understand difficult just breathe okay however am past traumas attack endlessly ruins present hence making want look forward future much write know start sure saying anonymously going help all feel empty writing this hope wake tomorrow want end  tired want live anymore neither want kill myself tried  times already gave failed  fucking times loljokes me know tell everything joined community know fucked up sharing family make fuckin difference many times tried hinting them hey fucked up want wake tomorrow way family help me brushed off lol family depression even real devils workthat makes work short know putting effort waste anyone reads post let know okay share reasons made way today bother please use harsh commands civil get straight thanks hard accept whatever life