anythingso hello know title seems overdramatic things enough keep living st time courage die live far away family live friend really care unless suits him cat born quite birth defects make hard live daily life that often call work days time gets trouble job cant get doctors note insurance im also trans want transition cant afford that im bedridden right best friend blaming things cant control parents begging come back home reason left really want kill care much hurts go through dont wanna put anyone trauma someone know committing redflag barely see think straight im really considering taking whole bottle sleeping aids letting