think handle feeling much longeri experienced happiest moments life someone think one right belongs words soul mate oir relation started adultery bc iswas married kids one year gave me support made stupid mistakes lived la la land way get much someway treated like shit putting away hold couple months ago exploded go ahead divorce bad trauma parents daughters attempted harm several times etc call off went therapy reconnect myself gained self esteem months later talked terms livs were conclusions made went wrong really gone therapy changed man th man deserved willing gave nd chance really saw impossible improvement mental health and alone time period went trough heavy shit moment waiting him literally last stand opportunity love dead mess without him life tasteless e even good friends nice evenings end thoughts always go te person completely understands share intimacy trust like one else planet  months contact guys try new things work me came conclusion one make happy like despite shittorm around us usually say happy e want be always assumes equal parter woman life said waiting return tomorrowhe returning psicological therapeutic clinic  important things discussed abandonement issues sixth feeling tells rertun mad love me touch me see me kiss instead still trapped web past traumas simply cant see destroy future much cost take first step everyone cheering us hopping best fell hollow like go guillotine confirmation love enough really love like do despite confessions  happy other cant stop crying days overdose colapse love friends good therapist one understands feeling loss knowing thats person make happy other man mr right give time fuck tired word time want happy now tomorrow things go hell cant want keep fighting want go path get motivated reality one  connection family good friends cant give really want need professionally best what still miserable hell years ago would first person say you need man happy true need half half cant even though darkest time well idk simple nothing left everything experience like  minutes fame misery again tomorrow faith life decided hands person end alone cant see point continue life anything else ai think go stop car bridge jump less dramatic soon arrive home swallow hole bottle pills night next morning nothing done literally want live world keep struggling fighting going therapy glimpse sunshine ray random part day thank much read excuse length hope great day