know dothis first time life ive suicidal thoughts think would much easier stopped existing stress national exam coming preparing last  years think pass preparing alright quarantine motivation gone touched books since april worst part parents think studying first time ive lying absolutely hate it fail exam career prospects nil opted stupid stream pass exam life probably spent working job hate making minimum wage start shaking whenever think future really know do great student came top class without even trying everyone know expects achieve great things really want sleep thing keeping redflag family would sad