im feeling year chronic depressedalready year feel nothing hatred sadness within fueling thoughts negativity ive hope ill ever trust people feel safe loved healed feel happy never person cry year feel like im constantly holding back could cry every day wanted command feel fucked head desire destroy vanish like greatness gone ive felt fucked often became chronic undeniable feel need someone fix make shit decisions professional would expensive right cant put real person shit im always keep evolving often leads going days denying insanity dont know do feel constantly outcast thoughts impossible fit in im either foggy fucked negative spiral inside head ive short outburst happiness hour drains energy