one, while being many.” This becomes a far more essential idea in the side of the asymmetrical arch, though frequently I allude to the idea of very early in treatment. multiple self-states Nevertheless, it is in the therapist’s capacity to identify the respective edges and “forward trailing edges” of each partner’s complaint, that the theme of their respective and dread” is “hope revealed. In this manner, the therapist not only develops a powerful identification with each of their experiences of and dread”, but even more importantly, also powerfully demonstrates “hope what is happening that is their states of transference. To do so, she points out how the activating edge (the hopeful longings) of each partner’s transference triggers one another’s “forward” edges (the dreaded experience), rapidly linking their experience of with one of “trailing” “hope” in a circularly reinforcing fashion. “dread”, Two and Three, augment what is undertaken in Step One. Step Two is profoundly ensconced in the idea of realism” epistemological “perspectival wherein we must accede to the idea that there is actually something we are all relating to that we call That it is something that we agree truly exists, notwithstanding the fact that our “reality”. subjective experiences of can differ mightily. Simultaneously however, we must recognize “it” that whatever that is that we are referring to as is that no one can “it” “reality”, “something” apprehend in totality. At best, each of us can only have our unique perspectival of it.” “slice Hence, differences in our perspectives are both abundant and yet completely expectable. This then, is the essential rub of human nature and relationality. To varying degrees, we agree or disagree about our respective perspectives - that which we collectively call “reality.” The commonality of disagreements in couple’s treatment underscore why I speak of it as often involving a of epistemologies.” In the most extreme cases, where differences in the points “war of view about what is and are of great importance, partners can end up feeling that “true” “real”
one, while being many.” This becomes a far more essential idea in the asymmetrical side of the arch, though frequently I allude to the idea of multiple self-states very early in treatment. Nevertheless, it is in the therapist’s capacity to identify the respective “forward edges and trailing edges” of each partner’s complaint, that the theme of their respective “hope and dread” is revealed. In this manner, the therapist not only develops a powerful identification with each of their experiences of “hope and dread”, but even more importantly, also powerfully demonstrates what is happening that is activating their states of transference. To do so, she points out how the “forward” edge (the hopeful longings) of each partner’s transference triggers one another’s “trailing” edges (the dreaded experience), rapidly linking their experience of “hope” with one of “dread”, in a circularly reinforcing fashion. Two and Three, augment what is undertaken in Step One. Step Two is profoundly ensconced in the epistemological idea of “perspectival realism” wherein we must accede to the idea that there is actually something we are all relating to that we call “reality”. That it is something that we agree truly exists, notwithstanding the fact that our subjective experiences of “it” can differ mightily. Simultaneously however, we must recognize that whatever that “it” is that we are referring to as “reality”, is “something” that no one can apprehend in totality. At best, each of us can only have our unique perspectival “slice of it.” Hence, differences in our perspectives are both abundant and yet completely expectable. This then, is the essential rub of human nature and relationality. To varying degrees, we agree or disagree about our respective perspectives - that which we collectively call “reality.” The commonality of disagreements in couple’s treatment underscore why I speak of it as often involving a “war of epistemologies.” In the most extreme cases, where differences in the points of view about what is “true” and “real” are of great importance, partners can end up feeling that
CJ-BK-MADRID-PRESENTATION-2018.docx