futile hopeless invisible looked overno one understands thats basic problem have one knows anything similar ive experienced life absolutely clue one listens im left drowning sea filled hopeless voices wishing someone could hear them try things gotten better since  ive hoping hoping hoping putting fight trying keep head water allowing captivated dreams im longer fixated im completely submerged lost fight  now  years long time wait half life ive lived like this try reach out one cares say care say talk ghosted always ghosted ignored respond obviously read wrote therapists unhelpful worse mean one saw year treated like nuisance like better things speak me phd social activism even psychology  university ive hospital multiple times help im small invisible