walking around productive boyfriend emancipation papers not filled out big plan going go live life pursue college told friends going leave family which feel like emotionally mentally abusive sure go get apartment finish highschool go straight college med school problem is actually done that past year got pulled school twice suicide watch grades plummeted quit sports team cut friends stopped showing work tried kill myself recently getting worse home father become controlling grounding stupid things taking away car letting see boyfriend friends gaslighting spending time him etc mother gotten better manipulated think fine husband hand says reason mothers health deteriorated stepparents said reason family dysfunctional sometimes like think stronger others worse friends true all weaker them life easy want stop existing awful shit happened kid ill admit late lifes bad could be idk feel stupid living vida depressy