Transgender man gives birth to baby using sperm from trans woman
By Rob Bailey-Millado
December 30, 2019 | 11:29am	| Updated December 30, 2019 | 1:32pm
Reuben Sharpe (right), who transitioned 12 years ago, with Jay and a sonogram of baby Jamie Gofundme
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Proud papa Reuben Sharpe gave birth to his own baby — with the help of sperm donated by a transgender woman.
The 39-year-old UK native transitioned to a man 12 years ago — but his paternal instincts led him to stop taking testosterone six years ago in hopes of getting pregnant.
Now, Reuben and his non-binary partner Jay, 28 — who doesn't identify as male or female — are being hailed as "Britain's most modern family." Baby Jamie was delivered three months ago — by a transgender doctor, no less — in Brighton, Sussex.
Although a few other UK men have given birth after transitioning, Reuben and Jay are among the first couples to go public, the Sunday Mirror reports.
"It's taken six years to get this far — but now we have a baby in our arms and that was the end goal. I finally feel complete," says wedding photographer Reuben. "It wasn't that I was desperate to have the birthing experience or pregnancy experience, but I wanted a child and I had the facility to do it."
The road to parenthood was just as atypical as one might think: Reuben tells the outlet he began living as a man in 2007 — taking testosterone to develop a deeper voice, facial hair and masculine features.
Still, paternal pangs were undeniable, so he consulted a trusted trans doctor, who reassured Reuben it was possible since he still had a womb and ovaries.
Reuben was three years into his pursuit of parenthood when he met fellow wedding photog Jay — who's undergone top surgery (a double breast removal) and is referred to as "them" or "they" — at a bar. He had no idea if his new love interest even wanted kids.
Reuben Sharpe (left) and his partner Jay are being billed as "Britain's most modern family."Gofundme
"I realized I would have to talk to them, [so] if they didn't want kids, we'd have to break up," Reuben says. "I managed to bring up the subject, but luckily Jay was open to the idea."
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Jay adds, "It just seemed right."
Still, Reuben faced a battery of futile fertility tests and hormone-level checks. At one point, a friend even offered to carry the baby for the struggling couple.
But then, "I woke up the next morning and my period had started for the first time in six years," Reuben says. "It was such a relief. It's weird, but I knew it was the start of something I wanted so badly."
However, one part of the equation was still missing. And as any thoroughly modern family would, they used social media to solve the problem.
"We are both trans [and] non-binary trans and don't have a drop of sperm between us!," Reuben announced on a GoFundMe campaign to raise funds for fertility treatments. "However, we have found a donor from within the Brighton trans community who has amazingly and kindly offered to help with this."
He tells the Mirror, "Sperm donation is a big decision to make — but when we asked the donor, it felt so right."
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It took three rounds of costly treatments — £6,000 or nearly $8,000 USD — to successfully inseminate Reuben's womb. After a surprise positive pregnancy test, they took five more, just to be sure.
After an emotional nine months — and some strange looks in medical waiting rooms — the parents-to-be intended to deliver their baby boy via home birth.
"[But] I ended up being rushed to hospital for a C-section, which was fine, but the recovery was absolutely terrible. I couldn't move for five days," Sharpe tells the Mirror, praising the specially trained midwives at Royal Sussex County Hospital.
Three months later, the couple says they are confident their baby will thrive growing up in their hometown of Brighton, with support from both sets of grandparents.
"It's about having the right kind of community around us so they are able to see different kinds of family set-ups," Jay tells the outlet. "All we can do is try to be really open from the start with them and other people around us — give them the best chance."
Filed under babies , parenthood , transgender , transgender rights
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