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HeshamHaroon

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Egyptian_English_parallel

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ازيكم يا جماعه؟,How are you guys?

عايز احكيلكم حاجه غريبه جداً عنى.,I want to tell you a very funny thing about me.

انا كنت عايش ف السعوديه لفتره طويله جداً لحد ما اتخرجت من الثانويه.,"I was living in Saudi Arabia for a very long time, until I graduated from high school."

بعد التخرج رجعت مصر عشان أدرس فى الكليه، و بقالى دلوقتى اكتر من خمس سنين عايش فى مصر.,"After graduation I came back to Egypt to study in college, and now I have been living in Egypt for over 5 years."

الغريب انى طول الـخمس سنين اللى قضيتهم هنا، و خلال كل الاجازات اللى كنت بزور فيها مصر (لما كنت عايش فى السعوديه).,"The funny thing is that during all the 5 years that I have spent here, and during all the vacations on which I was visiting Egypt (when I was living in Saudi Arabia)."

عمرى ما زرت الاهرامات!,I have never visited the Pyramids!

الاهرامات، و ابو الهول طبعاً، هما اهم و اشهر المعالم السياحيه فى مصر على الإطلاق.,"The Pyramids, and the Sphinx of course, are the most important and famous tourist attractions in Egypt, for sure."

الناس من كل أنحاء العالم ممكن يسافروا لمسافات طويله جداً عشان بس ييجوا و يشوفوهم.,People from all over the world may travel for very long distances only to come and see them.

اكيد معظمكم يعرفهم و يمكن بعضكم زارهم قبل كده.,"Surely most of you know them, and maybe some of you have already visited them."

الاغرب كمان انى عايش فى الجيزه، نفس المحافظه اللى فيها الاهرامات!,"What’s even funnier is that I live in Giza, the same governorate where the Pyramids are located."

المسافه بينى و بين الاهرامات مش هتاخد وقت اكتر من عشرين لتلاتين دقيقه لو انت سايق عربيه.,The distance between me and the Pyramids wouldn’t take more than 20 to 30 minutes if you are driving a car.

الحقيقه انا قريب جداً منهم لدرجه انك ممكن تشوفهم بالعين المجرده من فوق سطح العماره اللى انا ساكن فيها!,Actually I’m so close to them that you can see them with your naked eye from the top of the building that I live in!

و مع ذلك عمرى ما رحت.,And yet I’ve never been.

عشان اكون صريح، انا رحت مره لعرض قريب من الاهرامات اسمه “الصوت و الضوء.,"To be honest, I went once to a show near the Pyramids called “Sound and Light”."

بس برضه كان بعيد الى حد ما.,But still it was kinda far.

مقدرتش آخد صوره جنبهم، و مقدرتش المسهم.,"I couldn’t take a picture near them, and I couldn’t touch them."

عشان كده المره دى مينفعش تتحسب، خصوصاً لواحد مصرى!,"So this does not count, especially for an Egyptian!"

بس خمنوا مين اللى خدنى للعرض ده؟,But guess who took me to that show?

عمتى الامريكيه!,My American aunt!

(زوجة عمى) اللى بتيجى مصر فى بعض الاجازات بس.,(my uncle’s wife) who comes to Egypt on some vacations only.

و مع ذلك زارت الاهرامات اكتر من مره و عارفه المعالم السياحيه فى مصر احسن منى بكتير.,And yet she’s visited the Pyramids more than once and knows the tourist attractions in Egypt much better than me.

حاولت ادور على سبب مقنع ممكن يبرر ليه مزرتش الاهرامات طول المده دى، لكن ملقيتش.,"I tried to look for a convincing reason to justify why I’ve never been to the Pyramids all this time, but I didn’t find any."

بس عارفين المفروض فعلا ادور على ايه؟,But do you know what I should really be looking for?

موبايلى.,My cell phone.

عشان اكلم صحابى و احدد معاد معاهم عشان نروح نزور الاهرامات فى اقرب فرصه.,To call my friends and make plans with them to go visit the Pyramids at the earliest opportunity!

امبارح كان من اسوأ ايام حياتى.,Yesterday was one of the worst days of my life.

اليوم ابتدا بإن امى صحتنى من النوم و قالتلى اصحى علشان تجيب العيش.,"The day started when my mother woke me up and said, “Wake up and go get the bread."

الجمله اللى دايماً مبحبش اسمعها، لكن صحيت و خدت قفص العيش و الجنيه فى جيبى.,"”–a sentence I never like to hear, but I got up and grabbed the bread basket, and [put] a pound in my pocket."

و نزلت رحت للاقرب فرن، جنب بيتنا.,"I went downstairs to the nearest bakery, next to our house."

لقيت الطابور كبير شويه، حوالى خمستاشر واحد.,I found that the line was a bit long–about fifteen people.

قلت مش مشكله.,"I thought, “No problem."

اقف و خلاص اهى كلها ساعه و اجيب العيش و اطلع اكمل نوم.,I’ll just wait for an hour to get the bread and go back upstairs to finish sleeping.

و بعد ما عدت ساعه كنت خلاص اول واحد فى الطابور.,"” After an hour had passed, I was finally at the front of the line."

و فجأه الكهربا قطعت فى الفرن.,And suddenly the electricity went out in the bakery.

و صاحب المحل قال مفيش عيش غير لما الكهربا ترجع.,And the shop owner said there wouldn’t be any more bread until the electricity came back on.

و الجمله دى كانت زى الصفاره اللى بيبدأ بيها الماراثون.,And this sentence was like the whistle that starts a marathon.

جريت فى سباق مع الناس اللى كانت واقفه فى الفرن علشان نروح الفرن التانى اللى فى الشارع اللى بعده.,"I ran in a race with the other people waiting at the bakery to get to the other bakery, which is on the next street."

و لحسن الحظ على بعد ميت متر لقيت الفرن التانى فاضى.,"And luckily, from about a hundred meters away, I saw that the second bakery was empty."

زودت من سرعتى و وقفت اول واحد.,"I increased my speed, and I was the first in line."

و كنت فى منتهى السعاده كإنى كسبت سباق فى الاولمبيات.,"I was over the moon, as if I had won an Olympic race."

و لكن حطيت ادى فى جيبى، ملقيتش الجنيه اللى مكنتش نازل بغيره.,But I put my hand in my pocket and didn’t find the only pound I had brought.

يعنى كل المجهود و السباق اللى انا كسبته راح على الفاضى.,"So, all the effort and the race I won were all for nothing."

و مكانش قدامى غير حل واحد–ملوش تانى– انى ارجع البيت.,"There was only one thing I could do–go back home, so go back home I did."

و فعلاً رجعت البيت و اخدت جنيه تانى و نزلت وقفت فى الطابور من اوله.,I went back and got another pound and went to the bakery and stood in line all over again.

و اتعلمت انى لازم اصحى بدرى علشان اجيب عيش يا إما اخد معايا اكتر من جنيه.,"And I learned that I have to get up early in order to buy bread, or take more than one pound with me."

كنت فى اعدادى لما جربت اسوق عربيه لاول مره.,I was in preparatory school when I tried to drive a car for the first time.

كان عندى حوالى اربعتاشر سنه، و ابويا قرر انه يعلمنى انا و اخويا، الاكبر منى بسنه، ازاى نسوق.,"I was around 14 years old, and my father decided to teach me and my brother, who is one year older than me, how to drive."

انا فاكر اليوم ده كويس اوى.,I remember that day very well.

كنت خايف جداً و اخويا كان بيتعلم اسرع منى بكتير.,I was very scared and my brother was learning much quicker than me.

اتعلمنا الاساسيات و جايه وقت التطبيق.,We learned the basics and it was time to practice.

كان الموضوع ماشى كويس معايا لما بابا كان بيقعد جنبى و انا بسوق، و كنت بتحرك كويس بالعربيه، الى حد ما.,"It was going well for me when my dad was sitting next to me while I was driving, and I was moving well with the car, kinda."

لحد ما فيه مره بابا قالى انى المفروض ابدأ اسوق لوحدى.,"Until one time, my dad told me that I should start driving alone."

اتفقنا انى امشى بالعربيه بالراحه جداً، و هو هيجرى جنبى عشان يدينى تعليمات لو احتاجتها.,"We agreed that I go very slowly with the car, and he would run beside me to keep giving me the instructions if I needed them."

بس مكانش ده بالظبط اللى حصل!,But that was not exactly what happened!

دورت العربيه و بدأت ادوس بنزين، و لما العربيه بدأت تتحرك اتوترت شويه و دست بنزين جامد .,"I started the car, and began to step down on the gas, When the car started to move, I got a bit nervous and I hit the gas harder."

العربيه بدأت تسرع، بابا معرفش يلحقها و بدأ يزعق، و انا بدأت اترعب جداً!,"The car started to speed up, Dad couldn’t keep up with it and started to shout, and I really started to panic!"

لحسن الحظ، افتكرت ادوس على الفرامل قبل ما اوصل لنهاية الشارع، اللى كان طوله حوالى مية متر، و العربيه وقفت اخيراً.,"Luckily, I remembered to hit the brakes before I got to the end of the street, which was around 100 meters long, and the car finally stopped."

طبعاً الموقف ده اثر عليا و فضلت مصدوم طول اليوم ده و بطلت اتدرب على السواقه لفتره.,"Of course, that situation affected me and I remained in shock all that day, and I stopped practicing driving for a while."

بس رجعت اتعلم تانى و اتحسنت جداً، بقيت حتى احسن من اخويا اللى كانت بدايته احسن منى بكتير.,"But I went back to practicing again, and I really improved. I even became better than my brother, who had had a much better start than I did."

انا فاكر برضه انى مره عملت حادثه.,I also remember that I had an accident once.

بس كانت بسيطه الحمد لله.,"But it was a minor one, thank God."

فقدت تركيزى و انا سايق و خبطت عربيه مركونه.,I lost my concentration while driving and hit a parked car.

لكن لحسن الحظ مكنتش ماشى بسرعه اوى و مكانش فيه اضرار كتير.,But luckily I wasn’t going too fast and there wasn’t much damage.

صاحب العربيه كان غضبان جداً فى البدايه لكنه طلع راجل كويس.,"The owner of the car was very angry at first, but he turned out to be a nice guy."

ابويا اتفق معاه انه هيصلحله العربيه و المشكله اتحلت بشكل ودى.,"My father agreed with him that he would fix the car for him, and the problem was settled in a friendly manner."

استمريت فى التدريب و ادائى بدأ يعلى جداً لحد ما بقيت سواق محترف.,I kept practicing and my performance started to get really high until I became a pro at driving.

و بقيت بخرج مع اصحابى كتير بالعربيه و باستخدمها فى معظم مشاويرى.,"I started to go out with my friends by car a lot, and used it for most of my errands."

و طبعاً ابويا و امى استغلوا الموضوع كمان، و بدأوا يبعتونى كتير عشان اشترى حاجات من بره.,"And of course, my father and my mother took advantage of it too, and they started to send me a lot to buy things outside."

الموضوع كان بيبقى مزعج جداً فى بعض الاوقات، بس انا كنت بحب السواقه، و الحقيقه مكانش عندى خيار تانى!,"That was really annoying sometimes. But I liked driving, and I actually had no other choice!"

و زى ما راجل حكيم قال مره: مع القوه الكبيره بتيجى مسؤوليات كبيره!,"And as a wise man once said, “With great power comes great responsibility!"

امبارح اصحابى احتفلوا بعيد ميلادى، مع ان عيد ميلادى مش ميعاده امبارح ولا حتى الشهر ده.,"Yesterday my friends celebrated my birthday, although it wasn’t my birthday yesterday or even this month."

“بس وقت عيد ميلادى كنا كلنا فى امتحانات،” فا ماحتفلوش بيه لاننا كنا مشغولين.,"But at the time of my birthday, we were in exams, so we didn’t celebrate it because we were all busy."

انا اتفاجأت لما وجدت اصحابى بيقولولى هنخرج كلنا مع بعض.,I was surprised when I found my friends telling me that we were all going out together.

و هيبقى يوم مميز، لانه عاده بنتفق على الخروج من قبلها بفتره.,And it was going to be a special day because we usually arrange these things a bit ahead of time.

قالولى فى الطريق انهم هيحتفلوا بعيد ميلادى.,They told me on the way that they are celebrating my birthday.

رحنا دريم بارك مدينة ملاهى و ركبنا الالعاب كلها كلها.,We went to Dream Park and we rode all the rides.

و بعدها ركبت حصان و ركبت جمل.,Then I rode a horse and rode a camel.

و اتصورت مع احلى حيوان انا بحبه، النعامه.,"And then I took a photo with my favorite animal, the ostrich."

كنت عايز اركبها كمان بس قالولى ان ده مستحيل طبعاً.,"I wanted to ride it too, but they told me that was impossible of course."

الحصان كان بنت اسمها بشرى، اسم غريب لحصان بس حلو.,"The horse was a female called “Bushra,” a weird name for a horse but cute."

بعدها رحنا مطعم و كلنا.,"After that, we went to a restaurant and ate."

انا كلت فراخ بالبابريكا و اصحابى كلوا فراخ مقرمشه و همبرجر.,I ate chicken paprika and my friends ate crispy chicken and hamburgers.

و بعدها جابولى التورته اللى كانت حلوه جداً طبعاً.,"Then they got me a cake, which was so good, of course."

و اتصورنا كتير و انبسطنا.,We took a lot of pictures and we had fun.

و فى المطعم دخنا شيشه و شربت شاى مظبوط.,We smoked hookah and I drank sweet tea.

اعتقد ان اصحابك دول احلى نعمه انت ممكن تحصل عليها فى حياتك.,I believe that your friends are the best blessing you can ever get in your life.

واحد من اصحابى اسمه احمد، سورى الجنسيه هو.,"One of my friends, whose name’s Ahmed, is Syrian, "

و برغم اللى بيحصل فى بلده و الدمار و الحرب ساعد فى انه يعمللى عيد ميلاد و يبسطنى.,"and despite what is happening in his country and destruction and the war, he helped to make me a birthday party and make me happy."

امبارح كان يوم مميز و هفضل دايماً فاكره.,Yesterday was a special day and I will always remember it.

و هنفضل نضحك دايماً لما نفتكره.,And we will all laugh when we remember it.

امبارح مع بداية شهر سبتمبر، كان لازم ادفع لابنى مصاريف الشهر الجديد فى الحضانه.,"Yesterday, the beginning of September, I needed to pay for my son’s fees for a new month at pre-school."

و مع تأخير مرتبي، لقيت ان افضل حل انى موديهوش خالص.,"But with my salary not paid yet, I found that the best solution was not to send him [to school] at all."

طب و بعدين؟,"Well, and then?"

قررت آخده معايا الشغل.,I decided to take him with me to work.

طبعا كان قرار ندمت عليه بعد كده.,And of course it was a decision I later regretted.

طول الطريق للشغل فضلت احفظه الوصايا التلاته: النظام، الهدوء، النضافه.,"All the way to my work, I kept dictating him the three commandments: Order, Quiet and Cleanliness."

بصراحه منكرش، الولد كان ملتزم الى حد كبير.,"To be honest, I can’t deny that the boy was committed to a large extent."

طلب نسكويك و مسك الـIPAD و فضل يلعب.,He asked for a Nesquik and held the iPad and kept playing.

اكل سندوتش و شرب عصير و دخل الحمام تمان مرات.,"He ate a sandwich, and drank a juice, and went to the toilet eight times."

كل ده جميل.,All that was okay.