want start saying might kill least considering too kill tonight tomorrow something lingers within mei think mostly know fail school royally teachers believe me friends probably believe either mom lying herself know able genuinely lazy promise exaggeration really lazy sometimes cannot bring learn even wanted toi dread going back school summer dread living life even though many things look forward lifebig things like moving out relationship meeting internet friends first time also little things like third season favourite show announced video games preordered going friends everything between however things will end outweighed failing everythingi feel like reached end whether end life something insignificant cannot tell endi hate much think depressed either tired so tired scared failing done iti prepared life come considered running away home make sensenothing makes sense situation tried swear god fucking tried would organise papers books school reflect every evening learned school two weeks would slowly stop tried method fucking often workmy grades bad means truly good know redflaging like this rambling shit none writing form structure sorry thatcan anyone please give advice better person sorry saying appropriate subreddit know talk to sorry english bad english speaking country feel like failing