feel suffocatedfor little bit background im  almost  ive dealt reoccurring feelings dread suicidal thoughts perhaps depression since around age  dealing disordered eating thoughts since age  recently things happened family things completely control stressing parents sibling came unfortunate news therapy question longer health insurance even then see point seeking help overwhelming feelings absolute dread hated thought speaking others especially family friends makes feel panicked want drag people me enough theyre dealing plenty everything going on problems minute hardly seems matter anyone regardless seem help feel like something severely wrong me like im freak cant function properly unfortunately past ive spoken family treated normal clue whenever im stupid overthinking it bother using throwaway none know use reddit