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"So guys like you. They hang out with you. They date you. They sleep over. Question is, how do you take it to the next level? How do you go from &amp;amp;#8220;hookup&amp;amp;#8221; to &amp;amp;#8220;girlfriend&amp;amp;#8221;? Dear Single John, I am in my second year of college&amp;amp;#8212;I date often, but I have never had a boyfriend. I usually hook up with guys consistently for a month or two, but I never get to know them on a personal level. My best friend recently got a boyfriend and I am realizing I want a grown-up relationship too. How do I take things slow and get to know a guy before jumping into a relationship, or just simply jumping them? And how do I keep him interested with me without getting physical too quickly? - Goodbye Quick Goodbyes My best friend recently got a membership to a cheese club. And now I want one. Isn&amp;amp;#8217;t it weird how that works? I would never tell anyone in college&amp;amp;#8212;so much freedom, so many people your age, economic level, education level, and with things in common&amp;amp;#8212;to stop having sex, but I&amp;amp;#8217;m going to come close to that. College is weird. I didn&amp;amp;#8217;t go to school in the U.S. but there seems to be a hookup culture at American universities and dating as BF/GF is rarer. I don&amp;amp;#8217;t have any problem with that, just something to keep in mind. Like if you were traveling in India, I&amp;amp;#8217;d tell you to expect warmth and curry. You want pasta. Fine. I&amp;amp;#8217;m not saying it doesn&amp;amp;#8217;t exist, just that it might be a little harder to find. I mean, ideally you could just talk it out with these guys and see where the relationship was heading, or what they wanted out of it, but let&amp;amp;#8217;s be real, guys are liars and sometimes we don&amp;amp;#8217;t even know ourselves. So here&amp;amp;#8217;s a quick checklist: * Does he sleep over? Does he want to, or does he only sleep over when you ask him to? What&amp;amp;#8217;s he like in the morning? Does he just want to get out of there? * Does he cuddle after a hookup? Is he attentive to your sexual needs/wants or does he just get his? * Does he seem interested in your life, in your school, in your family and friends? Does he show real interest in who you are or does he just make small talk, or talk about himself, until it&amp;amp;#8217;s time to get touchy? * Does he touch you when you&amp;amp;#8217;re not hooking up? Is he affectionate with you in public? * Does he want you to hang out with him and his friends? Does he invite you to things, or does he schedule activities mostly around just the two of you doing something and then hooking up (like dinner and a sleepover)? * Does he put effort into making you laugh (a big one for me)? There&amp;amp;#8217;s no trick to getting a boyfriend. Obviously guys are interested in you, it&amp;amp;#8217;s just a process of hanging out, figuring out what you have in common, and getting to know someone the way you would a friend (except every now and then you get to be naked together). If you&amp;amp;#8217;re worried that guys are just in it for sex, then pull that off the table (or maybe just out of their reach) and see what happens. It&amp;amp;#8217;s also a process of figuring out what you want. You might start dating a guy seriously and discover it&amp;amp;#8217;s not what you want right now. Relationships are a ton of work. Try making friends with the dudes you like. See where that goes. Have you ever been surprised when you thought you wanted a BF? Have a question about Dating, Relationships, or Sex for Single John? Submit it here. More on Dating at Glamour.com Ask a Guy: &amp;quot;Why Does My Boyfriend Never Take Me Out or Pay For Anything?&amp;quot; Ask a Guy: &amp;quot;Let&amp;#x27;s Talk About Oral Sex...and Kissing&amp;quot; The Internet is Making Fun of the New Spider Man for being Skinny: In Defense of Dating Skinny Guys What&amp;#x27;s With All the Spam in the Comments Section? Sick of all those annoying ads in the comments section lately? So are we! We police the site regularly and delete spam as soon as we can, but recently, the volume of spam has increased dramatically. We&amp;#x27;re working on a way to block them permanently, so please bear with us, and know that we&amp;#x27;re as eager as you are to get rid of these pests. Meanwhile, please continue to use the Report Abuse button to flag spam--it really does help!--and continue to leave your brilliant feedback below. If you have any urgent questions about the spam, please contact us. And a special note to you, spammers; we officially declare you a major DON&amp;#x27;T. Photo: Thinkstock "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/01/does-he-want-a-girlfriend-or-j>