This is a 'Love is Art' kit. It comes with a canvas and a bottle of paint. You just douse you and your lover (or in your case just you) with the body paint, then go at it like animals atop the canvas. When you're done, ART IS BORN (and possibly a baby nine months later). As you can see from the picture above, these two budding artists were clearly banging like rabbits. Mine would probably look like a lady's buttcheeks, my knee prints, and the impression of a sad little dong. Total time in the studio: less than four minutes. Kits start at $60 and go up from there depending on the canvas and paint color. Alternatively, save yourself $50 and take a trip to Home Depot. Just don't go with a high-gloss finish because my penis is so shiny right now I blinded myself trying to pee.

Hit the jump for several different color combos of sexy paintings, one of which looks like a skull, most of which I suspect were faked LIKE AN ORGANISM. "You mean orgasm?" I don't know what I mean anymore.

Thanks to Gabrielle, who came up with the same concept except instead of paint you use food leftovers.