nothing helps thoughts fantasies redflagno kind words supportive messages positive events goddamn thing theyre temporary highs end back pit depression graduate high school cool happy dont care start making hr fresh high school working dream job cool happy stoked back suicidal ideation get project car keep busy cool fun back depression nothing fuckin helps ever always comes back always sticks around always sittin back head waiting tiniest crack shield blast go hey fuckface time killed yourself eh heres million ways it get thinkin matter tells itll get better dont matter whos support me matter good things happen life fucking pisses off feeling like this ive got pretty damn good life thinking id better  foot under makes hate even more think big part isolated people much long know feel anything else thats case going get milestones worse im done school forced interact people age ive got like  close friends never willingly hang out know to keep busy occupied kind work mind races they really like you road come back sweat buckets heart pounds hard feels like gonna rip chest stumble damn near every word versus like sentence cause know socialize everyone says im hard worker got good work ethic im dedicated boils im fuckin scared anything but work cause mind takes suicidal dreams begin fuckin stop im scared im tired want end