Staring into the abyss as a core life skill
A bit over 10 years ago I was still an evangelical Christian. I decided to ask myself, &quot;What&#x27;s the most logical way to live in light of your religious beliefs? Why aren&#x27;t you living that way?&quot;<p>That line of questioning was scary, but also invigorating. Scary, because it probably meant leaving behind a cushy tech job. Invigorating, because I imagined I&#x27;d end up as a missionary somewhere, which is a pretty amazing life if you really believe that Christianity is true.<p>After 18 months of staring into the abyss, I wasn&#x27;t a Christian anymore. It was the hardest and most important thing I&#x27;ve ever done.<p>Two things made the journey possible:<p>1. I made it impossible to stop. I&#x27;d decided that I wanted to live as consistently as possible with my beliefs, so I couldn&#x27;t stop until I knew what those beliefs were. The only possible outcomes were a) missionary, or b) non-Christian.<p>2. I found others who went through the same thing. A few were friends, but most were authors or random people online who wrote about their experience, like lukeprog on lesswrong.com.