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" DES MOINES \u2014 One hesitates these days to state definitively that something might be the worst idea in the history of The Washington Post, a once-great newspaper now d/b/a a support group for torturers. But, heavens to Ben and Sally, who thought this assemblage of has-beens, never-weres, and once-befores was a good idea? Before getting into particulars, let&amp;#039;s all keep in mind that, in one way or another, every member of this big ship of fools actually did run for president. Mitch Daniels and Haley Barbour had everybody in the media except Carson Daly floating their names, until somebody pointed out that there might not be a national market for George Bush&amp;#039;s budget director or a former bagman from Mississippi who makes Boss Hogg look like George Plimpton. Sarah Palin had one trip around the track already, and she&amp;#039;s floated more trial balloons than the Macy&amp;#039;s Parade, especially during those times in which actual work looked like it might rise up and entrap her. And, unless I missed a memo, Herman Cain only suspended his campaign so, technically, he&amp;#039;s still running. Now, onto the specific recommendations from The Great Lost Hopes. Haley leads off: Republicans and independents want a straightforward, factually accurate discussion of Obama&amp;#039;s proposals for the largest tax increase in history, which falls mostly on job creators; his unprecedented explosion of the federal debt, primarily caused by his skyrocketing government spending; creation of a government-run health-care system that will increase the cost of both health care and health insurance; an energy policy that would drive up energy costs so Americans will use less of it; and excessively expensive and onerous regulation. This is what Haley describes as an appeal to &amp;quot;the middle,&amp;quot; which he says will be the key to the election in November. This is, of course, what every Republican candidate for any office has said about every Democratic opponent they&amp;#039;ve had since Saint Ronnie rolled the stone away from the tomb back in 1980. For her part, and with the sense of priorities that has marked her entire public career, Princess Dumbass of the Northwoods first plugs her book... Candidates, please turn to Chapter Three of &amp;quot;Going Rogue&amp;quot; and read what it takes for our country to step toward energy independence. Note the lesson I share in the same chapter about taking on the &amp;quot;elite,&amp;quot; the crony capitalists and the permanent political establishment to get a job done. ...before firing up the old word salad-spinner to say... Do you really realize what is at stake? What is at stake is our republic. The gravity of today&amp;#039;s situation is real. We count on you to lead our nation on the right path. Please let us know you realize this. Understand how the left&amp;#039;s terrifyingly naive assault on American industry exposes us to the mercy of foreign regimes whose prime objective is, at worst, our permanent demise and, at best, is stripping away our freedom. And buy her book, dammit. This brings us to Mitch Daniels, governor of Indiana and former political love-muffin of David Brooks, who may still be pining for the diminutive Hoosier. Tax reform, domestic energy production and a regulatory pause must be advocated as indispensable for poor people, unemployed people and, especially, young people. All ties must be broken in favor of private growth. Today&amp;#039;s blind, anti-growth zealotry must be contested as the cruel, pro-poverty policy it is. Prospective reforms to save the safety net must be advanced with aggressive confidence. With survival literally at stake, and broad consensus required to enable major changes, arguments about secondary issues should be muted. Austerity must be imposed for the sake of the poor. Business must be deregulated for the sake of the poor, who are uniquely immune to poison in their foods because of their strengthened immune systems. And Mars Bars must be a mandatory breakfast for the sake of the nation&amp;#039;s teeth. And, in the clean-up spot, the ol&amp;#039; Horndog himself: This year is the time to get bold.  Isn&amp;#039;t &amp;quot;getting bold&amp;quot; the reason his campaign is suspended at the moment? You know what comes next. And yes, he&amp;#039;s still nuts. There has been some loose talk out here in Iowa about the problems inherent in the field of actual Republican candidates. Well, here&amp;#039;s the shadow field. You make the call. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/politics/a12201/washington-post-drop-out-candidates-6631545/>