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" Some women, bless &amp;#039;em, find The Ultimate Guy and are sooooo happy, proclaiming, &amp;quot;He completes me!&amp;quot; at every opportunity. And they really mean it, without a twinge of irony. But other girls (especially fun fearless females like you who had exciting lives before accruing a boyfriend) can get antsy about assimilating into the world of attached women. Yes, you love your man and have absolutely every intention of staying with him. But sometimes, that crazy, sultry, freewheeling single girl you were pre-him wants to sneak out. And that freaks you out. What&amp;#039;s going on here? &amp;quot;Even though you want to be in a mature relationship, it can be a bittersweet transition because it feels like you&amp;#039;re letting go of a wilder, more independent side of yourself,&amp;quot; explains Nancy Rosenbach, PhD, a psychologist in New York City. But just because you&amp;#039;re entering a more warm &amp;#039;n&amp;#039; cozy phase doesn&amp;#039;t mean it has to be scary, boring, or stifling. &amp;quot;If you think of it as settling down, you&amp;#039;re going to feel settled, like nothing&amp;#039;s exciting,&amp;quot; says Rosenbach. So listen up \u2014 we&amp;#039;ve outlined the issues every sexy girlfriend is bound to face and devised a plan for preserving your sauciness...and having a sizzling relationship too.   Sometimes You Feel Like a Single Girl Trapped in a Coupled Girl&amp;#039;s Body &amp;quot;My boyfriend is the best \u2014 he&amp;#039;ll even go shopping with me,&amp;quot; says Jennifer,* 24. &amp;quot;I love our time together, but sometimes I get this uncontrollable itch to do things on my own.&amp;quot; If you can relate, you have two choices: Brainwash yourself into thinking you have to eat, sleep, and socialize with your guy nonstop (but that&amp;#039;s pretty lame), or integrate other people and activities into your life and even do stuff solo. Nah, you won&amp;#039;t alienate him. &amp;quot;The healthiest, happiest relationships are those where both partners have the freedom to enjoy life apart from each other,&amp;quot; says Tracey Cox, author of Hot Relationships. &amp;quot;She spends a week in South Beach with her girlfriends. He joins the boys on an Alaskan fishing trip.&amp;quot; And this open vibe doesn&amp;#039;t just apply to vacations. &amp;quot;Tell him at least once a week, &amp;#039;Honey, why don&amp;#039;t you order in pizza. I&amp;#039;m going out with friends tonight,&amp;#039;&amp;quot; says Cox. It&amp;#039;s the perfect opportunity to remind your single girlfriends that you still want to be on their social map. Allison, 30, relishes her ladies&amp;#039; nights. &amp;quot;I don&amp;#039;t prowl for guys like my single friends do, but I still love going out with them,&amp;quot; she says. &amp;quot;We have this crazy energy when we&amp;#039;re all together \u2014 dressed up, drinking cocktails, being loud. I crave it a few times a month.&amp;quot; So go ahead \u2014 unleash your inner Carrie Bradshaw. Bonus: Spending time with your girls gives you and your guy a chance to miss each other.  *Names have been changed.   You&amp;#039;re Still Hot \u2014 Other Guys Know It and, Hell, You Wanna Show It  Let&amp;#039;s face it: In a little lace cami, semisheer sundress, or tummy-baring low-rise jeans, your bod isn&amp;#039;t just out there, it&amp;#039;s unwrapped and melting in the sun. You see it. Your guy sees it. Bartenders, guy friends, male coworkers, waiters, and gym buffs definitely see it. And when an admirer is particularly hot and giving you the up-and-down (in a respectfully subtle, noncreepy old man way, of course), you feel so good, you can&amp;#039;t help but flirt back just a little. Oh c&amp;#039;mon, you know you do. Trouble is, you might suddenly feel guilty about enjoying the attention \u2014 almost like you&amp;#039;re cheating \u2014 because it highlights with a big fat yellow pen that you are drawn to other men. But don&amp;#039;t brand yourself the star of Unfaithful 2 just yet. &amp;quot;There&amp;#039;s nothing wrong with smiling at someone gorgeous,&amp;quot; says Cox. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s an ego boost, a way of affirming to yourself that you&amp;#039;re still attractive and could get a date if you weren&amp;#039;t happily hooked up.&amp;quot; Plus, a little flirting on the side can fuel your lust life too, says Rosenbach. &amp;quot;Whether somebody says you look really beautiful today or you notice a guy checking you out, it builds up your sense of yourself, and when you&amp;#039;re feeling good and you&amp;#039;re a little turned on, you&amp;#039;ll be that much more aroused when you see your guy.&amp;quot; But there is a way to temper your flirty, flesh-flaunting side so your beau won&amp;#039;t go ballistic. &amp;quot;Some men find it a turn-on for their girls to flirt innocently with another guy,&amp;quot; says Rosenbach. &amp;quot;But every guy has a different threshold. If you&amp;#039;re with someone who finds it threatening, then forgo the flirting when he&amp;#039;s around. You have to know who you are and who he is and try to strike a balance that works for the relationship.&amp;quot; Angela, 23, couldn&amp;#039;t walk into a club without her flirt reflex automatically kicking in. &amp;quot;I figured my guy knew that, since I flirted like hell with him when we met,&amp;quot; she says. But after a few months of intimate dates, Angela asked her guy to take her dancing. &amp;quot;When my groove came on, I grabbed the nearest guy \u2014 not my boyfriend \u2014 and hit the floor. When I got back, Don hustled me out to the parking lot and started going off about how he demands respect.&amp;quot; Angela calmed him down, and in the ensuing conversation, they defined parameters. Now, a year later, she says, &amp;quot;I know my limits. Dancing with another guy is one thing; getting all up on him is another.&amp;quot;  Suddenly, Your Jalape\u00F1o Sex Life Turns Toward Mildly Spicy BBQ Sauce  Once you start becoming more serious with a guy and intimacy increases, sex takes on a certain sweetness. The problem? You may be missing the days when he&amp;#039;d practically pull a groin muscle making love to you against a wall. &amp;quot;After about a year of insatiable erotic acrobatics, sex with Stephan is beginning to feel a bit...comfy,&amp;quot; admits Erin, 26. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s great, I love us in bed, but we used to be such Hall of Famers.&amp;quot; If Erin&amp;#039;s not-exactly-a-complaint sounds familiar, don&amp;#039;t start thinking you and your man aren&amp;#039;t a mattress match made in heaven (and begin reminiscing about that fling from spring break 2000). Realize that your current body-slamming slowdown is totally natural. Here&amp;#039;s why, explains Cox: When we&amp;#039;re infatuated, our brain produces intoxicating chemicals like phenylalanine and oxytocin, which scientists believe may be responsible for the urge to want to jump your man so much at the start. Lots of great sex keeps the hormones buzzing, but after about 18 months, you build up a tolerance to them. To get that honeymoon-phase high again, spike your sex life with spontaneity. &amp;quot;Having sex with someone new is naughty \u2014 that&amp;#039;s half the appeal,&amp;quot; says Cox. &amp;quot;Satisfy the naughty craving by being bad together: Act out fantasies, have sex where there&amp;#039;s a hint of being caught. Behave like you&amp;#039;re having an affair with each other. Tell him what you&amp;#039;re going to do to him tonight as you wave him off to work. Anticipation can be just as heady as newness.&amp;quot; Wear sexy underwear (or none) when he least expects it. Email him an invite to an after-hours party in your bathtub. If he says he already showered, say that when you&amp;#039;re through with him, he&amp;#039;ll need another anyway. And when you&amp;#039;re not feeling carnally creative, sing hallelujah for &amp;quot;easy access.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;There&amp;#039;s something wonderful about knowing you can have sex with your man basically anytime you want,&amp;quot; says Rosenbach. &amp;quot;It may not be unpredictable, but once you learn what makes each other happy, the sex can be more passionate and intense.&amp;quot;   You Want to Be a Hot Mama and a Domestic Goddess Nowadays, you find setting the table for dinner deux is strangely more fun than dancing on top of it. Though it&amp;#039;s cool that you want to segue from party girl to sophisticated girlfriend, a small part of you may worry, Wait, I&amp;#039;m too young and fabulous to tie myself down to domesticity. You may even long for your dating days again, heinous as they could get, because the &amp;quot;comfort thing&amp;quot; can feel too heavy sometimes...kinda like chicken pot pie. Solution number one: Balance your at-home hangs with bona-fide dates \u2014 and impress the hell out of each other while you&amp;#039;re at it. Cox suggests setting aside one weekend a month and taking turns planning it; turn it into a game of who can come up with the hottest itinerary. &amp;quot;The more situations you put each other in, the more exciting you&amp;#039;ll both seem,&amp;quot; says Cox. Take him to the site of your first date for a little randy reminiscing. Plan a road trip together somewhere insane. If money&amp;#039;s tight and you can only go out once a month, vary when you do it, says Cox. &amp;quot;Make it a boozy brunch on Sunday instead of Saturday-night dinner.&amp;quot; Doing the town with your guy will be a blast, and any downsides (chain-smokers, rude waiters, blind bartenders) will help you appreciate the times you have him all to yourself. &amp;quot;A great thing about being in a relationship is that you can just cuddle up for movie night and relax,&amp;quot; says Rosenbach. Face it, sometimes you just don&amp;#039;t feel like dressing up, much less leaving the house, and when your guy&amp;#039;s on the same wavelength, it&amp;#039;s bliss. &amp;quot;My boyfriend and I call it Sloth Night,&amp;quot; says Lisa, 28. &amp;quot;We get into boxers and T-shirts and trade massages on the couch. We&amp;#039;ll talk about vacations we want to take or just listen to Moby.&amp;quot; Another way to be hot homebodies: Make dinner together (who cares if his only dish is spaghetti marinara \u2014 just go with it). Light candles, drink too much wine, feed each other as you go and who knows, maybe you&amp;#039;ll wind up stripping off your clothes (hey, it&amp;#039;s hot in the summer, and oops, the window&amp;#039;s stuck). Trust us, dessert will be so good, we can&amp;#039;t even print the ingredients here. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a76/single-girl-sexy/>