He isn’t willing to 1) admit was he’s been doing IS TOTALLY WRONG or 2) make any changes. He’s been unfaithful and lying about it. You can’t have a healthy relationship with someone you don’t trust and he has given you no reasons to trust him.

I can see that you really care for this guy and I am sorry that this is how he treated you. That is not okay. Staying with someone like that ‘for your kids’ is a lie people tell themselves to justify staying. You don’t do anything ‘for your kids’ when you demonstrate an unhealthy relationship and normalize lying to each other. Your children deserve to be shown what a healthy relationship looks like and that you shouldn’t stand aside while wrong things are happening in the world. That goes for relationships, bullying, injustices, everything. Teach your children to be empowered and the act when things aren’t right, ESPECIALLY when it’s hard to do.

I don’t say leave assuming it will be easy, because ending relationships can be extremely difficult! Especially given your history and your feelings for him, but letting things go on like this is unhealthy and unfair to you and your kids. In my opinion, he is being incredibly selfish by asking you to settle for a half relationship because he’s moved on.