I wasn't entirely serious. ::) You might be better off trying to bargain to allow the tail attack to be used in place of a shield bash for IT maneuvers. If anything could be described as a living 'iron tortoise', it would be an ankylosaur, and while certain IT maneuvers would make no sense with a club tail (like Iron Shell), it's quite a bit less silly than said ankylosaur smacking people with a shield strapped to its head or tail.