i ve been lying for year about how i feel right to people face i feel like i can never be the real me a it would burden other people with my feeling i always sabotage myself by keeping to myself until i break and hurt the other people around me but i just can t get out of the hole i ve dug for myself i m completely burnt out and don t have any motivation to do anything anymore i mean my day literally consist of listening to music and not much else because it s one of the few thing i find joy in i don t enjoy many thing anymore because everything i care about always get taken away i don t understand why i exist at this point is it just to lie to and hurt the people i care for