feel like human being anyone else understandim    months feel like human being bipolar disorder depressive episodes lots anxiety life im failure careerim back living parents working part time im trouble coping ive nagging feeling always personlike im extremely subhuman im always shocked people like want around when do ive never romantic relationship like kid im talking early  years old would consciously think kids people human would hate it grew older felt deserve friends praise people ever always assumed anything earned life earned people feel sorry me im almost  ive never romantic relationship sort im terrified even know id go it im alone cant stand it hate muchi wish could kill myself anxiety selfhatred much see end it im never going able things want do age two feet steady job live parents ive never relationship etc feel like leach world see point alive people tell potential waste im basket case think id world favor killing myself