friend saved life know doi fully prepared end today pills ready laid got back knew today going last day id planning month knew mum brother would out weirdly settled knowledge one thing actually control happening finished school day began walk back home usual walked past group people considered friends go home way me one said anything walked bit behind me turned usual point halfway road heard running feet behind me friend ran entire way back around corner road nearly asthma attack it asked important looking back fucking rude her done ask needed anything looked really recently worried apparently looked even lower usual today know was something stopped me still want live state cant see getting better cant bring now know do thought control least cant even control that