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"I&amp;#039;m not alone when I say that after a long week of caring for children, working, and home duties, the last thing on my mind is sex. In fact, there was a time if my husband even gave me that sigh as he crawled into bed I&amp;#039;d practically swat his hand away. In fact, I might have done that. Call me dramatic (Nooo, me? Really?) but the definition of necrophilia is having sex with dead people. Since I was drained of all life by nightfall, then it made sense that poor Rex&amp;#039;s attempts to have sex with me resulted in necro-feel me-whack! Before all you Yahoo Shine guys out there write in and tell me what an idiot I am, let me remind you of a few things I&amp;#039;ve learned over the course of my marriage, writing this column, and reading more sex and relationship books than you play video games. 1. Men and women are hard wired for different things. A man desires intimacy with his wife, but he often shows it by wanting to strip her naked and plug her when she&amp;#039;s feeling about as sexy as the Octuplet mom two moments after giving birth and five minutes after eating a double cheese burger followed by a Jacuzzi sized Mountain Dew chaser. 2. Women require constant validation. They like being told what great moms they are, what fabulous jobs they&amp;#039;re doing, and maybe, just maybe, that they look pretty in their stained tee shirt. Yeah, even that old one from 1989 with the squirrel mascot that used to fit them like a nightgown and now is about as tight as a wet tee shirt contest but you don&amp;#039;t care because it only makes the twins more pronounced, bringing you back to #1. 3. If men and women would stop fighting each other on their core differences, the home would be a much happier place. Example: Men, maybe talk to us about things other than sports, the economy, cars and television shows. Women, if men want to talk motors or oversized jocks in tights and bike helmets, just listen. It&amp;#039;s okay to get some other forms of verbal intimacy from other sources. It doesn&amp;#039;t mean your husband doesn&amp;#039;t care. It means he has a penis. At one time that penis was a source of fun for you, remember? In conclusion, it seems that women marry their mates for one thing, but then spend their lives trying to change them. The same goes for men. Your wife might not ever fulfill your Debbie Gibson fantasy. Women, your husbands might never want to hear the audio version of Twilight with you over a bubble bath. Tired wives, there really is a simple answer to getting that man you married back. SLEEP WITH HIM. Men, there&amp;#039;s a simple way to keep that woman you married. THANK HER FOR IT. (And all the other small details you take for granted. It will make your small detail bigger, too. I promise.) "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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