i m on mobile so please excuse me i m also a first time poster on here female i quit a job i had for year last year in may of 0 i wa really good at that job one of the top people even if it wa just a warehouse job i wa a trainer i knew how to do everything and a lot wa expected of me everyday my bos wa incredibly verbally abusive to everyone i didn t realize it for a few year but my last two year being there she wa talking bad about everybody behind their back and just being a horrible human i finally quit one day when i got a different job with an old coworker i wa working that job for about month before i started to struggle going at first it wa because i felt inadequate and tired all the time i have a problem with being new at thing it progressed to a new coworker there wa starting to push my boundary a little bit older man telling me what to do and making me feel dumb which i know is my own issue i realize this whole post is my own issue but anyway i ended up leaving that job because every time i wa there i wa going to the bathroom to cry at least once and i couldn t make myself do it anymore and between that place and the job i m at now i had three other job one wa amazon delivery the other wa a daycare and the one before that wa just instacart i couldn t make enough money on instacart to even be a part time job it wa also putting stress on my car but i loved being able to work for myself basically and create my own hour i hated how the kid at daycare were treated and it disgusted me to the point i couldn t work there anymore and amazon hour were terrible and i wasn t getting home until 9 00 p m which doe not work for my year old son i finally got this job in january of this year and so far it ha been pretty good but i ve noticed that i m struggling to go a full 0 hour pay period in the past month i ve missed seven day which is a lot i suppose i just wake up in the morning and struggle to go and a voice in my head tell me that i don t need to and everything will be okay even if i decide not to go a long a the excuse i have is good enough and then i get so anxious about going back that i decide to stay home the next day and the day after that i m currently on my third day of being at home and even though i have a good excuse i m sure they don t believe me a little bit i don t know what s wrong with me i ve always been a hard worker and up until my breaking point last year i didn t know what this wa i still don t know what it is that i m feeling i m not feeling entitlement or anything like that i just feel empty and numb and what s the point of going i have to have a verbal argument with myself let me say that again with myself i literally have to talk out loud to myself and argue that i have a house payment i have bill i have a kid who also ha bill what is wrong with me my family on both side ha history of depression and i have unprofessionally diagnosed adhd my mom ha anxiety disorder last year when i quit my job i left because of the work environment and how bad it wa and now my new job it s more laid back but it s the same kind of job nd i m constantly worried i m being talked about and that i m not good enough to be there my anxiety from the other job is transferring here for no reason everyone is incredibly nice i m also struggling internally because i really want to go to college and get a better kind of job but i don t know what i want to do yet i m feeling overwhelmed by it because i m a single mom and i don t know how i m going to be able to go to school and work at the same time so i guess for the past couple month i ve also felt pretty trapped feeling like i ll never work for myself and i ll never get a good job because i can t figure my life out but ha anyone experienced this kind of feeling at my age i don t know if it s burnout or if it s related to my cptsd that i have from a physically abusive relationship from year ago i ve tried looking it up on google i ve tried listening to meditational motivation stuff and anyone give me help in the form of advice i don t want to be like this forever i know it s understandable to not want to work but i should be at work literally right now and instead i m in bed speak texting this because i know something s wrong with me i can t afford to do anything therapy right now so just any insight or story from when you were my age and you broke a little bit i m just scared and tired and i want to kick myself in the as but i don t know how and i don t have the energy too i really don t need to hear anything negative about me because i can tell you i m already thinking it i just feel like a waste of space who can t get her s together that my son deserves a better parent than me