Ask HN: Why is machine learning easier to learn than basic social skills?
In my experience the key to social interaction is the ability and willingness to focus on how the other person might feel about what is happening right now. Or to put it another way, putting yourself in the other person&#x27;s shoes.<p>To be an expert is to even listen to your own words as you say them and make a judgement about what others are hearing. It helps to have an encyclopedia like memory of the circumstances and events in the lives of those you interact with. And, to understand what it must be like to be, say, a frail old lady.<p>Sounds impossible? You are probably right. Most of us struggle with those things. Some have it naturally. For some reason women tend to be better than men.<p>Can you learn it? Yes, but like learning chess, you won&#x27;t be a grand master. Just get out amongst people and practice.<p>As a start, people love to feel better about themselves. Look for opportunities to build them up. If people say something stupid, say nothing if you can&#x27;t say something kind. If you leave a conversation having made someone else feel better, count that as a win.<p>Hope that helps.<p>As for me, I have had chronic fatigue for about 5 years. Before that I communicated pretty well. Since then I find the mental exercise required exhausts me, which is how I have become so conscious of it.