November 2, 2016 at 10:51 am 71 comments
For Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Challenge: 4 November 2016
Photo Credit: Jean L. Hays
"Hurry up, bitch," her husband yelled from the living room sofa. "I'm hungry."
"Patience, patience" Dolores muttered to herself in the kitchen, wiping away the sweat from her brow.
After 40 years of marriage, the strain on her face said it all. She could no longer bear the physical and verbal abuse that continued even after he had a stroke that made him totally dependent on her.
Dolores noticed her husband slowly getting weaker after she started lacing his food with antifreeze she bought from the convenience store recently.
Tonight, she was preparing his favorite steak and potatoes for dinner.
Entry filed under: Blogroll, friday fictioneers. Tags: 100-word challenge, fiction, relationships.
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1. Gbolabo Adetunji | November 2, 2016 at 11:09 am
The part where she reassures herself about the benefit of being patient while slowly committing a menacing act is truly chilling. It's a very nice story.
2. plaridel | November 2, 2016 at 1:54 pm
gbolabo:
he deserves what he's getting. thank you.
3. Björn Rudberg (brudberg) | November 2, 2016 at 1:44 pm
I shouldn't feel sympathetic towards a murderess but I do… is the steak gonna finish him off?
björn:
not yet. she's taking it slow to cover her tracks.
5. Iain Kelly | November 2, 2016 at 1:59 pm
Great take. Quite chilling in her matter-of-fact way of murdering him, but I think she has been plotting a way out for a while.
6. plaridel | November 2, 2016 at 11:08 pm
iain:
you can say that again.
7. TraceyDelaplainMD.com | November 2, 2016 at 7:51 pm
OMG I would have used faster poison, just saying.
tracey:
patience is her middle name.
9. TraceyDelaplainMD.com | November 3, 2016 at 10:05 am
I see that. I've never been accused of patience.
10. plaridel | November 3, 2016 at 3:56 pm
sometimes, a little patience is good. for example, waiting for a table at a popular restaurant to enjoy a great dining experience.
11. ceayr | November 3, 2016 at 5:41 am
Thanks for your caring input, Doc!
12. Dale | November 3, 2016 at 7:20 am
Ha ha! Dolores ain't getting any younger… I'm with Tracey!
13. rgayer55 | November 4, 2016 at 11:11 am
Take out is sounding better all the time.
14. Lata Sunil | November 2, 2016 at 9:10 pm
Aw.. too much patience.
15. plaridel | November 2, 2016 at 11:08 pm
lata:
just trying to play it safe.
16. Sandra | November 3, 2016 at 4:09 am
Steak and potatoes, with just a dash of poison. That woman is truly cooking.
17. plaridel | November 3, 2016 at 9:21 am
indeed, there's no way stopping her now.
18. draliman | November 3, 2016 at 4:47 am
I can't say I feel sorry for him.
draliman:
i share the feeling.
Good story, the worm turns
ceayr:
he deserves whatever is served on the table.
22. Lizy | November 3, 2016 at 5:58 am
Cold. If he can't even cook for himself, abandoning him would be easier – no murder charge haunting the rest of her life!
lizy:
that's very true. at the same time, she feels trapped like a bird for so long that even if you let the cage open it won't fly away.
Well done, Plaridel!
dale:
thank you. i'm glad you liked it.
26. neelwritesblog | November 3, 2016 at 7:32 am
Take a bow! Well written, spine chilling. For once, we know who the protagonist is, don't we?
neel:
a very generous compliment. thank you.
28. rochellewisoff | November 3, 2016 at 2:05 pm
"Here, dear, have a little extra steak sauce."
Perhaps she's just a little sadistic in addition to patient. After years of that kind of abuse, I don't blame her. Well done.
rochelle:
that'll work. maybe he's appreciate her more. 🙂
30. aliciajamtaas | November 3, 2016 at 5:23 pm
Hell hath no fury . . . I enjoyed where you took this. Definitely on the dark side. Alicia
alicia:
i have a rule that i follow. always be kind to those who prepare and serve your meal especially when dining out.
Oh, an excellent rule indeed.
yes, you think you're in charge but they are. if you're rude to them, they can put something extra in your food without your knowledge.
34. Keith's Ramblings | November 4, 2016 at 8:05 am
The last supper of a condemned man maybe! Excellent
My silly story!
keith:
not yet! she was enjoying every moment.
36. Maddie's Mama | November 4, 2016 at 9:05 am
I love how she keeps saying patience… what a great play on the word: he should have had more patience, she's keeping hers as she ensures her freedom. Great story
maddie's mama:
you're very perceptive. thank you for taking the time to read my story.
38. Indira | November 4, 2016 at 9:46 am
Great story. Chilling. Very well written. You are so right. people who become dependent often become menacing. Being patient with them is a hard task.
indira:
he was like that even before he was confined in a wheel chair. it was time for her to return the favor.
40. Indira | November 4, 2016 at 8:55 pm
Then he deserves this.
he does… many times over.
Well, he can't do much to her now (other than verbally). I say torture him as long as it's fun before finishing him off.
russell:
i'm sure she's getting the kick out of it. 🙂
44. Emily Livingstone | November 4, 2016 at 1:09 pm
That line from her husband hits like a slap as I read it, but it does effectively make me side with her as she poisons him!
emily:
i'm glad it worked the way it was written. thank you.
46. wmqcolby | November 4, 2016 at 2:11 pm
Ohhhh MAN! The lady is going to be SO in trouble after he dies from steak and potatoes poisoning. Nice one!
kent:
maybe, maybe not. antifreeze poisoning can be hard to detect. i'm sure she'll have him cremated. 🙂
The fire'll burn for days — like Dean Martin's liver.
a fitting prelude to hell.
50. Isadora De La Vega | November 4, 2016 at 2:40 pm
Timely piece of writing. She's biding her time. Nicely done ..
isadora:
your comment is much appreciated. thank you.
52. lingeringvisions by Dawn | November 4, 2016 at 11:17 pm
Awww…she made his favorite..last meal..ahahahaha!
dawn:
correction… one of his last meals. 🙂
54. Michael Wynn | November 5, 2016 at 6:06 am
Sounds like he's got it coming and deserves it. I've sen the odd man like this and they are not pleasant, no one will miss him.
mick:
56. michael1148humphris | November 5, 2016 at 4:36 pm
I cant say it better than it has already been said, it's a fine piece of writing. Mike
mike:
thank you for reading. i find your comment very encouraging.
58. gahlearner | November 5, 2016 at 4:45 pm
But murder is wroooong. :O
— Seriously, great story, and who would not feel with her. Eventually the straw breaks the camel's back. Great story.
gahlearner:
sometimes, the end justifies the means. one can only take so much abuse.
60. Amy Reese | November 5, 2016 at 5:36 pm
What a horrible situation. It's pretty tough to care for someone like that. Great writing, Plaridel. Nice job.
thanks for stopping by. deeply appreciate your comment.
62. Dawn Quyle Landau | November 7, 2016 at 9:54 pm
Hard not to empathize with her… sometimes a steak is not just a steak!
thank you for reading. the steak will fill him up.
64. patriciaruthsusan | November 10, 2016 at 1:18 am
That's cold. This is a dark story, Plaridel. I think I'd be able to put up with verbal abuse rather than commit murder. The physical abuse couldn't be too bad if he suffered a stroke. It would be better to put him in a nursing home than going to prison for murder. Good writing. —- Suzanne
i guess that's an option she chose not to take.
66. ladylebz | October 15, 2017 at 9:44 am
I absolutely love this! I'm definitely gonna try out flash fiction, thanks for the inspiration 🙂
67. plaridel | October 15, 2017 at 12:18 pm
ladylebz:
please do. we're glad to welcome you. the picture prompt is posted every wednesday of the week.
Awesome 😊😊 which site is it posted on? Would love to follow so I can get updates…
here's the link: https://rochellewisoff.com/
looking forward to your participation.
Thanks so much 🙏🏾🙏🏾