suicidal thoughts life assume like many people never really talked anybody it gave hints years brushed long time thought normal never actually attempted anything planned lot started making draft suicide letters promised would actually anything finished them always broke wrote never got finished happened middle school high school last term college get bachelors gotten lot better years feel slipping last year so spent last couple days disassociating bed sure everyone thinks flake guess am trying make sure slip back use be like time deal this last freaking term feel like getting closer closer edge meltdown know want die feel lost right death sounds heartbreakingly sweet relapsing