though i cannot tell why it was exactly that those stage managers, the fates, put me down for this shabby part of a whaling voyage, when others were set down for magnificent parts in high tragedies, and short and easy parts in genteel comedies, and jolly parts in farces—though i cannot tell why this was exactly; yet, now that i recall all the circumstances, i think i can see a little into the springs and motives which being cunningly presented to me under various disguises, induced me to set about performing the part i did, besides cajoling me into the delusion that it was a choice resulting from my own unbiased freewill and discriminating judgment.