<em><span class="bbc_font" style="font-family: comic sans ms;">Dearest Lara,<br/><br/>        I read your last letter several times, it took a while to sink in properly. It was almost as if my dreams were speaking from your hand. Although you have known of my longing for children, for a family, for belonging, there is something about me that I have not been able to be quite so open about and that is my need for a man, and how much I  have missed my marriage bed. Although I know I have mentioned it, I was even starting to think about doing things that would have been unsafe and downright sinful.  To be able to help you, my dearest friend, and Luke, and at the same time find the fulfillment I have been yearning for seems like a dream come true.<br/>        Of course I paced the floor quite a bit, yes I still do that dear friend, wondering about all it would mean for the three of us. After careful soul searching I realised that the important thing was our love and friendship and how easily I know I will love your children. I think too that the one thing we have never lost, even with the miles between us, is our honesty and just how well we know each other. I think that will be why this could work, and work well for us all, I pray so.<br/>        Rob Golding offered yet again to buy the farm just the day after your letter, and this time I accepted. It was as if a huge weight had lifted from my shoulders. I wished you had been there to dance a jig with, for that is what I felt like doing.  It will take but a few weeks to sort out my affairs here, and then travel to you.  <br/>        You have always been the sister of my heart, and I will be proud to call you 'Sister' Lara, and be an aunt to your children and share both the work and the joys of your life.  I will telegraph the date of my arrival and in the meantime thank you dear friend for this gift of a new life with you.<br/><br/>In Love and Friendship Rachel x x x </span></em><br/><br/><br/><div align="center">(http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz222/DiverseDesires/RachelXandiarrangement.jpg)</div><br/><br/>Mostly it was excitement, but Rachel knew just how much nerves also played a part in the dancing within her tummy. Considering what she was venturing, she didn't think she was doing that badly. The rumbling of the train had already even lulled her to sleep at one point, and she had woken stiff and disoriented for a while. She had left behind some good friends and some good memories, but none as good as the friend she was traveling to nor the memories she hoped to create in the future.<br/><br/>Her heart warmed just thinking of the children. She had lived alone for too long now, and in the longer nights had longed for the noises of a family in the darkness. Somehow it had been even harder then, not the table laid for one, nor one person's washing on the line. It was the sound of the silence, the nights of loneliness and longing that were the hardest to bear.<br/><br/>She also glowed with happiness at being able to see her friend again. She didn't know just what had drawn them together and fastened such strong bonds between them, but Lara was her rock and had helped her through so much. She was such a strong woman, she always had been. She'd protected Rachel, taught, loved her when no-one else had, she owed her so much.<br/><br/>But that was something that also had her worried, that made the nervousness deeper. The fact that Lara was the kind of woman she was, and as far as Luke was concerned, Rachel was almost her antithesis, so she wasn't sure at all that Lara's idea of Luke being attracted to her seemed, well, likely. She knew that she was quiet, reserved, she had strength when she needed it, but she wasn't vivacious and pretty like her friend. Lara had always sparkled, she was a leader, all woman. Whereas herself...... well, that was an entirely different matter, and even in looks they were opposites. Her fingers tightened in her palm, she just had to be brave, and face what ever happened. The money from the sale of the farm was safely in the bank, which meant she had some starting up money if Luke decided she couldn't stay.<br/><br/>Standing on the platform, clutching her carpet bag in one hand, watching the men unload her two trunks and the large crate gave her even more butterflies, both because it would be so easy to break what was inside it, but also as she had not had time to warn Lara for permission to bring her precious clavichord. The air was dusty and hot, it even smelled hot. It was such a different smell to home she thought, now she had to get used to a home that had different challenges and although the air wasn't sharp and pure, it also wasn't cold and didn't freeze her bones.<br/><br/>She smiled as she thought of the joy of no longer having to dig out the snow, everything had it's plus points, she'd rather have the trickle of sweat down her back than iced over water in the morning any day.