need helpi while came ask advices friend bad state mind right worried her friends long time went lot always helping depressed suicidal meant still means lot got better last months really want die looking forward whats next happen life problem still make suicidal jokes depression statements funny even sick try help someone often joke start following jokes get scared dont know stop one started it like friend talking depressed state understand know help even ive went situation sometimes try start conversation bad joke mine trash meme dies fast seems want talk understand that ive experienced still want help know how u advices please type everything appreciated