verge redflag head tension degrading brain helpi never used reddit before since good reputation helping people thought would good idea ask help here question is head tension forehead life adhd symptoms comes depression social isolation etc head tension let focus like something stick burried head cant think flicker memory constantly forget im current moment everything exists depersonalization derealization slowly forgetting language words grammar syntax school years university though dropout social anxiety seems memory flicker strong feel dizzy also maybe general anxiety idk asked technical questions need math years getting slower slower mentally speaking even stuff love like music make music many times im composing cant focus music cant almost see screen hear see blurry makes sense anything tbh cant see hear things much second passes forget even hard sometimes listen people read even forget midway amwhats happening im reading get stuck zoning everything becomes like blurry something head constantly hurts head tension angry showing face young supposedly normal many thoughts could focus normal person adhd would could now cant even simplest tasks getting worse constantly instructive thoughts filling mind brim like making excuses work legit feel odd wtf happening cant grasp myself maybe dumb maybe cant grasp reality maybe stupid child raised properly anyways good example instrusive thoughts lately mind completely empty meditating even easy thoughts cant even write make music like used this drop college this failed two semesters three really like cant grasp brain literally rotting shrinking bit backstory went school like normal kid always alone friends till highschool began create social skills always needed help mother study resulted lot fights house alone countless hours everyday trying learn something able so still remember rustle trees room young almost childhood life was depressed school depressed home always since young constantly depressed seen neurologist said might adhd paid attention nothing done it kept like this always getting worse highschool think bit before head tension started think maybe middle school attention people saying started degrading forgetting grammar language spanish english horribly depressed worsen head really hurt memory got worse well everything forward recent past went psychiatris diagnosing adhd july went well got perfect score adderall really helped lot went university again slowly effects adderall started drop always was filled anxiety classrooms people time started panic attacks anxiety got worse worse throughout years tried manage well university kept getting panic attacks believing might trauma school years tried kill dorms twice went psychiatric hospital twice help all also antidepressants shit second time tried kill went university try more got think panic attack strong move all shaking whole body tense dizzy frozen got strong point move almost talk felt like loosing conciousnes happened hometown house whole week trembling able talk properly think properly mental breakdowns getting insane quit university still keeps head tension mind dying shaking anymore walk still panic attacks yes intense one made stop moving im verge redflag again asking reddit help wtf this