Create Positive Present Work on issues in the present and the future, not in the past. Rather than looking for – blame and recrimination, steer conversations toward seeking solutions. Any time you feel that you making progress or that you know what to do next, return to the aren’t don’t basic four questions: What do you want? What are you doing to get what you want? Is it working? Do you want to figure out another way? Negotiating Limits and Rules Are you law-abiding? Do you follow the rules? (Most people will say yes.) When the freeway speed limit says 70 mph, do you drive 75? 78? If so, why? If a meeting is set to start at 8:00 A.M., do you arrive at 8:05? Is that OK? Are you still law-abiding? Are you still the “following rules”?
Create Positive Present – Work on issues in the present and the future, not in the past. Rather than looking for blame and recrimination, steer conversations toward seeking solutions. Any time you feel that you aren’t making progress or that you don’t know what to do next, return to the basic four questions: What do you want? What are you doing to get what you want? Is it working? Do you want to figure out another way? Negotiating Limits and Rules Are you law-abiding? Do you follow the rules? (Most people will say yes.) When the freeway speed limit says 70 mph, do you drive 75? 78? If so, why? If a meeting is set to start at 8:00 A.M., do you arrive at 8:05? Is that OK? Are you still law-abiding? Are you still “following the rules”?