last fall life fine applying universities across globe getting accepted few even got good scholarships for decided decline offers reason yet discover thought better options me then got accepted dream university happened country always dreamed moving to started telling everybody moving country then scholarship announcement day came out get scholarship declined every single offer given point stupid enough think one university would work out not look like failure everyone much going me backfiring already told boss would coming back fall already found replacement job month stuck going shitty community college hometown rural west usa everyone always talks hard rejected dream school harder get accepted able afford itnothing seems working me direction try seems work out friends going dream schools across country stuck hometown without job much going gone hard think life could should be living right now life literally crumbling eyes 