ive started seriously consider redflagthe last  hours much messed up redflag always something thought about never genuinely believed would it since one dodgy time younger right now trust myself first time  years seriously considered committing redflag life even bad compared anyone elses weight head cant get rid im dragged down would destroy little sister mam dad girlfriend going hard time right now know would destroy them thats always held back know even could stop right now could tonight really could probably even deserve posting here feel like imposter like theres people way way worse deserve help me apparently strong strong enough stop feeling way weak deal anyway know do know talk to maybe need someone say im ok im parasite maybe need anything all want ruin little sisters life want tragedy everyone talks sadly really know much longer ignore im feeling