ive decided diemy life circling drain long now ive treatment anxiety put stress relationship fucked up told afraid falling love incapable feeling love hes leaving now im young anymore friends getting married kidsim left dust hate myself cannot see future anymore honestly want try want stop suffering want lonely alone miss warmth someone holding night felt love long im hollow shell person ive already begun final arrangements things go know pets cared for really wish things could different me want go on going motions life never happy never anyone love me