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"For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Sex is no different. For many women, especially after kids, they have about as much interest in sex as men have in watching an Oprah marathon while getting their man parts waxed. For others, the desire for sex is still burning; it&amp;#039;s just flickering low beneath piles of housework and overwhelming child rearing pressures. Then there&amp;#039;s women like Kimberly Ford who has one simple answer to the harrowing transition of single hood into marriage and family. Hump. In her new book by St. Martin&amp;#039;s Griffin, Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, Ford candidly offers up enticing chapters about her dive back into the marriage bed (just two weeks after her first son was born) and those of many others. Its tone is casual, a bit dirty, but always funny. She&amp;#039;s the neighbor you wish you had but in some ways are glad you didn&amp;#039;t. (For us hormonal post children women, we might not appreciate the hot neighbor next door whispering to our husbands, &amp;quot;Post vaginal tear sex is sooo underrated.&amp;quot; But Ford is pretty hilarious. Personally, I&amp;#039;d take hot blond and sex talk over next door&amp;#039;s uptight lawyer any day of the week.) With easy to read chapters illuminating topics from sex toys, masturbation, laser hair removal and porn, Ford confesses that sex after babies isn&amp;#039;t just something to slowly ease into. She instead clings to it, determined not to let her pre-baby vavoom get washed out with the bathwater.  Take this scene which describes her in-laws downstairs while she&amp;#039;s quietly led her husband to their bedroom. &amp;quot;The baby is all but tossed on the bed. The husband is pulled to the wife&amp;#039;s body, her hand pressed hard to the back of his head as she kisses him. She starts unbuckling his belt and pulling at the button fly of his blue jeans. Her hands are then on her own T-shirt, pressing the hard roundness of her newly transformed breasts. The T-shirt is up and off, the damp and crusty nursing bra flung on the floor....&amp;quot;  She goes on. &amp;quot;Now Baby Lucas&amp;#039;s dad is thinking blow job at best. He&amp;#039;s witnessed the subtle jokes and not-so-subtle admonitions of couples who&amp;#039;ve gone before them. No sex it to be had...&amp;quot; &amp;quot;But Lucas&amp;#039;s mom has her husband&amp;#039;s jeans off and boxer shorts down...&amp;quot;&amp;quot;She&amp;#039;s arching her hips up towards him because \u2013 much to Lucas&amp;#039;s father&amp;#039;s immediate arousal \u2013 she seems to want to fxxx.&amp;quot; A few sentences later Ford writes, &amp;quot;She is immensely relieved to be having sex. She feels cared for and renewed and astoundingly close to her husband.&amp;quot; In a world full of contradictions - &amp;quot;Lose 10 pounds but eat this cake!&amp;quot; Hump is certainly food for thought. And while I&amp;#039;ve yet to define my pre-mother self through my husband&amp;#039;s penis, I do see the wisdom (and entertainment) in much of Ford&amp;#039;s writing. Maybe the answer is to stop bitching and start humping. I&amp;#039;ll let you know. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/relationships/a2714/when-all-else-fails-hump/>