look, on a productivity level, everyone else is right: you&#x27;re barely past the beginning of your life. I went through an almost total reset of my life for a couple of years after the first dotcom implosion, and I can tell you that its absolutely likely that you&#x27;ll come out of it just fine. I&#x27;ve dropped out of college (twice!), gone through a list of terrible relationships, shitty jobs, great jobs, less great jobs, better relationships, had a kid, gotten divorced, and now getting married again and on top of my career (and have been for awhile).<p>But that&#x27;s not really what you have to worry about right now. What&#x27;s most clear to me looking at your post is that your language indicates a very deep depression, and until that&#x27;s under some semblance of control or treatment you&#x27;re likely to continue feeling helpless in your life. I hate it when people try to diagnose each other on HN, so I don&#x27;t want to go further down that line, other than to say you really need to find a doctor or counselor who can help you in a concrete way. The rest of us here are just going to be making recommendations in a vacuum. Only someone you&#x27;re actually connected with in the physical world can effectively help you get through this. But the takeaway from the rest of us is that a lot of us have been through similar and come out ok and even great.<p>I hope things get better for you.