certainly to respond to the gentleman who was suggesting that there's no difference between us as adults and children, certainly there is the child in all adults erm that does respond, perhaps, in a childish way at times, but i would suggest that as adults we hopefully have gotten to a place in ourselves which we are not so much at the mercy of our immediate wishes and wants and feelings that we are able to be more measured in the way that we handle ourselves and our feelings, and therefore in a position to help our children to develop that capacity within themselves as they are growing up erm and erm i've forgotten the other point i was going to make  just following on from what elizabeth there in the studio was saying.