i m pregnant with my four child third baby daddy he left me about two week ago after assuring me he would be there for me and this child regardless a he knew i didn t want to raise another child alone i can t go thru with a abortion my two other kid are about to be and year of age there are no day care place i would be able to take my baby after it s born i don t have a mother or any sister family to help i will literally have no choice but not to work and eventually evicted from the house i rent i have worked so hard to make a nice life for me and my two kid now after being kicked off my family s property i lived in for 9 year i am native american so it s trust land i wa always told i would be able to live on i have kept the house i rent now for year ab raised my two child i have now for their entire life myself i did everything i could to give them a better life then i ever had and tried to be a mom i never had and parent all around i never had i had a shit childhood like most of u do i wa a product of a sale my mother wa a whore and my donor wa a customer my two brother and i were never wanted or meant to be when my mom disappeared during a custody battle my grandmother made my dad take me in she wanted to take care of me because she thought it wa right my donor could care le rather i lived or died i wasn t wanted and he will tell you that his self my grandma passed away due to alzheimer s when i wa about so my donor had to play dad during this time he used me a his personal punching bag and he allowed my brother who had molested me since the age of four to do the same i ran away at the age of and made a series of bad decision everyone say i m so strong for what i have been thru and over come but i feel if i wasn t so weak and stupid i would not of even gone thru those thing i have been held down and raped by cousin a stranger at gun point the guy i ran away to at lied to abused to the point if i have hearing loss and loose front teeth due to the beating from men shot with a and hit twice by the bullet it s like i wasn t ever supposed to be and life kept trying to make up for it mistake by trying to unalive me multiple time but here the hell i am i love my kid so much and don t want to leave them however i will have no way to support them once this new baby come and i just don t know what to do the people i rent from say they will help me a much a they can but they are elderly and i don t know if they can do this for another year till my baby can go to day care i know i should of got birth control and i use to have it but my lupus make it so i get clot with most birth control and others are dangerous i know i should of used a condom but love is my drug and so i m stupid when it come to men i know this is all my fault and killing myself will leave my kid with a man who doesn t really love them like a father doe just like what happened to me i know this and it kill me but i just don t know what else to do any more i m such a fucking joke as failure and i didn t want my life to be like this i have just been trying to pick up the piece and make the best my while life now i m here and i don t know what to do but end my life i have worked most of my life since the age of so i know my kid father with get money from the state if i pas away so maybe they will help him be a better father and maybe his wife will feel sorry for them and love them too i am too coward to take a gun and do it myself because i m afraid i ll fuck it up i just want someone to do it for me or tell me how to commit suicide by cop or the least painful way to do this i have no one nothing no friend or family just mt kiddos the people i rent from and the day care lady i wa saving to buy a place with this last guy now i ll have to use that to pay for our life once the baby is here till it all run out then i ll have to sell thing till it s just here minimum so we can live in my truck my kid deserve better my son is such a sweet boy and my daughter is so strong and beautiful they deserve so much better then i ll be able to give them soon i use to pay k for birthday party now i ll be lucky to even get them a hostess cup cake when their birthday some around please don t tell me i have so much to live for i know my kid need me and i know this just passed the pain to them but i have no option i m week pregnant a of right now and i can t bare to have a abortion and yes i thought of adoption but everyone i looked up seems so fucking weird and too put together like they are severely epstein people please just tell me how to make this all stop that s all i ask
Classification of TEXT into LABEL: is depression , is not depression
### TEXT:
i m pregnant with my four child third baby daddy he left me about two week ago after assuring me he would be there for me and this child regardless a he knew i didn t want to raise another child alone i can t go thru with a abortion my two other kid are about to be and year of age there are no day care place i would be able to take my baby after it s born i don t have a mother or any sister family to help i will literally have no choice but not to work and eventually evicted from the house i rent i have worked so hard to make a nice life for me and my two kid now after being kicked off my family s property i lived in for 9 year i am native american so it s trust land i wa always told i would be able to live on i have kept the house i rent now for year ab raised my two child i have now for their entire life myself i did everything i could to give them a better life then i ever had and tried to be a mom i never had and parent all around i never had i had a shit childhood like most of u do i wa a product of a sale my mother wa a whore and my donor wa a customer my two brother and i were never wanted or meant to be when my mom disappeared during a custody battle my grandmother made my dad take me in she wanted to take care of me because she thought it wa right my donor could care le rather i lived or died i wasn t wanted and he will tell you that his self my grandma passed away due to alzheimer s when i wa about so my donor had to play dad during this time he used me a his personal punching bag and he allowed my brother who had molested me since the age of four to do the same i ran away at the age of and made a series of bad decision everyone say i m so strong for what i have been thru and over come but i feel if i wasn t so weak and stupid i would not of even gone thru those thing i have been held down and raped by cousin a stranger at gun point the guy i ran away to at lied to abused to the point if i have hearing loss and loose front teeth due to the beating from men shot with a and hit twice by the bullet it s like i wasn t ever supposed to be and life kept trying to make up for it mistake by trying to unalive me multiple time but here the hell i am i love my kid so much and don t want to leave them however i will have no way to support them once this new baby come and i just don t know what to do the people i rent from say they will help me a much a they can but they are elderly and i don t know if they can do this for another year till my baby can go to day care i know i should of got birth control and i use to have it but my lupus make it so i get clot with most birth control and others are dangerous i know i should of used a condom but love is my drug and so i m stupid when it come to men i know this is all my fault and killing myself will leave my kid with a man who doesn t really love them like a father doe just like what happened to me i know this and it kill me but i just don t know what else to do any more i m such a fucking joke as failure and i didn t want my life to be like this i have just been trying to pick up the piece and make the best my while life now i m here and i don t know what to do but end my life i have worked most of my life since the age of so i know my kid father with get money from the state if i pas away so maybe they will help him be a better father and maybe his wife will feel sorry for them and love them too i am too coward to take a gun and do it myself because i m afraid i ll fuck it up i just want someone to do it for me or tell me how to commit suicide by cop or the least painful way to do this i have no one nothing no friend or family just mt kiddos the people i rent from and the day care lady i wa saving to buy a place with this last guy now i ll have to use that to pay for our life once the baby is here till it all run out then i ll have to sell thing till it s just here minimum so we can live in my truck my kid deserve better my son is such a sweet boy and my daughter is so strong and beautiful they deserve so much better then i ll be able to give them soon i use to pay k for birthday party now i ll be lucky to even get them a hostess cup cake when their birthday some around please don t tell me i have so much to live for i know my kid need me and i know this just passed the pain to them but i have no option i m week pregnant a of right now and i can t bare to have a abortion and yes i thought of adoption but everyone i looked up seems so fucking weird and too put together like they are severely epstein people please just tell me how to make this all stop that s all i ask
### LABEL:
is depression