took pills im dyinghey ampxb problems long mental illness depersonalizationderealization greatly diminishes cognitive abilities traumatic experience young homosexual dad tried kill suspected might homosexual understand felt way do matter though solve anything isolated decade caused kinds mental problems anyway talked dad changing major collage years ago refused let leave engineering mental illness way going succeed comprehend anything failing changed major without telling him told alright collage beginning semester dad money problems losing mind it told graduating semester lie one semester go now semester thinks im going get degree days now nothing resolved sexuality nothing theres way out im fed everything took  pills paracetamol once google search said would see symptoms  hours less  hours im already seeing symptoms now feel dizzy im vomiting im sorry im making much sense thats barely concentrate feel dizzy anyway hit might going hell im realizing sad shocked mother sisters brother going be let tell you terrifying im sure think do know want stay alive theres nothing want problems could handle think guys think im absolutely losing mind ampxb