bad place right nowive strong intrusive thoughts addition anxiety panic depression want live like this im afraid losing control suicidal thoughts escape horrible feel every day chronic physical impairments make even harder continue want die want change im afraid getting killed stuck inside head time one friend constantly rely her try talk get things chest i believe bottling things really started mental issues seems help slightly im alone feel terrible mind races cant find peace im afraid leave bed afraid stay it dying seems answer me want to therapy meds much anything all world waiting get better