hate living whats newive depressed long time    years mainly stemming couple points im smart struggled  heres thing cant even type damn post cant even find energy that studying lectures recorded im not keep letting fall farther farther behind like complete moron piece shit right want die think want even went bought tank helium could gas myself sit huge pussy even want type anymore want end life ampxb typed couple days ago bit settled still think im going end life probably end month campus night way makes ruckus next day want keep living life anymore matter life always struggle might well get done waiting around suffer more end month keep trying therapy keep trying catch school work already know end month take life ampxb think best option ill make one post around th oct