career chose process making rich also extremely depressed overworkedoverjudged point least one episode day want curl disappear job involves social media fame expectation perfection sometimes sure much handle human break able make real friends family never begin with relationship someone cared pursuit wellbeing people respect name almost daily disrespect person makes sense people always watching extremely careful almost feels like redflag now people around want something me also constantly comparing body next best thing type industry in mentally draining would wish fame anyonei wanted see anyone advice me going therapy still super depressive episodes  lot regret pursuing loved much everything sacrifice success words advice successful depressed