im really hungry emotions brought death death looks like butterflies rainbows mewhat really want really need right power power ignored preferably something flashy could destroy world it know im never going get something like that much imagination know humans lot power themselves looks small expectations human pretty easily lot quite criminal but newsworthy things human always make someone ignore force conscience thats stopping me no ive lost long time ago maybe never that frankly care im afraid consequences right now constant feeling anxiety makes constantly want puke cant even sleep it feel like mind mine think stay relatively rational going drift away feel like one day truly lose sense value thinking give insanity thats burst feel like ill wake monster become numb consequences actions go rampage get killed process even now im getting excited giddy prospect that hold back kinda painful hold real back harshly though ill endure now know exactly im excited something like that able cry long time ive barely felt emotion long time want able cry want able cry guilt something ive done want feel emotions someone recommended watching sad movies great im used tropes look boring me someone else recommended video games once cut it like gore whatever disgusting apparently really want control emotions others blood matter personal taste guess anyways wanted write somewhere ill go sleep look wake hopefully itll help endure little bit longer really really love life guess im terrified prospect forgetting that right sub this im depressed like many you im insane well whatever