Chapter: Scene 2.

Enter Benedicke and Margaret.

  Ben. Praie thee sweete Mistris Margaret, deserue
well at my hands, by helping mee to the speech of Beatrice

   Mar. Will you then write me a Sonnet in praise of
my beautie?
  Bene. In so high a stile Margaret, that no man liuing
shall come ouer it, for in most comely truth thou deseruest
it

   Mar. To haue no man come ouer me, why, shall I alwaies
keepe below staires?
  Bene. Thy wit is as quicke as the grey-hounds mouth,
it catches

   Mar. And yours, as blunt as the Fencers foiles, which
hit, but hurt not

   Bene. A most manly wit Margaret, it will not hurt a
woman: and so I pray thee call Beatrice, I giue thee the
bucklers

   Mar. Giue vs the swords, wee haue bucklers of our
owne

   Bene. If you vse them Margaret, you must put in the
pikes with a vice, and they are dangerous weapons for
Maides

   Mar. Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who I thinke
hath legges.

Exit Margarite.

  Ben. And therefore will come. The God of loue that
sits aboue, and knowes me, and knowes me, how pittifull
I deserue. I meane in singing, but in louing, Leander
the good swimmer, Troilous the first imploier of
pandars, and a whole booke full of these quondam carpet-mongers,
whose name yet runne smoothly in the euen
rode of a blanke verse, why they were neuer so truely
turned ouer and ouer as my poore selfe in loue: marrie
I cannot shew it rime, I haue tried, I can finde out no
rime to Ladie but babie, an innocent rime: for scorne,
horne, a hard rime: for schoole foole, a babling rime:
verie ominous endings, no, I was not borne vnder a riming
Plannet, for I cannot wooe in festiuall tearmes:
Enter Beatrice.

sweete Beatrice would'st thou come when I cal'd
thee?
  Beat. Yea Signior, and depart when you bid me

   Bene. O stay but till then

   Beat. Then, is spoken: fare you well now, and yet ere
I goe, let me goe with that I came, which is, with knowing
what hath past betweene you and Claudio

   Bene. Onely foule words, and thereupon I will kisse
thee

   Beat. Foule words is but foule wind, and foule wind
is but foule breath, and foule breath is noisome, therefore
I will depart vnkist

   Bene. Thou hast frighted the word out of his right
sence, so forcible is thy wit, but I must tell thee plainely,
Claudio vndergoes my challenge, and either I must shortly
heare from him, or I will subscribe him a coward, and
I pray thee now tell me, for which of my bad parts didst
thou first fall in loue with me?
  Beat. For them all together, which maintain'd so
politique a state of euill, that they will not admit any
good part to intermingle with them: but for which of
my good parts did you first suffer loue for me?
  Bene. Suffer loue! a good epithite, I do suffer loue indeede,
for I loue thee against my will,
  Beat. In spight of your heart I think, alas poore heart,
if you spight it for my sake, I will spight it for yours, for
I will neuer loue that which my friend hates

   Bened. Thou and I are too wise to wooe peaceablie

   Bea. It appeares not in this confession, there's not one
wise man among twentie that will praise himselfe

   Bene. An old, an old instance Beatrice, that liu'd in
the time of good neighbours, if a man doe not erect in
this age his owne tombe ere he dies, hee shall liue no
longer in monuments, then the Bels ring, & the Widdow
weepes

   Beat. And how long is that thinke you?
  Ben. Question, why an hower in clamour and a quarter
in rhewme, therfore is it most expedient for the wise,
if Don worme (his conscience) finde no impediment to
the contrarie, to be the trumpet of his owne vertues, as
I am to my selfe so much for praising my selfe, who I my
selfe will beare witnesse is praise worthie, and now tell
me, how doth your cosin?
  Beat. Verie ill

   Bene. And how doe you?
  Beat. Verie ill too.
Enter Vrsula.

  Bene. Serue God, loue me, and mend, there will I leaue
you too, for here comes one in haste

   Vrs. Madam, you must come to your Vncle, yonders
old coile at home, it is prooued my Ladie Hero
hath bin falselie accusde, the Prince and Claudio
mightilie abusde, and Don Iohn is the author of all, who
is fled and gone: will you come presentlie?
  Beat. Will you go heare this newes Signior?
  Bene. I will liue in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried
in thy eies: and moreouer, I will goe with thee to
thy Vncles.

Exeunt.

 At the palace in London, Warwick delivers news to the Lord Chief Justice that King Henry IV has died. The LCJ says he wishes that he would have died right along with the king. He's been so loyal to Henry IV that he's worried about what will happen to him now that the king's gone and Hal's in charge. Warwick chimes in that Prince Hal definitely is not a big fan of the LCJ. Prince John, Gloucester, and Warwick enter and Warwick says he wishes Hal were more like his brothers. Warwick is also worried about what will happen now that Henry's dead. He especially feels sorry for the Lord Chief Justice. When Gloucester chimes in that the LCJ will probably have to be nice to Falstaff now, the Lord Chief Justice says he'd die before he would cow-tow to the likes of Falstaff. Prince Hal enters and the LCJ says, "God save your majesty!" Prince Hal notices that his brothers look sad about their dead father and worried about what kind of a king he will be. He puts their worries to rest by promising to take care of them like a father and a brother. Prince Hal then turns to the LCJ and notes that the poor guy is looking a little stressed out. Hal also guesses that the LCJ thinks Hal doesn't like him. The LCJ responds in a dignified way - he says he's pretty sure Hal doesn't have any "just cause" to hate him. For a moment, Hal acts as though he does have a reason to hate the guy - the LCJ once threw him in jail, after all. Is Hal just supposed to forget that? The Lord Chief Justice replies that it was his job to uphold and administer the law in the name of King Henry IV. The Lord Chief Justice is the king's representative. So, when Hal boxed him on the ears, it was as if Hal had boxed his father, the king, on the ears. Therefore, it was the LCJ's duty to punish Hal for offending the king. The LCJ insists that he would do the exact same thing if he were Hal's Lord Chief Justice. That is, he'd do everything in his power to uphold the law and the dignity of the new king. Then Hal shocks everyone around him when he says the LCJ is absolutely right and that he wants him to keep his job. What's more, he hopes the LCJ will live long enough to see Hal's own sons. And, if Hal has a kid that's as rotten as he was, he hopes the LCJ will put him in his place too. Hal admires the LCJ's impartial spirit and, offering his hand, embraces the LCJ as a "father" and a most trusted advisor. Hal also promises his brothers that his "wild" behavior is a thing of the past - he's buried his wild ways along with the king's dead body. Hal also says he is now ready to defy the expectations of the world - even though everyone expects him to be a lousy king, he's going to prove them wrong, just as he promised. no foil to set it off" . In other words, Hal's coronation would be a whole lot more dramatic if it were to look like Hal had transformed from a wild child to a noble king.) Hal says he will soon call Parliament to order so he can choose his counsel and proceed to ensure that England is well governed. With the help of the Lord Chief Justice, Hal will rule in such a way that nobody will ever regret his reign.

