in the march 2009 issue of "sports illustrated," mandarich spoke about his use and addiction and about his book called "my dirty little secrets — steroids, alcohol & god." in that book, mandarich ascribed his underwhelming performance with the green bay packers to his painkiller addiction, which sapped his drive and work ethic. his addiction was such that he kept syringes in his athletic supporter to have his narcotics supply close at hand. mandarich went on to describe his traumatic and triumphant stint in rehabilitation, and his subsequent return to the nfl. "i didn't write the book for forgiveness," mandarich said. "i wrote the book for explanation and for, hopefully, helping somebody see the light that there is hope for addiction or alcoholism and that you can change and save your life."