im itmy boyfriend broke me had edit im mobile im sorry format know post vague emotional state couldnt think clearly ended taking way im supposed take daily adderall got back hospital  hours know one probably see care ive finally made willing choice seeing therapist hard open people therapy never helped me want happy love myself whole story long complicated point anyone struggling mental illness please seek help extremely difficult know sometimes even venting someone feel better showing weakness strongest thing do took years learn this im sorry rambling im still  ill okay hope helps someone mean im  havent experienced lot life ive fair share internal struggle didnt believe therapy hope now