===Telephone 666=== 
 Beeeep. Hello, you have reached 666. For fire and brimstone, press 1. For a river of ice, press 2. To chew endlessly on someone else's head, press 3. For someone else to chew endlessly on your head, press 4. For the endless hell of telephone trees, please stay on the line. To speak with a customer service representative, press 0. If you meant to call purgatory, please hang up and dial 777.