want fucking hang sexualityi think every fucking day aspects life getting better improving except one always destroy biggest insecurity hate it feel fucking trapped feel numb dead inside hate fucking lesbian fucking mental illness fair get trapped shit able put cure it hear its bad thing thats fucking true even was allowed try get conversion therapy redflag euthanasia im staying closeted forever every since found felt nothing hatred depression teens years ripped away im different every fucking person cant normal life cant happy feel stuck live every aspect life work hobbies friends shit improve except this always going fucking plague me always going horrible shit forever able date like normal straight person able fucking hold hands girl able respected going seen fucking sex object people theyll sexualize me treated like normal fucking person want fucking suffocate myself want dead point living im going dragged mental deformity every fucking day