Norman Chad  Norman A. Chad (born 1958) is an American sportswriter and syndicated columnist who is seen on the sports channel ESPN. He also was an occasional guest host on the ESPN show "Pardon the Interruption" and has appeared as both host and movie critic on the ESPN Classic series "Reel Classics". He writes a weekly sports-based column called "Couch Slouch," appearing in the Washington Post and several other newspapers. Each column closes with the feature "Ask the Slouch"; if a reader's question is selected, the reader wins $1.25 in cash. "Pay the man, Shirley," is frequently cited as a response to readers who have fulfilled the comedy quotient for their particular question. His biggest comic theme in both sportswriting and poker commentary is his frequent references to his 'failed marriages'. In his weekly syndicated column on July 29, 2007, Chad announced that he has married for a third time and has started a new 'perilous life'. He has regularly made numerous (presumably unpaid) references to his beer preference, which has switched from Rolling Rock to Pabst Blue Ribbon to Yuengling. His poker commentary often includes terms such as "squadoosh" (zero/nothing, e.g., a weak hand) and "whamboozled" (to be knocked out of a tournament). He also utters various humorous phrases whenever he mentions a player's alma mater. The phrase is almost always, "I believe they are the..." finished with an unusual college nickname, such as Demon Deacons or Ragin' Cajuns. Since 2003, Chad has appeared on most of ESPN's poker broadcasts, including the World Series of Poker and The United States Poker Championship, among other events. Since becoming ESPN's poker analyst, Chad has also participated in 50 World Series of Poker events himself. In both 2009 and 2011, he finished in the money of the $1,500 Stud 8 or better event. At the 2012 World Series of Poker, Chad made the final table of the $2,500 1/2 Omaha 8 1/2 Stud 8 event where he finished in sixth place for $36,093, and in 2014, he finished 10th in the $10,000 Stud 8 or better event for $34,550. For 12 years, Chad made NFL predictions against the spread in his syndicated column; Chad picked the winners merely by flipping a coin, and most years ended up with a winning record. In addition to his work on ESPN and on his "Couch Slouch" column, Chad wrote a book, published in 1993 by the Atlantic Monthly Press, called "Hold On, Honey, I'll Take You to the Hospital at Halftime (Confessions of a TV Sports Junkie)".