without distractions feel crippling anxiety complete blanknessi seek forms escapism anything else distracts life things like movies social events eating out course sleep im something im sitting there begin think happens remind nothing matters worse someone love could die moment crippling write stories rnosleep sometimes writing process comments messages get biggest thing life believe not helps lot distract me help escape actual life have people leave thankful comments supportive messages enjoyed story keeps sane even lasts days reminds people care stop posting stories wake up whenever im distracted state called life dreadful anxiety feelings meaningless return know else do im probably making post distract again get comments remind people care exist