<strong> John Fredricks  (http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y200/babycakes_0765/John2.jpg)...continuing the chat with Katey.</strong><br/><br/><div class="quoteheader"><div class="topslice_quote">Quote</div></div><blockquote class="bbc_standard_quote">"John, I get it.  And, this---" she gestured back and forth between them, "---this is pretty fucking awesome.  I don't want a free ride, I don't want to sing again.  I want real, you know?" She grasped the sleeve of his jacket and waited until those damned glasses were looking down at her.  "I heard...About your loss.. And, I'm so sorry.  I couldn't use the phone or I'd have called you."</blockquote><div class="quotefooter"><div class="botslice_quote"></div></div><br/>John listened ..held himself upright as his right hand made into a fist , he pumped it some as if counting .Looking back at the girl ..<strong>." Nothing no one could of done ...Sandra played a game , they were always playing games . No one made him play ...he loved the thrill of it all . Oh John ..ease up ...yea I did and walked out , next thing I know ..I wake up and he is gone . Just a game . " </strong>shaking his head .<br/><br/><strong>" I need to smoke or something ....I tired , drove all night here ....okay . "</strong>as he lifted his hand and waved her off . Took a few steps and stopped glancing back at her as if he was going to say something else .<br/><br/>After a long pause ...<strong>" Lot has changed since then you know ......I didn't let myself get close to no one for a couple years , just dead lifeless sex . I didn't give two shits about anyone or anything . Went through the motions and pushed everyone the hell away from me . Lonely ...so lonely of an existence. Now ...I am cautious but someone helped me figure out its okay to let others in . "</strong><br/><br/>Glancing towards Ava as she seemed to be moving to help with the stage and that giving her a nod of his head . He might need to explain all this later , but not right now .  He really didn't owe anyone an explanation but if he was going to be involved the way he wished with that girl then she needed to know a little more about him. He still needed that buzz as he could feel the withdrawals mounting ..the agitation increasing .<br/><br/>He waved his hand ...<strong>" Go on ...Katey ...damn it , get that coffee in there before that bastard has a cow and fires your ass . Your on your own keeping this fricking job ..and ....."</strong>he stopped .<strong>" No more bringing up the past either .....you want to hide from yours , I don't want to talk shit about mine either in public . GOT IT . " </strong>He was a bit harsh on the last part , as he looked down avoiding her eyes .<br/><br/>Then he stormed off to the Bus muttering about needed sleep ....screw this shit . Soon he was up on the bus , collecting his gym bag and stuffing the package Maggie gave him inside . He was headed to the Hotel , get himself a hot shower ...smoke weed til he passed the fuck out . With any luck maybe Ava would wake him up and use him as she pleased . God it been awhile since a woman dominated him ...and he wanted it badly , wanted Paul ..but that wasn't possible .