looking way commit redflagi  yo india sorry make mistakes idea commit redflag mind last  year since rd june  exact yesterday enough made mind kill myself dont figured way kill figure today best tomorrowif suggestion please share coming reason committing redflag parents said previously india india thing called culture grants basically infinite powers parents whatever shit get saying thinking best you means verbally abusive physically abusive control whatever life meet not remember said  yes still living even  bcoz incompetent pussy bcoz elder brother different city job let go even life changing oppourtunities past said guilt trapped saying dont think care me also brother last time saw year half ago thing remember telling problems saying let go bcoz parents cant anything it mother also same whenever something happens answer son forget move on even father verbally abuses me call shits like disgrace sisterfucker mistake forget it even beats whenever angry forget it still dont get it father verbal physical abuser remember said life changing oppourtunity guilt trapped give bcoz meant living different city yeah point father made financially viable enough handle expenses living different city basically poor are wealthy barely getting food tables dad money sent away enough put food table enough buy bottle rum every single day get drunk shouting reason go sleep give example yesterday even today father verbally abused bcoz going library study give context father like go outside libraries places study bcoz thinks making excuses get house hang friends reality want peace house cant get bcoz things happened coming back story want go wouldve son dont go library no said and paraphrasing except cussing threats  motherfucker piece shit want show things wanna teach us huh sisterfucker huh mean never grow up nobody going anywhere see leave house gonna break legs trying teach dont know daily routine get ready  morning leave library yesterday dont know happened yes this today thing topic adding new abuses new threats like bastard gonna shoot me things father family whole think sums this bcoz one incident going things whole life yes decided kill me dont know how soon figured it again ideas plz share