father told didnt balls kill myselflast year diagnosed bipolar got committed mental institutions various times suicidal ideation  attempt october flew tijuana bought phenobarbital flew mexico city always one favorite cities wanted see one last time died miserable raining didnt get spark first visited finally wrote letter aunt father turned phone scared drinking phenobarbital put aside went sleep woken mexican police around am im quite sure found me know dad called police san francisco maybe coordinated embassy airbnb dont really know family buy ticket escorted way onto plane able go meds good since yesterday dad confronted  gone missing he hides money place think forgot things get pretty heated tells didnt even balls kill myself one hurt time ill prove wrong