past year rough high functioning autistic large circle friends due social redflagit mostly me mom dad girlfriend  yearsmy mom passed away cancer back april losing rough fathertoday particularly awful interaction customer job caused redflag attack boss felt bad gave rest afternoon off arrived home  hours earlier expected walked girlfriend sex fatheri completely lost verbally threatened attack them called police citation appear court making threatsi feel betrayed two people left worldi alone right want cut throat bleed out need someone talk please need friend right ever nothing nobody crisis right need someone talk to