suicidal thoughts  yearsidk start im suicidal thoughts like  years parents mother amp father used beat amp abuse bad words since  years old daily basis amp sometimes mom give food eat demotivate every time saying like nothing life im useless die im trash bullshit like daily basis amp threatened kick home cuz im adult  yo give svere depression amp anxiety like everyday amp sometimes cry hard  amp think commit redflag get free this many friends mom whenever friends come home mom say shit amp ever talk amp make fun me never shared anyone thought everyone make fun amp understand first time im writing subreddit thank reading sorry grammar mother tongue