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"  1. Expectation: You&amp;amp;#146;re three glasses deep on date night and ready to try something new and exciting! Amanda says she and her boyfriend watch porn together all the time. OK, porn it is. Reality: You spend half of dinner wondering how to bring it up without being the most awkward. Finally: &amp;amp;#147;I was thinking maybe we could, like, do something different and try watching porn togeth&amp;amp;#151;&amp;amp;#148; &amp;amp;#147;YEAH.&amp;amp;#148; 2. Expectation: Lights dimmed, wine in hand, the two of you agree immediately on what you want to watch. Reality: &amp;amp;#147;I&amp;amp;#146;m really not into anal,&amp;amp;#148; you think. &amp;amp;#147;Is there a way to subtly let him know that I&amp;amp;#146;m really not into anal?&amp;amp;#148; 3. Expectation: Alright, maybe we can play along with this as foreplay. A boob for a boob, or something. Reality: You snuggle closer to him while sticking your chest out. He&amp;#039;s busy staring at the TV. 4. Expectation: This started out cheesy, but now that they&amp;#039;re stripping it&amp;#039;s actually pretty hot. You slide your hand up his thigh and give him bedroom eyes. Reality: That&amp;amp;#133; is not what your vagina looks like. You are more tempted to check things out with a hand mirror than you are to get it on. 5. Expectation: Maybe you&amp;#039;ll pick up some blow job tips! Reality: *Porn star deep-throats other porn star.* You both snort-laugh. Nothing like that is ever going to happen. Sorry, sir. 6. Expectation: To up the sexual ante, you complement the screams on TV by moaning quietly, sexily into his ear. It&amp;amp;#146;s hot. Reality: Did he just call her Chastity Evergreen? What would your porn name be? Sean Thrust. LOL what&amp;#039;s mine?! Boobie Jenkins! *Giggles forever.* 7. Expectation: You mentally note all the positions he&amp;#039;s into and plan to try that reverse cowgirl later tonight. It can&amp;#039;t be that hard. Reality: You are still thinking about what a vagina is supposed to look like. &amp;quot;But should I be shaving like that?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;No.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;But would you like it better if I did?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;No, stop.&amp;quot;  8. Expectation: Maybe he&amp;#039;ll pick up some cunnilingus tips! Reality: Actually, he better not copy this. What woman likes having her vagina motorboated? 9. Expectation: &amp;amp;#147;Maybe we can totally reinvent our sex lives if I let him come on my face. It doesn&amp;#039;t look so bad.&amp;amp;#148; Reality: &amp;quot;So, do you, uh, are you interested in ever coming, you know, on my face? No, OK, cool, yes, good.&amp;quot; 10. Expectation: Enough of this silly film, let&amp;#039;s get it on. Reality: Did you like that? I feel like there is no way Amanda and her boyfriend sex to this. Let&amp;#039;s just make up more porn names for each other. Dick Wiggles! Related:  What It&amp;#039;s Really Like To Be A Porn Star  So He&amp;#039;s Gonna Come On Your Face Follow Tess on  Twitter. Photo Credit: Paramount "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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