sitting parking lot wanting end allim really bad emotionally abusive relationship want leave cant guilt eating alive leave home cant think anything else ive driving around trying entertain myself trying entertain eating disorder mostly think much pain hes caused me manipulative hows never tried help me im embarrassed admit people relationship failing even parents really want son law cant handle pressure anymore days fine act anything less perfect hell make fun me panic attack two weeks got left like didnt want deal it want run car ramp im sure thatll kill completely dont want live like anymore much doubt hating myself dont know anymore