im  kill myselfim  year old male ive pretty much fucked life already see anyway im going successful adult little situation well im pretty much done school im technically drop state  drop gone school  months school really done anything it really friends talk anyone all days sit room listen music read philosophical books play video games also really like mathematics taught calculus anyone knowledgeable math limits derivatives integration started teach differential equations going series little later master differential equations seems lot integration used solve differential equations want forget integrate genuinely like learning figure since im probably going college higher education institution probably teach stuff now also hear einstein mastered differential integral calculus  even though im  told myself hey want that saying im genius anything honestly anyone iq least  stuff anyways really hate school though hate way everything enforced stuff useless get wrong think genuine learning going public schools like set it cant stand it need independent study prefer teach someone teach me know probably sound like typical winy angsty teen truth told probably am expressing rarely get to said before really nothing day life job drivers license actually apply job back never go back me probably low gpa is jobs looked  honestly fucking ridiculous im even old enough work places like family dollar walmart  seeing lot internet news prom prom stories im going junior prom one knows exist anymore besides really fucking ugly like strikingly ugly hate myself even still school girl would want go prom me gross disgusting makes want die most hate myself hate much social anxiety public hideous face made fun kid ugly words never gone away ugly smelly stupid future ill living parents basement fucked up fucked bad low life piece shit lonely feel lonely never go anywhere talk anyone eating away hate myself keep alive want die worst part is know situation fault too really thought maybe hanging overdosing maybe even jumping bridge downtown live