existing exhaustinghi there first time post something reddit im neither happy sad feeling im tired hopeless im dealing major depression since  im warrior  years stuck home several months internet place talk another people friends friends kicked chat groups think im annoying left behind cuz im toxic know always cheerful guy gang when cheerful guy cant laugh anymore becomes useless yeah throw away cuz cant laugh make laugh like before btw play video games im hardcore gamer fighting with depression valuable lesson video games thought me sometimes play game hours done quests unlock achievements feel like thats enough feel like play anymore game high rated metacritic  like continue like play another game even game library prefer play know still quests maybe watch best cg ending like continue tired think enough this feel life already battlefield fight depression protect myself government covid family make thing even worse fun perfect good enough problem want play anymore its enough