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"\n\n T.J. Miller is a stand-up with a gazillion big-screen cameos (next up, Our Idiot Brother) and star of the hilarious short film Successful Alcoholics. Here&amp;#39;s the director&amp;#39;s cut of our revealing chat with T.J.\n\n GQ: Hello? \n\n T.J. Miller: Hey. Sorry, I screwed up the time, my publicist thought this was tomorrow. And she was wrong so I&amp;#39;m gonna fire her.\n\n GQ: Oh, please don&amp;#39;t. So how&amp;#39;d you end up writing and starring in Successful Alcoholics? \n\n T.J. Miller: It&amp;#39;s my movie. This guy [Jordan Vogt-Roberts] directed it and he asked for a story credit, and since then he&amp;#39;s only gotten worse so we don&amp;#39;t work together anymore. It sucks. We were really good friends in Chicago. What happened [trails off] Hold on, I&amp;#39;m just trying to roll a cigarette. I think I&amp;#39;m gonna stop doing that. [pause] There we go. So, uh, Successful took forever to finish in post-production, and it ended up not being the best possible situation between us. [pause, talks to someone in the background] One second, sorry, we&amp;#39;re putting together a three day 30th birthday party for me.\n\n GQ: Three days? What&amp;#39;s on the itinerary? \n\n T.J. Miller: A dinner for the family and really close friends, and a roast at UCB, where everybody&amp;#39;s gonna roast me. And then I&amp;#39;m renting out a silent movie theater and DJ Steinski, this 60-year-old guy that&amp;#39;s like the godfather of sampling, I&amp;#39;m flying him out for this huge party. And Sunday, a drunken marijuana-filled Hollywood Star Line bus tour. Where are you?\n\n GQ: I&amp;#39;m in New York. \n\n T.J. Miller: I&amp;#39;m gonna be there in a few weeks for the NYC Sketchfest, you should come out. Just email me, you seem like a cool guy.\n\n GQ: Wait, we&amp;#39;ve been talking for three minutes and you already think I&amp;#39;m a cool guy? \n\n T.J. Miller: A lot of press people suck, man. You can tell really early on. You just get people that haven&amp;#39;t done any of their research, and especially someone my level\u2014where I&amp;#39;m not super famous and no one&amp;#39;s nervous to interview me\u2014it&amp;#39;s like, fuck. &amp;quot;So what are you doing now?&amp;quot; I&amp;#39;ve had guys be like, &amp;quot;OK, yeah, so that&amp;#39;s getting off topic. That&amp;#39;s unusable. We need to be on the topic that I&amp;#39;m writing about. Or otherwise there&amp;#39;s no reason to write about it.&amp;quot; They ask me what the biggest thing I have going on right now is, and I usually say, &amp;quot;I think this interview?&amp;quot; And then they don&amp;#39;t get that it&amp;#39;s a joke. So then I say, Yogi Bear 3D. That&amp;#39;s my default.\n\n GQ: Back to Successful Alcoholics\u2014how much do you drink?\n\n T.J. Miller: Did my mother tell you to ask that? Is this what this interview is about, GQ? Did my mother call you? No, I used to drink a lot before Yogi Bear. Yogi Bear changed my life in ways that I can&amp;#39;t explain because it&amp;#39;s not a full feature on me. Yogi Bear\u2014there&amp;#39;s everything before Yogi Bear and there&amp;#39;s everything after Yogi Bear. Like a major car accident, or the birth of Christ. Those two things are to Yogi Bear as I am to the people that use those things as...um, Yogi Bear was a real moment in my life. Post-Yogi Bear: don&amp;#39;t drink as much. Pre-Yogi Bear: like to drink much.\n\n GQ: Have you moved on to recreational drugs? \n\n T.J. Miller: I do primarily nitric oxide? And I also huff a red-based paint called Old Mikey&amp;#39;s. They&amp;#39;re both carnie drugs. There are a lot of carnies in Florida. I got hooked through this guy Old Whistles, we used to call him. His full name was Ol&amp;#39; Old Whistle, but he had to drop the Ol&amp;#39; because it was an expensive marque.\n\n GQ: Are you interested in writing more material for yourself?\n\n T.J. Miller: Stuff that I write isn&amp;#39;t as similar to the stuff that I&amp;#39;m in, but I don&amp;#39;t really care, I just do comedy. It&amp;#39;s part of why I&amp;#39;m doing the music album. It&amp;#39;s all just different mediums of comedy. You know, there&amp;#39;s sketch, improv, writing, acting, music, and badminton. Those are the seven forms of comedy. But I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff. With the album, I produced it, it&amp;#39;s all my own money, and Comedy Central came on board later. I had complete control over the project, which is always interesting but also a little bit more intimidating. You can&amp;#39;t blame a bear! That&amp;#39;s what I always said, just from being in Yogi Bear. When it&amp;#39;s all you, you can&amp;#39;t blame a bear. You gotta bear the burden yourself. That last one is also a pun.\n\n GQ: What are some of your musical inspirations?\n\n T.J. Miller: I feel a strong affinity to Ke$ha and Katy Perry and a lot of these women who are really pushing the girl power femme fatale thing. It&amp;#39;s fun and it&amp;#39;s unapologetic, and they tell women they can do whatever they want, and that&amp;#39;s true, and that&amp;#39;s a message that I want to carry, to tell girls they can do whatever they want. I also have a song directed to young girls or boys, and it says, &amp;quot;Hey, drugs are fun but they do have consequences.&amp;quot; Ke$ha says, &amp;quot;Brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack.&amp;quot; I say, &amp;quot;Brush your teeth, then drink the Jack later.&amp;quot; If the toothpaste mis with the Jack Daniels, that&amp;#39;s disgusting. I have another one called &amp;quot;Father&amp;#39;s Friend,&amp;quot; which is an acoustic song about how people should become better friends with my father. He&amp;#39;s kind of a lonely guy. He feels like my mother, his wife, is his only real friend. And there are some comedy sketches on there. There&amp;#39;s an audio skit with Ethan Suplee about me trying to buy tickets to Yogi Bear.\n\n GQ: By the way, did you always go by &amp;quot;T.J.&amp;quot;?\n\n T.J. Miller: My name&amp;#39;s Todd but I changed it in the first grade because there was another kid named Todd and I didn&amp;#39;t understand that that was possible. He said, &amp;quot;My name&amp;#39;s Todd,&amp;quot; and I said, &amp;quot;My name&amp;#39;s Todd. Well, one of us has to change it.&amp;quot; And he was like, &amp;quot;What? Who are you?&amp;quot; So I said, &amp;quot;Fine, I&amp;#39;ll change my name.&amp;quot;\n\n GQ: People who have initials for first names are almost always pretty cool.\n\n T.J. Miller: DJ Tanner? She was pretty cool actually. JP Morgan. He was kind of a douche. LL Cool J. He has the word cool in his name. I like hip-hop, but I don&amp;#39;t like concerts. There&amp;#39;s like sweat, on people&amp;#39;s backs.\n\n GQ: In Successful Alcoholics your character has this line about how concerts are only fun when you&amp;#39;re drunk.\n\n T.J. Miller: It&amp;#39;s true. They&amp;#39;re awful. I agree with the character that I wrote."^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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