im tiredfirst all english native language sorry im female late twenties ive never boyfriend never kissed anyone obviously never sex im ugly lonely living parents cant afford rent feel really miserable disgusting feel every person would throw disgust touching maybe even seeing me im diagnosed schizophrenia really hard cant believe myself feel like im alone even head everything unreal on cant stand it tried different meds quit them want fight anymore im tired world better without me everyone would happy im chicken kill myself guess ill let illness kill me maybe one day ill kill spontaneously know im little sad ill never loved ill never live someone love ill never feel safe home my parents really abusive cant anymore thank reading lt