I know exactly what that feels like. My wife essentially turned my life around and changed me from a miserable cynic into a disgustingly happy man in love with life, and especially in love with her. As a miserable cynic, I was never scared of death, despite having some experience with it. I didn't have anything to lose. Now, the certain knowledge that some day, one of us will be alone... I can't even finish the sentence. Not without tearing up. The words hurt to even think of, let alone write.

As a silver lining, it has made me realize how finite everything is. How much I kiss her, how much I hug her, I much I tell her I love her. In the end, the total amount will be a certain number, and at some point, there won't be any way to raise it. I don't have eternity to do all that, so I make sure to do it every moment of every day, as often as possible, to pump those numbers up as much as I can. She seems to be doing the same.