lets real people stop giving shit weeks if ever even care allredflag deeply personal thing ive two acquaintances kill last two years hardly ever think them want kill myself im scared to dont want pain switch flipped brain brain wants die every day strong suicidal thoughts im running gas wish brain didnt want kill much ive literally beating shit lately close fist punching face ive lost control forehead knuckles covered visible bruises want stop pain ive saved lot money funeral costs years ive distancing loved ones want reduce footprint redflag inevitable hurt family wish could make look like accident would hurt think still care people want live im trying hard live im scared