cant anymoremy country  days nearly full quarantine feel like absolute shit feel like life either gonna end redflag finally snapping hurting someone love since start quarantine whole year same wake up finish homework attend classes go sleep cant keep this  ended good things looking better felt like mom finally settled new house suicidal thoughts finally going away  started pretty good grades classes hanging much friends quarantine hit schools shut down able see friends anymore able see dad every week first weeks bad kept going downhill though began feeling like wanted vomit throught day always felt sick slept much less used to felt like verge getting ill every day everything got worse there want speak friends fear lashing making feel bad hated mom hated school hated pets hated everything got better months mom wants move new city hundreds kilometres away live able see friends dad anyone lives every week like used to feel like nothing life anymore everything point end way dad already told paying current school year ends meaning even stay longer see friends now got told school apparently grades year count got told last part year grades midyear sucked means ill probably school much longer friends meaning able enjoy summers feel angry wanna anything anymore feel like running away throwing train track want live like anymore survive adulthood ill shittier life countrys economy shit