Here begins the unofficial record of dubious actions undertaken by various rascals in the Western Lands of Talislanta, put to record by order of His Illuminated Impressiveness, Lord K'thamb of Hajjin, this year of (redacted) to preserve forever the shame and inexcusable actions of the barbarians involved.<br/><br/><br/><br/>Editor's Note<br/><em>Most scribes believe this document to be the lunatic ravings of one Erd Guilishwinson, a particularly obnoxious example of a layabout, bawd, and tapster come late to the more refined occupation of chronicler, but Umm of Umbridge and his companion Mod Hattir hold that there were several authors and that the uneven style was due to an unknown party attempting to edit the scattered fragments of record into a coherent whole.</em>