The final kiss had irritated me beyond words. I told myself as he grabbed my hair I wouldn't respond to hm and still I'd kissed him back melting against him having the insane desire to wrap my arms around him, hold him close and prolong his stay.<br/><br/>But as irritated as the kiss had made me was nothing compared to that fact that the man had my purse. I wasn't like most girls I had no illusions that my purse was secret 'Owner' had just loved going threw them once the girls started carrying them but I kept a few personal items in it I desperately wanted right now.<br/><br/>My ipod jumped to mind but I had my laptop and all my music there but my mothers ring was on my key chain resting quietly waiting for me. I'd always drawn strength from that simple band of silver and I wanted it now, that I couldn't have till tomorrow evening and possibly not even then had me pacing my room like a caged animal.<br/><br/>I strode to my closet and found a pack of cigarettes nestled among the folds of fabric. My lighter one of my favorites was in my purse irritating me further but I had another in one of my socks. After a few minutes I was taking a deep drag and relaxing some what. While smoking I looked threw my clothes and pulled out a black tank top and a pair of boxers one of the girls had given me long ago that were worn and comfortable.<br/><br/>Slipping on the night clothes I went to my bed but the disheveled look of the bed wasn't in the least comforting. Needing to be ride of the feel of Goodfellow in my room I pulled the bedding off with a vengeance and shoved it under the bed. The leash on the wall was un-clipped then thrown towards the bed falling short was then kicked under the bed to join the bedding.<br/><br/>Stripping the pillow cases from the pillows I shoved them under as well and found an old blanket in my stuff. It smelled of smoke and the perfume I love comforting in an odd way. I tried to lay down and sleep but even as tired as I was sleep didn't come.<br/><br/>I curled up in the chair and opened my laptop and with a sigh started writing the journal entry I'd been hoping to put off. Putting everything in words felt like I was cutting into myself punishing myself for what I'd let myself do. I was still conflicted there was no point in denying that sexually Goodfellow was extremely appealing not to mention talented but I didn't want it. In my mind that was all that mattered.<br/><br/>Chain smoking for an hour not bothering to open a window not caring if I was caught I finished my entry and fell asleep curled up in the chain the blanket wrapped around me and the laptop open on the table  beside me music playing softly coming from the laptops speakers.<br/>