I ruin developers’ lives with my code reviews and I'm sorry
This guy sounds like a massive, toxic asshole.<p>I'm tired of dealing with people like this. It does not have to be this hard. Tech companies should fire more people just for being jerks.<p>> I was mad that, while I spent my nights learning F#, my daughter started calling everyone around “fathers”.<p>Huh, you mean missing out on the good parts of life while martyring yourself for a company that does not give a shit about you can lead to resentment and toxic work culture? YOU. DON'T. SAY.<p>Honestly, a lot of the time management will stoke the  "hero coders" ego so they will do the free work.<p>Management: Oh, Hero Protagonist! We need you! How will we ever earn enough to give our CEO the 15 million bonus if you do not martyr yourself for this feature?<p>Hero Protagonist: They're right. I am the best and smartest. I better dump all of my emotional labor onto my coworkers and significant others and bury myself into doing free work for my company.<p>>  When you work as a developer, you always have to argue. You, as a team, arrive on a solution after a lot of argument, even though we call them “discussions”.<p>I do not feel this way at all. There are productive ways to have discussions that do not involve getting defensive and arguing.<p>The fact that you have to drag all of your discussions into toxic arguments in order to save face is... sad.<p>> And yet it’s somehow important than your arguments “win” more often than not, just to feel good and confident in your power.<p>No, it is not. That is just how you feel to justify your constant toxicity.<p>I see very little "power" in bullying all of the other developers on my team into following my opinions.