fianc died  nothing left live forthe love life died  stupid pointless terminal illness took life away long took life away  angry hurts much want done now literally nothing left live for nothing apart silence pain dreaming way another every time try sleep nothing helps nothing ever will never written reddit life  even know works really  anyone else talk to family friends happy loved bubbles husbands babies right now awful is kinda hate happy know he want die that dead would would want irrelevant want die want stop