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"  It&amp;#039;s another week in Manhattan and another party at Aviva&amp;#039;s. Will this one end well or will it end in tears and bloodshed and a prosthetic leg lying in the middle of the room? Let&amp;#039;s see what everyone&amp;#039;s been up to. (Spoiler alert: Sonja&amp;#039;s been farting.) Sonja: I&amp;#039;m not upset! Sonja was upset at the beginning of this episode. She was angry that she didn&amp;#039;t win any money at the horse race and she was angry that the other women had left her after she got hammered and wandered off. And when the others tried to talk some sense into her, Sonja just farted and flounced away in a nightgown (made for a teenager, right?) that she had somehow mistaken for a party dress.  The farting made Sonja feel better so she decided to go out on the town (of Saratoga) and get even more drunk with the other Housewives. She kissed Luann, screamed a little, and fell over about 15 times. Everyone was worried about Sonja except the producers, because Sonja&amp;#039;s antics make for good TV. Last week Sonja broke new ground on the show by being the first Housewife to be filmed with two different drinks at one time. This week Sonja made more history by showing off her very blurred vagina as she tried to change after being manhandled all night long. That&amp;#039;s right, Sonja likes sex! And she told us that about 15 times. And then she recounted how she spent the night with a man who ripped off her dress and then the rest is a blur because Sonja has no coherent story line and because it was about this time that I just started pounding Bud Lites and hoping my drinking would make Sonja sound more sane. Nope.  Carole: Sonja is tri-polar. Quad-polar? Carole joined the other ladies at a fancy cancer charity auction where she made Aviva overbid on a dress (because she isn&amp;#039;t a petty person) and met Kelly Killoren Bensimon (OMG, KELLY!) for the first time. Carole loved that Kelly wasn&amp;#039;t a &amp;quot;me me me&amp;quot; girl, mainly because Kelly made the &amp;quot;me me me&amp;quot; conversation all about Carole. If you ever want to be friends with Carole, here&amp;#039;s a tip: Pretend you&amp;#039;ve read her book(s) and then tell her how good the writing was. That&amp;#039;s the way to her heart. Never ever mention a ghostwriter, though, or she will go on a hate campaign that will start with screaming and end with her meeting Luann and Kristen in the park to talk about how boring you are. Which she did this episode. Nothing like talking about how boring (booooooring) Aviva is to make it clear that you&amp;#039;re not done talking about her. Heather: We were only gone for a minute, Sonja. Heather was on this episode! She sent a scandalous text around at the charity auction and made eyes at things.  Kristen: I model. Kristen was also on this episode! Good for Kristen! I hope you enjoy the rest of this season, girl, because it doesn&amp;#039;t look like you&amp;#039;re coming back.  Ramona: YOLO. YOLO is right, because Ramona seems to have a death wish when it comes to the other Housewives. Last week, she offended Aviva&amp;#039;s father&amp;#039;s fianc\u00E9e by asking her about her dead parents and then called Aviva&amp;#039;s dad a pedophile. This week she went on the most awkward investigation in the history of anyone investigating anything. Here&amp;#039;s what happened: Aviva&amp;#039;s father, George, claimed he had a threesome with a former Miss USA winner. The former Miss USA somehow (producers) ended up at the charity auction all the Housewives were at. This prompted Ramona to march up to her and, without so much as a &amp;quot;Hi, I&amp;#039;m Ramona,&amp;quot; launch into a series of questions that started with, &amp;quot;Do you know Aviva?&amp;quot; and ended with, &amp;quot;Did you have sex with her father and his fianc\u00E9e?&amp;quot; I mean, sure, it&amp;#039;s not appropriate for Aviva&amp;#039;s father to lie about stuff like that, but it&amp;#039;s also not appropriate to approach a complete stranger and start demanding to know where they were the night of Tuesday the 15th. And here&amp;#039;s a question: Why is Ramona so involved in George&amp;#039;s sex life? If she wants to bring him down, I don&amp;#039;t think letting the world know that he&amp;#039;s (1) having sex with younger women and (2) lying about having sex with younger women is going to do that. Unfortunately, that&amp;#039;s a thing that happens all the time. Aviva: I&amp;#039;m not a liar! And just like that, Aviva&amp;#039;s redemption tour is derailed yet again. What Aviva should learn from this episode is that she can never have any of these women over again. Ever. Because it&amp;#039;s always going to end badly.  This time it&amp;#039;s Luann who spoils the party. Luann is angry that Aviva invited Miss USA to her auction (she didn&amp;#039;t; the producers clearly did that) and then ruined the event by texting and laughing throughout. That I will give her. What was so important about your dad having sex with Miss USA that you had to text it during some kind of benefit? And why in the world would Aviva send that text to Heather (who hates her) if she didn&amp;#039;t want drama? I&amp;#039;m not getting Aviva: Is she trying to make friends or is she always trying to start something? Is it both? Why is everything always about her dad too? Isn&amp;#039;t there anything more interesting in her life? If my parents were having threesomes (excuse me, I have a case of the dry heaves) I certainly wouldn&amp;#039;t be sharing it. In fact, I&amp;#039;d probably go right to the phone book to figure out whether that eternal sunshine of that spotless mind stuff is real because I would want to forget all of it. Aviva is once again insulted in her own home and Luann crashes out of Aviva&amp;#039;s sitting room calling her rude and a liar. Luann wrote the book on manners, so I guess that&amp;#039;s an OK thing to do at parties now. I&amp;#039;m going to one on Saturday so I&amp;#039;ll make sure to show off my own yelling skills. Next week: *~CoNfRoNtAtIoNs~* RELATED: The Real Housewives of New York Recap: Ramona Ruins Everything (Season 6, Episode 13)  Follow Mark on Twitter. Photo Credit: Bravo "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/news/a7161/real-housewives-recap-season-6-episode-14/>