this ha ruined my life the only thing keeping me from killing myself is my baby boy his mother manipulates me she s emotionally abusive and i don t know how to stand up to her i can t i m so afraid she ll take him away from me i can t keep doing this and i can t kill myself but i think i will i think he ll be better off without me i m a mess my finance are a mess my emotion i can barely take care of my own thing i m in so much turmoil i constantly fantasize about offing myself and every few day i sit there with a gun to my head and i just can t do it i think of my boy and then the pain is worse fyi we were engaged and shit fell apart for good last year october we still live together because we have a lease on a house and housing right now is a bitch nothing available so i m trapped here