_:nfad7163ea97d46dd81e96195644b2695xb0
<http://schema.org/articleBody>
"Many people hold a common misconception that the \"Stage 5 Clinger\" is a woman. We only think of her like that because TV and *Sex and the City* and ads present women as constantly being the ones desiring commitment from men. But guys are just as often the Clingers, as this reader reveals:\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n[#image: /photos/5695b06d16d0dc3747ed6cf1]||||||\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n*Dear Single John, I recently went out for the first time with a guy whom I just met a couple of weeks ago. I'm usually a conservative dater and I would like to take it slow. However, this guy started to go on his deep and personal information. We even spent more than 5 hours together on that very first date! He started to go on about finding the perfect girl for his future marriage. I like the guy, but he kind of reversed my views on him. I am afraid that this guy is crazy. Is this a red flag for our relationship? *Total red flag. I'm sorry. The worst kind of red flag. He might as well be talking about his \"other wives,\" or how he keeps a list of his enemies.\n\n\n\nI have no problem with going deep on a first date. Even before a first date. It's how we often confirm that we \"click\" with someone—we share things on a level deeper than the superficial that indicate a true sharing of values, sense of humor, goals, etc.\n\n\n\nA good chat is where it all starts.\n\n\n\nThe problem isn't with having an in-depth conversation, it's when he ends it with… \"and I'm telling you all this because I think you're the one for me.\" Dude, you haven't even ordered mains yet—take it easy. As a guy, even if you know in your heart of hearts that the girl you just met is the one you are meant to be with (ironically, we tend to have this happen a few times in our lifetime…some of us on a bi-monthly basis), it's not a great idea to spill it right away. In fact, it's a terrible idea, because it will scare her off or cause her to email *Glamour* and ask about the crazy thing you did.\n\n\n\nIt's not an emergency, but definitely a red flag. Give him some space. See if he turns up the volume on the intense behavior or knows enough to back off. Then go from there.\n\n\n\n__Have a question about Dating, Relationships, or Sex for Single John? Submit it [here](https://secure.glamour.com/contact/singleish). Can be totally Anonymous!__\n\n\n\nMore on Dating at Glamour.com\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n  [The Smartest Thing I Did Recently to Get Over Someone](http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/11/the-smartest-thing-i-did-recen.html)\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n  [Reader Dilemma: My Guy Won't \"Give Back\" When We're Hooking Up; He Says He's Not Comfortable](http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/11/reader-dilemma-my-guy-wont-giv.html)\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n  [Sex Tip From a Guy: Heighten Your Experience](http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/11/sex-tip-from-a-guy-heighten-yo.html)\n\n\n\n###### Photo: Thinkstock"
<https://www.glamour.com/story/reader-dilemma-he-talked-about>