fifth vodka well reddit used king castle girl wanted marry wrapped up like good things  times  good true broke me belittled destroyed past month messy break up always manic depressive find little joy anything joy brightest star night said wanted children marriage around commitment i today said care live die relapsed sober months life really serve purpose anymore really cant find happiness anything life always felt meaningless i sit second guessing decision shooting heart  acp going midnight time  fear death fear loved ones told even were together still want whatever takes make happy staying life completely stated why fucking kill already tried failed like always failure never amount anything want degree astronomy wtf going fucking failure die ask today may seem sloppy ive posted here however quite impaired cant seem find reasons go plan already last words paper directed ex love nothing harsh blame memories good times reminding even though wants dead still support everything wants takes make happen her edit well odd strange turn events texted morning sorry bitch doesnt understand cant man get over explained things made believe hard eventually asked ever sees us said year likely told year ill probably loving someone else crush person her got mad said dont talk me bye said okay bye