Write a comical, fictional, and angry review of fewer than 400 words about a technical product where all the problems are the user's fault - i.e. PEBCAK (problem exists between keyboard and chair). Include some all-caps words.
system
ek takneekee utpaada ke bare main 400 se kam shabdon kii ek hasya, kaalpanik or gusse kii samiksha likhen jahaan sabhi samasyaayein upyogkarta kii galati hai - yani pebak (samasya keyboard or kursi ke bich maujuud he).kuch ol-cap shabd shaamil karen.
user
is mouse ko na khariden.yah puri tarah se bekaar he yadi aapako start menu par clic karne kii tulana main adhik fansy kuch bhi karnaa he.mujhe vishwaas nahin ho rahaa he ki is dhokhadhadi company ke paas elite gamers ke liye ek mouse ke rup main ise vigyaapan dene ke liye pitt he.main apane puraane mouse - hardware alag ke saath veerta se lakshya karne kii koshish kar rahaa hum!- to maine sochaa ki main apane aagaamee prachaarak maichon ke liye lohe se kaansya tak behatar hoga.thik he, aap kya jaanate ho?yah "hai-tech" $ 100+ mouse puraane $ 15 ke kabad se behatar nahin he jise maine Aliexpress ko kharida tha.is bindu par, main dipiai yaa jo bhi fansy shadjaal ke bare main bhi parvaah karata hum.main sirf screen par har kshetra tak pahunchane main sakasham hona chahta hum!lekin mouse apane moosepad kii seemaa se takaraane se pehle sahi kinare tak pahunchane ke liye paryaapt teji se aage nahin bad saktaa he.main iske saath kya karne vaala hum?sabhi ek dushman ko meri goliyon ko chakma dene ke liye karnaa hoga mere adhikaar main janaa he!oh, or mujhe pataa he ki aap kya soch rahe hai.ek bada moosepad kyon nahin miltaa he?ha.is company par $ 100 barbaad karne ke baad, main unki apgrading ranneeti ke liye nahin gir rahaa hum.kya sanyog he ki ve ek bade "gaming" moosepad kii salaah dete hai.unhone mouse ko buree tarah se uddeshy se dizin kiya hoga, isliye hamen screen ke chaaron ore ek mouse ko sthanantarit karne main sakasham hone ke liye unke vishesh gaming pad kii aavashyaktaa he!iske alaava, mujhe kaise lakshya karnaa chahie or apni screen ko dekhnaa chahie agar mujhe apane mouse ko apane desk ke paar sabhi tarah se kheenchna he?!

taabut main antim nakhun tab tha jab maine apni samasya ke saath madad ke liye unki tech saport line ko bulaayaa.unke graahak seva pratinidhi ab tak ke sabase ashubh or sabase anpekshit log the.kya aap vishwaas kar sakate hai ki meri samasya sunne ke baad vah aadmi sidhe paanch minute ke liye mujh par hansata he?main us par lataka hua tha kyonki aisa lag rahaa tha ki vah bas meri madad karne ke bajaay hansata rahegaa.

is mouse se bachein or har keemat par is company se bachein!
assistant
<|system|>
</s>
<|user|>
ek takneekee utpaada ke bare main 400 se kam shabdon kii ek hasya, kaalpanik or gusse kii samiksha likhen jahaan sabhi samasyaayein upyogkarta kii galati hai - yani pebak (samasya keyboard or kursi ke bich maujuud he).kuch ol-cap shabd shaamil karen.</s>
<|assistant|>
is mouse ko na khariden.yah puri tarah se bekaar he yadi aapako start menu par clic karne kii tulana main adhik fansy kuch bhi karnaa he.mujhe vishwaas nahin ho rahaa he ki is dhokhadhadi company ke paas elite gamers ke liye ek mouse ke rup main ise vigyaapan dene ke liye pitt he.main apane puraane mouse - hardware alag ke saath veerta se lakshya karne kii koshish kar rahaa hum!- to maine sochaa ki main apane aagaamee prachaarak maichon ke liye lohe se kaansya tak behatar hoga.thik he, aap kya jaanate ho?yah "hai-tech" $ 100+ mouse puraane $ 15 ke kabad se behatar nahin he jise maine Aliexpress ko kharida tha.is bindu par, main dipiai yaa jo bhi fansy shadjaal ke bare main bhi parvaah karata hum.main sirf screen par har kshetra tak pahunchane main sakasham hona chahta hum!lekin mouse apane moosepad kii seemaa se takaraane se pehle sahi kinare tak pahunchane ke liye paryaapt teji se aage nahin bad saktaa he.main iske saath kya karne vaala hum?sabhi ek dushman ko meri goliyon ko chakma dene ke liye karnaa hoga mere adhikaar main janaa he!oh, or mujhe pataa he ki aap kya soch rahe hai.ek bada moosepad kyon nahin miltaa he?ha.is company par $ 100 barbaad karne ke baad, main unki apgrading ranneeti ke liye nahin gir rahaa hum.kya sanyog he ki ve ek bade "gaming" moosepad kii salaah dete hai.unhone mouse ko buree tarah se uddeshy se dizin kiya hoga, isliye hamen screen ke chaaron ore ek mouse ko sthanantarit karne main sakasham hone ke liye unke vishesh gaming pad kii aavashyaktaa he!iske alaava, mujhe kaise lakshya karnaa chahie or apni screen ko dekhnaa chahie agar mujhe apane mouse ko apane desk ke paar sabhi tarah se kheenchna he?!

taabut main antim nakhun tab tha jab maine apni samasya ke saath madad ke liye unki tech saport line ko bulaayaa.unke graahak seva pratinidhi ab tak ke sabase ashubh or sabase anpekshit log the.kya aap vishwaas kar sakate hai ki meri samasya sunne ke baad vah aadmi sidhe paanch minute ke liye mujh par hansata he?main us par lataka hua tha kyonki aisa lag rahaa tha ki vah bas meri madad karne ke bajaay hansata rahegaa.

is mouse se bachein or har keemat par is company se bachein!</s>
