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Cakemixr | 2020-11-01 15:35:08 | 1,604,244,908 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | jm460n | true | null | 19 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/jm460n/im_dating_someone_im_not_attracted_to_what_should/ | 2 | So I should preface this by saying I'm a complete novice when it comes to dating for the most part. So please be kind. Recently I (20M) starting dating this girl (19F) I met on tinder and things have been going pretty well for the most part. She has a great personailty, we have similar interests and we really understand each other. However, I just don't feel attracted to her at all in the romantic sense. I kind of shot myself in the foot here as well because we both discussed what we were looking for out of this and we both said we were looking for a relationship. I did however state that if things didn't work out then I'd be fine with maintaining a friendship with this person. Another problem that's cropped up is that she's the type to message me at least once a day. I on the other hand really dislike texting multiple times a day. Firstly because I really value my alone and despise meaningless small talk over text. I much prefer texting perhaps every two or three days or only to make plans. Secondly, being in my final year of university means I don't have all the time in the world to be texting all day long so I can't be glued to my phone constantly which I really dislike anyway. I do realise however that no-one is busy enough to not spend 30 seconds replying to a text so my last point is not really much of an excuse. But regardless, I find it annoying to be texted on such a frequent basis. Lastly, whenever she messages me, because I feel no attraction towards her I have no desire to message back. But I do anyway because I feel like I'm obliged to do so at this point. It's gotten to the point where I feel like a really terrible person because I'm leading them on without communicating my true thoughs. So essentially, what I'm asking is, how do I communicate to this person that I'm not attracted to them without coming off as a jerk becasue they definately view me in a romantic way? Sorry for the wall of ramble but thanks for reading and I appreaciate any and all responses. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I'm dating someone I'm not attracted to. What should I do? | null | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/jm460n/im_dating_someone_im_not_attracted_to_what_should/ |
WarioCorkscrew | 2023-06-29 00:48:59 | 1,687,999,739 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 14lqh8d | true | null | 2 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/14lqh8d/what_extracurricular_activities_have_good_gender/ | 1 | I (just-turned-31M) am finally getting into the dating scene after years of putting it off for various reasons, big shout out to Covid. Currently experiencing the hell of dating apps, and I figure that it'd be better to go out in order to supplement the process, see if I can eventually find someone by picking up something new. I've searched through the sub and most questions like mine seem to boil down to the OP throwing a pity party or it turns into a radioactive zone; I do have some obstacles that I've identified, but I'm not about that "doomer" lifestyle. Obstacles: \- All of my hobbies are either male dominated and generally viewed as turn-offs by women (video games, I play semi-competitively) or only appeal to more senior individuals (birdwatching). \- My profession is male dominated (software developer) and while it's probably not broadly true, I feel that women on the apps and in real life have a certain mental image of how I'll behave because of the social missteps people in my profession tend to make with the opposite sex. \- I never learned how to ride a bicycle and while I've gotten much stronger from making the gym a more prominent part of my life, I don't have the endurance and disposition for things like marathons. Dancing seems to be a somewhat frequent activity I see on profiles and I'm also not of a dancing disposition (got "two left feet") and a little unwilling to spend on classes or something like that. Given these three points and that I'm in NYC, what are some extracurricular activities that would optimize on my disposition but get me out of my typical fare and are more broadly appealing to both sexes? Don't mind adding more fellas to the Inner Circle of Bros as part of the process but I don't want to find myself stuck in another male dominated activity because I picked something out that immediately sounded fun to me and kept me in my comfort zone. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | What extracurricular activities have good gender balance ratios? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/14lqh8d/what_extracurricular_activities_have_good_gender/ |
fetchapailofwater | 2020-12-28 03:38:38 | 1,609,126,718 | null | ['bumble'] | 0 | klie8y | true | Tinder/Online Dating | 39 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/klie8y/dating_profiles_with_kid_pictures/ | 8 | My husband created a Bumble account and posted our kids in two of his five pictures. We have recently decided to divorce and had not told friends, family, or kids. I don’t care if he dates but I would have hoped he wouldn’t have done a public platform since our kids don’t even know yet. One of my friends messaged me ‘you should know what your husband is doing’ and I got so angry. When I confronted him he kept saying everyone posts pictures of their kids. Is this true? And if so, surely those people are divorced, right? We had JUST BARELY decided to even begin the process. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Dating profiles with kid pictures? | null | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/klie8y/dating_profiles_with_kid_pictures/ |
StorerPoet | 2022-04-17 04:11:14 | 1,650,168,674 | null | ['online dating', 'dating apps', 'bumble'] | 0 | u5f26s | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/u5f26s/am_i_doing_something_wrong_dating_apps/ | 2 | Lately I've been on a remarkable run of people seeming interested in me from dating apps and then canceling last minute and vanishing. In February it was someone from Bumble who canceled day of three different times, by the third cancellation I gave up. Last month, I attempted to schedule something multiple times with someone only for them to flake multiple times again. I went into this weekend with a date planned tonight and another planned tomorrow - but lo and behold, they both canceled on me today. 😂 My approach with online dating is typically to strike up a conversation shortly after the match, to talk for a day or two tops, then set up a date for later in the week. Once the date is set up, I typically don't message all that much except maybe a "hey are we still on for tomorrow?" My thought process is that a) I want to leave some good introductory conversation for the date itself and b) I don't want to get too attached or come off as too clingy or desperate by messaging someone every day between the initial match and the date -- when I literally haven't even met them yet. My question for y'all is, do you feel like that's a valid approach and I've just been super unlucky lately? Or would you do things differently and try to keep more constant communication leading up to the date? Thanks. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Am I doing something wrong? (Dating apps) | null | 0.76 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/u5f26s/am_i_doing_something_wrong_dating_apps/ |
Kyletw15 | 2019-01-23 06:08:59 | 1,548,223,739 | null | ['dating site'] | 0 | aiwpof | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/aiwpof/am_i_going_too_fast/ | 1 | So, I (25m) met this girl (21f) on a dating site not too long ago. I’m pretty sure we’ve only been talking for about a week, a week and half at this point. She is quite awesome. We know a lot about each other already. We talk pretty much every day all day. When I talk to her, I actually feel something. I can’t put my finger on what it is, but it’s awesome. You guys know what I’m talking about. And she says she feels the same way about me. However, the speed at which things are moving in this dating process is just...odd. We went on our first date the other day, have another lined up for this weekend. We’ve told each other some personal things and such, and we’re both pretty confident things will work out for us. I’m just wondering if it’s weird this process is going a mile a minute. I have zero complaints, and she doesn’t have any either. But just wondering what people think of this | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Am I going too fast? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/aiwpof/am_i_going_too_fast/ |
BluntyBoy512 | 2023-06-29 14:51:00 | 1,688,050,260 | 0 | ['matches', 'dating apps'] | 0 | 14m70bu | true | null | 399 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/14m70bu/im_26_year_old_guy_why_is_it_so_hard_to_get_dates/ | 138 | HI there I would love your guys opinions, I'm a 26 year old male I'm queens looking to date, meet women m. I've been on several dating apps with little to no success, with my work schedule it's hard to meet people. I get a few matches but no dates I don't know what im doing wrong. I could use some advice. Thanks for reading my post. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I'm 26 Year Old Guy Why Is It So Hard To Get Dates On Dating Apps | 138 | 0.85 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/14m70bu/im_26_year_old_guy_why_is_it_so_hard_to_get_dates/ |
Dylann_J | 2023-11-19 17:59:57 | 1,700,416,797 | 0 | ['hinge'] | 0 | 17z2tn5 | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/17z2tn5/how_to_maintain_conv_until_the_date/ | 1 | Hi (M27), my dating experience is really low, for the first time I got a match on Hinge (I sent her a rose (super like)), we already talked a little (without flirting,) and I will see her this Friday (we're going to grab a beer). as is Sunday night here I will ask what she does in her week-end, (the last time speack= Friday), but besides that, I don't know what I should be talking about to maintain the conv and so she doesn't cancelled the date, any advice | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | how to maintain conv until the date | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17z2tn5/how_to_maintain_conv_until_the_date/ |
stevebutabi1 | 2018-12-09 12:01:36 | 1,544,356,896 | null | ['online dating', 'dating apps'] | 0 | a4ki0l | true | Question | 51 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/a4ki0l/how_do_you_date_in_2018/ | 52 | As a 21y/o female in college, this shit is hard. I always wonder "I'm not ugly, but nobody approaches me." Most, if not all, of my generation still expects a man to approach a woman first. But that's such a disconnect from today's equality movement, and I agree. Why do I have to wait for a man to come up to me? Why can't I go up to him? A simple answer to that is I DON'T HAVE THE BALLS TO, which is might be how most men feel too. I haaaaaaaaate online dating. But have we all become so self-conscious that online dating is a safe way to avoid getting rejected face to face? I always hear people say "when I want a relationship, I don't use dating apps," but when the hell is that? So I wanted to ask you all, regardless of your orientation. How you feel about this men approaching first stigma? And how the hell you all "date" in 2018? Or should I just give up and download Seeking Arrangements? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How do you "date" in 2018? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/a4ki0l/how_do_you_date_in_2018/ |
ACA9991 | 2023-06-26 10:09:57 | 1,687,774,197 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 14jd8t8 | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/14jd8t8/issues_with_being_too_fast/ | 1 | Early 30s M - single for 6 months- after the break-up have been out with a couple of different girls, some through dating apps, some through friend's, some random. With all it started as casual, then few dates here and there, and later after couple of dates/months I got told that "it's obvious I'm looking for a serious relationship" and it's a big turn off for them that ends anything we did. On one side, don't want to rush into a relationship, hence being going out on different dates with different girls, see where things lead-have been focusing on my career, being very social, meeting new people, trying new things etc. On the other side, most of my friends are married & have kids, therefore huge pressure from family/friends/society bombarding me with questions when I'm getting married, having kids, settling down, what am I doing with my life etc \girls I've been with in the past couple of months range from early 20s to early 30s. Any tips/similar experience/ how to overcome dating in early 30s & find middle ground between not being pushy yet leading to something meaningful? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Issues with being too fast | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/14jd8t8/issues_with_being_too_fast/ |
electricsemen | 2023-10-19 11:29:27 | 1,697,714,967 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 17bgxrp | true | Question ❓ | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/17bgxrp/can_you_really_love_again/ | 1 | Kind of a deep question, I guess. But around six months ago I met the man I thought I was going to marry. Everything was perfect to me; same values, long-term goals, common interests, emotional and physical/sexual chemistry, he had all the logistical things like financial stability and a good career. I can honestly say I’ve never felt so much love for a man before, and the months I spent with him were more fulfilling emotionally than the entirety of my prior 5-year relationship, somehow. Unfortunately, he realised he wasn’t in love with me. He told me he loved me, but didn’t feel he was falling, and didn’t want to lead me on by continuing to see each other. I was devastated, but I loved him enough to let him go and find someone he could fall in love with. Since then, I’ve gone back to scouring the dating apps, meeting a few nice guys, most of which have been perfectly nice, conventionally handsome men with many of the attributes I wanted/had with the man I’d fallen for. However, I feel nothing. Sometimes I wonder if that’s a good thing, if the butterflies and the excitement aren’t necessary and it would be better to settle for something that didn’t feel magical. Then I wonder if I’m just a bit broken. With him, I’d thought of children, domesticity, leading a beautiful, loving life together. With everyone else, not only do I seem unable to envision a future, but I don’t necessarily feel excited for it; not in the same way. Everyone feels second to him, no matter how much time passes, as though he set the standard. So, do you feel love again? The magic? Is it worth settling for less than that? How long, if you have experience, did it take to fall again? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Can you really love again? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/17bgxrp/can_you_really_love_again/ |
Taraa28 | 2023-07-10 19:57:39 | 1,689,019,059 | 0 | ['dating app', 'hinge'] | 0 | 14w4g7n | false | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/14w4g7n/should_i_25f_end_things_with_him_30m/ | 1 | I met this man on Hinge in January last week. We were based out of same city but due to some circumstantial stuff we couldn’t meet till April. We were both very invested in talking stage. And were exclusive. My last relationship was abusive. He emotionally and physically abused me. This hinge natch was kind and considerate. We had so much fun talking about random things. He pampered me a lot. He was also deeply invested in my career and self growth. He was in a pretty high profile government job. He had a major stressor to face three months after us connecting. He started taking solace in alcohol. I was never comfortable with alcohol as a coping mechanism as I have spent quite some years dealing with my dads alcohol addiction. I still decided to stay by his side even though it was very stressful for me. Anyways, my world fell apart when he told me in May that his name is different on paper. He told me how he puts a different name on dating app because of his job. This makes sense. But honestly- he could have told about his true name after our first meeting. We had talked for 60+ days before meeting. He stayed at my place for 3-4 days without telling his name. His excuse is he was very anxious to tell about his true name as he was afraid of losing me. That he loved me so much. He also has no plans of quitting binge drinking and is having serious health ailments from it. He is undergoing some intense treatment in hospital. Idk what to think about the whole thing. Ik we gotta end things but I miss him so much. He did a lot for me even in just taking stage. I read our texts from good times every other night. I am having very bad migraines from one month. Had to take break from work and moved back to my parents house because of crippling pain. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Should I (25F) end things with him (30M)? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/14w4g7n/should_i_25f_end_things_with_him_30m/ |
missioncity8 | 2019-08-05 00:39:31 | 1,564,965,571 | null | ['dating app'] | 0 | cm3z6r | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/cm3z6r/taking_it_slow_and_relaxing_at_5_months/ | 1 | Hi r/dating, I am a 26m seeing a 33m exclusively for a little over 5 months now. We met online on a gay dating app, and while we were both open to relationships, we weren’t actively seeking one. Well, our first date was 12 hours, no sex and he ended up asking me out again. One date after another we started to develop more feelings for each other and he asked to be exclusive. We were texting everyday, seeing each other 2-4 times a week. Since time has passed, he told me he needed more space. He’s an attorney at a law firm while I work in a more relaxed tech environment. He told me he is an introvert and was spending the little downtime he did have with me and not recharging, his own hobbies, networking with colleagues, or time with his friends. It concerned me at first, but he’s told me he feels this is a positive for our relationship because we should both maintain separate lives and identities. I DO agree with that, I think it’s important for us to both have our own friends and lives. From what I’ve seen, whenever we do spend time apart then come together, the connection is even stronger. I struggle though. We’ve traveled to two cities via airplane, have another trip to Mexico and even Asia planned. He tells me he takes the relationship day-by-day and doesn’t have set expectations or milestones. Sometimes I feel like he cares less, but he’s also expressed that he struggles with being vulnerable and I know he’s experienced deep rejection from men. I wonder if he is too career focused to be in a relationship right now. How do I relax in the relationship? How does one know if the relationship is taking its course and we are growing used to dealing with the ‘boring’ aspects of life? Any one have similar experiences? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Taking it slow and relaxing at 5 months | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/cm3z6r/taking_it_slow_and_relaxing_at_5_months/ |
Aphrodite-Unicorn | 2024-06-04 03:14:20 | 1,717,470,860 | 0 | ['online dating'] | 0 | 1d7nakz | true | Question ❓ | 4 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/1d7nakz/online_how_many_dates_flaked_out/ | 1 | How many of you have experienced someone flaking out or bailing on you last minute with no warning or reason in online dating? Specially after making plans and confirming them the same day ( dinner, drinks, movies etc ) Is this usual on the online scene ? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Online - How many dates flaked out ? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1d7nakz/online_how_many_dates_flaked_out/ |
GAWDAMN69 | 2019-10-18 06:57:04 | 1,571,381,824 | null | ['facebook dating'] | 0 | djjqaj | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/djjqaj/im_confused/ | 1 | I(26) recently started talking to this girl(23) that I've known for a good while. We came across each other on Facebook dating and one thing led to another and I ended up texting her. Everything was good for a while but I started to notice she would be on social media posting things and leaving my messages on read or just not responding. This starts to get consistent but I just kind of brush things off and assume she's talking to other people or just not that interested. Two days ago I wake up and she just randomly calls me and we talked for about twenty minutes and everything seemed wonderful although a little awkward on my end cuz I wasn't expecting it. I got excited tho and just kind of sat all my doubts to the side. Until she started to ignore me again. Yesterday I send her a couple of texts that she kind of pushes off to the side and then she calls shortly after and we talked for probably three hours all together. She even said we should hang out and agreed to me coming over and possibly staying the night Sunday. After the long conversation about three hours later I text her just saying hey beautiful! And I get left on read. yet again she's on social media posting stuff. Hours pass so I get a little doubtful again and tell her I'm home if she wants to talk again cuz I'm kind of at a lost of how to keep her attention. Idk wtf is going on or what to do. I legit don't over text her. I don't send long text. I don't bug her every hour, minute or day and I'm honestly nothing but sweet to her and understanding. Can someone please give me some advice Because it's driving me mad. Lol | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I'm confused | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/djjqaj/im_confused/ |
No_Communication746 | 2024-06-10 15:19:01 | 1,718,032,741 | 0 | null | 0 | 1dco1ws | true | null | 43 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/1dco1ws/just_found_out_the_guy_i_have_been_seeing_since_a/ | 45 | I (26F) met a man (33M) here on a different sub reddit a year ago. I wasn't looking for anything but he kept pursuing me. I eventually gave in after 2 months and we were "officially together". This has been the worst decision of my life. I kept asking him to visit me (we stay continents apart) but he always had some excuses queued up. I always had my suspicions that meeting someone so good online is kinda fishy. He was so deceptive, layered his lies well that I started trusting him. The lies, the manipulation and his behaviour, all the dots connect now. Turns out he was already married and I am so emotional right now. I found out luckily by digging through his wife's sister's Instagram (which I could find by luck) which lead to a wedding event planning page. Lies to an extent that he lied that his wife as his "sister" and his own children as his "nieces" earlier. Upon confrontation, he dodged the question saying "I can't do this back and forth with you, I am busy". I feel extremely petrified at this whole ordeal. My trust issues are only getting worse after such an experience. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Just found out the guy I have been seeing since a year is already married | 44 | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1dco1ws/just_found_out_the_guy_i_have_been_seeing_since_a/ |
addisbad | 2021-01-12 05:14:06 | 1,610,428,446 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | kvl3nl | true | I Need Advice | 16 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/kvl3nl/how_do_i_have_the_what_are_you_looking_for_being/ | 2 | So the girl in question and I have been going on walks for about 3 months now, about once a week sometimes twice. We enjoy spending time with each other, or at least she doesn’t mind spending 3-4 hours whenever we meet. I’m not sure what she’s looking for though. We met on tinder and I wanted to get more clarity on what we’re doing and where we’re heading. I want to know if she wants to be just friends or if she wants more. How do I bring up this topic and what would be the best way to approach it? I’d hate to do it over text because she’s a horrible texter and there are times when she replies after a couple of days or doesn’t. Other times she replies immediately or in a few minutes. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How do I have the - what are you looking for? Being just friends or are you looking for something more conversation? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/kvl3nl/how_do_i_have_the_what_are_you_looking_for_being/ |
Guillaume573 | 2021-02-10 19:57:31 | 1,612,987,051 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | lh28wq | true | null | 10 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/lh28wq/girl_cancels_a_date_at_the_last_minute_but_still/ | 1 | Hi all, so this is mostly to vent and ask for second opinions ! So I’ve been talking to this girl for like 3 weeks now, we met through tinder. And last week I finally asked her out. And she said yes. We were supposed to see each other tomorrow afternoon. I was supposed to pick her up at her uni after her classes, and then we would go out to eat. But she texted this evening saying that she couldn’t go to uni tomorrow bc her car died (as luck would have it, I thought) So long story short, I said "too bad" and she said "I would have asked you to come near my place but it’s far for you". So I said that I wouldn’t mind, and she said ok. So now the question is, did she proposed to still see me out of politeness or do you think she’s genuine ? Thanks to anyone who’ll take time to read and reply ✌️ | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Girl cancels a date at the last minute but still wants to hang ? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/lh28wq/girl_cancels_a_date_at_the_last_minute_but_still/ |
ProtoBoss1 | 2015-09-06 21:05:14 | 1,441,573,514 | 0 | ['dating sites'] | 0 | 3jwakg | null | null | 6 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/3jwakg/i_26m_am_a_geek_dont_drink_or_party_where_do_i/ | 11 | My night of fun includes a LAN party and reading comics by candlelight. Most people my age met their current SO at bars and parties. That's not me. Where do I, a "geek" even meet someone? Where do introverted girls, girl geeks even hang out? I've tried dating sites but, man, is that a mixed bad. tl;dr - where do you meet likewise geeks to date? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I [26M] am a geek - don't drink or party - where do I meet someone? | 11 | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/3jwakg/i_26m_am_a_geek_dont_drink_or_party_where_do_i/ |
SomeGuy69-420 | 2023-10-21 17:56:37 | 1,697,910,997 | 0 | ['dating sites'] | 0 | 17d8c5r | true | Just Venting 😮💨 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/17d8c5r/communication/ | 1 | I’ve been single for about 2 years after my last relationship ended from being cheated on. I’ve been on dating sites for about a year and a half. I’ve gone on a few dates that ended with me being ghosted a day later. It seems like now I can’t even get people to respond to me much and if they do it’s for a few days and then I never hear from them again. Is communication just dead now? It seems like we all have access to people 24/7 with phones but communication has gotten worse. It seems like everyone says they’re lonely but don’t want to put in any effort to not be lonely. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Communication | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/17d8c5r/communication/ |
potatoOfTruth1 | 2024-08-02 08:03:47 | 1,722,585,827 | 0 | ['tinder'] | 0 | 1ei4hur | true | null | 55 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1ei4hur/is_this_age_gap_wrong/ | 1 | So I 18m have been on tinder for a bit. I’ve been talking to a woman who is 28 years old. We seem to have a good connection, is this wrong? I kinda feel odd about it tbh, my family doesn’t know about it and I don’t really want to tell them about it. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Is this age gap wrong? | 1 | 0.53 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1ei4hur/is_this_age_gap_wrong/ |
_Spen_ | 2020-11-24 22:16:20 | 1,606,256,180 | null | ['dating apps', 'tinder'] | 0 | k0f3nn | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/k0f3nn/whats_the_best_way_to_meet_people/ | 3 | I’m a 19 year old guy, somewhat socially awkward but am good at getting to know people once we get talking. The trouble is I struggle to meet people in the first place and I really don’t have a big social circle to meet people from. Most of my friends and family say dating apps like tinder etc should be avoided as most people on there are rarely looking for anything other than sex. On the other hand though I like to think I’m a confident person, I’m really not comfortable approaching random women in public and trying to strike up a conversation. I’m not good at starting, then continuing conversations, plus I’d likely be visibly uncomfortable in that situation. What’s the best way for someone like me to go about meeting a potential partner? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | What’s the best way to meet people? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/k0f3nn/whats_the_best_way_to_meet_people/ |
ajacobs1979 | 2019-08-20 19:43:31 | 1,566,330,211 | null | null | 0 | ct4upi | true | null | 47 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/ct4upi/response_times_to_messages/ | 4 | I've (40M) recently re-joined the OLD world after a few years, and I've noticed women taking MUCH longer to respond nowadays. If I get a response within 48 hours I'm ecstatic, whereas the majority take a week or just don't respond at all. The latter is okay as I have a thick skin and realize not EVERY match will become a conversation. People are allowed to realize they're just not interested before we chat. However, men are expected to initiate conversation and/or respond quickly, otherwise we risk the woman "losing interest". I hear this all the time. Isn't this an unfair double-standard? How can men feel like the woman is genuinely interested if they take their time responding to a message we actually put some thought into? EDIT: added my age and gender | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Response Times to Messages | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/ct4upi/response_times_to_messages/ |
Coldheartedflake | 2021-08-24 15:30:07 | 1,629,819,007 | null | ['swipe', 'OLD'] | 0 | papmfi | true | null | 223 | 0 | /r/datingoverforty/comments/papmfi/judging_a_partner_based_on_pets/ | 236 | It’s really disheartening to see profiles on OLD that say shit like “if you have a cat swipe left” or “dog lovers only.” I also had a conversation last night with a guy who once I told him I have a cat stated “I knew it, you seemed too good to be true” I asked him what he meant by that and he said that he’d never met cool cats and most women who have them are just like their pets. I found that to be an idiotic statement. I’ve had my cat for almost 17 years (bless her heart she is blind as a bat an sweet as pie) and judging me based on my sweet old cat seems like such a shallow and pathetic way to view someone. I’ve had bfs whose dogs have chewed up my shoes and I’ve never once judged other dog owners and said “well I’ve only met ill trained dogs so you must be just like them” it just doesn’t make sense. Don’t mind me, just venting your OLD frustrations Happy Tuesday | datingoverforty | t5_su6ij | Judging a partner based on pets | null | 0.95 | https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverforty/comments/papmfi/judging_a_partner_based_on_pets/ |
Spacefaring_Stranger | 2024-03-24 17:11:13 | 1,711,300,273 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 1bmpsxe | true | Support Needed 🫂 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/1bmpsxe/am_i_going_to_be_okay/ | 3 | I apologise in advance that this is really long and if this is all over the place or doesn't make sense. I'm a 21 year old guy with autism. I won't go into detail unless I need to, but I haven't had a great life and have never really had any emotional support. For most of my life I have felt that I don't need a girlfriend because I never felt the need for one (as in there was no feeling or desire). However, somewhat recently I have been hit by this crippling feeling of lonliness. I have been trying to weigh my options and come up with a solution to my problem. I don't think I ever will. Being autistic has come with its fair share of negative effects on my mental and emotional wellbeing. I've been on 4 dating apps for the last few months. I have never really expected much if anything from them so the result so far has been mostly unsuprising. I know dating apps are not really worth it but I feel like they're really my only hope. On top of that, I don't really leave my house, I can't drive, I can't keep a job, I have 2 friends and neither of them live close enough to me as to where I don't need a car to see them. Not having a job I think is a large contributor to my problem, because no job means no money, and no money is a problem. I know these things are supposed to be easily fixed by me but no one understands how difficult those things are for me to do. I do enjoy being outside though and I have no aversion to it. I will hopefully be getting some money soon, some of which will be going into a gym membership for a gym just down the road from me, and I do have outdoor hobbies/outdoor hobbies that I want to take up. I'm just lost. I don't even know where to start. I just need to be held and told that everything will be okay, someone I can cry into. Someone who understands that I'm particularly flawed and still cares about me. I feel like I need it so desperately but like I can't have it. It feels like because of my autism and life situation I don't deserve to be loved because there isn't really anything about me for anyone to even bother looking my way. I have no money, no job and no hobbies or interests that I share with anyone who would even consider dating me. I have been alone for my whole life, and I don't feel like that's ever going to change. I know it probably feels like I'm being too harsh on myself but this is the reality of it for me. I live with all of this every day. I feel do dejected and hopeless. I'm sorry for dragging this out and rambling a load on nonsense. If you don't understand anything, feel free to ask for clarification and I'll try to answer it to the best of my ability. I hope you have a nice day. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Am I going to be okay? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1bmpsxe/am_i_going_to_be_okay/ |
shadowx_1189 | 2023-11-12 12:19:56 | 1,699,791,596 | 0 | ['swipe', 'tinder'] | 0 | 17tj44n | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/17tj44n/giving_myself_a_panic_attack_with_tinder/ | 1 | Not sure if this is the most appropriate sub for this but I guess I’ll start with some background. Also, sorry for bad formatting, I’m on mobile. So the first thing to touch on is that the core of this is a Dungeons & Dragons campaign that is DM’d by my best friend. The group consists of myself, his wife, and a few other players. The other players all come from a tight-knit group whose family’s have been friends for decades. About 2 years ago, one of the guys in my D&D group invited his life long best friend over to watch a session because she was interested in possibly playing (context: he is gay and was not inviting her over for any alternative means, and I would never step on someone’s toes like that). I thought she was cute but I didn’t really invest much consideration in to it at the time, because I had just met her and theres a little bit of an age difference. I figured there’s no way she would be interested in a nerdy older guy she just met at a D&D game. She wound up joining our campaign and has been playing with us regularly ever since. I also found out that she had a boyfriend so I just kind of pushed the idea away all together. Fast forward a couple of months, to a little over a year ago, towards the end of the summer. Or D&D group has grown pretty close. We play bi-weekly but hang out pretty much every weekend. Myself, the DM and his wife are hanging out with one of the family friends on a non-game night. Through just the most random conversation, we realize this girl’s mom was good friends with my aunt growing up. So the family friend (an older woman) calls up the girl’s mom on speakerphone, asks if she knows who her daughter has been hanging around with, and name drops my last name. The girls mom immediately responds by yelling “will you please date my daughter?!” We all laugh and then she’s takes the mom off speaker and walks away to have a regular phone conversation. I quietly turn to my two friends and say something along the lines of “doesn’t (girl) have a boyfriend?”, my friend’s wife says “ohhhh no not anymore. I forgot you weren’t here last week (which was true, I was on a kayaking trip). Now, I had gathered the impression over these past few months that her now-ex-boyfriend was kind of a scummy guy and he didn’t really treat her well, but that they had been together for some time. Knowing all this, I decided not to do anything too forward. She had just gotten out of a shitty long-term relationship. So I made 0 moves nor did I ever say anything that indicated my interest. A month or so after that, we were all hanging out before getting a session underway, and she casually mentioned a new boyfriend that was a massive improvement compared to the last one. So I once again pushed the thought away. She found someone and was happy so there was no point in me doing air saying anything. She actually wound up bringing the new boyfriend to hang out a couple of times. We’ll call him J. He was indeed a good dude from what I could tell. Friendly and engaging, he even played with us in a side campaign that I ran for a short time while our DM came up with more content. Fast forward about a year to this summer. I never obtained specifics and she hasn’t talked about it at all, but she did say that she had broken up with the J. Now on to the current situation. For the past month or so, she and I have been a lot more talkative with each other. She would send me memes or TikTok’s, and we’d text back and forth about music or movies. Pretty normal conversations, nothing particularly flirty. Until about a week ago, when she became a little distant. Instead of texting me a few times a day, it’s down to every couple of days. I don’t want to come off as clingy or anything, I don’t want to lose a friend because I’m trying to push to be more than friends, and most importantly I don’t want to cause undue tension in our D&D group. So I stop initiating conversations with her and only text her back when she initiates. Then last night, things kind of culminated. We had a game session, and we all hung out for a while afterwards, but she was the first to leave. I’m still hanging out with the rest of the group, scrolling through Tinder while we watch TV. Her Tinder profile comes up on my app. I stopped scrolling and think for a few minutes about I this is actually the time to shoot my shot. I get nervous and decide against it and close the app, and leave to head home. Once I’m at home I’m loading up a game on my computer, so while it loads, out of habit I grab my phone, but instead of opening Reddit I reopen Tinder. The profile that comes up is for a 20 year old, much too young for me. So I swipe left, and my friend’s profile comes back up. I decide that I need an outside opinion on what to do so I text my DM’s wife (she is also one of my best friends) and ask if I can bother her for some female advice. im a ball of nerves at this point. In the two minute window before she answered I pulled Tinder back up with the intention of closing and re-opening the app to restart the queue, and the worst possible thing happened: I accidentally hit the like button. I don’t pay for Tinder so I couldn’t just back button it. I don’t know if she pays for it and will see that I liked her profile. Now my anxiety is through the roof and I feel like I may have ruined a friendship. I haven’t been able to fall asleep. I don’t know what to do. All I now is that we didn’t immediately match, so she’s not one of the handful that I have received likes from. Any advice? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Giving myself a panic attack with Tinder. | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17tj44n/giving_myself_a_panic_attack_with_tinder/ |
Deep_Humor3704 | 2021-09-12 07:05:49 | 1,631,430,349 | null | ['hinge'] | 0 | pmo04h | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/pmo04h/why_am_i_only_interested_in_men_who_play_hard_to/ | 1 | I don’t develop feelings for someone easily, but when I look back on all of the times I’ve had feelings it’s because a guy has played hard to get. By this I mean not agreeing to everything I say and keeping me guessing what he wants or if he likes me. Most dates I go on are from hinge, so guys are straightforward and its less fun. Why is this/any thoughts? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Why am I only interested in men who play hard to get? | null | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/pmo04h/why_am_i_only_interested_in_men_who_play_hard_to/ |
imthatspinch | 2024-01-03 03:27:16 | 1,704,252,436 | 0 | ['dating app', 'hinge'] | 0 | 18x969g | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/18x969g/should_i_like_a_guy_on_dating_app_that_rejected/ | 1 | So there’s this guy that I go to grad school with who I was introduced to by a mutual friend of ours. We met at a football game; I sat next to him, and were talking throughout. My friend told me he was pretty shy, but I thought he was cute so I started conversation. He was pretty friendly and chatty and we even laughed together at some points. Once the game was over he gave me a hug and said “nice meeting you see you around”. After we parted ways, a bit later I proceeded to add him on instagram and he accepted and added me back within minutes. The next week or so I kept seeing him around campus and he seemed excited to see me and said hi. We didn’t have opportunity to talk too much since we mostly just crossed paths in the hallways or out during lunch. I felt that he was friendly but didn’t know what he thought of me. After about 2 weeks of casually seeing him around, saying hello, and exchanging some small talk, I decide to just pull him aside and ask him out for coffee on the weekend. He responded with “I’m busy all weekend, but maybe some other time?”, and I took this as a rejection. It seemed a bit awkward the next few times I saw him but we still say hi when we see each other. I definitely think I scared him off by asking him out 2 weeks after we met, considering my friend told me he’s pretty shy. I also know that he’s somewhat religious, and we do share the same religion but I don’t think he is aware of that because he hasn’t gotten to know me enough. I didn’t even know if he was interested in dating at all, but I felt like I made a mistake asking him so soon. Now, almost 4 months later, I’m on Hinge and he pops up on my standouts. I was surprised to say the least. We seem to have a lot in common according to his profile. I’m now sitting here debating whether or not sending a like (well in this case it would be a rose since he’s in my standouts) would make me look desperate. I’m definitely not desperate for him but also don’t want to regret anything. I’m wondering if he sees that we are quite similar if he would have a different opinion now. I will also still be seeing him around campus as well if this doesn’t work out. Please help lol. TLDR: a guy i know and asked out for coffee irl said he was busy and maybe some other time. now I see his profile on hinge and want to know if it looks desperate to send him a like. we are quite similar based on his profile, and if he sees my profile maybe he will see more potential? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | should I like a guy on dating app that “rejected” me irl? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/18x969g/should_i_like_a_guy_on_dating_app_that_rejected/ |
boysbboys | 2024-03-25 17:27:01 | 1,711,387,621 | 0 | null | 0 | 1bnjele | true | null | 18 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/1bnjele/how_to_tell_if_person_youre_dating_is_transgender/ | 1 | because some are being stealty and not make it known on their profile. Yes,it is your right and you may identify as a certain gender, but not to tell or let it beknown is foul. How does one become cautious | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | how to tell if person youre dating is transgender? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1bnjele/how_to_tell_if_person_youre_dating_is_transgender/ |
cs342 | 2023-12-12 11:37:37 | 1,702,381,057 | 0 | null | 0 | 18gjyi8 | true | null | 23 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/18gjyi8/whats_the_best_reponse_when_a_girl_asks_how_many/ | 6 | I'm meeting a girl I matched with on Hinge for drinks this weekend. We ,matched a couple days ago and have great chemistry (at least when texting), and we're both really excited to meet each other for the first time in person. While planning our date, she playfully asked me how many other dates I was going on between today and this weekend. The truth is, I'm still swiping and talking to other girls just to keep my options open, but don't have any concrete dates planned with them as I really like this girl I'm going to be meeting. If I say I don't have any other dates, she might think I'm lying or that I'm unable to get other matches, which isn't a good look. But if I say I have a ton of other dates planned, it might put her off. What's the best way to respond in this case? | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | What's the best reponse when a girl asks how many other dates I have planned with other girls? | 6 | 0.87 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/18gjyi8/whats_the_best_reponse_when_a_girl_asks_how_many/ |
Majestic-Pickle2136 | 2024-08-06 23:06:19 | 1,722,985,579 | 0 | ['bumble'] | 0 | 1elw4is | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 9 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/1elw4is/is_it_difficult_to_emotionally_connect_with/ | 0 | Hi guys, Situation: I started talking through Bumble with a Chinese girl (the kind that seems to have an international mindset). We both live in Europe and she has been here for 4 years now. In general, everything is going well, we have already met once, we think alike in many things and there is a certain chemistry. Problem: my biggest problem is that it's hard for me to connect with her on a deep emotional level, like we talk about hobbies, family, and more. But there is not that connection that I could feel with someone from a more western culture. So I wanted to know if this is something about Chinese girls in general or just this one. Thank you very much! | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Is it difficult to emotionally connect with chinese girls? | 0 | 0.33 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1elw4is/is_it_difficult_to_emotionally_connect_with/ |
aravinth98 | 2023-09-03 09:40:48 | 1,693,734,048 | 0 | null | 0 | 168spix | true | null | 2 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/168spix/new_research_says_that_gender_imbalance_in_dating/ | 1 | https://www.businessofapps.com/data/tinder-statistics/::text=Tinder%20has%20a%20gender%20imbalance,is%20closer%20to%2050%2F50. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | New research says, that gender imbalance in dating apps in EU is closer to 50:50. Do you think it's true? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/168spix/new_research_says_that_gender_imbalance_in_dating/ |
Lit_Romney | 2018-10-03 09:19:43 | 1,538,558,383 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | 9kzk22 | true | null | 6 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/9kzk22/how_do_i_21m_get_out_there/ | 1 | I am looking for advice on how to get back into dating when I haven't been at it for a while. I haven't been around the dating scene much. The longest relationship that I have been in was about a month and a half but that was back in 11th grade. I had dated several girls here and there but never made any connection. My last date was more than a year ago. Since then I haven't put any effort or interest into dating because I am busy with University and work. I also get very anxious and intimidated when it comes to dating. I am currently studying abroad half way around the world and I haven't really considered going on dates here. My classes are starting to wind down now and I will have more interest in dating around before I leave. And I think when I get back home, that I will want to start trying a bit more seriously. What are your guys' tips for getting back into the dating scene? I have downloaded tinder more times than I can remember but I use it more as a way to pass time and to see if I could get lucky and make a real connection on there. But the dates that I have gotten out of it in the past have just made me frustrated. I am really oblivious to social cues, and I can't tell when a girl likes me or not. I come off as a nice guy who is trustworthy, but I am always afraid to make an actual move to show my interest. I am afraid of making them uncomfortable and coming off as creepy. Sorry for the rambling. Any help/advice you can give is much appreciated. Thanks everyone! | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How do I [21M] get out there? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/9kzk22/how_do_i_21m_get_out_there/ |
greasepunk1979 | 2021-11-28 22:29:49 | 1,638,138,589 | null | null | 0 | r4g87u | true | null | 10 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/r4g87u/isnt_it_funny_how_i_only_get_likes_on_bumble_when/ | 9 | I'm not what one would call classically handsome so I don't get flooded with likes but I had one a few weeks ago and I caved to the marketing pressure of it'll disappear if there's no action in 7 days (or whatever). So I paid for a week, looked at the profile of the woman well beyond my parameters and swiped left. So I spent the rest of the week Bumbling hard, swiping left and right for hours (probably minutes) on end. My premium membership expired yesterday. Today the little heart icon lights up again. I've got to believe that if I paid again that profile would also fall outside my parameters. WTF Bumble. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Isn't it funny how I only get likes on bumble when I'm not paying? A rant in one act. | null | 0.85 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/r4g87u/isnt_it_funny_how_i_only_get_likes_on_bumble_when/ |
Beautiful-Love7364 | 2023-09-28 08:13:12 | 1,695,888,792 | 0 | ['matched'] | 0 | 16ua3q2 | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/16ua3q2/i_dont_know_what_to_think_about_all_this/ | 1 | I was born in February 2004 and the guy I've been dating since June was born in September 2000 (meaning that we matched when he was 22 and I was 19). I honestly have felt amazing so far but now that he recently turned 23 and one of my friends asked me if I was comfortable dating someone his age, I’ve been thinking if it is weird for him to date someone my age? Should I be worried?. like he's the sweetest guy to me and all my friends, we have very similar life goals and go to the same college but idk if this should be a red flag or if I'm just letting it get to me and I'm overthinking it. Should I continue dating him? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | I don’t know what to think about all this | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/16ua3q2/i_dont_know_what_to_think_about_all_this/ |
TheMasterofDoom | 2023-10-15 18:10:13 | 1,697,393,413 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 178l8j6 | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/AskMen/comments/178l8j6/men_who_are_succesfull_at_the_dating_apps_how_do/ | 1 | Men who are succesfull at the dating apps, how do I best describe myself and how much should I fill out? I got the pictures bit down, but I always get kinda stuck on the best way to describe myself and who I am looking for. I also am unsure about how much of such profiles I should fill out, e.g. Qeustions, preferences, music tastes, linking socials and such. I do get the ocassional match, but I am looking to optimize my match output in order to hopefully get more dates and women that better match me. I should clarify that I am a straight guy, so I'm looking to attract women, preferably older but at the very least not younger than I (I am 30 years old atm). And I live in The Netherlands in case that matters (which I do doubt). | AskMen | t5_2s30g | Men who are succesfull at the dating apps, how do I get more succesfull myself? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/178l8j6/men_who_are_succesfull_at_the_dating_apps_how_do/ |
quickthrowaway108 | 2022-12-21 07:33:57 | 1,671,608,037 | null | ['dating app', 'feeld'] | 0 | zrdo8n | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/zrdo8n/how_to_ask_a_guy_how_tall_he_is/ | 0 | I (27F) have been using a dating app called Feeld. Many people don’t list their height on it. Tall people tend to, and sometimes you can get a rough sense of someone’s height from their photos, but sometimes not. I know this can be a bit of a sensitive topic on this sub. But I’m just not attracted to guys who are my height or shorter (I’m 5’6/7”). I tend to be most attracted to guys 5’10” and above. I rarely feel attracted to guys and am quite selective about the type I go for personality wise and sexual preference wise. So I usually spend a somewhat decent amount of time chatting online to get a sense of potential compatibility. But just wondering if there’s a non-offensive way to ask guys their height if they haven’t listed it on their profile? Bc the truth is it’s a waste of time for both of us meeting up if they’re not taller than me. I realise this can come across as shallow. But there’s been lots of times I’ve just not asked, or deliberately gone out with someone around my height, and it just does not work for me. It’s kind of a dealbreaker for me. Any advice? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How to ask a guy how tall he is? | null | 0.1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/zrdo8n/how_to_ask_a_guy_how_tall_he_is/ |
ForwhatitsWIRTH | 2021-11-19 21:56:00 | 1,637,358,960 | null | ['dating apps', 'hinge'] | 0 | qxqk5u | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/qxqk5u/trying_to_figure_out_how_i_can_meet_more_women_my/ | 2 | It’s been a couple years since my last girlfriend. We broke up because I thought we were heading in different directions. Long story short, a pandemic, and an extensive job hunt later I’m finally feeling like getting back out there. Problem is I don’t know where to look. I don’t want to meet someone at a bar. I’ve tried hinge and I’m convinced that dating apps are working against us. Although I did go on a couple dates. I much prefer to meet someone in person organically. I just don’t know where to go to find that. I would feel creepy hitting on women in the gym or at the store. I haven’t done much working out in the past 2 years so I’m not in my best shape but I’m someone who would much prefer having a hobby that helps me stay in shape and meet women as opposed to just working out. Any suggestions would help. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Trying to figure out how I can meet more women my age and not at bars. I, 29(M) have had success finding girlfriends in the past but recently it seems like they are all taken or getting married. | null | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/qxqk5u/trying_to_figure_out_how_i_can_meet_more_women_my/ |
Sweet_Investigator63 | 2024-01-15 03:06:14 | 1,705,287,974 | 0 | null | 0 | 196yae5 | true | null | 96 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/196yae5/guy_knows_my_apartment_address_and_asked_for_his/ | 30 | I made a stupid decision and let this guy pick me up for a first date ( i normally drive, but that night there was lots of snow and i was having car issues). we had already facetimed and he seemed really nice and i stupidly decided to give him my apt address (90% of the time I turn down offers to be picked up, but i had lapse of judgemnt bc of the snow and he seemed really cool) . I live in a large apt complex so there are probably 200-300 apts there and obv doesnt know my apt adress. after the date, i told him i didnt feel a connection, and he sent me a paragraph long text message insulting me and abt how i led him on and should pay him back $20 for the date. he sounded very upset and rude. i dont know what to do and i obv regret giving him my adress. what should i do? im going to be paranoid now whenever im walking around my apt 😭 | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | guy knows my apartment address and asked for his money back after I told him I didn’t feel a connection | 30 | 0.76 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/196yae5/guy_knows_my_apartment_address_and_asked_for_his/ |
--kendrick-- | 2022-09-01 19:27:47 | 1,662,060,467 | null | ['dating apps'] | 0 | x3g8u7 | true | null | 8 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/x3g8u7/what_does_going_for_a_drive_together_actually/ | 0 | I (19f) am talking to a (19m) guy who seems to be into cars and specifically said he likes going for drives. i hear people say all the time on dating apps that they’re up for going on drives together but what does that actually entail? i feel like it would just be really awkward sitting in a car especially when conversation runs dry. I want to ask if he wants to go for a drive but i’m worried it’ll be so awkward and ruin everything. I want to know the answer to the above question in general but does it also change depending on what type of relationship you are going to have? I think he wants fwb so would that be me inadvertently saying i want to have sex in a car if i asked to go for a drive? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | what does ‘going for a drive’ together actually entail? | null | 0.5 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/x3g8u7/what_does_going_for_a_drive_together_actually/ |
Ill_Raisin_5694 | 2024-03-07 16:32:43 | 1,709,829,163 | 0 | ['dating app'] | 0 | 1b8yxu6 | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1b8yxu6/is_it_weird_when_someone_ask_you_for_your/ | 1 | Hello. I’m just curious. It’s a dating app so you can see my pics and videos and kinda just guess what my nationality is which is what I tell guys to do all the time but then some men are very persistent on NOT guessing and they just want me to tell them. I know part of dating is asking questions and getting to know people but I find it strange when that’s the first thing a guy asks. Is that important for men? In my head I’m like what does my nationality have to do with dating? You should want to date me for my personality and not my nationality so idk it’s a bit offputting to me when it’s the first question right after we match on a dating app. What do you all think? Is it weird? Or am I just overthinking? (I tend to overthink everything anyway so forgive me lol) | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Is it weird when someone ask you for your nationality on a dating app? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1b8yxu6/is_it_weird_when_someone_ask_you_for_your/ |
spoiledcandy | 2023-07-28 11:10:18 | 1,690,542,618 | 0 | ['matched', 'tinder'] | 0 | 15bufkn | false | Support Needed 🫂 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/15bufkn/i_was_abused_raped_then_ghosted_by_somone_i/ | 1 | So it's a bit I'd an complex siatiatuon pla dong judge I just need support on how to get over him. So I was seeing somone else for about a month or so and alot happened he was abit absuive you could say? Well my family seems to think so and they think technically he assaulted me? As I told him I disnt want to have sex and espailly unprotected sex but he did pushed it while I was not sober. After that he made me deal with a possible pregnancy and miscarriage all by myself not even giving me a hug or allowing me to doke over during this time. He also barely texts me and ignores half my messages as we were just still just hanging out and not anything yet. After this I decided we are done and went on tinder to talk to other mature ppl idk what I was expecting a distraction I guesse. I was just talking to many ppl at once tondiatract myself. But one really stood out eventually I began talking to him eveeyday and our connection because intense we hadn't met yet but it was pretty romantic and both of said we never met or connected like this online before. I know it sounds silly maybe it wasnt real love but it was the begining stage it was more than flitting it was like we were in a realtionship we spoke about everything including trauma and suicide I really opened up and idk how bad his trauma was ju he shared ally of family issues he had. At that point its more than just flirting the bond we built maybe wasnt so serious but I'd say equivalent to dating somome for a month atleast. Anyway this was happening at the same time I was dealing with previous guy as I matched with this new one just a few days after ending things. I was espially assaulted and showing all sorts of signs of possible pregnancy and misscarraige and maybe STI's? Ofc I couldn't talk to the new guy about this I had nobody to talk to about it after the possible miscarriage I reached out to the old guy and said I need to talk to him about wjat is going on to figure out what to do and I need suport which was a mistake as he is abusive and gave very limited suport if any. He made me feel worse the next day I went to the doctor to test for STIs and I just went to a clinic where they just are understaffed I guesse and pushed me out after a few questions (I guesse they did technically do what had to be done...but I felt they disnt take their time with me) I had more questions but they sidnt have time and just lost it after all this abuse. I know now ita stupid bit I went to the new guy for emotional support I told him everything of how I had unprotected sex and I might have possible Sti I want to get tested before starting anything qne the doctor made me feel worse. I even gave him a chance to say I understand if he doesny like me anymore. He just unmatched and blocked and ghosted. He is usually so supportive I was shocked. I know that is alot or info I cant expect him to stick around but i thought at the least he would say I'm sorry about ur situation....I told him I got into an argument with my abuaive parents which lead me to go see that guy and not be sober and I was taken advantage of while not sober....so I thought he would atleast say I'm sorry for what you went through but I need to put me first or I dont feel comfotable I hope you feel better but I cant continue. He just ghosted when I was vulnerable and I know I know this alot to unload but I just thought atleast a simple " I'm sorry to hear that but I am not interested take care of yourself bye " he kept saying he wants to marry me lowkey and have his kids to which I said stop idk if I want marraige and he said I know i cant help how pwegwct you are I want to lock you down and make you mine forever. He also supported me emotionally when I was depressed. I know its alot to hear about stis but ghosting is so cowardly. By no means is he a bad guy but I think it shows he doesnt respect care or "love" me as much as I thought he did. Maybe he isnt all I thought he was in my head. He didnt know all the details but he knew I was with somone elses pretty recently which is one of the reasons I thought it was ok to tell him I wanted to get tested first? I thought we would just wait till I get tested? Again its alot of info for sure he isnt q bad guy but maybe not the one if he is gonna abandon me like that without even a I'm sorry I cant do this. Looking back out convos where not surfacey but the reason I feel for him is just because he treated me decent/respect well he did treat me well but I mean like he treated me like human which is something I'm not used to as I keep getting abused over and over again in my life. So maybe I'll find somone else who treats me decent too :/ idk I liked him I know its mostly my fault how do I get over him? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | I was abused raped then ghosted by somone I love...how do I move on | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/15bufkn/i_was_abused_raped_then_ghosted_by_somone_i/ |
icounternonsense | 2022-07-06 00:47:25 | 1,657,068,445 | null | ['OLD'] | 0 | vsd11s | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/vsd11s/am_i_doing_the_right_thing_what_could_this_mean/ | 1 | So, a bit of background to explain what's going on. I (33/m) met a girl (29/f) through OLD about a couple weeks ago. Since then, we've seen each other fairly often, maybe every three days or so. She's a fairly shy and quiet girl, but seems to enjoy my company a lot. We talk a ton in person and over text, but I give her space, too. She even deleted her OLD profile right after we met. I feel like she trusts me. We were pretty open about each other's wants and desires from the start, saying we'd be receptive to something casual or long term (I leaned more toward long term). We have really good chemistry, too. We went on our first hangout/date a couple weeks ago. A few days later, we had date 2, checking out a lot of the downtown shops. Before we parted, we hugged, a lot. She told me how much he enjoyed it and how it "felt so right". For date 3, we spent time at her place talking and doing fun activities. We cuddled for a bit, and I made it a point to say that I wouldn't do anything she wasn't comfortable with. After a few minutes, she grabbed my hand and wanted me to touch her. A couple more minutes after that, she took me her room and we had a lot of sex for the rest of the night. We continued texting and hanging out through last week, very frequently. She'd tell me about her work, how she was doing, etc. We'd make jokes over text, all that. There hadn't been any indication that I'm doing anything to upset or concern her at all, given how often we text and see each other. Then on Friday, when I attempted to hug her, she said she wasn't feeling it. I told her I understood and didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. We talked and talked until it got late, then I headed home. She asked me to visit again on Saturday. I did, and we watched a movie. When I attempted to cuddle her, she said "I'm not really into that, sorry", with what seemed like a very sad look on her face, like she visibly felt bad. I told her I didn't wanted to worry, that I just value being with her and spending time with her. I just wanted her happy. Since Saturday night, the frequency of her texts started to dwindle rapidly. She's texted me twice since then. I started to worry that something was wrong, but also thought there was the possibility she was just busy. Thinking I did something wrong, I told her that I wanted to respect her needs and her space. She was very kind and thanked me, telling me how much she appreciated it. She then said "I'm not exactly in the right head space at the moment and I think I need to be alone for a while". I told her that I want her to take all the time she needs, and that I'll be there for her when she's ready. What do you think this could mean? My head's in an emotional funk, and I know I can't think clearly at the moment. I'm needing someone's outside perspective to help me recenter myself, and offer some advice. Ultimately, I just want her to be happy. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Am I doing the right thing? What could this mean? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/vsd11s/am_i_doing_the_right_thing_what_could_this_mean/ |
throwaway_8748 | 2021-01-25 03:14:28 | 1,611,544,468 | null | ['dating app'] | 0 | l4enrv | true | I Need Advice | 6 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/l4enrv/good_questions_to_ask_your_date/ | 2 | [28M] Currently talking to a girl [26F] who I met on a dating app. We talk everyday via text and will have a 3 hr phone call once a week. It’s great and we get along very well. However she’s MUCH more outgoing and socially energetic than me. So she pointed out that sometimes on the phone she’ll let there be silence so I can ask her a question but somehow she ends up asking and that she doesn’t always want to be the one to bring up topics as it feels she wants to get to know me more than I do. I’ve never been good at this even with friends even though I am quite a social person. What are some strategies I can use to get better at this in the long run? Sure I can ask what are some good questions but I feel best questions to get to know someone are the ones catered to your audience. So a “how to think of it” strategy would be better. Open to any opinions though. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Good questions to ask your date? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/l4enrv/good_questions_to_ask_your_date/ |
Commercial-Calendar2 | 2021-09-20 10:29:46 | 1,632,133,786 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | prs2fr | true | Tinder/Online Dating | 78 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/prs2fr/milfing_through_tinder_to_loose_virginity/ | 27 | Milfing is a practice where young guys pick up older women for sex. I am a college student and a virgin. My friend suggested i use Tinder for Milfing. Is it unethical and an asshole move for me to find middle age women (some of whom are single moms) for sex ? Im not talking about fooling women into sex. I am talking about certain middle aged women who mostly are divorcees who want to get laid with young lads like me. So Am I The Asshole for hooking up with these single women ? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Milfing through Tinder to loose Virginity ? | null | 0.66 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/prs2fr/milfing_through_tinder_to_loose_virginity/ |
ThicAndSporty | 2020-12-10 06:59:11 | 1,607,583,551 | null | null | 0 | kaanq7 | true | null | 0 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/kaanq7/the_strangest_date/ | 0 | null | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | The Strangest Date | null | 0.4 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/kaanq7/the_strangest_date/ |
caro0o | 2018-12-07 06:28:54 | 1,544,164,134 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | a3xalh | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/a3xalh/tinder_hookup/ | 2 | If a guy on tinder asks me to come to his apartment on the first date, does he just want to hook up? I outright asked him what his intentions were, and he said “Lol I mean it’s spontaneous and having company is never a bad thing lol I thought it would be fun to get to know each other and watch a movie lol” Besides this being like a dangerous potential kidnapping scenario, is this just an invitation for sex? Edit: follow up- how do I tell him I want to meet in public without making him feel like he’s sketchy? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Tinder hookup? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/a3xalh/tinder_hookup/ |
utente007 | 2020-01-12 20:12:29 | 1,578,859,949 | null | ['dating apps', 'okcupid'] | 0 | enso0d | true | null | 2 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/enso0d/never_dated_anyone/ | 5 | So, I’m 30M, never dated. Can I have some tips? I don’t know what to say. I’m not the classic guy that girls or women want to date here where I’m from. When I was a boy they liked to go dancing, drink alcohol, they care for the look, expensive clothes, famous brands, they talked in the Dialect. I was spending time at home drawing, writing, playing Nintendo, watching movies and series. No one was interested in me, the one I liked they already had boyfriends, and to be honest it wasn’t a big deal to me, I had other things to think about it. At university there were a lot of girls I was interested in, and with some maybe I could do something, but I was too much of a friend and didn’t know how to exit from friend zone, in case I ruined the friendship and quit the friendship as well. Very few were interested in me but I didn’t like them so I did nothing with them. After that I moved then came back, and I was going through a depression phase for many reasons and didn’t want to do anything for dating. I started working, I used OKCupid to date, there was no one in my town. Long distance relationship are complicated and many people didn’t want it. Then depression again. I moved to another country, I used few dating apps but no one again. And now I’m back to my hometown, bit depressed, in a few months I will move again and start a new life, so what should I do? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Never dated anyone | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/enso0d/never_dated_anyone/ |
[deleted] | 2012-12-15 18:13:49 | 1,355,595,229 | 0 | ['online dating'] | 0 | 14wi1c | null | null | 26 | null | /r/AskMen/comments/14wi1c/compliments_about_appearance_alternative_title/ | 19 | Hey Menions! I've been meeting a number of men recently-- I just moved to a new city and have been actively going out and trying to meet new people as well as meeting them through online dating-- and have spent some one-on-one time with a few of them. The hangouts fall somewhere in the grey area between making new friends and going on dates. These men all have very different personality types, careers and interests but there's one thing that has consistently happened with all of them. They have ALL complimented me on either my smile, my eyes or both following our hangout, e.g. "You have a really charming smile". These compliments haven't been followed up with specific invitations to hang out again but there has been continued friendly contact (sporadic texting or emailing) with all of them. In my mind, complimenting someone about their smile or their eyes is a non-sexual comment and does not indicate that I find the person in question attractive. If I were to find someone attractive, I'd comment on their whole person ("You're gorgeous") versus a highly specific attribute. So, I offer you two questions for discussion: 1. Are the compliments you give a woman shaped by your intentions toward her? If so, how do your intentions inform the type of compliment you'd offer? 2. By complimenting my smile and my eyes, are these guys trying to be nice about not finding 'the whole package' attractive? | AskMen | t5_2s30g | Compliments about appearance (Alternative title: are these guys just trying to be charitable?) | 19 | null | http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/14wi1c/compliments_about_appearance_alternative_title/ |
OhYouKnow1111 | 2023-04-17 02:49:08 | 1,681,699,748 | 0 | ['OLD', 'dating apps'] | 0 | 12oz57e | true | null | 2 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/12oz57e/how_should_i_25m_think_about_dating_and_standards/ | 0 | I'm a 25 year old guy currently living in a major city on the West Coast, and have been having a lot of issues lately with attracting women. By many standards, I'm a relatively successful person. Well-educated, well-traveled, make $300k+, volunteer, etc. In saying that, I have no issue with admitting that I'm not conventionally attractive - I'm 5'8, with a weak chin and asymmetrical eyes. On the whole I'm still confident in my appearance, and I do what I can to maximize my physical attractiveness in other ways - I'm in great shape, keep well groomed, have been told I have nice style, and all that other good stuff. I attended school on the East Coast and had moderate success with dating. It felt easy to find organic connections where attraction grew naturally over time, and I had healthy relationships there. Since graduating and moving West, I've faced challenges. I've tried to meet people organically through volunteering/hobbies but have mainly encountered people in relationships already - I'm passionate about what I'm currently involved in so don't have a ton of room to find alternatives here. Dating apps and bars/clubs have been pretty difficult for me - especially as I feel like physical attractiveness is pretty key in those realms. On OLD, I do get some 'likes' - but primarily from people who are very out of shape or may already have kids. Those people definitely deserve love But I'm not ready to be a parent, and I would really like to be with someone who could match my lifestyle. In a way, I feel like as a 'package' it wouldn't be wrong of me to uphold certain standards for my dating life, but I'm unsure if my lack of success betrays that notion. Should I sacrifice my 'standards' to try and find someone? Should I try and find ways to better deal with loneliness? Are there other approaches I'm not considering? Would appreciate thoughts or advice | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How should I [25M] think about dating and 'standards' as someone who is successful but not conventionally attractive? | 0 | 0.5 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/12oz57e/how_should_i_25m_think_about_dating_and_standards/ |
[deleted] | 2021-08-15 20:15:22 | 1,629,058,522 | null | ['dating apps', 'tinder'] | 0 | p50v0r | true | null | 48 | 0 | /r/datingoverthirty/comments/p50v0r/hooking_up_on_dating_apps_feeling_regret_im_a_35/ | 0 | Going through a break up so I decided to try tinder and get the full on experience. Matching, messaging, then agreeing to meet up for the sole purpose of hooking up. So I did that just last night. 1. Guy (39M) looked cuter in pictures and online video chat. I was disappointed with how short he was and really how he was dressed. I guess he’s like a ‘rocker metal guy’ but he was wearing really baggy clothes. It just wasn’t a good look. I was thinking about bailing but he did send some nudes and the body wasn’t bad at all. But i stayed because I was determined to accomplish the full on tinder experience. 2. So anyway, conversation wasn’t bad. He was a bit of a geek. Talked about video games a lot and a certain movie franchise. How he even goes as far as reading all the books and literature. I mean, I’m a bit of a nerd too but he takes it to a whole other level. It was sorta hard to keep up. He kept trying to hold my hand and insist I lay my head on his shoulder. 4. We watched a movie. I took that opportunity to show him I was horny and was totally willing to hook up by making out and rubbing his crotch. 3. When it was time to do sex. Body was hot. I don’t know why he wears such baggy clothes. He has a great body. His penis was enormous and he was flaccid. He started going down on me which he was really good at. He did that for a very long time. Then it was time to be penetrated and he couldn’t get hard, he managed to get a semi in but nothing. He asked for oral to help which I tried on him but nothing. 4. After we said our goodbyes, I don’t know why I felt horrible about myself. I feel like I used someone that was genuinely nice to me. I am way out of his league in terms of looks and career. Honestly, we got a lot of stairs and glances. And he pointed them out, he said “people are giving me mad shade” today. But I can’t help it believe they were thinking how’s he with her. I mean, it’s been done. I did it. But I don’t think I’ll ever do something like this again. I’m extremely depressed now and experiencing full on anxiety attacks. Any advice on coping? | datingoverthirty | t5_34cyw | Hooking up on dating apps. Feeling regret (I’m a 35 female) | null | 0.36 | https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/p50v0r/hooking_up_on_dating_apps_feeling_regret_im_a_35/ |
ModdedMaul | 2021-10-16 20:21:13 | 1,634,415,673 | null | ['online dating', 'dating apps'] | 0 | q9js4l | true | null | 6 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/q9js4l/how_to_get_a_real_relationship_with_a_girl_and/ | 1 | I (21m) just want a serious real relationship where we cuddle and go on cute dates. I've been on dozens on online dates that never go anywhere and the most I'll end up getting is a mediocre one night stand with a girl I'll never talk to again. I've kissed 7 different girls but never got passed a 4th date, and while that sounds nice in theory, it's actually not fun at all. I just feel so used and drained I hate the basic small talk over food and it's clear she thinks that all I want is sex just like every other guy on online dating apps. I just want to meet a girl who I can bond with and won't see me as that perv who's trying to get laid | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How to get a real relationship with a girl and not just a ONS? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/q9js4l/how_to_get_a_real_relationship_with_a_girl_and/ |
Flaky_Acanthisitta_5 | 2024-03-18 02:00:04 | 1,710,727,204 | 0 | ['dating app'] | 0 | 1bhff6v | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1bhff6v/advice/ | 1 | I went out a guy a few days ago. We go to the same college. We met on a dating app. He had the idea for us to go to a bookstore since I told him I liked to read. It was a pretty causal chill date. We mostly sat and talked about interests and then looked at some books. He mentioned to me that he appreciated that I asked him to hang out as he is shy (I’m shy as well). He also told me he’s not necessarily looking for anything long term but open to it. After we parted ways in the parking lot he told me to let him know if I wanted to hang out again. Im not sure how to explain this but it almost felt like he meant it in a friend like way? I could be thinking too much in to it but I’m not sure. I gave him my number afterwards and he texted me telling me he had a nice time with me. But that was all. Should I reach out and see where things go? TLDR: Should I reach out to a guy who I feel like in my eyes after our date views me more of as a friend? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Advice? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bhff6v/advice/ |
Life_Care_2373 | 2023-05-27 19:51:52 | 1,685,217,112 | 0 | ['swipe', 'dating app'] | 0 | 13tghyk | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/13tghyk/i_18f_want_to_swipe_right_on_my_best_friends_18f/ | 1 | Hello everyone, I'm not used to post on here but I'm really lost rn. So a bit of back story + sorry for my English. A while ago, i downloaded a dating app and got some dates. This lead to a big portion of my friends to also download the app, including one of closest friend : V. There she met her ex : S. I disliked S from the beginning due to some of his beliefs and actions against my friend. However, V is the type to fall in love very rarely and she fell HARD for S. After a few weeks, i became okay with S bc he was treating my friend really nice and managed to get her to stop substances (yay ). I really shouldn't have tho because after 2/3 months of dating, he ghosted her. He blocked her from everywhere and didn't answer to any of her texts. She obviously was very very depressed due to this (she's already depressed and has an eating disorder..) but she was still hoping he would text her. I genuinely thought this was the end and she was just hurt broken but no Last week, after 2 MONTHS he un block her. She has to text first but they talked a lot and finally agree to end the relationship "officially". She came to my house hours after the exchange super depressed and we talked for a while about it. She only told me and one of her other friend but we are not close and she isn't responding to my texts AT ALL. I, again, thought that was the end, especially since S explained that he wasn't able to understand that somebody could rly liked him and that he was in dark place blablabla, he wasn't ready for a relationship. But no, this afternoon, i received a notification from the app telling me that "S has swap right on me !" (You can see some profil that swap right on you and can choose from here to accept or decline their profile)... This guy went on and on on how he loved her but wasn't ready for a relationship but got back on the app the following day...? Now that's where idk what to do. Should I let V know ? Even though this could lead her to hate herself and feel even more depressed ? Should I keep it a secret ? Even though it's directly linked to her and would let her understand all of what has happened ? Or...should I swap right on S and give him a piece of my mind, threatening to inform V of what's happening ? I'm really lost rn so any suggestions would be gladly received... EDIT : I do not like this guy at ALL wtf guys I don't want to swipe right on him to have sx or smth. I hate this guy with my whole heart. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I (18F) want to swipe right on my best friend's (18F) ex | 1 | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/13tghyk/i_18f_want_to_swipe_right_on_my_best_friends_18f/ |
Wuttelut | 2017-12-06 06:59:46 | 1,512,543,586 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | 7hwe1c | false | null | 2 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/7hwe1c/went_on_a_date_with_a_girl_it_went_well_now_we/ | 1 | Okay, so a little bit of background first. Me, I'm a 24 year old guy, she's a 22 year old girl, has one daughter who's 2 years old. I've known the girl for probably 5 or 6 weeks. We met on Tinder, and I've made previous posts about her, before we met, if you want to check them out. Both of our accounts on Tinder were mostly for jokes, and out of boredom. Neither of us were looking for a one time thing, which we talked about before meeting, we did however sleep in the same bed, and our "date", if you could call it that, lasted from a Saturday, to a Monday morning, where I left. Anyway. She was EXTREMELY eager to meet me. 2 or 3 days after we met on Tinder, she kept talking about how we should meet soon, and how she can't wait, she even said she thought I was maybe her soulmate. 10 days after meeting on Tinder, we met up, she was so eager, that she invited me to stay all of Saturday, all of Sunday, until Monday morning. She lives about 20 minutes by train from me, so it's easy to meet up. We met, we clicked, we talked. We had fun. Both days it went smooth, no problem talking, it seemed like we had chemistry. I could tell she had fun, she smiled a lot, laughed a lot. Asked into a lot of things, and so did I. We cuddled, I gave her a lot of head-massages/hair massages, I don't know what you call them, fed her some chocolate once, while she layed on my lab with her head, it was fun and cute. She even called me sweet, cute and nice on numerous occasions. Anyway, fastforward until Monday, it's morning. She drops off her daughter, who got home Sunday evening, at around 7pm, and immediately put to bed, she was at her dads house. Anyway, she goes to work, I go home. I forget my shirt, and something else, not intentionally. I tell her that I'll be coming again, which she seemed happy about, she has a really cute genuine smile. Side note: This was my first ever "date" with a girl. Anyway. I get home, she said her period was starting right before I left that Monday morning, turns out it wasn't her period afterall, she hasn't had one in 2 months, so she might be pregnant again, but it wasn't visible at all, so she doesn't know. Either way, it doesn't matter to me. We started chatting less from the DAY I left, like. We barely talked that Monday, and the rest of the week, and the coming weeks, until now. Sometimes it's days between our chats. I just don't understand why, I mean. I can understand she's not interested, but we had so much fun, and I could tell she genuinely had fun, I did too, and before we met, we talked A LOT on chat. Problem is, I like her. I think I've fallen a bit for her, and it sucks. I really hate it, I really didn't wanna fall for her, because I was afraid something like this would happen, but that's not the main topic of this post. I've asked if she felt unwell, and she had for a bit, but that was the same week as when I left, so like 3 or 4 weeks ago. I really wanna see her again. And I've tried to give hints that I do want to. Like, for example: I told her that I was looking for my shirt the other day, which I was, but forgot that she still had it, and let her know she could just have it as an early Christmas present, and she insisted I have it back - does this mean she wants to see me again? Because I really don't think so. I'm getting really strong vibes that she doesn't like me, nor want to see me again. For example, she never writes first, when we do chat, it's for a short period of time, and she's not the fastest at replying, given she has a daughter to take care of, that's understandable, and a life outside of me, but before we met, she replied fast, so yeah. So. What do I do? Should I try and write like "So, do you wanna go on a date?" which I know, she doesn't want to, or what do I do. Should I just straight up ask if she's not interested in seeing me again? I did kinda do that recently by writing something along the lines of "Heyy, I know what we should watch if we meet again, I just started watching this series, and it's great, given that you are intersted in seeing me afterall" she didn't address the fact that I said "Given that you are interested in seeing me afterall" at all, only asked what series it was. So. That's it, please, if there's something you're unsure of, please ask, so you can give the optimal advice. Thank you for reading all of this. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Went on a date with a girl, it went well. Now we barely talk. Help? (Long) | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/7hwe1c/went_on_a_date_with_a_girl_it_went_well_now_we/ |
melodramasupercut | 2018-09-16 18:02:53 | 1,537,120,973 | null | ['swipe', 'swiped', 'dating app', 'tinder', 'bumble'] | 0 | 9gcnfh | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/9gcnfh/how_to_handle_dating_app_situation_with_guy_23m/ | 3 | Forewarning that this post might make me sound slightly creepy, but I am a paranoid and non-confrontational person so it’s not too out of character. Earlier today I was hanging out with the guy I’m seeing and at one point I could see in the reflection of his glasses that he had opened up Bumble and swiped through for a few seconds. He (obviously, at least from my pov) did this a little while later too when we were walking and he tried to hide his phone from my view. I didn’t call him out on it because I’m super non-confrontational and don’t know how to have that conversation. Also, although we’ve been seeing each other for 4 months, we have not discussed exclusivity, so there’s nothing I could really call him out on I guess?? Anyways after he left I re-downloaded tinder and bumble and immediately found him. My question is, would it be passive aggressive to swipe right and see if he says anything about it? Or should I be mature and just bring it up in person? tl;dr guy I’m seeing used dating app in front of me, what is the best way for me to react? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How to handle dating app situation with guy (23m) I’m seeing (20f) | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/9gcnfh/how_to_handle_dating_app_situation_with_guy_23m/ |
[deleted] | 2015-05-03 19:31:34 | 1,430,681,494 | 0 | ['online dating'] | 0 | 34qu45 | null | null | 129 | null | /r/AskWomen/comments/34qu45/whats_wrong_with_online_dating/ | 20 | ...aside from what my username implies, obviously. | AskWomen | t5_2rxrw | What's wrong with online dating? | 20 | null | http://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/34qu45/whats_wrong_with_online_dating/ |
explorer1960 | 2023-12-15 15:41:11 | 1,702,654,871 | 0 | ['OLD', 'bumble'] | 0 | 18j2xb8 | false | null | 22 | 0 | /r/datingoverfifty/comments/18j2xb8/old_and_meeting_organically_arent_actually/ | 37 | Her: Well, funny meeting you on Bumble Me: I know you? Her: We were on the group bike ride. I was wearing ____ Me: Oh yes, of course We had chatted briefly, there were several people I was talking to - friends, friends of friends, and one lady I did exchange numbers with (not bumble lady) so never really talked much to bumble lady, let alone exchange numbers with her. We have exchanged numbers now though. Lesson - if you're on OLD, doing real world stuff still helps. If you're doing real world stuff, being on OLD just might help you avoid missing an opportunity | datingoverfifty | t5_12ieog | OLD and "meeting organically" aren't actually separate. | 37 | 0.93 | https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/18j2xb8/old_and_meeting_organically_arent_actually/ |
OzentheUnfazed | 2019-12-09 01:59:54 | 1,575,856,794 | null | ['matches', 'matched', 'swiping', 'online dating', 'tinder'] | 0 | e837p3 | true | null | 11 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/e837p3/my_tinder_experience_a_desperate_cry_for_help19f/ | 2 | Started seriously swiping on tinder 3 months ago, I honestly can’t believe how long it’s been makes me sad that I’m still unable to find someone to be with, and I have accumulated 100 or so matches. In the early stages, I would get messaged pretty frequently by the guys who I matched with but inevitably I’d be ghosted or I would lose interest. Now when I get a match I’m lucky to even get messaged first. Tried messaging first with a recent match but no response. The whole online dating experience for me has been a slow decline downhill for my mental state and personal life. I kinda wish I never seriously got into tinder because I find myself caring and overthinking about stuff that didn’t use to matter to me. Like how many Snapchat friends I have or who can I snap with next so my score can go up. Before I was just content with binge watching shows and getting good grades. At this point I can barely focus on watching anything or studying because I’m thinking about Snapchat scores and matches on tinder. I don’t blame these apps directly because i know I’m responsible for my own shit and I just need to delete tinder and come back when my life is more stable but then I think about what I might miss out on or who’ll see that my profile has been locked. Those are the main things preventing me from deleting the app despite desperately needing to. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | My Tinder Experience: a desperate cry for help(19F) | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/e837p3/my_tinder_experience_a_desperate_cry_for_help19f/ |
Effective-Bar9092 | 2024-08-14 09:31:25 | 1,723,627,885 | 0 | ['hinge'] | 0 | 1erx94m | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 25 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/1erx94m/exclusive_but_he_updated_his_hinge_profile/ | 1 | Me and a guy are explicitly exclusive. Before we were exclusive but after we had met, I noticed that he changed the order of his images on his Hinge profile, but I was definitely alright with it since we didn't explicitly establish exclusivity at that point. We have since explicitly agreed that we are exclusively seeing each other and things have seemed great since. The day we decided to be exclusive, I went on the app to pause. This weekend, by habit I wanted to take a look at his profile and it was the same. Today, I went on the app because I wanted to see a photo of him that I liked that was on there and I noticed that although all of his prompts were unchanged, he had changed the order of his photos. It's not like this is the first time I've seen him rearranging his photos so I'm currently trying to give him the benefit of the doubt that he does this by habit? The same way I sometimes go on his profile just to look at his photos that aren't all available on other platforms. I definitely want to bring this up with him, I'm just unsure about how strong I want to come on to him. Can anyone let me know what you think? Does he necessarily have intentions to see other people or does anyone out there ever rearrange their photos on their profile for other reasons e.g. you're really particular about how your public profile seems to others? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Exclusive but he updated his Hinge profile | 1 | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1erx94m/exclusive_but_he_updated_his_hinge_profile/ |
andorinha_nostalgica | 2024-08-23 14:58:35 | 1,724,425,115 | 0 | ['dating app'] | 0 | 1ezewbl | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1ezewbl/a_bit_confused/ | 1 | If there are any. To sum it up, I F(28) met a guy M(26) on a dating app. Initially we met at the same distance from one another for a cup of coffee. Afterwards he came up to my city for a couple of drinks and we ended up sleeping togheter. Then I went to his city. By the time I left he told me "hit me up when you want to meet up" sort of felt like we wasnt supposed to talk besides meeting so I never initiated contact but he does. I sort of feel like hes waiting for me to say well lets meet this friday at my house but I feel as though this is low effort from his side. Since we have met a couple of times already and slept togheter I feel as though he should have the behaviour of asking if im doing something over the weekend and I feel like that would be more direct and show interest. Since that argument i stopped talking and only respond when he sends a text. Am i doing something wrong here or not understanding something? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | A bit confused | 1 | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1ezewbl/a_bit_confused/ |
pearlofwine | 2023-04-07 18:15:32 | 1,680,891,332 | 0 | ['matched', 'tinder'] | 0 | 12eu5k1 | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 3 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/12eu5k1/how_should_i_approach_old_contact/ | 1 | I met a girl a year ago and we exchanged snapchats, we talked a bit with voice notes and she seemed cool we had a nice vibe, I matched with her on tinder not long after and sent an arguably cringy opener. Not sure if that matters but we stopped talking. I've been having a dry spell and wondered if it's worth shooting my shot and texting her to see if she's up for something. If I do, then I'm not sure what I'd say, a casual voice message or a text ? Either way it's been a year and I'm not sure if its just weird to reach out.. What do you guys think? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How should I approach old contact? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/12eu5k1/how_should_i_approach_old_contact/ |
Werewolf1810 | 2023-12-07 03:24:31 | 1,701,919,471 | 0 | null | 0 | 18cm8u2 | true | null | 1 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/18cm8u2/how_has_no_one_implemented_this_yet_on_a_dating/ | 1 | We all see the same rants about "guys just swipe on everyone" "he or she matched me and then never messaged/replied" "I (woman) have no time, too many matches/it's overwhelming/etc", it's all a feedback loop. We're all sinking further and further down; it's a race to the bottom to see who can show the least amount of effort. But there's a potential solution! Why haven't any of the major dating apps implemented a feature where if you continuously match with someone and literally never message/reply, your profile gets hidden/kicked/de-prioritized/flagged etc? Why haven't any of them limited total conversations to X? Why haven't they made it so you can only send as many messages as you respond to, etc etc etc? So many seemingly easy ways to dissuade toxic behavior, encourage participation and effort, and help reduce/eliminate some of these issues that make it such a slog for everyone | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | How has no one implemented this yet on a dating app? | 1 | 0.33 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/18cm8u2/how_has_no_one_implemented_this_yet_on_a_dating/ |
LoveScoutCEO | 2024-01-14 18:49:23 | 1,705,258,163 | 0 | null | 0 | 196mzh4 | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/196mzh4/want_to_improve_your_chances_of_success_on_a/ | 1 | I have always wanted to write that headline. Well, the article claims that leaving a voice message blows up your chance of success. As some of you probably know I am know fan of dating apps, because I spent over a decade in the industry. But this is the sort of thing that should help because it personalizes you. That is so important. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Want to improve your chances of success on a dating app by 48%? This article claims there is one little trick! | 1 | 0.3 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/196mzh4/want_to_improve_your_chances_of_success_on_a/ |
Boring-Outcome822 | 2022-10-05 17:43:02 | 1,664,991,782 | null | ['matched', 'bumble'] | 0 | xwh5rs | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/xwh5rs/is_there_something_wrong_with_my_message/ | 1 | I matched with a woman (let's call her Monica) on Bumble, and she just sent a "Hey :)". I looked through her profile, there wasn't much on her bio but she did list painting and creativity as interests. She had a few travel pictures and a picture of her holding some paintings. So I responded with "Hi Monica :) Those are nice paintings, I assume you made them?" It's been a day that I haven't received a response but she hasn't unmatched yet. Could be that she's just not interested for another reason, but I'm just wondering if there's anything wrong with what I wrote? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Is there something wrong with my message? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/xwh5rs/is_there_something_wrong_with_my_message/ |
[deleted] | 2015-03-16 04:02:59 | 1,426,478,579 | 0 | ['online dating'] | 0 | 2z75sj | null | null | 3 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/2z75sj/not_sure_how_to_approach_the_subject_of_seeing/ | 1 | I have been on 4 dates (1 overnight) with a former coworker since the middle of feb. Last night he was telling a story that included a girl he was seeing in January and he goes "oh I'm not seeing her anymore by the way". When we left eachother this morning he goes "talk to you soon" Anyway I think things have been going really well but I checked his online dating profile and it said he was online today. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Not sure how to approach the subject of seeing anyone else | 1 | null | http://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/2z75sj/not_sure_how_to_approach_the_subject_of_seeing/ |
rainydaywoman11 | 2019-12-29 12:39:00 | 1,577,623,140 | null | ['dating apps'] | 0 | eh5hyy | true | null | 12 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/eh5hyy/what_is_dating_like_for_people_in_their_late_30s/ | 10 | I recently got out of a 10+ year relationship and I feel like it will be very hard to find single men in the same age range as me. Everyone seems to already be married. Dating apps seem like they’re more for younger people. Am I wrong in saying that? Any insight or advice? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | What is dating like for people in their late 30’s? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/eh5hyy/what_is_dating_like_for_people_in_their_late_30s/ |
throwaway32932428 | 2023-02-07 13:25:50 | 1,675,776,350 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | 10w1rjy | true | null | 4 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/10w1rjy/im_infatuated_and_dont_know_what_to_do_next_about/ | 1 | I've met this girl on tinder and we talked for a week, we clicked, I liked her and she liked me.. that's at least what she said to me.. She invited me to visit her to her place and it was amazing. I was there 3 days and I loved every single moment of it, I tried to hold myself away from falling for her since I thought I wasn't ready for relationship but it happened. We did cuddle, have sex, we went to places, enjoyed each others company and I felt alive once again in years. I'm gonna remember these days for the rest of my life for sure. And now since I had to go home since she was busy and had to go to to another city I miss her so much. I fell for her so easily even though I tried not to, she such an amazing person, she plays like 5 different instruments, she knows how to sing, she is a gamer, she is an astrophysicist, she's nerdy, she has amazing tattoos on her body. She loves same music like I do. She likes art.... I mean I could just go on and on. I feel unworthy of her and I feel lonely now and sad and I'm not even sure if she wants to even pursue anything further with me. Do I tell her how I feel? What should I do next. I want her so bad and to hangout with her and be with her. :( | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I'm infatuated and dont know what to do next about her | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/10w1rjy/im_infatuated_and_dont_know_what_to_do_next_about/ |
Huntersmamaaa | 2019-06-30 03:30:13 | 1,561,865,413 | null | ['matched', 'swiping', 'bumble'] | 0 | c78i9q | true | null | 2 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/c78i9q/unsure_about_this_guyi_feel_hes_an_ass/ | 0 | Okay so here's the story I currently live 2 hours away from home just graduated in May. I'm moving back home and matched with a dude at school on bumble...turns out dude was in town for a baseball game. And actually lives like 20 mins away from me back home. So he's been coming up here just to see me. I move back end of July, and and the last 2 times he was up here I peeked when he was driving on bumble and I saw his location was active....meaning he had been actively swiping on bumble while coming up here to see me......am I crazy or is this messed up? I haven't invited him back up since the last time like 2 weeks ago. But we text/snap daily...also our texts having been sucking lately. Idk if he's into it and I don't really just wanna waste my time. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Unsure about this guy....I feel he's an ass | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/c78i9q/unsure_about_this_guyi_feel_hes_an_ass/ |
Embarrassed_Shame784 | 2023-08-28 08:05:23 | 1,693,209,923 | 0 | ['online dating', 'dating apps', 'tinder'] | 0 | 163fytq | true | I Need Advice 😩 | 1 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/163fytq/how_to_approach_girls_im_hitting_31yr_this_year/ | 1 | I'm still single and never been into any relationship also this Online dating apps are not working for me I'm praying to lord everyday to get me a good life partner but God isn't answering me right now I tried tinder, bumblebee..etc... Even tried to search over any dating events, social events, volunteering programs, many times When I see couples on road or in a park I feel happy and sad at same time, asking myself a question why don't I've a partner? what curse is this? Will I die being single? Nowadays school kids are having girlfriend why not me? In school days I didn't even know what is love or value of a relationship, in college days I was very busy in volunteering programs and volunteering in cancer hospital. Now I don't know how to approach girls, yes I'm already turning 31 this year. Sometimes it's heart wrenching to listen from your relatives asking questions like boy when are you getting married? or going out for a date? I don't know what to answer I just silently walk away from there. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How to approach girls? I'm hitting 31yr this year! | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/163fytq/how_to_approach_girls_im_hitting_31yr_this_year/ |
trent_97 | 2021-11-07 01:14:17 | 1,636,247,657 | null | ['matches', 'online dating'] | 0 | qodx7b | true | Question | 3 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/qodx7b/matches_to_date_ratio/ | 1 | What’s your average match to date ratio? I’m well over 300 matches with 0 dates. I’m about to give up on online dating but in this world it’s almost the only chance to find someone. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Matches to date ratio | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/qodx7b/matches_to_date_ratio/ |
bubbleteaherbaljelly | 2021-01-09 14:20:00 | 1,610,202,000 | null | null | 0 | ktrpii | true | null | 21 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/ktrpii/what_is_wrong_with_people/ | 8 | 1. I’m on Bumble and I matched with a guy since Christmas who seems cute. I hit him up and we exchanged pretty good messages. I mean he did really replied and the conversation went so well sharing opinions about many things as well as hobbies. We agreed to meet in person but I went for a trip on New Year so we moved it to this weekend which means today. However yesterday we only exchanged one message which I felt quite strange and he didn’t say anything about the date until I dropped a text to confirm 3 hours before the time we planned to meet. At that time he still said okay. And yeah everything is assured and I just kept getting ready for it. Until one hour before the date I opened the app again and bam he said something came up and he can make it... it was so unbelievable. He appeared to be nicer than this. 2. Matched with another guy in another app. I actually matched with him a few months before in OkCupid. At that time he was looking for hookup only but I wanted more than meaningless sex so we stopped there. This time he came up with a compliment on my profile. I said I remembered I matched with him before but he didn’t recognize me. It’s okay anyway. He also said he was impressed by the way I hold the conversation which is better than most of his matches (poor guy. Probably matched with a lot of lame girls) So he’s still looking for hookup, but somehow miss the companionship too. Then he asked for my Facebook and Instagram. I told him that I don’t post many things on social media so if he’s looking for something like booty pics like millions of girls doing now for attention then my social media can’t provide that. He said he just wanted to see more photos and talk to me easier. I gave my Facebook and Instagram and just exactly like what I thought, he looked at them and left me on read. I know this guy is just wanting to fuck around cause the last message was “I got a better look than how you look so I was not really interested in you”. Thanks to these guys that make more and more people in online dating losing their confidence and feel insecure. 3. My job doesn’t give me many chances to meet people so I use dating apps. One guy just came up to me and sent me this text “you’re using dating apps so much. I guess you’re lone and don’t have many friends in real life” I was like wtf?! I nicely told him about my job situation and I don’t like when someone just assumed things about me but they barely know me. He said he understand and just wanted to chat for fun and he’s writing a book about that. But after that he kept talking about why people use dating apps a lot and asked me if it because of being lonely or sex addiction or both in my case. I didn’t want to answer and didn’t want to explain either especially when that’s a stranger from out of nowhere. He said something more about that but I didn’t care enough to remember but man I’m on two apps doesn’t mean I don’t have any other connections in my life. Seriously what’s wrong with people? Thank you for anyone who read all of my post. I may get various ideas later and I appreciate all. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | What is wrong with people? | null | 0.8 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/ktrpii/what_is_wrong_with_people/ |
dwydner | 2020-10-05 22:51:34 | 1,601,938,294 | null | ['dating app'] | 0 | j5trmc | true | Question | 2 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/j5trmc/persistence_can_manifest_the_impossible_or_can_it/ | 1 | Hello All, I'd like to know your thoughts on persistence, because an unusual thing happened in my life that has piqued my interest. So, I don't believe in holding out hope for someone who doesn't like you. I feel like it's a waste of time, and in most cases, just creepy. So when my friend told me that he was going to keep pursuing a girl who'd friend-zoned him, I bluntly disapproved. However, he explained that he'd openly told her that he was willing to be her friend and spend time together as just friends, but that he would ultimately be trying to change her mind. And she agreed to this. Fast forward six months, and she tells me and her friends that she loves him and that they're getting married. xD WHAT!? \cue the Jeff Goldblum "you crazy SOB you did it" meme. Now, something important to point out here is that (despite how great they are) both my friend and his now fiancée hadn't gotten many dates for the several years that I've known them. So, although I believe they're sincere about how they feel, I'm convinced that their shared circumstance helped bring them together. However, now I'm curious to know what others think of persistence in pursuing someone. This girl told him right out of the gate that she wasn't interested, and now she wants to have his kids. What can account for that? In a world where we could all be easily replaced with the next beautiful face on a dating app without ever knowing, has persistence become a precious trait? Or, did she simply come to believe that he isn't a creep, and that he's the best she's going to do? | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Persistence can Manifest the Impossible! - Or, Can It? | null | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/j5trmc/persistence_can_manifest_the_impossible_or_can_it/ |
textornahthrowaway | 2017-01-27 22:55:45 | 1,485,557,745 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | 5qkbt8 | null | null | 44 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/5qkbt8/tell_me_about_your_tinder_experience/ | 6 | 23/M I've had a couple short relationships and one long relationship. I haven't dated at all in the last year and half (since the long one), and I've been focusing on myself. Now I want to start dating again. I've never used Tinder, but I feel like it's a decent way to meet new women and go on casual dates. Is this correct? Do a lot of people still use it? I'd like to hear what your experience with Tinder has been - guys and girls - and give advice for someone starting out (profile tips, what to expect, etc.). Thanks :) | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Tell me about your Tinder experience | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/5qkbt8/tell_me_about_your_tinder_experience/ |
offmychestbumble | 2018-12-16 01:17:56 | 1,544,923,076 | null | ['matched', 'bumble'] | 0 | a6kvi2 | true | Venting | 19 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/a6kvi2/how_i_was_used_on_a_bumble_date/ | 26 | I'm mostly dumbfounded a person would even act this way. I met a girl on Bumble a few weeks ago and I stupidly asked her out. On our first date everything was going great (I thought). But there was a topic that came up that I thought nothing of but will make sense later. She mentions to me that she had an interview at my place of work (which is one of the best employers in my state) and asked me about marijuana use/drug tests before I got my job. After the date she texts me first and I moronically ask her out again assuming there was genuine interest. She said yes and mentions getting the job offer in the following texts over the next day. Then she cancels the day of claiming to be "sick". She asks to reschedule, so I actually believed her. I even directly asked if she was interested in meeting up again, and she said she was. She cancels again the day of after rescheduling. Today I come to find out she matched with me because my place of employment was on my Bumble account and she used the date as a way to figure out if she should be worried about a drug test for the job. She literally used me to get the scoop on drug tests at my company. I stupidly paid for both of our drinks and she took advantage by ordering a second one on my card while I stuck with my only one. At least she smoked me out in her car at the end of the date (but now I wonder if she did that just so she could verify weed use while working at my job). What I thought was just being strung along by a rude girl turned out to being used on a date for one of the pettiest reasons imaginable. I mean the former hurt bad enough. I'm taking my employer off my account. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | How I was used on a Bumble date | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/a6kvi2/how_i_was_used_on_a_bumble_date/ |
TheBrinkofOverthink | 2024-01-13 07:35:34 | 1,705,131,334 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 195in3z | true | Support Needed 🫂 | 3 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/195in3z/feeling_a_little_overwhelmed/ | 2 | Hi all, I’m just hoping to get a little bit of a morale boost or advice. I, 23 F, have been on multiple dating apps and have been putting myself out there (in the real world too) to find a boyfriend and eventual husband. I just feel like there aren’t many guys out there who are looking for a life partner or guys that meet the parameters I’m looking for. I’m seeking a genuine and kind guy with similar values and a similar vision for the future (married, kids, stability, etc.).— Imagine a wholesome and pretty traditional relationship and you’ll probably have a good sense of what I’m looking for. (A “white picket fence” future, if you will). Every date I’ve been on has ended under some sort of unfortunate circumstance. One guy called me a “fat ass” repeatedly (I am 5’5” and 125 lbs. He stated early on he was interested in tall, skinny women and I guess I didn’t fit the bill). Another wanted to be punched in the face (which is not something I’m willing to do). Yet another guy thought it was appropriate to wear a hat for every date that we went on (4 total) to hide his hair loss (which I suspected he had and didn’t care about, but I DID care that he wanted to hide it from me for so long). Etc., etc. For context, I’ve been actively searching for a life partner for about a year now. I’m starting to get to the point where I’m worried there’s not a guy out there for me. What should I make allowances for? Am I being too picky? Some friends of mine want me to “cast a wider net” and talk to a wider variety of guys. Other friends say my “pickiness” (only talking to guys that seem to be seeking the same thing as me) is warranted and necessary. I’m also fairly inexperienced with dating/romantic relationships. I’ve only had one boyfriend before while I was in high school. It wasn’t a very healthy relationship, unfortunately. Overall, that relationship and other factors have left me feeling pretty nervous about starting a new relationship, but at the same time I know I’m ready to start a new relationship- I have so much love to give and I’m just trying to find the right person. I know it’s only been a year, I’m just also starting to feel a little worn down by the search. What do you all think? Thank you in advance for your thoughts <3. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Feeling a little overwhelmed. | 2 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/195in3z/feeling_a_little_overwhelmed/ |
cawcaw89 | 2023-02-26 22:34:34 | 1,677,450,874 | null | ['online dating', 'tinder', 'hinge'] | 0 | 11cuyro | true | null | 5 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/11cuyro/meeting_people_online_vs_in_person/ | 2 | Here’s the situation: I’m a straight dude with good luck with online dating (tinder,hinge hookups/meetups that went well) but no luck even talking to anyone at the bar/club. Just wanted to see what people’s experience has been. From the dudes I have talked to many seem to have the opposite issue. Thanks! | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Meeting people online vs in person | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/11cuyro/meeting_people_online_vs_in_person/ |
vicncak | 2017-06-03 15:37:54 | 1,496,504,274 | null | ['online dating'] | 0 | 6f1sm3 | null | null | 9 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/6f1sm3/why_do_girls_hate_me_so_much/ | 1 | I have had girls openly comment about my monotone voice, i have had girls openly call me ugly, i have even had girls laugh at me just for saying "hi" to them. All this has done is erode my self esteem away and reinforce the feeling that i will be alone and single for life. Every time i even look at a girl, they just give a disgusted look back. It doesnt help much that i am basically socially disabled and have no charismatic aspects. Ive even felt like killing myself over this, i dont want to spend life alone. I see no point in life if you cant share happiness and love with someone else. And to make matters worse, i have absolutely no luck in online dating, no responses, absolutely none | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Why do girls hate me so much? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6f1sm3/why_do_girls_hate_me_so_much/ |
DesperateCounter5413 | 2024-07-31 18:17:35 | 1,722,449,855 | 0 | ['matched', 'online dating'] | 0 | 1egu9en | true | null | 6 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1egu9en/i_m28_met_her_f30_online_after_5_months_i_was/ | 2 | Keywords: Online dating, mental abuse, narcissism, mental illness, personality disorder, ghosting If that‘s not the right subreddit, please help me to find the right one. English is not my first language. It will be a long story, I'm thankfull for everyone who reads till the end. I'm desperate for advise and helpfull thoughts from outside my head since my own mental health starts to suffer recently because of all of this. ________________ TL;DR VERSION: OP met a woman on an anonymous platform who had previously been with a narcissist. She suddenly didn't feel ready to meet up after all. He decided to wait. She appreciated that. They chatted for 5 months. Meetings were (almost) always canceled by the woman for various reasons. Every time OP was about to break off contact, the woman gave him enough reason not to. Nevertheless, they never met. In the end, there was a strange phone call in which the woman behaved very strangely and mockingly. Although she promised OP that she liked him very much and really wanted to meet up, she hung up in the middle of the call and ghosted him. From one moment to the next, there was no more contact. OP is overwhelmed by the situation and is now wondering which of the 5 months was real and which was all a lie. ________________ I am not the kind of guy to date online. But since I moved to an other town I downloaded this app to chat with strangers nearby. I had a nice conversation with this women, we will just call her Amy. We moved from a public thread to dms after a few days and the topics started to get more private, deep and intimate really quick. We both noticed, that we had a lot in common. Actually terrifying how much. Sometimes I was thinking that I'm chatting with myself. Anyways. I liked her personality a lot and the description and the few pictures of her and her body matched my preferences. Easy to say that I never met a girl before, that seemed so perfect for me. After a few weeks I asked for her number. But she told me that she's a little bit unsecure and wants to wait until the end of March. Then she will give me her number and we can meet up. Amy was in a abusive relationship with a man before, so I had no problem taking it slowly. My screentime on my phone went from 3 hours a day to 8-9 hours a day. We were chatting every day, as much as possible. I felt like a 16 year old boy falling slowly in love for the first time again. We were talking about everyday stuff, typical topics you discuss in the beginning, music, films, food, school, work and of course about our sexual life and a little bit about our previous partners and many more things. In the end of march, when I prepared to get her number so we could finally meet in public, she had to drive to her aunt, because her aunt has cancer and felt very bad at that time. I really felt sorry for her and of course the meeting and getting her number took a back seat. After 2 days of almost no messages from her she suddenly told me that she is not ready to meet someone and her past abusive relationship left deep scars, that didn't heal yet. Of course I felt bad and I was a little bit angry. I did not expect that message. But she seemed like a women you do not meet a second time in your life. We talked a lot about her and her previous relationship. She was with a narcissistic before that usually abused her mentally but also abused her physically (hard face slaps and pulling and squeezing her arm, so she often had bruises, she told me). I really underestimated that and decided to stay and wait for her to be ready for new dates and a new relationship. But I had one condition, she has to start therapy again. Surprisingly she said yes and went to the same place where she went right after her last relationship (It ended like late 2022 or early 2023). We slowed down the plans to meet up or to give me her number, but since we still chatted on an anonymous app I needed some other things in exchange to not feel miserable. She was very hesitant to show me any new things at first. She couldn't show me selfies of her face, of her body. The pictures she was sending me were old ones. She couldn't send me memos, she was not feeling comfortable with phone calls. I read a few things about victims of narcissistics and tried to put myself in Amys shoes. She also told me that I'm her type and that she thinks that I'm really beautiful, that was making her nervous. Well okay. I accepted that (even if I would rate me only a 6/10 on an average day), but always tried to give her the feeling that she was also beautifull (she really is on her pictures). I didn't want to push her to anything but I still had the feeling that she was not even trying. I just felt like she was happy with the good feeling that I gave her. And here is the contradictory part: We also started sexting and exchanging pictures at one point where she told me that our fantasies perfectly match and we both liked what we saw. She also said, that she usually does not send spicy pictures even in relationships but she feels safe and confident sending those things to me. She didn't start at 100% but she slowly made progress sending those kind of things when she still couldn't send me any other things. On the one side I was happy about that, on the other side I was sad. We had our first disputes and at one point I was thinking to break of contact, because it again didn't feel like she was even trying and I felt my mental health suffer from the anonymity. I knew she was doint therapy so I thought "you just can't see what she is doing to make it work". And suddenly she was sending me some selfies of her face. Unexpected and just enough for me to be happy for the moment and stay. This has happened several times in the last 5 months. I'm feeling bad, I'm thinking about breaking off contact, then out of nowhere she gives me her Snapchat to change platforms (Mid April). I'm feeling bad, I'm thinking about breaking off contact, then out of nowhere she asks for a phone call and we hear each other live and in person for the first time (Mid June). The last case, two weeks ago, I'm feeling bad, bang, she suggests giving me her number every day, number by number. (Only the last one she couldn't give me until today. She says there's a mental blockage and she doesn't know why she can't send me the last number.) Always unexpected and just enough to stay. Late April/Early May we tried to meet for the first time again since end of march. She just started therapy and after her first session she said yes to my proposed date idea. Just meeting in the town, grabbing some coffee to go and walk thourgh the park. After 2 weeks, 1 day before the date she told me, that she again can't. She was diagnosed with PTSD from her abusive narcissistic ex partner just two days ago and feels miserable, she can't leave her appartment. We have to postpone the meeting. Of course I understand that. We postponed and tried again. And god how we postponed and tried.... 3rd try: she had a panic attack, poor girl, sure I understand 4th try: she is sick, caught a flu 5th try: couldn't sleep all night, felt miserable 6th try: some sick stomatch vomiting thing 7th/8th try: ear infection 9th try: she had her period before, 3 mentally pretty bad days and a sort of small panic attack, that prevented her from leaving the appartment. There were more things that made us postpone dates, but I didn't count as a "try". Her other aunt died, her uncle had heart surgery, her father went to hospital, meantal breakdowns....5 months later we still didn't meet. 99% of our conversations were really beautiful, funny or hot. We got on really well and our humor matched almost perfectly. But I noticed that the few times we argued, she absolutely couldn't handle it. Her reaction was mostly to avoid conflict. No more writing. Not expressing her wishes and feelings. Not opening up. That actually improved a lot over time. I've read that this is a common reaction of victims of narcissists. Basically, we have always treated each other fairly and well. I understood her illness, her feelings and her fears. She understood that I sometimes got a bit angry and impatient. There were several times when we were on the verge of breaking up contact, but thanks to my efforts, things worked well between us again and we kept in touch. However, I must confess that I have been a little suspicious since the beginning, as I am very careful on the Internet, except for this time. I've often had the impression that I might just be there to keep her busy. A sexually exciting internet adventure, or just a man who makes Amy feel good (she has said several times that she feels much better since she met me). But I always pushed these thoughts aside. Would she really text me every day, until 3 or 4 in the morning on the weekends? During the 5 months, there were a lot of things that seemed strange to me, but which I stupidly ignored. Her understanding of me almost felt like she was telling me what I wanted to hear. Most of the time she only said something back about her feelings. I like her? She likes me. I like her a lot? She likes me a lot. I think I've fallen in love? She thinks she has fallen in love. Towards the end, that also changed and she's told me more often in the last few weeks that she really likes me. I was also surprised that she could be on her cell phone so often and for so long. She very rarely went to bed before me. And if I was awake until 4 to write, then she was too. If I went to bed, then she did too. She only sent me pictures of herself and selfies (towards the end this happened more often) on request, but never wanted to see any of mine. But when she got some when I asked, she was very happy about it. But she never asked of her own accord. She also never asked for a date but always seemed happy when I do and told me how much she want to meet in person. Even if we never met. With one exception, she only wanted to have sexting or phone sex when I asked her to, but she seemed to really enjoy it when it happened. She never asked on her own initiative. When it did happen, it felt good and we continued to have good conversations afterwards. Which I also found very strange: She always fantasized about what she would do if she was with me now or I was with her. Cuddling, kissing, sexual things. But it never seemed to be enough to meet up. It got to the point where I was quite annoyed by all this talking in the end. The last month: Something changed for me at the beginning of July. I came back from a very stressful family vacation, which affected me emotionally and is still very much on my mind today. After being very reserved for a few days, which didn't seem to bother her, I told her how I was feeling, that I didn't have much energy to write, told her about other unpleasant symptoms and told her that I couldn't meet up at the moment. It was the first time I had canceled. She seemed very worried and upset and said she cried a lot because she was so worried. She told me that it wouldn't change anything for her, that she wouldn't let me down and that she still really liked me.We continued to have daily contact, although no longer in such a loving way. But we still had nice conversations. She wished me a good morning every day and I wished her a good night every evening. We both continued to tell each other that we had firm intentions to meet up. The last 2 weeks: now she wasn't feeling well. She got her period (only the second time in 5 months) and felt bad and was in a lot of pain. She had an emotional low for several days and felt really bad and cried a lot. When asked why, she said she had no idea. When asked what she was thinking about, she said “maybe that it would be easier with us if I was mentally healthy and that it would be easier if half my family weren't ill”. This of course affected our date plans and we didn't meet up. This time it hurt me a lot because I was convinced it would work out. We kept our distance and wrote less. I was also still reeling from my family problems and had no mental strenh. However, we kept in touch. She continued to reassure me that she really wanted to meet up, but just didn't know what to do and was overwhelmed by the situation. Last evening. The last phone call. The reason why I decided to post here: We both went to bed in a bad mood the day before yesterday. The reason was that I didn't feel valued and ended the conversation with a curt “good night”. We didn't write during the day. In the evening, I asked her for a phone call so we could talk about the weekend and the previous evening. She said she had gone for a walk with a friend and would call me when she got back. We spoke on the phone around 10pm. She told me that she had a stomach ache and didn't want to cry on the phone and actually wanted to avoid the subject. She also asked to speak normally on the phone at the beginning. Here I made the mistake of perhaps keeping the “normal” conversation too short. In general, however, the whole conversation seemed strange, different than usual. I had the feeling that I wasn't talking to the person I had been talking to for the last 6 weeks. Although it was about serious topics, she was silly and not serious. Her words didn't match how she sounded and acted. Her undertone was funny. As if she wasn't alone and another person was listening. You could hear her amusement. At one point she asked me if I had just heard her cat (?), which I denied. Call me crazy, but I suspect a second person in the room was too loud. When I tried to turn the conversation in a serious direction, she also made fun of me saying “Ohoh, you're getting serious now. But don't shout at me”, with a ridiculous undertone. Then, when I said that she was very wound up today, she just said amusedly “Oh yes, do you think so?” and hung up. I've often read about people being ghosted in the middle of a chat conversation. But I was ghosted in the middle of a phone call. After 5 months of chatting every day. From early morning until late night. I was still thinking about a mishap for 1-2 hours. But then I finally understood that I had been ghosted. The first thing I did was to delete all my pictures from the Snapchat chat immediately. Today I also received confirmation of the ghosting. She has also deleted her pictures from the chat. And this was at a time when she was supposed to be at her therapy session, which she has apparently been going to every Wednesday at the same time for three months. At least that's what she told me. Of course, she had to open the chat for that. My questions remained unanswered. To be honest, I'm sitting here in shock and don't know what to do. I always thought I had an incredibly good knowledge of human nature. But here I was invariably outclassed. I should have listened to my intuition. None of this makes sense to me. I have a bunch of questions in my head that I can't answer and never will be able to answer. But I have to accept that if I even have to seek professional help. Did she ever want to meet? Was she really just making fun of me? Why all this effort, all these nights? She told me so much about herself and her family. What was the truth, what was a lie? Did she perhaps get back together with her ex because he kept in touch? Does this ex even exist? What exactly happened during the last phone call? Was someone there? Did she let friends talk her into it? And the most important thing I will never know: why? This is the first time I've ever talked to anyone about it. This is the first time I've taken a step back and tried to look at it from the outside. And I don't understand how naive I could have been. Apparently I really wished it would work out. But now I'm ashamed and just feel like a stupid, naive child. To be honest, this kind of situation is new to me. I don't even know if this is the right subreddit. I'm overwhelmed and don't know what kind of advice I need at the moment. The important thing right now would probably be damage limitation and not getting carried away. Has anyone here had similar experiences? No matter which side. A friend told me that he once read about this kind of person in a magazine and that it was a kind of personality disorder. It would be very interesting to know what kind of person is capable of this. I know that I'm not perfect and that I certainly didn't always act perfectly during the 5 months. Unfortunately, I can only report here from my perspective. For obvious reasons, I can no longer get a second opinion. She always told me I did nothing wrong and how much of a good man I was, especially when we couldn‘t meet again. I look forward to your answers, advice and hearing about your own experiences. Feel free to let me know what you think about all this. Thanks for reading this far. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I (m28) met her (f30) online. After 5 months I was suddenly ghostet out of nowhere while on a phonecall. | 2 | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1egu9en/i_m28_met_her_f30_online_after_5_months_i_was/ |
wayNotPop | 2024-06-19 01:02:33 | 1,718,758,953 | 0 | ['matches'] | 0 | 1dj6pb6 | true | null | 9 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/1dj6pb6/how_to_lose_rejection_sensitivity_will_i_get/ | 1 | Took me (26M) a lot of courage to finally start trying to find a girlfriend. It didn't happened to me naturally through friend's friends, in school or group activities so I installed some apps. Thought I was going to get zero matches. Every man talks like it's the worse thing in the world for average men. But I've gave it a shot. What worse thing that could happen? Had 2 matches in 2 days! One didn't respond and the other was pretty nice. We immediately clicked and talked for hours. She had the same interests as me, was so pretty, funny and smart. I'm too stupid and intense. I was already in love. So I asked her out and she said no and that she only sees me as friend. I really thouht I was tougher than that. I was so happy and motivated. Even talked about her to my therapist. Now I'm here crying over someone I've met 2 days ago. Will I build thicker skin over time? I have values and it's not like I will start hating women over something so stupid like that. But I know there's a huge difference in numbers between men and women in those apls and I should get used to rejection. Feeling invisible and undatable is hard | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How to lose rejection sensitivity? Will I get thicker skin over time? | 1 | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1dj6pb6/how_to_lose_rejection_sensitivity_will_i_get/ |
noideawbu | 2021-02-06 13:19:43 | 1,612,617,583 | null | ['dating apps'] | 0 | ldxirw | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/ldxirw/how_to_deal_with_rejections/ | 1 | I would say I am metally strong person but the last three years have taken quite a toll on me. I am 27 year old brown guy. Three years ago, I moved out of my country and started working on a high paying job. I am not physically attractive as per social standards. Every now and then, I find people giving me weird looks even though I smell nice, dress up properly and do the best I can. You know, when you sit next to someone in subway and they standup and sit somewhere else. Or you are walking on the street and the person walking in front of you keep looking back like he is being followed. I am used to it now. I can only change myself and not someone else. I earn well, have a permanent respectable job, have my own apartment, don't smoke or do drugs, am friendly and nice but don't know why can't I make friends. For the last three years, I am kind of lonely just working, eating and sleeping. Haven't made any friend in new city since last three years. Living alone sucks! I desperately looked on dating apps but no luck there. Everytime I say "Hi" to someone I always get the same reply, "Sorry not my type". I don't know whose type I am. Haven't found it in three years. When a few says so, it's easy to move on. When everyone you text says so, it kinda hurts. The worst is when someone says "Good luck with you search" . Like why are you saying that you don't even mean. You haven't given me a chance to write even a second message, I am not asking for sex or anything. You can waste all day talking to stupid trolls but you can't even chat a few messages to find out what I have to offer? At this point I am puzzled and don't know what I am doing with my life. I am done. What advice do you have for me? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | How to deal with rejections? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/ldxirw/how_to_deal_with_rejections/ |
ItsAThrowaway05 | 2021-05-29 08:13:15 | 1,622,275,995 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | nniqgk | true | Venting | 28 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/nniqgk/today_i_realized_how_lonely_i_am_right_before_a/ | 47 | I don't really expect anyone to read this. I just use these forums to blast my thoughts and feelings into the anonymous void, and somehow it helps me. She here it is. All I want is someone to date. I want to meet someone and fall in love slowly as we get to know each other and just enjoy our lives together. I haven't had sex since my last relationship 6 months ago. But I really haven't even been trying to meet people. I met this one girl I really liked, we have a lot in common, we hung out quite a bit but for whatever reason she lost interest and I quit trying because I didn't want to force something with someone who didn't want to make an effort to see me. Then today I met my new neighbor. She's really cute. So we're talking while we're doing laundry. And it's going well. I ask her to a little concert that's happening tomorrow. She says yes, we trade numbers. Anyway she hit me up tonight and was like, "you got movies" and I'm like yeah come over. She gets to my place and she's just drunk. And I'm sure it could have gone one way, but I just felt weird with someone who definitely couldn't drive and maybe couldn't consent. Honestly idk where that line is. But I knew if I tried anything I would have been questioning it the rest of my life So I just put on Netflix and sat down and watched it and kept my distance and it was awkward and then she's like, "I'm going to go back to my place" and it was just down the hall so I knew she could make it there safely so I just said sure. We hugged and I walked her to the door. I texted her after just hoping I didn't make things weird and maybe hopefully we can try again when she's sober but I kinda get the feeling that won't happen. Which is fine. Based on the 2 minutes of talking to drunk her we just seem like we're two different people. She's not my girl. Now I'm just sad. I want a relationship. And for the last 6 months I've been thinking about downloading tinder again for some hookups but I could have had one Tonight but all I could think about was how I just wanted emotional connection with someone. I am just so fucking lonely in this world, I have no one to share my passions and interests with and it just sucks. And I kinda didn't realize how down I was till tonight. I just want to give my love to someone who wants it. But I can't find them And I'm sad. Idk how to connect with people. That's it. Dating sucks. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Today I realized how lonely I am right before a hookup | null | 0.89 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/nniqgk/today_i_realized_how_lonely_i_am_right_before_a/ |
natericamalea777 | 2015-11-07 05:22:48 | 1,446,873,768 | 0 | ['dating app'] | 0 | 3ruwpm | null | null | 1 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/3ruwpm/dating_app/ | 0 | LOV is a revolutionary new dating app for finding dates nearby that lead to Honest relationships. Using your social activity, we are able to match people based on who they truly are. People who meet have better first dates and find long-term relationships sooner. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Dating App | 0 | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/3ruwpm/dating_app/ |
[deleted] | 2019-09-18 19:46:46 | 1,568,836,006 | null | null | 0 | d633b9 | true | null | 31 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/d633b9/dont_give_up_hope/ | 16 | I finally found someone. We dated in previous and decided to give it a go again. We are beyond happy. Best of luck to you all! | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Don’t give up hope! | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/d633b9/dont_give_up_hope/ |
brashet | 2012-09-24 02:06:47 | 1,348,452,407 | 0 | ['online dating'] | 0 | 10de6m | null | null | 0 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/10de6m/asking_for_a_another_chance/ | 2 | So some background on me: 28m who has not dated in a long time. I have had only one "serious" girlfriend a few years back and I don't have much of a social circle to meet new people because of a short bout of depression I went through in the past that really destroyed my social life. Few weeks ago I decided to give online dating another chance, usually I just get frustrated with it and give up. Well I finally had this girl express interest after I messaged her, we exchanged numbers and would text or talk on the phone almost daily. Our phone conversations were great and we were both excited to go on our first date. Unfortunately the date did not go so well. I was very nervous and did not feel that I truly acted like myself and could tell she was losing some interest in me. After, we talked on the phone a bit and she said she would still like to go out again despite it all. Second date was a short dinner that I thought went a bit better than the first time in which after she said she did not want to see each other again. I guess I'm really lost on what went wrong. Over the phone things were great, we clicked on so many topics and both expressed interest in each other. I'm sure it was when meeting in person she began to have second thoughts about me and I feel that it had to due with my nervousness around not having been out on dates in some time. Part of me really wants to contact her and see if she is willing to give it another go, but at the same time knowing her no nonsense attitude I doubt she would be up for it. Any thoughts, Reddit? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Asking for a another chance? | 2 | null | http://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/10de6m/asking_for_a_another_chance/ |
SovietGeronimo | 2021-11-06 04:38:18 | 1,636,173,498 | null | ['matches'] | 0 | qnsx0g | true | I Need Advice | 2 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/qnsx0g/trying_speeddating_again_need_help/ | 1 | Hello i am 26 years old Man and i will participate in an online speeddating event next week. I look for advice of any kind because my first speeddating experience felt like it went well but I didn't got any matches. So I would love to know what are question I should ask and how can I prevent a situation where I am the interviewer? I could also use some dressing advice, like something you like to see on guys but they rarely wear it. Also I am from Germany, while I think that dating doesn't differ much from countries, I would style like to hear from women from Germany about their dating experiences. Yea I hope it goes well and I wish everyone reading a happy day. :) | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Trying Speeddating again need help. | null | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/qnsx0g/trying_speeddating_again_need_help/ |
floridagirl739 | 2020-10-09 06:04:36 | 1,602,223,476 | null | ['OLD'] | 0 | j7tqa2 | true | Question | 3 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/j7tqa2/dating_for_active_duty_military_female/ | 2 | Hi all, The title basically says it all. I am 34, active duty female, who is recently divorced after 12 year relationship (8 years of that was marriage). That basically means i spent most of my 20s and early 30s in a relationship. Now with COVID its pretty much impossible to meet people in real life, so I have turned to OLD. I live in the deep South, so most of the people here I have absolutely nothing in common with (I am also Russian, born and raised). Everything I get from guys is some variations of compliments that have to do with being Russian or my physical appearance. Or straight up question like: Whats the catch? Why are you single? To add to all this i refuse to date more than 1 person at a time, and when i am seeing someone, i dont go on the apps and let other guys know i am interested in someone at this moment. They seem to appreciate the honesty, i absolutely refuse to ghost people. I guess my question is: has any military gals/guys had success with OLD? Have you had instances when even if you liked someone they got spooked by the fact that you are here only temporarily, and will be getting stationed somewhere else eventually? (Had that happen to me) Especially if your background was completely different than the dating pool of the area you were living in? Thanks in advance! | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Dating for Active Duty Military female? | null | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/j7tqa2/dating_for_active_duty_military_female/ |
bradycorey47 | 2018-12-25 19:10:17 | 1,545,765,017 | null | ['dating apps'] | 0 | a9hed2 | true | null | 6 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/a9hed2/reconnected_with_a_girl_25f_who_rejected_me_25f_6/ | 2 | So basically, asked a girl out who I really liked, got rejected. She didn't initiate anything afterwards and I didn't either. Then a week ago she messaged me out of the blue 6 months later asking how I've been. We chatted a bit and I asked her out to lunch to catch up. It went really well, basically she apologized for being MIA but also teased me about "ghosting" her. We talked about dating a bit lightheartedly and she was very ambiguous with "I never said never" but she's also never been in a relationship before. She also knows I'm on dating apps and stuff and teased me a bit about that. We agreed to be less distant with each other. I'm definitely interested in her but thinking the ball is in her court now if she rejected me 6 months ago? Or I could potentially ask her out one last time and see where it goes (since the lunch was more of a catchup thing but I'm thinking it's not the best idea). Any advice? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Reconnected with a girl (25F) who rejected me (25F) 6 months ago | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/a9hed2/reconnected_with_a_girl_25f_who_rejected_me_25f_6/ |
M_Aurelius1 | 2024-08-05 17:40:34 | 1,722,879,634 | 0 | ['dating apps'] | 0 | 1eku08v | true | Question | 149 | 0 | /r/datingoverforty/comments/1eku08v/i_recently_started_looking_at_the_dating_apps/ | 0 | Recently got out of a 7 month unhealthy situationship/relationship. Working on myself for now and not planning on dating again anytime soon but was just curious to see what’s out there. Anyone else notice a lack of attractive women or men on the apps right now? | datingoverforty | t5_su6ij | I recently started looking at the dating apps again and it seems like there are very few women that I am even remotely attracted to right now. | 0 | 0.48 | https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverforty/comments/1eku08v/i_recently_started_looking_at_the_dating_apps/ |
Rhyav | 2019-07-20 21:30:11 | 1,563,658,211 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | cfr5lx | true | null | 36 | 0 | /r/AskMen/comments/cfr5lx/what_do_you_expect_or_look_for_in_a/ | 19 | From two different sources: someone that started off as a real-life friend, and someone you meet from Tinder that says is looking for friends-with-benefits. What do you expect from each? Where do YOU draw the line that differentiates friendship from a relationship? | AskMen | t5_2s30g | What do you expect or look for in a friends-with-benefits relationship? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/cfr5lx/what_do_you_expect_or_look_for_in_a/ |
holarymade | 2019-02-07 19:42:56 | 1,549,568,576 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | ao7n7i | true | null | 5 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/ao7n7i/what_to_think_about_that_answer_from_girl/ | 1 | Maybe wrong subreddit, but question for women. Went to tinder date with this 26 year old girl and 1 week later another date. After both date she said that she had great time and was happy that i asked her out. Few days after second date i noticed that her response time to my texts got longer and i felt like she didn't wanted to keep conversation going. So i asked her to meet same day, but she said that she don't have time because of work. I went silent for a week. No contact from her. So i sent message and asked for a reason why she lost interest. Her response was: "I can't say i lost interest .. but time has gone fast and i have been really busy. Also you haven't shown any interest :)". I replied that i didn't write to her because i felt she lost interest and i wanted to test if my insight is right. No response from her now for a 3 days. I'm i right that she actually don't have any interest? If you think that i'm correct, why is it so hard for girls to just say it out ? If you think that i'm wrong. What should i do? Should i contact again or just wait if she will show any interest. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | What to think about that answer from girl | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/ao7n7i/what_to_think_about_that_answer_from_girl/ |
uknonuthingjonsnuuu | 2015-10-30 20:59:53 | 1,446,238,793 | 0 | ['tinder'] | 0 | 3qw0j5 | null | null | 11 | null | /r/dating_advice/comments/3qw0j5/i_know_literally_nothing_about_dating/ | 26 | I'm a 22 year old recent college grad who has no idea how to even start dating. I've only been on one sort of date in my life, and even that was just a quick arrangement from Tinder that I feel I kind of bombed since I didn't get a second one. I don't know how to approach women, I don't know how to talk to them, I don't know what "dates" even really are, or how to properly flirt. I feel kind of like my only hope romantically is if I either hit the gym really hard and just become as physically attractive as possible or if I somehow get rich, that way my social ineptitude will be masked by other redeeming qualities. Regardless, I feel kind of lost and hopeless, is there any advice anyone has to help me feel less so? | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | I know literally nothing about dating. | 26 | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/3qw0j5/i_know_literally_nothing_about_dating/ |
MFRobots | 2020-06-05 12:13:54 | 1,591,359,234 | null | null | 0 | gx3f3d | true | null | 7 | 0 | /r/OnlineDating/comments/gx3f3d/made_fun_of_the_maga_hat_wearers_in_the_areaand/ | 0 | There had been this woman in my area that pointed out specifically where she lived (not the address) and I realized that's major horse country. She had "other ethnicity" as your race. Pretty attractive, she seemed educated I suppose. Anyways, I opened with how I've noticed she's been on the site for a while and I bet living in the remote area like she does, it's mostly camo wearing toothless rednecks and MAGA hat wearing types. lol. She responded with, "I voted Trump AND, I'm voting again...have a good day" I did find it kind of usual someone with an ethnicity listed as "other" as minorities have a beef with Trump. I was like "Ouch, that was unexpected" lol I do have a thing to say about people who voted for Trump and have NOT learned their lesson by voting for him again. | OnlineDating | t5_2qpe9 | Made fun of the MAGA hat wearers in the area...and well... | null | 0.2 | https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/gx3f3d/made_fun_of_the_maga_hat_wearers_in_the_areaand/ |
sk_98 | 2019-08-11 07:31:13 | 1,565,508,673 | null | ['tinder'] | 0 | coty7s | true | null | 29 | 0 | /r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/coty7s/is_it_stupid_to_use_tinder_if_im_not_looking_for/ | 0 | For context, my definition of a hook-up is meeting someone and having sex with them the first time you see them - this is something I'm not comfortable with. I'm asking this because a lot of times guys ask me "So what are you looking for on this application?" and as much as I hate that question I usually responded "Nothing serious", which led them to believe I am ready to have sex with them immediately. 1) How do you respond to that question without sounding like a dick? I feel like what I'm looking for would depend on who I meet right? Again, I'm not looking for anything serious. Just a consensual casual thing with a normal person but I do feel like I need to meet them a couple of times before I'm comfortable enough to have sex with them. 2) Has anyone had any success using tinder to find something like that? Is it the norm to just have sex on the first date? Do men take that initial rejection to the invitation of sex well? | TwoXChromosomes | t5_2r2jt | Is it stupid to use Tinder if I'm not looking for a hook-up? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/coty7s/is_it_stupid_to_use_tinder_if_im_not_looking_for/ |
mrsjackwhite | 2022-06-28 04:17:43 | 1,656,389,863 | null | ['OLD', 'dating site'] | 0 | vme7rq | true | null | 17 | 0 | /r/datingoverfifty/comments/vme7rq/dating_site_that_hides_your_profile/ | 9 | My hairdresser told me that she found her BF on an OLD site that charged a bit extra to hide her profile from everyone except for the men that she "liked". This was several years ago, and she couldn't remember the name of the site. I like this idea, does anyone know which site this is? If I try OLD again, I'll probably give that a try. | datingoverfifty | t5_12ieog | dating site that hides your profile? | null | 0.91 | https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/vme7rq/dating_site_that_hides_your_profile/ |
myburnerforthissub | 2019-11-01 00:26:30 | 1,572,567,990 | null | ['okcupid'] | 0 | dpwpa7 | true | Vent/Rant | 17 | 0 | /r/dating/comments/dpwpa7/halloween_plans_ruined_for_3rd_date_now_i_need_to/ | 1 | Was going out with this woman tonight for the third time (met on okcupid). I really like her. So far we've had a good connection. Taking it slow. We were going to a Halloween costume party at a bar tonight and two days ago I got a cold. I was hoping it would go away or I'd just power through it but by this afternoon I knew I wouldn't be able to go out, especially given that it's cold outside and we were going to be at a crowded bar, dancing, etc. I had a costume (so did she) and everything. So finally I can't prolong it and I text her and let her know. She says she understands and that maybe we can go out sometime next week. Now I feel like there's no chance we hang out again. I could be wrong. I apologized and told her I was sorry for waiting so long to cancel but I was hoping to feel better to go out. She says she understands. If she's mature, she'll be cool with it. But it was only going to be our third date and there's just not much information to go on whether she'll want to give it another shot or not. I was so ready for this date too. I couldn't wait. It's so difficult to meet cool people and I'm not happy this turned out like this tonight. | dating | t5_2qhb1 | Halloween plans ruined for 3rd date, now I need to vent. | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/dpwpa7/halloween_plans_ruined_for_3rd_date_now_i_need_to/ |
cscx | 2020-01-07 10:20:02 | 1,578,392,402 | null | ['dating apps'] | 0 | el9ri9 | true | null | 10 | 0 | /r/dating_advice/comments/el9ri9/is_there_some_kind_of_absolute_beginners_guide/ | 23 | I'm almost 27 (m), never dated or even asked a girl out. I've been told all my life that girls hate being approached, asked for numbers, etc., and dating apps have been a total busy for me. Wtf am I supposed to do? Do I just find random women I find attractive and say, "hi, I'd like to get to know you better, can I get your phone number"? After that, what do I even say? Is that even okay? I never get the chance to just comfortably talk and get to know people naturally, so I feel like I need to push it. I need a guide for what to do, what to say, and how to say it. At this point I'm willing to risk my good reputation at work by asking girls out, I just need to know how. | dating_advice | t5_2s4kl | Is there some kind of absolute beginners guide for adults? | null | null | https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/el9ri9/is_there_some_kind_of_absolute_beginners_guide/ |
End of preview. Expand
in Data Studio
The Reddit Online Dating Dataset ( RODD)
The Reddit Online Dating Dataset (RODD) is a collection of 219000 English text-based Reddit submissions related to online dating.
Dataset Details
Dataset Description
RODD was created to study gender and age-based differences in experiences of online dating fatigue and online dating etiquette as part of my master's thesis @TUM:
"Online Dating Etiquette: An NLP-based Approach to Online Dating Discourses on Reddit"
We leveraged NLP-based methods to analyze the submissions both quantitatively and qualitatively, uncovering significant demographic differences in fatigue experiences.
The Reddit submissions in this dataset are related to online dating. Further, we show that a large number of submissions show signs of dating fatigue. Thus, the overall tone of the dataset is negative.
Online daters discuss topics related to online dating and share their negative experiences, give and receive advice, and seek support and orientation online. Many submission authors provide their opinion on existing behavioral rules in online dating.
- Curated by: [More Information Needed]
- Funded by [optional]: [More Information Needed]
- Shared by [optional]: [More Information Needed]
- Language(s) (NLP): [More Information Needed]
- License: [More Information Needed]
Dataset Sources [optional]
RODD was created as part of a study @TUM on online dating fatigue and online dating etiquette:
"Online Dating Etiquette: An NLP-based Approach to Online Dating Discourses on Reddit"
- Repository: [More Information Needed]
- Paper [optional]: [More Information Needed]
- Demo [optional]: [More Information Needed]
Uses
The dataset can be used for several NLP tasks, incl. classification and sentiment analysis. We further provide the dataset for future research on online dating.
"link_flair_text" are human gold labels for semantic and sentiment categorization, provided by the submission authors on creation when the subreddit enforces the topical categorization of new submissions.
Sentiment analysis with SiEBERT shows that models are generally able to detect intricacies in text from our dataset.
Direct Use
[More Information Needed]
Out-of-Scope Use
[More Information Needed]
Dataset Structure
- Column - Description - Data type
- author - Account that created the submission. - str
- created - Time of creation. - datetime
- created_utc - UTC timestamp of creation time. - float
- downs - Number of downvotes. - float
- extraction_keywords - The keywords that led to the extraction of the submission. - array[str]
- gilded - Number of gildings. - float
- id - Unique submission identifier. Primary Key. - str
- is_crosspostable - If the submission is crosspostable to other subreddits. - bool
- link_flair_text - Category of the submission. (If categorization is supported.) - str
- num_comments - Number of comments. - int
- num_crossposts - Number of crossposts. - float
- permalink - Internal Reddit permalink. - str
- score - Difference of upvotes and downvotes. - int
- selftext - Text of the submission. - str
- subreddit - Subreddit name. - str
- subreddit_id - Subreddit identifier. - str
- title - Title of the submission - str
- ups - Number of upvotes. - float
- upvote_ratio - Upvotes / Downvotes - float
- url - URL of the submission. - str
Dataset Creation
Curation Rationale
In order to study online dating fatigue and etiquette related to online dating, this dataset was created by scraping Reddit submissions using keywords related to online dating. The keyword set was iteratively refined to ensure high precision in selecting relevant submissions while capturing a broad range of discussions within the online dating discourse. Subreddits were hand-selected for scraping based on two criteria: 1) high activity and member count, indicating general popularity. 2) As indicated in community guidelines, A second group of subreddits was selected based on self-reported specific demographic focus.
Language Variety
The submissions were extracted in late 2024 from English-speaking subreddits. While information about the varieties and dialects used is not available, it is most likely that all mainstream forms of English are included.
Speaker Demographic
Reddit encourages anonymity, making it impossible to characterize the demographics of this dataset's 140000 unique accounts. However, it is advised to consider the demographics of both general Reddit users and online dating app users when using this data. Based on observations, this dataset contains submissions written by both females and males, many gender identities, ethnicities, people of different socioeconomic backgrounds, and different age groups ranging from teenagers to individuals over 50. A great proportion of submissions is most likely from Western societies. Some of the included subreddits do not specify their intended member demographic, while others define themselves as communities for either female or male audiences or specific age groups.
Speech Situation
This dataset comprises written, sometimes edited submissions published before October 2024. During the creation of this dataset, all submissions of the selected subreddits were used for scraping, collecting submissions created between early 2010 and September 2024. Users submit to seek advice, initiate discussions, share experiences and opinions, and ask questions about online dating. Reddit facilitates a "roughly synchronous" interaction setting where users submit and respond within a threaded format, with response times varying from minutes to days.
Text Characteristics
Each submission includes a non-empty title and a non-empty text body (selftext). Overall text length varies with a mean and standard deviation of 1300 characters per submission. 1300 characters roughly translate to 200-260 words in English texts.
Provenance Appendix
This data was extracted from "Pushshift Dumps", a publicly available archive of Reddit data collected over time via the Pushshift API. The Pushshift API provides researchers and moderators access to historical Reddit data, including submissions and comments, mirroring the official Reddit data that is not publicly accessible.
Source Data
Data Collection and Processing
The submissions of RODD were extracted through a keyword-based filtering approach on all submissions in the following subreddits:
- r/dating_advice
- r/dating
- r/OnlineDating
- r/datingoverthirty
- r/datingoverforty
- r/datingoverfifty
- r/AskMen
- r/AskWomen
- r/TwoXChromosomes
We used the following keywords to match submission titles and selftext:
Bias, Risks, and Limitations
RODD comprises a large portion of negative Reddit submissions. Self-selection bias leads to a concentration of fatigued online daters from Western societies in \ac{RODD}. Thus, content related to online dating fatigue is more prevalent than in other discourses or demographics. This content is specific to the Reddit online dating discourse.
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