coping loss entire family feel nothing like nothing live either sign suicidal idealization risk itim mostly level stress trauma makes nonfunctional one bizarre life circumstances several people family egotistical sociopathic and possibly psychopathic drunks mother maybe cousins heavy drinkers met demise drunk driving family members vehicle separate occasions incidents far apart months find want around people much feel sad either normal feel much still grieving way lost entire family losing realize abusive fact too something wrong reaction despite dealing ptsd point sometimes too living relatives anymore im basically orphan think know grieve this feel like nothing proper grieve dealing trauma triggers better living ways avoid them fairly isolated