didst thou ever, O my soul, seriously consider what Christ hath undertaken in thy behalf with the jealous God, whose face thou couldst not see, and live? Wast thou ever convinced, that all thy prayers, duties, outward privileges, and devotions were little worth, and could not have aught availed thee, unless by his own blood he had first entered within the vail, and made atonement for thee; (Heb. x. 10, 12; 1 Cor. ii. 2;) and then with the same blood went afterwards to the right hand of God, and put him in mind of his covenant, to procure actual grace, and peace, and adoption for thee! And is it a pleasure to thee, as well as thy admiration, to be always musing and searching what such an abyss of grace and goodness should mean? And in the midst of thy musings was it that thy affections first took this holy fire, and were even surprised into love? Is it by his mediation that thou findest thy expectations from God, and thy delight in him, supported? (Rom. viii. 34; Phil. iii. 7, 8.) And dost thou rejoice in him, as one whose goodness thou adorest, and whose favour with God, purchased by his own merit, thou admirest; and therefore art most willing to trust all thy concernments in his hands; and in all thy addresses to God comest leaning upon the arms of him, as thy beloved Mediator and Intercessor? (Canticles viii. 5.) Why, thus to renounce our own righteousness, and to feel our hearts warmed into a further estimation of his; to attribute all our acceptance with God to him; briefly, to be intensively willing of Christ, and to look upon him with full satisfaction of spirit in all his priestly administrations;–this is sincerely to love Christ as our High Priest. And, on the contrary, to undervalue his blood either as needless by presumption, or as worthless by desperation ; to be ascribing to ourselves, when we receive any kindness or favour from God; to doat upon our own worth and righteousness, as that which is sufficient without either Christ's righteousness, satisfaction, or intercession;–this is interpretatively to reject him from being our High Priest, and to hate the person of our Lord. (Heb. x. 28.) Thus try yourselves, whether ye love Christ in his priestly office; and when you have done with that, take thy soul to his prophetical office; and make a further trial, by bespeaking thyself after the same manner. Thus: “Didst thou ever, O my soul, seriously consider that thou wast made for an eternal life, and that none could ever chalk thee out the way thereto, it being only to be learned in the school of this great Prophet? And thereupon hast thou wholly ceased from listening unto any other? and, as a loving disciple, hast thou found pleasure in seeking the law, even the word of thy salvation, at his mouth? Doth thy heart thoroughly savour his doctrine! And dost thou like the discipline of his school? Dost thou make it thy study to know, and lay it as a charge upon thyself to keep, the words of this great Master and Prophet? (John xiv. 23, 24.) And even now, that he is gone to heaven, and hath left his word in the scripture behind him, and hath sent his Spirit, and set up under-officers in his school, and precious ordinances for thy guidance and direction; dost thou value the scriptures above all other writings in the world, and witness thy esteem of them by thy daily perusal and study of them? Dost thou bear a reverence in thy breast to all Christ's offices and institutions! Dost thou account the mouth of Christ most sweet, and even delight to hear his voice in the scripture, and in every ordinance? And when thou hast heard, dost thou lay up what thou hast been taught as the faithful counsel of thy dearest Teacher, and rejoice therein? (Canticles v. 16; Psalm i. 2; Heb. ii. I.) More particularly, what is thy carriage towards his Spirit? Dost thou hear when he calls? And art thou tractable to all his motions! Dost thou grieve him, or art thou willing to be instructed and guided by him? Why, thus to cease from leaning to our own understandings; to give up ourselves to Christ, and his Spirit in the scriptures, and in all the ordinances of the gospel; to be the serious and willing disciples of Christ;-this is to love Christ as our Prophet in sincerity. That is the second office. Once more, to make the trial by this mark complete: and that will respect his kingly office: and this is as easy as either of the former; for, our loyalty and voluntary subjection to Christ as commanding and governing, this is love; and the heart's rebellion against Christ, rejecting his dominion, murmuring against his laws, finding fault with his administrations, disturbing his subjects, and disquieting the peace of his kingdom, envying him the multitude of his subjects, and yielding no obedience to his commands;–all these are several branches of enmity against Christ as King and Sovereign. Put the case, therefore, home to thy own soul, if thou wouldest not be mistaken, and say: “Doth Christ rule within thee, O my soul, or doth self and Satan? Art thou glad with his sovereignty, or is it the yoke thou canst not bear? Do the laws of his kingdom bear sway within thee, or is it the law of thy members and carnal self? (Rom. vi.) When both come in competition, whose command dost thou in the course of thy life most commonly fulfil? Whose kingdom art thou most delighted in the advancement of? Is it a pleasure to thee, that thy Lord doth reign, and that his throne is more universally exalted? Or else, doth thy heart rise against the advancement of Christ's kingdom In whom dost thou find thy greatest delight? Is it rather in the company of rebels, that would pull the crown from the head of Christ, than in the humble and obedient subjects of thy Lord? Dost thou take Christ to be thy Prince and Sovereign? And dost thou love the peace and glory of his kingdom, as becomes an obedient subject of so great a Lord?” Why, this is intensively to will Christum Regem, or to love him as King. And this is the third office, and the fourth character. If you would make sure work, this is a rule which will not deceive you. CHAR. V. If we have a fellowship with Christ in his honours and dis honours, or in his joys and sorrows, then is our love not feigned unto Christ, but in sincerity.—True love, if I may be allowed so to speak, mixeth concernments: my meaning is, that it makes another's joys and sorrows to be mine, as well as his: they may write “hatred” upon themselves, who are regardless whether it go well or ill with Christ's interests in the world. No communion with Christ, no love. Even the personal reproaches and abuses which Christ endured here below, though so many hundred years since, do yet affect them; and they that love him have a sympathy with him in them. Neither is it his joy alone that he was personally advanced by being raised again from the dead, and taken up to glory, to sit therein at the right hand of God, but theirs also. (Luke xxiv. 52; Acts ii. 26.) Tell a loyal wife, that her husband is honoured, and her heart will leap at the tidings that are brought to her. It is good news to love-sick souls to hear that Christ is now in glory; they savour the advancements of their Lord, according to those words of Christ himself to his apostles: “If ye loved me, ye would rejoice, because I said, I go unto the Father: for my Father is greater than I.” (John xiv. 28.) They are glad by faith to see the Sun of Righteousness after a dark and cloudy morning in his meridian altitude. (John xx. 20.) They die, and are crucified with Christ in his death; (Rom. vi. 3; Gal. ii. 19:) and they feel a reviving of themselves in the resur rection of their Lord ; and hence it is said of them, that they are “quickened together with him,” and that they “sit together in heavenly places with him.” (Eph. ii. 5; i. 20.) We read of Mary, that she went weeping to the grave of her Lord; but hearing that he was arisen, she came away rejoicing: (John xx. 11; Matt. xxviii. 8:) and no otherwise was it with his disciples. Christ doth not triumph alone in his ascension; but all such as love him share therein together with him. And as they share with Christ in his personal joys and troubles; so do they no less when any of his concernments in the world do either prosper, or else are trampled upon and clouded. It is as the arrows of death to see either his laws, ordinances, officers, or subjects trampled upon. The reproaches of the rebellious world reproaching their Lord fall upon them, and are as so many darts struck into their own souls. (Psalm xlii. 10; lxix. 9.) This is that which successively feeds their joys and sorrows, that it goes well with the militant church here below, or that a cloud of displeasure and persecution is spread over it. CHAR. VI. Where love to Christ is sincere, there Christ is accounted by the soul to be its treasure; and there is a longing desire in every such soul of the nearest communion with him.—I put both these together, though there be a very clear distinction between them, for brevity. It is a truly conjugal love, which can neither bear with distance, nor brook any rival. And this is the meaning of the spouse in that double expression, calling him “the chiefest among ten thousand,” and professing him to be “altogether lovely.” (Canticles v. 10, 16.) The soul that loves Christ may love other things, and esteem them lovely; but she will say of none, that they are “altogether lovely,” but only of her Lord. When one asked Alexander to show him his treasure, the report is, that he pointed to his friend Hephæstion: the treasure of a soul that sincerely loves Christ, is Christ himself: Deus meus est omnia, or “My God is my all,” saith the soul that loves God as his ultimate end. Hence is that of David: “Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.” (Psalmlyxiii. 25.) Christus meus est omnia, or, “My Christ is my all,” saith the soul that is upon inquiry how to find accepta tion with God. Whence is that of Paul: “Doubtless I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord.” (Phil. iii. 8.) It is the proper motto of a love-sick soul, “None but Christ:” the sincerity of a Christian's love lies in giving a pre-eminence to the Redeemer, whom it loves above every thing else. The soul that loves Christ, values nothing in comparison of him, no, not his own benefits. Meretricius amor est, plus annulum quam sponsum amare, or, “It is a note of a harlot, to prefer the portion before the person.” And that is a no less true than noble speech of the devout A Kempis: Nobilis amator non quiescit in dono, sed in Christo super omne donum, or “The worthy and noble lover values not Christ so much by what he brings, as by what he is himself.” The soul that loves Christ, loves ordinances, because they are the “banqueting-house” of her Lord, wherein she is often refreshed by him; (Canticles ii. 4;) she loves the privileges of the gospel, because they are the purchase of her Lord's blood. (Canticles iv. l, &c.) She loves her own graces, because they are the rare ornaments which Christ hath put upon her, to render her beautiful, and fit her for his own embraces; and yet, after all, her language to Christ is, “Not thine, but thee: ” she will not so value them, as to forget Him that gives them; Christ is her centre, and therefore she rests not, but will lay by, and through all to come to him; she can scarce forbear a fit of impatience sometimes to think of that distance that is still between them. “Make haste, my beloved,” saith the spouse to Christ, “and be thou like to a roe or to a young hart upon the mountains of spices.” (Canticles viii. 14.) And such another ejaculation is that, where the whole church is brought-in crying to Christ: “Come, Lord Jesus, come quickly.” (Rev. xxii. 17, 20.) While our hearts dwell below upon the thick clay, and have no daily desires to send forth, as doves from the ark, for communion with Christ, there is little sign of sincere love to him. CHAR. VII. We may know our sincerity in love, by the value we put upon ourselves, as well as upon Christ.—If our interest in Christ be the rule by which we value ourselves, that will argue true love: when this makes it day in our souls, that Christ smiles upon us; and, on the other side, when this spreads the darkness of the might over us, that he hides his face from us; then we love him. David loved God heartily; and, therefore, when God smiled, he rejoiced; and when God hid his face, he was as much troubled then as before delighted. (Psalm iv. 6; xxx. 7.) It is thus in every relation, where there is sincerity of affection as the bond thereof, and a dependence between them of the one upon the other. It is thus between a prince and a loyal favourite; between a husband and a loving wife. It is thus between the love-sick soul and Christ; when she enjoys him, then none so lightsome in countenance as she. According to the nature of love, her affections are hardly concealed; they are even too big for her heart to cover, and therefore she can scarce with hold herself from a holy exultation before every one that meets her. Whereas, on the other side, if Christ but withdraws; if she calls, and he gives no answer; if he seems to avoid her company, and to despise her familiarity; what then? O then her joy is turned into gall, and her Pleasantness into wormwood; then her countenance grows dark and sable, and her thoughts within her are full of horror, dejection, and confusion; she goes up and down like a person almost distracted, and every Place is made to echo to her griefs and mournings; she goes from ordinance to ordinance, and from one watchman to another, and proclaims to them all the sickness of her soul, if peradventure she may recover again sight of her Beloved. All this and much more with incomparable elegance you may read described in the Song of Solomon. Thus, as the marigold opens to the sun in the firmament, so doth the heart of a sincere Christian to the Sun of Righteousness, Christ in glory. CHAR. V.III. Where love is sincere, the soul will be often on the wing of meditation, and busied in the contemplation of Christ.—It is an old rule and a true one, Anima est ubi amat, non ubi animat, or, “The soul dwells as much where it hath fixed its love, may, more there, than where it hath its most natural operation.” Christ, and the believer that loves him, live as if they had but one soul betwixt them. It is not the dis tance between earth and heaven that can separate them; true love will find out Christ wherever he is ; when he was upon the earth, they that loved him kept his company; and now that he is gone to heaven, and out of sight, those that love him are frequently sending up their hearts unto him. And, indeed, they never think themselves intelligent in any thing that is worth the knowing, until they have made their souls much acquainted and familiar with their crucified Saviour. (I Cor. ii. 2.) CHAR. IX. There will be a willingness to part with all for him.— How many goodly things do persons of all sorts contemn for some one thing which they love! Ammon, Ahab, and Haman, are three great examples of this. (2 Sam. xiii. 2; 1 Kings xxi. 4; Esther v. 13.) Take but one instance, and it shall be of a covetous man: why, he disregards all the learned accomplishments in the world for a little gain; he thinks himself better, when he hath got that which comes out of the bowels of the earth he treads on, than that which comes from the mansion-house of God, in the heaven above him; and, therefore, how familiarly and easily will he part with the one to choose the other No bonds of nature or religion are enough to restrain him. (Acts xx. 24.) It is the resolution of a soul that loves Christ, that nothing shall part them. They are habitually martyrs already; and if he put them to it, it is not life itself that they will account too precious to lay down for the sake of him. (Matt. x. 37; Rev. xii. 11.) All the waters and floods of persecution, temptation, and affliction shall not quench their flames of love. (Canticles viii. 7.) Witness those words of Ignatius: Πυρ και σταυρος, &c.; or, “Let fire, cross,” &c., “and all the torments, which by men or beasts can be inflicted on my body, yea, and add to them what all the devils in hell can do upon it, if it were by solemn sentence of excommunication delivered to them; yet would I go through them all, to come to the bosom of my Lord.” CHAR. X. There will be a willingness to stoop to the meanest offices, for the service of Christ.—“Love,” we use to say, “stands not with majesty;” it did not do so in the person of our Saviour, when he washed and wiped his disciples' feet; (John xiii. 5, 6, 14;) and those that love him will not think it much to conform to his example; they will not think they can ever stoop too low for the sake of him. (John xxi. 15.) CHAR. XI. If it sticks not barely in the person of Christ, but reacheth to all that have an union with him.—If it be to Christ mystical as well as personal; if you love their persons, their graces, their fellowship, &c. “Tell me,” saith the spouse, “where thou makest thy flocks to rest at noon.” (Canticles i. 7.) She delights to be led forth with them into the green pastures of his ordinances, and to feed together with them. If she hath anything, it is all theirs, who have an equal interest in Christ with herself. (Acts ii. 44, 45.) She will make use of her graces, substance, and all, that fellow-members may be refreshed. It makes them of catholic spirits. The apostle is peremptory, and brandeth them all as liars that pretend to the one of these without the other. See 1 John iv. 19, 20; v. 1; John xiii. 34, 35. CHAR. XII. We may know it by its concomitants.-Sincere love goes not but in the company of every other grace: it either presupposeth, or strongly implieth and inferreth, the whole duty of a Christian. Diligere Christum, saith Aquinas, est Christo in omnibus se subjicere, et regulam praeceptorum ejus in omnibus sequi; or, “To love Christ, is to fulfil the whole law of Christ.” (John xiv. 15.) It is a most comprehensive grace; it is the abstract of the new creature, the whole image of God. In one word: it is the substance of the divine workmanship upon the soul. They are but ciphers, and signify nothing in Christianity, who are without it. Briefly: to love Christ, it is in some measure to partake of every grace, and to be a Christian altogether. These are the characters: some I have omitted, and in others I have been brief, because I would reserve a little room for the second case. Give me leave but briefly to suggest a few things for satisfaction of one doubt, and I shall presently come to that, Will some say, “If this be love in sincerity, who then loves him aright?” It is no less dangerous to draw out the description of a grace so as none can find it, than to leave it so as none may suspect the want or absence thereof in them selves; and upon that rock, they will tell me, I have split in the decision of this case, there being hardly any one that can go from character to character, and say, after a thorough search, “Now I know that I am a lover of Christ in sincerity:” for answer to which scruple, I shall barely suggest a few considerations. 1. It is most certain and notorious, that there is much counterfeit love abroad.—And it was not the least part of my design to unmask it. Characters serve as well to convince the presumptuous, as to establish the sincere and upright. There is much in the world that looks like love, that is not: such are those vagous affections that are to a Christ in general, and not to Him as King, Priest, and Prophet; and those counterfeit affections, which are to Christ upon the sole arguments of education, custom, which are as truly in a Turk to his Mahomet, and serve as well to justify the Jew in his blasphemy against Christ, as the Christian in his pretended love of him: (for love to Christ, say divines, is not so much to be measured by the degree and fervour, as by the grounds and motives:) and also that barren love which works up the soul to no measure of obedience unto him; and, lastly, that which allows Christ but the world's leavings in our hearts, every thing being constantly preferred before him; and what a vast number of persons go no further than these! 2. Many persons are truly gracious, who yet know not whether they have any grace or not.—It requires more skill to search out the nature of a grace, and to find it in ourselves, than barely to exercise it; the former are works of much judgment, and require a deep acquaintance with our own hearts; whereas to the latter, it is enough if a person be but of an ordinary understanding, and an honest heart. Besides, graces have their degrees, like the waters of the sanctuary; (Ezek. xlvii. 3–5;) and where grace is very shallow and little, it is exceeding difficult to know that there is any at all; and such persons should do well, who are so weak, rather to spend time in the exercise of grace, than in trying whe ther they have grace or no; for commonly it is but labour in vain. 3. There are no souls in whom this grace is really planted, but they have all these characters drawn upon their hearts to know it by, more or less.--I do not say, they can find them in themselves, and know they have them; but only, that they have them. And of this I need give no further evidence than what you will easily find yourselves, if you will but study the nature of love to Christ, by the rule of it laid down in the fifth proposition premised, and by the third and fourth characters; for I am well assured that Christ cannot be loved as therein described, unless all these particulars mentioned be either antecedent thereto, or connexed with it. And so I come to the second case; namely, How we may get our love to him kindled and inflamed. And I shall proceed in the resolution of this, by these four steps. I. I will discover the danger of being without this grace. II. I will add some moving considerations to provoke all that love their souls, to look after it. III. I will give directions to them that have it not, how to get it. IV. I will add a few more directions for them that have it, how it may be increased and inflamed. I. I begin with the first, which I will dispatch by these two steps: 1. By discovering the heinousness of sin. 2. The terror of the punish ment due thereto. 1. Now, that you may understand the first, besides what hath been said in the fore-mentioned tract, proving it to be a sin against the Father's love and wisdom, the whole work of the Son, and the special economy of the Holy Ghost; I add, (1.) It is a sin utterly subverting the whole design of the Gospel:— Casting a scorn upon the grace of all the three Persons, and not so much as acknowledging what was done by them as worthy the least acceptance, it writes “vanity” upon all the promises, and is a frustration to the design of Christ in that noble dispensation; there being nothing that he did more aim at than to testify his own and his Father's love to us, and to recover from us our love to them again. (John iii. 17; 1 John i. 3.) (2.) It is interpretatively a confederacy with Satan against God and Christ. (Matt. vi. 24; Acts xiii. 10.)—The proper and grand wickedness of the devil being his opposition to the design of God in glorifying himself by the salvation of mankind through Christ, which yet, so far as we are haters of Christ, we are in our measure guilty of, as well as he. (Heb. x. 28.) (3.) It is a complicated sin; many sins in one.—Such as are foul ingratitude, rebellion; it being the casting off the sovereignty of a rightful Lord; cruelty to Christ, and, as it were, a kicking him upon the bowels, a Christicidium; and to ourselves, (Prov. viii. 36,) the tearing out, our own bowels with our own hands, spiritual uncleanness and adultery; (James iv. 4;) it being a treacherous revolting from Christ, after profession of marriage to him. (4). It is a sin which opens the door to all wickedness.-Resistance of the Spirit, contempt of the gospel and them that bring it, slighting of ordinances, treason against Christ as King, and implacable bitterness and enmity against his subjects and children. (John xv. 18, 19.) (5.) It is an irrational sin.—Or such for which there cannot be the least apology; because Christ was lovely in himself; (Canticles i. 13, 14; v. 9, 16;) did much to engage our hearts to him; earnestly entreated us to place our affections upon him; sending his messengers to woo us; bestowing gifts upon us, like a king, to oblige us; (1 Peter i. 4;) and making almost incredible offers of much more that he would do for us; yea, finally, threatening us even with Anathema Maranatha, (1 Cor. xvi. 22,) if we withhold our hearts from him. And can such a sin after all this be extenuated? (6.) It is a sin brought forth and nursed by the foulest abominations. —Such as spiritual darkness, and ignorance; (1 Cor. ii. 8;) notorious infidelity, as to the doctrine of the gospel; (John v. 43,44, 47;) horrible pride, self-righteousness, idolatrous and carnal self-love. (7.) It is a sin against all our covenants and engagements.-Especially our baptismal bond, wherein we did solemnly promise Christ our hearts, and that in opposition to all others; (2 Cor. xi. 2;) the bond of Christian ingenuity, self-love, and proper interest, profession, and relation, as we bear his name in the world. (8.) And, lastly, It is a sin utterly inconsistent with the presence of any one grace in the soul.—It being impossible that any thing should prosper, where this weed hath once settled and rooted itself. You may as well expect to find branches without a root, as the graces of the Spirit without love. Thus very briefly you have an account of the danger of being without love to Christ, from the nature of the sin. 2. I argue it from the terror of the punishment.—And certainly the just God hath proportioned the evil of this, to the quality of that. Study well these few places of scripture: John iii. 19; Matt. xxi. 41; Heb. ii. 3; x. 28, 29 ; xii. 25; Rev. ii. iii. throughout. O the terrors of the Lord, that will one day be heaped upon the haters of his Son! (See Rev. vi. 16.) But we need not look any further for this matter, than into the awakened conscience of a rebel against Christ in a fit of desperation: what scorpion-lashes doth such a man's conscience give him! O the heat of this burning caldron With what rage and fury doth it break forth on every side, until the soul is even become a hell to itself! “And wouldest thou not love Christ,” will enraged conscience then say, “so lovely in himself, and so full of love to thee? Couldst thou see him sighing, bleeding, sweating, dying for thy sake, and yet not love him? Couldst thou spurn at such bowels, and contemn such prodigious mercy? and that when this love would have opened to thee the door of glory! how great, how infinite, glory! and when the rejecting of it would infallibly plunge thy soul into misery; how dreadful, how intolerable! Was ever madness like thine, O my soul?” will conscience say. “Certainly hell is too easy a punishment for such a serpent, such an incarnate devil as thou art. Well may God rejoice to be avenged on such a wretch as thee, and make thee to drink up the very dregs of his indignation; while others that ‘dwell in God’ shall ‘dwell in love,’ O how will God be nothing else but fury, and wrath, and vengeance to thee! Thou shalt one day (and that day such as never shall have an end) hear Justice call upon Omnipotency still to add more flame to thy torment!’” Thus conscience will look backward and forward, and even wreak itself, with the most dismal flaming language that it can find out, upon the haters of Christ. And is not that a dreadful sin, which shall thus set a man against himself, and put a sword into the hand of cruel conscience to cleave the soul in pieces! And is not that a dreadful punishment, when a man shall become his own accuser, judge, and executioner? when conscience shall burn so hot within a man, that he shall be a terror to himself, and an eternal amazement? And yet, alas! what is all this to the immediate impressions of the wrath of God upon the soul? when He that hath said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay,” (Rom xii. 19,) shall grasp the soul in his dreadful hand; which might be farther improved, and be demonstrated to be incomparably the sorest part of the punishment. II. But I come to the second particular, which was, to lay down some moving considerations to provoke such as love themselves to love Christ; and, besides the particulars last mentioned, 1. Consider who it is that I plead for this day.—Sirs, I do not call you to doat upon thick clay, filth, and vanity. I do not plead to gain your hearts to one that is not worthy, or hath not deserved that you should place your affections upon him: if you can make either of these manifest, hate him and spare not. But I plead for one who is, (1.) Glorious and excellent: if you doubt it, read his character, Canticles v. 9. What sayest thou now? Is he not altogether lovely 7 Is there any blemish to be found in him? And if thou mistrustest the judgment of the church, sure thou canst not doubt of God's. Hear his sentence: “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well-pleased.” (Matt. iii. 17.) He knew of whom he spake, for he was his Son; and he doth not say, he was pleased with him only, but well-pleased, that is, delighted, and satisfied. (See Prov. viii. 30.) And was he worthy of God's love; and dost thou doubt whether he have deserved thine! (2.) Consider, he is one that died for thee; first, to purchase thy love; and since is gone to heaven, where yet he doth not cease to call upon thee, and invite thee to bestow thy heart upon him. Were he excellent, but proud, it would be little to thy advantage; but he stoops, and wooes, and entreats thee. It is a day of the gladness of his heart when he prevails but with one soul to close with him; and all the rage of his persecutors did not grieve him more, than you will, if you stand it out against him. (Isai. lv. 1; Luke xv. 20; Acts ix. 4; John v. 21, 26.) (3.) Consider, he is one that hath the power of thy life and death in his own hands; and this is one part of his covenant, upon which thy life or death depends; as offered in the promise, so he waits; but as love is the condition of it, so if thou hearkenest not, thou losest thy share therein; and what thou choosest, be it life or death, thou shalt certainly have. 2. Consider, what it is I plead for.—Why, all that I ask is love; and will you deny Christ that? I call thee to think well of Christ, to desire him, to take complacency in him, to breathe after union and eternal communion with him; and which of these dost thou think too much for such an object? Or where canst thou place them more fitly than upon him What is he worthy of, if not of this? Did ever death content itself with such a recompence? Was ever any debt easier paid, any service so easily performed, as this, only to love? Hath God made Christ a King, Priest, and Prophet? and is that all which thou must do, to partake of his love in him, to love him in those relations! and wilt thou stick at this? Hast thou any other way to the bosom of God but by him and yet, rather than thou wilt come thither by love, wilt thou damn thy soul by hating Christ? Is not the enjoyment of God worth the labour of love? (1 Thess. i. 3.) Shall all go, rather than be saved by love to thy Redeemer? 3. Consider, what he will do for thee, if thou art a sincere lorer of him.—He comes not to court thee, and flatter thee to thy loss; but his reward is great, and he brings it with him. (Rev. xxii. 12.) Give me leave to tell thee some particulars thereof. (1.) If thou wilt love him, he will betroth thee to himself in dearest love; (Hosea ii. 19, 20;) he will be thy bridegroom, and thou shalt be his bride; (Eph. v. 32;) it is not all thy filthy garments, rags, or poverty, that shall hinder; (Zech. iii. 4;) but he will be to thee the covering of thine eyes; (Gen. xx. 16;) and a gladness of heart shalt thou be unto him; (Zeph. iii. 17;) thou shalt be the joy of Christ himself; (Rev. xxi. 9;) for “as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.” (Isai. lxii. 5.) (2.) He will dwell with thee: (John xiv. 23, 24:) husband and wife dwell together, and so do the betrothed soul and Christ: “I in them, and they in me,” saith Christ. (John xvii. 23.) Now this is a privilege which carries many in the womb of it; such as are these: (i.) Intimacy and daily familiarity; Christ and Christians take their meals together; (Rev. iii.20;) there is no communion so near, as that which is between them: (Eph. v. 23:) “One spirit.” (1 Cor. vi. 17.) (ii.) Maintenance and provision. “He is worse than an infidel, that provides not for his own house.” (1 Tim. v. 8.) All that live under the same roof with Christ have their daily bread provided for them at his charges; and he hath said, that he will never leave them. (Heb. xiii. 5.) (iii.) Protection. Every man's house is his castle; they are under safe covert that dwell with Christ. (iv.) Counsel, guidance, and direction: this great husband dwells with all his family according to knowledge; (1 Peter iii. 7;) for he teacheth them all his secrets, and shows them his covenant. (Psalm xxv. 14.) (3.) He will interest thee in all his own riches, purchases, possessions, and dignities; together with his person, he offers heaven and earth for a dowry. All things are his by purchase, and thou shalt be a co-partner or co-heir with him, when thou art espoused to him. (Rom. viii. 17; 1 Cor. iii.22, 23.) (4.) He will manifest the highest indulgence and tenderness towards thee. (Isai. liv. 7, 8.) Not all thy cross walkings (if through temptations it shall so fall out) shall put him upon any more than a momentary departure from thee; for he hath resolved that his faithfulness towards thee shall never fail; (Psalm lxxxix. 33;) and there fore when thou seemest almost lost, and ready to despond, he will return to thee again; and the more time he hath lost by absence, the more full will his heart be of ravishing love and affections to thee. (Canticles vi. 3.) (5.) He will turn all to thy good: neither thy sins, though many and great, northy miseries, though overwhelming and discouraging, no, nor, lastly, shall death itself be ever able to make a divorce between thee and him; but serve as a passage to thee, when thy work is done, into the bride-chamber of thy Lord. (Rom. viii. 28, 38; Phil. i. 21.) And now tell me, hast not thou reason to love him? 4. Consider but thy case, while this virgin affection to thy Saviour is wanting. (1.) Thou multipliest thy whoredoms and thy abominations continually.—For what are thy intensive willings of other things, but so many acts of spiritual adultery, and base prostitutions of thy soul to thy dishonour and disadvantage, while other things usurp the room of Christ? (2.) Thou art a treacherous hypocrite and deceiver.—Forasmuch as thou pretendest to the eye of the world to be Christ's, and yet art nothing less than his. (3.) You lay a bar in against yourselves, and the acceptance of all your duties.—When “faith works by love,” (Gal. v. 6,) then is obedience illustrious, and meet for a gracious acceptation. That obedience which owes no part of itself to love, is worth little, and brings-in no more than it is worth. (4.) You make bonds for yourselves in death, and lay up terrible reproaches in your consciences against the day of judgment. (Job xxvii. 6.) (5.) You make your damnation necessary: there being no congruity to any of the divine attributes, much less to the offices of Christ, that that man should ever be saved, who never had any sincere affection to him. These are some of the considerations, which may be of use to them that have no spark of love yet kindled in their hearts. There are a few of the other kind, which may provoke to get this love inflamed where it is: such are these :— 1. Consider, the love of Christ to thee was a growing, increasing love. —I do not mean in respect of the habit, but in the outward demonstration thereof. The nearer he was to his death, the more exuberant in love; and when he rose again, his heart did overflow with tender indulgence; as appears by the meltings of his bowels towards Mary and over Peter; and much more may we believe him now to be full of them, now that he is at the right hand of God. 2. There is more loveliness in Christ, than ever thou canst find out or fathom.—When we have let out our affections to the utmost, there will still be more than we can find affection for; our love to eternity will have something of admiration mixed with it. 3. It is all you can return to him.—It is all he looks for at our hands. That which lies in love, and which flows from it, is the whole that is required to complete Christianity. 4. The more you love him, the more lovely you are unto him.—Then hath Christ the highest complacency in us, when our hearts are under the greatest raptures of love to him. 5. It is the honour of a man to love Christ superlatively.—It is the sweetest part of our lives, and that which Christ values us more by than by any thing else: it is heaven on earth. 6. According to the measure of your love, so will all the rest of your services and graces be.—That is, either more or less, better or worse. Love is like the master-wheel in an engine, making the whole soul to move faster or slower. These are the considerations of the last kind. Will some say?—“O, but what shall we do to get this blessed affection into our souls?" which was the third thing proposed: and in order thereto, I offer these DIRECTION I. Be well acquainted with the nature of this great duty. —The great mistake of the world lies in this, that is thought to be love, which is not; and thence men and women grow bold and confident, and value themselves more than they ought. I have given-in my best assistance, so far as the nature of the first case would permit, to prevent mistakes in this matter, before; and therefore I will not do it over again. Only remember, if you would not miscarry, that it is not a naked Christ, but a Christ advanced by incomparable personal excellences, and clothed with his offices of King, and Priest, and Prophet, that is THE CHRIST to be loved; and you cannot well miscarry. This is that damning mistake of the world; they love Christ, but not as dignified by God with any of his offices. DIREC. II. Be much in the study of yourselves.—What you were originally, and what you are since become through your own miscarriage, wilfulness, and folly. Take your souls to the glass of the law, and go from one precept to another; and when you have done there, go to the gospel: and be sure you do not deal slightly, but understand thoroughly how much you have offended. And when you have well studied the number and quality of your sins, then consider the justice and holiness of the eternal God, which you shall understand by the same law and gospel, where they speak the Divine terror against offending sinners; but more especially shall ye know it by going to the cross of Christ, and wisely and seriously considering the horror of that punishment which Christ there endured; for we never know as we ought the evil of sin, and our misery thereby, until we know what he endured to make an expiation for it. Do this, and do it faithfully. They that never knew themselves, they are most certainly without love to Christ: and it is enough to prove it; because, unless this foundation be first laid, they can see no sufficient reason for it. DIREC. III. Get a true conviction concerning thy own ultimate end and happiness.--Where it lies, namely, not in the objects of sense, (Matt. xvi. 26,) but in the beatifical vision of God. Possess thy soul, by scripture-light, of the grand importance of securing thy interest therein: while you think your happiness lies any where else than in God, it will be irrational to love Christ, because his purpose and design is to take our hearts from the pursuit of all but God. And until you know God to be your happiness, you will never understand the best reasons (that I may not say, the only) that you have to love him. That man loves Christ best that most fully knows God to be his eternal Rest and Blessedness, and loves him as such. DIREC. IV. Get a gospel knowledge of Christ.—Both what he was originally, and what he hath stooped and humbled himself to be for thy sake; why he came into the world, how he lived and died, and what was the covenant between the Father and him; how he is exalted and honoured by God, and what great things are promised both by Father and Son to all that in Christ sincerely draw nigh to God. O the sweet gales of affection which, by spiritual meditation upon Christ, will begin to blow within us! We cannot muse upon Christ's dying, and rising again, and inviting us to love him, but the fire will burn: a considering faith in Christ will naturally bud and blossom into love. DIREC. V. Believe the reality of his love to thee.—I mean, that he did all that ever he did for thee out of a hearty and real affection to thee; and that he still desires to have the match made up betwixt thy soul and himself. This fond prejudice, whereby souls put discouragements upon themselves, is that which spoils many a match. Do not weaken thy soul by making difficulties where there are none. If thou hearest Christ inviting, stir up thyself, O thou convinced soul, as if thou heardest him even calling to thee by name. Believe it, that Christ is never better pleased than when he is loved; and that he came no less to procure thy love than to testify his own. The way to love Christ in good earnest is to believe that he is so in his offers of grace to us. DIREC. VI. Understand the world thoroughly, and be jealous of thy own heart therein.—Remember that of the apostle, who knew what it was to love Christ, as well as any man ever did: “If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.” (1 John ii. 15.) We may well enough add, “Nor the love of the Son.” We may offer to our Lord cor fractum, or “a broken heart;” but we must not presume to desire him to accept our cor divisum, or “divided heart.” Remember that Christ and the world are two, contrary each to other; and the single stream of love cannot run two contrary ways at once. If our hearts be not crucified to the world, the love of Christ will never live within us. DIREC. VII. Be much in attendance on those means or ordinances, wherein Christ is evidently set forth, and by his Spirit wooing souls to lore him.—If faith comes by hearing, so no less certainly doth love. Christ most commonly honours his own ordinances and officers, in making up the match between himself and souls; so he did Paul. (2 Cor. xi. 2.) DIREC. VIII. Go to God and Christ for love.—When you have gotten your hearts well warmed with the use of all the fore-mentioned means, then go to God and Christ, and turn thy meditations into petitions. Plead hard and heartily all those moving considerations which were set down to usher-in these directions. God delights to honour prayer in this great work of his, in drawing souls to Christ. “No prayer, no. faith:” and it is as true, “No prayer, no love, no marriage to Christ.” I have done with the directions of the first kind; and have therein almost prevented myself from going any further; it being a rule in the spiritual, as well as the natural, growth, that we are nourished by the very same that gave us our first beings. If we know by what means we came by our love at first, and have but appetites whetted-on to a further growth, we need little more. And therefore having first persuaded you carefully to continue to practise-over the fore-mentioned directions, I only add:— DIREC. I. Consider much your own experiences, and the great advan tages you have made by this grace.—I need not tell what they are, because ye know them well enough already; and the sense of past advantage will best quicken to future diligence; which is the second direction. DIREC. II. Be constant in the exercise of that love ye have.—The best way to strengthen any habit, is to be often repeating its acts. We can not do any thing better to increase love, than to be often acting love. DIREC. III. Get faith more rooted.—And that will make your love to be more inflamed. If you would have fruitful branches, you must keep the root of the tree fat; and if you would have any grace to thrive, you must be sure to strengthen faith. DIREC. IV. Take heed you be not willingly guilty of any known wickedness against Christ.—For this will cause Christ to withdraw; it will occasion in thy heart a jealousy, and that will be an abatement of thy love. Be conscientiously diligent in all known duties. DIREC. V. Get thy heart daily more thoroughly crucified to the world, and better acquainted with heaven and the love of God.—The more you love God, the more you will and must love Christ. DIREC. VI. Be much in the communion of saints.—And then, especially when together with them, thou mayest look on, and admire the love of thy crucified Saviour in the Lord's supper. They that are most where Christ is to be enjoyed, love him best. And these are briefly the heads of DIRECTIONS in answer to each of these inquiries: they might have been more largely insisted on and pressed; but this defect must be supplied by yourselves. Remember, again, and with that I will conclude,-that it is not the knowledge of these directions that will advantage you, but the serious and diligent practice of them. And so “grace be with all them that,” in the diligent use of these means, get and inflame their “love to the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity.”

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Minerva is with the nine Muses on Helicon. She has just been told the story of their contest with the Pierides, and the Muses offer to repeat the stories which Calliope had sung so successfully in that challenge. The first of these is one of the longest in Ovid’s Metamorphoses, and tells of the rape of Proserpine. Calliope, the Muse of epic poetry, introduces and praises Ceres, goddess of the harvest, then abruptly takes us to the triangular island of Sicily, where Mount Etna is an active volcano, and much of her story is set. Living in fear of Etna’s eruptions is Pluto, the king of Hades, the underworld, who has left his dark kingdom, and is riding in his chariot to check that all remains well. Venus sees Pluto, and decides to get her son Cupid to make him fall in love with Proserpine (Greek Persephone), the young daughter of Ceres. Cupid selects his finest arrow, which strikes Pluto in the heart. Meanwhile Proserpine is playing and picking flowers by Lake Pergus, an idyllic spot: “While Proserpine once dallied in that grove, plucking white lilies and sweet violets, and while she heaped her basket, while she filled her bosom, in a pretty zeal to strive beyond all others; she was seen, beloved, and carried off by Pluto — such the haste of sudden love. “The goddess, in great fear, called on her mother and on all her friends; and, in her frenzy, as her robe was rent, down from the upper edge, her gathered flowers fell from her loosened tunic. — This mishap, so perfect was her childish innocence, increased her virgin grief. — “The ravisher urged on his chariot, and inspired his steeds; called each by name, and on their necks and manes shook the black-rusted reins.” As Pluto makes off with the young girl in his chariot, they pass a pool where the nymph Cyane lives. She tries to stop them, but Pluto opens up a cleft in the ground, and drives quickly through it down to his kingdom. Cyane is heartbroken: the mournful Cyane began to grieve, because from her against her fountain-rights the goddess had been torn. The deepening wound still rankled in her breast, and she dissolved in many tears, and wasted in those waves which lately were submissive to her rule. “So you could see her members waste away: her hones begin to bend; her nails get soft; her azure hair, her fingers, legs and feet, and every slender part melt in the pool: so brief the time in which her tender limbs were changed to flowing waves; and after them her back and shoulders, and her sides and breasts dissolved and vanished into rivulets: and while she changed, the water slowly filled her faulty veins instead of living blood — and nothing that a hand could hold remained. Cyane – whose name means the blue colour that we know as cyan – has melted away in her tears of grief. Ceres has missed her daughter, and starts searching the world for her. As it is getting dark, she looks for somewhere to rest: “Wearied with labour she began to thirst, for all this while no streams had cooled her lips; when, as by chance, a cottage thatched with straw gladdened her sight. Thither the goddess went, and, after knocking at the humble door, waited until an ancient woman came; who, when she saw the goddess and had heard her plea for water, gave her a sweet drink, but lately brewed of parched barley-meal; and while the goddess quaffed this drink a boy, of bold and hard appearance, stood before and laughed and called her greedy. While he spoke the angry goddess sprinkled him with meal, mixed with the liquid which had not been drunk. “His face grew spotted where the mixture struck, and legs appeared where he had arms before, a tail was added to his changing trunk; and lest his former strength might cause great harm, all parts contracted till he measured less than common lizards. While the ancient dame wondered and wept and strove for one caress, the reptile fled and sought a lurking place. — His very name describes him to the eye, a body starred with many coloured spots.” For his rudeness to the goddess, the boy has been transformed into a spotted newt. Ceres continues the search for her missing daughter. She reaches Cyane’s pool, but after her transformation that nymph is unable to tell her what happened. Guessing that her girl had been abducted, Ceres tears her hair and clothing. The harvest of Sicily is destroyed in that grief. At last, Arethusa tells Ceres of Pluto’s abduction of her daughter. Ceres goes straight to Jupiter, Proserpine’s father, and pleads the case that the girl should be freed from Hades. Jupiter agrees on the condition – which is set by the Fates – that Proserpine has not eaten whilst in the underworld. Sadly, that proves not to be the case: “Not so the Fates permit. — The virgin, thoughtless while she strayed among the cultivated Stygian fields, had broken fast. While there she plucked the fruit by bending a pomegranate tree, and plucked, and chewed seven grains, picked from the pallid rind; and none had seen except Ascalaphus— him Orphne, famed of all Avernian Nymphs, had brought to birth in some infernal cave, days long ago, from Acheron’s embrace— he saw it, and with cruel lips debarred young Proserpine’s return. Heaving a sigh, the Queen of Erebus, indignant changed that witness to an evil bird: she turned his head, with sprinkled Phlegethonian lymph, into a beak, and feathers, and great eyes; his head grew larger and his shape, deformed, was cased in tawny wings; his lengthened nails bent inward; — and his sluggish arms as wings can hardly move. So he became the vilest bird; a messenger of grief; the lazy owl; sad omen to mankind.” Ascalaphus is transformed into a screech-owl for being sole witness to Proserpine’s nibbling at a pomegranate. The daughters of Achelous, water-nymphs who were playing with Proserpine when she was abducted by Pluto, are tranformed into the Sirens, half-woman and half-bird, for their inattention to her care. Jupiter is forced to compromise over the fate of Proserpine: the mediator of these rival claims, urged by his brother and his grieving sister, divided the long year in equal parts. Now Proserpina, as a Deity, of equal merit, in two kingdoms reigns: — for six months with her mother she abides, and six months with her husband. — Both her mind and her appearance quickly were transformed; for she who seemed so sad in Pluto’s eyes, now as a goddess beams in joyful smiles; so, when the sun obscured by watery mist conquers the clouds, it shines in splendour forth.” Thus it is Proserpine’s half-year spent with her mother Ceres during which the land is fertile and food can be grown; when she returns to Pluto in Hades, the earth lies barren through the winter. For such a vile rape of a young girl, Ovid’s account is long, relatively sensitive, and dramatic; it has inspired many paintings, of which I show here a small selection of the finest and most significant. This story has been popular among artists since classical times. In a small royal tomb found at Vergina in Macedonia, there is a superb wall-painting of Hades Abducting Persephone which dates from 340 BCE. The view above shows the whole of Pluto’s chariot, with its horses, while the detail below shows Proserpine being carried by Pluto within, with sophisticated modelling of the heads and fabrics. Niccolò dell’Abbate’s The Rape of Proserpine (c 1570) gives a fine account of Ovid’s story using multiplex narrative. Under ink-black clouds associated with Hades, Pluto is seen carrying Proserpine up a hill. At the far right, he is about to drive his chariot into a huge cavern, which will take them down into the underworld. In the foreground, Cyane is by her pool, and about to literally dissolve into tears in its water. Six other nymphs, the daughters of Achelous, are also protesting at the girl’s abduction. Rembrandt’s The Abduction of Proserpina (c 1631) is probably the earliest real masterpiece to show this story, although he deviates significantly from Ovid’s version. Pluto is trying to drive his chariot away, with Proserpine inside it. She is putting up fierce resistance, though, and trying to fend him off. Hanging on to the hem of Proserpine’s floral dress is a woman who should perhaps be her mother Circe, but bears the crescent moon normally associated with Diana. Pluto’s chariot is being drawn by two black horses, through an ethereal almost fluid carpet of flowers. The horses and chariot are about to disappear into a black cleft in the earth, and make their descent to the underworld. Peter Paul Rubens also shows a composite story, in his superb The Rape of Proserpina (1636-38). Pluto’s face looks the part, his eyes bulging and staring at Minerva, who is trying to stop the girl from being abducted. Below the chariot, the basketful of flowers which Proserpine had been picking is scattered on the ground. Rubens shows irresistable movement to the right, as Pluto struggles to lift the girl into his chariot. Two winged Cupids are preparing to drive the black horses on, once the couple are secured inside. Few artists have been diverted by the side-stories offered here by Ovid. Adam Elsheimer, though, depicted Ceres at Hecuba’s Home in about 1605: this is believed to be a copy made in his workshop of his original. The young boy is mocking Ceres slaking her thirst during her search for the missing Proserpine; for that, he is about to be turned into a newt. Paintings showing the abduction of Proserpine inevitably became far less frequent during the eighteenth century. But in the nineteenth, more sensitive approaches started to appear. In the late years of Dante Gabriel Rossetti’s career, he became quite obsessed with Proserpine, and from 1871 made at least eight paintings of her. The image above show his last, Proserpine, which he completed shortly before his death in 1882. She stares into the distance, clutching her partly-eaten pomegranate, an oil lamp guttering below. The verses at the top right read: Afar away the light that brings cold cheer Unto this wall, – one instant and no more Admitted at my distant palace-door. Afar the flowers of Enna from this drear Dire fruit, which, tasted once, must thrall me here Afar those skies from this Tartarean gray That chills me: and afar, how far away, The nights that shall be from the days that were. Afar from mine own self I seem and wind Strange ways in thought, and listen for a sign: And still some heart unto some soul doth pine, (Whose sounds mine inner sense is fain to bring, Continually together murmuring,) “Woe’s me for thee, unhappy Proserpine”! At the same time, an almost unknown Pre-Raphaelite, George Wilson, painted two works derived from the myth. His Rape of Proserpine is in a private collection and I have been unable to locate a usable image of it, but The Spring Witch (c 1880) was inspired by Jupiter’s compromise in which she spent half her life in Hades, and half above. Wilson shows Proserpine when she has just emerged from the underworld, to start her six months sojourn with her mother. She holds a fateful pomegranate in her left hand, from which a magical fibrous band emerges to wind around her body. These are wonderful paintings of a story which is horrific even for a classical myth. There’s something truly magical about Rembrandt’s, though, which I think sets it apart. That deep blue night sky, the fluid carpet of flowers, and the forward rush of the fierce lion on the front of Pluto’s chariot: I haven’t seen another Rembrandt quite like it. The English translation of Ovid above is taken from Ovid. Metamorphoses. Tr. Brookes More. Boston. Cornhill Publishing Co. 1922, at Perseus. I am very grateful to Perseus at Tufts for this.

I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I haven’t been touched like that in years. I haven’t felt this way ever. Please don’t make this something sleazy. I couldn’t bear it. Kieran never even looks at me anymore and I’m supposed to live like a Madonna while he cheats on me with a child. No. It’s not fair. I deserved this, you said so yourself. I’m worth more than this – this life. You meant that, didn’t you? Yes, I did. But my job is to give you a safe place to heal. I can’t – I can’t be your therapist anymore. Oh God, I did it again, didn’t I? I ruined the one good thing I had. I understand. I’ll – I won’t bother you anymore. I went after him, ready to tell him everything. He loved me. He would forgive me and I would be a better wife. I would quit. I would never let Mikey touch me again. I saw him flirting with some bartender and that’s when I knew. He didn’t love me. Perhaps he never had. I stood there watching them and tried to think of the last time Kieran told me he loved me. Never. Not once. But surely, I thought, when the boy was born. He must have said it then. But no, he’d said, “Thank you for our son, love.” That is not the same as saying I love you. My mind went further back, to our wedding, to when he proposed. He’d said the vows, “to love and to keep,” he’d said we could be happy, but never that he loved me. All this time, I thought I was the weak link, that I was the problem. I can’t believe I got this so wrong. The tears began to fall and Henry reached over to try and console her. It’s so empty and quiet downstairs. I had to reschedule your appointment for later than usual. You’re my last patient for the day. I kind of like it. It feels like we’re the only people left in the world. You seem different today. What’s been happening? Do I? I guess it’s because I’m going back to work. I’m a little nervous but it feels good to leave the house for something other than doctors’ appointments. Anyway, Kieran is a little upset but I can’t worry about that, can I? This is who I was when he met me, I can’t just drop everything because he married me and I had his child. I want to at least try to get my life back and I think being around people and doing some of the things I used to will help. Staying home isn’t. It feels like I can finally breathe! I’m going to the club right after this session, actually. It’s nice to see you so happy. It’s nice to feel so happy. He has this cousin, Grace. She used to be a he, so I guess she has some problems. So in the beginning, he used to go see her all the time. Every Wednesday like clockwork. After we got married, after the pregnancy got bad, I was scared of being home alone for more than a few hours. What did I know of babies? He was so… I don’t know a way to put it without it sounding… Don’t worry about that. Just tell me. At first, he was so loving, doting even. He used to play the piano for me and the baby. He would rub lotion on my belly and talk to it. We took naps together. But then, a couple of weeks became a month, two months. He grew sullen. He was constantly on the phone. I think Grace was upset that I was taking so much of his time. I told him to go, that I would be fine. That his family should come first. He left the next day and was gone for a week. When he came back, he seemed happier, so I thought a week alone, unable to really do much of anything on my own was worth it. To see that look on his face again, it was worth it. The phone calls started up almost immediately. I became upset. I know his family is important to him but I’d hoped that after we married, I’d be important too, that I’d be family. I didn’t want to cause a fuss though, so when he said he had to leave again, I smiled and said okay. He left and didn’t come back for what felt like weeks. When he asked me to marry him, I thought my life would change. I thought he would make things better. He promised to be there for me. I think – I think I ruined it, like I ruin everything else. I wanted so much. Too much, I guess. Why do you say that? He’s pulling away. He’s become so distant. I’m worried that he regrets marrying me. I – I’m afraid of being…of being intimate with him. My body is so very different after the baby. What if – what if he finds me ugly now? He has this version of me in his head and sometimes I see disappointment in his eyes when he looks at me. I’ve tried working out more. I’m so thin, I’ve lost my breast milk. But still, he looks at me and I feel so discouraged. What am I going to do? He wanted a girl. We were at the doctor’s for a regular checkup. And the tech asked if we wanted to know what we were having. I wanted to be surprised, but Kieran wanted to know. He’s like that, doesn’t like surprises. When the woman told him it was a boy, he looked so disappointed. He actually argued with her about it. My heart broke a little that day. Now when I look at Colin and him together, I wonder if he resents the baby or me for not giving him what he wanted. Don’t you think he’s just happy for a healthy baby? Oh, I don’t doubt that. And I know we aren’t in a good place right now, but I hope I can give him the girl he seems to want so much. That is a desperate wish of mine. One day, maybe. Sorry I’m late. Colin was being fussy. That’s alright. I’d like us to try for a happy memory today. Finding out I was pregnant. I kept feeling nauseated and tired, unable to focus on anything. I knew, without even having to take a test, I knew and I spent a few weeks just thinking. What would I do? Would I keep it? Then my grandmother called and said she wanted to meet Kieran and that I was to bring him to Lucky Palms the following week. You don’t say no to my grandmother. I did that once, it’s how I ended up dancing at that club. So I told Kieran, who agreed to meet her. Grandmother was the very first of my family and friends that he met. We’d been together about…three months then? Anyway, I made an appointment to confirm the pregnancy and get a sense of how far along I was. Eight weeks. Hearing Colin’s heart beating on that monitor made me so giddy! When I told him, Kieran looked shell shocked and I was worried that I’d read him wrong. For a second I thought he’d be angry. But then he asked me to marry him. He said he wanted to be there for me. He wanted us to be happy and that he’d take care of me. Kieran was a virgin when we met. Even now I find that a hard thing to believe. I should have guessed maybe, but he’d always seemed so self-aware. He didn’t even tell me until it was almost too late. If I’d known, I would have seduced him a little, made it special. As it was, there wasn’t much of a mood and it was quick, a little rough, very perfunctory. But I can’t blame him, it was his first time. Are you satisfied with your sex life? Right now? We barely have one. But in the beginning it was good. He was willing to learn and pregnancy does something to your libido…there was a lot of sex in the beginning. There was this guy, Mikey. He used to come by a lot before Kieran. He would pay for a private dance with me and he was so creepy. Whenever I would begin to dance, he would touch himself. Your boss let him do that? Mikey paid extra. I’d become too spoiled with Kieran, I’d forgotten for a while that this was the real reason men went to a place like that. It wasn’t for my skill as a conversationalist but because I’m moderately pretty. These men could go there and relieve themselves and I would always be willing, always receptive. They could take their frustrations against the female population out on me; call me dirty, demeaning names, and I would let them. And for the few that could afford it, they would degrade me, like Mikey did. Objectify me and turn me into 3-D porn, and I would smile and dance through it all. And thank God for the dancing. Before I came to this town, I’d been with the Roaring Heights Academy of Dance. If it hadn’t been for the loss of monetary support from my grandmother, I’d have graduated. The stripping started out as a way of earning money but I couldn’t go back to school every morning knowing what I’d done the previous night, what I’d be doing later. Before Mikey left that one night, he told me he was getting tired of coming in his hand, that one day we would go on a real date. Mikey is…persistent.

- You may wish to consult Out of Time (disambiguation)for other, similarly-named pages. It saw the fracturing of Gwen Cooper's affair with Owen Harper even further when he struck a second libido-driven relationship with Diane Holmes, who was removed from a bygone era after passing through the Cardiff Rift. Although Owen meant to use her simply for sexual favours, pleasure gave way to romance, and he began falling in love with her. However, Diane chose to part ways with Owen and return to the past through the Rift. The hope of seeing her again later influenced him to spur a disastrous act near the end of the series. A plane called the Sky Gypsy lands on a Cardiff air strip. Out step the pilot, Diane Holmes, and passengers Emma-Louise Cowell and John Ellis. The Torchwood team welcome them. The people on the plane think that they are in the year 1953, but Jack informs them they fell through the rift and were transported over fifty years into their future. The team make it their duty to look after the occupants of the plane until they can adapt to the 21st century. Gwen looks after Emma. She takes her home, where she lies to Rhys that Emma is her cousin and that she came for a visit. The couple take her to a nightclub, where Emma soon gains the attentions of a young man. Gewn and Rhys separate Emma from the man when they start kissing, and Gwen explains to her that things are different than in the 1950s. Emma eventually finds a job as a shop-girl in London. Gwen is hesitant, wanting to get her a job in Cardiff where she can look after her, but she has to change her mind when Rhys discovers that Emma is not Gwen's cousin and is upset at just how easily Gwen lied to him. Gwen agrees to let Emma go and tells her to not talk to strangers when travelling to London. As Emma leaves, they wish each other a happy Christmas. Meanwhile, Jack starts a friendship with John, who wants to find his son, Alan. Tosh finds him, and John pays a visit, but is devastated to find his son is suffering from Alzheimer's disease. Severely depressed, John takes Ianto's car to kill himself by carbon monoxide poisoning. Jack tries to convince him to stop, but John says that he died decades ago. A reluctant Jack joins him in the car, as a friend, as the carbon monoxide slowly kills John. Jack's immortality leaves him unaffected; all he can do is express sorrow at the sight of another life cut short. Owen, meanwhile, looks after Diane, who wants to fly, but can't because her license expired decades ago. Owen convinces her to go out to lunch with him and they soon begin a sexual relationship. As it progresses, Owen falls in love with Diane, and she admits to the same feelings. One morning, Owen finds she has gone, having left a note on his pillow. He rushes to the airfield, where he finds Diane attempting to take off in the Sky Gypsy. Owen tries to convince her to stay, but she is confident that due to the exact weather conditions from where she took off being present now, the rift will open again and take her back to her own time. After she kisses Owen goodbye, she takes off and her plane disappears into the clouds. Heartbroken, Owen cries softly. In the end, Jack, Gwen and Owen think back on how the three have touched their lives. - Captain Jack Harkness - John Barrowman - Gwen Cooper - Eve Myles - Owen Harper - Burn Gorman - Toshiko Sato - Naoko Mori - Ianto Jones - Gareth David-Lloyd - Rhys Williams - Kai Owen - Diane - Louise Delamere - John Ellis - Mark Lewis Jones - Emma - Olivia Hallinan - Alan Ellis - Sam Beazley - Nurse - Marion Fenner - Alesha - Janine Carrington - Jade - Rhea Bailey - Flying Instructor - Andrew MacBean - Barman - Ciaran Dowd Created by Russell T Davies |Executive Producers Russell T Davies and Julie Gardner| |Not every person who worked on this adventure was credited. The absence of a credit for a position doesn't necessarily mean the job wasn't required. The information above is based solely on observations of the actual end credits of the episodes as broadcast, and does not relay information from IMDB or other sources.| - Glitter and Miss B are magazines. - Cardiff Examiner is a Cardiff newspaper. - South Wales Mail is a South Wales newspaper. - Emma was flying to Dublin to visit Auntie Nora and Uncle Finn, who have been having trouble with their kids and want her to babysit for them. - Jack mentions that he has died once and that he fell through time. - Amelia Earhart, another famous woman pilot, went missing on 2 July, 1937. - Owen decides to make Diane a "f*ck buddy". - Emma mentions Deborah Kerr. - Emma wants Super Excel Waterproof Luscious Lashes Mascara. - Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata" is playing on John's radio. - "I See You Baby" is playing in the bar. - "Just Blew in from the Windy City" from Calamity Jane is Emma's favourite song. Story notes Edit - This is the first Torchwood episode to have no antagonist or enemy of any kind. - There are similarities between this episode and the Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "The Neutral Zone", in which three people from the late-20th century are discovered cryogenically frozen in the year 2364 and must adjust to the era they find themselves in. The primary difference between the two episodes is that the temporally-displaced people are the focus of the narrative in Out of Time, while in the Star Trek episode theirs is the B-story for the episode. - 1.03 million viewers. Filming locations Edit - Plane landing at the beginning of the episode - RAF St Athan, Vale of Glamorgan - John visits the Millennium Stadium's gate 3 - Westgate Street, Cardiff - The restaurant Owen and Diane visit is The Pearl of the Orient - Cardiff Bay. Production errors Edit - The events occur in December. However, in several scenes, including those of the airfield and outside the supermarket, the foliage on the trees indicates that the episode was filmed during the summertime. - During a scene in the conference room, a window can be clearly seen behind the characters, and a street can be seen outside. This is impossible because the Hub is underground. - Gwen's sleeping with Owen is obliquely referred to when discussing changed sexual attitudes with Emma. (TV: Countrycide) Home video releases Edit DVD releases Edit - Out of Time was first released on DVD, with three other episodes as Torchwood: Series 1, part 3 on 26 March 2007. - It was later included in Torchwood: The Complete First Series set on 19 November 2007. - It was also released in the Series 1-4 boxset (Region 2 release: 14 November 2011.) Blu-ray releases Edit - Released in the US with the rest of Series 1 as a Complete First Season set on 16 September 2008. - It was released in the Series 1-3 Blu-ray boxset on 26 October 2009 in the UK. The US release was on 19 July 2011. - It was also released in the Series 1-4 Blu-ray boxset. (Region 2 release: 14 November 2011) - Out of Time at Shannon Sullivan's A Brief History of Time (Travel) - Out of Time at The Locations Guide - The Discontinuity Guide to: Out of Time at The Whoniverse

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One of the most central mind control pattern has been to simply reverse everything and get people under the illusion that bad things are good, and good things are bad, that they love hate and hate love, at least on a subconscious level. This pattern has gone so far that at this point most people don’t even realize how much it affects them. The most obvious place to encounter this programming is in the movie business. Horror and other dark occurings are presented in a cynical way and considered to add interest to a story, in fact it has become quite unconceivable to imagine a story without these things, it would seem boring and useless. In this context seeing pain on the screen (and then in real life) has become funny, and loving and peaceful attentions become ridiculous. This deeply affects people’s sense of imagination and therefore also their choices and what they manifest as creators. This enforces a Stockholm syndrome where people think they love their enslavement and lives of suffering, or at least agree to it to some degree. This has disconnected people from what a normal life in connection with Source/creator really is. Imagine a life where suffering is not part of a good and fulfilling adventure. Where everything that is needed is being unconditionally given moment after moment, generating an unlimited spiral of evolution in happiness and bliss. Language is one aspect of our lives where this reversal programming has been deeply anchored. Words are made of archetypal sounds, vibrations, manifestation tools. It is famous that Lucifer means the Light bearer, but instead that word has been reversed in people’s mind to mean something very dark. The same principle has been applied to many words, especially to those meant to depict the sacred feminine. For example the word ‘monster’ is composed of two syllables : mon and ster which actually mean Moon-Star. The word ‘demon’ actually means Moon Goddess (Dei/Dea in Latin means God/Goddess, from where we get the word deity, and mon is short for moon, like ‘monday’ means moon-day). The Moon Star is especially interesting because it’s the chosen symbol for islam, and it is also depicted at the top of the OM symbol : Our subconscious understands archetypal sounds, it hears the same thing in monster and moon-star. Symbolism is a form of language and it is now famous how so many sacred symbols have been hijacked and their meaning reversed in the mind of the masses. Cobra has summed it up well : “What they do is to take a symbol of Light and use mass media propaganda to entrain people to associate that symbol with darkness, pain and suffering and to suppress Goddess energy. Thus they prevent an enormous amount of Light from flowing into the minds and hearts of people. They have done so with number 666 (once a sacred number of Goddess Venus, now a symbol of the dark forces in the mind of the masses), with the pentagram (once a sacred symbol of Goddess Venus and now a symbol of black magic for the uneducated masses), with Lucifer (once a symbol of Goddess Venus- Light bearer- morning star, now a symbol of the leader of the dark forces for the unaware), with swastika (once a symbol of spiritual evolution and now associated with Nazism)” The number 6 is written as a spiral, this is why it has this symbolism. There are many other less-known symbolism all over mass media. The dark forces are psychopathic, they have infiltrated mystery schools and started using the symbolism but they do not really understand what they’re doing. They see everything as a source of power but do not understand the nature of these powers. A good example of this is the japanese car brand ‘Subaru’, that word means Pleiades in Japanese and the symbol of the car brand is pretty clear : Back to language, another sacred feminine word that has been reversed is the word Cunt. It means vagina and in the masses mind it now has become a very bad insult. It actually comes from the Sanskrit word Kunda which is associated with Shakti, and from that same root word came the word country (the Earth womb/vagina from where life comes out), and the word kind : ‘being kind’ or ‘the same kind’ are both feminine notions. Originally in ancient times the word Cunt was said to a woman as a very nice compliment about her beauty and feminine power, and it is now seen as an insult by the masses. This kind of reversal is also very obvious in slang, where all sorts of words with connotations of violence and suffering are used to mean something good : badass, kickass, killer, etc. This is not new though, it’s been done for centuries. For example why does the word awe-some (meaning it brings ‘some awe’) means good, but the word awful (‘full of awe’) means horrible ? This also not only concerns english, but all the main languages on the planet. This reversal programming between good and bad creates compartimentalization in the psyche : we are entrained to think a sound means a certain thing in our conscious mind, while the subconscious mind knows it means something else. Thus it creates walls between the conscious and subconscious, making them more difficult to connect with each other. This occult programming of language has been clearly defined : we spell words (letter by letter), like magic spells, and we write words, ‘write’ being pronounced just like a rite which is a ceremony (a ritual). Our terminology is actually a set of terms and conditions, but we can reclaim archetypal sounds and declare our own terms based on truth and explore all areas of our psyche to see what we really choose to accept and love in our reality. Liberation Now ! A Post from Untwine Source : http://recreatingbalance1.blogspot.com/2016/02/reverse-programming-and-language.html Disclaimer: We at Prepare for Change (PFC) bring you information that is not offered by the mainstream news, and therefore may seem controversial. The opinions, views, statements, and/or information we present are not necessarily promoted, endorsed, espoused, or agreed to by Prepare for Change, its leadership Council, members, those who work with PFC, or those who read its content. However, they are hopefully provocative. Please use discernment! Use logical thinking, your own intuition and your own connection with Source, Spirit and Natural Laws to help you determine what is true and what is not. By sharing information and seeding dialogue, it is our goal to raise consciousness and awareness of higher truths to free us from enslavement of the matrix in this material realm.

I wanted to give myself a challenge for this month, but then October snuck up on me and caught me undecided. So instead I will simply make use of a habit I have been nurturing for quite a while now: reading. I just don’t write about my reading experiences and I guess that’s where the challenge comes in. I am notoriously bad at writing reviews, preferring to just leave a star rating and then move on to the next book. I hope that by journaling a month of reading, I will be more comfortable write down and share my thoughts and opinions about a particular piece of writing. Another goal for my October Reading Challenge is to finally finish all these books I have begun reading and have never quite finished (mostly non-fiction titles). This way I can jump into November with a clean reading slate! NaNoWriMo is coming up next month, so doing a challenge that won’t require as much energy and time commitment, is probably the better choice now. You don’t want to run a 5K the day before running a marathon, right? Or maybe you do? I don’t know too much about running, but I felt this is an apt metaphor. I’ll see if I can stretch some of my other creative muscles as well during this month (i.e. photography, drawing) and integrate some of the results into this article. I continued reading The Great Alone by Kristin Hannah. I’ve been past the midway point and I am catching myself skimming a lot of passages here and there and don’t feel I’ve been missing them. Now that a few more interesting developments have occurred, I am interested in how they will unfold. I have a few books I am currently reading and I often like to switch around between non-fiction books to give me time to digest what I’ve learned. Rarely do I need a break from a fiction book, unless it cannot keep my interest. I will wait until I finish, The Great Alone, before being more specific about the issues I have had so far. The Great Alone … wasn’t so great after all. I wanted to give it every chance to make its last 200 pages count, but in the end, it was a letdown. Especially the last fifth of the book felt rather rushed. The plot points reminded me of Where The Crawdad Sings by Delia Owens, one of my favorite books. Sadly the characters and the pacing are nowhere near the level of Owen’s work. Pretty much every character apart from the main protagonist seems to be based on a trope. There were multiple instances in which enormous problems for the protagonist were solved by either a phone call or another character taking care of the issue for her. For most of the book, she was rather passive. October 3 & 4 I finished the non-fiction book Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life by Amy Gahran, an illuminating look at social conventions for relationships and alternatives to them. It draws a lot of its content from the experiences of not only polyamorous / non-monogamous people but from all over the sexuality/relationship spectrum. The only way you can be sure you’ve succeeded on the Escalator is when neither of you has sex with anyone else, and then someone dies.Mari Helena, solo poly, From Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator They supplied most paragraphs with excerpts from a survey the author conducted. Almost like reading the example sentence in a dictionary to grasp how a word is being used, these real-life examples helped me understand how the concepts are affecting people and their relationships. Today I finished The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy. While it doesn’t go quite as in-depth on the various relationship constellations like Stepping off The Relationship Escalator and the experiences of the people within them, it offers more practical tips on how to have a safe experience while opening yourself or your relationship up to polyamory (or other adventures). It is a very tongue-in-cheek sex-positive book and makes for an entertaining read. It would probably be my recommendation for anyone interested in ‘Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures. One of the things people get out of multiple relationships is the chance to be all of their various selves.The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy While I still listen to another non-fiction audiobook right now (i.e. Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships), I look forward to diving into some fantastical fiction! These past few days I’ve been plagued by migraines, most likely related to me quitting caffeine and eating a bunch of migraine-triggering foods (I just can’t say no to fresh-baked bread, cheese, and chocolate). Luckily audio sensitivity is not on the list of symptoms, so I could keep listening to Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha. Allyson Johnson did an excellent job reading the source material. The book offers convincing arguments that what we have learned about human sexual behavior might be more guided by confirmation biases, rather than what seems to be the logical conclusion. It challenges various theories on human sexual behaviors like those that humans are a deeply monogamous species and offers sound evidence in support of our sexually more promiscuous nature. I haven’t ventured far into anthropological studies, but if I can find other similarly well-written and engaging texts, this won’t be my last book on the topic! “Why is it so easy to believe that a mother’s love isn’t a zero-sum proposition, but that sexual love is a finite resource?”Christopher Ryan, Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships How Not to Write a Novel: 200 Classic Mistakes and How to Avoid Them—A Misstep-by-Misstep Guide was one of these books that sat on my ‘Currently Reading’ list for weeks. I finished it last night, while quietly chuckling to not wake up my wife. Having read a bunch of writing books, I was pleasantly surprised how much this one cracked me up. The authors accompany every mistake by a paragraph or two of silly over-the-top faux writing. While the examples make it clear why no person in the right mind should write like this, the advice that follows lays it all out humorously with some tips on how to avoid creating similar drivel. While it was not the most in-depth writing guide I’ve read, its humor kept me engaged throughout. “Giving a reader a sex scene that is only half right is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitten; it is a bloody, godawful mess.”Howard Mittelmark, How Not to Write a Novel: 200 Classic Mistakes and How to Avoid Them—A Misstep-by-Misstep Guide An experienced writer might not gain much from a guide like this, apart from the occasional chuckle at the hilariously awful examples. I think it is a valuable book for most beginning writers, since chances are, you’ll find a few of the mistakes in your writing. And once you do, you can laugh about it (and change it before you submit it). Picking from my ‘Currently reading’ books, I finished Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) by Jeff Strand. I really enjoy the great mixture of humor, horror, and the straightforward writing style that makes for a relaxed bedtime reading. “Why do we come here instead of someplace masculine, like a bar?” “Because we’re both deeply lame human beings. And I can smoke here.” “You quit.” “I like having options.” Roger took a sip of his double mocha latte.Graverobbers Wanted (No Experience Necessary) BY JEFF STRAND Instead of picking one of my other unfinished books, I immediately continued to read the follow-up book Single White Psychopath Seeks Same and am now reading the third of the series Casket For Sale. At that rate, I won’t clear out my list, but will have the series finished by the end of the month. 😀 I got distracted for a few days, throwing myself into yet another one of my creative endeavours and dealing with some less than enjoyable problems in my day-to-day life. So how about I bribe you all with some pointless digital art I’ve thrown together? Bacchanal by Veronica Henry has a lot going for it: A woman with the ability to communicate with animals, a mysterious carnival traveling across the US in the 1930s, and demonic dangers lurking just around the corner. Sadly, despite all these imaginative elements, I had several major issues with the book. While some scenes, especially at the beginning of the book, are interesting and exciting, the plot seems to crawl at a snail’s pace after that. There are many scenes full of long character exposition or interactions that don’t seem to move the plot forward. Entire scenes simply lay out the complete backstory for characters. While a good backstory can be fascinating, it is not very satisfying to read a few pages about a character’s past, framed as introspection. I would much rather learn about these things through character interactions or through actions. I also had a hard time keeping track of many of the characters and couldn’t tell you much about them, apart from the bare minimum. I am not sure what the main character Liza’s motivation is. I know technically what her motivation is, but I don’t feel that it ultimately matters to her. Her focus seems to shift back and forth between multiple issues. There are a few interesting hooks and genuinely scary moments, but none of these seem to move the plot forward, only hinting at things to come. Whoops! October is already behind us and I am now finding myself deep within NaNoWriMo territory (more on that in a separate post). While I spent part of Halloween on the Schooner Lynx for a nice little sailing trip at the yearly Sultana Downrigging Festival, I also finished the third book Casket For Sale (Only Used Once) in the Andrew Mayhem series, bringing the total of finished books to 10 during this little self-imposed challenge. I am pretty happy with the results. Taking a moment to reflect on a finished book is a practice I will try to keep up in the future. Did you ever do a similar challenge? If so, what were your main takeaways? Did you enjoy the experience?

This past June, the United States Supreme Court held that discrimination against gay and transgender employees is illegal under Tile VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1968, the federal law that prohibits discrimination in the workplace based on race, color, religion, sex, and national origin. Prior to this decision, courts around the country had disagreed as to whether Title VII’s prohibition against discrimination based on sex (and gender) also protects gay and transgender employees from discrimination at work. Now we know that it does. The Supreme Court’s opinion was based on three cases in which employers fired long-time employees shortly after the employees revealed that they were gay or transgender. The first plaintiff, Gerald Bostock, was a child welfare advocate in Clayton County, Georgia. After a decade of successful employment, Mr. Bostock began participating in a gay recreational softball league and, soon after, influential members of the community allegedly made disparaging comments about him. Mr. Bostock was subsequently fired for conduct “unbecoming” to a county employee. The second plaintiff, Donald Zarda, was a skydiving instructor in New York. After several seasons with the company, Mr. Zarda mentioned that he was gay. He was fired days later. Aimee Stephens worked at a funeral home in Garden City, Michigan. When she was hired, she presented as male. Six years later, Ms. Stephens wrote a letter to her employer explaining that she was planning to transition and to “live and work full-time as a woman.” The funeral home fired her, telling her “this is not going to work out.” The Supreme Court held that it is a violation of Title VII for an employer to fire someone for being gay or transgender, because “it is impossible to discriminate against a person for being homosexual or transgender without discriminating against that individual based on sex.” If an employer fires a male employee for being attracted to men, the employer discriminates against him for a trait or action that it would tolerate in a female colleague. Similarly, if an employer fires a person who was identified as male at birth but who now identifies as female, but retains an otherwise identical employee who was identified as female at birth, the employer penalizes the person identified as male at birth for traits or actions that it tolerates in an employee identified as female at birth. In both cases, “the individual employee’s sex plays an unmistakable and impermissible role in the discharge decision.” In other words, to discriminate against a person for being gay or transgender also “requires an employer to intentionally treat [them] differently because of their sex.” The Court clarified that an employer cannot avoid liability by arguing that its discrimination was motivated by the employee’s gender identity or sexual orientation, and not by the employee’s sex/gender. When an employer fires an employee because they are gay or transgender, there may be two causes—both the individual’s sex and something else, namely, the sex to which the individual is attracted or with which the individual identifies. But where sex is a cause, the employer can’t avoid liability by saying that another factor also contributed. Neither the label that the employer gives to the discriminatory act nor the motivations involved (ie, the employer’s argument that their intention was to fire the employee based on transgender status, for example, rather than based on sex) are relevant. The Court also clarified that an employer cannot avoid liability by arguing that it would fire both male and female employees who are gay or transgender. That’s because Title VII prohibits discrimination against individuals, not against categories or groups. An employer who fires a woman for refusing his sexual advances cannot avoid liability by showing that he gave equal or preferential treatment to female employees in general. Nor is it a defense for an employer to say that it discriminates against both men and women because of sex: Instead of avoiding Title VII exposure, that employer doubles it. Oregon law already prohibits discrimination in the workplace based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Now we know that federal law offers those same protections to LGBTQ employees. If you are interested, you can find the Court’s full written opinion here: https://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/19pdf/17-1618_hfci.pdf.

This summer we were blessed with so many interesting anime. One, in particular, that caught my eye, and was one of the most interesting I’ve seen in a while, goes by the name of “Re: Zero: Starting Life in Another World”. Now, I first encountered this show by just scrolling down my timeline on Facebook and seeing a gif on Crunchyroll’s page. I got so hyped because the fight scene was dope and kind of reminded me of Black Lagoon. So I went and looked up the show, saw pictures, and even a preview. It didn’t look anything like the gif, but I still wanted to watch this anime because it sounded very interesting. After asking one of my friends about it and continuing to contemplate it, I gave it a shot. Check out the trailer below: Now I thoroughly enjoyed this anime; Re:zero has everything from fight scenes, to drama to love and even some very tripped out what-just-happened moments. It has yet to be officially announced that there is a season 2, but many fans including myself, are wondering what is next, and why are there so many unanswered questions. For instance there are so many characters who have untold stories or mysteries behind their methods, leaving us wonder what could they be hiding. The season finale had a cliffhanger edge to it as if there should’ve been more – but, I mean, with 25 episodes how much more can you put in one season? So I want to give my reasons why I think we need a season 2. Why Did the Jealous Witch Pick Subaru? Why is He So Valuable? Who is She? So throughout this anime, we see the main character Subaru. He has been cursed with the ability to die and come back to life, but the only true misfortune is when he dies, he remembers everything. No one else shares the memories. He begins life again at the same point of his life originally ended.He soon finds out that he was cursed by the Jealous Witch. Now we do not see the Jealous Witch in this anime except for a few glimpses, such as when Subaru is antagonizing her. But we have to ask, why did she pick Subaru? We hear multiple times during the last few episodes from Betelgeuse that Subaru might be Archbishop of Pride and that’s why he has the Witch’s love on him. Another reason we hear is because he is the only one who is able to get close enough to get Emilia to let her guard down. We learn that the Jealous witch wants to takeover Emilia’s body, but she is having a hard time doing that. But from all this, still what is the reason she cursed Subaru? Was she watching him in the other world? Subaru himself has said it numerous times, he is nothing special, he is small, weak, and fragile, and he always runs away. But there is one thing that Subaru has, and that’s the courage to never give up on anyone. We’ve seen it countless times that he never gives up even when everyone else does or maybe that is also his pride. Hopefully, in season 2 we get to see why the Jealous Witch cursed Subaru, and why she adores him or is fascinated by him. Maybe when the Jealous Witch takes over Emilia she will try to make Subaru her king, or take his spirit and put it in the dragon. We will get to the dragon in a few. What is Next for Rem? and Her and Ram’s relationship with Roswaal? Rem is one of the best characters in this anime in my opinion, and I have been hearing a lot of people agree with that statement. She is very sweet, and kind, and she is extremely powerful. But at the end of this anime we see she kind of shifts from the maid of the mansion to – if I have nothing else to fight for I will fight for Subaru. She has fallen in love with him only to be rejected in the worst way, but she still cannot deny her love for him. I wonder what next season will hold for her and her sister Ram. Rem has shown her strength in different episodes, while Ram has also shown her strength, but see she is not as nearly as powerful as her sister. Hopefully next season we see Rem get to use her powers again, but moreso controlling them, and even though Subaru rejected her, maybe we will see Rem have another love interest (or Subaru will see how much she really does care for him). Let’s examine the relationship Rem and Ram have with Roswaal L. Mathers. All we really know about Roswaal is everyone is staying inside of his Mansion. He dresses very interesting, almost like a clown, but very elegant at the same time. He also uses magic. We also know he is cosigning Emilia for seat at the throne, but it almost seems like he has another motive when him and Ram were talking in one episode. Ram was telling Roswaal how she will always serve him, since he saved her and Rem from the witch’s cult the night their village was attacked. Roswaal also healed Ram’s broken horn. Roswaal also mentions he has plans to destroy the dragon. So we have to wonder what was he doing when saving Rem and Ram, and why does he want to destroy the dragon? I have a small theory that he was in the witch’s cult and denounced it. I believe he was ordered to kill Rem and Ram but refused to. Who is, or What is the Dragon? and Why does Everyone Want to Kill It? In various episodes, we hear different characters mention this dragon, but what or who exactly is the dragon? We hear a story from villagers that the Dragon trapped the Jealous Witch and now she cannot do anything. that’s why she has to go into someone’s body who is capable for harnessing her powers. But we also see that Roswaal wants to kill the Dragon. So maybe Roswaal is hoping that the Jealous Witch takes over Emilia’s body, so both of them can kill the Dragon together, hence that’s why he is cosigning with Emilia. We have to wonder why is the Dragon so special, and how does it have that much power to be able to trap the witch? Hopefully season 2 shows the story of the dragon. I also feel that the Dragon is a metaphor for two things: in this Kingdom of Lugnica where there are magical creatures, I feel the Dragon can either transform into a human, or is a magical creature that rules over the kingdom, coming out only when needed. Where did Elsa go? and Why was She So Important to Introduce First? When this series first begins we are introduced to Subaru, Felt, Emilia, and also Elsa Granhiert. All of these characters were seen throughout the series except Elsa. She was only in the beginning. From what we know, Elsa is a trained assassin, more so a badass with some dope swordsmen skills. She is one of the witch’s special assassins as she has come for the crest that Felt stole in the beginning. Now Elsa slices everyone, specifically slices their guts open – a specialty of hers with the way her swords have been wielded. But why did we not see her anymore in the series? I expected to see her during the battle or with the witch’s cult, but she did not show her face anymore. We also see that she has a supposed power of being happy to smell someone’s fear, so maybe that comes into play later on in why she is so skilled. Like this woman is so dope, I wish we could’ve seen more of her. I feel the witch has a special plan for her and Subaru, in terms of Elsa is going to extract something or some kind of information from him. What did Puck Transform Into? and What’s Her Relationship to Emilia? Puck is possibly one of the strongest characters in this show, what we know right out the gate is that Puck is a spirit, and lives in Emilia’s gem. But Puck’s power is limited to when the sun goes down. But quite a few times we hear Puck call Emilia her daughter, which may distinguish why Puck is always so protective of her. Is Puck Emilia’s mother, or is Puck a guardian that took her in. Now in episodes 15, 16, and I believe 17, we see the extent of Puck’s power, and I just have to say the end of episode 15 gave me the chills. It reminded me of an old Shaw brothers or samurai move, mixed with kind of a Tanrantino feel. Now we didn’t quite see what Puck transformed into, but it was some kind of large beast that has the ability to destroy the world. This only comes out after Emilia has supposedly died, which shows the magnitude of Pucks power especially if anyone hurt Emilia. Hopefully they can show how Puck got her powers, and what she was before turning into the spirit. I believe she died maybe helping the dragon to protect her daughter and asked the dragon to turn her into a spirit. Or if that’s not the case Puck asked Emilia to turn her into a spirit because she could no longer keep going on with life, maybe she used the rest of her magic to be able to stay with Emilia. What is in Store for Emilia? and Is She Prepared to take the Throne? Emilia is the female protagonist in this series. She is half elf which gives her an elf-ian look, but also why the town is afraid of her. She resembles the Jealous Witch, which is in part why the Jealous witch wants to possess her body. Emilia is very powerful, but also has a very kind and sweet heart, wanting to change the Kingdom and bring peace and prosperity. But as we see in a few episodes there are other women battling for the throne of the Kingdom – the likes of Priscilla, Crusch, Anastasia, and also Felt. All of these women have very strong personalities, but Emilia seems the most kindhearted, until she has to prepare for war. I think she is the best choice for the throne, but I believe Crusch, Priscilla and Felt might be her competition, especially if it comes down to dealing with Subaru. After fighting this battle with Subaru, and defeating the Witch’s Cult, I feel that Emilia, and Subaru will become closer, but I believe he will teach her the ways of each of the other women who she is in competition with, since he was able to speak to each of them one on one. I also feel that Emilia is a little naïve and nonchalant because her main goal is to become queen, but it also seems she needs a little more attitude to show her stance in taking the throne. Even though out of all the other queens, Emilia is probably the most powerful with her magic, and then also with the help of Puck, she knows if she uses any of that it could scare away votes. I think she’ll learn to win over the villagers, or the villagers will see that she is the only one they can truly trust in times of need. I did not touch on Felt, but I would love to know her back story, and how Reinhard knew she was royalty. Felt being in this competition for the throne is very interesting, and I hope in season 2 they show a little of her back story. Overall I really enjoyed Re:zero. Hopefully we get a season 2. Some parts of this anime were slow, but once it really got into the story, and showing Subaru and the other characters, the episodes were amazing. These are just some of the reasons why I think we need a season 2. If you have any other reasons, don’t be afraid to comment below. And if you haven’t already checked out this anime yet, I suggest you do that.

Caffeine during pregnancy is something all pregnant moms-to-be need to know about. When you’ve been up to go to the bathroom five times at night, a hot cup of joe in the morning sounds like just the thing. But can you drink coffee while pregnant? How much is too much? We’ve got all the coffee pregnancy facts you need below. Why Is Coffee and Pregnancy an Issue? Coffee contains caffeine, a powerful stimulant. That’s why we love it because it makes us feel like we have more energy and blocks the chemicals in our brain that makes us feel sleepy. During pregnancy, the body is slower at processing caffeine, which means it hangs around for longer. This can cause problems for both mom and baby. Caffeine is a diuretic, which means it makes you pee more than usual. This is a contributing factor towards feeling dehydrated, which is bad news during pregnancy when you need more water than ever. Dehydration also leads to dry and dull skin, irritability, and can affect the immune system. Although the stimulating effect of caffeine is why we love our coffee, this is also bad news during pregnancy. Caffeine can raise blood pressure. Very high blood pressure can lead to conditions like pre-eclampsia. Caffeine also makes the heart rate, which puts press stress on you and your unborn baby. Caffeine Pregnancy Facts - Caffeine can pass through the placenta to your baby. - Your baby can’t withstand the same amounts of caffeine as you can. - Caffeine may disrupt your and baby’s sleep patterns. - Caffeine is in more food and drinks than coffee. - Caffeine in pregnancy may cause premature labor. - Caffeine may increase the risk of a miscarriage. So, Can I Drink Coffee While Pregnant? Coffee during pregnancy can cause problems, but only over certain amounts. A range of studies come to differing conclusions. Some say less than 150mg caffeine a day is fine; others say 200mg or less. When working out how much caffeine your taking in every day, remember that caffeine is in more than just coffee- see our helpful list below. How Much Caffeine When Pregnant Is Safe? Understanding how much caffeine a pregnant woman can have is about looking at the most recent studies we have on the subject. A British study concluded that over 200mg of coffee could seriously increase the risk of fetal growth restriction. The World Health Organization recommends that women who take in more than 300mg a day should lower this during pregnancy, and it’s a good idea to do this if trying for a baby too. Enjoying a coffee while pregnant is still possible. The problems with pregnancy and caffeine tend to occur when the regular daily intake is consistently high. So, how much caffeine can a pregnant woman have? The best recommendation is no more than 200mg daily, and the less, the better. Remember that caffeine comes from more than just coffee and can also be found in: - Energy drinks (avoid these when pregnant) - Some candy - Certain medications Here are some approximate caffeine amounts for favorite drinks, courtesy of the Mayo Clinic: 8 oz brewed coffee: up to 165mg caffeine Espresso: up to 47mg 8oz instant coffee: 63mg 8oz latte or mocha: up to 126mg 8oz black tea: up to 48mg 8oz green tea: up to 29mg 8oz cola: up to 46mg Can pregnant women drink coffee? Sure, but from the caffeine amounts shown above, only around one cup a day. We know that’s tough, so here are some alternatives to help you get your hot drink fix: - Decaf Coffee- still has caffeine in but only around 5mg per 8oz - Tea- a standard black tea has about a quarter the caffeine of coffee - Decaf Tea - Redbush Tea, also called Rooibos Tea- a South African herbal drink, which may help with nausea and doesn’t contain caffeine; however, speak to a doctor before taking any herbal drinks or supplements. - Peppermint Tea – also be good for nausea - Ginger Tea- good for nausea and has a comforting, warming effect Don’t fall into the trap of thinking all herbal teas are great. For example, anything with raspberry in it should be avoided as a raspberry leaf can cause uterine contractions. It’s so powerful that your doctor may recommend this at the very end of your pregnancy to help things along. Aloe vera can also have this effect, which is why it’s crucial to talk to a doctor before taking any herbal remedies or teas while pregnant. Is It Safe to Quit Caffeine? The best option for both mom and baby is to cut out as much caffeine as possible. But is it safe to go cold turkey? Potential side effects of quitting caffeine include: - Headache due to increased blood flow - Lack of focus - Low mood As a pregnant mom-to-be, you might have some of these symptoms anyway- particularly the tiredness! However, to avoid these, simply cut down your caffeine intake before quitting. Go from a large coffee to a small, and then if you want to quit completely, the effects will be much less. These effects all pass after a few days. Drinking coffee when pregnant is okay in moderation, although experts can’t agree how much is too much. If you’re worried, switch to decaf or a low caffeine option. Whatever you choose to do, make sure you’re drinking plenty of water and eating healthily. Takeaway: Can you drink coffee when pregnant? Drinking too much coffee while pregnant can mean you’re taking in high amounts of caffeine. High amounts of caffeine during pregnancy can cause problems for both mother and baby.

What Is Pedophilia? Answers to common questions about pedophiles and pedophilia. What would you want people to know about the stereotypes about pedophiles? "People do not choose to be attracted to children or adults any more than they choose to be attracted to males or females," Blanchard says. "If there is any choice in the situation, it is in how pedophiles manage their lives once they become fully aware of the direction of their sexual interests and the societal prohibitions against expressing them." How do pedophiles typically deal with those feelings? Some pedophiles embrace and try to justify their sexual orientation. Others recognize that the idea of approaching a child in real life is morally wrong; they can be frustrated, isolated, lonely, depressed, and anxious, Blanchard says. "It seems conceivable that the stress of living with pedophilic disorder may lead to various secondary psychological problems," Blanchard says. "There are, however, some resilient individuals who manage to lead productive and successful lives, even though their sexuality remains a source of frustration." If a man or woman has feelings that may be within the range of pedophilia -- even if they've never acted upon those feelings -- what should they do? Get help. "People who are troubled by their sexual attraction to children should seek professional help rather than try to deal with this problem on their own," Blanchard says. He suggests starting with a family practitioner, although it may take several rounds of referrals. Or search for a sex therapist in your city. Most areas of North America have mandatory reporting laws that override patient confidentiality. "These require the clinician to report instances of child sexual abuse (or probable imminent abuse) to designated authorities," Blanchard says.

Yesterday I reported that Democratic state representative Thomas Caltagirone had sent a note to his fellow Democrats announcing his intention to support current Republican Speaker of the House John Perzel over the probably Democratic speaker Bill DeWeese. I suggested there were likely shenanigans involved. VoicePA has put together a money trail. I haven't gone through and verified their research but it looks believable to me. Want to know why people are cynical about government? This could be exhibit B, right after the payraise exhibit A. DeWeese doesn't inspire a lot of confidence in me either, but Perzel is no reformer either. What I want to know is why Caltagirone would announce his intentions in public. Why also wouldn't he suggest a Democratic alternative? It's all fishy to me and what VoicePA has come up with makes sense. Update: The Inky has set up a blog, run by state govt reporter Mario Cattabiani, to report on the situation. See http://pagavel.blogspot.com/index.html Sunday, December 31, 2006 Yesterday I reported that Democratic state representative Thomas Caltagirone had sent a note to his fellow Democrats announcing his intention to support current Republican Speaker of the House John Perzel over the probably Democratic speaker Bill DeWeese. I suggested there were likely shenanigans involved. VoicePA has put together a money trail. I haven't gone through and verified their research but it looks believable to me. Saturday, December 30, 2006 Both PoliticsPA and the Inky are reporting that Reading's Democratic Rep. Tom Caltagirone has notified his colleagues that he intends to vote for GOP John Perzel to retain his Speaker of the House position even though there is now a Democratic majority in the House. Stay tuned. I suspect shenanigans. Sorting through the "to be blogged about" pile, I've discarded many items whose timeliness has passed. One did catch my eye. It is customary this time of year to offer toasts and remembrances and no doubt many a glass will be raised for our soldiers and veterans. A passage from an article in the Dec. 11 Wall Street Journal really struck me, probably because my father spent most of his 20 years in the army as a sergeant (primarily drill and platoon) and one sibling served as a supply sergeant before going to college and emerging as an officer (much to my father's great pride and chagrin). As we celebrate the victories and mourn the losses of 2006, let us remember the sergeants. “Escalating Tab: Despite Its $168 Billion Budget, The Army Faces a Cash Crunch, by Greg Jaffe, WSJ Dec. 11, continuation on p. A4 One of the most pressing personnel problems is the lack of sergeants, the enlisted leaders who do most of the day-to-day supervising of the rank-and-file soldiers. At Fort Hood, Texas, the Third Armored Cavalry Regiment, which returned from Iraq in March, has about 75% of the soldiers it needs to fill its ranks, but only about half of its sergeants. The 5,000-soldier unit likely will go back to Iraq in the fall of next year, and leaders in the regiment say they will get more sergeants before they deploy, but not as many as they would like. “The sergeant is the one that the soldiers take after,” says First Sgt. James Adcock, who oversees about 30 of the unit’s soldiers. He can make or break how effective the privates are.” Friday, December 29, 2006 I finally finished reading this week's Wall Street Journal and found a few interesting Pennsylvania-related items: Mullins, Brody, "Strings Attached: As Earmarked Funding Swells, Some Recipients Don't Want it," Dec. 26, p. A1+. This is from p. A10: Leaders in both parties use earmarks to reward lawmakers. For example, Pennsylvania Democratic Rep. John Murtha, who will be chairman of the defense spending panel, won't allow members to add earmarks to the defense-spending bill unless they agree to support it, according to aides on the appropriations committee. This year's defense bill, which included nearly 3,000 earmarks took a mere 20 minutes to pass the House in October. Megan Grote, a spokeswoman for Mr. Murtha, says that "members of Congress who appreciate the synergy between local communities and the [Department of Defense] are much more likely to support the bill, and that is the essential goal -- to get members to support the defense bill." According to the article about 4% of the nation's budget, about 40.8 billion dollars, goes to earmarks. In the Saturday/Sunday, December 23-24 issue, a front page article, "By the Bedside: In Nursing Homes, A Drug Middleman Finds Big Profits," by Sarah Lueck, a Pennsylvania company gets a mention on the p. A7 continuation: Omnicare isn't the only company in the field receiving rebates. AmerisourceBergen Corp. of Chesterbrook, Pa, which has a subsidiary supplying drugs to nursing homes, also gets them. "It's part of how we get paid," says AmerisourceBergen spokesman Michael N. Kilpatrick, adding that the rebates are for medically beneficial drugs. Since 1994 Omnicare has hired he College of Pharmacy at the University of the Sciences in Philadelphia to compile an annual book -- now running to about 800 pages -- that lays out the best drugs to use in the elderly based on research. The company says the book is the basis for its drug recommendations. "This book is scrutinized by people who have no vested interest in helping Omnicare financially," says Catherine Dragon, driectory of the guidelines project at the university, describing the editorial process. I found the entire article a little alarming. In the interest of full disclosure let me mention that the investment club I belong to owns Omnicare stock. This is the last part of my review of Barack Obama's Audacity of Hope. Chapter Seven: Race As the only American senator with known African ancestry, Obama is in a unique position to discuss race. He talks, for example, about the importance of the support he received from wealthy African Americans early in his political career and senatorial campaign, and how, in past years, there simply wouldn’t have been that many people of color with that kind of money. But, even so, the gaps in income, education and net worth that exist today between racial and ethnic groups defy the notion that we have or are becoming a racially blind society. To be sure, he talks about individual responsibility in regards to education and family stability, but contrasts these issues with ways that public policy could help reduce the income gaps among differing groups of people. One example he gives is the possibility of scholarships for minority students in math and science graduate programs where the number of African American and Latino students is comparatively miniscule. Consider this excerpt from p. 259: What would that be worth to all of us – an American in which crime has fallen, more children are cared for, cities are reborn, and the biases, fear, and discord that black poverty feeds are slowly drained away? Would it be worth what we’ve spent in the past year in Iraq? Would it be worth relinquishing demands for estate tax repeal? It’s hard to quantify the benefits of such changes – precisely because the benefits would be immeasurable. He also talks about the hard working parents trying to keep their kids out of trouble and teach them good values and a work ethic. He mentions a man in Chicago who owns a number of businesses and hires young men off the street to teach them job skills. His turnover is high but those who stay with him for any length of time start talking about college or trade school. In this chapter he also touches on illegal immigration. On pages 265 and 266 he recounts a conversation he had with a Republican senator on an immigration bill. I wish he had named names because the senator in question says “These Mexicans are just willing to work harder than Americans do.” Chapter Eight: The World Beyond Our Borders This is the foreign policy chapter and Obama discusses in detail the years of his childhood spent in Indonesia with his mother and stepfather. Again, he gives a brief overview of American history in this area. He discusses in depth his visits to Iraq and the former Soviet Union. There are a number of pithy statements in this chapter but none that I thought were representative of the entire thought pattern. It is interesting to read and difficult to summarize or excerpt from. Chapter Nine: Family The family chapter is perhaps the most personal chapter in the book. He recounts meeting his wife and their courtship. He expands this to discuss the American family in general. Like many people today he was raised by a single parent and he talks about the issues involved in his childhood and in single parent families more broadly. He touches on marriage and child care. It is almost a requirement for politicians to write or talk about how wonderful their spouses are and Obama is no exception. His wife is lawyer and the two of them have the money to afford good reliable child care. In addition his mother-in-law lives nearby. He writes of knowing how fortunate they are to have family close at hand and the means to fill in the gaps where needed, as well as some flexibility in work hours, and of how many American do not have these luxuries. Again he brings personal responsibility into the discussion but also some ideas on ways that public policy could ease the day to day existence of many people. Obama recounts the two times he attended the Democratic National Convention, one with more fanfare and success than the other. He ends the book by going back to a theme in the prologue, that of value of public service. While the book is primarily a personal narrative he does include some facts and other information that should be cited. In lieu of a standard bibliography or list of footnotes, source material is available on a website for the book, www.audacityofhope.com. Sources are primarily reports, magazine, and newspaper articles; many if not most are from within the past few years. It is difficult to have too many sources but the list Obama (or, according to the acknowledgements, someone else) has put together is more than adequate to document what he says. As I said at the beginning of this review, I enjoyed this book immensely. He has a gift with words and writes beautifully, almost lyrically in places. Yet he writes with substance and I often had to stop and think about what he had said. He has that rare knack to talk about something significant and sometimes painful without being overblown or melodramatic about it. Some of his discussions on race, of people throwing their keys at him outside restaurants, assuming he is a valet, are loaded with emotion but presented in passing. Someone else describing an upbringing similar to his could easily do so in the harsh and jagged tones of deprivation and victimization. Obama talks of it in simple nonjudgmental terms of acceptance. I found it impossible to read the book and not maintain or increase my opinion of him. I did not walk away with a clear understanding of the specific policy measures he would like to see put into place, but I do think I have a better idea of what general goals he has for the country, and I like them. Thursday, December 28, 2006 I had been, by and large, blissfully ignoring the Philadelphia mayor's race, but it landed in my inbox yesterday so I should probably start paying attention. In one of those serendipitous finds, while perusing the magazine rack while in the checkout line of the grocery store last night, I noticed that the January issue of Philadelphia Magazine has a nice long article on declared candidate and former city councilman Michael Nutter. When fate thumps you it's a good idea to take the hint so I bought the magazine and read the article. It's well done and provides a political history of Nutter and how he came to be where he is, complete with reputation as a reform candidate. For local netroots fans, city activist Hannah Miller, who served as state representative-elect Rick Taylor's campaign manager, is quoted in a couple of places. The article, "Michael Nutter's Dilemma: Is this man too much of a reformer to be mayor? Or so hungry to be mayor that he can't be a real reformer?," by Jason Fagone, is available on the magazine's website: http://www.phillymag.com/articles/michael_nutters_dilemma/, at least for now, so click quickly. Picking up where the previous post left off, here are my thoughts on chapters 3-6 of Barack Obama's Audacity of Hope. Chapter Three: Our Constitution In this chapter he discusses the senate and the separation of powers. He also goes into detail on laws, and the devil being in the details. Those wanting a brief description of partisanship in relation to judicial nominees and the “nuclear option” regarding filibusters will find this chapter particularly interesting. As a former professor of constitutional law his lengthy and heartfelt review of the Constitution, its history and the development of current interpretation of it. Here are two comments, the first from p.86 And yet for all our disagreements we would be hard pressed to find a conservative or liberal in America today, whether Republican or Democrat, academic or layman, who doesn’t subscribe to the basic set of individual liberties identified by the Founders and enshrined in our Constitution and our common law: the right to speak our minds; the right to worship how and if we wish; the right to peaceably assemble to petition our government; the right to own, buy and sell property and not have it taken without fair compensation; the right to be free from unreasonable searches and seizures; the right not to be detained by the state without due process; the right to a fair and speedy trial; and the right to make our own determinations, with minimal restriction regarding family life and the way we raise our children. And this from p. 96 on slavery: How can I, an American with the blood of Africa coursing through my veins, chose sides in such a dispute? I can’t. I love America too much, am too invested in what this country has become, too committed to its institutions, its beauty, and even its ugliness, to focus entirely on the circumstances of its birth. But neither can I brush aside the magnitude of the injustice done, or erase the ghosts of generations past, or ignore the open wound, the aching spirit, that ails this country still. Throughout the chapter, but especially at the beginning (the third page in) and ending he mentions Sen. Robert Byrd, who wrote a multi-volume history of the senate. I won’t give it away, but Byrd’s discussion of one of his few regrets in life is one that must have touched them both. Chapter Four: Politics This is my favorite chapter in the book. It is a bluntly honest description of fundraising and campaigning and how those things change people, specifically candidates and elected officials. If you haven’t ever seen the inside of a political race, this will provide a good introduction. It was so well-constructed that I found impossible to pull out any one paragraph or group of sentences that were any better than the others or able to stand on their own without including more of an excerpt than I thought people would want to read. Just go through the whole thing; it’s only 35 pages. Chapter Five: Opportunity Obama opens and closes this chapter with stories of what happens when you do and don’t fly on private jets. This comparison was my favorite anecdote (or connected series of anecdotes) in the entire book. I won’t spoil it for you by including any of those stories here. Again, read it yourself. In between he gives a brief history of the role of government in business, education, and energy. Doing so in such a short space means it is only the most cursory of overviews, to provide the structure needed in setting the stage for what is happening today. Later he takes on social security and health care, acknowledging the complexity of these issues and not pretending to come up with quick and easy solutions. Here is a paragraph from p. 187 Americans are willing to compete with the world. We work harder than the people of any other wealthy nation. We are willing to tolerate more economic instability and are willing to take more personal risks to get ahead. But we can only compete if our government makes the investments that give us a fighting chance – and if we know that our families have some net beneath which they cannot fall. He wraps up the chapter with a story about meeting Warren Buffet and talking with him about tax policy. They agreed on the need for the wealthy to pay more, as noted on p. 193: And perhaps I possess a certain Midwestern sensibility that I inherited from my mother and her parents, a sensibility that Warren Buffet seems to share: that at a certain point one has enough, that you can derive as much pleasure from a Picasso hanging in a museum as from one that’s hanging in your den, that you can get an awfully good meal in a restaurant for less than twenty dollars, and that once your drapes costs more than the average American’s yearly salary, then you can afford to pay a bit more in taxes. Chapter Six: Faith It has been something of a fad for some Democrats to wear their religious beliefs on their sleeve. Obama doesn’t do that. Instead he gives the development of his own faith and how it has informed his politics. I like this statement as a good summation of what he has to say, from p. 221: In judging the persuasiveness of various moral claims, we should be on the lookout for inconsistency in how such claims are applied: As a general rule, I am more pronte to listen to those who are as outraged by homelessness as they are by the indecency of music videos. And we need to recognize that sometimes our arguments are less about what is right than bout who makes the final determination – whether we need the coercive arm of the state to enforce our values, or whether the subject is one best left to individual conscience and evolving norms. He does argue in favor of inviting people of faith into the Democratic Party, and not simply letting the conservative Republicans lay sole claim to votes who profess religious beliefs. Wednesday, December 27, 2006 Obama, Barack. The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream. NY: Crown Publishers, 2006. 375 pp. I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Obama writes very well. No co-author is listed anywhere and he writes much as he speaks so I assume these are all his words. It took me longer than I expected to finish the book. The writing is a pleasure to read so it wasn’t a matter of having to slog through. Quite the contrary, much of what I read was sufficiently engaging and thought-provoking that I would have to stop and savor or absorb what he says. There are nine chapters, plus a prologue and an epilogue (also acknowledgements and an index). As any good prologue does, this one introduces the book, why he is writing it, and so on. He provides a very succinct overview of his political philosophy on pages 1 and 2, as a response to those who ask why he, or anyone, would want to get involved in anything as nasty as politics. He says: “In response, I would usually smile and nod and say that I understood the skepticism, but that there was – and always had been – another tradition to politics, a tradition that stretched from the days of the country’s founding to the glory of the civil rights movement, a tradition based on the simple idea that we have a stake in one another, and that what binds us together is greater than what drives us apart, and that if enough people believe in the truth of that proposition and act on it, then we might not solve very problem, but we can get something meaningful done.” He lays out his overarching policy statements in a very simple way. Each of these items opens up a huge can of worms but finding common ground to start with is the best beginning and we can wrestle with such things as merit pay for teachers versus seniority and health care plans a few steps down the road. But this is a good start: If anything, what struck me was just how modest people’s hopes were, and how much of what they believed seemed to hold constant across race, region, religion, and class. Most of them thought that anybody willing to work should be able to find a job that paid a living wage. They figured that people shouldn’t have to file for bankruptcy because they got sick. They believed that every child should have a genuinely good education – that it shouldn’t just be a bunch of talk – and that those same children should be able to go to college even if their parents weren’t rich. They wanted to be safe, from criminals and terrorists; they wanted clean air, clean water, and time with their kids. And when the got old, they wanted to be able to retire with some dignity and respect. Okay, I can sign on to all of those things. He isn’t calling for free tuition at Harvard, just the ability to go to college, not free health care, just options other than bankruptcy. One of the things I like best about this book is his repeated discussion of finding common values and working from those. His book is not, as many political works are, divisive or aimed to incite one particular base (or, if it is, I’m part of that base and don’t see it). He addresses some of that in this passage from p. 7: ”You don’t need a poll to know that the vast majority of Americans – Republican, Democrat, and independent – are weary of the dead zone that politics has become, in which narrow interests vie for advantage and ideological minorities seek to impose their own versions of absolute truth. Whether we’re from red states or blue states, we feel in our gut the lack of honesty, rigor, and common sense in our policy debates, and dislike what appears to be a continuous menu of false or cramped choices.” It is almost impossible to separate our beliefs from our life experiences and Obama acknowledges that, by calling himself a prisoner of his own biography (p.10). Chapter One: Republicans and Democrats The first chapter gives an overview of partisanship and a general political history of the country, especially in his lifetime and devoting a lot of space to the Reagan and Clinton years. He talks especially about the increase of incivility and partisanship. In such a small number of pages there is only so much he can cover and his goal is not to provide a complete history, but to provide a structure to his discussion, mixed in with his own views and philosophy. For example, this section from p. 22 struck me because, I too, become weary of pronouncements that we live in the worst of times: ”When Democrats run up to me at events and insist that we live in the worse of political times, that a creeping fascism is closing its grip around our throats, I may mention the internment of Japanese Americans under FDR, the Alien and Sedition Acts under John Adams, or a hundred years of lynching under several dozen administrations as having been possibly worse, and suggest we all take a deep breath. When people at dinner parties ask me how I can possibly operate in the current political environment, with all the negative campaigning and personal attacks, I may mention Nelson Mandela, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, or some guy in a Chinese or Egyptian prison somewhere. In truth, being called names is not such a bad deal.” He declines to return partisanship for partisanship, spelled out on p. 41-42. ”There are out there, I think to myself, those ordinary citizens who have grown up in the midst of all the political and cultural battles, but who have found a way – in their own lives at least – to make peace with their neighbors, and themselves.” He provides a very thought-provoking list of examples that I would encourage you to read. Chapter Two: Values On page 45 he has an excellent description of the president. Having met George W. Bush I would agree with his observations. Again, a theme in this chapter is that the dividing lines in American society are products of political parties and the media more than easily found lines in residential and business communities. He talks about the things we as citizens of this county hold dear, regardless of our political, religious, sexual, or other orientation. He quotes from the Declaration of Independence and talks about how American values have become clearer to him for having lived and visited with family in Indonesia and Kenya. As one example of starting from common values when working on contentious policy he discusses a bill he introduced into the state legislature to require the videotaping of interrogations and confessionals in capital cases. In sitting down with all the parties involved, police, prosecutors, public defenders, death penalty opponents, and others, they started with the view that no innocent person should end up on death row. All were agreed on that, and worked their way down into the specifics. In places the bill was modified. Against the odds and predictions, it passed. From here he ventures into dangerous waters. I agree with him on what he said but understand why it gets him into trouble. He says that Democrats should not be afraid to discuss social values and preferences, even when we do not think these values should be written into law. The examples he uses are advertisements on television during sports events that families might watch together and the mores of television characters, whether real or imagined. He is not suggesting that we legislate what is shown but that people show better judgment. As a contrast he points out the conservative blind spot when it comes to executive pay. He ends the chapter with a discussion of values on the campaign trail and some remembrances of lessons learned from his mother and grandparents and how some of his values evolved as he matured. He ends with some very good points (p. 68): When I was a community organizer, way back in the eighties, I would often challenge neighborhood leaders by asking them where they put their time, energy, and money. Those are the true tests of what we value, I’d tell them, regardless of what we like to tell ourselves. If we aren’t willing to pay a price for our values, if we aren’t willing to make some sacrifices in order to realize them, then we should ask ourselves whether we truly believe in them at all. Last year over the holidays I read Rick Santorum's book. This year I decided to get a head start on the 2008 presidential race by reading books by some of the hopefuls. This post will serve as an aggregation of relevant postings over the next few weeks or later as more material become available and as more people announce their intentions. Barack Obama. The Audacity of Hope. Part I (prologue through chapter 2) Part II (chapters 3 through 6) Part III (chapter 7 through the epilogue) Tuesday, December 26, 2006 One of the fun things about coming home after being away a few days is going through several newspapers at once. I haven't gotten completely caught up with the Inky yet, but a story in Saturday's paper (For 2 new lawmakers, giving back pay raises is hard to do," by Mari A. Schaefer) got my attention. I tried to find a good holiday-related title for this blog post, something about the Grinch or no good deed goes unpunished, but nothing really seemed to fit. In any event, two newly elected state representatives, Bryan Lentz (D-161) and Tom Murt (R-152) don't want their salaries to reflect this year's cost of living increase. They want their salary to be what it was when they ran for office. Apparently there is no way to do that. They can contribute the amount of the increase to charity, but they will still be taxed on the full amount. Superior Court Judge Joan Orie Melvin ran into the same problem in October and has been refusing to accept her paychecks, sending them back to the state until the issue can be resolved. Saturday, December 23, 2006 As might be expected not much happened in the state house and senate this week. In fact the only action reported was something that happened in the house in July (sometimes, for some reason, it takes months for these things to show up in the daily emails). HB 471 Prior Printer's Nos. 510, 2280, 4761, 4885, 4923. Printer's No. 4947. An Act amending the act of April 9, 1929 (P.L.177, No.175), known as The Administrative Code of 1929, providing for transfers of appropriations and for notice of transfers and loans between funds; extending the time period covered by an application considered for the Merchant Marine World War II Veterans Bonus and the expiration of the Merchant Marine World War II Veterans Bonus Act; establishing the Cardiovascular Disease Advisory Committee and a Statewide stroke database; providing for biennial renewal of certain licenses for volunteer health services; and making inconsistent repeals relating to the Merchant Marine World War II Veterans Bonus Act. The governor vetoed it in late November. No idea why reporting this was so delayed. I'm taking a few days off. Back the 26th or 27th. Friday, December 22, 2006 The Inky's wonderful blog on the count and recount in the Chester County house race reports yesterday that Democrat Barbara McIlvaine Smith is the new representative from the 156th district. That puts the Democrats in the majority (just barely). Kudos to the Inquirer for running the temporary blog, http://chescocount.blogspot.com/. Thursday, December 21, 2006 These are rough notes from Rep-elect Joe Sestak's (D-07) appearance on "This Week with George Stephanopoulos" on Dec. 17, 2006. It was the second segment of the show, with Sestak and Ret. Army Gen. Jack Keane. At one point it was available online at http://abcnews.go.com/ThisWeek/. As always my apologies for any errors or misinterpretations. GS: plan for more troops JK: security plan is part of the comprehensive situation. In terms of the strategy itself, theessence of it is the security of the people in Baghdad. Never taken this on before. Put in a 24/7 force and do not go back to bases at night. GS: how many new troops and how long will they stay JK: additional 4 or 5 brigades, 25K people, in Al Ambar, mission to keep insurgents off base in Baghdad, 2 marine regiments, another 10K, go into fall of year. Then move focus to Al Ambar. Another 6 to 7 months GS: what’s wrong with this strategy JS: We’re on the road to nowhere. 1) We had troops in Al Ambar, no effect, in fact violence increased. 2) letting Iraqis have more political & military dependence on us 3) hurting here at home, army strained. Not a military issue but a political issue. Need a date certain [for withdrawal]. GS: if we give date certain will there be an increase in violence JS: without a doubt. No perfect strategy. They don’t have to take action because we’re there doing it. What’s the overall strategic issue for America? We need to look at North Korea, Afghanistan. We need to redeploy. Leave some special forces there. GS: previously the joint chiefs agreed with some of JS’s points JK: His argument is choice, can we do something in the intervening year or just cut our losses. What we didn’t do militarily in the past is see this as a security mission. There is a value in seeing this as a regional issue and want regional powers involved. Use economic incentives. GS: Why are you convinced it can’t work? JS: We‘re imposing what we want on the county; polls show they don’t want that. Another illusive ever changing goal. Not a military solution. Real loss not Iraq but loss in overall world security. Mentions Afghanistan again. Taliban back in southern provinces. We aren’t able to pay attention GS: Gen, Sen Reid said Dems support an additional few months JK: impossible. Need to clear insurgents and death squads and then bring in protection forces and don’t have them go back to bases and then bring in economic incentives. Problem in past never put secure forces into areas. Iraqi forces not capable yet. GS: Doesn’t that mean when we leave the insurgents come back JK: The people will isolate insurgents and they don’t come back. Over relied on political solutions throughout, never saw this as a military problem GS: Will the president accept this? JK: doesn’t know. Wednesday, December 20, 2006 This week I received three letters of thanks from three congressional representatives (or representatives elect), Patrick Murphy (D-08), Allyson Schwartz (D-13), and Joe Sestak (D-07). One was dated November but it was new to me. The three candidates have either an exact or slightly alerted text of the letter on their websites so link away if you want to read what I'm writing about. I looked at them from four viewpoints: writing, unique characteristics, typography / design, and fundraising. Looking at the words used and how the letters were structured you do see three different styles. Schwartz was running for second term in office so hers was a bit different. Here are the paragraphis I thought were the most well-written from each: "Across the nation this November, we made history. We called for an end to cronyism and crooked politics and demanded real change from our government. Now, with a new Democratic Majority, we can move this country in the right direction – working to ensure affordable healthcare, to put on the path to energy independence and to strengthen and secure our nation." (Schwartz) "Now begins the real journey – not just for me, but for all of us here in the 8th District. We are going to bring back optimism. We are going to bring back hope. And we are going to bring back possibility." (Murphy) "I believe the voters most want a coming together to bring about a better America, a “commonwealth” approach to solving our nation’s challenges of the future. I intend to bring people together – Democrats, Republicans, and Independents – to work hard on the issues that are most important to us all: to raise our children well; to own a home; to provide quality education for our children; to have a comfortable retirement; and to live a healthy life in a safe and prosperous America." (Sestak, with points taken off for overuse of semi-colons) Most tortured paragraph (enough with security already): "I entered this race this past February because I believed our country was headed in the wrong direction, and we needed a new course. Congress seemed to have forgotten that true national security begins at home, in the economic, health, and educational security of our citizens. These securities, along with our defense security, were being eroded by the failures of this Congress to act on the issues most important to Americans, and by the tragic misadventure in Iraq. But I believe that if we properly invest and solve our challenges in these four pillars of security, then we have true national security." (Sestak) Words of Gratitude: Sestak is thankful and indebted and hopes to live up to our expectations. Murphy is thankful, grateful, and promises to make us proud. Schwartz is humbled. She takes much more of a “we worked together” approach, perhaps indicative of her incumbent status, while the other two were challengers who ousted incumbents. Schwartz mentions that she is only the second Democratic woman from Pennsylvania to be elected to a second term and the only woman congressional representative from the state. Murphy mentions his army service in Iraq. Sestak mentions his margin of victory – 56% to 44%. Sestak and Murphy sign their first and last names; Schwartz just signs her first name. Typography / design: This section involves verbal descriptions of graphics. If you find this annoying, skip to the next section. One of these days I’ll figure out how to use the scanner on the new printer or maybe Santa will bring me a digital camera. Years ago I took a graduate seminar in printing; we learned to throw type (being able to read upside down and backwards is very useful in typesetting) and I’ve had an interest in typography ever since. It was interesting to note some of the design qualities in the logos and typefaces used. The gentlemen used blue for their logos, both put their surnames in all caps. Sestak used only a surname; Murphy included his first name, also in capital letters. Both used stars – Murphy had one at the end of the Murphy06 logo; Sestak had three, one above and below the initial S and the other to the left of it. Both had “for Congress” under their name, in italics and mixed case for Sestak, Murphy had all caps. Both used sans serif fonts (read about serifs). I couldn’t quite place them (gotten rusty over the years, time was I could name a type face right off). Sestak looked like Eras Demi ITC but that isn’t quite right. Murphy used a thicker font, something similar to a Gill. Schwartz used red for her logo. She also used a more traditional font. I don’t see anything similar in the Microsoft font list. It looks like an old typewriter font but the serifs on the A are unusual – the serif on top of the capital A is very large and flat. She doesn’t have “for Congress” but instead “U.S. Representative” under her name. Her letter is almost a page and a half; the other two take up the front of the paper only. All three have a union logo at the bottom of the sheet. Schwartz is known for her fundraising abilities and her talents in this area show in her letter. For one thing, she includes a donation card and envelope so you can make a contribution to help with her next election. She even includes this paragraph: "The end-of-year filing deadline will be used as a measure of my strength. A strong fundraising report on December 31st will send a clear signal that I will not be defeated. Please consider a contribution … to kick off my re-election campaign.” To make the point even clearer she says earlier in the letter: "But the truth is victory did not come easily. We helped ensure our success by running a smart campaign and working hard for my re-election right out of the gate. By raising the money early that I needed to run a strong campaign, I sent a message that I was going to have the resources necessary to defend my seat.” Ummm, as I recall, she didn’t have any real opposition to speak of. She is very adept at fundraising though. Neither Murphy nor Sestak make an outright request for money (take note, fellahs, the GOP is already gunning for you) but their letterheads include campaign website URLs and contributions can be made there. They also include postal addresses and phone numbers. Schwartz’s letter does not have those, but they are included on the donation card and self-addressed envelope. The donation card has an “Allyson Schwartz for Congress” logo on it that has many of the characteristics of the other two – blue color, all caps and use of stars. I’m sure a lot of lawyers have gone over all these details to make sure they conform to FEC regulations. Schwartz is a smart cookie. Okay, this is an odd thing to write about, but all three letters arrived within a day or so of each other. As much as I like to tell you my dining room table is clean and uncluttered, it would be a lie. When I was clearing the table off the letters ended up in a pile together and that just naturally suggests comparison. Plus, other than casinos in Philadelphia, there isn’t a lot going on right now. Take note graduate students, there is a thesis somewhere in the study of thank you letters; I'm sure of it. Tuesday, December 19, 2006 We don't have a full list of congressional committee assignments yet but here is what is known so far about area Democrats. Chris Carney (D-10) -- Transportation and Infrastructure Patrick Murphy (D-08) -- Armed Services Allyson Schwartz (D-13) -- Ways and Means Joe Sestak (D-07) -- Armed Services Monday, December 18, 2006 It appears that incumbent Republican Montgomery County Commissioner Tom Ellis plans to run for re-election, even after the release of a poll paid for by incumbent Republican Montgomery County Attorney General Bruce Castor showed him to have some serious negatives in the eyes of the public. Vowing he will not be "bullied," Montgomery County Commissioners Chairman Thomas J. Ellis says he intends to seek re-election next year despite his poor showing in a controversial poll commissioned by fellow Republican, county District Attorney Bruce L. Castor Jr. "It is my belief that polls will say whatever you want them to say, depending on who is paying for it," said Ellis, a lawyer from Cheltenham who will be seeking a second four-year term as commissioner. ("Ellis will pursue re-election despite negative poll," By Margaret Gibbons, Times Herald 12/18/2006) Okay, so let's all keep in mind that, in his view, no polls are reliable. He plans to pay for one himself, which he expects to be favorable but equally unreliable. Good use of money there. Further into the article it says that State Rep. Kate Harper (R-61) may jump into the race. It will be very interesting to see who the Democratic candidates are, other than incumbent Ruth Damsker. We’ve all read about the upcoming sale of PoliticsPA and there are likely to be some changes in the site that I, and many of you, consider as much a part of our mornings as breakfast and the newspaper. To give a look back as well as forward, the site’s anonymous editor, Sy Snyder, took the time to answer a few questions. I’ve mentioned this before but it is relevant to mention again, in the interest of full disclosure, it was at Sy’s suggestion that I started blogging. Our email correspondence has been ongoing for over 4 years and while I have barked at Sy, Sy has always been civil to me. My thanks to Sy for the opportunity to post this interview. I hope my readers enjoy it. [Update: GrassrootsPA also has an interview with Sy Snyder. Read that interview here.] In your time as editor of the site what do you think is the most significant event to have happened in Pennsylvania politics? I think nailing down one single event over the last five years is impossible. But overall, the gains by Democrats in southeast Pennsylvania is dramatically changing the dynamic of how things happen here. Southeast PA used to be a bastion of moderate Republicans, but that’s changing fast. What change would you most like to see in the campaign process, both federal and state? Politics is fun and artful. I think that severe gerrymandering can distort the process and be bad for public policy, but even worse, it ruins the game. The money doesn’t bother me like it does others. If someone like Frank Ryan wants to spend $545,648 to garner 9,026 votes, good for him. What change would you most like to see in voter behavior? I’d like to see more people involved in the process. Young people don’t vote… and they wonder why social security will go broke. How has use of the Internet changed state politics? When we launched PoliticsPA in the fall of 2001, we were the only ones out there. Blogs didn’t exist. RSS didn’t exist. Flash ads were too much to handle. We had a dial-up connection. The technology was so primitive. But now, the news cycle has sped up so fast that newspapers are now forced to have their own blogs just to keep up with us. How does this change state politics? Ask any opposition researcher what their #1 tool for releasing the fruits of their labor. Ron Harper, we love you. On the continuum of enjoying being the all-powerful Oz and being a little lonely back there behind the curtain, where do you fall most days? Wasn’t Oz a little lonely? What are you going to do with yourself now? How long do you plan to continue being involved with PoliticsPA and what will you do afterwards (generally or as far as you can say)? I’m very happy to be working with my new partners Larry Ceisler and David Urban. Over the last five years I have taken PoliticsPA as far as possible without losing my anonymity or sanity. I’ll be involved with PoliticsPA until I’m asked to leave or Patriot News reporter Brett Lieberman finally outs me. I should have been tougher on bad reporters. There is one reporter who could double as Worf at a Star Trek convention who still hasn’t gotten what she deserves. I am tough on people who deserve it. I don’t regret any of the shots I’ve taken with perhaps the exception of the Pennsylvania Historical & Museum Commission when they unsuccessfully attempted to force us to remove an image from our website until State Representative Mike Veon intervened. What do you consider your notable successes, other than just the site itself? It’s rarely noticed, but as a policy, we never attack lower level staffers and operatives. I’m proud to have protected budding talent and helped foster their growth and success, regardless of party. What did you enjoy most / least about running PoliticsPA? I enjoy the private correspondence with my readers. There’s something about the anonymity that really lets people open up, and I’m grateful to have been trusted with some serious secrets. On the other hand, PoliticsPA is updated every business day… that’s required me to anonymously log on to a computer in the early morning hours for nearly 1800 consecutive days, occasionally from very public places and once from Europe. (Cal Ripken’s got nothing on me.) We receive about one thousand press releases per month. It’s an important service to post them all, but it can be tedious. Otherwise, this is an absolute pleasure. You must have a ton of blackmail material squirreled away somewhere. What are you going to do with it? Is there a memoir in the works? My secrets will always be secrets. Anything less would be a betrayal of the friendships I value. Have there been primarily one or two Sys or have a host of people reading all the emails we’ve been sending over the years? Despite rumors, there has been virtually no internal turnover behind the curtain. The people you heard from in 2001 are the same today. Saturday, December 16, 2006 I'm catching up on this week's Wall Street Journal issues and noted this reference to Pennsylvania's 5th district congressman. ("Democrat's Energy Policy to Stress Cutting Demand," by John J. Fialka 12/11/06, p. A14): Leaders of the coalition that pushed the last energy bill through Congress -- the offshore-drilling measure passed early Sturday morning -- had hoped to pen a much larger area before Republicans gave up control. But they celebrated victory nonethless. "When it comes to passing important legislation around here," said Rep. John E. Peterson (R., Pa), "you learn to shoot for the stars in the hope that you might land on the moon. I don't know that we even approached the stratosphere with this bill, but I do believe it represents an important first step." For those last minute gift shoppers, here are a few ideas: Books: This year during the holidays I hope to post reviews of books written by 2008 presidential hopefuls. I’m working on the review for Barack Obama’s Audacity of Hope now. It is a fantastic book. It look me longer than expected to read because I had to keep stopping to think about something he wrote or just absorb what was read. The writing is powerful but not overwhelming or heavy-handed. Appropriate for almost everyone, those interested in politics, current events, values, social commentary, biography, and so on. He writes like he talks. ‘Nuff said. Computer Games: Zoo Tycoon is a favorite in our house, with everyone that plays computer games (everyone but me). It allows you to create a zoo, exhibits, amenities, hire workers, set admission prices, and so on. Players start with a certain amount of money and it decreases as they build and buy and increases as people pay to attend. Teaches a lot of valuable lessons, from environmental awareness to sound business practices. One of the little Janes came running up to me one day and said “All my workers are happy and the bathrooms are clean.” What could be better? The program tells you when the animals are unhappy and why, so turf can be replaced, exhibits enlarged, and so on. In an early outing one of the little Janes had purchased all of the animals in the same gender and they were unhappy about this. It lead to one of those “teachable moments.” Good stuff all around. Gadgetry: Someone in a pr firm hired by Best Buy sent me an email about an online feature they had which helps people select gifts. No money changed hands and no offers of freebies were made. The person left a name. I checked into her and the firm and they seem legit. I gave the feature a test run and someone at work did the same. Neither of us made any purchases based on it but we found it interesting and useful. If you aren’t sure what to get someone but you know they’d want something techie, try this out: www.wowfactorfinder.com Friday, December 15, 2006 One of the children I featured in a Missing Monday post earlier this year has been found. I don't have any details other than the name, which I won't post to let the family have some privacy. For those unfamiliar with it, some bloggers in the region highlight a local missing persons case on the first Monday of each month. Most of the time we don't know if the case is solved afterwards. In this case I noticed a flash of hits in sitemeter for the missing child's name and looked into it to see why there was sudden interest. A quick google search found a report of the recovery. Welcome home, young one! [Update: Curious, I went back through other Missing Monday posts and found three other cases that have been removed from the missing persons databases I use. So those cases were resolved, one way or another. This is interesting. In the future I will keep closer watch.] Thursday, December 14, 2006 I’ve been reading a lot about outgoing state Senator Joe Conti being named CEO of the state’s liquor board. There has been a lot of discussion and some outrage. Here are a few excerpts from newspapers: Pennsylvania's 643 liquor stores have been racking up record sales in recent years, but it was concern about the system's rising expenses that led to the hiring of a just-retired state senator to fill the newly created job of chief executive. Bucks County Republican Joe Conti, also a Penn State trustee, was hired Wednesday by a 2-1 vote, with a strong dissent from Liquor Control Board Chairman Jonathan Newman. Newman said Conti's salary of $150,000 -- more than twice what Newman makes -- is too high, and the process by which he was selected was too secretive. (“Ex-senator hired as new CEO: Secretive selection, $150,000 salary draws criticism,” Mark Scolforo Centre Daily Times 12/14/06) In another article, one of the liquor control board members, Thomas Goldsmith said this: "It's a bargain price. This is a $1.7 billion business," he said. "In the private sector, a CEO would be making $1 million a year." [Board member T. J.] Stapleton called the salary "peanuts," adding that Conti "is very knowledgable about the operation of the agency. And this isn't an agency that's easy to understand." If I remember correctly, we the voters are supposed to be tickled pink to be getting a few hundred dollars back on our property taxes. I don’t think that was called peanuts before the election. The article goes on: Conti becomes the third known retiring state lawmaker to quickly parlay his legislative career into a lucrative job in state government. Many others in the General Assembly's large outgoing class are trying to do the same. Last week, Mark McNaughton, a Republican who represented the Harrisburg suburbs in the House for 10 years, was nominated by Speaker John M. Perzel to the Gaming Control Board. He would replace outgoing member Joseph W. "Chip" Marshall III in a job that pays $145,000, more than double the $72,187 McNaughton was making as a legislator when he left office Nov. 30. Brett Feese, who represented Lycoming County for 12 years in the House, the last two years as the Appropriations Committee chairman, began work as chief counsel to House Republicans Dec. 1, the day after his term ended. He is making $155,000 annually. (“$150,000 LCB post for retired legislator: Joe Conti will become CEO, a new position. The liquor board's chair said he was "very disappointed" by the move.” By Mario F. Cattabiani Philadelphia Inquirer 12/13/06 Conti has owned at least two restaurants and held a liquor license himself as well as having served on the senate committee that oversees liquor control issues. No one can doubt that he his qualified. It is the process that is unseemly. He is the only person interviewed for the job and that just never looks good. I wish I could muster a little outrage but the whole thing just makes me tired. It never ends. Could we at least ask for a little window dressing? Couldn’t the governor bring in a few courtesy interviews? Humor the electorate at little bit, go through a process. I spent part of this evening at a PTA meeting where the conversation swirled around the school district budget and the restrictions placed on it by that bit of wording the governor stuck into the property tax reform bill. The possibility of losing music and art weigh heavily in the air. Classes are likely to be larger next year in at least one grade. We are trying to find someone to volunteer to run our major fundraiser of the year, which brings in about $10,000. It pays for classroom and playground balls and lets us buy all the teachers a $50 gift card to help pay for the things they buy for their rooms and students. As a family we are preparing for the holidays. It is just too hard sometimes to watch everything that needs to be watched, but it does not mean that it isn’t noted. This incident and other similar incidents are noted and they leave a bad taste. Wednesday, December 13, 2006 This note from Rick Taylor's campaign: Excited to begin offering services to the constituents of the PA 151st Legislative District, Representative-Elect Rick Taylor announced today that his District office will be located at 701 Horsham Road in Horsham , PA. The office, which will open just before the holidays, will be a full service center to accommodate the needs of all constituents in the District. “My number one goal is to provide excellent constituent services for everyone. I ran for public office with the promise of taking care of our families and I will follow through with that promise – one constituent need at a time” Taylor said. In addition to the office in Horsham, Taylor plans to have a mobile “office” to accommodate those who may not be able to travel due to medical or other reasons. “My staff and I will travel to all parts of the District in order to insure all constituent needs are handled quickly and efficiently.” Taylor added. For those in the city limits, check out this event: You are invited to the opening event of Local Politics Matter! We're holding a toy drive for families in South Philly, who are in need during the holiday season. Mayoral and City Council Candidates are expected to attend and show their support for the community. Please join us at 1601 on Tuesday, Dec. 16, at 7 p.m. It's located at 1601 South 10th Street, on the corner of 10th and Tasker streets. You can also visit the events calendar at www.localpoliticsmatter.com for more details. There is no cost to attend, and all we ask is that you bring a new, unwrapped toy. The toys will be distributed to children through a church a couple of blocks away. This bandaid is being pulled off very slowly. More information has been released from the poll Mclaughlin & Associates did for Bruce Castor, Montgomery County Attorney General. The telephone poll was of 300 likely voters in Montco. Note this paragraph from the executive summary (from politicspa): In a divided political environment such as this, it appears the domestic violence scandal affecting [Republican county commissioner]Tom Ellis not only hurts his candidacy but could also have a damaging affect on the campaigns of other Montgomery County Republican candidates. Trying to inoculate Tom Ellis from the scandal would be very expensive due to his low name recognition. Republicans would have to spend a lot of money upfront to raise Tom Ellis’ favorables and positive profile before the Democrats define him with the scandal. Even then, Tom Ellis would most likely be looking at a tough race. If defined by the Democrats and the news reports of his scandal, Republicans would have an extremely hard time rehabilitating Tom Ellis’ campaign and run a serious risk of polluting the campaigns of other Republicans. This could be a very long year. Tuesday, December 12, 2006 This evening I watched "Taking the Hill," which followed four veterans running for congress. These are only my impressions and rough notes. I encourage you to seek an opportunity to watch it yourself. Taking the Hill (12/12/06) Discovery Times channel 2/08/06 Band of Brothers meeting. Mike Lyon director of the Band of Brothers. Eric Massa watches himself at the rally on tv. Over 50 veterans running as Dems. Only 1 Republican. Massa and Cleland on Air America. “I wore a uniform almost all my life so other people could become millionaires and now I’m calling those people for help.” Patrick Murphy in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. “When I got back [from Iraq] I thought I’d live a normal life but when your country needs you your country needs you.” Follows Murphy’s parents campaigning for him. When he first decided to run he talked with Sen. Max Cleland to get his advice. Scenes from a bbq in Bristol (Paul Lang in the background). Murphy talking to Gwen Ifill. Says he is there to make a change not to keep a seat. Rick Bolanos from Texas, dad came from Mexico. His family had four brothers serve in Vietnam. Campaigns with two of his brothers against VA cuts. Tammy Duckworth of Illinois. Says the bridesmaid at her wedding is now flying helicopters in Iraq. Duckworth lost both her legs in Iraq. Eric Massa fundraising in NY, dialing for dollars at the dinner table, talking about how difficult it is. Meeting with professional fundraiser. Massa talks about all the advice he gets, such as not being so outspoken. Bolanos of Texas. Has a truck with an MIA flag on it. His Texas flag was stolen. Running on passion not on money. Doesn’t have money to mail out brochures so takes them and hands them out at grocery stores, etc. National Dems say “if you raise a million dollars we’ll give you a million dollars.” Congressman Rahm Emanuel, chair of DCCC, goes to meet Eric Massa. RE says you have to raise $200K every month. Don’t be so angry, be more likeable. Don’t let your family down. Murphy, Duckworth, Duck (MD), and another veteran candidate in Chicago for Vanity Fair shoot. Duckworth in Wheaten Ill for 4th of July parade. Sen. Durbin campaigns with/for her. Murphy at debate with Fitzpatrick at the Intelligencer. After the debate Murphy says he won. “Paratroopers call it like it is.” Massa says he raised more in this congressional race than in his entire military career but D’s say he is a fundraising failure. Has a tv ad. D’s say too Republican. Asks Cleland who says too warm and fuzzy. Bolanos checks on rally. Says if it’s an anti-war rally he can’t stay because we need to support the troops. Visits home of young woman soldier who died in the war. He speaks to her parents. Murphy at a fundraiser with Stephen Stills. Massa looking at the Red to Blue website. He is not on the list. He debates the incumbent, Rep. Randy Kuhn. Says in debate that he would not ban flagburning. Massa thinks it will cost him the election. Murphy in his campaign headquarters, talking about incumbent Fitzpatrick’s press conference where Murphy’s service was questioned. Clinton campaigns for Murphy. Bolanos says his family is spending every cent on his campaign. Drops out of the race. Duckworth debates Republican Peter Roskam. Massa says if he wins it won’t be with DC’s help. Cleland and Clinton campaign for him. Massa wonders where Rahn Emanuel is that day. Murphy at a union meeting. "23 hours away from greatness (election)." Duckworth at rally. Focus on getting the vote out. Barack Obama campaigns for her. Massa on election day. Says he loves campaigning on the street, much more than calling people and asking for money. Murphy the day before election day. Fitzpatrick is a the same train station as Murphy, says Murphy is a one issue candidate. Murphy says he has been at the station every single work day and Fitzpatrick’s last minute campaigning won’t help. Massa watching the returns. Gets annoyed when Rahm Emanuel says he found veteran candidates. Massa says if he wins it is against all the odds. Murphy showing his 82nd airborne cufflinks. Hearing returns. Murphy wins. Promises to make supporters proud. Won by 1521 votes. Duckworth concedes to Roskam. Massa gets 49% of the vote. Only 4 of the original 62 Band of Brothers elected. The 2007 congress will have the fewest number of veterans since World War I. Monday, December 11, 2006 A number of political industry announcements in the inbox recently: Campaigns & Elections is having a seminar on All Things Ethical / Political in Las Vegas on March 15 and 16. Topics they plan to cover include: Handling Ethical Dilemmas Fund Raising Ethics and The Law Direct Mail Standards – How far can you go? Internet Ethics: Changing Concepts, Changing Ethics? Negative Television Advertising – Is negative the new positive? Religiously Incorrect? The Appropriate Role of Religion in Politics Polling – Defining your message Progressive States has an agenda and they want your help with it: With you, we can win the fight for paid sick days, ensuring that workers don't have to choose between taking care of their sick kids and having the money to pay rent. We will win the fight for election day registration and expanded vote-by-mail that ensure every eligible voter can cast a ballot easily and that all the ballots are counted fairly. We will win the fight for renewable energy development, freeing us from foreign domination of our energy economy while creating clean jobs here at home. On our own, the Progressive States Network is just a handful of people with some good ideas. With you and your friends on our team, we can be a force to change America. The man who developed a campaign finance software for Russ Diamond's independent campaign for governor is making his product available to the public. Details here. Sunday, December 10, 2006 Tomorrow (Monday) at 9:00 p.m. "Taking the Hill" airs on the Discovery Times Channel. It follows the races of select veteran candidates including PA-08's Patrick Murphy. I hope to watch and blog about it. DSL has been very sketchy this past week. The nice people at Verizon has said a new modem/router will arrive tomorrow. In the meantime Mr. J. and I watch the modem/router we have for elusive five lights needed for a connection. However, usually as soon as you touch the keyboard one of the lights go out. It's maddening. Hopefully tomorrow all will be well again. Saturday, December 09, 2006 PA Society Dinner Re-broadcast on PCN I started watching when the rebroadcast came on at 10:00 p.m. Sen. Specter tripped slightly, or took a wrong step, when walking on the dias. James Nevels stood out as being the only non-white person on the dias. Judge Rendell wore a very zippy blouse but carried it off with dignity and style. PA Society now has a website: www.pasociety.com Gov. Rendell speaks, good news on PA’s economy. Asks for a moment of silence to honor Pennsylvanians serving their country. There were two musical groups, the University of Pennsylvania Glee Club and a string trio called Time for Three (I think, this may be wrong). It's 11:30 p.m., the awards are being given out, and I'm going to call it it a night. Every now and then the camera pans the audience. I don't recognize a single solitary soul. The post-election drop in readership is appearing as expected but my old blogposts on the Pennsylvania Society are keeping me afloat. More than half of all the visitors directly to the blog today were looking for information the organization. Friday, December 08, 2006 Our friends at The Next Mayor are live blogging from the Pennsylvania Society. You can put on your party hat and play along from home. The truly inventive can make their own scorecards or a boardgame with Fattah, Brady, Evans, Johnny Doc, Nutter and Knox tokens. What could be more fun? No bills were passed in their the Pennsyvlania House or Senate this week. One was shuffled off to committe but that was about it. A slow week; perhaps everyone was getting ready for the big doins' at the Pennsylvania Society in New York. Our accountant friends at PICPA did prepare their weekly update last week but I missed it. My apologies. From today's Inquirer ("As Congress Winds Down, It's Time to Get a Move On," by Darlene Superville), I note this paragraph: Thanks to the election, the Senate will have a new candyman or woman next year. [Rick] Santorum was the keeper of the desk that is traditionally the source of sweets for senators coming into the chamber. He stocked it with Hershey chocolates as well as jellybeans and candy corn. Let me get this straight, an incumbent senator faces an uphill re-election battle and is especially having trouble getting traction with woman voters. He has a secret stash of chocolate and he's doling it out to old white men in the senate!!! I hate to play into stereotypes but where is the logic in giving chocolate to people who can't vote for you? He should have been throwing bags of the stuff at every public appearance. I swear. Thursday, December 07, 2006 Oh me, oh my! The poll alluded to earlier this week, of Montgomery County commissioners, done at the request of county Attorney General Bruce Castor has been released, or at least leaked. See the full results at PoliticsPA. Republican County Commissioner Jim Mathews has a favorable rating of 21.1%, with 38.2% having no opinion and 36.4% never having heard of him. Ouch!! He just ran for lieutenant governor on the ticket with Lynn Swann. Fellow Republic commissioner Tom Ellis has a 10.1% favorable rating, 36.7% have no opinion and 50% have never heard of him. Lone Democrat Ruth Damsker has a 12.1% favorable rating, with 32.4% having no opinion and 52% have never heard of her. Yowza!!!! That is not good. Even worse, of those polled 51.8% said they would be less likely to vote for Ellis if they knew about a protection from abuse order filed against him in recent years. Castor, by comparison, comes up roses. 44.2% have a favorable opinion of him, 27.5% have no opinion and only 20.8% have never heard of him. Castor held a meeting for GOP officials to show them the poll results. Going by this memo, it sounds like Ellis, the county party chair, and a (if not the) primary party power broker skipped the meeting. The poll's methodology was not included in the information provided. McLaughlin & Associates conducted the poll. I say it again, oh me, oh my! Wednesday, December 06, 2006 This weekend is the annual Pennsylvania Society meeting in New York City, where Pennsylvania officials, politicos, and the monied political elite gather. If, like me, you have some interest in what will be happening there, you might want to review the schedule of events currently available on PoliticsPA. Please note that they are invitation only. If, like me, you weren't actually invited to any of the events, and would be too cheap to spend the money for travel, hotel, and taxi or train expenses, you might want to watch Saturday's Annual Dinner on PCN live at 7:00 p.m., replayed at 9:00 p.m. and again on Sunday at 6:00 p.m. (or so their schedule, subject to change, says). I plan to put on my sequined bunny slippers, sweet talk Mr. J into making cinnamon toast, and watch in style from the comfort of Casa Jane's media room (otherwise known as the den or the basement, depending). I'm watching the Philadelphia mayoral race from a distance, but trying to keep some level of current knowlege. Here are my three primary information resources, in addition to the local papers (which seem to not be going on strike. Hooray!!!!) 1) The Next Mayor. This project is an innovative, two-year multimedia partnership to focus on the issues - not just the personalities - leading to the 2007 mayor's race. It was created by the Daily News, WHYY and the Committee of Seventy. The project is funded in part by a $330,000 grant to WHYY from the William Penn Foundation. URL: http://www.thenextmayor.com/ (yes, they do have a blog and it is updated regularly). 2) A Smoke-Filled Room. City blogger ACM does a great job annotating and linking to news stories relating to the race, in addition to her usual daily news round up. URL: http://www.asmokefilledroom.blogspot.com/ 3) Young Philly Politics. This vibrant, youth-oriented city blog has enticed some of the city elders, including possible mayoral candidate Rep. Bob Brady to join in the fray. URL: http://www.youngphillypolitics.com There are doubtless other reputable resources out there. These are just the ones that come to my mind the quickest. Tuesday, December 05, 2006 Joe Sestak, Congressman-elect from Pennsylvania’s 7th district was the guest yesterday on PCN’s Call-In Show. The video is currently available on PCN’s website www.pcntv.com. Francine Schertzer is the host. These are my notes from the show. As always, my apologies for any errors or misinterpretations. In two places the video stalled (with interesting face melting effect) and I wasn’t able to capture Sestak’s entire answer. This was more likely my dsl line that PCN’s feed. Q: What issues do you anticipate working on? JS: Democratic party was not given a mandante but an opportunity. Issues: 1) Iraq 2) affordable health care 3) education pre-k through college, 4) pay as you go economy Q: Which is nearest and dearest to you? JS: health care. His daughter spent 4 months in the oncology ward. Tells the story of the boy on the other side of the curtain on the ward whose family had no health coverage, and of overhearing social workers talk with the parents about whether he could stay. Also economy, cannot keep mortgaging our future, tragic misadventure in iraq Q: health care, how to make it more affordable JS: shared responsibility between individual and society as well as business. It can only be done if bipartisan, looked at the Massachusetts plan closely. It mandates everyone participate, with the healthy participating it brings premiums down. Small businesses join together to make larger pools, competition makes costs go down Q: how to prevent insurance from raising premiums JS: competition. Massachusetts plan takes 20 or so insurance plans, allows small businesses to join together to negotiate among 20 or so plans for the best price. Q: how would the MA plan differ from European and Canadian social medicine? JS: There is a significant difference. The European model has a single payer. We should rely on competition to ensure that everyone sees what each plan offers and negotiate for best price. Q: reward practitioners for quality not quantity? JS: called fee for service in medicare. When he was looking for doctor for his daughter the military gave him information so he could tell what docs were better. Having an IT revolution would help individuals see where they might get the best performance for their medical care. Then shift from fee for service to preventive care and early diagnosis. Caller: Congrats. America is lacking a good energy policy, need to be more energy independent JS: Agree. Time to move towards energy independence has come. Need strategic plan. Change tax incentive structure. Not to oil companies to drill more but to companies that use alternative energy. Nation should shift towards alternative and renewables. Incentives to consumers to buy hybrids, etc. that help us have clean and alternative energies. Can be good for business. When JS was endorsed by the Sierra Club, he invited people from a venture capital company in Radnor with many investments in alternative energy to attend. We cannot continue to be dependent on other countries. Caller: pay as you go, besides health care, what are 2 or 3 other examples JS: First, cap on discretionary spending, Clinton established a cap on discretionary spending, Any new program must include the revenues to pay for it or shift them from another program. Will allow inflationary rise. Need discipline and accountability Q: Would programs or services cut? JS: No, but they would be challenged. Forces us to prioritize, not borrow and spend. Is it more important to spend $8 billion on a tragic misadventure in Iraq or here on homeland security? Over 50% of our debt is owned by foreign nations. Not good. Caller: Pres. Bush indicates he wants to add troops to Iraq. Can this be reversed? JS: Disagrees with Bush. Recently moved more troops to Baghdad and violence increased. Congress must argue, compel, and provide oversight. Citizens of this nation do not want increase in troops. Military people in Congress like JS can add experience and background (mentions his own service in the military and the Clinton administration). Mentions redeployment 2007. Encourage Iraq to accept responsibility Q; withdrawal plan JS: We must provide a timetable, at least a year in advance, to give parties in that country time to ask surrounding nations in region to come together, with us at the table if they want us, to work toward resolving political issues in that country. The US can call an international conference to pursue peaceful resolution to challenges there. We would redeploy to other parts of the region. Iraq must accept responsibility. Every day we are in Iraq our own security is less. The Taliban is growing again in Afghanistan. Iran and nuclear weapon. Middle East. We need to pay attention to the entire global neighborhood not just one house, Iraq. We must have a date certain. Caller: How to bridge the gap in our country divided? JS: If voters gave one message is that they want a coming together to address problems. JS did not running on the left or the right but to fix problems. Wants to fix problems. Spent time since elections reaching out across the aisle, meeting with local leaders, mentions names, chambers of commerce, met with union that supported Weldon. Coming together to address our problems. That’s why he is taken with MA health care plan – a bipartisan coming together of a Republican governor and a Democratic legislature. Must tactically work together. Caller: You ran a great classy campaign. Caller recently lost his grandfather to Parkinson’s. Stem cell research? JS: 110% in support of stem cell research. 3000 individuals (sympathies to caller) die prematurely that might have lived if stem cell research successful. Mentions daughter’s chemo (daughter now doing well). How can JS not be for it? Caller: Voted for you. What will you do with elderly with drugs and cost of high heating oil? JS: Prescription drugs issue, wants to address early to change approach. Should have federal government negotiate with pharmaceutical companies to get best price, like veterans administration does. Median drug price at VA is 46% less than that via medicare. Current law does not permit the federal government to negotiate drug prices. Donut hole could be closed if can get fair prices. It is wrong if a drug made here can be sold overseas for less than here but cannot be reimported. JS recognizes how imp the pharmaceutical industry is (daughter) and how important R&D is, but wants to be fair to seniors. Donut hole can cost seniors an additional 18% of their income. Caller: jobs going overseas. Your thoughts on outsourcing? JS: One short-term, change tax incentives that reward companies that move off shore or move jobs offshore. Second, key is to tie knowledge to innovation. America’s educational system allowed us to get competitive edge. Economists believe that if things don’t change China will be #1 world economy by 2050 with India #2. Education is key. China admires not only Harvard but community colleges that produce artisans (welders, etc). E.g. working with businesses for clean energy. Imagine wind turbines made here. Must work with businesses to keep us competitive. Make sure worker rights and environmental standard are included in trade agreements. Caller: environment, global warming JS: When we had 16 EPA administrators this past year say global warming is real and a challenge, plus all the scientists saying the same thing, how can we not believe it? Supportive of Kyoto treaty, and further in long term. Increase CAFÉ standards. Must change how we measure mpg. Detroit made cars lighter to get better mpg, Japan made more efficient. JS: Great district. Born and raised here. Left for Navy for 30 years. Came back to visit family. Middle class working family is primary component of district. People are just comfortable with one another. Caller: ethics and accountability. Did election speak to those demanding great accountability? JS: public concerned about reality and perception of influence by lobbyists on votes. JS could vote for any ethics, lobbying or campaign finance law, none would be too strong. All JS needs to know he learned in the Navy : don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t steal. The government’s loss of credibility is tragic. At orientation week, Nancy Peolosi said ethics was her highest priority (said it 4 times). Q: what was orientation week like? JS: Good, Republicans were together with Democrats for part of it. JS had been so focused on his own race he did not know about other races, enjoyed meeting other new congressional reps. Learned about staffing requirements, protocols. Met with Democratic caucus. Looking forward to getting back to DC when Congress reconvenes in January. Q: Have committee assignments been made yet? JS: Not yet. JS would like defense security, intelligence, armed services, or appropriations, but really most wants to serve on a committee that concerns domestic issues mentioned in this show. Believes in investing in people. Caller: public education, underfund schools but implement programs like No Child Left Behind? JS: Must establish pay as you go economy, then say if NCLB is of value then need to invest $40 billion needed to achieve it’s potential success. Need to change it, fully fund it but also change type of testing. Must judge a school if scores go up depending on where the kids start not judge them all together (if kids start with lower scores, must take improvements into consideration, not just one standard for all). Watching his daughter, he is more appreciative of accessible pre-k for those who want it. $1 in pre-k gets $7 in more productivity when that child is an adult, less crime and less time in jail. Affordable accessible college or training. Tax credits to college or training school or grad school. Knowledge and innovation undergirds the economy. Parallel investment in health of individuals. Caller: Congrats. Health care. Plans for health care for young people. College grads but jobs don’t provide health care and can’t afford it indivdually. JS: Spoke today at Chester Co Industry and Business Council and at chambers of commerce. 4-5 years ago 60% of companies with 200 or more employees offered health care, now much lower. Small businesses provides most new jobs. But can’t offer health care. Shared responsibility between individuals and companies. Mandate that all must participate and company must be in pool with other small companies to leverage negotiating power. Premiums will go down. Healthy people in plans, premiums go down. Preventive care means lower taxes because public spending goes down. We are close to $9 trillion in debt but when Clinton left office we had a $5 trillion surplus. We have to reverse that. Caller: Congrats. Grad student, worried about interest rates on Stafford loans, and also pell grants which haven’t gone up in 5 years. JS: We should take student loan interest rates back to where they were. Cut interest rates in half to where they were. We need to take all tuition assistance programs (6 of them) and combine them into a simple $3000 tax credit per year that you are in college. More parents are investing in college savings plan. Often that will cover costs of public college. In PA, public university tuitions risen over 50%, JS would love to be on Education committee to work on disciplining costs. [choppy video] Caller: 73 years old. Best economy in his lifetime. Limo driver. Sees help wanted signs and stock market going up. How come public didn’t know that. JS: GNP gone up 3% each year, unemployment at an all time low. But real wages gone down 1800$. Productivity has gone up. Real wages have declined. Fruits of that has gone to the wealthy. Tax credits for top 1% wealthy. If you earned $42K, you got $16, if you were a millionaire you got a Lexus. In first 2 years of Bush administration over 2 million jobs were lost. Jobs have come back but median wage of jobs lost was app. 34K, new jobs at app. 30K. Add in a 70% increase in health costs, college tuition gone up 50%, but tax credits for wealthy? Not good. Caller: Congrats. Privatization of social security. JS: opposed to privatization. [choppy video] Caller: Congrats. Tax reform. Alternative minimum tax. JS: Surprised and disappointed that this congress has not addressed alternative min tax. Meant to address millionaire and multimillionaires and now encroaches on middle-class. Caller: term limits. Also, as a congressman are you required to pay for health care? JS: Will not be taking congressional health care, sticking with what he has. Does not like term limits. There would be no need for campaign finance reform if all candidates, even incumbents, had a certain amount of money to spend. Incumbents would run on record. Need more even footing. The current need to raise money in campaigns is harmful to the process. A lot of good men and women donated to his campaign. Those who have vibrant ideas and integrity should stay in office. Monday, December 04, 2006 Just in time, Alison Hawkes of the Intelligencer has published an article called "New House speaker needs a translator," which provides a list of comments by presumed new Pennsylvania Speaker of the State House Rep. Bill DeWeese, with options for their meaning. I didn't do so well. You can try your luck. Maybe the house will appoint a speaker who doesn't believe in secret leadership slush funds and doesn't need a translator and didn't demote people for voting against the July, 2005 pay raise? For the month of September the Pennsylvania State Senate met in full session for five days, the 19th, 20th, 25th, 26th, and 27th. As promised, when the fall journals were made available I am starting to note when senators were on legislative or other types of leave. If it becomes too much trouble I’ll stop. It will also probably take a few months for me to get the hang of all the different types of leave. But, here, goes, as always, since bills passing the state house or senate are reported in the weekly legislative update, I look specifically for interesting debates or comments in the journals: Sept. 19 (46 p.): legislative leave for Sens. Kitchen, O’Pake, and Anthony Williams. Not much of interest was reported in the journal itself. On pages 45-6 of the pdf, 2013-2104 of the print, Sen. Fumo talks about Iraq (again). Sept 20 (7 p.): legislative leave for Sens. Fumo, Kitchen, and Mellow. Nothing of interest in the journal itself. Sept. 25 (12 p.): legislative leave for Sens. Greenleaf (later cancelled) and Mary Jo White. Temporary leave for Sens. Kasunic (later cancelled) and Punt. Leave for personal reasons for Sen. Fumo. Sept. 26 (17 p.): Legislative leave for Sens. Scarnati (later cancelled), Mellow and C. Williams. Temporary leave for Sen. Punt Sept. 27th (11 p.): Legislative leave for Sens. Mellow, Washington, C. Williams, Wozniak, Stout, Mary Jo White and Kasunic (later cancelled). Temporary leave for Sen. Conti. On pages 8-0 of the pdf (2060-2061 of the print) Sen. Fumo talks about Iraq (again). Later, on pages 9-11 of the pdf (2061-2063 of the print), Sen. Hughes talks about gun control and violence. Sunday, December 03, 2006 It's the first Monday of the month, time to highlight a missing person's case. KRISTOPHER ALONSO PHILLIPS Case Type: Endangered Runaway DOB: May 28, 1992 Missing Date: Oct 4, 2006 (age 14) Height: 5'2" / Weight: 100 lbs Missing City: PHILADELPHIA Hair: Black / Eyes: Brown Circumstances: Kristopher was last seen on October 4, 2006. He may still be in the local area, or he may have traveled to Washington, DC. Kristopher's left ear is pierced, and he has a scar on his left forearm. Bruce Castor, Montgomery County District Attorney, commissioned a poll to see how incumbent Republican officials are viewd by the electorate and it came up with a few surprises. The only name leaked so far is county commissioner Tom Ellis, who "fared poorly." This information, and more, is provided in an article from the Times Herald, "Poll: Ellis' re-eleciton chances 'real low," by Margaret Gibbons (12/01/06). It isn't online but both GrassrootsPA and PoliticsPA have a pdf copy. And here I thought things might be boring out here in the 'burbs in '07. Guess not. Saturday, December 02, 2006 A few tidbits from the inbox, the mailbox, and things tucked inside the screen door: The folks at Clean Water Action would like you to write your congressperson and urge them to pass the Clean Water Authority Restoration Act when they reconvene in January. Pro-Choice America has released a report called Winning the Pro-Choice Swing Vote: NARAL’s Pro-Choice Positive Impact on the 2006 Elections which includes data on PA-08 and PA-07. Evan Bayh's All America PAC is conducting a short survey to give online activists an opportunity to weigh in on the issues they care about the most. I looked at the first page and wow! are they on target for collecting useful data. They do ask for your opinion on issues but they also ask how you were active in the last election (wrote a letter, attended a fundraiser, hosted a house party, etc) and your email. Useful data to have if you hope to build a grassroots movement.

Final part to the family. I would really appreciate any feedback as I am considering furthering the adventures of the family if there is an interest in it. I woke up several hours later. The daylight now bathing the room and I was happy to see Jill still fast asleep and snuggled closely to me. Her head resting on my shoulder and her left arm draped across my chest. She looked so beautiful laying there asleep as I looked down at her. I watched her breathe softly but I didn't have the heart to wake her even though I had to pee real badly. Finally she stired just enough to where it gave me an opportunity to gently release myself from her and make my way to the bathroom. I was careful to make as little noise as possible as I quietly stepped into the hallway. From upstairs I could hear the faint sound of conversation and laughter probably coming from the kitchen so I knew some of the family were up and about. I was however surprised that nobody was in the bathroom when I stepped inside and flicked on the light while closing the door yet leaving it unlocked. Sure, I could have used the toilet for my morning pee but let's be honest. There is nothing like a good hard pee inside of your morning shower. Besides I had a pretty good feeling of what was to come. And I was right. I got the water heated up pretty good and I no sooner stepped into the roomy confines of the rock shower when Jill entered after me just as naked as she was when I left her sleeping in my bed. "is this a private shower?" She asked as she wrapped her arms around my waist. "Not anymore." I said as I leaned in and kissed her deeply. My morning hard on was still pretty prominent and with Jill now with me, it would surely be sticking around a lot longer. "Are you up for trying what we talked about last night?" She asked. "Well, I am all ready up, and I haven't gone yet so of course. Besides, I had a pretty good idea that you would be joining me in here anyways." "I was hoping you would say that" said Jill as she went to her knees in front of me. Her soft petite hand wrapped around my semi hard cock as she readied herself for the first hot stream of my piss. As she looked up at me with a smile of anticipation, I released a hard squirt that hit her neck and made her flinch a little bit in surprise but she was not only quick to get used to it, she seemed like she was genuinely enjoying it. My stream was still pretty strong and when she learned how to manipulate my dick where she wanted it to squirt; she let it splash on one of her firm tits before switching over to hose the other one off. She finally was brazen enough before my peeing finished to aim my dick for a little squirt into her mouth for a little bit of a taste. I watched as she held the liquid in her mouth while she was clearly gauging the taste before spitting it out onto the floor of the shower. By now I was finished peeing but she was in no hurry to get back to her feet. Her hand still curled around my shaft while her other hand washed it with the hot shower water. She looked up at me with her big beautiful green eyes before taking my cock into her mouth for one of her mind blowing blow jobs that I have quickly grown to love. Her tongue slid expertly up and down my length while her hand cupped my balls. Occasionally she would release me only to keep just the head engulfed in between her hot wet mouth while teasing the underside with her swirling tongue. She must have known I was about to finally blow my load as she took my cock all the way into her throat once again. Jill gave my shaft a few strokes and my muscles tightened as I released a thick load of cum into her mouth. To be honest, with the day I had yesterday, I was surprised that I was able to give Jill the amount that I had given her but she swallowed everything I had before releasing my dick from her thin red lips. Naturally I took her by the hands and helped her to her feet before I took her tiny body into my arms and kissed her deeply. "Now its my turn" I told her before getting on my knees to return the favor. She seemed not only excited by what was about to come but also finally getting to release her own morning bladder. Gently I spread her legs apart as she found the sides of the shower to brace herself for balance. No matter how many times I see her pussy, I will forever be in awe of the most beautiful sight I have ever laid eyes on. I couldn't resist running my finger up and down her slit while parting the lips with my thumb and forefinger. Leaning my head forward I gave her clit a few licks with my tongue to get her nice and excited to relieve herself. "Whenever you are ready" I said still holding her pussy lips open with my fingers. I have only seen it once but I kind of considered myself a seasoned pro by now at the art of water sports. She tilted her head back as the first squirt came out but immediately she was intent on watching every moment of the action and what I planned to do with her nectar once it started to gush in a steady stream. I positioned my mouth for a quick swallow before letting the rest go into my wide open mouth and dribble back out while my tongue flicked away at her clit for the whole duration. The sensation was a bit much for her to take as she gripped my head tightly with both hands and rode the wave of a mini orgasm. As Jill was catching her breath, I gave her labia and her wet hole a passionate kiss before getting back to my feet and holding her tightly to me. With her head pressed against my chest and her arms wrapped around me, I applied some body wash to a scrubber and massaged her back and firm little ass with the rich lather. She moaned into my shoulder when my hand massaged into the crack of her ass and I slid a finger into her tight little asshole. After a couple of minutes, Jill gave me a kiss on my neck before looking up at me with her big green almond shaped eyes. "I want you to fuck me once more before we leave the shower Jake. I have become addicted to having your hard cock inside of me." How could I pass up a request like that. My dick has become addicted to her too. She wasn’t the only fuck I have ever had but surely one of the finest. I’m not sure if it was because she was my sister or if she really was that talented and loving. Probably a combination of all of the above. Whatever the case, I needed my sister again and I needed her bad. I turned her around and she held on to the shower head for support while I took my already rock hard dick and slid the head up and down the crack of her ass until it found the hot wet opening of her tight cunny. When my dick found its mark, Jill spread her legs further while I pushed further into her. Her pussy is nothing short of amazing as her muscles gripped my thick hardness and pulled me further and further inside of her until I was in to the hilt and ready to pull back out and repeat the rhythm. To keep things interesting and pleasurable for her I wrapped one arm around her chest and fondled her firm tits while my other arm wrapped lower around her waist where I found her stiff little clit poking out as if begging to be stimulated. My cock still sawed in and out of her lovely hole as she was soon moaning loudly and her legs now showing signs of buckling under the pressure. With my arms still tightly around her, she was unable to control herself any longer and quaked violently while whimpering softly. Her soft smooth body turned to jelly as she was nothing more than dead weight in my grasp with my still hard cock buried deep into her pussy. While she was recovering, I bent down and softly kissed her on her neck while I gently fondled her breasts. "That was incredible Josh. I think I passed out for a moment" said Jill as she fought to regain her normal breathing. When her strength was coming back and she finally realized that I was still inside of her, she started to slowly push herself back into me to resume our fucking. It wasn't long before we found our rhythm again and her cunt muscles pulled me further inside of her. When she reached down between her legs and started fondling my balls, I couldn't take much more. I drove my cock in one last time until I was pressed against her cervix and emptied the contents of my balls into my sister one more time. Now it seemed to be my turn to go weak kneed as she clamped down to keep me inside as long as possible to milk every last drop from my shaft. After it was all said and done, my softening cock finally slid out of her and Jill turned herself to face me, wrapped her arms around me in a tight embrace and kissed me with incredible passion. "I love you so much Aaron." "I love you too Jill, merry Christmas." It was finally time to get out of the shower once we had finished cleaning each other of the messes we had made. I grabbed a towel and wrapping it around Jill’s back, I grabbed the other end and used it to pull her closer to my body so I could take a little time drying her off while I continued to kiss her. Neither of us bothered with any real clothes, choosing instead to slip on our thick bath robes after drying off before finally making our way downstairs to our already awake family. As we stepped into the kitchen, Dad, Aunt Sonja, Molly, and Keri were all sitting at the table finishing breakfast and having coffee while Mom and Uncle Bill were at the counter by the sink doing not sure what. I had quickly noticed that the rest of the family decided to wear the same morning attire as Jill and I. I wondered silently to myself if they were also naked underneath their robes as well. My guess would be a resounding, "of course" but I am sure I will find out soon eventually. "The whole family is finally awake now" said dad."It's about time you both decided to join us. We all have been up for hours." Obviously dad was bullshitting again as he always does and we looked over to mom for assurance. We both smiled as unbeknownst to dad, mom held up one finger and silently mouthed, "one hour." "Nice try dad" I responded as made my way around the table giving good morning kisses to the ladies of my family while Jill walked over and sat on dads lap with a hug and a kiss of her own. "What about me?" Asked mom feeling a bit left out. I then made my way over to the sink where mom and Uncle Bill were standing and gave mom a kiss as well. Not sure why it surprised me as much as it did even though it shouldn’t have. Mom took the aggressors role when my lips touched hers and grabbed my head while firmly pressing her lips tighter to mine while her tongue snaked its way into mine. I responded by reaching my hands down and grabbed both of her robe covered ass cheeks and gave then a tight squeeze while my uncle watched it all in silent amusement. She let out a little squeal when I pulled her groin tightly to mine. "Whoa, patience dear horny son of mine. In due time" Mom said as she reached down and gave my cock a hearty squeeze through the outside of my robe. As she teasingly walked away from me I reached into the cupboard for a glass to pour myself some cold orange juice from the fridge. Aunt Sonja was the first to break the sudden quiet by acknowledging the fact that it was Christmas morning. "Merry Christmas everybody. Once everybody has finally had their breakfast, I think we should take this party into the living room. There are presents waiting to be opened." As she said that, I noticed that Aunt Sonja glanced over to Mom with a slight grin but I shrugged it off for whatever reason while mom returned the grin. It was a matter of minutes that we all made our exodus into the living room picking out where we going to sit. Jill and I snuggled into the big plush recliner with her mostly on my lap. Mom, Dad, Aunt Sonja and Uncle Scott all fit onto the sectional while Molly and Keri were seated on the floor. It even looked like a Norman Rockwell painting with the brightly lit tree and the fire roaring in the fire place. Presents were passed out and we spent a good hour unwrapping our gifts and sharing some good laughs and holiday cheer. It was Keri that announced that the last package had left the bottom of the tree. "It might be the last present under the tree but the gifts are far from being passed out" said Mom. She obviously had something up her sleeve when some of us looked at each other for confirmation. When I saw that it was only the guys that looked confused, I soon realized that all the girls were in on something. Molly ran out of the room real quick and returned a minute later carrying what looked like black velvet cloth of some sort and my look of confusion was even more evident. Aunt Sonja became the spokeswoman for the group of girls. “The girls and I have a bit of a surprise for the three of you. Rather a competition of sorts if you are up for it?" I looked over at Dad and Uncle Scott and even though I had no clue what they were planning, something told me that the other two guys had a semi good idea as they both smiled and nodded in the affirmative. I felt comfortable enough to do the same. “What we are going to do is play a little game of sensory deprivation. The idea is we will all disrobe. You can't hear us and you will not see us. You will not be allowed to feel us with anything but your cocks and even then we will do the holding of those. The idea of this game is that we will do certain things to each of you while your job is to guess which one of us is doing them to you. The game will continue till you cum. Once you do so, we will remove the earplugs while leaving the bag on your head. It is then your time to guess who your partner was before the bag is removed. Still game?" Of course we were all game. What horny guy wouldn't be? Getting the unanimous approval they were looking for, Molly stepped eagerly forward with the black cloths she had left the room to get. I still wasn't sure what they were but got a better idea when Dad was the first one up. She handed each of us a pair of ear plugs to insert into our ears then took one of the cloths and opened it up while pulling it over his entire head. I noticed it was made out of velvet, had a drawstring around the opening and the only hole in it happened to have been an opening right where a person’s mouth is to prevent suffocation. With each velvet bag, Molly drew slightly each drawstring so as not to be uncomfortable since that wasn't the idea. Next was Uncle Scott and then myself. I think it is safe to say the girls have piqued my curiosity at this point. As the game got underway, I felt a pair of hands standing me up. The silence was amazing and I was actually quite interested in what was going to happen next. Once I was standing I felt possibly the same set of hands undo the tie on my robe and slowly removing it from me, leaving me standing ass naked in front of the rest of the family. Even though I couldn't see, hear, nor feel anything, I was pretty sure I wasn't the only naked person in this room right now. Once I was completely disrobed, I felt my guiding hands gently seat me back down in my chair. I waited in dark silence for a moment before I felt a soft hand wrapped around my semi hard shaft, giving it a few slow strokes. Suddenly a warm and wet set of lips engulfed the head while taking it's time sliding my length as far into her throat as she could go. As calm and relaxed as I now was, my mind raced back and forth over who was giving me this most incredible blow job. It finally occurred to me that I didn't much care at this point and that I would just sit back and enjoy what was happening to me. The funny thing about sensory deprivation is it makes you pay more attention to things you would normally take for granted. I fought the urge to reach out and touch the hair of my mystery dick sucker but the moment my arm went to reach, I felt another hand grab my arm and pull it back where it should be as a reminder of the no touching rule. "Apparently I have two women around me. One to give me pleasure and the other to keep me in line" I thought to myself. I was starting to get the hang of things. As the sucking continued, I was suddenly surprised by a new sensation. A soft breast with an obviously erect nipple was now being sensuously rubbed up and down my chest. It was almost sensory overload for me which was a bit on the ironic side seeing how I was supposed to be deprived of all that right now. The longer the girls kept it up, the harder it was getting for me to keep from blasting a load down someone’s throat but I fought it and fought it well. That was until the owner of the tit on my chest redirected herself into the only opening on my head bag which was my mouth. I was very thankful for the offering as I accepted it and drew the hard nipple between my lips and swirled my tongue around it. This was my first real chance to make an uneducated guess on who my lady was. My only advantage in this game was the fact that I have not only seen all the ladies in the house completely naked but I have now fucked each one. It was hard to gauge the size of the whole breast by just the feel of the nipple with a tongue but the nipple felt fairly big, fairly adult in size and tasted vaguely sweet and familiar. I was having my doubts that it was Jill, Keri or Molly. When the mystery tit was exhumed from my lips, I was somewhat saddened because I was really enjoying being able to suck on it but my disappointment wasn't to last long at all. My guiding hands suddenly grabbed me by both wrists, helped me to my feet and walked me forward a few feet before helping me to my knees on the floor. Thank God for helping hands because I would have been a clumsy mess if I was left to do it blindly on my own. I was soon aware that someone was now on the floor in front of me as I could feel her silky smooth legs brushing up against my own. If I didn't know any better, it felt like I was in a doggy style position with someone I would not see. Once in position, I didn't have time to seek thing out for myself. I felt a soft set of fingers yet again wrap around the shaft of my now rock hard dick. She gave it a few good courtesy strokes before reaching me forward to place the head of my dick at the entrance of it's unseen target. Once it was connected to its mark, the recipient pushed back until I was buried inside of her. I was hoping this would be the giveaway on who my girl was by maybe narrowing it down to whether or not I could feel any pubic hair but my mystery hands was still there to make it that much harder for me. "These girls thought of everything!" I thought to myself. As I was matching the rhythm of my partner, my mystery hands had her fingers still wrapped gently around my shaft to keep me from accidentally slipping out of the pussy while the other hand was holding my ass and helping me to keep up the fuck tempo. It was a strange feeling but I enjoyed it very much. Even though I couldn't see my partner she was doing a great job keeping rhythm with me while her pussy gripped me tight with every stroke. Mystery hands now took a slight break from pushing on my ass to reaching through my legs to fondle my full and aching ball sack. I didn't know how much more I could take but I continued to fight it some more until I surprised even myself. I couldn't believe how hot, wet and tight this pussy was. Most of all I was surprised it wasn't more obvious to me who it belonged to because where I know I experienced this pussy at least once before, it just felt much different this go around. After several minutes, the fingers around my cock tightened their hold and pulled me out of of my mystery lover. I was actually a little thankful for the relief even though I didn't have a clue what was going to happen next but I knelt in silence while wondering to myself if Dad and Uncle Scott were enjoying themselves nearly as much as I was at this moment. My train of thought soon derailed as my attentions now drifted to the now familiar set of fingers gripping my cock for a few more strokes to keep me hard and at attention. It suddenly dawned on me that my fuck buddy from a few minutes ago was still actually positioned in front of me and has not moved. Her legs still pressed slightly to mine. The fingers working my cock suddenly stopped and I could feel a condom being rolled onto my hard shaft. Now I was a little confused but I was curious enough to find out where this was going to take me. The mystery hand holding my now sheath laden dick had once again lined up the head of my dick to it's intended point of entry, however my point of entry was now not where I was before. My dick now snuggled into the entrance of my lover’s asshole where once again she pushed back into me like before. The only difference is the push was much more resistant and tighter. "My God! I am in someone’s ass" I thought to myself as the familiar guiding hands held my cock and pushed my ass forward with each arousing thrust. I could somewhat feel my partners hand rubbing furiously at her clit while her pace quickened like a mad woman pushing violently back into me. Her pace suddenly stopped as my partner seized up in an intense orgasm that I felt even through my body. Her anal muscles gripped my cock even tighter as I slowed my pace to long deep lunges to add to her intensity before I finally felt her go a little limp and relaxed. It was now up to me to bring her back to life as I found my second wind and started to pound into her with a greater speed. I knew I wasn't going to be far behind her and apparently the mystery hand holding my cock knew it too as she suddenly pulled me out of my lovers asshole and quickly tore my condom off. My cum blasted out all over the recipients ass cheeks and her back while the hand jerked my cock of every last drop of cum it get. I was exhausted and speechless as I sat there catching my breath. I could feel a warm set of lips engulfing my cock once again to clean me off before feeling a hand reach up under my head bag to remove my ear plugs finally. The sudden sounds once again was not as peaceful as it was a few minutes ago but I could still hear slight moaning from around the room letting me know there were still people fucking around me. With my head bag still on, a voice suddenly spoke. "Now that you have blown your load, do you think you know who your mystery lady is?" The voice sounded like Aunt Sonja but it dawned on me that I had no more idea now than I did when we started but I was willing to give it my best guess. "I am almost convinced my partner was Mom." "Are you ready to find out if you were right?" The voice asked. "As ready as I will ever be. Let’s do it." I said eagerly. The bag came slowly off and even though my eyes were trying to adjust to the sudden light, I got the surprise of my life. I was floored. Before me still on her hands and knees was my Moms Mom, ass up with my cum splattered all over her ass and back. She turned her head back to me and gave me a big smile before blowing me a kiss. Gran was one of them ladies that even though she was in her early sixties still looked pretty hot for her age. She was a natural beauty with long black hair and big green eyes. Almost gypsy like which is where I imagine Jill inherited her smoldering looks from. On top of all that, she always took great care of herself and had never smoked a day in her life so her skin was naturally healthy. I lunged forward giving Gran a big hug as we have always been really close and I was happy to have her here with the rest of the family. "Thats quite a dick you got on you dear boy. Glad I finally got a chance to try it out" said Gran. "Thanks Gran" I said before finally becoming aware of my surroundings."Hey, where is Grandpa?" She didn't say a word but merely just pointed her finger behind me. I turned around to see a most surreal sight. Grandpa was behind me on the farthest side of room. Aunt Sonja was on her back with her legs sticking straight in the air. Grandpa was between her legs fucking her missionary style. Keri, who had joined the fun, was sitting a top her moms head facing Grandpa. Aunt Sonja was eating Keri's pussy while Keri made out with Grandpa. This was my first look at all the action that was now going on around the room since having the bag removed from my head. Dad was seated in a chair with his bag still on. Molly was kneeling on the floor with his dick halfway down her throat giving him what looked like a most incredible blow job. Uncle Scott on the other hand was on the floor on his knees with his hands somehow handcuffed behind his back. In front of him was Jill on her hands and knees getting fucked doggy style. He still had his bag on as well so obviously neither he nor Dad had came yet either. I had decided to have a seat on the chair I was in when we started this game just so I could watch all the action going on in the room. As I propped my feet up on the recliners foot rest, Grandma had decided to join me by climbing up into my lap with her back facing me. My semi hard dick rested between her legs just inches away from her still wet pussy. As we watched Jill and Uncle Scott, Grandma reached down, grabbed my cock and started to stroke me for a while my hands sought out and caressed her big firm mammaries. “I see you are a titty man just like the rest of the men in this family” Grandma said in between soft moans. If she only knew. As we watched Uncle Scott, it was getting pretty clear that he was about to bust his nut. Scotts pace quickened and Jill moaned loud enough for me to wonder if Scott and Dad were able to hear her. Scott gave a small groan before seizing up and I knew that he was cumming inside of Jill. Once he let loose with everything he had, he paused for a moment before leaning back and letting himself slide out of Jill’s pussy. She laid her chest against the floor while her ass was still in the air and I could see Uncle Scotts cum dribbling out of her messy reddened hole. Mom moved over and reached up under the bag and removed his earplugs while asking. “Ok, you have now finished. Any clue as to who your partner was?” Uncle Scott was silent for a moment and while he was thinking about the answer, Grandma now had my cock standing at attention once again. As she spread her pussy lips apart, she lined up the head of my cock to her wet hole and let it slide in with much ease. “I am going to take a wild guess and say my girl was Molly” said Uncle Scott when he finally made up his mind. Mom reached down and lifted the bag off of his head as his first view was Jill’s luscious ass staring straight up at him. “Hi Uncle Scott!” said Jill with a cute eager wave. Scott looked around to survey the scene around him and was very surprised to see Grandma riding my dick. It was obvious that he was unaware Grandma was visiting too. “Mom! How long have you been here? Where is Dad?” As Grandma rode me for all she was worth, she only pointed her thumb in the direction behind us. Scott followed the direction of her thumb and saw his dad now fucking his wife doggy style while Keri was now lying on her back in front of Aunt Sonja with her legs spread. Sonja’s head was buried between her legs while her mom continued to eat her out. Our attentions now switched to Dad as we watched Molly astride his lap riding him much like Grandma was currently riding me only Molly was facing dad while she held onto the back of the sofa for stability. He looked like he was having a difficult time fighting the urge to just reach up and grab handfuls of ass cheeks like any guy would but he kept it under control and let his arms lay motionless to his sides. It was very erotic watching Molly’s firm tits rubbing furiously against Dads chest as she rode for all she was worth Mom kept herself busy by making her way over to Uncle Scott and taking his dick down her throat to clean all the excess cum and her daughter’s juices off of him. Grandma on the other hand had reached down and was now fondling my balls while my cock sawed in and out of her hot pussy. I moved a hand down in front of her until it found her hardened clitoris and I started to massage her little button. My fingers must have been doing the trick because she suddenly started twitching and I realized that I was giving my Grandma an orgasm. How many Grand sons can actually lay claim to that? Her orgasm soon triggered my own and with her constant fondling of my balls, I unleashed a flood of cum deep inside of her hot snatch. Neither of us felt the need to go anywhere or separate so we sat with my cock still buried inside of her to finish watching dad. It was actually Dads loud sudden grunting that turned our attentions to him as he was the next one to cum. Molly still sitting atop of him while he squirted forcibly into her. Molly’s grunts and moans were fainter as she took all he had to give her as quietly as possible. The routine was the same with dad as had been with myself and Uncle Scott. Mom walked over and removed his ear plugs from underneath his bag while asking the familiar question. “Ok, it’s the moment of truth. Who is your mystery girl? Dad didn’t hesitate at all like Scott and I did. He was quite sure of himself on who he thought he had. “No doubt about it. I have been fucking Molly.” Mom reached for the bag and slowly pulled it off to add to the suspense. As the cloth cleared his eye, he was now staring directly at Molly with their face just inches apart. “Hi Uncle Thomas! Thank you for fucking me” said Molly as she immediately planted her lips to his. Dad was the only one who guessed correctly And his smile turned to surprise as he spotted his mother in law sitting on his sons lap. “Mom! Holy shit. Where is Dad?” By now, we all knew the drill as we heard it enough. Only this time five us said nothing but pointed our finger to the back corner just in time to see Grandpa pulling his massive prick out of Aunt Sonja’s pussy while jerking the biggest load of cum I had ever seen onto her ass cheeks and up onto the back of her neck while at the same time yelling out.

Another Comic-Con International has come and gone, and while San Diego is but a memory, that doesn't mean we're finished with it just yet. In addition to our continuing coverage of panel reports, interviews and more, Comic Book Resources continues its annual tradition of breaking down the show's sights and spectacle with our photo parades! This time around, things are a little bit different, however, as CBR's head honcho Jonah Weiland finds himself cast away on a tropical beach, recovering from the grueling 2013 CBR TV schedule, leaving Senior Editor Stephen Gerding in charge of things -- including the comments on Pinguino Kolb and photos below! Photos by Pinguino Kolb |This "Dracula" promotion is a perfect example| of how huge the off-site SDCC displays have become |Even the pedicabs were themed this year| |Adult Swim Day Spa.| Man, I could have used an hour here. |Giant Ice King| |This Hello Kitty/Uglydoll mashup is amazing||Fantastic Aquaman cosplay!| |"Lone Wolf and Cub" co-creator Kazuo Koike| and his translator |Dueling Mad Hatters!| |It's amazing how TARDIS cosplay has become a thing||I can't remember ever seeing a bad Mortal Kombat cosplay| |LotR meets Star Wars is a fan film waiting to happen||The candy cane baseball bat really sets off| the crazy in Harley's smile. Well done! |Disney's evil Queen seems rather friendly to me||A pixely pixy - this has to be a Minecraft thing| |Adorable Princess Bubblegum||Lego!| |Avengers Assemble!||This racing game promoting History Channel's "Vikings"| looked like a lot of fun |Mega Man||Walking Dead Game booth| |Sergio Aragones autographs a vintage collection of his comics||I think this is Cable hiring Boba Fett to find| his missing eye. Deadpool's gonna be so jealous! Photos by Caitlin Holland |Not sure what this is, but it's pretty cool||Metal Sonic 3.0 crosses over with| "Wreck It Ralph's" Vanellope Von Schweetz |DC's First Couple||Ms. Marvel| |Casey Jones seems a little too friendly with Bebop||The first truly frightening, yet genuinely impressive,| sight of the show |Gender-swapped Winter Soldier cosplay||Really impressive Black Panther| |Continuities collide in this Bane/Batgirl team-up||We need more Big Barda cosplay| |Not clear on what this is, but it looks badass||Mass Effect cosplayers| |Even more Mass Effect cosplay||A fresh take on Batman's rogues gallery| |We're obviously past the days of cardboard and duct tape costumes||Static Shock| |This Nova cosplay is like an Ed McGuinness| drawing come to life. Amazing! |Baby Hellboy flanked by Spidey's foes| |Impressive battle-damaged Iron Man cosplay||This take on Young Justice's Cheshire is fantastic| |Evil clowns are evil||A different take on Chewie and Han| |Young Justice member Ms. Martian||Future Avengers movie line-up?| |Deadpool-Hulk smash!||Maybe we'll get the Enchantress in the third Thor movie| |Jim Lee smiles for the camera||This looks kind of Adventure Time-ish to me, but I| don't know. Whatever it is, it's fun! |This just looks uncomfortable||Excellent Wonder Woman - love this take on the character| |Captain Marvel's fanbase continues to grow||I know not what this is, so let's just call it| the Stuff of Nightmares!! |Teenage Mutant Ninja People doesn't quite sing||More TARDIS cosplay, with bonus HAL 2000| |The level of craftsmanship in Transformers cosplay| continues to astound me, year after year |Welcome to LEGO Gotham| |The cast of DC Nation's "Teen Titans Go!" Loom large||Robin's certainly amused by something|

Stop this gross Wenn, Charley Gallay/Getty Two things are grossing me out. Two women are slumming. JLo’s oversize basecap worn to the side lover Casper Smart tweeted the other day seemingly in the face of criticism from bitches like me about the fact that she’s romancing below her station: Age, status, n opinions of others are irrelevant. Our hearts are endless and our souls infinite........... Our ages are mere reminders of the hours logged on this earth and the precious time remaining. We should all honor our time here by indulging our passion and dreams. So, close your ears and open your hearts; Love and be happy! First of all, no. What is an endless heart? I don’t understand. Why do we insist on mashing words together that make no sense? Also, f-ck off with the “indulging of the passion and the dreams”. Indulging is EXACTLY the problem. There is too much of it. And not enough RESTRAINT. Restraint is criminally underrated. This is why so many people can’t pay off their credit cards. But, you know, because she is a dumbass, JLo thought this sh-t was profound. So she retweeted it. And you know what retweeting means in our day and age? Retweeting means True Love. As I’ve said, so many times now, she’s not just f-cking him on the low, she’s declaring for him in the wide open. Like falling for the first back up dancer who comes along after a marriage is the only move available to her. And then there’s Cameron Diaz. Cameron Diaz hit up Soho House the other night and decided to dry-ride P Diddy. Describes a witness: "Her hair was all crazy, her makeup was smeared and they made out in front of everyone. She was acting like a teenager!" Just a few tables away, Leonardo DiCaprio was holding court. Dry-riding Leo I can accept, even encourage, but dry-riding P Diddy? Click here and picture her legs on either side of it. This is a woman in a desperate state. Dry-riding a has-been after getting dumped by ARod, is a sad, sad situation. Two sad, sad situations. If I were the Dean of the Faculty of Celebrity Studies at a liberal arts university somewhere in New England, this would be a second level course: The Misuse And Waste Of Fame And Actresses With Bad Taste In Men: Analysing The Worst Offenders. Lecture 1: Jennifer Lopez. Lecture 2: Cameron Diaz Lecture 3: Halle Berry.

Lion Fight 11: Cris “Cyborg” vs. Martina Jindrova Confirmed By Lion Fight and D Las Vegas (via press release) LAS VEGAS, NV – Lion Fight Promotions and the D Las Vegas today added a blockbuster women’s matchup to the September 20th LION FIGHT 11 event in announcing that two-time MMA world champion Cris “Cyborg” Justino will take on multiple standup world champion Martina Jindrova. This full rules Muay Thai event will be the first-ever live nationally televised sports event at the Fremont Street Experience. LION FIGHT 11 will broadcast live on AXS TV starting at 7:00 p.m. PT/10:00 p.m. ET. LION FIGHT 11 tickets are on sale now through theD.com and the D Las Vegas box office by calling 702-388-2111. Tickets start at $25 for General Admission (standing room only), $45 for Reserved Seating; $75 for Floor Seating; and $95 for Ringside Seating. Scott Kent, CEO of Lion Fight Promotions said, “As one of the best female fighters in the world, we are thrilled that Cris Cyborg is going to fight full rules Muay Thai and take on World Champion Martina Jindrova on September 20. Both of these fighters are fierce, aggressive strikers who like to end fights. With Cosmo Alexandre vs. Nampon and Kevin Ross vs. Tetsuya Yamato already set for Lion Fight 11, Cyborg vs. Jindrova now fully stacks this card.” Fighting out of San Diego, California, Cris Cyborg Justino is one of the top-ranked female mixed martial artists in the world. With a pro MMA record of 12-1-0-1, she is the former Strikeforce Featherweight Champion and current Invicta FC Featherweight Champion. She has fought in numerous Muay Thai competitions in her native Brazil and is considered one of the most dangerous strikers in the world. “This is a great fight for me at Lion Fight 11, I fought Muay Thai in Brazil and I love competing in this sport,” said Cyborg. “I’m really excited for this fight. I love to fight. I can’t wait to go to Vegas and get in that ring on September 20.” Kent and Lion Fight matchmaker Christine Toledo worked with former UFC light heavyweight champion Tito Ortiz, Cyborg’s manager, to secure this fight. Ortiz expressed confidence and enthusiasm in her return to the Muay Thai ring. “We are excited about the baddest woman on the earth fighting Muay Thai at Lion Fight 11 live on AXS TV in Las Vegas,” said Cyborg’s manager Tito Ortiz, former UFC Champion. “Cris is not only the best, but the most exciting fighter to watch and I’m sure September 20 will be full of excitement.” Fighting out of Brutal Gym in Holland, the 22-year old 5’8” Jindrova has a pro Muay Thai record of 17-5 with three knockouts. Originally, from Kaznejov, Plzensky Kraj, Czech Republic, she is a world champion across four standup fighting organizations. She was a two-time boxing champion in her native Czech Republic. She went undefeated in standup fighting for four years before moving to Holland to train among the world’s best coaches and kickboxers. On September 20 she will fight in the United States against her most accomplished opponent to date. “I know Cyborg is a huge MMA star and this is a big challenge for me to fight an opponent like her,” said Jindrova. “She is very strong with hard punches, kicks and knees. But this is not an MMA, this is Muay Thai and she will be fighting me against my rules. I’m very proud to be on this historic Lion Fight 11 card and am ready to make a great knockout win for the fans.” In Lion Fight 11’s main event Brazilian superstar Cosmo Alexandre takes on two-time WMC Champion and Rajadamnern Stadium Champion Nampon. In the co-main event, American Muay Thai star Kevin Ross will square off against former WBC Muay Thai Japan Champion Tetsuya Yamato. Lion Fight will hold events free and open to the public the week leading up to LION FIGHT 11 including fighter autograph signings, a public press conference and weigh-in event. Details, fighters and more bouts for LION FIGHT 11 will be announced in coming weeks. LION FIGHT 11 will take place at the Third Street Stage at the Fremont Street Experience Friday, Sept. 20. The event opens at 4:00 p.m. PT; first bout starts at 5:00 p.m. PT. AXS TV will present Lion Fight 11 live nationally starting at 10:00 p.m. ET/7:00 p.m. PT

Five myths about Africa Matt Damon, listen up: After five years of covering Africa, our departing correspondent tells how his perceptions have changed about a complex continent, including why some Africans resent celebrity visits. Monitor staff file photo Johannesburg, South Africa Here we were, stuck axle-deep on a muddy road in the eastern part of the Democratic Republic of Congo, after a very impressive midafternoon rainstorm. Ten miles behind us was a small village with a deep hole in the ground where the village men would dig up chunks of tin and sell them to traveling salesmen. This was the last village under government control before the tin trade fell into the hands of a genocidal rebel group called the Democratic Forces for the Liberation of Rwanda. So, with dusk falling, the rain starting, and a mile or two to walk to the closest friendly village, there was nothing to do but get on the cellphone to inform my wife I wouldn't make it to the hotel that night in Bukavu. Later, in the village, my colleague Stephanie Nolen of the Toronto Globe and Mail would send an e-mail from her BlackBerry to her paper's editors, explaining that she was safe. Welcome to the jungle. Now complete with 3G mobile phone connectivity. I'm not sure what I expected when I arrived on the African continent. Having lived in India for five-plus years, I knew enough to distrust the "white man's burden" perspective of British colonialism, or the quaint "noble savage" messages embedded in Belgian comics like Tin-Tin. Instead, I buried myself in the African fiction of Chinua Achebe and the plays of Athol Fugard, and hoped that I would quickly find people in our new home in Johannesburg, South Africa, to guide us toward a real sense of what Africa was all about. Five years later, having served as Africa bureau chief of The Christian Science Monitor – living in the upper-middle-class comforts of Johannesburg and traveling to the squatter camps of Chad, the artisanal tin mines of Congo, the deserts of Timbuktu – I have plenty of stories to tell. But while I have seen the same violence you read about in the news, and share the same concerns others have about the state of governance here, I remain convinced that much coverage of Africa remains needlessly tilted toward the negative. Nobody I know here denies the problems of this continent, but too few outsiders hear about the positive strides being made and the people who are making them. Think of all the images one gets of Africa – starving babies, child soldiers, incessant conflict, unapologetic greed. Certainly every one of these images is based in fact. Is there starvation in Africa? Ask someone who has visited the Horn of Africa, with its horrific drought and its decades-long civil war. Is there violence? Ask a Tutsi woman who has lost her entire family in the 1994 genocide; or ask a Congolese family whose male children have been kidnapped as child soldiers by the Lord's Resistance Army. But these images don't tell the whole story of Africa. Here are a few of the more common misperceptions: Africa is poor; Africa is violent; Africa is technologically backward; Africa needs "our" help; and my favorite, Africa is a country. Add those all up, and you start to wonder why people live here. Repeat them out loud, and you might annoy some of your African friends. Report on them, year after year, and you can spend a very fruitful career in Nairobi or Dakar, in Cairo or Johannesburg. If you never look for Africans who are perfectly aware of these problems and who are actively searching for solutions, well, it's almost certain that you'll never find them. Yet those people do exist. Here are some of the people I met along the way, who changed how I saw Africa. 1. Africa is 'poor' I met Olga Thimbela and Pontsho Monamodi in their tin-shack dwelling in an informal settlement outside Roodepoort almost four years ago. On paper, they were among the poorest people in South Africa. In a good month, Pontsho earned 1,400 rand (about $200) working as a security guard, protecting the homes of middle-class South Africans. Olga had just given up a part-time job as a housecleaner in many of those homes to look after her children. Considering that she had eight to look after – two of her own, and six others who were the orphaned children of relatives who had died of AIDS – Olga had work enough to manage at home. Olga and Pontsho are part of a massive demographic trend in South Africa, the surviving relatives who must care for the children of the estimated 2 million South Africans who have died of AIDS in the past decade and a half. It's a disease that has disproportionately struck the poorest of the poor, those who must travel long distances to seek work and those who often have little information on the dangers of unprotected sex. And it's a disease that has massive economic and social consequences for a nation that should be building for the future, but instead is struggling with looking after an entire generation of children – as many as 1.4 million orphans in all. The striking part of Olga and Pontsho's story is that theirs is a common narrative. More than a quarter of all South Africans are jobless, according to official statistics. More than 65 percent live on less than 550 rand ($75) per month, or $2.60 a day. And yet, the gross domestic product, on a per capita basis, is $10,700. What those figures suggest is that South Africa isn't a poor country: It's a country where the wealth is concentrated in a few hands. Sitting in Olga and Pontsho's home – with a throng of young faces staring at me – I was dumbfounded by their generosity. Many middle-class families give to charity, perhaps with a check to Oxfam or by volunteering to build homes for Habitat for Humanity. But when charity becomes a matter of daily life, it is taking the concept to another level. South Africans call it ubuntu, a Zulu word that means "humanness." In the philosophy of ubuntu, you are only a human being if you are connected to and helping out other human beings. For Olga, ubuntu was as natural as breathing. "I do a lot of stuff for my kids and my sister's kids because I didn't want to see these kids to go to eat in the dustbin or to go to steal," Olga told me, her voice shaking with emotion. But she trusted then that doing good for others wouldn't cause her own family harm. Bulelwa, a seventh-grader and the daughter of Olga's aunt, said that Olga "give us equal food. She doesn't call us names. She treat us equal like her children." Olga's choice took her on a very bumpy road during the four years that the Monitor followed her. With relatives pestering her for a portion of the government-provided $90 monthly child-welfare grants, her marriage with Pontsho broke up. Little Bulelwa rebelled and became pregnant. In our last meeting, last year, Olga blamed herself for taking on so much responsibility. But getting to know Olga a bit over the years, I can't imagine her not shouldering such a great burden. It wasn't poverty that tore up Olga's family: It was greed by family members. Today, Olga blames generosity for her downfall. But that generosity speaks of a cultural wealth that is still deeply felt in most South African communities. The word ubuntu has been so often used by politicians that it is fast losing its credit, but as long as the impulse remains, South Africans will have a foundation stone for building a new, more equitable South Africa. 2. Africa is 'violent' On a sunny March morning in 2007, I was robbed at gunpoint. I had just gone to our local bank in Johannesburg to withdraw a large amount of money ahead of a trip to Kenya and Somalia. From the bank, I went to a pet store (we had just gotten a parrot) a few blocks down the road. In the parking lot, I found myself facing a young man with a gun, and behind him several other men, who proceeded to shout at me and look in my car. "Where is the money?" the leader yelled. "What money?" I asked. They were insistent. "Where is the money?" I pointed at the glove compartment, where I had stowed the cash in an envelope. They grabbed it, made me empty my pockets, jumped in their car, and fled. I sank to the ground, shocked but unharmed. Several things are important in this incident. One, it occurred just six months after I had arrived, and it made a strong impression on me about South Africa's crime problem. Two, it was definitely not random. Police later determined that a bank employee had tipped off the robbers after I had shown up earlier without proper ID and promised I would return in an hour to complete the withdrawal. Three, the robbers never touched me. In that sense, it was emblematic: For every shootout that ends in a death, for every carjacking or "smash and grab," for every home invasion that shocks the nation – and there are plenty of those – many more criminal acts are professional, dispassionate, strictly business, like this one. It is hardly surprising that crime exists in South Africa. This is, after all, a country with the highest disparity between rich and poor, where multimillion-dollar homes lie within sight of the tin shacks of settlements like Diepsloot and Alexandra townships. What is surprising is that more crime doesn't occur. Friends of ours from Mexico City and Rio de Janeiro have told us that crime here is nothing compared with what they have back home. Violence on a broader scale in Africa is more complicated than it is often portrayed as well. The places where the most violence occurs are not necessarily big cities like Johannesburg or Lagos, Nigeria, but full-force war zones like Sudan's Darfur region (where perhaps 300,000 have died since 2005) or the Democratic Republic of Congo (where an estimated 5 million have died in multiple wars since 1996). Even then, the highest death tolls have come not from war wounds, but rather the starvation or diseases that result from uprooting families and moving them hundreds of miles to refugee camps. Does the violence of these wars make Africa a violent place? Not any more, necessarily, than the violence of the Bosnian-Serb conflict of the early 1990s made Europe a dangerous place. Wars in Africa are about the same sort of stuff that they are about on other continents: power. And just as there are warmongers in every society, so, too, there are peacemakers. In Kenya, when politicians were busy whipping up ethnic hatred among rival groups after the botched presidential elections of December 2007, there were church leaders, human rights activists, youth leaders, and others who risked their lives to appeal for calm. Hezron Masitsa was one of those young men. As a practicing Quaker and a trained mediator at the Alternatives to Violence Program in Nairobi, Hezron had helped Christian and Muslim communities along the Kenyan coast rebuild trust after the Sept. 11 attacks in the United States soured relations between the two communities. At the time, Christian pastors were telling their flocks that all Muslims were terrorists, and Muslim preachers told their followers that Christians were determined to destroy Islam. To get the communities talking again, Hezron invited elders of each side to attend a meeting, and then made them participate in "silly games" and trust-building exercises. When I met him in mid-January 2008, he had hopes of doing the same thing in Kenya's Rift Valley. But he knew he had to wait until tempers cooled. Some 800 Kenyans had just been killed in postelection violence, and the murderous wave was still spreading. "The emotions are very high right now, so first we need to talk with people, find out what they are feeling, and create a space where people can speak freely," Hezron told me at the Quaker church he attends. He said that when violence was occurring, it was too difficult to get local elders to sit down with their perceived enemies. But when it ebbed, Hezron would be there, creating a place for enemies to air their views and to establish the conditions once more for peaceful coexistence. "It's not easy; you can't expect people to go back to normal when all this is going on," Hezron said with a sigh. "We need to build trust in one another again." If you meet one Hezron Masitsa, you'll think he's an anomaly. But spend enough time as a reporter in Africa, and you'll find a peacemaker like him in nearly every community. It may be a doctor like Denis Mukwege setting up a gynecological hospital for the rape victims of eastern Congo. It may be a Wangari Maathai planting greenbelts to prevent the desertification of northern Kenya. It may be an aid worker like Emmanuel Uwurukundo, who lost much of his family during the Rwandan genocide and decided his survival gave him an obligation to help others, such as Darfuri refugees in camps in eastern Chad. Pessimism is terribly fashionable these days, but optimism tells me there's a reason societies produce peacemakers, and they should be given as much attention as the warmongers. 3. Africa needs our help It wasn't long after my arrival here that I noticed a steady stream of celebrities to Africa. Oprah Winfrey would come to check on her boarding school for girls outside Johannesburg. Former President Bill Clinton would come to Nairobi. George Clooney and Mia Farrow would visit the Darfur refugee camps in eastern Chad. Angelina Jolie would visit refugee camps in eastern Congo, and later give birth to a child in Namibia. Madonna would come, twice, to adopt children, and to set up an Oprah-style school for underprivileged girls. Some of these celebrities had studied their material, as Matt Damon appears to have done on drinking water projects in Zambia. Others – let's just leave them unnamed – had not. Yet the derision of many Africans toward these famous outsiders was often the same, regardless. "Oh, look," one South African friend muttered to me one day, seeing the perfect jaw line of a Hollywood star in a magazine article about that person's activism in Africa. "Another white Tarzan has come to save us benighted Africans." It has taken me a while to get to the root of this ridicule. Is it because these famous politicians, supermodels, or box-office giants are making a big deal about a small problem? No, certainly genocide in Rwanda and war crimes in Darfur are matters that deserve attention. Is it that they are using these good acts to burnish their image? Maybe so. But the real reason has to do with the perception that Africa is incapable of solving its own problems. Everyone needs a little assistance during a natural disaster, of course. In the ongoing drought in parts of Somalia, Ethiopia, and northern Kenya, food aid will keep millions of people alive who might otherwise die. During the Japanese earthquake and tsunami, and during the aftermath of hurricane Katrina in the US, even the world's richest nations were willing to take assistance from other nations, and Africa is no exception. But when it comes to long-term development – taking a very poor and underdeveloped nation like Rwanda, for instance, and turning it into a high-tech oriented information center like Singapore – many African politicians and intellectuals say they want the West to butt out. Western aid comes with strings attached, including lengthy lectures on the merits of democracy, good governance, and human rights. Many Africans are tempted to interrupt this sermonizing with a question: "What about Guantánamo Bay?" Across the continent, a new generation of leaders is starting to put its growing self-confidence into action by rejecting outside assistance, for both noble and ignoble reasons. Prominent among them was former South African President Thabo Mbeki, whose mantra of "African solutions for African problems," guided everything from the country's disdain for European-led peacekeeping missions to American-funded drugs for AIDS treatment. More recently, Malawi's president, Bingu Mutharika, decided to forgo £22 million in British development aid this year, rather than comply with strict British rules for reforming its economy and imposing good-governance measures. Kenyan leaders, angry that fellow politicians might face trial for international human rights charges from the postelection violence, have urged other African nations to join them in boycotting any future cooperation with the International Criminal Court at The Hague. And then there's Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe, who tends to tell his Western critics to simply "go hang." Is all this just members of a "Dictator's Club" protecting their own interests? Sure. But what about those African intellectuals who are critical of their leaders, yet still insist that Africans need to develop their own ability to solve problems? Last year, I got to meet the son of a man whose influence ripples far beyond his native South Africa. Nkosinathi Biko, the son of slain black-consciousness leader Steve Biko, has tailored his father's message of pride in African heritage to the post-apartheid age. It's a time when young black schoolchildren know they have political freedom, he told me, but when many young black South Africans still lack confidence in their culture. Being proud of who you are, he said, is key for black South Africans to find their place in their world. I found that pride in extreme places, like the Touloum refugee camp in eastern Chad. Having talked to a Darfuri woman displaced from her farm in Sudan, photographer Melanie Stetson Freeman and I were preparing to leave when the refugee woman insisted on giving us tea and biscuits. Her poverty was no excuse, in her mind, for not offering typical Darfuri hospitality for guests from afar. 4. Africa is 'backward' If it is difficult to turn Steve Biko's vision of black consciousness – confident Africans doing things for themselves – into action, it isn't because Africans lack the motivation or inventiveness to do so. In Kenya, I've seen people use their cellphones for banking, an idea just gaining a foothold in many Western countries. On payday, they take their money to a local cellphone shop, buy a few scratch cards for airtime, and send the code numbers to their relatives by text message. Their family members, in turn, either use the airtime or give that code to their own shopkeeper, who gives them cash. In fact, it was this common practice of using airtime to send money that attracted the attention of the cellphone company Safaricom and the British Department for International Development to launch a new service called M-PESA. Today, M-PESA serves effectively as one of Kenya's largest banks, with some 75 percent of the 9.5 million M-PESA account holders using it to store money, according to a study by the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. The project worked so well, it has now spread to South Africa – a country with a world-class banking sector – and plans are afoot to take it elsewhere in Africa. Please note: It was ordinary Kenyans, not Safaricom, who started cellphone banking, a business that is rapidly giving traditional banks and money-transfer companies like Western Union a run for their wired money. It's a fact that I keep in my head whenever I hear pessimistic Africans (especially white South Africans) sigh and tell me, "This is Africa." It sounds like an obvious statement of geography. It is meant as a catchall excuse for inefficiency. What did you expect? This is Africa. Yet I saw ingenuity where others saw backwardness. In a refugee camp in Chad for the exiles of Sudan's Darfur region, I watched women use handmade foil-and-cardboard solar stoves to cook meals. In Malawi, I read about a boy who had built his own windmill to generate electricity in his rural home. In Mali, I saw farmers use ancient irrigation systems to divert water from the Niger River into rice fields they had carved out of the desert, and in Ethiopia I met farmers who used cellphones to find the best price for their crops. In the end, we all look at the same evidence and take away lessons that we want to learn. What Africa lacks is not inventiveness but rather effective governance. When Africans get the leaders who will do the job of making the power plants, water systems, roads, and schools actually work, then you'll see the beginnings of an African renaissance. 5. Africa is a country The young Ethiopian office workers ripped up pieces of spongy injera bread and mopped up the sauce from a spicy grilled meat dish called "tibs." They were laughing, flirting, feeding each other, and telling me about the dating scene in Ethiopia. "I couldn't marry an African man," said one pretty Ethiopian young lady, flatly, referring to any male outside Ethiopia, and other women at the table nodded their heads. The young lady began to list her reasons why, and I won't list them here, because if a white person said them, he would be accused of racism. What stunned me, though, was her use of the word "African." On my map of Africa, the country of Ethiopia is clearly attached to the continent. So why did these Ethiopians not consider themselves to be Africans? The experience evoked a kind of déjà vu. In Johannesburg, my South African neighbors often would ask me, the exotic foreign correspondent, if I would be traveling "to Africa" anytime soon. When this sort of thing happens to me often enough, I start to doubt my understanding of the word "Africa." Whether we like to admit it or not, non-Africans have a picture in their mind of Africa, one that looks remarkably like the film images of "Out of Africa." But the continent is, in fact, divided up into 54 countries, along lines that have remained largely unchanged since a group of European kings and prime ministers sketched boundaries at a conference in Berlin in 1885. But there is a temptation to speak of Africans as if they are one people, with a common history, with common cultures and traits and beliefs. And it just isn't so. Encouraging this view are intellectual giants of the anticolonial period such as Marcus Garvey, Kwame Nkrumah, and Leopold Senghor. Fighting against the colonial method of divide and rule, Mr. Garvey urged Africans to embrace a broader African unity. Senegalese poet Mr. Senghor wrote lengthy books about a Pan-African culture, common among the various colonial peoples, and called this sense of Africanness "Negritude." But after independence, many people embraced an identity much closer to home. In Bulawayo, Zimbabwe, activists told me the source of their problems was the domination of the Shona-speaking tribes loyal to Mr. Mugabe, who had ruled Zimbabwe since independence in 1980. They told me about a brutal military operation called "Gukuruhundi" against Ndebele-speaking people, in which an estimated 20,000 civilians were killed. "We can't even think of ourselves as Zimbabwean," said one activist from a local federalist party that was seeking autonomy for the Matabeleland region that includes Bulawayo. "We are Ndebeles, and we have to look out for our own interest and govern our own affairs. This country you call Zimbabwe will never work." It's a sentiment that the newly independent nation of South Sudan would sympathize with, now that they have freed themselves from the Arab-dominated nation of Sudan; and that Somalilanders would appreciate as well, as they declare unilateral secession from the Somali government in Mogadishu. But it's a sentiment that policymakers in Washington and Paris and London – and aid workers and celebrity fundraisers should keep in mind. This month, when Fast Company magazine ran a story about Matt Damon's worthy efforts to fund clean-drinking water projects in Zambia, the chattering class known as Twitter murmured over the prevailing stereotype of Africa. Reading the headline – "Can Matt Damon Bring Clean Water to Africa?" – one person tweeted sarcastically: "Really? All of it?"

Everyone knows the story of Lincoln's presidency and his fight to preserve the Union. But what they don't tell you in school is that Honest Abe was really a skilled vampire killer. When author Seth Grahame-Smith discovered Lincoln's secret journal, he realized the importance of telling the true story of the Civil War and Lincoln's personal mission of vengeance. Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter reveals the facts behind Abe's skill with an ax and the role vampires played in the founding of America. The movie, starring Benjamin Walker, Rufus Sewell and Dominic Cooper, opens in theaters on June 22. BONUS READ: If you like paranormal mashups, try Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, also by Seth Grahame-Smith. College professor Harry Hicks is forced to give up his teaching position in the aftermath of a love affair that ended in scandal, divorce and separation from his daughter. He moves to Paris to start a new life, finding a job as a night guard for a questionable establishment. The only joy Harry finds in the City of Lights is with the mysterious Margit, a widow who lures him in yet remains guarded. Only after he's entangled himself in the relationship, does Harry start to realize that a series of suspicious deaths can be traced back to him. Douglas Kennedy's The Woman in the Fifth is a psychological thriller with noir elements. The movie, starring Ethan Hawke and Kristin Scott Thomas, opens in theaters on June 15. BONUS READ: If you like dark, spooky mysteries, try Carol Goodman's The Ghost Orchid. Down and out Georges Duroy has little going for him but good looks and the desire to climb to the top of the social scene. In Paris of the 1870s, Georges learns the way to success is through the bedroom door. He thus sets out to seduce the wives and daughters of the rich and famous, rising from a homeless ex-soldier to one of the most desired young men of the city. Betrayals, manipulation and secrets will either sustain him or drive him to ruin. Guy de Mauspassant's novel Bel Ami (published in 1885) takes a cynical look at marriage, the upper classes and faithfulness in late-19th-century France. The movie, starring Robert Pattinson, Uma Thurman, and Kristin Scott Thomas, opens in theaters on June 8. BONUS READ: For another look at 19th-century French life and morals, read Gustave Flaubert's Madame Bovary (published in 1856). Craig Johnson's Walt Longmire mystery series starts with The Cold Dish, which introduces us to Wyoming sheriff Longmire and his friend Henry Standing Bear. In addition to solving the murder of Cody Pritchard, a much-disliked ex-football star, Longmire is struggling to move on after his wife's death and to restore contact with his grown daughter. The series, currently eight books long, consists of tightly written police procedurals that feature the Wyoming landscape and culture. Strong characterization and relevant themes make the Walt Longmire books must-reads. The television series, starring Robert Taylor and Lou Diamond Phillips, premiers on A&E the first week of June. Check your local listings for dates and times. BONUS READ: If you like mysteries that feature sheriffs and Native Americans, try the Cork O'Connor series by William Kent Krueger, starting with Iron Lake. Charlaine Harris's Southern Vampire series, featuring Sookie Stackhouse, is set in contemporary Louisiana. In the first book, Dead until Dark, we learn that vampires have come out of hiding thanks to the invention of True Blood, a synthetic blood that can sustain the undead. When Sookie, a waitress with mind-reading abilities, meets her first vampire, Bill Compton, it's love at first sight. In the course of the series, Sookie meets other vampires and a host of supernatural beings. Harris keeps the series fresh by introducing new characters and allowing Sookie to grow and change. The HBO series True Blood, now in its fifth season, stars Anna Paquin, Alexander Skarsgard and Stephen Moyer. Check your local listings for dates and times. BONUS READ: If you're an urban fantasy fan, try Kim Harrison's Rachel Morgan series, starting with Dead Witch Walking. And you'll see personalized content just for you whenever you click the My Feed . SheKnows is making some changes!

Skip to comments.Dick Morris: Obama is going to lose big Posted on 04/05/2012 9:01:40 AM PDT by varmintman Dick Morris' "Lunch" video this morning involves a claim that a realistic reading of today's polls indicate that Romney (or anybody else other than Rick Santorum more or less) will beat Obama very badly. The basic gist is that Obama needs to be over 50% among likely voters at this point to break even and the fact of his being no better than around 45 spells wipeout in November since the undecideds almost never break for an incumbent under such circumstances. Morris notes that it's as if marriages were five year contracts with options to renew and somebody were to ask your husband or wife at year four if they were planning on renewing, and they said they'd have to think about it... When is the last time Morris was right about anything? Uh Oh.... Dicky boy is often very wrong in his predictions.... Last time I checked. WTH data is Morris looking at? Morris predictions are worthless. Tell me which of Kerry's states, if any, he's not going to carry. How does he lose them? What groups fade away. Give me specifics. But in this case, we're talking about many millions of very dull sheeple who are quite willing to receive abuse so long as they get an occasional freebie thrown their way. “Uh Oh.... Dicky boy is often very wrong in his predictions.... Yeah. This is what worries me about hearing something Morris says that I agree with. I DO think (most of the time) that 0bama loses big. Who is Obama going to run against then? Romney sure the he!! isn’t going to beat Obama! I agree. In firming up his base, Obama is showing his true nature and alienating moderate middle-class voters. Moreover, many people who say they are leaning to Obama are just giving the politically correct answer, and in the privacy of the voting booth will pull the other lever. It could be comparable to 1980, IMHO. It doesn’t matter how bad Romney is, people will be voting against the incumbent. Oh no. Say it isn’t so, Dick. Many things can happen between now and November. That’s an entire baseball season + the World Series. Mitt is going in with his obvious problems: low support from Conservatives, RomneyCare and his magic underwear. Obama is dragged down by ObamaCare, high gas prices, high unemployment, and trillions in new debt. It’s really a question of who reeks less and how many dead people vote in blue states. The American voter can’t really be trusted to decide based on what is true or prudent. today’s rasmussen tracking poll (as shown on rcp) shows Romney over obama by 2 nationally, and Santorum under obama by 2 nationally. Pretty close election either way. At this stage, today, Romney is polling slightly better than Santorum, but Santorum is very much within range. Romney does not have a lock in the “electability” argument with TODAYS NUMBERS. But he does have an advantage over Santorum. (I am not advocating anything by the above. I’m just reporting the facts and drawing some basic conclusions. personally, I think obama is the favorite for November....but I would love to be wrong!) Exactly. Obama has 250+ all but guaranteed EVs before the first vote is recorded. He gets all of Kerry's states, plus NV and probably CO. Romney has about 160. All else will be up for grabs. If gas prices stay high he will lose many more states, especially rural Midwest states like MI. Bingo. Most don't have a clue of why certain issues are vital to this country. They keep a narrow view on what puts a couple more $ in their pocket, along with their favorite social cause and focus on those. So I don’t have to feel bad about not voting for the RINO in November? The city of Destroyed will have to depopulate a whole lot more between now and November for Romney to have a shot of winning MI. "Obama's Stash" is very popular there. Just what Obama has done on gas prices should make him toast. But even that is not needed. Obama has spit in the face of the white folks that got him elected. A tiny few will be back voting for him due to white guilt but because Obama has divided the races on purpose and basically said those white folks are racists they won't be voting for him again. Obama, simply put, is a dumbass. He had the greatest opportunity in American history to bring the country together. Instead he has been a punk and a puke. A thug. Obama has been the punk in the hooded jacket walking very closly behind us on a dark street. This is going to cost him dearly. There is a long list of other things that will contribute to his being defeated in a landslide. And it will be a very big landslide. A tsunami that voter fraud will not be able to overcome. No, I don't need Morris to tell me this. I knew it already. I'm voting for a conservative. I wouldn’t take the chance if I were y’all. I hope Dick Morris is right, but what’s his record. Vote against Obama. I agree with the Toe Sucker, but for different reasons. In the Trayvon Martin case, Obama has lit the fuse on a nationwide race war. Any voter who is not black realizes that he or she is the target of that war, and will be in serious trouble if the leader of that war were to gain a second term. So they’ll run screaming to the GOP and vote for a yellow dog, a warm bucket of spit, or perhaps even Mitt Romney. It’s the Southern Strategy, more wildly successful than Nixon ever dreamed it could be. My thoughts exactly. From your lips to God's ears!! Comrade "O" has got to GO!!! It is being said George Soros likes Romney. That means Romney will change nothing Obama has done and will make things worse. We need to elect someone else. Anyone other than Obama and Romney. i think obama is the favorite...but, I also think what you say here could end up being relevant: “Any voter who is not black realizes that he or she is the target of that war, and will be in serious trouble if the leader of that war were to gain a second term.” obviously that sentiment will not show up clearly in polling anytime soon...SO...there IS a possibility that come mid October, obama could start sinking and it could end up a blow out, ala 1980. That “could” happen. (Note to Romney: if you end up winning big, it doesn’t mean you are Reagan. It just means that obama is worse than Carter). Based off the Kerry states won, Obama will struggle with PA and WI. We need to worry about VA, NC, and FL. Not sure about NV, NM, and CO going Red. If we keep those 3 and PA or WI flips + the others hold steady, even Willard can win. Not too big an “if” IMHO. The sentiment is out there now. Wait until they start burning Detroit, Philly and Baltimore this summer. Not to mention the neo-hippie antics of Occupy Wall Street. I still chuckle about Morris and his toe sucking incident. The woman who was involved was not only from Pittsburgh....she was from the exact neighborhood in Pittsburgh were, when I was a kid, you used to go cruising if your intentions were to meet a girl like that. I take it he’s not accounting for the third-party spoiler by which Obama can win with a plurality. Did that last time. And dangit.. he still won. One thing I really appreciate about the FR experience is the centralization of valuable, pertinent information. At one time, admittedly out of ignorance, I was 50/50 about Romney. But the wealth of information that has since flowed in here has convinced me that beneath that carefully arranged wool disguise is a liberal wolf anxious to spring out into full view. The man is full of more sh*t than a Christmas goose, and those conservative-flavored soundbites are simply rehearsed garbage. I'm convinced. Voting for Romney is one.. BAD.. idea. “Romney sure the he!! isnt going to beat Obama!” Remember how we had that hope back in 2008, i.e. the hoped-for, but nonexistent "Bradley Effect?" That ought to be one of those mindless chants i.e. “One-two-three-fo’ comrade “O” has got to go!” yet.....obama is still, at this time, if you go state by state, the odds on favorite: The crabby “principled” Freepers and the Soros brigade have shown up. They enthusiastically agree that we are going to get four more years of Our Beloved Leader. I can’t go along with that. As a doctor, I do not first kill my patient in order to save him. Obama is killing America, aided and abetted by communists and Freepers. That’s unadulterated bullshit! How do you fix your mouth to speak of Freepers that way! How old are? You're not seriously comparing one of the greatest politicians, communicators and Presidents of all-time to one of the weakest potential Presidential nominees in history, Mitt Romney, are you? Or MAYBE you are really thinking "obama is a big loser..." all the time? I don't care! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! Mitt Romney is the Nidal Hasan of the Republican party, someone on the liberal side of the war ready to destroy as much of conservatism as possible. in the true tradition of free republic....where we are compelled to prove how conservative we are but implicitly if not explicitly advocating obama’s re-election. But, Romney isn't going to do the same thing and set back the conservative movement at the same time? Romney will leave the Republican party in worse shape than George W. Bush did. And, we'll get Romneycare, new taxes and, perhaps, another David Souter before he is done. I prefer “Welcome to FR! Come for the analysis, stay for the knee-jerking!” Obama’s going to cream romney so bad the GOP will completely implode and vanish by 2016, but it won’t make a difference since this will be the last real election. Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Marriage has health benefits. "A study done by Duke University Medical Center revealed that people who were never married were more than twice as likely to die early as people in a long-term relationship." More likely than not, early deaths amongst single people rather than married individuals are caused by loneliness, stress, and a lack of fulfillment or lack of love. Married people are able to adapt better to health setbacks. Marriage protects children. Kids with parents that are not married or are in torn relationships are much more likely than other kids to slip into poverty, become victims of child abuse, fail at school and drop out, use illegal drugs, launch into premature sexual activity, become unwed teen mothers, divorce, commit suicide and experience other signs of mental illness. Kids often times exhibit the same steps as their parents/ people they live with. Marriage allows for one of the greatest support systems that life can offer. Not only mental stability and support, but marriage also is a means for physical and financial support. The foundation is built on two rather than one. Money and other benefits are joint. Also, knowing that someone is by your side is a motivational drive for both people. Married couples have better sex lives. Mental and physical intimacy among married couples are more than great. Many people believe married couples sex lives are routine and boring or even non existent, although it's the total opposite. "It gets better as time progresses as love advances." Marriage is safer. Marriage lowers the risk of domestic violence, for woman and men. A 1994 report given by the Justice Department concluded that two-thirds of acts of violence against women committed by intimate partners were not committed by husbands but by boyfriends. Non married couples are more likely to end in violence.

BC: Kozak Family Memories Love you and God bless FC: Our Mother Mary | "Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." | June 23,1917 to Jan 16, 2010 | Saint Mary 1: Mary Elizabeth Swantek to Michael William Kozak Married June 14th ,1949 | They had 5 children Kathleen Marie, John Michael, Alan Michael, William Kenneth, & Victoria Marie 2: Mother | Marriage of Anna Kraynak to Michael Kozak They had 8 children Margaret(Hodos) Michael Agnes(Lechwar) Joseph Helen(Giba) Anne(Banyots) Larry & Theresa(Balakoff) 3: Marriage of Anna Kubofchik to John Swantek They had 3 girls Mary(Kozak) Nikki(Spirko) & Margaret(Leschinsky) 6: When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses. ~Joyce Brothers | Sisters Mary Margaret & Nikki 10: Look how happy they are. Mom and Pop did hug 13: Pop March 14th, 1917 to July 1st, 1975 | Pop loved his pipe 16: Those were the days, life was so simple then 17: Mom and Billy 1952 | Mom having a baby 18: Mom, Jack and Alan | Jack, Alan, Kitchie 19: Around the table family moment 20: 3 Brothers Jack, Billy, & Alan Handsome aren't they 21: Alan,Tommy,Margie,Pop and Jack. Margie was May Queen 22: Pop and Uncle Gumpy giving all the kids a horsey back ride. Having fun 23: Legacy | Fun 24: Our most treasured family heirlooms are our sweet family memories. | 301 Park Drive Sitting on the porch relaxing 25: Vicki on Graduation day 1975 | First Communion 27: Marriage of Kathleen to Robert Biasella Sept 14,1963 They had 2 children Christopher & Kelly (Boehm) 28: Marriage of Marie (Frazzini) to John Kozak Aug 24th, 1963 They Had 3 Children Jack, Susan(Carney) & Nancy (Reali) 29: Marriage of Lydia(Profanchik) to Alan Kozak They had 5 children Michelle(Zajac),Michael, Melissa(Konnerth), Melanie(Sztary) & Mary | Oct 22nd,1967 30: Marriage of Karen (Kotouch) to William Kozak 3-31-73 They had 2 children Samantha (Billig) & Steven 32: Words of Love and Wisdom 33: We sure do miss them 35: Marriage of Victoria Kozak to Antonio Gutierrez Sept 23rd, 1989 Tony gave to Vicky 4 children Antonio Jr.,Hildo, Anjelica & Jasmine 36: Mom & Vicki Nice family pic by Pop's Tulip tree that he loved 37: Grandma and Mary having a Hug | Having a mother daughter moment 38: Treasured Moments 39: When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses. ~Joyce Brothers 40: Pop was hoping someone wanted to play cards 41: Still asking to get a card game going 42: Jack, Susan, Chris Michael, Mary, Missy Nancy, Kelly, Michelle Melanie, Steven, Sam | All the grandchildren loved playing on the steps at Grandma's 43: Susan, Chris, Jack Michelle, Nancy,Michael, Sam, Mel, Missy, Kelly Steven & Mary 46: Our most treasured family heirlooms are our sweet family memories. | Kozak & Leschinsky Reunion 47: Check out those Sunglasses 49: Mom was always looking for her Favorite gift. Any guesses? Helped her sleep at night 50: Nice leisure suit Jack 52: Saint Mary 53: Mom and Steven on his 2nd birthday He sure did love his grammy | Mom loved to gossip 55: Memories bring back moments that mean the most to all of us. "Family is the most important" 56: One of many summertime get-togethers 57: Christmas was a time for Family Photos 58: Great Grandparents | Check how may times Mom wore the same dress, and the black flowered top 59: Look! A Blue Dress 60: Mom with all her children 61: Susan & Cierra | Michelle loved her grandma She never missed a Sunday 63: I Love You, "Dearie" | She is so Beautiful 64: Sam loved her Grammie 66: Big Grandma , we miss you very much. Love, Jarrrod and Jacob 67: Mom always brought smiles to the kids faces 69: They loved there mom very much | Kozak Family Legacy 70: Easter at Alan and Lydia's Mom with her great grandchildren Alyson, Kayla, Peyton, Brandon, Dillon, Emma, Adam, and Aiden 71: Let me help you St Mary "I Love you more" | Every beautiful part of our lives as a family is a reflection of the Mother we were blessed with 72: Mom's 90th Birthday 73: Our Family History | She's so Huggable ! We love you Grammy 74: Steve, Lincoln and Jarrod visiting Big Grandma 75: Steve and Sam remembering how they baked cookies after school with grandma 76: The time we shared with our mother was the greatest gift we could ever have.We miss you so much. You will always be in our hearts and soul. We will love you forever 78: Here are some of Mom's favorite reciepes written in her own writing 79: Anyone willing to give these a try, you know she left something out to keep us guessing | Krepe was one of my favorite's 80: This was a favorite for all of us, it always made the best frosting. One hint she gave,shake the milk and flour in a (cool whip container) for no lumps 81: Mom loved to bake and cook, some of her other favorites she made were: Kolachie, Pie dough cookies(grandkids favorite), her chocolate cake with bitter chocolate drizzled on top, the infamous 7 layer cookie(everyone talks about the drizzle icing on top), apple dumplings, perogies, pizza(this was one of Bob's favorites), her wonderful cream filled donuts, choclate chip cookies. Jack's favorite was her stuffed veal breast. Mom's beef soup and homemade dumplings was the best. 82: This was Mom's favorite bible verse PSALM 23 The Lord is my shepherd;I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul:. he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 83: Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil: my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Mom's Favorite Hymn: How Great Thou Art 84: In Memory of Mary Kozak Our Mother, Saint Mary Today we are gathered here in God's presence to celebrate the life of Mary, Our Mother, Grandmother, and Great-Grandmother. I did not say Mother-in-law, because mom loved Bob, Marie, Lydia, Tony and me as one of her own. She loved us as her sons and daughters, Kathy, John, Alan, Billy and Vicki. She gave all of us love, compassion, strength and our faith. We were not in-laws, we were her children. When I came into this family 40yrs ago I was 16. Mom opened her arms and her heart to me. Loving her was so easy; it came so naturally, without hesitation. She touched my very soul. Mom had something about her,everyone who knew her just loved her. 85: The Kozak family has been the closest family I have ever known. Family is very important to all of them. This was instilled in them from their Mother "Mary, St Mary" as Billy always called her. To them she was a saint. God gave her to us to cherish, and believe me she was and always will be. When you think of an angel, thats her. All 12 of her grandchildren have been dedicated to her, everyone made time for her. There could be no other "Grammie" or as Jarrod called her "Big Grandma". The loved poured out to her from all of them so unconditionally, because she was a gift from heaven. On Sundays when we would congregate at her house in the basement to have coffee and some of her delicious baked goods. The grandchildren were always hoping that Grandma would bake their favorite. 86: Everyone loved her cupcakes, Krepe, pie dough cookies with the drizzle icing and especially her homemade Ice Tea, no one could make it like her, believe me I tried. Steve and Sam always said, " It's not as good as grandmas." Let's not forget her chocolate chip cookies. the kids favorite time was baking them with her after school and eating the cookie dough. As the years went by the grandchildren got older, married, and had children of their own. "Grammie" was still an important part of their lives. Always visiting and calling her, telling her stories about their own children, making her laugh. Mom loved being able to have this time with all of them, especially the stories. Mom would always let the next visitor know what was going on with the family, nothing passed her by. Just ask Grandma, she knows. 87: Mom's life with us of 92 years was surely not enough, we all wanted and needed more time, we just couldn't get enough of her. Kathy, Jack, Alan, Billy and Vicki had spent the last couple of years taking care of her, spending the day with her, watching her favorite show on TV, telling stories, or just falling asleep. The quality time had given all of them peace and contentment. They were there to make sure she was loved and cared for. But we all knew that she was ready to meet their father, Michael, at the gates of Heaven, she told us he was waiting for her. During the last days, I realized that Mom was an Angel (but I always knew that)she surrounded us with love, protection, faith, goodness, guiding our hearts to the best we could be and to follow our faith in God. 88: Angels carry messages from Heaven to Earth, and God was the one who gave us Our Mother, our Angel on earth. Now she is in Heaven to receive her wings. Before Mom entered into the Kingdom of God she whispered to me, " I'm passing my wings on to my family , just know they are transparent, but you'll know they are there." I still feel her presence this very moment. I feel comforted that even thou she is gone in body, her spirit lives within all of us. It warms my heart to know that our families will still have her hands holding us together and her watchful eye keeping us safe and the whispering sounds of her angel wings lifting us up when we're sad. We will share this memory of her Life, and we all will embrace that moment with love and grace. We have been blessed to have this wonderful woman as our Mother, and our Grandmother. 89: Now that Moms life on earth has ended, she will experience eternal life with God and walk hand in hand with Pop. We must look with our hearts and not with our eyes and we will see and feel the angel surrounding us at every moment with her touch and love, and feel the breeze of her wings when the wind blows. In closing, I would like to say to Mom, not Goodbye, but the words she said to each of us. So Mom I say to you: "Love you and God Bless" 90: What do you see? Angels! Now believe with your heart,not your eyes 91: This "Memory Book" is dedicated to Our Mother who touched our hearts and souls in everything we do in our lives. We miss you Mom. So Everyone remember to: Open your Hearts and BELIEVE Because she is still with us watching , protecting and loving us

Scars on 45 ||This article may require cleanup to meet Wikipedia's quality standards. (October 2011) (Learn how and when to remove this template message)| |Scars on 45| |Origin||Bradford, City of Bradford, UK| |Genres||Indie rock, indie pop| |Labels||Nettwerk Music Group| David "Nova" Nowakowski |Past members||Stuart Nichols| The band were soon signed to Atlantic Records' Chop Shop Records label, which has been successful in getting previously unsigned bands heard through song placements in popular TV programs. Most recently, the band’s single, "Heart on Fire" was selected as the lead song for the eighth season soundtrack for ABC’s top rated hospital drama, Grey’s Anatomy. Scars on 45’s first EP, Give Me Something was released in January 2011 and yielded a hit single of the same name that rose to the top 5 of the Adult Alternative Charts and was recognized as one of the "Top 3 Singles of the Year" by Amazon.com. The quintette was also named to Entertainment Weekly's "Must List." Their second EP, which also features "Heart on Fire", was released on 24 October 2011. The band released "Scars on 45," their first full-length studio album, on 10 April 2012. The album was selected by the editors at Amazon.com as number 7 out of 50 "Best Albums of 2012." Early years (2007 - present) When a broken foot ended lead singer Danny Bemrose’s professional football career as a striker for the Huddersfield Town A.F.C., he earnestly decided to learn how to play his father’s guitar. After his injury, Bemrose struck up a close friendship with another former footballer, Stuart Nichols, who had played for rival Bradford City A.F.C. Bemrose taught Nichols to play bass as they spent the next few years improving their skill and making computer recordings to develop their music. After adding pianist/keyboard player David "Nova" Nowakowski, the band began playing the local music scene, rounding out their performances with a variety of other guitarists and drummers that came and went over time. When Bemrose wrote "Insecurity," which is featured on the "Heart on Fire" EP, the band began looking for a female singer that could compliment his vocals. Soon thereafter, Nova was at home playing The Cure's "Friday I'm in Love" while his visiting schoolmate, Aimee Driver, was making a cup of tea and chimed in with the lyrics. "I just started singing along when Nova rushed in seeming really shocked," Driver recalls. "I thought his dad had a heart attack or something! He made me stand there in his living room and sing to him - which was the scariest thing ever at the time. At first I wouldn’t do it, but he wouldn't shut up so I just put my tea down, shut my eyes and sang...just to stop him pestering me. Danny recorded me on 'Insecurity.' The next thing I knew I was in the band. When I told my family and friends they were saying, ‘but you can't sing, can you?’" Before joining the band, Driver had never performed in public. Stuart Nichols recruited drummer Chris Durling after meeting him in a pub and giving him a CD of the band’s music. After a late night out, Durling returned to his house and gave it a listen. He enjoyed the results and agreed to work with them on recordings. He ended up becoming the final member of the band a short time later. The band had difficulties deciding on a name. They realized a name was critical after a chance meeting with one of their musical influences, Noel Gallagher of Oasis. A friend introduced Nichols and Bemrose to Gallagher who asked the band’s name, but they didn’t have one. "A band with no name?" Gallagher reportedly asked, "What kind of fucking band is that?" and walked off on them. The name Scars on 45 comes from an Emmylou Harris interview Bemrose heard in which she talks about scratching up her dad’s records and being scolded by him for getting "Scars on his 45’s," and is also a play on a Dutch medley act from the 80s whose group name and records alternately used versions of the phrase 'Stars on 45'. 'Scars on 45' was one of the few names considered that band members did not dismiss out of hand. 2010 – present On several occasions, the band was poised on the brink of success only to have their hopes for a record deal dashed at the last moment. When their song "Beauty’s Running Wild" was selected for an extended closing scene of an episode of CSI: New York, they finally had a select amount of money in hand to purchase equipment for recording. They also caught the ear of TV music supervisor Alex Patsavas. At the time, Patsavas had just entered an agreement with Atlantic Records to acquire her Chop Shop label under which the band is now signed. Their EP "Give Me Something" was released digitally by Chop Shop Records in January 2011, and the physical EP came out in June. A video for the single "Give Me Something," produced by DJ Brauner, turned out a bit darker and sadder than originally scripted. "The video was weird," explained Bemrose. "It tells the tale of young kids that fall in love, going through the years, and at the very end, the old fella walks back to the tree where they’d carved their names, and she’s passed away. That’s not how it was supposed to be. There was an old woman cast to play the part, so at the end, both were going to be there and fall in love again, but [the actor] couldn’t be bothered to turn up, so we just killed her off." On 13 September 2011, the Grey’s Anatomy Vol. 4 soundtrack was released featuring "Heart on Fire" as the lead track. The song was also used heavily in ABC's TV promotion of the new season, and a music video directed by Jordan Bahat was produced with the band for the ABC Music Lounge. In addition to CSI: New York and Grey’s Anatomy, they have also had their music featured on TV’s One Tree Hill, The Cleaner, Pretty Little Liars, Warehouse 13, Lost Girl, and Supernatural. Their second EP with Chop Shop Records, "Heart on Fire," debuted on 24 October 2011, as well as the band's cut of the music video, also directed by Bahat. In the winter of 2012, the band conducted their first headlining tour of North America, featuring support from solo artist Anya Marina who is also signed to Atlantic's Chop Shop record label. Scars on 45 also participated in a west coast tour with The Fray in February 2012. After supporting The Fray, Scars on 45 resumed the final dates of their headline tour. The band made their American network television debut as musical guests on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno on Friday, 2 March 2012. The band's self-titled debut album, Scars on 45, was released on 10 April 2012. In support of the album, Apple's iTunes featured the album's 6th track, "Burn the House Down," as the free "single of the week." The album also entered Billboard's "Heatseekers" album chart in the number 4 position. Scars on 45 played some solo dates in April, and is set to tour with singer Ingrid Michaelson for dates in May 2012. After that they band will be headlining throughout the summer and will play additional dates in support of "The Voice" finalist Dia Frampton. On 10 August 2012, Scars on 45 played a show back home in Bradford, Yorkshire, England, at The Live Lounge (also known as Utopia) which was a venue dedicated to supporting local musicians. In September 2012 Scars on 45 embarked on their first European tour, supporting American recording artist/songwriter Joshua Radin, including dates in Sweden, The Netherlands, Germany, England, Scotland and Ireland. The band will be in the US with dates beginning in October, 2012. As of early 2014 the band are currently touring the U.S and the UK to promote their new album "Safety In Numbers" which was released on 7 October 2014 in the US and 23 February in the UK. In April 2015, the band released its "Tasted Every Tear" EP, with four tracks: the title track, "Runaway," "Show Me What I Want," and "Love Plays Blind." In late 2015, Scars on 45 was back in the US performing select private shows before heading back to the UK to work on their third record. In November 2016, the hit CW television show, Reign, featured the band's song "Golden" in the 5th episode of season 3, titled "In A Clearing". Current band members - Danny Bemrose –lead vocals, acoustic guitar - Aimee Driver –vocals - David "Nova" Nowakowski –keyboard, piano, backing vocals - Chris Durling –drums, percussion Past band members - Stuart Nichols –bass guitar Safety In Numbers (2014) 1. Golden 2. Crazy for You 3. Tasted Every Tear 4. I Don't Wanna Break 5. This Is Not Your Love Song 6. Only a Game 7. Higher and Higher 8. Feeling 9. My Eyes Are Still Bright 10. Take You Home 11. Fading Bright Eyes Dark Scars on 45 (2012) 1. Warning Sign 2. Breakdown 3. Heart On Fire 4. Don't Say 5.Change My Needs 6. Burn The House Down 7. Give Me Something 8. Beauty's Running Wild 9. The Way That We Are 10. Insecurity 11. Loudest Alarm 12. Tomorrow Won't Die Too Soon 13. Two Way Radio 14. Promises And Empty Words - Newman, Melinda. "Full Biography". Scarson45.com. Retrieved 20 October 2010. - Rush, James. "Scars On 45 song played on CSI:NY". Bradford Telegraph and Argus. Retrieved 26 October 2011. - "ABC Music Lounge". ABC. - Maloy, Sarah. "Scars On 45 Reaches Triple A Top 5, Revs Up Second EP". Billboard.com. Retrieved 23 October 2011. - "Best Songs of the Year So Far". Amazon.com. - "The Must List: What's Hot for the Week of August 29, 2011". Entertainment Weekly. Retrieved 24 October 2011. - Smith, K. Alexander. "Album Stream: Scars on 45 - Heart on Fire EP". Paste Magazine. Retrieved 24 October 2011. - "Amazon.com: Best of the Year So Far 2012". Amazon.com. Retrieved 21 May 2012. - Ragogna, Mike. "Scars On 45's New Video and Download, Plus Chatting with Vanessa Carlton, Dan Bern and David Bromberg". Huffington Post. Retrieved 23 October 2011. - Scars on 45 (16 September 2011). 5 Questions With…Scars on 45 (flash) (webcast). The Academy’s Headquarters, Santa Monica, California: The Recording Academy. Retrieved 23 October 2011. - Brawner, DJ. "Give Me Something". Video. Anthem Films. Retrieved 24 October 2011.

A PLAY FOR TWO VOICES A) You know I’ve noticed something. A) You used to talk. A) Yes talk…you know…how the weather was…how you felt about what was happening in the world. B) The world? A) Yes you used to converse about a range of topics. A) All of that was before you saw ‘The Dumb Waiter’! B) What waiter? A) The dumb one or was it ‘The Homecoming’? B) I don’t know. A) Whatever…before Pinter. Yes…before Pinter. B.P. Not B.C. but B.P. B) British Petroleum. A) (ANGRY) Not British Petroleum. Before Pinter! B) Harold Pinter A) Exactly. B.P. Before you got caught by those Pinter two handers, three handers…whatever. Yes, before Pinter you could hold an interesting con-ver-sation. Do you remember? B) Last year in Marienbad. A) (ANGRY) That was not Pinter. That was the Robbe-Grillet frog marching off to nowhere…set within a sumptuous baroque vanishing point. B) French pomp! A) Yes you may be right. Robbe-Grillet may have indeed contributed to your minimalist behavior. You are right…Pinter could have got the bug from Grillet. (PAUSE) Does it matter? A) No. Perfect. Perfectly expressed. No. Like ‘No’s Knife’. Ambiguity highly atmospheric. Highly uplifting…some think! Waiting for crap! No, I’m not waiting for any more crap. Do you get it Godot? B) You’re tired? A) Tired! Tired? You may be right. I may be tired. Tired of waiting for years… A) Yes years! Don’t you get it? You haven’t spoken a whole sentence for years. And I’m not meaning a long sentence. Just a sentence. A beginning, a middle and an end. A proper English sentence. No clipped Gallic crap. An English sentence saying something that you mean. Something which makes sense. Something that you want to say. Not just yes…no…O.K….when? A sentence. It doesn’t have to be that arresting. Or even interesting! A) (ANGRY) No! Look are you pretending you’re not purposely torturing me with your laconic comments? As you can see, I’m not laconic. Not like that trio of language stranglers. Beckett, Robbe-Grillet and Sartre! I love language. Even when it is excessively flowery… Rococo…Baroque. Did you know that linguistic pessimism leads to fascism? A) Yes you rather like living within uncertainty. Uncertainty drives me up the wall! (PAUSE) Was this Sartre’s real purpose? Wanting everyone to share his HELL? ‘Huis Clos’. No exit. Perfect. Beckett makes the philosophical proposition—‘No God is coming to get us out of this HELL.’ And Sartre rubs it in. Hell is other people. Other people’s state of mind. Becket exposes this concealed inner bullfight on the stage… and Sartre becomes his matador…and you, yes you like nothing better than acting as Sartre’s picador…and with increasing relish hurl your cold sharp pointed darts into my screaming mind! B) Long speech! A) Another dart. Saint Sebastian is all-ways on hand. Poor blighter. Not the ending he anticipated. No way. Not the ending for a Captain in the Roman Praetorian Guard. B) Saving Christians. A) Exactly. Tortured for saving Christians from torture and death! A) Well spotted! (PAUSE) Well spotted! You’re awake! I’ve noticed that. Yes… despite everything… you still want to give the impression that your eye is still on the mental ball. That you’re still mentally awake. Still in contact with the human dilemma. A) O there’s no dilemma in the human world? No atrocities in Syria? No starving children in Africa? Dilemma? Haven’t you heard that this glorious planet’s hidden name is ‘Total Dilemma’? Look, is it really getting hotter or not? B) Greenhouse effect? A) YES!!! YEEEEEES! Are we going down inside a greenhouse or not? WHO can I trust to tell me? TRUST? Tell me, for God’s sake, in a series of sensible sentences. They don’t have to be well crafted. Just honest. To the point, without any uncertainty. Hotter or colder? No… what’s the word…? A) Equivocation! Yes! Yes! Now there’s a word. A word not heard every day of the week. Not every day. That’s exactly what I want. NO equivocation. No whiff of any political jargon. No bad smell from any politician. I’d rather a good old fashioned safe-breaker tell me the score! B) The score? A) Yes the score concerning this notion of global catastrophe… whether from too many people, too many floods or not enough fresh water. B) Nuclear pollution. A) Yes, well that’s the cherry on the top of the greenhouse fantasy. A) Yes it’s a story. A STORY! No one really knows what’s going on any more. B) Any more A) YES. (SHOUTS) ANY MORE! I know, I know, did anyone ever know what the real point is of our existence? Did they? A) That’s the point isn’t it? Who are they? B) Hidden persuaders! A) Vance Packard! Yes, we can’t say we haven’t been warned! You notice I said ‘we’? A) Well then there seems to be a question of sides. Divisions. Us and them. The persuaders aren’t just office boys. A) We don’t know who they are. If we did they wouldn’t be hidden would they? A) Exactly. They could be gods…or magicians who… B) Walk through walls. A) That’s right. They’re beyond our ken. We postulate aliens operating in different dimensions. B) Higher vibrations! A) Or lower vibrations. Don’t forget that possibility. Lower demonic vibrations. Hellish worlds. A) Exactly. We’ve been invaded…and are STILL being invaded from demonic worlds. And what are they trying to do? They are trying to drive me mad! A) O give over. The darts! Your verbal innocent darts! Thrown at me! ME! And your feigned innocence is a major factor in driving me around THE BEND! And don’t say bend! A) Am I off my trolly? Very clever insinuation. Is the Earth a trolly being pulled round the sun? Dave Tomlin suggested it was. Sun Trolly was the name of the band he formed. A) Of course! A band of musicians…not a band of trouble-makers…or winkle-pickers…irate protesters. Yes…those were the days. The days of bright colours and endless rhythm. This is the funeral.(PAUSE) Yes I feel sorry for the young. A) Unfair? When was fairness ever a light in human worldly interaction? Of course it’s unfair to be blown up in your pram! B) Iraq. Syria. A) Libya. Egypt. B) Balham High Street. A) Now you’re talking. Balham High Street. You’re closing right in. It’s where I live. Out the door…down the road—the very busy road—and just round the corner…157 Balham High Street. And right outside my door…a bomb could go off in a pram or a van…at any moment. B) Or never. A) Never is too loose. I can’t focus on the notion of ‘never’. I need a point to focus on. B) Potential explosion. A) Well that’s what’s being pushed down my throat. Greenhouse gas explosion! Where’s the fun? Real fun. Human warm fun. Not idiotic T.V. gags and falsity. NO! I don’t have one. You don’t have one. B) We’re quits. A) On this score, yes. Yes, we’ve quitted the dumbing down enclosure. A) Willful suicide. A) That’s a point. Computers. They’re actually different. A) Yes, T.V.s and computers both have screens. True. But there’s more you can do with a computer. A) Of course! You know what? You’re getting more…helpful. I’m feeling less like a Saint Sebastian dartboard. Like I’m feeling less like a class enemy. In fact I’m convinced that you’re making an effort to be more friendly. B) More friendly? A) Yes…more friendly. Of course you’re right on the money. There’s no question of ‘more’. I should have said, ‘now you’re being friendly’. Not MORE…since you were decidedly un-friendly before this…this…what shall I call it? Before this welcome thaw? B) Let’s dance. (HE PUTS ON AFRICAN DANCE MUSIC) (THEY DANCE) A) (WHILST DANCING) You know, I have never got used to dancing with a man. I don’t know what it is? As you can see I’m not against it. It’s …what shall I say…slightly un-nerving. Definitely un-nerving. Perhaps it’s in my blood? B) Not English. (DOES A TWIRL. BOTH STILL DANCING) A) Exactly! Well of course (DOES A TWIRL) the old school frowns down on such past-times. Don’t you long for the fun we once shared? (THEY BOTH STOP DANCING) A) Yes I agree. Was anything ever shared? A) Ah! Longing. Yes… I see it! … Like those spell-binding sunsets…on the Nile… near Luxor. Would ‘longing for Godot’ be an improvement? A) Only different? Longing and waiting. Longing for what one is waiting. Perhaps waiting for the end of all longing. That longing for love. A) Waiting for love. B) Never comes. A) Then the sudden shock! A) No… The unexpected arrival of love. A) (TRIUMPHANT) YES! Love is normality! B) Acceptance. (BOTH START DANCING AGAIN) A) Real life. B) Real life. A) Is real life the same as perfect life? A) Exactly. Someone to bestow grace upon us. B) Female presence. A) Of course. You remember those days? Those days when one felt so light hearted… so light hearted—it seemed one lived inside a dome of golden liquid light. Now almost … B) The Golden Forgotten. A) You say it so calmly as if you hardly care that we are no longer alive inside that life-giving eternity of golden light. You must understand… that for me, as it appears to be NOW… this condition we’re in NOW… is as close to Hell… that I want to come. I can hardly breathe inside this fog of lies we seem forced to inhabit. A) Now you’re talking. How have I become dependent on what poisons my soul? How have I become dependent on LIES? Even afraid to come clean about the lies I manage like circus animals. I disgust myself… my un-nerving weakness. That’s it isn’t it? Supporting lies with one’s soul… makes one’s soul weak… and a weak soul succumbs to ingesting more lies. A) Exactly. It is I who is producing this noxious horrible fog I inhabit. O.K. (PAUSE) I was going to call you ‘Mr Smart-ass’. But I saw…just in time… that would indeed make this gruesome atmosphere which I’ve been breathing… absorbing, even more dark and poisonous. So, my dear friend, your quiet steadiness has uplifted my soul. Please forgive me for projecting on to you my twisted assumptions. I can see now that your laconic engagements with my sleeping soul were a form of medicine. B) Necessary medicine. A) Yes, very necessary… but when we were in love wasn’t that a marvelous medicine? B) Yes… marvelous. A) But now neither sister graces our endless aloneness. We have been forced to learn something I find very, very difficult. Hard. But slowly, an odd moment here… an odd moment there… I find myself able to appreciate life without being supported by love. B) Without her. A) Yes of course… appreciating being alive…without her hand in mine. B) Heart breaking. A) One could cry. Crack up. Fall to pieces. Give up. Give in. But no… that won’t do. A) YES! Exactly I am ALIVE! Now is the opportunity for a completely different approach to my daily existence. A) Yes… that could be it! Living by faith! Faith in life. In this miracle that I exist. And you exist. EXIST! How I’ve overlooked this miracle of my own existence. B) Embroiled in views. A) Exactly to the point. Instead of enjoying being alive I put my life into my views on existence. Of course I was heart-broken. Lonely. Desperate. And I tried one way after another to escape my aloneness. I didn’t want to be alone. It seemed so unfair. So deadly. Of course I never gave myself a chance to find out what aloneness actually is. I just re-acted to my fear of what I thought it was like. B) Self defeat. A) In a nut shell. And inside the claustrophobic smallness of a nutshell I existed. In fear. Yes my friend, I’ve been suffocating inside an empty nutshell… for a very long time. Suffocating ‘inside a sense of injustice’. A sense of being un-fairly abandoned. B) By love. A) Yes! Yes! Yes! Abandoned by love. Did I deserve that? I say no! I didn’t deserve to be abandoned in hell! But… A) There’s something not right in what I’m saying. I was abandoned because I projected my hellish fear onto her. She couldn’t take my mad fits of paranoia and anger. I could see it coming and tried to convince her that she would be making a BIG MISTAKE if she left me. That convinced her that it was time to take flight. Being a night bird she left me in the dark… for ever. A) Yes… very tragic. B) Very tragic. A) But you too. Yes you also were left bereft. But like the good boy scout… you already were prepared for your fall from grace. You’ve always seemed to cope with adversity. No bewilderment like Hamlet … but like our dear friend Sebastian… you’ve taken every arrow of outrageous fortune like a real man… standing upright … with even a hint of a smile. Now at last I understand what it is… you always know more than your assailants… you always understand more deeply… more profoundly… than your enemies. Even when she left you for dead on that battlefield. A) Carnage. The mind-numbing horror of a losing battle. Of course she was a man at that point. Your bosom friend… riding off at speed… on your horse. B) White steed. A) Of course. Of course.! You no doubt were brilliant. The hero in shining armour. Was I there? That’s the issue isn’t it? Was it I that made the cowardly escape and not her? How could I be sure? B) Want to be. A) Yes of course I would have to have a burning need to know the truth of this. A) Do I want to know? Want to? Do I want to know if I was your wife one hundred years ago who abandoned you then…as I had done long before when I was your soldier companion… a fellow Crusader? B) A fellow Crusader. A) Quite frankly enmity is arising in me again. Everything felt so much better when we were dancing. How have we come to this? A) Of course! I’m not sure about my identity. Not sure about who you are. Different memories. Does it matter? A) I shouldn’t have asked. It matters because It seems I’m blindly—that is unconsciously—going round and round on the same infernal dementing carousel. Going from the tiger to the elephant to the horse to the cockerel … but always staying on board… and getting nowhere. Why don’t I jump OFF? A) Thank you. Well I can’t refute that assessment. Yes it was my own words. On board an infernal dementing carousel. And the real point is—I must be on it NOW! And you’re a wounded spectator watching me whizz by every now and then. A) No wonder I can’t change. B) Can’t change? A) Yes! Yes! I see it. It’s not I can’t change. I won’t change. A) Yes I’m an addict. A junkie hooked on tomorrow. A) Guilt… of course. I took your horse and left you to die with your guts hanging out…and then… when I was your wife… I left you for your best friend. B) In France. A) Yes. Yes. In France. Of course I remember. Did my unconscious influence Rob Grillet? It should have been ‘Last Lifetime In Marienbad’. Where was the battle? A) What is it like to be so clear? So calm? Why don’t you hate me for being such a bastard to you? A) Jesus Christ… of course. Saint Sebastian is a different kettle of fish. In all those sexy paintings where he’s penetrated by one arrow after another… you would imagine he’s at death’s door. Wrong! He didn’t die! Helen—I think that’s her name… A) Yes of course! Irene—bless her—The dear woman got him back to her house—and somehow he recovers. B) The healing power of love! A) Exactly! Exactly so…But then… that bastard Emperor went riding by Irene’s house accompanied by his retinue of thugs. So, determined to let the bastard Emperor know what he thought of him… Sebastian stood on the step outside Irene’s house and not feeling full of forgiveness… but feeling raging anger… screamed pointed insults at the Emperor!!! B) Death wish. A) Perhaps. Perhaps. Well yes…the boss immediately dispatches his louts to beat up poor Sebastian… who ends up a sorry mess… dying in a sewer. Bastard Roman Emperor. A) For they know not what they do. A) Yes. Exactly. The true human being endlessly crucified by the mindless robots. Love trampled under mindless swine. B) Our story. A) Endless betrayal. B) Animal Farm. A) God we are trawling beyond the common comfort zones. Time to dance again. (THEY DANCE TO MORE AFRICAN DRUM MUSIC) You know, I’m definitely getting over my shyness. Feeling more alive. You look… amused. Why shouldn’t you? We’ve crossed a few barriers today. A) I was afraid you’d say that! Look I’m dancing. And so are you! Neil Oram 2013 Pic: Dave Cooper

The agents of STORM take over where Department 57 leaves off – the first book describes how a shape-shifting dragon, tired of hiding his true self flies over Central Park and causes a torrent of publicity. It was getting harder for Talents to hide, and now they don’t have to. But revealing their true selves starts a whole new line of trouble. Now the battle with the people who would like to tame them and use them are out to get them, to discredit them any way they can. And so a new adventure begins… When a dragon flies over Central Park, he jolts the world into awareness. Shape-shifters and vampires finally reveal their existence, and people show their fangs, wings and claws to their neighbors. But exposure doesn’t deter old enemies. Megan meets Sandro at the lowest time of her life – when she thinks her crazy nightmares are symptoms of the tumor that is killing her. But the sexy dragon shape-shifter tells her the dreams are telepathic messages from his missing brother Ricardo. More than telepathy flares between them. Megan and Sandro burn up the night with sizzling passion, but Sandro won’t commit, and Megan wants more than a fling. When Sandro rescues Megan from Ricardo’s captors she gives him the key to locate his brother, but he wants far more from the sexy archivist. He wants her body, all ways, all day, all night. But this is his last case for the STORM agency and he knows he can’t promise Megan any kind of forever. Of all the hotels in New York, she had to walk into his. After Chase’s beloved Jillian dies in a car wreck, he uses her name as a code for the STORM agents who use his luxury hotel. When a woman registers as Jillian Miller, he assumes it is business as usual. But it’s not. The woman he believed dead has come back. Jillian’s mission for the IRDC, enemy to all Talents, shouldn’t include wild days and steamy nights but Chase’s hot, powerful body drives her crazy. Torn between her mission and her craving for Chase, Jillian doesn’t know which side she’s on anymore. To save both their lives, Chase must restore the gaps in Jillian’s memory. He uses their shared past, including her passion for public sex, to bring her back to him. If she doesn’t remember soon, she’ll die. And he won’t let her die alone. Johann isn’t happy with his latest assignment for STORM – until he meets Ania Zelinski. Johann and Ania ignite passion that lights up the Los Angeles sky. They can’t get enough of each other even though Johann thinks Ania knows more than she’s telling about his quarry, the elusive Dr. Bennett. Ania should be concentrating on her failing catering company and her sick brother, not spending her days and nights in sexual ecstasy, but she can’t keep away. When Johann introduces her to his best friend, she discovers what it’s like to have two demanding, lustful men in her bed. She is falling in love with Johann, even though she knows he’s a vampire, with a lifespan much longer than hers. Perhaps, in his arms, she can discover what forever feels like. Or perhaps they’ll both die, if they don’t find Bennett before he finds them. Book 4 in the STORM series. One kiss was all he wanted. And one kiss was the only thing she denied him. Dragon shape-shifter Ricardo Gianetti wakes in a sweat, knowing he has telepathically contacted a woman in trouble. The same trouble he got into a year ago. With the help of STORM, he tracks her, the latest victim of the evil Dr. Bennett. But Kristen Turner is no pushover. A bodyguard for the first Talented senator, Ricardo’s brother Sandro, she is used to looking after herself and doesn’t wait for someone else to rescue her. She escapes, and Ricardo finds her naked and shivering on a crowded New York street. Attraction sparks between them and they can’t resist each other. But while Ricardo is ready to commit, Kristen backs off. They set the night on fire. Kristen loves the sizzling passion Ricardo brings to her, but she won’t love him. Until she can’t help it. And Bennett wants them back. Together they might, just might, win. Doing It Right Before he became a jaguar shape-shifter and STORM agent, Jack Hargreaves was a librarian and archivist. Almost a geek. Working undercover in Oxford, England, Jack can almost believe he dreamed the last few years when his life turned around. Except for sexy shape-shifter Shere, an Egyptian goddess with eyes of melting seduction and a body built for sin. And old friends who turn out not so friendly after all. Shere already has a colleague—and lover—in Oliver, English lord, STORM agent and vampire. But when she sees Jack, all bets are off. She wants him badly, but she wants Oliver too. Can she have both? What should be a routine operation rapidly goes bad, and Jack, Shere and Oliver, together with Chase Maynord, face danger that threatens them all and could blow the operation wide open. Along with their bodies, hearts and minds. Could Jack’s first field operation become his last? Until recently Andros was a severely disabled geek working for STORM. Now he’s a powerful shape-shifting dragon. Still a geek, though. Meeting university professor Faye came as a shock, since they were sharing the same air space at the time. But it didn’t take long to come to terms with that and each other in a convenient hotel room. Hot, fast, rampant sex is just what Andros needs. Until he wakes up and discovers what else she’s taken from him. Tangling with her between the sheets, against her desk, pretty much anywhere he can have her, takes energy Andros now has in abundance. But he won’t let his emotions follow. Not this side of – oh, hell. Faye never met anyone in her long life as exciting as Andros. But he works for STORM, Faye’s enemy. She’s never had anyone so young, either. But she can’t resist his strength, his determination – or his ripped body. Together they must hunt down a mutual enemy, but to defeat him they have to come to terms with what they are, were and will become.

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With close to $30 million earned earned late last night, the problematic Eclipse is expected to pull down $150 million by the end of the July 4th holiday, or by the evening of Monday, July 5th. As Peter O’Toole says to Donald Wolfit in Becket, “I would spit if I were not in God’s house.” Which alludes to my idea about theatres being churches. A stretch, agreed, but it allows me to quote Anouilh. I feel so dispirited about Taylor Hackford‘s Love Ranch that I haven’t been able to write anything about it. This is primarily because the bluntly phrased dialogue — the most irritating aspect because of its colloquial boilerplate tone, particularly as spoken by Joe Pesci‘s Joe Conforte-ish character — was written by Mark Jacobson, a New York magazine contributor whom I know slightly and have admired for many years. All I can figure is that (a) Jacobson was asked to dumb it down by Hackford because the latter felt it “right” that the characters speak this way, and Jacobson did so in order to get paid, (b) he gave the dialogue an uneducated Nevada goombah flavor as a perverse exercise of some kind or (c) his dialogue was of a higher pedigree but Hackford urged the actors (especially Pesci) to slop it down and say it the way they felt it. Indiewire‘s Anne Thompson has summarized some of the reviews thus far. TheWrap‘s Hunter Walker has posted a grotesque story about Robert Sanchez, 36 year-old honcho of the recently defunct fanboy site IESB.net, having run for the hills over allegations of sexual misconduct with his step-daughter. HE mentioned Sanchez twice in ’07 concerning (a) his being involved in a police-supervised sting that recovered Indy 4 photos that had been stolen from Steven Spielberg’s office, and (b) early-bird set photos of Robert Downey, Jr. in his Iron Man outfit that Sanchez posted but then took down due to legal warnings. Sanchez “has gone missing for roughly three weeks after allegations of sexual misconduct with his underage stepdaughter,” Hunter’s story reports. “Detectives were seeking Sanchez in connection with allegations of sexual abuse regarding ‘things to do with his stepdaughter and the internet,’ Tracy Dorsey, a spokeswoman for the Rancho Cucamonga police department, told TheWrap on Wednesday. “Asked about rumors going around Hollywood’s digital movie media circles that the 36-year-old Sanchez had drugged and raped his stepdaughter and videotaped the act, Dorsey replied: ‘We’re looking into all of those allegations.’ She stressed that no charges have been filed, and there is currently no warrant for his arrest; nor has he been classified as a missing person. “Jamie Williams, one of Sanchez’ writers for IESB.com, resigned on Monday in a post on the site. Though the post is largely innocuous, he told TheWrap in an email Wednesday morning that he and the IESB staff were told a few weeks ago that there was a ‘family emergency/tragedy.’ “‘Then as of this past Friday evening, it was heavily implied that Robert had passed away,’ Williams wrote. ‘We agreed to stay on and help for the time being under these circumstances. It wasn’t until Monday evening we were aware of the details of Robert being on the run and his actions. And the icing on the cake was us being forwarded bills for IESB.’ “Sanchez’ whereabouts have been unknown for about three weeks, though he is not listed as a missing person. “Sanchez lives in Alta Loma; his home phone had been disconnected. The IESB.net Twitter feed was taken down early this week.” IESB is an acronym standing for “Inland Empire Strikes Back.” I don’t believe that Francis Coppola was fired off Patton — i.e., relieved of screenwriting duties — solely because his 20th Century Fox bosses didn’t care for the opening speech-to-the-troops scene. (Other factors must have been in play.) But I love his message about how “the things you’re fired for when young are often the same things you’re given awards for later in life.” This bit appears on Patton DVD and Bluray. I agree with all but one of the best shot films between ’98 and ’08 named in an American Cinematographer poll. I concur with the celebrating of Amelie, Children of Men, Saving Private Ryan, There Will Be Blood, No Country for Old Men, The Dark Knight, Road to Perdition, City of God and American Beauty…but I say “no” to Jeff Cronenweth‘s cinematography of David Fincher‘s Fight Club . Sorry but I’ve always despised the somewhat murky, underlit look of that film — as if the negative had been soaked in a vat of cappucino mixed with guacamole and string beans. Throughout most of the film Brad Pitt, Edward Norton and Helena Bonham Carter‘s skin looks greenish-gray. The last time I watched it (on Bluray) it pissed me off and made me feel depressed all over again. Replace Fight Club with Roger Deakins‘ capturing of The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford or John Toland‘s work on The Thin Red Line or Harris Savides‘ shooting of Zodiac and we’re good to go. I finally tried Vanity Fair‘s Movie Madness Trivia app, and it’s kind of fun because of four factors. One, many of the questions (suggested by VF contributors Peter Biskind, David Kamp, Frank DiGiacomo and Rebecca Keegan) aren’t easy. Two, you have to answer fairly quickly or you lose. Three, you have to prove your mettle before taking all the quizzes (i.e., if you’re too clueless you “stay back” like in high school). And four, the animated “Little Graydon” character gives snappy little replies whether you’re right or wrong. I did fairly well — well, not too badly — but I also dropped the ball a few times, partly out of ignorance and partly due to the ticking-clock thing making me nervous. The app asks two wrongos though — misleading questions in which the “answer” is incorrect. One asks which actress has never appeared nude in a film. Two of the choices are Julia Roberts and Julie Andrews . Everyone knows Roberts has never gone there, but for some reason I chose Andrews because (a) Roberts has shown more skin than Andrews ever did with somewhat revealing outfits or bikinis, and (b) the only skin-revealing moment Andrews had in a film was a fleeting breast-baring moment in Blake Edwards‘ S.O.B (’79). But the VF app said I was wrong. No, they’re wrong. “Breast-baring” does not equal “nude scene.” Another asks which actor “constantly wears a football helmet” during his screen time in this or that film. VF’s correct answer is Jack Nicholson in Easy Rider. Except Nicholson’s alcoholic Southern lawyer doesn’t constantly wear a football helmet — he wears it in maybe two scenes (if that) when he’s shown riding on the back of Peter Fonda‘s chopper. The rest of the time we’re shown Jack’s natural follicles (i.e., what little he had of them, even back in ’69). So I didn’t choose Nicholson, and the app said I was wrong and “Little Graydon” put me down besides…little fucker. Otherwise the app is very cool. It’s the most difficult film trivia test I’ve ever taken since the late Stuart Byron used to run exra-difficult movie quizzes in the Village Voice in the late ’70s. What’s wrong with the dialogue in this clip? What’s the particular disturbance, more to the point, with Sen. Amy Klobuchar of Minnesota? Did she bring up the midnight showings of Eclipse to suggest that Elena Kagan is jes’ folks and…what, gets what’s happening in the culture of families these days? Surreal. This assemblage has some funny stuff, though. I don’t want to see Paramount eat it with The Last Airbender (7.1). I have no dog in this fight. And I understand why I wasn’t invited to a screening because they know I hate this stuff going in. But for a movie that cost $150 million to make and is costing a king’s ransom to market, I’m not feeling the molecular current, even though it opens tomorrow. No buzz, nobody’s talking about it, and only two negative Rotten Tomatoes reviews so far. Everyone’s seen this East of Eden audition clip in which Paul Newman was trying for the role of Aaron, the older brother of Cal (i.e., James Dean‘s role). It’s clear who the more delicate and vulnerable actor is. Newman has that jokey-gruff streetcorner thing down as a covering mechanism while Dean is a bit more open to whatever. He obviously senses this, and so he throws Newman a line he knows will tap him off-balance. You can see Dean’s idea beginning to happen around the eight-second mark. At the 14-second mark he says “kiss me” and Newman quickly says “can’t hear.” They both laugh it off, but it’s obvious that if Newman had been receptive Dean would have been the woman in the relationship. I mean that in a complimentary way. A year or so later Dean had landed the role of Rocky Graziano in Somebody Up There Likes Me. Newman got the part, of course, after Dean’s car-crash death in September 1955. The Robert Wise-directed boxing drama came out in December 1956. I saw it sometime in the mid ’90s. It hasn’t aged well. Newman’s dese-dom-dose accent feels conspicuously “acted” each and every second. The film has moments (the ones with Pier Angeli, the final fight scene) but it mainly feels too “scripted” in the then-popular vein of ’50s televised drama. It’s a little too sentimental, emotionally underlined, on-the-nose. If Dean had played Graziano, though, it would probably have a more elevated reputation today. Who cares about this movie today? Bottom line: in the mid ’50s Dean was twice if not three times the actor that Newman was. Newman found a more naturalistic, less-actorish groove starting with his legendary performance in Hud in ’63, and for all we know Dean, had he lived, might not have grown or developed as successfully. But in the mid ’50s Dean was the live-wire hare and Newman was…well, not a tortoise but a hare who hadn’t yet figured himself out. I spoke early this afternoon with Vikram Jayanti, director of The Agony and the Ecstasy of Phil Spector, which I reviewed at length last weekend. I left my Canon Elph at the Soho House last night so I was forced to use my iPhone 4. I’m now sitting in a noisy Starbucks without my earphones, so I don’t even know how loud or clear the sound is. Whatever — these two clips represent most of our 19-minute chat. Jayanti emphasized that he didn’t choose to make an Errol Morris film that would bore deeply into the particulars of Spector’s guilt (or possible innocence) in the death of Lana Clarkson. He believes, however, that there is an area of reasonable doubt as to whether Spector shot Clarkson or not. I believe that at worst the shooting was a stupid accident. (In the video Jayanti passes along a rumor that I hadn’t heard about Clarkson and handguns that I’d rather not repeat it in print.) Jayanti reports that the jailed Spector is being kept in solitary except for a half-hour per day of exercise, and that all he has for diversion is a lousy black-and-white TV set and that he’s basically “in hell.” He also reports that Spector got into a fracas with some Latino guy and that the guy punched Spector and knocked his front teeth out. If you were to regard “Spector” as an acronym, what would the letters stand for? I saw David Slade‘s Eclipse (Summit, 6.30) at last night”s Manhattan all-media screening. Whoo, boy. The first wave of Eclipse commenters who said it’s better than New Moon didn’t lie — it is. Somewhat. But it’s still not good enough to matter. It’s a slow, boring, unimaginative, tediously written slog and is not — repeat, not — better than the first Twilight film. It’s not “organic” in the slightest, as Indiewire‘s Anne Thompson recently said. It’s about a bunch of young actors with bad wigs and conspicuous vampire makeup standing around trying to look captivating and speaking stiff soap-opera dialogue and going through the paces because they’ve been well paid to do so. It’s Fake-itude Incarnate. It doesn’t groove or flow or put the hook in even slightly. Okay, it does here and there. I’ll give it that. Some young women in the rear of the balcony went “whoo-hoo!” when Taylor Lautner and/or Robert Pattinson did or said something sexy with Kristen Stewart. I didn’t understand why because this movie is in and out, at best. And mostly out. I have to protect you, Bella. Here…hop on my motorcycle. I can protect you better than he can. We can deal with the The Newborns. All you werewolves need to meet us in the forest so we can train for the coming battle. I’m gonna die and become a vampire. Mom? Don’t count too much on having grandkids. Feel my warm heart beating inside my naked muscle-toned chest. Edward isn’t even alive. My feelings are hard to express but this is kinda how I’m feeling…I think. Isn’t that what finally matters? What we feel, who we love, and…like, you know, how much money this movie makes? Why does Bella even hang with Jacob, knowing as she does that it just tortures Edward? What is this ‘torn between two lovers’ shit when she doesn’t really want Jacob in the first place? Why am I polluting my intellect by even thinking about this stuff? I’ve had it with the faux-creepy milieu, those forests, Jacob’s torso, those werewolves, Edward’s glistening skin and red eyes, Bella’s anxious expressions and her dad’s idiotic urgings that she hang out with Jacob instead of Edward, and the whole teen angst vibe. Do these kids know how bad this dialoge sounds? Have they ever heard of Search for Tomorrow, General Hospital, The Secret Storm, etc.? I sat next to a plump, big-haired Latina mom and her similarly proportioned daughter. As soon as they arrived and sat down the mom asked what her daughter wanted at the candy counter and said, “Okay, be right back.” She returned nine or ten minutes later with two family-sized Twizzlers, two medium-monster popcorns, two extra-large drinks and a hot dog. I tried not to listen to the sounds of their eating.

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