point life failed cog capitalist machinethis another story another loser useful skills interests friends ambition know all read many times point life one look forward nothing else working miserable jobs pay food shelter point life one look forward nothing fired bow scrape beg find another one one ends street point one look forward nothing else failing health death old age death nuclear war reason alive big coward afraid kill myself afraid pain afraid failing and laugh now afraid hell atheist cannot free fear wrong hell satan real