venting rotten putrid feelings haul around every dayive putting years lately feel like wasted time think  years someone asking feel throwing pills would fix problems have try hard fit  get good job well school exist outside fucking institution im beginning think past attempts one step success reason life gone shit meant around long know exactly anymore every day fucking struggle anymore time drive vividly fucking dream throwing car semi cross street slow hopes someone make decision me cant bear shit anymore im pussy gone how affect others fucking pathetic i