ex committed redflagso wont short post serious comments only ex died three months ago well two weeks away four relationship complex best others names tattooed ourselves insanely close and probably person ive ever fully let life miss him im alone grieving im ex people tell worst things example wasnt fault glad happened someone else imagine would dealt better off think things add anger hurt ex addict alas too though im sober trouble bit sometimes good person someone loved quite dearly think people feel justified saying things past led redflag im say absolutely doesnt justify say think towards me also know played role hadnt broken really truly seven months seven months relapsed got girl let walk him beat down addicts go  living life hell understand did dont questions knew well knew me im given privilege able openly speak him hurt dont know ill stop grieving song comes ball eyes out pull letters soul burns course im recently married too husband though good man cant relate worst experience life thats coming woman whos beaten abused drugs hated herself survived suicidal tendencies raped seven wrecks lost mother age  pity party ive sufferings know pain cant seem deal death im alive theres good bad days comes waves realized lot things poorly treated  years afraid actually love stay  left always thought better found husband ex well let go always give freedom express free always said wouldnt settle less right wont downplay love husband either hes wonderful really is im thankful him think stems closeness shared ex life similar mine worlds mixed eerie ways last time saw hugged me said loved always husband messed would beat ass hurts over think mom telling mustnt wanted piece shit like broke upset was planned marry me think good times laughs talks know ive aged  years  months anyone experienced anything similar