nthe edge right stepped backi tried put misery days ago stopped myself problem nothing really changed life static due early life crisis see always known wanted writer since childhood ever saw doing th grade entered essay contest overheard head contest talking essay words  never good writer said made eye contact lost words moment pretended hear anything next day depressed ever been lost faith skill dream even muster strength go school  years later im drop idea want life im angry everyone everything try write im happy anything come with everyone life thinks graduated working getting community college classes want filmmaker tried make short films shit unwatchable truth walk around pretending homeless sleep park benchs tried truly think im going spend rest life like this moment truth realised really want die problem know do cant go back school cant write confidence films trash also late tell friends truth without losing them tldr genuinely lost life redflag answer know is