every time pain heart hope ill dieto intensely connected someone months go away taken away memories pierce mind every fucking day cant handle it much pain crying pain mind rejection betrayal hate every single moment im alive spent time her messaging eating together making plans talking fucking connection thought would die together turn butterfly went much poverty heroin addiction fights happiness love longer talks me broke up friends something happened left drunk took heroin found strangers respond messages want talk me void void heart id rather electricity thousands volts snapped testicles go this pure emotional torture reality cruel beg god kill please every time pain heart happy maybe maybe heart attack kill me plan yet method sure get idea