still depressed hard recount deep lows got point would lay bed eat weight eventually differentiation tasks like eating jogging watching tv became laying bed anything else not laying beddid care dressed shoes drove around goal paid bill pure apathy care was long dying oknothing made upset getting point care hair looked awful killing it care looking bad comfortable feel nothing worries would ever bother leavebut end year looked mirror  lbs overweight friends hobbies aspirations nothing recognize myself entire year felt like one long day laying bed anybody get point things could say none matters anymore