im really frustratedi feel like life uphill battle years now back  younger brother killed himself ive always anxiety constantly dip depression realization struggling much always bothered me dropped school struggled years manipulative figures life lot bad decisions recently found way go back school ive picking up always feel lonely feel like talk anyone life point none make feel better talking always makes feel pathetic many people life give terrible advice way support makes feel worse despite good intentions month im really behind rent terrified evicted feel like im going ruin anything ive tried build past year know keep holding on family cares guess want hurt them im aware reason really working anymore worse feel less reasons hurt matter constantly think hurting regular basis think things ever line work out