Question: I didn't see a related or similar question, but if you can find one, please link it and I'll close this.

**Background**

I had little experience in high school and college and learned some of my skills later. My first two serious girlfriends were in my twenties and they both cheated. From this I realized I didn't enjoy serious relationships, so I've avoided them. I have always been honest about this with people I date: "I'm just having fun and don't want this to ever get serious." This is my way of making it clear so that if the person wants "something more" - like marriage - they can move on faster. I just want to have fun - hang out, party, etc with the expectation that we'll be together for a few months with no intention of it leading to cohabitation or marriage.

I live in the US and am about to be 30.

My latest three dating experiences have ended with the other person upset about the relationship not becoming more serious, even though I made it clear that I would never get serious with the person.

*Example:*

> 
> Me (initially): I don't do serious relationship; no boyfriend/girlfriend - just hanging out and having fun together.  
> 
>  Her (initially): Great, I'm not looking for anything serious either. 
> 
> 
> 

> 
> Her (later): So we've been seeing each other for a few months ... [or some derivative that usually starts a conversation about where is this going, even though we both agreed initially "nowhere"].
> 
> 
> 

**Problem**

When I meet someone to date, how can I communicate clearly that I am **only** interested in a casual/short-term dating relationship, such as dating for a few months by doing fun activities, going to parties, attending concerts, etc?

Answer: 
I don't see *sex* mentioned anywhere, or in reply to Catija's comments. It matters.

If you want to make it crystal clear that you're not interested in any long-term relationships, then put a time limit on it. Honest. Otherwise there's a good chance that the person you're "having fun with" might think they can change your mind. Let them know they can't. So, to pick up where you left off:

> 
> You: I don't do serious relationship; no boyfriend/girlfriend - just hanging out and having fun together. [If you also want sex, add that between "hanging out" and "having fun", i.e., "just hanging out, having sex, and having fun together."]  
> 
>  Her: Great, I'm not looking for anything serious either.  
> 
>  You: Really? Great! Because I'm in it for no more than three months at the most, then I'm gone to greener pastures, I promise you. But in the meantime, if you want to have fun [(and sex)], and don't mind that I'm dating others at the same time, I'd love to take you out.
> 
> 
> 

If she goes out with you and complains when you tell her it's over in three months or less, she has absolutely no right to complain.

It's honest, straightforward, and real. Don't be surprised if you don't get many takers, though. But that's good. You don't want to disappoint anyone.
Short term dating relationships are just that *short term.* Meaning that regardless of how you try to frame it, you can only push them so long before people want or expect more.

I applaud your being honest about your intentions, telling people upfront what you're looking for is a good first step, but then you have to be willing to follow through and keep the relationship short. 

There's no black and white rule for how long you'll be able to ride one of these situations out before feelings develop, so if it seems like people are getting more attached than you're comfortable with after a few months, you may want to keep things more in the few weeks range.

As an aside I would advise you to get over your fear of being cheated on. It's better to have loved and lost n' all. [Also while dating like this can be fun for a while, it very often gets harder as you get older.](https://youtu.be/ruR4uI8Ift8)