im dying hour  please help life storyhello people im reaching anybody help way can please bare naivety usually reach people all let alone online ampxb try summarise hellishness life short simple possible hopefully relate extent help me im  year old guy depression anxiety stress  diagnosed extremely severe mental illness started father committed redflag  years ago continuously gotten worse past  years left school  full time graphic designer great stayed job year  months ago attempted redflag abandoned job incredibly lucky age boss treated better anyone else life past  months ive absolutely nothing life waking find listening sad music annoyed nothing do simultaneously lacking motivation get new job meet new people im currently medication anxiety depression enough always find trance lost suicidal thoughts always wonder would like side better worse nothing everything extremely luring im naturally curious person kinds ideas take drugs like lsd mdma pretty often now take hopes one time may find see dad went years maybe find reason live ive heard people profound experiences finding need life theyre drugs right currently  mdma pills plan take finally guts take life plunge death shopping centre carpark  mainly hoping drugs give guts jump is somebody please help me currently live state fearing living dying feel like time running out ampxb