main reason continuing live anymoreive struggling self harm im point im addicted it people always say addictions stay forever always fight dont want live rest life dealing burden self harm addictions frowned upon want live judgement family people dad drug addict issues always vowed nothing like him last night realized im exactly like awful father addictions im addicted self harm dont want associated addictions drugs people think differently whole life ive always wanted kids grow main reason staying alive could kids im awful like dad kids deserve mom ive always close mom drug talks made obvious fronds upon thought self harm addiction mom thinks im screw up nothing wrong great mom reason im screw purely fault family deserve burden like that crying thought go this im selfish thinking me shows im thinking myself genuinely think deserve deserve self harm genuinely understand anyone cares anymore going die eventually kill im inevitable think might take pills soon deserve deserve pain self harm