feel like ill taken seriously thats talk ramblingi tried getting help therapists physicians reddit places one seems able help posted another account ended deleted account got tired seeing this way long comments responses all want feel good every day gets harder harder tried killing laid couch taking half bottle pills felt really weird taking lots pills arms felt odd pressure them also felt light time exception sharp pain every while yet next day woke lots pain lived want try succeed guess killing harder thought im sure do ive tried taking risks investing stock market purchasing  lizards spending thousands them nice chunk change college student do feel like one help me want talk phone risk someone hearing live parents want text talk platform want someone cares  parents would sad think continue pain also realize odds anyone replying slim last times posted account it cant get help im going selfish a succeed time want feel better please help me  done crappy things life asked forgiveness tried making ammends starting believe attempted redflag actually died currently hell believe im real anymore