want die stupid reasonsi guess first reason stupid grew emotionally abusive manipulative house amp im kinds fucked up next living fact emotionally abused ex around year ago we  fucking immature known better feel truly like matured changed one wants near know abuser plus girl still feels like shit amp hates fucking much told kill myself deserve it friends girlfriend feel alone cant even put words much pain feel feeling years know im  might sound like im trying edgy truly lost hope life im ungrateful could sick homeless fuck is wrong 