think hold longeri feel horrible head hurts heart feels heavy little hard breathe cant think focus all everything foggy like head full invisible thoughts feel lonely alone feels like noone me used to cant depend longer really enough shoulders hurts receive things gave keep asking need want obvious want talk me even feel like it thats did literally told you like noone understands me feel misunderstood disrespected noone bothers message ask im feeling even said knew feel like crap hurts theyre ignoring me even get mad addressed issue emotions feel like driving frozen hill using summer tires actual health sinking like old broken ship grades terrible too funny used top student ive never beach ive never another country even visit capital country achieve much inspire anyone live start something truly awesome thats okay lived long enough emotions finally letting die sudden fake overconfidence happiness never happy extroverted feelings feel truly fake things want address  mother never hated you always loved you really hate actions towards me im sorry im way never asked asexual dumb burden im sorry tore dreams apart like hungry wolf searching food im sorry could never someone proud of  friend really enjoyed playing minecraft together hope like cathedral built friends wanted see  update axolotls stuff think happen maymays really cool too keep going  friend im really glad life ill never forget philosophical political discussions even though opinions different still respected eachother ps trash assassin go back support  beloved sunshine snow lungs below diamonds crown would never let drown keep promise made life harder stopped whining would never judge emotions judge hurt little fine really wish best find someone better someone whos pretty smart healthy selfless kind warm empathetic made life easier found happiness is calm peaceful extroverted loud uncontrollable im glad life really do really polar opposites  one classmates never knew feel way do hard it hard hide feelings hard stay awake night hard uncontrollable confidencehappiness episodes sorry let everyone down shall anymore