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"  I have stared at this blank page for a solid ten minutes. What are the secrets to a happy marriage? Despite the fact that I&amp;#039;ve been happily married for 22 years, I have absolutely no advice for young couples just starting out. Michelle Duggar shared her advice for a happy marriage, and as I read it, I reflected on the fact that her married reality is completely different from mine. Maybe that&amp;#039;s the secret to a happy marriage\u2014realizing that my marriage is comprised of two people who are completely different from the two people who make up your marriage. What works for us might or might not work for you, and that&amp;#039;s okay. Just as we are different people, we all come into our marriages with different values, upbringings, and baggage. Even if you were my sister, we&amp;#039;d each have a very different marriage. My life experiences have colored how I view my relationships, as have yours. Nothing wrong with that. The trouble comes, I think, when we all anticipate that everyone has had those same experiences and should react to actions with the same response. &amp;quot;If he spoke to me that way, I&amp;#039;d tell him what for!&amp;quot; one woman exclaims, while another knows she&amp;#039;d never dream of talking to her spouse in such a manner. Neither of them is right, and neither of them is incorrect - just different reactions to the same action. Give your spouse 100% of your energy and your efforts every day, and don&amp;#039;t devote one tiny percentage of effort to wondering how your neighbor is handling a similar circumstance. You aren&amp;#039;t her, she&amp;#039;s not you, and you\u2014and your spouse\u2014will appreciate the focus. I promise. Carmen Staicer is a whirlwind of movement. When she&amp;#039;s not ferrying her six children to their various sports/drama/forensics/track meets, she&amp;#039;s usually to be found exercising. She&amp;#039;s an avid fan of 5K and 8K races and she recently earned her Black Belt in Muay Thai boxing. She never sleeps enough, reads avidly, lives on Vietnamese coffee and is a fan of cupcakes, vodka and nachos. If you can&amp;#039;t find her, she&amp;#039;s probably been buried under the vast mountain of laundry that never seems to dissipate. Look for her at her main blog, Mom to the Screaming Masses, where she chronicles her story of one woman&amp;#039;s insanity with her six kids. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.redbookmag.com/life/mom-kids/news/a13560/happy-marriage-secrets-carmen/>