Chapter: Actus Tertius. Scene 1.

Enter Hero and two Gentlemen, Margaret, and Vrsula.

  Hero. Good Margaret runne thee to the parlour,
There shalt thou finde my Cosin Beatrice,
Proposing with the Prince and Claudio,
Whisper her eare, and tell her I and Vrsula,
Walke in the Orchard, and our whole discourse
Is all of her, say that thou ouer-heardst vs,
And bid her steale into the pleached bower,
Where hony-suckles ripened by the sunne,
Forbid the sunne to enter: like fauourites,
Made proud by Princes, that aduance their pride,
Against that power that bred it, there will she hide her,
To listen our purpose, this is thy office,
Beare thee well in it, and leaue vs alone

   Marg. Ile make her come I warrant you presently

   Hero. Now Vrsula, when Beatrice doth come,
As we do trace this alley vp and downe,
Our talke must onely be of Benedicke,
When I doe name him, let it be thy part,
To praise him more then euer man did merit,
My talke to thee must be how Benedicke
Is sicke in loue with Beatrice; of this matter,
Is little Cupids crafty arrow made,
That onely wounds by heare-say: now begin,
Enter Beatrice.

For looke where Beatrice like a Lapwing runs
Close by the ground, to heare our conference

   Vrs. The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish
Cut with her golden ores the siluer streame,
And greedily deuoure the treacherous baite:
So angle we for Beatrice, who euen now,
Is couched in the wood-bine couerture,
Feare you not my part of the Dialogue

   Her. Then go we neare her that her eare loose nothing,
Of the false sweete baite that we lay for it:
No truely Vrsula, she is too disdainfull,
I know her spirits are as coy and wilde,
As Haggerds of the rocke

   Vrsula. But are you sure,
That Benedicke loues Beatrice so intirely?
  Her. So saies the Prince, and my new trothed Lord

   Vrs. And did they bid you tell her of it, Madam?
  Her. They did intreate me to acquaint her of it,
But I perswaded them, if they lou'd Benedicke,
To wish him wrastle with affection,
And neuer to let Beatrice know of it

   Vrsula. Why did you so, doth not the Gentleman
Deserue as full as fortunate a bed,
As euer Beatrice shall couch vpon?
  Hero. O God of loue! I know he doth deserue,
As much as may be yeelded to a man:
But Nature neuer fram'd a womans heart,
Of prowder stuffe then that of Beatrice:
Disdaine and Scorne ride sparkling in her eyes,
Mis-prizing what they looke on, and her wit
Values it selfe so highly, that to her
All matter else seemes weake: she cannot loue,
Nor take no shape nor proiect of affection,
Shee is so selfe indeared

   Vrsula. Sure I thinke so,
And therefore certainely it were not good
She knew his loue, lest she make sport at it

   Hero. Why you speake truth, I neuer yet saw man,
How wise, how noble, yong, how rarely featur'd.
But she would spell him backward: if faire fac'd,
She would sweare the gentleman should be her sister:
If blacke, why Nature drawing of an anticke,
Made a foule blot: if tall, a launce ill headed:
If low, an agot very vildlie cut:
If speaking, why a vane blowne with all windes:
If silent, why a blocke moued with none.
So turnes she euery man the wrong side out,
And neuer giues to Truth and Vertue, that
Which simplenesse and merit purchaseth

   Vrsu. Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable

   Hero. No, not to be so odde, and from all fashions,
As Beatrice is, cannot be commendable,
But who dare tell her so? if I should speake,
She would mocke me into ayre, O she would laugh me
Out of my selfe, presse me to death with wit,
Therefore let Benedicke like couered fire,
Consume away in sighes, waste inwardly:
It were a better death, to die with mockes,
Which is as bad as die with tickling

   Vrsu. Yet tell her of it, heare what shee will say

   Hero. No, rather I will goe to Benedicke,
And counsaile him to fight against his passion,
And truly Ile deuise some honest slanders,
To staine my cosin with, one doth not know,
How much an ill word may impoison liking

   Vrsu. O doe not doe your cosin such a wrong,
She cannot be so much without true iudgement,
Hauing so swift and excellent a wit
As she is prisde to haue, as to refuse
So rare a Gentleman as signior Benedicke

   Hero. He is the onely man of Italy,
Alwaies excepted, my deare Claudio

   Vrsu. I pray you be not angry with me, Madame,
Speaking my fancy: Signior Benedicke,
For shape, for bearing argument and valour,
Goes formost in report through Italy

   Hero. Indeed he hath an excellent good name

   Vrsu. His excellence did earne it ere he had it:
When are you married Madame?
  Hero. Why euerie day to morrow, come goe in,
Ile shew thee some attires, and haue thy counsell,
Which is the best to furnish me to morrow

   Vrsu. Shee's tane I warrant you,
We haue caught her Madame?
  Hero. If it proue so, then louing goes by haps,
Some Cupid kills with arrowes, some with traps.
Enter.

  Beat. What fire is in mine eares? can this be true?
Stand I condemn'd for pride and scorne so much?
Contempt, farewell, and maiden pride, adew,
No glory liues behinde the backe of such.
And Benedicke, loue on, I will requite thee,
Taming my wilde heart to thy louing hand:
If thou dost loue, my kindnesse shall incite thee
To binde our loues vp in a holy band.
For others say thou dost deserue, and I
Beleeue it better then reportingly.
Enter.


Scene 2.

Enter Prince, Claudio, Benedicke, and Leonato.

  Prince. I doe but stay till your marriage be consummate,
and then go I toward Arragon

   Clau. Ile bring you thither my Lord, if you'l vouchsafe
me

   Prin. Nay, that would be as great a soyle in the new
glosse of your marriage, as to shew a childe his new coat
and forbid him to weare it, I will onely bee bold with
Benedicke for his companie, for from the crowne of his
head, to the sole of his foot, he is all mirth, he hath twice
or thrice cut Cupids bow-string, and the little hang-man
dare not shoot at him, he hath a heart as sound as a bell,
and his tongue is the clapper, for what his heart thinkes,
his tongue speakes

   Bene. Gallants, I am not as I haue bin

   Leo. So say I, methinkes you are sadder

   Claud. I hope he be in loue

   Prin. Hang him truant, there's no true drop of bloud
in him to be truly toucht with loue, if he be sad, he wants
money

   Bene. I haue the tooth-ach

   Prin. Draw it

   Bene. Hang it

   Claud. You must hang it first, and draw it afterwards

   Prin. What? sigh for the tooth-ach

   Leon. Where is but a humour or a worme

   Bene. Well, euery one cannot master a griefe, but hee
that has it

   Clau. Yet say I, he is in loue

   Prin. There is no appearance of fancie in him, vnlesse
it be a fancy that he hath to strange disguises, as to bee a
Dutchman to day, a Frenchman to morrow: vnlesse hee
haue a fancy to this foolery, as it appeares hee hath, hee
is no foole for fancy, as you would haue it to appeare
he is

   Clau. If he be not in loue with some woman, there
is no beleeuing old signes, a brushes his hat a mornings,
What should that bode?
  Prin. Hath any man seene him at the Barbers?
  Clau. No, but the Barbers man hath beene seen with
him, and the olde ornament of his cheeke hath alreadie
stuft tennis balls

   Leon. Indeed he lookes yonger than hee did, by the
losse of a beard

   Prin. Nay a rubs himselfe with Ciuit, can you smell
him out by that?
  Clau. That's as much as to say, the sweet youth's in
loue

   Prin. The greatest note of it is his melancholy

   Clau. And when was he wont to wash his face?
  Prin. Yea, or to paint himselfe? for the which I heare
what they say of him

   Clau. Nay, but his iesting spirit, which is now crept
into a lute-string, and now gouern'd by stops

   Prin. Indeed that tels a heauy tale for him: conclude,
he is in loue

   Clau. Nay, but I know who loues him

   Prince. That would I know too, I warrant one that
knowes him not

   Cla. Yes, and his ill conditions, and in despight of all,
dies for him

   Prin. Shee shall be buried with her face vpwards

   Bene. Yet is this no charme for the tooth-ake, old signior,
walke aside with mee, I haue studied eight or nine
wise words to speake to you, which these hobby-horses
must not heare

   Prin. For my life to breake with him about Beatrice

   Clau. 'Tis euen so, Hero and Margaret haue by this
played their parts with Beatrice, and then the two Beares
will not bite one another when they meete.
Enter Iohn the Bastard.

  Bast. My Lord and brother, God saue you

   Prin. Good den brother

   Bast. If your leisure seru'd, I would speake with you

   Prince. In priuate?
  Bast. If it please you, yet Count Claudio may heare,
for what I would speake of, concernes him

   Prin. What's the matter?
  Basta. Meanes your Lordship to be married to morrow?
  Prin. You know he does

   Bast. I know not that when he knowes what I know

   Clau. If there be any impediment, I pray you discouer
it

   Bast. You may thinke I loue you not, let that appeare
hereafter, and ayme better at me by that I now will manifest,
for my brother (I thinke, he holds you well, and in
dearenesse of heart) hath holpe to effect your ensuing
marriage: surely sute ill spent, and labour ill bestowed

   Prin. Why, what's the matter?
  Bastard. I came hither to tell you, and circumstances
shortned, (for she hath beene too long a talking of) the
Lady is disloyall

   Clau. Who Hero?
  Bast. Euen shee, Leonatoes Hero, your Hero, euery
mans Hero

   Clau. Disloyall?
  Bast. The word is too good to paint out her wickednesse,
I could say she were worse, thinke you of a worse
title, and I will fit her to it: wonder not till further warrant:
goe but with mee to night, you shal see her chamber
window entred, euen the night before her wedding
day, if you loue her, then to morrow wed her: But it
would better fit your honour to change your minde

   Claud. May this be so?
  Princ. I will not thinke it

   Bast. If you dare not trust that you see, confesse not
that you know: if you will follow mee, I will shew you
enough, and when you haue seene more, & heard more,
proceed accordingly

   Clau. If I see any thing to night, why I should not
marry her to morrow in the congregation, where I shold
wedde, there will I shame her

   Prin. And as I wooed for thee to obtaine her, I will
ioyne with thee to disgrace her

   Bast. I will disparage her no farther, till you are my
witnesses, beare it coldly but till night, and let the issue
shew it selfe

   Prin. O day vntowardly turned!
  Claud. O mischiefe strangelie thwarting!
  Bastard. O plague right well preuented! so will you
say, when you haue seene the sequele.


Enter.


Scene 3.

Enter Dogbery and his compartner with the watch.

  Dog. Are you good men and true?
  Verg. Yea, or else it were pitty but they should suffer
saluation body and soule

   Dogb. Nay, that were a punishment too good for
them, if they should haue any allegiance in them, being
chosen for the Princes watch

   Verges. Well, giue them their charge, neighbour
Dogbery

   Dog. First, who thinke you the most desartlesse man
to be Constable

   Watch.1. Hugh Ote-cake sir, or George Sea-coale, for
they can write and reade

   Dogb. Come hither neighbour Sea-coale, God hath
blest you with a good name: to be a wel-fauoured man,
is the gift of Fortune, but to write and reade, comes by
Nature

   Watch 2. Both which Master Constable
  Dogb. You haue: I knew it would be your answere:
well, for your fauour sir, why giue God thankes, & make
no boast of it, and for your writing and reading, let that
appeare when there is no need of such vanity, you are
thought heere to be the most senslesse and fit man for the
Constable of the watch: therefore beare you the lanthorne:
this is your charge: You shall comprehend all
vagrom men, you are to bid any man stand in the Princes
name

   Watch 2. How if a will not stand?
  Dogb. Why then take no note of him, but let him go,
and presently call the rest of the Watch together, and
thanke God you are ridde of a knaue

   Verges. If he will not stand when he is bidden, hee is
none of the Princes subiects

   Dogb. True, and they are to meddle with none but
the Princes subiects: you shall also make no noise in the
streetes: for, for the Watch to babble and talke, is most
tollerable, and not to be indured

   Watch. We will rather sleepe than talke, wee know
what belongs to a Watch

   Dog. Why you speake like an ancient and most quiet
watchman, for I cannot see how sleeping should offend:
only haue a care that your bills be not stolne: well, you
are to call at all the Alehouses, and bid them that are
drunke get them to bed

   Watch. How if they will not?
  Dogb. Why then let them alone till they are sober, if
they make you not then the better answere, you may say,
they are not the men you tooke them for

   Watch. Well sir,
  Dogb. If you meet a theefe, you may suspect him, by
vertue of your office, to be no true man: and for such
kinde of men, the lesse you meddle or make with them,
why the more is for your honesty

   Watch. If wee know him to be a thiefe, shall wee not
lay hands on him

   Dogb. Truly by your office you may, but I think they
that touch pitch will be defil'd: the most peaceable way
for you, if you doe take a theefe, is, to let him shew himselfe
what he is, and steale out of your company

   Ver. You haue bin alwaies cal'd a merciful ma[n] partner

   Dog. Truely I would not hang a dog by my will, much
more a man who hath anie honestie in him

   Verges. If you heare a child crie in the night you must
call to the nurse, and bid her still it

   Watch. How if the nurse be asleepe and will not
heare vs?
  Dog. Why then depart in peace, and let the childe
wake her with crying, for the ewe that will not heare
her Lambe when it baes, will neuer answere a calfe when
he bleates

   Verges. 'Tis verie true

   Dog. This is the end of the charge: you constable
are to present the Princes owne person, if you meete the
Prince in the night, you may staie him

   Verges. Nay birladie that I thinke a cannot

   Dog. Fiue shillings to one on't with anie man that
knowes the Statutes, he may staie him, marrie not without
the prince be willing, for indeed the watch ought to
offend no man, and it is an offence to stay a man against
his will

   Verges. Birladie I thinke it be so

   Dog. Ha, ah ha, well masters good night, and there be
anie matter of weight chances, call vp me, keepe your
fellowes counsailes, and your owne, and good night,
come neighbour

   Watch. Well masters, we heare our charge, let vs go
sit here vpon the Church bench till two, and then all to
bed

   Dog. One word more, honest neighbors. I pray you
watch about signior Leonatoes doore, for the wedding being
there to morrow, there is a great coyle to night,
adiew, be vigitant I beseech you.

Exeunt.

Enter Borachio and Conrade.

  Bor. What, Conrade?
  Watch. Peace, stir not

   Bor. Conrade I say

   Con. Here man, I am at thy elbow

   Bor. Mas and my elbow itcht, I thought there would
a scabbe follow

   Con. I will owe thee an answere for that, and now
forward with thy tale

   Bor. Stand thee close then vnder this penthouse, for it
drissels raine, and I will, like a true drunkard, vtter all to
thee

   Watch. Some treason masters, yet stand close

   Bor. Therefore know, I haue earned of Don Iohn a
thousand Ducates

   Con. Is it possible that anie villanie should be so deare?
  Bor. Thou should'st rather aske if it were possible anie
villanie should be so rich? for when rich villains haue
neede of poore ones, poore ones may make what price
they will

   Con. I wonder at it

   Bor. That shewes thou art vnconfirm'd, thou knowest
that the fashion of a doublet, or a hat, or a cloake, is nothing
to a man

   Con. Yes, it is apparell

   Bor. I meane the fashion

   Con. Yes the fashion is the fashion

   Bor. Tush, I may as well say the foole's the foole, but
seest thou not what a deformed theefe this fashion is?
  Watch. I know that deformed, a has bin a vile theefe,
this vii. yeares, a goes vp and downe like a gentle man:
I remember his name

   Bor. Did'st thou not heare some bodie?
  Con. No, 'twas the vaine on the house

   Bor. Seest thou not (I say) what a deformed thiefe
this fashion is, how giddily a turnes about all the Hotblouds,
betweene, foureteene & fiue & thirtie, sometimes
fashioning them like Pharaoes souldiours in the rechie
painting, sometime like god Bels priests in the old
Church window, sometime like the shauen Hercules in
the smircht worm-eaten tapestrie, where his cod-peece
seemes as massie as his club

   Con. All this I see, and see that the fashion weares out
more apparrell then the man; but art not thou thy selfe
giddie with the fashion too that thou hast shifted out of
thy tale into telling me of the fashion?
  Bor. Not so neither, but know that I haue to night
wooed Margaret the Lady Heroes gentle-woman, by the
name of Hero, she leanes me out at her mistris chamberwindow,
bids me a thousand times good night: I tell
this tale vildly. I should first tell thee how the Prince
Claudio and my Master planted, and placed, and possessed
by my Master Don Iohn, saw a far off in the Orchard this
amiable incounter

   Con. And thought thy Margaret was Hero?
  Bor. Two of them did, the Prince and Claudio, but the
diuell my Master knew she was Margaret and partly by
his oathes, which first possest them, partly by the darke
night which did deceiue them, but chiefely, by my villanie,
which did confirme any slander that Don Iohn had
made, away went Claudio enraged, swore hee would
meete her as he was apointed next morning at the Temple,
and there, before the whole congregation shame her
with what he saw o're night, and send her home againe
without a husband

   Watch.1. We charge you in the Princes name stand

   Watch.2. Call vp the right master Constable, we haue
here recouered the most dangerous peece of lechery, that
euer was knowne in the Common-wealth

   Watch.1. And one Deformed is one of them, I know
him, a weares a locke

   Conr. Masters, masters

   Watch.2. Youle be made bring deformed forth I warrant
you,
  Conr. Masters, neuer speake, we charge you, let vs obey
you to goe with vs

   Bor. We are like to proue a goodly commoditie, being
taken vp of these mens bils

   Conr. A commoditie in question I warrant you, come
weele obey you.

Exeunt.


Scene 4.

Enter Hero, and Margaret, and Vrsula.

  Hero. Good Vrsula wake my cosin Beatrice, and desire
her to rise

   Vrsu. I will Lady

   Her. And bid her come hither

   Vrs. Well

   Mar. Troth I thinke your other rebato were better

   Hero. No pray thee good Meg, Ile weare this

   Marg. By my troth's not so good, and I warrant your
cosin will say so

   Hero. My cosin's a foole, and thou art another, ile
weare none but this

   Mar. I like the new tire within excellently, if the
haire were a thought browner: and your gown's a most
rare fashion yfaith, I saw the Dutchesse of Millaines
gowne that they praise so

   Hero. O that exceedes they say

   Mar. By my troth's but a night-gowne in respect of
yours, cloth a gold and cuts, and lac'd with siluer, set with
pearles, downe sleeues, side sleeues, and skirts, round vnderborn
with a blewish tinsel, but for a fine queint gracefull
and excellent fashion, yours is worth ten on't

   Hero. God giue mee ioy to weare it, for my heart is
exceeding heauy

   Marga. 'Twill be heauier soone, by the waight of a
man

   Hero. Fie vpon thee, art not asham'd?
  Marg. Of what Lady? of speaking honourably? is
not marriage honourable in a beggar? is not your Lord
honourable without marriage? I thinke you would haue
me say, sauing your reuerence a husband: and bad thinking
doe not wrest true speaking, Ile offend no body, is
there any harme in the heauier for a husband? none I
thinke, and it be the right husband, and the right wife,
otherwise 'tis light and not heauy, aske my Lady Beatrice
else, here she comes.
Enter Beatrice.

  Hero. Good morrow Coze

   Beat. Good morrow sweet Hero

   Hero. Why how now? do you speake in the sick tune?
  Beat. I am out of all other tune, me thinkes

   Mar. Claps into Light a loue, (that goes without a
burden,) do you sing it and Ile dance it

   Beat. Ye Light aloue with your heeles, then if your
husband haue stables enough, you'll looke he shall lacke
no barnes

   Mar. O illegitimate construction! I scorne that with
my heeles

   Beat. 'Tis almost fiue a clocke cosin, 'tis time you
were ready, by my troth I am exceeding ill, hey ho

   Mar. For a hauke, a horse, or a husband?
  Beat. For the letter that begins them all, H

   Mar. Well, and you be not turn'd Turke, there's no
more sayling by the starre

   Beat. What meanes the foole trow?
  Mar. Nothing I, but God send euery one their harts
desire

   Hero. These gloues the Count sent mee, they are an
excellent perfume

   Beat. I am stuft cosin, I cannot smell

   Mar. A maid and stuft! there's goodly catching of
colde

   Beat. O God helpe me, God help me, how long haue
you profest apprehension?
  Mar. Euer since you left it, doth not my wit become
me rarely?
  Beat. It is not seene enough, you should weare it in
your cap, by my troth I am sicke

   Mar. Get you some of this distill'd carduus benedictus
and lay it to your heart, it is the onely thing for a qualm

   Hero. There thou prick'st her with a thissell

   Beat. Benedictus, why benedictus? you haue some morall
in this benedictus

   Mar. Morall? no by my troth, I haue no morall meaning,
I meant plaine holy thissell, you may thinke perchance
that I thinke you are in loue, nay birlady I am not
such a foole to thinke what I list, nor I list not to thinke
what I can, nor indeed, I cannot thinke, if I would thinke
my hart out of thinking, that you are in loue, or that you
will be in loue, or that you can be in loue: yet Benedicke
was such another, and now is he become a man, he swore
hee would neuer marry, and yet now in despight of his
heart he eates his meat without grudging, and how you
may be conuerted I know not, but me thinkes you looke
with your eies as other women doe

   Beat. What pace is this that thy tongue keepes

   Mar. Not a false gallop.
Enter Vrsula.

  Vrsula. Madam, withdraw, the Prince, the Count, signior
Benedicke, Don Iohn, and all the gallants of the
towne are come to fetch you to Church

   Hero. Helpe me to dresse mee good coze, good Meg,
good Vrsula.



Scene 5.

Enter Leonato, and the Constable, and the Headborough.

  Leonato. What would you with mee, honest neighbour?
  Const.Dog. Mary sir I would haue some confidence
with you, that decernes you nearely

   Leon. Briefe I pray you, for you see it is a busie time
with me

   Const.Dog. Mary this it is sir

   Headb. Yes in truth it is sir

   Leon. What is it my good friends?
  Con.Do. Goodman Verges sir speakes a little of the
matter, an old man sir, and his wits are not so blunt, as
God helpe I would desire they were, but infaith honest
as the skin betweene his browes

   Head. Yes I thank God, I am as honest as any man liuing,
that is an old man, and no honester then I

   Con.Dog. Comparisons are odorous, palabras, neighbour
Verges

   Leon. Neighbours, you are tedious

   Con.Dog. It pleases your worship to say so, but we are
the poore Dukes officers, but truely for mine owne part,
if I were as tedious as a King I could finde in my heart to
bestow it all of your worship

   Leon. All thy tediousnesse on me, ah?
  Const.Dog. Yea, and 'twere a thousand times more
than 'tis, for I heare as good exclamation on your Worship
as of any man in the Citie, and though I bee but a
poore man, I am glad to heare it

   Head. And so am I

   Leon. I would faine know what you haue to say

   Head. Marry sir our watch to night, excepting your
worships presence, haue tane a couple of as arrant
knaues as any in Messina

   Con.Dog. A good old man sir, hee will be talking as
they say, when the age is in, the wit is out, God helpe vs,
it is a world to see: well said yfaith neighbour Verges,
well, God's a good man, and two men ride of a horse,
one must ride behinde, an honest soule yfaith sir, by my
troth he is, as euer broke bread, but God is to bee worshipt,
all men are not alike, alas good neighbour

   Leon. Indeed neighbour he comes too short of you

   Con.Do. Gifts that God giues

   Leon. I must leaue you

   Con.Dog. One word sir, our watch sir haue indeede
comprehended two aspitious persons, & we would haue
them this morning examined before your worship

   Leon. Take their examination your selfe, and bring it
me, I am now in great haste, as may appeare vnto you

   Const. It shall be suffigance

   Leon. Drinke some wine ere you goe: fare you well.
Enter.

  Messenger. My Lord, they stay for you to giue your
daughter to her husband

   Leon. Ile wait vpon them, I am ready

   Dogb. Goe good partner, goe get you to Francis Seacoale,
bid him bring his pen and inkehorne to the Gaole:
we are now to examine those men

   Verges. And we must doe it wisely

   Dogb. Wee will spare for no witte I warrant you:
heere's that shall driue some to a non-come, only
get the learned writer to set downe our excommunication,
and meet me at the Iaile.

Exeunt.

 King Henry sends a page to summon the Earls of Warwick and Surrey; before they come, they are to read documents carefully and consider the information found there. The king addresses Sleep, personified, bemoaning that it comes to the poor but not to the great. Surrey Warwick, and Sir John Blunt enter. The monarch speaks to them of all the troubles currently facing the kingdom. He recalls the words of the deposed Richard II; Northumberland aided Henry in overthrowing the king, and the unfortunate monarch promised Henry that Northumberland would be just as faithless to him as he had been to Richard. Warwick says that by examining the past a man may predict the present; this must have been Richard II's method for prophesying Northumberland's future betrayal of King Henry IV. The king fears for the future. Rumor has it that Northumberland and the Bishop are fifty thousand strong. Warwick tells the king that Rumor exaggerates; he advises the king to go to bed. And there is good news: Glendower, one of the rebel leaders from 1 Henry IV, is dead. King Henry says he will follow Warwick's advice, and he bemoans the civil wars that have plagued his reign. They have cut off the possibility of his great dream to lead a Crusade into the Holy Land. Scene Two: We are in Gloucestershire. Enter Justice Silence and Justice Shallow. Shallow asks questions about Silence's family; these lead to Shallow reminiscing about the days of his youth, when he was an unruly law student. He was friends with John Falstaff, then just a young boy and page in the service of Mowbray, Duke of Norfolk. They continue to reminisce, and Shallow thinks about how many of his old friends are now dead. Throughout this conversation about the deaths of old friends, Shallow asks questions about livestock prices. Bardolph enters, to extend greetings to Justice Shallow on Falstaff's behalf. Falstaff then enters, and the two old friends greet each other warmly. The Justice was charged with picking about a half-dozen men for Falstaff to recruit into the army. Shallow calls the names of the men, and they come out one-by-one for Falstaff's inspection. They are Mouldy, Shadow, Feeble, Wart, and Bullcalf. After the inspection, Falstaff and Shallow begin to talk about old times again. They exit, leaving behind Bardolph with the men. Mouldy and Bullcalf bribe Bardolph so that they will not be enlisted. Witnessing these bribes, Feeble reacts with these memorable lines: "A man can die but once. We owe God a death. I'll ne'er bear a base mind. An t be my destiny, so; an t be not, so. No man's too good to serve s prince, and let it go which way it will, he that dies this year is quit for the next." When Falstaff and the Justices return, Bardolph tells Sir John about the bribe. Falstaff lets Mouldy and Bullcalf go. Shallow questions Falstaff's choice; clearly, Mouldy and Bullcalf are the too fittest and strongest men there. Falstaff comes up with ridiculous, comic reasons why the other three men would make the best soldiers. The Justices exit, Shallow wishing Falstaff good luck. Bardolph and the men exit. Falstaff breaks out into an uncharacteristically bitter soliloquy. He speaks of how Justice Shallow was no true ruffian in his youth, but in fact a skinny weakling. He speaks with intense jealousy about Shallow's current wealth and connections. Sir John resolves that the next time he is in Gloucestershire, he will find some way to steal from Shallow.

