failed everyone including methis little something bothered time goes on kid always seen poster child basketball family everyone knew good would practice almost everyday dreams dominating day day out even ended team captain senior year went school  kids good reputation ball changed first week season ended terrible even though would good practice coach would never put games order make time favorites would openly challenged outplay never got spot sophomore junior year  first senior game im sucking geez fun ended getting benched one younger guys later week sustained horrible nerve damage left arm would leave basically handicapped  months still bothers then know let peers loved ones complete bummer lost confidence turn dont even know do dont know am feel like never got chance prove worth everyday back mind if totally let parents even though never showed games always trying best could thought would good enough turn ended nothing im rejected almost everyone know fuck am kids blame feels like distanced themselves feel like reject every week go sports medicine try recover left season even getting green light atleast sit bench without warmups never happened never respected loved felt alone people poke fun couldnt even move arm beginning first month arm sleeve would fucking flip around like noodle numbing traumatizing nerves would tingle pain fucking hated every second it let everyone im worth shit im failure fucking failed even though put years years dedication matter anyone told kept going nothing nothing im nobody highschool dont even want talk anyone dont feel like anyone talk this feel like would make things worse wasted fucking life time fucking game want help advice 