update tried hang myself much changed asking help againi posted day failed attempt hanging myself guard rail broke woke several hours later many problems complex ptsdhttpenwikipediaorgwikicomplex_posttraumatic_stress_disorder borderline personality disorder bipolar  anorexia improving still difficult therapist ive never told anything never told child prostitute witnessing murder gang raped  drug addict hard talk things person hard trust anybody irl information im alcoholic addict hurt everything else year best year life terms target behaviors im still miserable wanted vent thanks