towards the end of my senior year of high school my anxiety wa at an all time high i d cry in the parking lot having a panic attack nearly every day and i missed sm school because of it luckily my school teacher and counselor were very understanding and helped me get through it and graduate but i wa very close to not being able to walk due to my attendance i got through it though and over the summer that extreme anxiously gradually faded out surprisingly when i entered college my anxiety wa probably the best it s ever been to be specific my social anxiety wa nearly non detectable i still had some general anxiety about school and stuff but tbh even that wa barely there most of the time i kinda developed a carefree mindset where i stopped being so anxious about being a people pleaser and instead wa just myself i knew i wa a good person i m funny loyal adventurous and a good friend so if anyone didn t like me that s their loss tbh i felt this way in high school too at least in term of knowing my worth the only difference is i wa to afraid to show myself to people unfortunately though i think this carefree attitude went a bit too far a it started affecting my academic i have adhd too so that made me struggle with stuff ofc but i think that my new stance on my life kinda made everything even worse academically i dropped out after one semester i didn t want to but i knew i had to since i wa basically not trying at school didn t like my major horrible grade i wouldn t be able to afford it if my scholarship wa taken away due to my grade if i stayed i d probably be put on academic probation for a major i don t even care about anymore there s probably many more reason that led to me dropping out but moral of the story is i m not in school anymore the past two month i ve just been at home honestly doing nothing i enrolled in community college but i attended two class and then on the day of my rd class i got extremely depressed probably the most depressed i ve ever been i couldn t eat sleep or even drink water obviously i couldn t get outta the house and go to my class if i couldn t even do basic thing like that so my mom made me drop out she wa actually the one who kinda forced me into it i wanted to just take a break from school for a semester and work for a bit so i could figure out what i wanted but she wa adamant about going to community college since leaving community college i ve been trying to get my shit together i still have bad day depression wise but it s gotten better i started seeing my therapist again and i m also getting tested by a neurologist to see if i have anything else going on outside of my adhd anxiety and depression a my therapist and psychiatrist think i might have some processing disorder once i see the neurologist i think i wan na get a job again my old job wa great a it wa a small business so they were le strict i m chronically late by at least 0 minute but my old bos wa understanding about that in a way i feel like larger business wouldn t be anyways back to my point today i got a sudden wave of anxiety i haven t felt since probably my first day of college tbh since i haven t experienced it in a while i forgot how debilitating and overwhelming it is idk how to deal with it now