im  death away hitting  top life stressor one year im figuring may well mine complete setadd severe depression lifetime struggle failure led here left job hated last september getting fire could get unemployment wanted work since depression wasis bad enough marriage ending im bought half home sent way behavior bad hurtful woman loved cant forgive cant deal anymore got medication time late fix this exwife already boyfriend dumping come back never come back notated do relationship wise never walks path twice path over let go long time ago hiding suffering trying protect her let go too nothing do go one love one love way either acquaintances friends family useless tell devil somehow fairy tale bullshit cant help therapy feels worthless feel better talking pro right now option worse ending feeling better abhor idea cant meet ok continuing live ive done without her even worse somehow actually happy without her person exist think allow it tminus  days approximately everything final officially im sure want make  hours longer love im longer responsibility ive already come several plans signed dead man switch started working letter auto send do hell hit  stressors one year