need helpim honestly quite new depressed ive depressed since february came really bad wave im sure became depressed did late february made first attempt bu drowning told newly made best friend hour later said would always support me was one point july become much though said couldnt deal anymore causing much stress life respected stopped relying her mid august made next attempt od went bed woke sick didnt tell one while finally mid september said wished told sooner couldve prevented it on began get better ive really well today ive known trendy political views im total conservative california last saturday fucked made post thats downright horrible today got call hss vice principal somebody apparently reported me said go saying things like did ill expelled really bad anxiety ill expelled really bad  gpa cant lose that ive put life school cant expelled cant ive talking bestie says im fault wont even acknowledge anxiety says fault shes person talk problems about doesnt even care said really offensive general ive always never knew think im terrible asshole feel alone nobody support im lost  hours plan take knife arteries want send bestie text saying much ill miss her fear shell call help im gone