sure trying worth anymoreive trying get life sorted never works ultimately always fail  months year achieved anything time passes nothing ever changes im high school drop out  time tafe course drop job ive ever done cashier year  im  now real skills ambitions ive thinking another tafe course starting mid year im honestly sure even something worth trying know im probably going drop again friends either left become distant im close many family members one here could dissapear nobody would notice care absence know do killing seems like rational option here seems like kindest thing everyone around me im never going get better keep thinking tomorrow better next week better next year better never is anything everything getting worse im progressively becoming isolated genuinely know else except die