normal think killing every single day rightread bottom bold quick dirty  year old senior since  first got idea redflag was ever since then thoughts become frequent concentrated literally think redflag every single night heres catch there literally plausible reason want kill myself love life love parents good home were rich best give want which much never abused hurt raped immense emotional trauma stemming death family anything else running well music passion love death really since april year many friends moment  good friends stay contact with  others know well drifted away whatever reason go online school hard concentrate class still hard work home least spend afternoon one subject ive done lot openminded unbiased research found  adhd im th grade even understand algebra like trying httpwwwkhanacademyorgalgebra learned some know im plain stupid i actually think intelligent thats pretty petty shallow say yourself hate constant self awareness judgement awareness actions world buddhists see enlightening see curse see post im bad english either frustrating difficult though sitting mind race billion miles per hour im trying better myself actually like math too online school main reason many friends love talking people friends them antisocial disorder know majority people feel way do constant lingering feeling themselves worst night online school theres really set time work led many many nights thinking redflag hours hours know sleep look clock see am whatever night know normal go sleep am wake pm cant stop thinking it httpwwwyoutubecomwatchvwliumkgcoc  the time day reference  or  am would  or  minutes  am song speaks quite lot gosh think ive ever cried much first time ive ever wrote out know whole but kill everyone love sad  try telling head months aint listening want fucking die hate feeling want win might one day though so reasons left feeling perpetual looming feeling desperation only one brainmind broken im right something working head cant stand it