hope liehey all ive suffering depression almost  years now past weeks taken turn worst though almost friends drifted away life become complete shit even low standards yesterday got back exam results terrible id banking results least give life semblance hope reason live told would definitely kill day talk redflag hotline decided hang another day today appointment psychiatrist one talk besides her past  times visited fine felt better least suicidal visits times today however aggressive irritated stance towards me kept forcing say things clearly uncomfortable with plus claimed lying  time told couldnt perfectly recall specific details due addled state mind time didnt seem listen realised every time slight bit hope always turns wrong friends used confide ignore tell problems try hang them thought results could make it didnt work out thought maybe psychiatrist could help me didnt work well fuck it kill end week edit talked mother im fine now think