whole life suffered  never girlfriend grew far poor money job barely friends hate lot get sad night eat lot day know problem is feel unwelcome world hate school god hate school one school year left graduate know going do never job before scared get one drivers license permit scared drive doctor  mental health before usually depression hits older people me upset myself maybe born sad made fun of bullied physically mentally various reasons obesity special ed friends never girlfriend hate myself family care anyone else ready die yet alot things life die wtf still here