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" \n Lately it seems like you can&amp;#039;t turn on the TV, have dinner with friends, or even get your nails done without being bombarded with financial news. And frankly, this recession obsession is giving us recession depression. But when we heard about the new book The Secret Currency of Love, a collection of essays about how money affects relationships, our ears perked up. Finally, someone was touching on a fiscal topic we&amp;#039;re interested in. So we asked the book&amp;#039;s editor, Hilary Black, to share what she learned. (Trust us, this is stuff you actually want to know \u2014 it could keep your bond from tanking.) Q: How is the troubled economy affecting relationships? A: When people are in fear of losing their jobs or money, it can cause an enormous amount of tension and fighting. Spending habits \u2014 like something as simple as going to a restaurant \u2014 can turn in to an argument and even tear people apart. Q: So how can couples &amp;quot;recession-proof&amp;quot; their bond? A: Use this as a time to find out how he deals with money. There are four questions you should ask him: How much does [he tend to keep] in the bank? Does he save for rainy days or does he splurge? Is he responsible with money? What about paying bills? And be prepared to answer these questions yourself. Q: When is the right time to bring up these questions? A: Definitely talk about it before getting married or taking a big step, like moving in together. Q: Is there anything you should find out earlier on in the dating process? A: Credit card debt is a legitimate thing to ask about. To go blindly into a serious relationship is to risk destroying your own credit. Don&amp;#039;t bring it up on the first or second or third date, but sometime soon after that. Q: What advice do you have for women who make more than their boyfriends? A: Just be sensitive to him and his alpha male side, and let him pick up the tab sometimes. It will make a man feel small if you are always paying for things. Q: And what about women who make less? A: Don&amp;#039;t expect him to pay for everything. Q: Which essay do you think Cosmo readers will most enjoy? A: I&amp;#039;d recommend &amp;quot;Tool Belts, Not Tuxes&amp;quot; by New York Times reporter Abby Ellin. In the story, she struggles with her long-hidden hope that the man she marries will support her financially. Q: How did you come up with the idea for The Secret Currency of Love? A: I broke up with a very wealthy guy and I was surprised that my friends&amp;#039; reactions were &amp;quot;Are you crazy? He&amp;#039;s rich.&amp;quot; It got me thinking about how money plays a big part in relationships. Yet it&amp;#039;s still a taboo topic. I know all about my friends&amp;#039; sex lives, but not their salaries. That was the spark. It was clear that money loomed large and I wanted to show just how large. Q: What lessons did you learn from working on the book? A: Make sure you have the same financial values as your guy before getting married. It&amp;#039;s well documented that money is the number one cause of divorce. You have to recognize it&amp;#039;s power. 5 Money Questions Answered in 5 Words or Less Q: Do you think men should pay on the first date? A: Yes Q: Can you change a cheap guy? A: People born stingy stay stingy. Q: Is it okay to lend your guy money? A: If you love him, yes. Q: Joint bank accounts? A: One joint, one separate Q: When should you open an account together? A: Once engaged or living together For more info on the book, check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cq0CVAaMcxI "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/career/advice/a2796/four-money-questions-for-him/?click=rel>