told boyfriend ive thinking killing myself said im sorry left workif care does ive stopping guilt loved ones look me finally free end pain edit know loves aware depression two years ive never felt suicidal now really scary think anymore sometimes think gets sick consoling knows issue chronic way am im feeling sad again ill cry pass much different ive never cried wolf redflag seriously think need help week make through impulses strong one person hoping reach indifferent tried make clear serious is different time walked arms want alive would feel content dead forever like always people around keeping losing would devastating them hate every second it live miserably go bed depressed wake anxious flashbacks inconvenient times point prioritize pain theirs everyone could understand let go would much happier fuck