im fucking close ending allwhen eminem said when im gone carry mourn wish upon friends really considering redflag point hate life really see point it like peace life always depression even anti depressants really depression fucking tired everyday fake happy mom dad sister school counselors friends hurting inside much want pain end fucking  ed fucking school front friends teacher staff taken restraints hospital hours upon end think that probably fucking helps shit make even suicidal permanent way end pain death cutting temporary solution literally fucking anyone sees tell someone trying get help good intentions always end going hospital want peace never ending depression tried hang twice stopped parents came home times tried od adderall adhd meds take enough fucking sick tired world become want end life really see future wretched thing call world like fucking real want emotional peace once