Ask HN: Exercises to think, then speak, more clearly?
I used to take the Chicago Metra and ride in the vestibule to exit the train quickly. The same 8 people would always be there every day but this gentleman, "Gary", would always carry the conversations.<p>People were just drawn to him and I was in awe of how he captivated us with his stories. I was able to study him for a couple of years and came up with a list of how he was able to hold our attention:<p>1) Gary spoke loud (he had to since we were in the train entryway) but did not shout.<p>2) He adjusted his tempo of speaking to match the urgency of his story. Just like a good song, he had noticeably different ways of expressing himself.<p>3) Just as he adjusted his speaking, his hand movements and facial expressions also supported his story telling.<p>4) He was older (maybe early 60s) so he had a lot of life experience.<p>5) He was not condescending or patronizing. He was very empathetic with his audience and the stories he told. You could tell that he really cared about the subjects of his stories and how we could relate to them.<p>6) He knew everyone's name. So when he talked to you he would use your name a lot.<p>7) He always was to the point. He didn't meander or deviate from his train of thought. Every story had a build-up and a conclusion.<p>8) He was very funny without being mean. Sort of like Cosby before we found out what Cosby was really like.<p>9) He was always happy. He loved his job and his family and he was nearing retirement (he told us this). His happiness was infectious.<p>10) He was always asking questions. Sometimes, I'd get to the train early and it would just be me and him. He'd always ask about my day, any interesting projects, etc. He would then comment on what he had for lunch ("Have you ever had the Chicken Vesuvio?" he asked) and go on about an experience he had at an awesome restaurant.<p>After two years I had to stop taking the train, but I'd sometimes hear about Gary from a friend. He did retire a couple of years later and moved somewhere warmer. I've always read articles about excellent speakers, but then I always think that I was fortunate to learn from Gary.