Chapter: ACT V. SCENE 4.
The plain between Troy and the Grecian camp

Enter THERSITES. Excursions

  THERSITES. Now they are clapper-clawing one another; I'll go look
    on. That dissembling abominable varlet, Diomed, has got that same
    scurvy doting foolish young knave's sleeve of Troy there in his
    helm. I would fain see them meet, that that same young Troyan ass
    that loves the whore there might send that Greekish whoremasterly
    villain with the sleeve back to the dissembling luxurious drab of
    a sleeve-less errand. A th' t'other side, the policy of those
    crafty swearing rascals-that stale old mouse-eaten dry cheese,
    Nestor, and that same dog-fox, Ulysses -is not prov'd worth a
    blackberry. They set me up, in policy, that mongrel cur, Ajax,
    against that dog of as bad a kind, Achilles; and now is the cur,
    Ajax prouder than the cur Achilles, and will not arm to-day;
    whereupon the Grecians begin to proclaim barbarism, and policy
    grows into an ill opinion.

             Enter DIOMEDES, TROILUS following

    Soft! here comes sleeve, and t'other.
  TROILUS. Fly not; for shouldst thou take the river Styx
    I would swim after.
  DIOMEDES. Thou dost miscall retire.
    I do not fly; but advantageous care
    Withdrew me from the odds of multitude.
    Have at thee.
  THERSITES. Hold thy whore, Grecian; now for thy whore,
    Troyan-now the sleeve, now the sleeve!
                   Exeunt TROILUS and DIOMEDES fighting

                        Enter HECTOR

  HECTOR. What art thou, Greek? Art thou for Hector's match?
    Art thou of blood and honour?
  THERSITES. No, no-I am a rascal; a scurvy railing knave; a very
    filthy rogue.
  HECTOR. I do believe thee. Live.
Exit
  THERSITES. God-a-mercy, that thou wilt believe me; but a plague
    break thy neck for frighting me! What's become of the wenching
    rogues? I think they have swallowed one another. I would laugh at
    that miracle. Yet, in a sort, lechery eats itself. I'll seek
    them.
Exit

 Thersites enters. He comments that the warriors are now giving each other a drubbing. He says he will look on, and notes that Diomedes is wearing Troilus sleeve in his helm. He is eager to see them meet so that the same young Trojan ass, that loves the whore there might send Diomedes back to the dissembling luxurious drab of a sleeveless errand. He then goes on to the scheming of the stale old mouse-eaten dry cheese Nestor and that same dog-fox Ulysses which has proved quite useless. They set up Ajax that mongrel cur against the equally bad Achilles, and now Ajax who has grown prouder than Achilles will not arm for battle that day. And so the rest of the Greeks too set up the authority of ignorance to declare that formal government would not govern them any longer. Diomedes enters with Troilus following. Soft: here comes sleeve, and tother. says Thersites. Troilus tells Diomedes not to fly ahead, as even if he entered the Styx, the river of death, he, Troilus would swim after him. Diomedes replies that Troilus has mistaken tactical withdrawal for flight. Thersites who is beside himself with excitement shouts, Hold thy whore, Grecian! Now for thy whore, Trojan! Now the sleeve, now the sleeve as Diomedes and Troilus exit fighting. Hector enters and chances upon Thersites. He asks him if he is a match for Hector: Art thou of blood and honor? No, no: I am a rascal, a scurvy railing knave: a very filthy rogue. says Thersites who is then spared by Hector. Thersites thanks Hector who has exited for believing him, but wishes a plague on him for frightening him.. He then wonders what has become of Diomedes and Troilus. He thinks they have swallowed one another and says that he would laugh at that yet in sort lechery eats itself. He decides to go looking for them and exits.

