Tell HN: Recommendations of mental/physical preparations for would-be fathers
1.5 Please recognize that depression is going to hit you.<p>Explanation: If you are like me, you will almost certain get hit by depression because everything is going against your characteristics. Depression may also hit your wife too. Please make appointments BEFORE it hits either of you. Worst (or best?) case, you don&#x27;t get hit by depression and can simply cancel the appointments.<p>I&#x27;d also like to add that depression is particularly nasty because it DEMOBILIZES you. You don&#x27;t WANT to do exercises. You don&#x27;t WANT to see a doctor. People who never got depression will never understand this. You need something to bootstrap you, to pull you from the mud so that you can at least seek some help. That&#x27;s why I asked you to make appointment BEFORE anything happens.<p>PART 2: Physical preparations<p>2.1 Taking care of kid(s) is very physically demanding<p>Explanation: You need to carry them around for hours. You need to struggle with them when they do not want to eat&#x2F;sleep&#x2F;wear clothes&#x2F;whatever that ordinary humans do. They will NEVER hesitate to use 150% of their strength, and trust me it is very physically demanding. My son is only 3 but it already takes two of us to put clothes on him when he is struggling.<p>PLUS you don&#x27;t get good sleep on top of everything else. You are going to get arm pain, back pain and all sorts of stuffs that you believe that only older people get. AND you won&#x27;t have the time to cure them properly, because you have work to do and kids don&#x27;t pause themselves.<p>2.2 Playing with kid(s) is very physically demanding<p>Explanation: Kids don&#x27;t stop. Whence they can crawl they will crawl all over the place. Once they can walk they will try running down the hall. Once they can run they will happily run into cars&#x2F;walls&#x2F;rains&#x2F;thunders&#x2F;demons&#x2F;whatever they are not supposed to run into. It is your job to watch them. And they don&#x27;t care whether you are sick or not.<p>They can&#x27;t be bargained with. They can&#x27;t be reasoned with. They don&#x27;t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop... ever, until they are completely exhausted!<p>2.3 Taking care of sick kid(s) is even more physically demanding<p>Explanation: I guess you already understand this so I don&#x27;t need to elaborate this point. Just pray that you can get through ER as quickly as possible, and pray that your kids do not need to stay at hospital&#x2F;home for too many days. Always reserve a few sick days&#x2F;vacations when the season changes. September and January are particularly bad!<p>2.4 Exercise as soon&#x2F;often as possible<p>Naturally this leads to the conclusion that you need to shape up as quickly as possible. You still have 7-8 months. You still have enough time to shave off 20-30 pounds of fat and add a few pounds of muscles. Draft up a plan and start from TODAY! Consult a physician if you are overweight to protect your knees. There is a tough fight of X years ahead of you so get up and move.<p>2.5 Get as many medical examinations as possible<p>People tend to skip medical examinations. But you really should have a full check-out before the event. You need to know your weaknesses before they remind you of their existence. Ask for an extensive blood test and other tests (e.g. check your joints). Stick to it and make plans if you find anything bad.<p>PART 3: Misc. thoughts<p>3.1 You should ask for help as soon as possible.<p>Explanation: Grow a thick skin. Ask your friends for used toys and clothes. They are fine as long as they are clean. You can save thousands of bucks by doing that. Ask your parents for help. They don&#x27;t have to but tell them it means a lot to them, plus they get to play with grand children. SAVE every bit of $$ and energy and time you can. You can also ask them for experience but know that every family differs so take it with a grain of salt.<p>3.2 Read some books and get prepared.<p>Explanation: You don&#x27;t have to know everything beforehand, because you can&#x27;t. Just prepare for the first 3-6 months and you are good to go. Know symptoms of common sickness and buy supplies beforehand. Learn first-aid if you have the means. It&#x27;s going to be tremendously helpful.<p>3.3 Make sure that your home is well prepared.<p>Explanation: Humans tend to skip maintenance of their houses. If you know of a water leak, or a roof leak, or whatever that may pose inconvenience or even danger to the new born, get it fixed immediately. You don&#x27;t really want to deal with it in the first few months.<p>3.4 Know about the surroundings and others<p>Explanation: Know where the parks are. Are they safe? Did your kid have a pediatric? Did you phone the daycares to book for a space? (In Canada we usually call and make space as early as possible because it takes years to get a space) Do you know other would-be parents in the area, and if you do are you going to socialize with them? Do you know how to drive? Did you get a license and a car? Having a car is super convenient for would-be parents no matter of the status of public transportation.<p>----------------------<p>These are all of my thoughts right now. Good luck.