private function longhandOptions($options)
    {
        // Call static method.  You don't pass the paranethesis
        // to static calls
        if (preg_match('#::.+\(\)#', $options)) {
            return call_user_func(substr($options, 0, strlen($options) - 2));
        }

        // Return static variable
        if (preg_match('#::\$#', $options)) {
            list($class, $var) = explode('::$', $options);

            return $class::$$var;
        }

        // Unknown format
        throw new Exception('Could not parse option: '.$options);
    }