end mehi reddit since felt suicidal apparently now terrifying pain ahead feels terrifying too wanna live experience it alone work bawling eyes out cant keep shit together work mom run pharmacy together wanna call ask cover me want hear say like always job would allow this act like adult nobody gave lesiure young love her damn knows undermine me maybe right though im almost  weak like this anyways nasty nasty fight husband mean regrettable things said sides mostly his said mean it said sorry like every time knows sensitive yet still this say harsh words anger even less sensitive person would moved fucking shattered anyways hope yesterday showed empathy said want feel like shit this heard thought maybe work it today angry again hurt say hi morning seriously considering divorce needed time calm down angry saying take responsibility mean words expressing saying mean words himself got butthurt told stop talking turned phone even stay together this love him hard get together different circumstances much other separate mean failed again nothing  year old loser works mommy decide work deal said deal pain ruined experiences customers keep coming cannot put straight face front anymore takes energy battery drained pharmacy access poisons opportunity fall asleep never wake up one life hate throw away terrified whats it probably nothing terrifying too cant deal anymore failed everybody failed myself please blame husband reasons angry know it holy shit cant anymore please help