would lot easier give upall push ive pushing pushing keep trying find happiness gets shut every time thing makes happiest im helping people see joy eyes anything big small take care myself too passions hobbies goals calligraphy love music great passion coding im good it still pushing nothing brings happiness much weight me actions directed towards helping people losing luster get anything anymore things others see joy get rush it means stop finding ways make people happy find way make happy want redflag easier finally look interests interest what ignore it supposed change wrong according society looking interests then cant selfish killing selfish cant it everyone selfish everyone looks themselves best interests mind best path end it care anyone else thinks justified mind justify anyone else get joy anything im supposed look me like everyone else wrong seriously tell me wrong makes sense something makes sense it would destroy people yes theyve done me too care cop out cowardly move no tell owe others it owe anyone anything besides living owe people way live