one would believe told anywaysi early s want anymore real disappointing part single lonely all good shape rarely trouble getting date educated two completely different high demand fields traveled met new people money live ok list goes absolutely zero interest anything long remember use activities distract me im running things do years ago diagnosed recurrent brief depression decades high functioning depression taken seriously mental professionals psychiatrist even told people sad one good day every  days rushing negative thoughts despair surrounding it ive tried  different types medications affect even gone strict vegetarian see would help not definitely someone people would suspected would die redflag even way anticlimatic want out depression worst disease anyone burdened with burden