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"Few topics can polarize otherwise civil people as quickly as abortion. But if we want to prevent tragedies like the recent murder of abortion provider George Tiller&amp;amp;#8212;an event both sides condemned&amp;amp;#8212;we have to learn to talk about our differences. At Glamour we believe women are especially good at this, so we asked professional mediators for guidance on how we all can lead a more thoughtful and productive dialogue. Respect the Other Side. &amp;amp;#8220;You have to believe that the other woman cares as much about the welfare of women and children as you do. Once you feel that sense of equality, you&amp;amp;#8217;re not thinking, OK, I&amp;amp;#8217;ll give you just five minutes.&amp;amp;#8221; &amp;amp;#8212;Fathali M. Moghaddam, director of the conflict resolution program at Georgetown University, Washington, D.C. Go Ahead, Make it About You. &amp;amp;#8220;Personal stories change everything. To listen to someone&amp;amp;#8217;s experience is to listen to her heart. Explain how you came by your beliefs, your love of church or of women&amp;amp;#8217;s rights, the first time you heard &amp;amp;#8216;abortion&amp;amp;#8217; or &amp;amp;#8216;sanctity of life.&amp;amp;#8217; The other person can&amp;amp;#8217;t help but feel compassion.&amp;amp;#8221; &amp;amp;#8212;Kris Miner, executive director, St. Croix Valley Restorative Justice Program, River Falls, Wisconsin Wait. Listen. &amp;amp;#8220;It&amp;amp;#8217;s easy to get so caught up trying to decide what you are going to say next that you don&amp;amp;#8217;t hear what the other person is saying. Really listening to an argument is a big part of having a successful conversation.&amp;amp;#8221; &amp;amp;#8212;Howard Zehr, professor of restorative justice at Eastern Mennonite University, Harrisonburg, Virginia Don&amp;amp;#8217;t Let it Escalate. &amp;amp;#8220;Certain rhetoric&amp;amp;#8212;language like &amp;amp;#8216;baby killer&amp;amp;#8217; or &amp;amp;#8216;woman hater&amp;amp;#8217;&amp;amp;#8212;virtually assures that common ground or compromise will never happen. Make a rule: no raising your voices or resorting to hot-button buzzwords.&amp;amp;#8221; &amp;amp;#8212;Bernard Clair, New York City divorce attorney Realize the Debate is Worth it. &amp;amp;#8220;It can&amp;amp;#8217;t be guaranteed that you&amp;amp;#8217;ll resolve your differences, but if you never talk, there will never be any progress. Being able to have meaningful discussions with someone whose beliefs are the opposite of yours can be very rewarding. You can grow from it. You can become more tolerant&amp;amp;#8212;just by listening. And that&amp;amp;#8217;s its own reward.&amp;amp;#8221; &amp;amp;#8212;Michael John Aloi, West Virginia-based mediator, attorney and president-elect of the Association for Conflict Resolution"^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.glamour.com/magazine/2009/09/its-time-to-make-peace-on-abortion>