cant rewind lifethis previous spring diagnosed severe depression anxiety seems people age currently  nd semester college ended going  sessions  credit hour classes never hit low semester done started lack motivation later snowballed anxiety fuck semester time nobody knew anything doing professors assumed dropped courses parents assumed still going classes friendsbrothers assumed missing classes im new college fact miss class major repercussions compared high school earlier anyways finally told friend mine still senior high school dealt attempted redflag sophomore high school told needed tell mom got hand took  weeks summoned courage tell via email even though still living due able pay overpriced dorms called next morning wanted come talk one schools she works teacher therapists things gave number clinic well therapists went there anyways  months seeing therapist well pills feeling better told im going try work without talk therapy still taking antidepressants somewhat worried trusted could handle it im utter bullshit  months nothing improved lied teeth true mood therapist simply cant deal myself ive felt like since  wore mask  worried appearance teenager since late bloomer large issue still wore mask it come age  friends started smokingdrinking everyone else it made decision based things seeing way changes them much pussy take hit none would happened wasnt would stayed group friends secluded everyone since anyone would do  nobody spent full year without single real friend mask school friends hid everyone pretty well parents knew ditched old group assumption fine since ive worn mask long basically become face  small group rarely goes out ive become addicted video games way bond people point am halfway  ive become someone never would thought become im normal looking overweight given compliments appearance well personality scared ever girlfriend im always complimented skills working teaching younger kids im working daycare nearly  years now cant handle anymore driving home tonight friends house realized its done mean this cant wear mask anymore im socially awkward call old therapist go tell truth way remove mask force am  morning im feeling nothing ive become completely numbed life things stopping pathetically video games fact one way road still know going back know anymore major tldr chronic depression going overboard know call help anymore