redflag planon throwaway account cause cant find post main acc probably time ill post anyway could write whole books worth stuff theres really anytime explain ive set certain intervals time likely end attempting redflag im planning day day im giving  years see kind change im pretty sure ill kick bucket cant explain feel life isnt inherently bad im good health mentally cant find anything good myself beat constantly one world cares all im saying cause refuse open anyone longer expect anything good bad happen go motions dont tell anyone feel hold everything hate appearing weak even though im trying hard man try hard stoic void feelings eats soul none friends give shit me dont know anyone irl know one girl every time tried talk gave advice always hear understand itll get better basically means nothing boyfriend sometimes take kind meaningful interaction someone shes normally phone im blabbering idiot nothing offer wish instead understand someone would would instead try lend hand meet me talk me ask day nope redflag becomes tantalizing world disconnected shit im caught middle one would care left it people never say anything face moment die theyll go oh great guy sycophants post social media look like good person im invisible everyone thats price pay existing really want get better somewhere me light follow really hope doesnt come taking well might