honestly put existenceso many things happened life lately pushes ending all drug addict sister abused parents hospital baby severe health issues due drug use pushed mom finals mediocre grades im years graduating even though graduated year financial debt got mostly racked school letting boyfriend take advantage me im still abusive relationship  years ago recent ex take seriously abusive relationship opened old wounds fell madly love someone terrible again broke thinking going life without makes feel alone honestly life gotten better ive gotten used disappointment grief loneliness im think im finally going kill end year