<http://schema.org/articleBody>
"  1. It&amp;#039;s going to rain - creating millennial rivers of mud flowing through those two-man dome tents. No waking up in a puddle for you! 2. You won&amp;#039;t experience THE MOST INTENSE PAIN of all time by accidentally standing on a tent peg. 3. You can relax in the knowledge that the odds of you falling down a portaloo have been slashed to 1,000,000 to 1. Yesss. 4. You won&amp;#039;t get really bitter at the sight of clean(ish) people sloping back to their insanely pricey teepees and bunkpads. The bastards. 5. You can splash that \u00A3250 you&amp;#039;ve saved on a week&amp;#039;s holiday in Tenerife. 6. You won&amp;#039;t pay knocking-on ten quid for a chickpea and feta burger. 7. You won&amp;#039;t \u2013 at any point \u2013 play bladder roulette with another pint of warm cider. 8. You&amp;#039;ll have sweet, sweet full mobile signal and battery. ALL FREAKIN WEEKEND. 9. Headliners in your living room. What you lose in atmos, you&amp;#039;ll more than make up for in snacks/comfort/view. 10. Fast forward to next week and consider the mutha of all comedowns\u2026 that you won&amp;#039;t be having. *Ok, we&amp;#039;re gutted. This is our BRAVE face. RELATED: HOW TO GET A SUMMER OF FREE (OR REALLY CHEAP) FESTIVALS RELATED: STREET STYLE AT ISLE OF WIGHT FESTIVAL RELATED: WHAT&amp;#039;S IN YOUR FESTIVAL BAG? SNOOPING IN HANDBAGS AT ISLE OF WIGHT "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk/entertainment/a27549/reasons-to-not-go-to-glastonbury/>