planning killing tonightim leaving place put final thoughts ive enjoyed little life im  soon turning  periods life look back fondly on im currently attending college find miserable degree hate father insists get spent high school years either alone working helping mother grandfather dont regret helping mother regret everything else mother alcoholic shes better past living complete nightmare  sisters one never close too another dont speak anymore went away college made clear never returning here dont blame her resent leaving younger brother alone deal mother everything else bullied badly school never received help im surprised didnt kill back then thinking wish had better me theres light end tunnel im going take fathers heart diabetes medication tonight hope never wake up thank read this