give upmy life fallen shit past months ive typically antisocial introverted began making effort get know people more partially succeeded feel guise fake persona someone far actually feel ive lost actual personality trying make friends shit well  managed fall love one confessing sent letter essentially detailing friends felt obliged give letter solely circumstances hit pretty fucking hard  big enough part life get away depression redflag first time feel like ive dug hole get of redflag honestly looks like better option continuing live shit ive flung im tired living say least