puzzle lifeits almost funny one even notices knows true feelings deep emotional breakdown im going im unable really express truly feel inside say wanna live seen bad overrated overreacted meaningless damn im really sick thing called life think soon ill gather courage selfish levels need kill myself feel inside building up bulging odd feeling something wrong different previous times ive feeling similar stronger different stronger me soon enough people regret trying connect earlier probably sooner later theyll find letter too little piece ask omg see this could calm conscience needed need regrets tears blaming guilt certainly want die either cant keep going want pain stop literally make stop killing myself wish way could that rewind tape back lets say six years ago id say people die redflag foolish selfish ironically understand that think nothing luck decisions take embody actions lead us closer closer appear happen us next like puzzle puzzle life bring pieces together decisions actions inseparable theyre us were them follow rules puzzle life feel every single decision made life getting closer closer end im finding right now early days school closed isolated others followed aftermaths more following way feel think acting accordingly that slowly surely im led end edge hope bliss love real descending darkness inner self losing ability construct real point view constructing one real handle reality crushes way escape disappearing appearance disappearing suffering it pain inevitable choice moment great despair notion choice deadly one see me hear me touch me life empty thats me now