The part that is the most fucked up to me is that he is equally responsible for her being in pain and equally responsible for her drop in sex drive. But 100% of the consequences falls on the wife. That's messed up. People need more education so they realize that tearing during birth is common, or that many complications are actually pretty common -- and it really needs to be drilled home that it's not just the woman that "consents" to these problems during pregnancy, but it's also the man as well. If he doesn't want to risk tearing and painful sex, he should not have married someone and chosen to reproduce. Those were his decisions as well, and the consequence of her selflessly having HIS children should not fall solely on her shoulders. Too many times this happens in marriage -- the woman is harmed by childbirth in some way, physically or emotionally -- and the guy is like "not my problem, better fuck someone else now". And it's so messed up. Even more messed up to defend this mentality like the other commenter did. People need to fix their mentalities -- it is his problem, he caused the problem of her having painful sex as well, now he has to live with those consequences instead of trying to skirt around them.

If a guy wants to be married and wants kids, he needs to be educated and to accept the potential that something may go wrong with sex because birth *obviously* affects the woman's, you know, sex organs. If he cannot commit to her under the event that complications arise, he should not have kids and he shouldn't marry someone that wants kids. Period.