anxiety pushing edgei sick life cannot enjoy single minute without brain reminding fucking loser everything failure made big post rdepression sum up hate myself nothing going me almost  live shitty basement relationship since  driving license never travelled never year felt good defeat defeat it gets better yet failing school potential jobs friends family nightmares every night upcoming exams failed hard last year told horrible field every single day fear upcoming stuff feared first  weeks fo years months going lot courses etc went fine felt anxiety something else exams  days first exam brain already decided fail it big exam end month yup probably fail too dont want live fear wont ever get drivers license fear capable right never get girlfriend know waaay better men there terms do nice look cannot swim think gets dark  hours ill jump drown panic hopefully never found sorry everyone hurt good life life meant everyone