give good timeive social anxiety forever makes hard awkward talk people pair low selfesteem im basically spectator conversation everyone realizes torments knowing parents hate say theyre gonna send away rehab cant stay fucking clean head plagued suicidal thoughts every time like goto solution me instead actually solving situation lay bed think somewhere tie stab im much unmotivated shit fix problems nothing fun never find reason get bed morning go pop fucking pills fuck xanax feels good confident person ive always wanted be everyone school knows pop pills im known crackhead guy deep know redflag answer straight born life constantly battling brain want live maybe im edgy  year old one thing assure life going nowhere anyway besides drugs gonna kill anyway sure im gonna today one days know mean mom screamed called fucking disappointment might go get tonight im sure shed happy one less bourdon hands