deserve want sympathy tell dowhite male parents always poor fuck work every possession have senior year highschool ive going local community college duel enrolled since  payed classes myself suffered anxiety bullying family church  got rid summer  went taiwan mission trip went real tough shit leaders challenging integrity upon returning several symptoms ptsd tormented memories finally learned let go last summer moved on problem is still get anxiety attacks lot lead contemplate thoughts redflag attempt harm myself anything make stop trouble breathing sometimes shake completely unmotivated worst though chest throbs im laying floor tears like  minutes ago happens dumbest reasons im pretty tough logical entj big acting emotion things like fights parents want kick cause enough home cause im always busting ass school really hurts me misunderstandings people things able get instead cause hours suicidal anxiety even admit suicidal took  question test friend psych school evaluate me results test said suicidal ideation levels were remarkable depression anxiety im always like this bouts doctor gave stuff work  months later prescribed something else get cause healthcare savings card empty makes really upset could prevented money get medicine could talk forever probably broken people trying help broken people