overwhelming feeling lately right feel like longer go broken get feel like missing pieces know describe properly almost feels horrific way put like whole bunch body parts amputated years feel irreversibly disfigured mentally once gradually time like one day might wake look see leg gone hand missing fingers makes feel sick like body horror see feel it never go mutilated get feels like something puts surgical table injects sedative cannot move still see still feel straps takes pieces throws back world figure come terms new disfigurements horrific numb tired scream react like waking nightmare one see mei cannot explain properly trapped feeling silently horrified also tired want lay rest parts allowed rest gone too like eyelids removed shamble onwards feeling like trapped sawinspired gauntlet losing piece piece grotesque traps point even sure want get irreversibly mutilated feel broken beyond repair