An alternative argument for why women leave STEM
I can&#x27;t speak for women, and I&#x27;m just smart enough not to try.<p>But what I can say is that I don&#x27;t hold all of the values that I did as a young man. I&#x27;m not excited about the same things, and today I find some of those ideas uncomfortably naive or even off-putting.<p>As I&#x27;ve engaged in more activities, as I&#x27;ve socialized with more people, I&#x27;ve encountered many more ideas and a lot of nuance. Nothing has simple answers and there are other solutions to problems besides code, or tools, or pills, or surgery.<p>And one of the consequences of this is that I&#x27;m not confident that if I show up to interview at a startup that I&#x27;m going to exhibit the degree of &#x27;passion&#x27; they&#x27;re looking for. I have plenty of passion. Too much, some will tell you.  I just know beyond all doubt that your new iOS app is not going to save the world, and quite bluntly, that you have some unresolved issues that you need to work through if you so desperately need to believe how transformative your work is going to be. And I know that&#x27;s not just STEM - all the 20-somethings who I&#x27;ve seen doing volunteer work - and bless you for showing up - feel exactly the same way. I&#x27;m gonna change the world. I <i>have</i> to change the world. Otherwise my life is empty and I am nothing.<p>It can be discomfiting to be around and I&#x27;m sure I telegraph it.<p>They say that young women socialize a little ahead of young men. Maybe they just get a whiff of my reality before all the rhetoric gets piled on so thick that&#x27;s all they can see.