life worthlessi done everything can best could demons chase nightmares back head stuff dark rooms mind darkness bleeds corrupts hearti know people good see beauty everyone opens heart before friend family partnerthere beauty all pour love sacrifice heart life give everything see others built up commit giving  income helping building others carry s car time homeless almost always stop people walking side highway could tell names stories several homeless city used spend time sitting them giving hugs rides love cherish othersand alone always been lastest abandonment damn fault too fell love married woman would have except marriage one neglected abused took mantle loving gorgeous depths heart facade came down victim ran back abuser one mebut person actually see me love me leave died  short yearsthe relationship before fell apart emotionally abusive could wrong would shift blame use guilt avoid admit fault anything serious finally confronted her lefti perfect person hold doubt ball wax selfsacrificing otherfocused see take responsibility failures absolutely give life always bettering myself sole ambition best man best potential husband woman assumed walking earth waiting find heryet efforts naught search search put many ways yet connections few ones form fade away quite rapidlymy one fear unlovable walking dark streets mind led two previous attempts life difference now live city could shot walking street nightnow spend  hours day trying find something do someone talk to still searching someone love desolate worthless soul heart yearns leave dark streets mind take last walk would ever walk darkness take long nowi want die want pain end walk path destruction again