help online friendi cant crosspost ill put here really want know once thanks reading schizophrenic friend ive known years online diagnosed paranoid schizophrenia seems get worse years suicidal least  attempts past  years likes game lot one favorite fandoms touhou fandom believes dies would reincarnated gensokyo the main setting touhou project ive working mom years weve gotten help therapists many antidepressants persistent insisting put go messy way honestly know do long im shitty college freshman friends willing help antics goes causes much drama decide keep unblocked feel massive amount guilt single mother do