in 1999, henderson-holmes received a fellowship from the new york foundation of the arts, but this award was followed soon after by a diagnosis of cancer. she developed a series of poetic narratives about her diagnosis and subsequent treatment, calling this poetic cycle "c-ing colors". henderson-holmes said that cancer made her feel "diminished", and that "in order to outlive this disease, i needed more of me—not less—more weight, more desire", which prompted her to write more poetry.