#303802 ( 1020 /1186 ) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag

<Pryoidain> Meh, nothing interesting, just another day of me being a complete asshole to unsuspecting citizens

<Pryoidain> A legitimate, honest to god, door to door vacuum salesman came up at the best time.

<Pryoidain> I was vacuuming the rug behing the front door, and he comes up and knocks on it, so I check the peephole

<Pryoidain> It's pretty obvious what you're selling when you're holding a vacuum in one hand.

<Pryoidain> anyways we have one of those canister vacuums where the head pops off so you can attach shit to it for like sucking the fur off your dog or something more productive

<Pryoidain> I pop the head off, and open the door up just enough to where he can see me, but not the vacuum head in my hand.

<Pryoidain> I let him do his little speech, then asked to see his "Papers" to which he produced a sales paper.

<Pryoidain> He went to hand me the paper, I clicked on the vacuum, sucked it clean out of his hand, and slammed the door in his face.

<Pryoidain> Now, I could only experience the look of confusion through the peephole, but he stood out there confused for a good 3-4 minutes before deciding against knocking.

<Pryoidain> He had a few false starts, but never followed through. I think he was worried about what might happen next. - +