counts alcoholicnobody thinks need help apparentlyim  years old female last year half maybe two years ive drinking heavily say heavily mean buy gallon liquor end night often times alone theres little less half bottle left drink get itchy shaky cant think worst ive drank fifth every night months tried stop thought heart attack delirium episode think speak shaking lessened still cant go one might without getting blackout drunk also struggled cocaine month long binges feel like im verge death force stop least month people tell im young alcoholic drug addict feel overtaken personality first foremost im drinker drug user secondly im whatever person used be need help know go went er couple weeks ago redflag attempt got help im end ropes honestly want end life im sorry im drunk im writing this