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" This bacon situation is getting ridiculous. We&amp;#039;ve got bacon floss, infused vodka, candies, soda, deodorant, toothpaste, coffee, condoms, pipe tobacco, Denny&amp;#039;s Baconalia, Burger King&amp;#039;s bacon sundae, the bacon bra, nationwide bacon fests\u2026 It&amp;#039;s reached the point of insanity, or maybe just inanity. We&amp;#039;re a crispy pork obsessed nation of nitrate-riddled Scarfaces, but instead of Hoovering snow drifts of Columbian marching powder we&amp;#039;re gorging ourselves on anything meaty with a high sodium count and relatively smoky flavor. To top it all off, the pancetta cherry on top of the whole greasy industry, the straw that broke the sow&amp;#039;s back, etc: The proliferation of the Bacon Bowl. More than 2 million units sold thus far to bacon believers nationwide, and a steal at $10.99. Our lust has taken Patton Oswalt&amp;#039;s &amp;quot;failure pile in a sadness bowl&amp;quot; and super-sized it so that even the vessel is edible, inestimably multiplying the amount of inherent sorrow and shame in the process. At least clean up is kept to a minimum \u2013 it&amp;#039;s not as though you&amp;#039;ll want to heft your bulk to do the dishes and hasten the massive coronary that&amp;#039;s steamrolling down life&amp;#039;s highway with you in its sights. Take a good look at what we&amp;#039;ve become. We&amp;#039;re gluttons not just for bacon, but for punishment, too. Never mind a staggering obesity rate and terrifying heart disease stats, or even the animal rights groups&amp;#039; assertions that pigs are smarter than your average starter human. No, the issue here is that the fad is just getting gross. We&amp;#039;ve reached the point of bacon saturation where the whole damn thing is so over the top, it&amp;#039;s hard to even read a menu - no matter how nice the spot - without coming away feeling like you&amp;#039;ve been lubed in a thick layer of pork fat that&amp;#039;s right on the verge of turning rancid. Rationalize the benefits any way you want, but our national pig gluttony has jumped the shark.  And there&amp;#039;s no end in sight. 2012 and &amp;#039;13 were banner years by butcher&amp;#039;s standards, with pork being the fastest growing protein in the food service industry \u2013 up 462 million pounds to a total of 9.25 billion pounds overall. 1.9 billion of those are bacon, which has seen its overall sales waddle steadfastly upward as much as 4 percent annually since 2007, pretty much on par with the hot, greasy sizzle of our current all-bacon, all-the-time, give me more-more-more pig-out situation. Don&amp;#039;t get the wrong idea. We&amp;#039;re not \u2013 even remotely \u2013 opposed to bacon. Who could be? Well, besides the 5% of Americans currently identifying as vegetarians, of course. And as far as they go, don&amp;#039;t think we don&amp;#039;t notice the way they look on enviously as we crunch into a meaty strip of goodness, trying to act like they&amp;#039;re totally content with some plate of foliage. But, enough digressing, the fact is that, yes, bacon is delicious. That doesn&amp;#039;t mean it has to be included in everything. Sure, your bacon sriracha lollipop is full of &amp;quot;spicy porky goodness,&amp;quot; but now you&amp;#039;re that guy eating a pork flavored lollipop. Or slurping cheddar cheese out of a bacon mug with a bacon straw. And you wonder why you can&amp;#039;t get a date to that great bacon-themed restaurant that just opened downtown, or to the bacon art exhibit? Though if you went to Canada you&amp;#039;d likely have better luck. Remember last fall when we all laughed at the insanity of the guy who made Oswalt&amp;#039;s &amp;quot;Black Angus&amp;quot; bit into a real-life dinner? Well, welcome to your life. How&amp;#039;s that saying go? All things - in moderation? "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.esquire.com/food-drink/a27373/this-bacon-situation-is-getting-ridiculous/>