posted times different names really know why guess hoping feel better shouting ether know anything one see it find oddly comforting spent long locked box know anything else anymore knowing one listening one help comfort almost but always known would end up even kid would cry sleep knowing one day would make everyone everything around miserable lo behold am married like idiot wanted hope know wanted try fight cosmic destiny felt waiting me maybe wrong maybe could happy maybe could beautiful wife child am married  years made woman love miserable got beautiful daughter live father would someone supposed love people selfish enough get involved lives going sort emotional behavioral issues daughter mental illness runs family greedy walk away let live life know me wife choose marry me suffer it waste space time lives much coward end teenager late knew would never happy make anyone happy since ten twenty years later proof still plain day could stop trying live normal life could accept what deserved know never see this sorry truly sorry horrible luck meeting me nothing could ever make either you hope forget one day get lost too okay