Chapter: Scene 2.

Enter Prince, Claudio, Benedicke, and Leonato.

  Prince. I doe but stay till your marriage be consummate,
and then go I toward Arragon

   Clau. Ile bring you thither my Lord, if you'l vouchsafe
me

   Prin. Nay, that would be as great a soyle in the new
glosse of your marriage, as to shew a childe his new coat
and forbid him to weare it, I will onely bee bold with
Benedicke for his companie, for from the crowne of his
head, to the sole of his foot, he is all mirth, he hath twice
or thrice cut Cupids bow-string, and the little hang-man
dare not shoot at him, he hath a heart as sound as a bell,
and his tongue is the clapper, for what his heart thinkes,
his tongue speakes

   Bene. Gallants, I am not as I haue bin

   Leo. So say I, methinkes you are sadder

   Claud. I hope he be in loue

   Prin. Hang him truant, there's no true drop of bloud
in him to be truly toucht with loue, if he be sad, he wants
money

   Bene. I haue the tooth-ach

   Prin. Draw it

   Bene. Hang it

   Claud. You must hang it first, and draw it afterwards

   Prin. What? sigh for the tooth-ach

   Leon. Where is but a humour or a worme

   Bene. Well, euery one cannot master a griefe, but hee
that has it

   Clau. Yet say I, he is in loue

   Prin. There is no appearance of fancie in him, vnlesse
it be a fancy that he hath to strange disguises, as to bee a
Dutchman to day, a Frenchman to morrow: vnlesse hee
haue a fancy to this foolery, as it appeares hee hath, hee
is no foole for fancy, as you would haue it to appeare
he is

   Clau. If he be not in loue with some woman, there
is no beleeuing old signes, a brushes his hat a mornings,
What should that bode?
  Prin. Hath any man seene him at the Barbers?
  Clau. No, but the Barbers man hath beene seen with
him, and the olde ornament of his cheeke hath alreadie
stuft tennis balls

   Leon. Indeed he lookes yonger than hee did, by the
losse of a beard

   Prin. Nay a rubs himselfe with Ciuit, can you smell
him out by that?
  Clau. That's as much as to say, the sweet youth's in
loue

   Prin. The greatest note of it is his melancholy

   Clau. And when was he wont to wash his face?
  Prin. Yea, or to paint himselfe? for the which I heare
what they say of him

   Clau. Nay, but his iesting spirit, which is now crept
into a lute-string, and now gouern'd by stops

   Prin. Indeed that tels a heauy tale for him: conclude,
he is in loue

   Clau. Nay, but I know who loues him

   Prince. That would I know too, I warrant one that
knowes him not

   Cla. Yes, and his ill conditions, and in despight of all,
dies for him

   Prin. Shee shall be buried with her face vpwards

   Bene. Yet is this no charme for the tooth-ake, old signior,
walke aside with mee, I haue studied eight or nine
wise words to speake to you, which these hobby-horses
must not heare

   Prin. For my life to breake with him about Beatrice

   Clau. 'Tis euen so, Hero and Margaret haue by this
played their parts with Beatrice, and then the two Beares
will not bite one another when they meete.
Enter Iohn the Bastard.

  Bast. My Lord and brother, God saue you

   Prin. Good den brother

   Bast. If your leisure seru'd, I would speake with you

   Prince. In priuate?
  Bast. If it please you, yet Count Claudio may heare,
for what I would speake of, concernes him

   Prin. What's the matter?
  Basta. Meanes your Lordship to be married to morrow?
  Prin. You know he does

   Bast. I know not that when he knowes what I know

   Clau. If there be any impediment, I pray you discouer
it

   Bast. You may thinke I loue you not, let that appeare
hereafter, and ayme better at me by that I now will manifest,
for my brother (I thinke, he holds you well, and in
dearenesse of heart) hath holpe to effect your ensuing
marriage: surely sute ill spent, and labour ill bestowed

   Prin. Why, what's the matter?
  Bastard. I came hither to tell you, and circumstances
shortned, (for she hath beene too long a talking of) the
Lady is disloyall

   Clau. Who Hero?
  Bast. Euen shee, Leonatoes Hero, your Hero, euery
mans Hero

   Clau. Disloyall?
  Bast. The word is too good to paint out her wickednesse,
I could say she were worse, thinke you of a worse
title, and I will fit her to it: wonder not till further warrant:
goe but with mee to night, you shal see her chamber
window entred, euen the night before her wedding
day, if you loue her, then to morrow wed her: But it
would better fit your honour to change your minde

   Claud. May this be so?
  Princ. I will not thinke it

   Bast. If you dare not trust that you see, confesse not
that you know: if you will follow mee, I will shew you
enough, and when you haue seene more, & heard more,
proceed accordingly

   Clau. If I see any thing to night, why I should not
marry her to morrow in the congregation, where I shold
wedde, there will I shame her

   Prin. And as I wooed for thee to obtaine her, I will
ioyne with thee to disgrace her

   Bast. I will disparage her no farther, till you are my
witnesses, beare it coldly but till night, and let the issue
shew it selfe

   Prin. O day vntowardly turned!
  Claud. O mischiefe strangelie thwarting!
  Bastard. O plague right well preuented! so will you
say, when you haue seene the sequele.


Enter.

 In Gloucestershire, Justice Shallow and his fellow justice, Silence, are discussing the lives of some relatives. Shallow, who is old, then sentimentally recalls the times he had as a young law student at the Inns of Court in London. He even knew Falstaff there, when he was a boy page to the Duke of Norfolk. Shallow had some wild times in his youth, he says, also commenting that many of his old acquaintances are now dead. . Bardolph enters, followed shortly by Falstaff. He asks whether Shallow has rounded up some men suitable for military service. Shallow says they have, and the men are brought to Falstaff for his inspection. First is Mouldy, who complains that there are other men fitter than he who could be recruited. Falstaff takes no notice of his complaint. Next is Shadow, followed by Thomas Wart, Feeble, and then Peter Bullcalf, who protests that he is ill with a cold. But this does not cut any ice with Falstaff. . Falstaff and Shallow then reminisce about a woman called Jane Nightwork, whom they both knew in their youth, and talk about the great days they had when they were young. . After Falstaff, Shallow and Silence exit, Bullcalf and Mouldy bribe Bardolph to let them off military service, but Feeble says he is willing to go. . Falstaff and Shallow return, and Bardolph tells Falstaff of the money he has received from Bullcalf and Mouldy. Falstaff lets them off, over the protests of Shallow, who thinks Bullcalf and Mouldy are the best men he has. Falstaff then selects Wart, Shadow and Feeble. Wart is given a musket and told to march up and down. Shallow grumbles that he is not doing it right, but Falstaff says that his recruits will do fine. . After Shallow and Silence exit, followed by Bardolph and the new recruits, Falstaff soliloquizes about how Shallow lies about his so-called wild youth. In truth he was skinny and lecherous, and he did not really know the important people he claims that he did. Falstaff resolves to cheat Shallow out of his wealth when he returns from the war. .

