hi everyone  year old male currently dealing depression majority life dealing ocdredflag mostly focused serious illness constant worrying put think serious deep depression emotion anymore nothing excites feel like existing got engaged  months nervous excitement emotion feel like emotion much anymore honestly scares me psychologists cbt never really helpedthinking might need go see psychiatrist feel like drowning cannot get awful feeling start going back work july  means  hour commute city one way question done help get depression anyone deals health redflag do feel like health redflag put state worried  months thinking skin cancer get biopsy mole feel like lump neck worse part one else feels went urgent care doc said nothing there keep making doc appointments thinking miss something trying save wedding spending money docs please help need help idk begin