uncle died  want end like him im literally everything wrongmy uncle dads brother died heart attack  poor control diabetes numerous heart problems weighed  pounds died dad worked different jobs uncle would always great first weeksmonths work slowly start making excuses come started almost never going work always inevitably got fired could never hold job  months childhood adult life play video games always struggled weight type  diabetes never good control of im going exact path want fate know continue living going die turn  weigh  lbs im   years old poor control blood sugars i type  diabetes uncle type  theyre different diseases similar havehad poor control blood sugar though ive tried lose weight never find motivation so always end giving up never bring care blood sugar enough control well normally  prolonged exposure high blood sugar long period  years basically fucks nervous system toes start falling off lose feeling fingers eyes stop working correctly etc homeschooled life started high school last september well first months then started missing days sick eventually got point going couple times month where im now really stay home feel sad play video games even enjoy it feel uncomfortable im computer way grew  know anything else most homeschooled life spent pc always start stuff when homeschooled would work months slowly give stop easy stuff homework hard all cant bring it literally exactly uncle growing up dad told me fucking terrified me literally exact things im doing died  really want go path want end like uncle cant bring change need help anyone suggestions id much rather end life end path tldr uncle died  poor control diabetes lack motivation weight issues im issues too scaring me want die im  definitely continue path need help