im complete controli know do guys want kill myself im afraid im going tothe thoughts control say no theres people love hurt control anymore want it me im  year old girl cant go get help parents think want attention im afraid contact anyone else lot friends throwaway account theres teacher reads posts mess lately want anyone get annoyed messed give me  people right basically have want anything ive found thoughts take make stuff almost cut days ago even thinking automatic happy today felt surreal me crying help inside want go home school im safe theres always people around keep anything stupid family house means alone told this might hurt me know scare me want it want it both im finally losing marbles terrifying plan im okay thoughts betraying me im trapped theres nothing it  hours later edit oh god please help me