got broken withso traveled  miles pandemic meet guy thought loved me get trapped extra week wildfires break phone day got home sleeping airport floor spent much money get broken with said loved told said want make trip awkward also best friend going rough time also hate myself lol am ready over genuinely tried tell three friends told im well friend once told  redflag scale listened think understood serious ending it ready want anymore someone suggests ill feel better days im feeling way big break  ive depressed occasionally suicidal almost decade im tired fighting think time