ive obsessed bedrooms window i live th floorever since moved new apartment ive obsessed afraid time bedrooms window point think healthy drives suicidal thoughts im afraid heights panic every single time get close window go balcony every time somebody passes close one two body starts erratically move feel person may slide trip fall abyss every single time look mind fills images falling easy would die jump im writing last night really vivid nightmare cant stop thinking damn window sort creepy weird factor screams danger also calling get closer take look down prevent escalating actual suicidal thoughts