may may heard term people friends easy time anyone else with recovering bout septic arthritis know cool either let us say requires surgery fairly long hospital stay home iv drugs none fun going this course outpouring facebook well wishes get wells people mostly away close friends use term close loosely hospital mom flies yes serious anyone care wager amount friends came see me one one grateful came huge gut punch one else even made effort made really rethink allowed friendships be allowed people take granted equivalent ramen noodles let explaini hate ramen noodles buy case throw cupboard case emergency ie money nothing else eat zombie apocalypse sort thing allowed ramen noodles emergency friend always available need otherwise forget something better available find fishing invites things still left always outskirts asking myself wrong me wanted people family care me care much people give crap me answer know stop trying get used fact may never find gang ever really belong anywhere think acceptance heartbreaking sure come back it life alone waste life lonely seems pretty soul crushing fair weather friends next time wind changesjust let go lot less painful try find way least content company cannot manage happiness fair weather friends