dont deserve happyok lemmie start saying probably glad hear ive sort good place past week havent cynical pessimistic little shit people havent contemplated redflag first time long time im thinking right actually getting better another mood swing mean either way simply feel though dont deserve it tell theres people desperate feel happy probably need getting better am cuz may late me since post ive made  redflag attempts lifetime counting i really stop attempting unless im truly sure im gonna go it