Beyond small talk: Study finds people enjoy deep conversations with strangers
What's liberating about talking with strangers is they don't know who you are, where you came from, what you've done, what you haven't done, who you know, or what you're like.<p>You can say whatever you say knowing you can't be judged by or held to some constraint from the past.<p>If your views on euthanasia are changing, because you suddenly have a close elderly relative or an associate whose circumstances are changing, a stranger won't berate you for having attended church for most of your life, even though you advocated the church's ideals which included no support for euthanasia.  You can just talk about that subject in the context of your current circumstances, needs, and beliefs.<p>That's liberating and likely to be informative.<p>If you want to try out or finesse a different political point of view, such as that capital gains should be taxed more or less, or the death penalty is immoral, or social security should be limited to people who have worked and paid taxes for a minimum of 7 years, you can try that with a stranger and just listen to what they say, without having to assure them that you are from a friendly tribe or that you have an open mind, because they won't know your income or your status or your voting record.<p>When you speak points of view in an anonymous guise, or at least, one that isn't tethered to any prior baggage, you gain an opportunity to refresh your understanding in ways that you normally don't get from people who have such well developed expectations about you that they can't really hear what you are saying.<p>The same is true in deeply personal matters such as affairs of the heart, and confessions of moral confusion and even complicity in crimes. For many people, it's not until they hear someone's completely independent echo of a picture they've painted of themself that they begin to see themselves in a different light.<p>The great thing about this process is it isn't limited to one stranger, in the same way that your conversations with your bff is limited to only your bff.<p>Strangers are everywhere, and once you know how to strike up a meaningful conversation with them, you can do it again and again.<p>If you've never had this kind of conversation with a stranger, how can you be sure you know who you are?