"Ah, yes. I know what you're here for then!"<br/><br/>When the seller comes back, it's with a small, if bulky thing that wouldn't reach below Harper's chest if she put the to- hea- to- no head up to her forehead. It is however the most profoundly ugly eyesore Harper's ever had the misfortune to lay eyes on.  The monstrosity looks like somebody strapped an elf, an orc, a human, two dwarves, a troll, and a few animals into the world's fastest tilt-a-whirl, set up some cameras, and decided to carve the ugliest looking results after a half-hour.<br/><br/>Those results were then later put into a computer program and the ugliest mixture then actually carved.<br/><br/>"Now, be careful, it's heavy because it's the stuff dreams are made of. Which is 73% lead, 17% black paint, and 10% proprietary materials if you want to buy any."