need help dealing acquaintance canadian input especially usefulhi guys first post sorry longer whats usually posted here guy know not closely live far away cannot help directly recently failed first semester college too late get courses currently debt always poor academic standing every subject seems academia in subjects question also likely chronic illnesshttpsenwikipediaorgwikiankylosing_spondylitis already appeared close family members limiting comes work trades ive proposed get diagnosis doctor least potentially get disability ontario plan cpp however hard motivate even this family members live like permanently afraid becoming like this would bad selfesteem however due illness getting wellpaid jobs in trades keeping  years really hard also asthma keeps joining army know himself im bit stumped too ideas driving basic office work precise trade require much hard physical labor like watchmakers decades back ideasresources wellappreciated one family member grandfather supports lended college money told failing semester yet somewhat suicidal though thankfully extremely committed yet usual kinds cases ashamed finds existence useless thinks would useful society family dead constantly miserable mood wakes morning feeling hit car stuff think greatest longterm cure would fulfilling job ideas useful temporarily longer term