words bite assi  depressed last  years diagnosed  pediatric doctor last year started see therapistpsychaitrist always thought would live depression functional maybe low energy constant melancholy know functional part am work  days week apartment share boyfriend two beautiful wonderful cats whole life car pay bills without help anyone else last two three years pretty rough terrible breakup father passed away unexpectedly almost homeless different times finally got stable job last august many life issues before except fucking hate job really worst aspect life driven constant manic depressive state im miserable anything sleep go work fucking hate life nothing tried worked medicine exercise even self medicating booze weed work least long always said would never hurt kill permanent im fundamentally indecisive person ive never close before cant afford quit look something else hardly motivation energy apply something else job market hard here know else go talk to im never taken seriously sorry long post really need someone talk way vent