justify livingi cant seem justify continue living  th attempt university yet again going shitter wasted tens thousands dollars parents money cant it eating disorders ruled life  years long mentalphysical health shambles live state almost friends family person think staying so also state thing kept alive past year becoming chore even stay alive him family hometown friends fine dealt redflags past cant validate living almost everyday feels like torture theres light tunnel tend  good days average per week meanwhile rest existence obligation comfort others help please edit good days fighting unidentifiable depression sadness real depression like pulled dark abyss without knowing chosen sink nothing reason