What's scarier than a teenage girl sniffing bath salts to get high? A teenage girl holding hands with another girl. But only if she actually "likes" that girl. You know, "like" likes her.

Sound like a high school argument? Then it should be no surprise this was the decision made at a high school in the Midwest that forbade lesbian teens Desiree Shelton and Sarah Lindstrom from walking into a pep rally together to represent their classmates on the royal court. Unfortunately, it was the school administrators acting like the kids in this situation.

After years of allowing male-female pairs to march as the royal court of the Snow Days pep fest, Champlin Park High School﻿ officials freaked when Sheldon and Lindstrom said, "We're here, we're queer, can we hold hands?" They suddenly told the girls there would be no teen pairs this year -- just single royal court members or kids with an adult "important" to them.

The girls fought in the form of a lawsuit, which was dropped in exchange for them being allowed to act like normal teens and walk in together. But the question the district should be asking themselves today is why was this such a big deal? Yes, they're gay, we get it.

But if you've ever attended a high school graduation or similar event where kids are paired up for a processional, do some counting. You'll notice there is rarely a class where the numbers of kids from each gender match exactly. I graduated with 34 other kids (yes, go ahead, laugh). Based purely on an odd number, there were same gender pairs and mixed gender pairs and even some three-bies who stepped in time with "Pomp and Circumstance" into our high school auditorium.

For the most part, we all liked each other. That's what happens when you see the same people day in and day out in such cramped quarters for so many years. We were pretty affectionate. And -- surprise, surprise -- no one bled from the eyes. No one screamed in horror.

In fact, I recall walking hand in hand with some of my female friends in the mall just because we were goofing around. Rather than true love, it was usually a means to drag one friend down the hall to check out the newest goods at the Gap when she wanted to stay and browse the CD racks (remember them?). Still, no innocent children's psyches were harmed as we wandered on by their family shopping trip.

So what's the difference? Oh right, Sheldon and Lindstrom are lesbians. Which means they'll automatically start making out and grinding pelvises right in front of the whole school in the middle of a pep fest. The same way all those horny male/female teen couples drop down in the middle of the gym and start going at it every year. Oh ... wait, that didn't happen, did it?

It turns out, teenage lesbians are equally adept at controlling their hormones in social settings as the rest of their peers. So tell me, the next time you go to the mall and see two teen girls holding hands: can you even tell if they "like" like each other? I doubt it.

So what's so scary?

Image via Made Underground/Flickr