names joey ever since th grade redflag teacher total prick would yell class mentally abusive fuck us sure part trauma ik strong people def added part trauma anyways developed social redflag generalized redflag disorder hindered ability make friends like  friends max talked sometimes too even close friends redflag lack motivation would spend day playing laptop bit younger escape me could avoid life play video games day parents lenient started developing depressive disorder probably also started smoking weed gram day strong dispensary weed  year brain fucked could think all could concentrate anything like minute hell could even concentrate remember like anything like past day two contemplating starving death know fuck realized ways time now got nurse practitioner gave citalopramantidepressant ssri recommended counselling accepted counselling time declined later got phone call receptonist make counselling appointment whatever thought feel better was side effects sucked sex drive really insomnia started smoking gram day  days went psychosis got extremely anxious agitated panicky even yelled parents told mom fuck thought redflag knew not anyways broken inside redflag disorder could handle it psychosis looking antidepressants something help sleep think weed combo sorry wasting time r reading ik lot writing story m