made attempt yesterday backstory im going completely honest guys life shit show  guys lost fulltime job drugs xanax cocaine lots overthecounter sleeping medications thought would help get moving parents place twin brother still resides one twin thats always problem child never easy feat me first attempt  seen attention seeking come polish family strict comes respect quite little asshole say i honestly still think am digress  days ago took probably around mg quetiapine passed around  minutes felt great like warm embrace unconsciousness enveloping hopefully permanent darkness wake emergency room barely conscious  clock murmured state drowsiness thats notice paramedic sitting right next saying yes  clock  days picked shocked also disheartened finally thought built courage failed again stuck emergency tent couldnt even get body felt like hit car today rd day city  hour hold form allowed leave hospital really want get actually succeed something give parents one straight gifted son look much disappear still manage get  mg seroquel  hour hold want try want succeed know selfish felt right felt peaceful tranquil thank anybody reading words would end saying dont think love sadly cant think thats alright