 days since almost itgot full ride scholarship college leave  days fairly well local stand comedy scene fucking miserable im  year old whos got ptsd really fucked emotional development young age way process emotion coping mechanism humor feel impulse make joke desperate need end it says explicit methods ill say every evening come close set up pull it cant form real emotional connection anybody feel like hollow shell human stay alive know logically ive got amazing shot ay something life feel like life worth living part wants go grin big fuck you life thats happened feel like ill always hollow clown ive never cry help guy guess thats changed since im posting here feel end rope guys feel like keeping going