tired constant failureyesterday mom asked keep going looked normal emotionless face shrugged thinks therapy dont heart tell therapy doesnt help me ive started cutting cope constant failure tbh since early high school cant talk due culture male cant tell ive found comfort alcohol im trying keep binging becoming harder drink bottle medication im tired always failing ive worked hard many years sacrificed much slip fingers like water last several years comprised financial hardship rejections med schools deaths breakup literally havent even taken time mourn lossesfailures dont know mourn feel nothing void space nothing exists yet widens everyday consumes me think loneliness whats getting most relationship lasted months im grateful first experience healthy left craving affection dont get much attention women eat away me feeds suicidal thoughts feelings inadequacy want end cant find ways end peacefully cant share thoughts anyone since friends run ignore acknowledging others feel im failure worthless perhaps better let void consume me