<div class="quoteheader"><div class="topslice_quote"><a href="https://elliquiy.com/forums/index.php?topic=205809.msg10284356#msg10284356">Quote from: AmberStarfire on 21-07-2014, 12:59:19</a></div></div><blockquote class="bbc_standard_quote">Aiden: My understanding is most of those groups are on Fetlife. Your friend's wife may have connections - if she's into it, she probably does, but it may depend on your um freedoms. :)<br/><br/>Caela: That sounds like quite a night! I've always wondered what goes on at those parties.<br/><br/>We've been to the munches here over the last couple of yrs. It's a relatively small city and there is a munch group, so maybe there is one there and you just don't know about it? <br/><br/>I've stopped going though, as they make me a bit uncomfortable. They're just drink meet-ups, though there are much larger events in another city a couple of hours away and I know there have been play parties, which I haven't been to. I think in many cases there are similar people there to who I'd meet on E and I ran into a guy there once who was in my web design class, and I had no idea he went too. It just makes me a bit uncomfortable. Like people are wondering what I'm into or whether I would have sex with them. I have no interest in discussing my sex life or experimenting outside my marriage in the RL sense. I have already done that and I know where it got me. My husband really loves the munches though so he goes along by himself now on the weekends he isn't busy. I may start going again - but I don't know. It just really puts me on my guard, though I know it doesn't really need to.<br/></blockquote><div class="quotefooter"><div class="botslice_quote"></div></div><br/><div class="spoiler_container"><div class="spoiler_header" onclick="hideSecond (this);" role="button">What happens at parties</div><div class="spoiler_body">What goes on at the parties really depends on the people there. Ours are held at a friend of mine's house and she is fairly selective about who she invites because she doesn't want drama in her home or skeevy people knowing where she lives! That being said, those of us that she trusts are allowed to bring new people so long as we let her know beforehand and new folks aren't actually allowed to play in full on scenes for a couple of parties (they can experiment a bit and learn things certainly though!) in order to build some basic trust with the hosts. Our parties are also usually pot-luck so everyone brings something to eat or drink and the food and basic chatting stays upstairs while the playing happens downstairs, so there's no actual need to see anything you don't want to see. :) We've usually got a few different stations set up. A cross, a table for fire/wax play (mostly gets used for fire-cupping) a couple of spanking benches, and a cushy mattress or couches to cuddle on for aftercare and there are always cleaning wipes nearby for when you finish up a scene and it's time to clean up. Since it's pretty much a core group of people, we don't have an official DM but you can <em>always</em> go to the hosts or one of our resident vikings (we have a few guys that are like 6'3 and very solid!) if there is a problem. <br/><br/>And then we play! :D What sort of play depends on what folks have negotiated. My toppy type is more "hands on" and uses a lot of nails and teeth but he also enjoys pulling out a few floggers and a couple of knives and knows I have a distinct fondness for pinwheels so those usually come out too. His knives <em>don't</em> have an edge on them, but when you skin is already tender and the endorphins are running the mind fuck is that it <em>feels</em> like it has an edge on it even when you know better! lol <br/><br/>I mentioned the fire-cupping, sometimes there's wax, a couple of folks really like canes. I can't speak for anywhere else, but our female Tops seem to get more vicious and gleeful, at the same time, than our males do and a couple of them downright scare me when they are playing! lol Not that they are doing anything any more dangerous than anyone else, they just pull more from their particular bottoms than I know I could handle right now. :)</div></div><br/>Amber, I'm sorry you're not comfortable at your local munches. Most of us don't drink at ours, though the main munch is held in the private room at a local sports bar. We're lucky in that we've gotten large enough to have a few other meet-ups as well that are smaller than the main munch and held in different places so there is, usually, something for everyone. The other meet-ups are smaller and the regular ones are a "craft-night" which ends up being mostly women and a "game night" at one of the local game shops. We also have a local TNG who does various meet-ups but by the time that got started I would have aged out in a couple of years so I've never done things with them but they seem busy.