What I have learned from my suicidal patients
&gt; To feel depressed about the state of your life is to demonstrate capacity to imagine something different, and that spark of imagination can prove a motive to change.<p>This was arguably true for me, but not in a good way. I&#x27;m pretty sure that I started having intrusive suicidal thoughts <i>because</i> my depression had motivated me to try to change. Said changes utterly failed to even make a dent in my depression, finally convincing me that nothing I did would ever make me feel good again (this was after multiple trials of antidepressants and talk therapy over the course of 10+ years; it&#x27;s not like this was the first thing I tried).<p>All the generic &quot;there is hope&quot; and &quot;antidepressants really work&quot; and &quot;go to therapy&quot; talk that tends to surround mental illness discussion really bugs me because virtually nobody acknowledges the damage that&#x27;s done when these things fail (and they fail frequently). It doesn&#x27;t just damage trust in mental health professionals, it hurts the credibility of recovery as a concept.