closer everi always considered strong person face difficulties matter damage well used like this armor shredding every time endure problems think much left ill start several years ago going puberty tough times know suddenly family fell apart noticed snowballing sometimes care much dad pissed moms behavior mom pissed dadss behavior im middle it living hell halfyear witnessing conflicts almost everyday bullied  back then home school carried on resolved eventually got lessons it back forth accidents elaborate further maybe helped bit least realized hygiene problems started working it days passed slowly recovered went gym which almost useless eating disorder life stable fast forward present me dad started business small pub discovered reddit found rpornfree rfasting really believed success business started roughly borrowed money stay alive months peak life eating healthy got job stopped watching fucking porn i discovered  years ago lost weight  kg month nice huh fat ugly kid finally transforming adult thought same time cruel problems business discovered another one disappointment often believe lovely words see perspective motivates you time even sub typing this lost almost before pornfree streak gone healthy eating gone positivity gone started skipping classes done before quality life moment worst could imagine barely money buy food meaning im eating cheap junk shit damn eaten days mention internet im debt phone barely working sometimes wonder possible according condition worst problem debt business business generate profit lesion early money pay rent bills dad borrowed money sold car need pay rent tomorrow about  may say someones living conditions worse mine  that disagree want hear words wisdom support people like life need bump smm buy ads make creative posts motivation life things thanks give cant take anything enthusiastic person want see response actions thats enough get even tommorow for me ill start last attempts rescue business grave hope may succeed may not lets hope end bottom ocean thanks hearing out good day