Shane Phoenix of Hot Spots gave a positive review of the song, stating that "the girls are going to love the lyrics. It brings total sex appeal and groove that starts the hips swinging and is so meant to break the set into a dark drive and into sensual exploration of a grind close contact dance rhythm". Rich Lopez of the Dallas Voice cited the song as being one of the "better" songs of "Love?" and was surprised it had "yet to be released as a single". Brad Wete of "Entertainment Weekly" complimented the potential of the song by stating that it is "sure to fit right into club DJ mixes and get people dancing"; however, he criticized that Gaga was "all over the song ... as if Lopez went into the booth trying to emulate her delivery." Emily Exton of Popdust agreed, adding that "you'd be silly not to think" that the song's chorus will become a dance-floor chant among "slightly intoxicated females (and males) in bars across America this summer". She additionally wrote that it was "impossible to get [the song] out of your head after more than one listen" although becoming "increasingly monotonous over nearly three and half minutes" Digital Spy's Robert Copsey roughly expanded on this view, stating that "Hypnotico" is not anything "we haven't heard before," although elaborating that it is worthy of a standalone release. Katie Hasty of HitFix was not impressed by the lyrical potential of the song, stating that with lines like "sunburned baby / hurts like crazy," "we're just some silly heartbreakers tonight" and rhyming "yum yum" with "some some" won't get this song "very good scores on the SAT". She concluded by stating that: "In fact, it seems that Lopez goes out of her way to sing with a little-girl inflection to her 41-year-old pipes. But it comes off youthful, upbeat, and a little lighter than the single ['On the Floor'] and her island-inflected collaboration with Lil Wayne, 'I'm Into You'." Amos Barshad of Vulture questioned Lopez' music, stating that "with the other facets of her multimedia empire clicking [...] why does she insist on continuing to make music? Why not sit back, relax, and enjoy the fact that there is something that you do that people like? Well, one can only assume, Jennifer Lopez keeps making music because Jennifer Lopez actually loves making music.