end erafor whole life irony depression loneliness followed me ive always tried stay optimistic positive time goes seems fade away im  years old absolutely nothing look forward to girlfriend talent self esteem everyday wake happy  minutes realize amnobody self image bullying people opinions frankly opinions dont matter always felt life doomed day could walk always polite respectable try good moral citizen yet always seem contradict morals preach guess im possibly awakening cant take voices anymore head sight flesh whole essence tainted useless go it want family know love wish nothing best generous people forum showed kindness understanding thank you