spend life computeri many reallife friends family ones always busy online friends feel detached cant see touch them im trying make new friends hard okcupid craigslist kind hit miss seems like whenever get tired get suicidal fucking sucks disability know heal mental physical illnesses permanent solution permanent problems even work bc x offed got sent back entities side whats point really time yet well get time im tired human form want nonphysical realms let reincarnate better avatar memory wipe time fuck gotta love kids start chanting head saying stuff like cut bleed pool blood need shoot head pull trigger im dead whatnot mouth babes right non physical friends physical friends plus dad died weeks ago would nice join him guess sleep ill wake feeling better tomorrow til tomorrow night ill probably get feeling way again every day exactly same fucking mood swings guess stuff live enough reasons too