heartbrokeni posted earlier week ago subreddit again ranting feel like anyone talk would get personal either way did feel comfortable ranting way gets less personal me since one obligated respond either way want write im very tired ive suffering depression anxiety bpd insecurity complex years im tired all want live life like mentally healthy  year old girl once feel like im missing much mind practically always convincing scared nervous wary something whenever try reach goal terrible thoughts ways go wrong much im going fuck up ill never succeed im tired mind trying keep past making rewind terrible moments growing abusive household times made use of bullying people thought good friends spreading lies making people dislike me could person knew love them would anything them mainly used attention sex behind back flirting god knows what im tired know good heart want best anyone around me know im soft try see good people long realised people are matter sweet friendly helpful am always stabbed back constant fear friends drop decide turn me many goals hopes thoughts make seem unreachable cannot see lot good myself im tired this heart aching badly made several plans distance anyone one miss im gone method use places one find longer time since still bit hope myself execute this one angry myself angry fact im good enough everything fault whatnot im also angry dare give up constantly tell im loser go way think anyone innocent taken lives losers anything negative myself anger fear also keeps it im still scared wouldve gotten better gets worse know do hopes getting less less