<div class="floatright">(https://elliquiy.com/elluiki/images/3/35/YellowAjah.jpg)</div><strong>Character name:</strong>Shayella Adair<br/><strong>Position:</strong>Sister, Yellow Ajah<br/><strong>Bondmate:</strong>None<br/><strong>Tag:</strong>Kalain, Closed<br/><strong>Time:</strong>Evening, Saven 7th, 990NE<br/><strong>Place:</strong>Private Room - Infirmary<br/><strong>Warning:</strong><br/><hr/>Shayella’s brows rose slightly as he spoke a bit about the dance.  She hadn’t been sure that Kalain would bother answering the question.  From his perspective, it likely seemed unimportant and irrelevant to the larger conversation but to her it was important.  A sign that he was starting to allow Moira in a bit.  She was also impressed that he hadn’t immediately pinned the dance on his duties to his bondmate.  Noting that he didn’t comment on the rest of their evening, she let it go for the time being.  There would be time to circle back to that later.  While Shayella rarely tried to push for answers, she rarely forgot what had been overlooked and circled back to it eventually.<br/><br/>“Many are afraid, Kalain.”  Shayella mentioned, her voice gentle.  Though she noted that he had not only used a nickname for her but that it hadn’t been sarcastic or snide, she didn’t address that at this time either.  Instead, she focused on what he said and the nuggets of truth he spoke.  “A Gaidin surviving the death of an Aes Sedai is incredibly rare and no one knows what to expect.”  She paused, pondering, “I’m not excusing the looks you get nor the behavior of some of the Aes Sedai but simply attempting to explain.  No one knows what, if any, long term effects this might have.  It creates fear and it’s not something that many like to admit to.”  She added.  For herself, she didn’t agree with some of the decisions that had been made regarding Kalain but she also understood that there was an element of danger associated with the loss of a bondmate.  Leaning forward a bit in the chair, her lips curved into a small smile.  “Do you know why I am not afraid?”  She asked but didn’t wait to get an answer.  “While you might hold a good deal of bitterness toward Aes Sedai and the White Tower as a whole, when given the chance to harm anyone, you have not done so.  Even when provoked.”  She answered her own question, her mind turning toward the match with Theraeve.  “Moira is in good health, you’ve never made a move to attack me even though I can infuriate you at times, and, if rumor is correct, your temper didn’t snap the leash even when a Red Sister attacked you after the sparring session was already over.”<br/><br/>Meeting his gaze, her blue eyes serious, she made a decision and took a deep breath.  “You’ve mentioned that you feel as though others look at you with questions about why you survived when Elaine didn’t.”  She paused, “What do<em>you</em>think about your survival?”  She asked carefully and as compassionately as she could without skirting the question.  She suspected he had a good deal of survivors guilt and likely projected that onto some of those that looked at him.  She also suspected that there was some truth to his words and that some did have that exact question.<br/><br/>It was of no surprise to Shayella that their conversation veered toward the Tower and Aes Sedai again.  She was also not unaware that he often diverted the conversation to an external source when he could.  Though, even when he did so, he always gave her greater insights into how he was feeling.  Little tidbits that she could address.  “In the borderlands, a soldier that can no longer fight but is still alive would often be given a position in which they could still be a part of the fight but in a different way.”  She mused, “It would likely not be nearly as satisfying as the task they had before but it is an attempt to continue to give them purpose.”  She paused.  “The Tower is the same way.  There are times that a person, for various reasons, can no longer perform the tasks that they had in the past and are given other opportunities.”  Her brows knit together as she continued, “I understand why you feel the way you so about it and, to be honest, it can seem utterly cold at times.  If I lost my ability to channel and help people with the One Power, I would no longer be the asset to the Tower that I am now.  The Tower might find me a place somewhere in which my skills with healing, outside of the One Power, would be of use but I wouldn’t be where I am now.”  Again, Shayella didn’t disagree with his harsh statements or judge him for feeling the way he did.  As a matter of fact, she felt he had a point.  “I know it likely matters very little to you but there are some of us that see you as more than a sword and shield.”  She pondered for a moment, "All that being said, how do you feel about being the Master of Arms?  Do you believe that it's a position you deserve?"  She asked the questions, still being straightforward though she had no doubt his answer would tell her much.  With the loss of Elaine, he might question his own right to be the Master of Arms.  Though she, and the Tower, believed him to be an excellent Master of Arms, he might doubt it as he was training the future Gaidin.  Training them to give their lives for an Aes Sedai when he hadn't been able to do as such.<br/><br/>Listening, Shayella sat just a bit straighter as he spoke about having her here.  It was an opportunity that she had considered but, as the sessions were for him rather than both of them, Shayella had never suggested it aloud.  Internally pouncing on the train of thought, she was about to speak but he continued.  Letting him speak without interrupting, until he had even covered the differences between Elaine and Moira, she circled back to the very thing he wished her to ignore.<br/><br/>“I will address your questions in a moment as I was listening to every word you said.  However, I would like to discuss the potential you brought up.”  She cocked her head, “Do you believe that having Moira here might help?”  She asked though she wasn’t entirely sure, even with how honest they had both been this session, he would answer the question honestly.  If he answered at all.  Regardless, she couldn’t just let the opportunity he provided pass without any sort of discussion.  “Personally, I think it might benefit both of you.  You and I have been working together for a year now and, if you’re open to it, I think having your bondmate present would be an excellent next step.”