idea whats going on think deadthe night last posted here weird guy grape cocktail drugs night drank half it got tired feared throwing up went sleep thought maybe enough woke up liver felt uncomfortable live another day promised ex girlfriend last night watched lebron get defeated ex said would talk later message yesterday forgetting new gmail password signed out cutting contact her woke approximately  pm even sure alive dead one home someone always home  parents not got  never happens biggest fear know tried kill myself blacked threw someone cleaned up seen another human today know  real maybe kicked yet edit one knows think watched tv brother kinda nice mention anything thought last real words would everyone loses response happened championship game last night obviously woke up watched couple episodes unbreakable kimmy schmidt even wrote computer here giving everything brother except xbox  asked gifted good friend st birthday next month told cousin great dad baby boy love dearly wish could give important things to think well taken care already