goal life kill myselfthats it im longing friendsa partnera career anymore im able make meaningful connections anyone as cliche sounds nobody understands feel im tired surface level bullshit dont start talking depressed soon meet someone new im planning work ass find better job like yeah fill emotional void material things satisfactory feeling doesnt last long anyway survive current salary thats matters me ive enough trauma abuse im curious life offer anymore price ill pay even suffering dont wanna deal depression chronic illness puts pain almost every single day anymore sense purpose dreams besides dying thats way