fuck it im going styleim going get sad depressed this fuck that tried fucking hardest god damn best im sexiest bloke block neither ugliest longshot knows maybe fucking am gives shit anyway im reserved im holed guy go everyday million things skydive scuba dive iceskate rollerblade etc everything anything know what matter fucking truth circumstances raised view world literally put almost impossible state find someone love someone loves back ive lived fucking europe south america north america single fucking real friend hear that fucking one im nice guy im guy pulls freeways help you im guy gives hitchhiker rides im guy whos always everyone ready listen help im guy im invisible amazing guy guy everyone loved guy everyone helped by guy nobody remembers fuck it cares sad thing matter fucking reality idontfitin mind tried tried good time earth fun parts unluckily life whopping cushion negative even bad life  harsh  negative know what im done negative im going go always wanted without fucking experience want it im going go live wild yeah im probably going freeze death im probably going starve im probably die disease gives fucking crap im fucking tired living people connection to nobody understand like nineteen never single fucking friend entire life fucking dont im outgoing guy public guy everyone asks take pictures of guy helps dude loading truck guy hears people asking question gives answer im guy nobody wants accept me agnostic extreme sport computer gaming nerd scifi fantasy chick flick lover musical metal rap loving anime cooking reading quadlingual multicultured mixed bad dating saying right sexy things coming friend hah fuck me thats snippet try using say im sure thousands people like you fuck you lived europe two years lived brazil year lived alaska year joined military year fucking think so anyways got chest selling truck quitting job giving sister shit heading mountains want find nice  canyon make leap wrote guys i bend right leg lean forward  breeze weak sunny yet chilly april day third month free today think almost moment  think free longer concerned food longer concerned bills impressions dates finally true myself want nothing return came finally peace death  nicholas diary page  p  edit peace fuck out im shutting last time time roll ball shit