am despicable rotten personthere multiple reasons want end life reasons want end life want end it girlfriend fight constantly get rejected every job apply im stuck current one unable get circle debt self loathing may big part it hate way am hate way treat others hate treat myself ive tried change seek help therapy unaffordable right tbh straw broke camels back glasses broke today didnt super glue tape wasnt working work home tried find something put back together couldnt harmed girlfriend broke me glasses broke qas stressed qhen text her say saying fucked yep felt like care one ever really genuinely cares anyways unless something them thinking this drove edge harmed again graduated high school  years ago done nothing life  years planet feel like despicable rotten failure never get hole im in may well lie die it told whole life get better fucking doesnt nothing gets fucking better fuck anyone says so lying