<strong>CAP'N BERT - TAKING STOCK ON BOARD THE PRIZE, AND HANDLING PRECIOUS CARGO</strong><br/><br/><strong>"Yo ho ho, arsehole!"</strong>I shouted as I took off a snarling head with my boarding axe, and fired the last of my pistols in the face of an Englishman who was loudly and messily missing his arm, to put him out of his misery. Our attack had broken what resistance the English sailors put up. Now where was the captain, and what goodies were they carrying for us?<br/><br/>I threw my hat jauntily into the air and caught it on the bloodstained blade of my axe.<strong>"The ship is ours, ladies! Get the rum and medicine chest out of the hold, and let's see what other treasures we have here."</strong>I wiped something sticky from my forehead. Oh dear, that would probably leave a nasty stain. Someone had already spilled their guts down my jacket, and there was a nasty rip in the sleeve where it had caught on the tip of someone's cutlass. Christ, the hardships of a life at sea.<br/><br/>The quarterdeck day cabin of the ship was  a shambles, and the jug of wine on the table was almost empty, probably abandoned around the time we opened fire. I swirled the glass or so left in the jug in front of the window and took a sip. Not bad. I headed down to the hold, and inspected the freight. The usual, really. Enough barrels of rum to keep a few dozen men shitfaced for a year, a few crates of muskets, and for some reason, several boxes stamped 'Trudgewell & Clodhopper Patent Leather Boots' stacked up to the low ceiling. I took the megaphone from my belt and shouted up for Achmed, Salim, Khalufu and Malik, the six foot picanninies.<strong>"Porters! Bring the goodies to our ship, and try not to drink straight from the barrels."</strong>The small, heavy chest of silver the ship was carrying to trade was a bit valuable to trust to them, so I took it with me.<br/><br/>I climbed back up on deck, swung across to the Courtesan by a loose piece of rigging, ignoring the chaos of my celebrating crew for now, and headed to the blacksmith's workshop.<strong>"Drake! I hope you didn't get to bored down here. Can you head over to the merchantman we just captured and see what repairs need to be made? I'd like it fit to sell to Crazy Knock Down Prices Pierre by the time we get back into port. On your way!"</strong><br/><br/>When I got back up on the quarterdeck, I was pleasantly taken aback by the sight that awaited me.<br/><br/><strong>"Good catch Ailsa!"</strong>I exclaimed, spinning my axe around my hand by a leather strap on the handle. It looked like our assault cook had stumbled on some valuable cargo. An English rose, all alone at see with just a handmaiden for company! That would keep the lads' hands off Fara and Blackbird for a bit. She'd make a nice change from those ghastly cheap whores of Libertatia, to be sure!<strong>"You there, in the £20 dress! What are you doing on a seedy hulk like this? Going somewhere important?"</strong>I called down to her, taking off my hat. I walked down the steps and stepped into the circle of my crew, surrounding and leering at our new captives. I nodded smugly at the sailors, and kissed the patrician's daughter's hand, putting down the case of silver.<br/><br/><strong>"I'm Captain Griffiths, my lovely. I see you've already met my cook Ailsa. Good thing you didn't run into one of my German marines, they can be quite rough and don't appreciate haute couture as much as I do,"</strong>I winked at Ailsa.<br/><br/>Khalufu walked past over the gangplank, carrying one of the barrels and shouting at his colleagues to shake a leg in African.<strong>"Wha' Cap'n, no cabin boys wi' round asses an' no hair on deir balls?"</strong>he complained.