interested going onso last couple year suicidal thought growing growing spending lots time therapy spent two stays hospital still come empty every medication book yet really complete success im surrounded extremely supportive family friends truly care much really good day enjoy thing constantly try new things hopes helping try best exercising regularly eating well enough yet change feel problem often not feel depressed unhappy dont feel much anything dont feel weight failure anything dont desire keep going would prefer stop working long diving back far can honestly say felt way since   years old im  really feel like im staying around dont want hurt family friends sibling take life around age years back watch completely destroy parents siblings cant bring put that feel trapped situation dont really know next spent every bit money traveling trying new places hoping best feeling stayed dont know really go here