Disenfranchised grief
There are many models for dealing with grief. The Kubler-Ross model describes grieving in five steps or stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance (Kubler-Ross, 1969). In other words, in order to begin grieving one must first endorse the loss, and then express emotion. The griever must then accept the loss and adjust to the change the death or loss caused in his or her life (Cordaro, 2012). Over the years, however, how grief is conceptualised has moved away from predictable stages that lead to 'recovery' or 'closure', towards an understanding of grief that addresses the complexity and diversity of the grieving experience (Australian Psychological Society, 2016). Models such as Worden's tasks of grief (2008) and the Dual-Process model (Stroebe and Schutt,1999) offer frameworks for dealing with grief in a way that enhances the self awareness of the grieving person (Australian Psychological Society, 2016).
Effects of adoption on the birth mother
It is not until a mother actually places her child for adoption that she experiences what Julie Axelrod believes is similar to the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Inspired by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s "On Death and Dying", the author attempts to show how those who have experienced the death of a loved one may be psychologically similar to a birth mother who has placed her child for adoption.
The following occurs in each stage: