faultlong post here feeling lot emotions past months one really talk with ill post see happens ive married almost  years february  wife got married  years dating legal issues rush marriage matter days lawyers advice talked marriage bit before expecting make decision way fast forward around september  living together feeling happy feel like girl fell love changed marriage also things learned marriage know before fought lot clear different try talking times reaction always felt complaining her stopped point back september  met woman religious community  years older at time   married  kids worked together volunteer initiative community quickly became close month met routine texting every day almost day long fell head heels her made feel special like one ever before made feel like someone truly cared me really friends friend would tell things like would together next life met late life said husband together would together nothing wanted her certain would happy still feel way would share everything other time hiding conversations spouses never physical relationship never wanted that partly married partly emotional connection me continued year around september  told pregnant able talk like usual since husband would often she housewife husband would stay home often hurt lot  months okay work project kept mind november project over started thinking her ever since ive severely depressed reach her ask talk get treated almost stranger friends always tells time since busy always family always trusted her believe lying kills someone close made feel special could leave alone like pretty much been ive thinking redflag feel happy wife feel like friends feel like source depression something tell anyone know know situation get better think work family none enough make stop thinking ending all expect sympathy anyone know wrong feel whatever happening completely deserved bad person im reaping sow im simply sharing anyone else share with want happy