deserve die knew would agreehi thanks clicking this never used verbalize frustrations life first clicked assume know depression suicidal ideation depression number psychologic physical factors range severity without possible symptoms suicidal ideation thoughts redflag may may intend act upon thats technical explanations go me believe deserve die irrational belief something done hate myself failure never good enough anything burden family cause pain suffering needlessly fail help around need most turned back unlike social pressures permanently ruined someone extremely close way fix it asshole around whether mean not mother thinks failure family would think failure knew sexual orientation failure father tell depression unable join military feel happy feel like want cry try cant plan kill soon make aduot hood plan attain low risk life insurance plan either drive cliff shoot one fathers shotguns failure everything else life family friends myself never plan life seems pointless look hope someones words sites like make feel something dont feel like coward already killed myself seems someone failure around told crimes would despise me despicable waste human space feels generous saying that hope understand premature death fairly inevitable feel need reply verbal manure supportive way rather way reminding atricities thank goodnight