对父母的感受和需要，积累多年无法释放，凝结在心中变成一个死结。而这种感受和需要，最方便的投射对象，就是伴侣。所以，在认为伴侣没有达到自己预期时，在认为伴侣忽视自己，不尊重自己时，先觉察自己，这种感受到底是谁带给自己的？伴侣也许只是躺枪而已。
The feelings and needs of parents that have accumulated for many years have become unreleased and condensed into a dead end. And the most convenient object of such feelings and needs, the most convenient projection, is the partner. So, when you think that a partner has not met his or her expectations, when you think that a partner has neglected and disrespected himself or herself, you know who has given it to yourself? Perhaps the partner is just a lying gun.