hell wrong meso basically scrolling subreddit days now reading peoples posts one thing common mental illnesses  diagnosed anything yet somehow every time get angry upset mind resorts death redflag self harm idea whats happening many opportunities commit redflag missed them end concluded wouldnt nice family go losing one  sons chickened out instead thought stabbing knife left hand cant anymore self harmed nothing extreme like aforementioned knife hand mum noticed cuts sat talk feel awkward shyed away telling truth multiple times back main topic noticed most all posts subreddit made people legitimate reasons actions feel belong psychopathic making post ask help advice hell wrong fix messed brain side note  last night cried sleep brain made imagine seeing brother die slitting wrists bath tub horrible weird relationship brother bullies hate matter happens always best help him anyway rant over please help identify fuck wrong sorry making read lame attempt describing life