hate morningsi used love mornings long long time ago and years first seconds waking still bliss yet knowing am am soon awarness comes poweful dull pain around chest everything feels heavy feel sick much resistance anything physically hurts stand up try put autopilot wash face good routine drink glass water too still look forward coffee morning im keeping everything minimum damn hard pointless dress theres point feel much energy could anything get short bursts motivation everything forced feel sick see sunny outaide said would go jogging start crying crying  hours now cant stop type tears cry let something cheat pure pain hopelessness venting friend woke stupid complaints know say still thinks allright good person sometimes get angry even people care even though main problems based hard time beong comfortable around people cant enjoy life anymore hurts much cant even enjoy present focus now no know naturemovie plothaving tea beautiful hate cant part it cant turn music chill hurts never fully relaxed sometimes put back little get hopes living loving actually miss something never see future without it see point anything except making otherslife easier fault im like this still hurts like hell want anymore feel trapped false hope theres nothing look forward im much pain could tropical island still feel like this want anywhere actually cant think fulfilling future someone like anymore im passing by