sure think relief relief demand world puts people relief expectations someone try best good person try best cope stress end cycle ill never able break cycle never fold differ torment every day becomes much one talk to mean one people ive invested everything become another problem cant get of im good want best situations crack pressure cant take anymore want normal wish wasnt right wish negligent world around didnt see big pictures wish didnt understand much understanding torture never avoidable cant turn brain off cant fix world want wake tomorrow peace never happen one answer though world acts do depression much say ive done math ive seen variables set play get always be ill never understand got way why ill never understand point this point constant labor whats end goal someone wakes up works goes home purpose served whats actual purpose horrible existence means end threshold life holds back im smart mean smart yet am understanding chaos existence structured life part designing do say live like this cant force depression down tell everything okay im good start think look whats underneath all pain everyone hides games portray dont feel this dont hurt whose controller whose setting standard life peace always mind reality never let be