almost  months sober falling apart shit ton different traumas bubbled surface around two weeks ago people live with support system vacation five weeks kept contact much also nasty painful tooth infection triggering healthbased ocd existing like zombie barely move right now walk move slow motion feel like someone tried talk would stare energy open mouth know happening me know thinking killing  want it picky piece shit one way want go out oding doc cannot money think thing stopping right now life messy untangle fucked financially longterm much trauma feel close anyone cannot accomplish anything much physical pain smart feel much overwhelmed grief someone lost od year agoi hanging thread snap please someone help me please please someone need help please