While the mutant had thrown Janice off balance, mainly because she had been anticipating a fight but it had ended in a single shot, then learned it had been a soldier before it became a monster.  It was disconcerting and upsetting but she was in controle.<br/><br/>The gore and severed heads however were something else.  To her it was a hundred bodies and sea of blood threatening to drown her.  Anyone looking at her would see the blood drain from her feature and her eyes glass over.  Her troups, lives that had depended on her command had been mercilessly torn apart BECAUSE of her command.  She had only watched in shocked awe as they had been decimated by the enemy.  It may not have been her fault that the reports had been wrong and what was supposed to be only a small force of Necron had turned out to be a whole army but it WAS her fault for freezing, for not calling her forces back.  Everything had ended so quickly and she may as well have killed them all with her own hands.<br/><br/>Everything was still far, far to fresh for her not to mention it was the whole reason she was here.  She trembled slightly as she stood staring at the gore.  Had there been anything, anything even the tiniest bit threatening she would have gladly charged it bearhanded but there was nothing.  Only her allies.  Allies she turned her back on now so they couldn't see her face.  Her shoulders sagging as she whispered again, "<span class="bbc_size" style="font-size: 8pt;">No, no, no, not again.  I won't let it happen again.  Please Lord, please help me, give me strength,</span>" she paused then as a realisation came over her.  She wiped her face on her sleeve and stood straight, speaking more firmly, "No, I understand, this is a Sign.  This is a step of my redemption."<br/><br/>She turns to face her allies, her eyes red but her face stony, her voice firm. "I will NOT let any of you down.  I swear on the God-king's thrown that every one of you will walk out of this place if I need to face the forces of Chaos alone," this afirmation was less for them than it was for herself.  She HAD to say it, to have it witnessed.  She had finally recovered her centre.