ive finally realized somethingfirst all ill apologize errors post submitting mobile doubt many people read anyway im sure im apologizing im even bothering put throwaway nevertheless ive battling severe depression anxiety past eight years now selfharm selfhate like job recently admit needed help finally decided medicate myself intensify feelings ive increasingly paralyzing panic attacks self mutilating almost every day since hate feeling like this honestly like remember like genuinely happy thats realized  really want earth anymore yes amazing support system theyre thing keeping here im  years old ill graduating college soon ive heart broken truly believe im worth loved hate see every single day look mirror im unpopular even lonely im tired sad time ive missed classes count want get go life thing holding ending knowing badly would hurt others guess ill continue hurt means hurting end im loss guess im really looking answer sort needed let out