never gets better becomes manageable time maybe always there cannot keep deal lows nobody fucking understands painful is absolutely miserable am feel like literally ripping skin screaming guts out yesterday mental breakdown am shaved entire head hair off cringe every time see bald head mirror want punch reflection feel like ugly bitch angry every day become insufferable drive people away intense resting bitch face look pissed  time now am know damn angry what unhappiness sadness turned anger rage years sorry everyone rude angry towards work hurts much promise sorry boss please fire even though actually want here want angry tho know wrong me know making miserable sorry energy put smile friendly agreeable cannot anymore know putting around someone heavy aura radiating much toxic energyim sorry that every day leave work feeling like shit even know friends support system sick myself sick coming home apartment nobody nothing come home to get work speak words loud next day nobody talk to wish intrusive thoughts would stop ugly getting older look you never beautiful begin with care nobody cares you here end it point tomorrow like today always is always is hot hell know much worse hell be dragging day suffering emotional psychological pain becomes so physical feels like worst torture imaginable me gets worse worse worse