unfortunately one people thinks death lot weather hands multiple instances varying degrees possibility matter attached detached reality are come find feeling numb perhaps merely trying trick thinking ameither way known afraid deathhowever id like think stronger suicide like think hold world refuse allow kill me truly wants dead dirty work itself save ultimatum actual emergency either save another save completely bleak situation yet time like hypocrite say fully peace unknown death unknown life shakes core still young getting sense world learned far scared hopefully shocked amazed frightened beginning see small everything yet large things appear even little thoughtless actions massive consequences present unknowable future know doexcept always done run hide watch distance talking ghost people never met notes screens light half time freeze that sit hole survive spectate never truly live interact tired know blame world given others actions much many things could done differently honest response scaredand know be want kill sure live