Disenfranchised grief
There are many models for dealing with grief. The Kubler-Ross model describes grieving in five steps or stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance (Kubler-Ross, 1969). In other words, in order to begin grieving one must first endorse the loss, and then express emotion. The griever must then accept the loss and adjust to the change the death or loss caused in his or her life (Cordaro, 2012). Over the years, however, how grief is conceptualised has moved away from predictable stages that lead to 'recovery' or 'closure', towards an understanding of grief that addresses the complexity and diversity of the grieving experience (Australian Psychological Society, 2016). Models such as Worden's tasks of grief (2008) and the Dual-Process model (Stroebe and Schutt,1999) offer frameworks for dealing with grief in a way that enhances the self awareness of the grieving person (Australian Psychological Society, 2016).
Intuitive–instrumental grief
Martin and Doka’s first work on intuitive and instrumental grieving in 1996 emphasized “masculine” and “feminine” grief. Many of Martin and Doka’s readers began confusing the masculine and feminine identification of grieving styles with male and female gender association. Intuitive and instrumental grieving patterns have been found to be gender related, however are not gender determined therefore “masculine” grieving was renamed to “instrumental” while “feminine” grieving was renamed to “intuitive”. The assumption that males are supposed to grieve through instrumental ways and that females are supposed to grieve through intuitive ways is related to male and female sex roles that are taught and reinforced within a person’s culture. Traditionally, men have been raised to be more decisive, strong, successful and inexpressive which tends to lead males to be more private, intellectual and introspective in their grief; certain qualities associated with the instrumental grieving style. In addition, women have traditionally been raised to be more passive, dependent and emotionally expressive than males which tends to lead women to act as such in times of grief; aspects associated with the intuitive grieving style. Though there is correlation between gender and style of grieving, no pairing of gender and styles of grieving is right or wrong just as no particular style of grieving in general is right or wrong for an individual.