text: He's this really shy, skinny guy who likes art and all that jazz. He really likes to get fucked up and have a good time goofin off with us, his friends. The problem is he has no self esteem and has completely given up hope on his love life and it pains me to see him moping around all the time. He's Fallin head over heels for this one girl that likes to go clubbing, working out, is kinda sketch around the herb but it's not big deal. If I gave them an attractive rating I'd give him a 7 and her an 11. I mean she's Smokin. My question is this, blades; How do I get him to man up and be confident I himself? I know he could do it if he tried but he just won't because he doesn't think he's good enough.
  The key to achieving anything is your attitude. No matter how funny, charming, ugly, annoying or even disabled you are, the only way you will succeed is if you have a good inner attitude. If this guy won't start making improvements on himself now...how is he ever going to achieve his dreams/goals? What is moping around going to do? Is he a child? No - he is a grown man who should fully take control of the situation and stop being a loser. THINKING HE'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH won't do anything! God, when people do that it frustrates me. We're all good enough in different ways and he needs to see that. Another way to this about it is this: each of us is so small and insignificant compared to the whole universe and the span of time. Our feelings matter even less...our fears and dreams will be forgotten very soon. Therefore, what does he have to lose if in the end..it comes down to the fact that NOTHING matters? Ok so this girl turns him down..but isn't that a whole lot better than drooling over her every day? Ok so she turns him down...she's not the only girl out there and he can always move on to someone else.
  i like to think that although we are insignificant to everything, we still have the capacity to influence.
  after being depressed due to my own thoughts about how pointless my life is and etc..this video made me feel 10 times better and saved my life [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6w2M50_Xdk]YouTube - Science Saved My Soul.[/ame]
  From your description of your mate and this chick, it sounds exactly like 2 of my friends, a skinny ginger kid who like art and jazz and all that, and a smoking hot girl who he always imagined to be several leagues above him. After a lot of hanging out together, a whole load of (he assumed) unrequited feelings, and some crazy partying, they got together in the end, and are now engaged...no-one thought that would ever happen, but it did, and it rocks, they are the most awesome couple I know, and generally I hate couples. So, fuck it, he should ask her out or something, any kind of response would be better than keeping it to himself and wondering what could have happened.
  Thanks for the posts guys; here's what I did My other friend who is cool with me and not so much with my good friend is having a 21st birthday party and turns out that that fine young thing I mentioned earlier was invited. There isn't room for a lot of heads so I declined the invitation and suggested my good fRiend in place of me. My friend got invited and he doesn't even know I helped him out haha. Im gonna give him this shot and hope he makes the most of it without me as a wingman.
  It's all a numbers game. Chances are that beautiful girl won't be interested in him. Unless you're filthy rich or a star, you have to ask out a lot of girls to get one - but you have to be able to handle being told "no" more than "yes".
  Are you, your friend? You can't do anything really.. You can't give someone confidence, they need to grow it. You can talk to him about it, that's about all. Confidence comes with Time. It's not over night, unless you've been confident, then you are. you know?
  It's better than he go alone, good job on that, break him outta his shell you know? Even if he aint some sexy beast, he can woo her with his personality... Most girls want a Real Dude, not some fake fuck who wants sex... Unless she wants sex, you know? She probably knows she's an 11/10.. So gets macked on at parties all the time simply for sex. If he just talks intellectually, shows actual interest in HER, as a human being, and not as a piece of Ass, she'll find that attractive, you know?
  Op, you should probably hit it just to see if it's good enough for your friend to even attempt. It's what friends are for right?