pent emotions would always creeping back mind could stand anymore feeling selfhatred something many people experienced lives belittle selfworth believe deserve life given failed meet expectations people around that ran away much easier confronting problems times see value whatever reason thus begin think burden society people care about this start convince maybe existing would better cannot get unhealthy selfdestructive mindset always look floor walking cannot look people eye always negative perceptions dictate think people say negative things me important thing never felt meaning value joy life speech school exam called life its redflag depression