sick jokepreviously going kill  feb manage survive point occupy several days yeh maybe im far like around  years then thinking new semester starts st april might well kill day background recently knew well dugged past  classify mentally weak physically weak happened got genes like parents  mom died redflag  crippling depression giving birth me also diagnosed something called baby blues  father cheated mom knew something wrong mom make things funny year mom passed away live together house living room hahaha first thought cheated girlfriend bestfriend last semester hs one month prior national exam already bad enough recently september last year ex left ex depression recently learned this done myself like legit im tired keep feeling dejected time goes on bestfriends my family heck even father say it pass there people went worse yeh ill keep facade nothing happens everyone else community im counting days end i seek help counseling instesively within economic capability yeah somehow still see worth keep moving forward who myself judging experience ending still looks better option