need lay thoughts somewherei cant cry cant i crying good takes away pain reliefs aching soul time feel like crying im walking rain yea love rain much since cry anymore  years sounds right pain thoughts overwhelming mind why tried hard really did ended like this love family least hate  talking behind back like cant hear acting nice simulating care me pretend like care polite anymore cant help them god want help them wish could mom dad get along better stupid realise stupid honest open talk problems solve them selfish ignorant wanna end like that hate you dad moving us countryside thats grew up putting hard construction work even tho  health problems glad now built house back even admit it   years im still lazy care silly house course  hate cant wait go away asap see crying coz im visiting anymore like dad cant get job you cant get girlfriend unless take one dumb girls village cant go one best friend ever wanted come here im glad decided follow faculty finish leave alone behind shit hate ones made me going insane loosing mind succes way man cant find anyone love sick broken am wanted care ones love help happy happy that consumed drained happiness gave back hatred im full kindness love id anything them stupid me care love them use me im much full hatred  hate world cold gave everything you silly girl would still do never ever forced anything comfortable with made sacrifices you waited stood side get better  full months day day knew knew told you even say appreciate much im like others urging sex sex yet gave hope one week go back him play broken heart knew fell you knew felt me still love her fall her beautiful smart full life still dumb dumb love smile much eases pain feel like floating bs im you im drowning again full hate full resentment full world fake hypocrites everyone hates me everything going bad gone far god wanna ignorant godcentered person still believe him saved death several times plan me avoided death continue suffering job stupid world take away pain others bear it im strong im breaking down again im lost alone least friend dont know wouldve done without him well know wouldve killed long ago guess delayed it maybe not maybe today still owe life cant throw like that want help problems want ease pain suffering hes like brother fooling kill im afraid die nonexistent feeling feeling nothing ohh yea ive thought countless nights cant even comprehend death like im scared it wish could die wish would die ill keep living guess want rain need rain need cry pain hurts heart neck suffocating me another sleepless night alone hope maybe tomorrow find someone help feel better new reason live someone could make alright someone could exhaust death make happy still happy it today maybe tomorrow wont ive hope many times guess im suffer see world unlike passengers maybe better im poor wouldve surely went drugs try wish could afford something more actually gift something ones matter return im fakehappy guy cares everyone sacrifices others im sad lost cause im miserable be least im feeling bit better now