<br/><div class="floatleft">(https://i.imgur.com/p7uOZ6q.jpg)</div><strong>Name:</strong>Chevis the Chic<br/><br/><hr/><br/><strong>“This is simply outrageous!”</strong>Chevis the (very) Chic stood, waving his hands frantically at the docks.  A large pirate ship that was parked there seemed to be the focus of his ire.  At least, that was probably what one would assume as he alternated between staring at it, pointing at it, and breaking into sloshy sounding sobs.<br/><br/><strong>”Salmon!  Salmon! “</strong>He cried, knowing the simple word would cause understanding to bloom in the minds of all who heard.<br/><br/>He turned around, baffled at the confused look at several of the people who had gathered there.  The poor things must be under some terrible enchantment spell for them to not understand.  (He would not be surprised if the pirate responsible for the boat was also responsible for such a spell!)<br/><br/><strong>”Citizens at the docks take note of this crime against fashion and taste!  Not only is this large vessel blocking my latest shipment of salmon from docking, but this ship is clearly made of oak wood.  As we <em>all</em> know Oak is so very last season!”</strong><br/><br/>Gesturing to the boats wheel, he flipped and flopped his hands in place of the missing fish.<strong>”And just look at this, this… this… <em>circular</em> wheel.  Have you even seen anything so uninspired and insipid?!  We are far advanced beyond circular wheels in society; none should still exist that are not triangles, or perhaps particularly squat parallelograms.”</strong><br/><br/><strong>”This is truly a war on fashion, good taste, and decency I say!”</strong><br/><br/>As a merchant approached Chevis and offered him tuna in place of his delayed salmon shirmpment, the man truly shrieked.<strong>”You see!  You see, the pirate-chanter…  has gotten to you too, you poor poor thing!  I can’t pair tuna with the brilliant paper from torn-apart school books!  Everyone knows tuna goes with tin, and that… THAT… is not a road I will go down again.”</strong><br/><br/><strong>“NEVER AGAIN!”</strong>Chevis cried, shaking his fist at the sky.<br/>